DD18.3

All of a sudden, a red thorn grazed past my cheek and nailed itself in the carp. The white veil enfolding us pops. We’re slowly doused in the red misery. Without a shroud to protect the mind, the carp’s reddish light directly enters my eyes. My mind is slipping in. I tried to block the light with my palm.

“YuRia… Hand me a ribbon with the feel of enveloping something… Purple would be good…”

I can hardly speak at this point. My voice was so small and coarse.

“Here…!”

I wrapped the ribbon YuRia gave around the smoking pipe. And I exhaled a deep, violet breath. Dark smoke billowed from the pipe and surrounded the carp, holding it in place and restraining the light it emitted. I approached the carp and removed the thorns stuck in its body, one by one. The carp shrilled each time a thorn was pulled out. The piercing shrieks invoked visions of Fei’s past in my head.

“You just wanted to sing.”

I pull out a thorn.

“You were always alone at home.”

I pull out a thorn.

“You became friends with fellow students who enjoyed your songs.”

I pull out a thorn.

“You were happy that your friends would listen to the songs you wrote.”

I pull out a thorn.

“But those friends changed as time passed.”

I pull out a thorn.

“Your friends only liked you for your pretty voice.”

I pull out a thorn.

“They were only interested in your voice, not the songs you made.”

I pull out a thorn.

“You began to think that your friends were jealous of you for that reason. You thought you were being hated.”

I pull out a thorn.

“You were upset. You started hating your friends.”

I pull out a thorn.

“That’s why, Fei, you pushed away your friends one-sidedly.”

I pull out a thorn.

“You became all alone.”

I pull out a thorn.

“Fei. The mermaids that are inflicting pain upon you are illusions you created.”

I pull out a thorn.

“You created a space to feel hurt and vent your anger.”

I pull out a thorn.

“Maybe the malice your friends bear is an illusion as well. You’ll never know until you have a heart to heart with them.”

I pull out a thorn.

“Doubt and anger fostered by presumptions you make on your own will only harm you.”

I continued to pluck out the thorns. My ears are bleeding. My consciousness is barely holding up. She can be categorized as a type who experienced rejection from others. They create a space for themselves, and swallow their anger inside it. Without a vent to dissipate the rage, the emotion will eat away at them.

The last remaining thorn is pulled out.

“You’ll face many hardships similar to this in the future. Please don’t hurt yourself because of that. We need to have the courage to check the true feelings of others and ourselves. The process will surely be uncomfortable and painful, just like now. Feel free to contact me whenever you feel troubled with it. We’ll ponder on the matter together.”

The Distortion Detective Chapter 18: A Carp and Mermaids