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Feb 19th, 2018
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  1. Input: Champagne for my real friends
  2. Output: and real pain for my sham friends!
  3.  
  4. Input: Pseudopods for my real friends
  5. Output: and real pods for my pseudo-friends!
  6.  
  7. Input: Petticoats for my real friends
  8. Output: and real coats for my petty friends.
  9.  
  10. Input: Loosestrife for my real friends
  11. Output: and real strife for my loose friends!
  12.  
  13. Input: Ladybugs for my real friends
  14. Output: and real bugs for my lady friends!
  15.  
  16. Input: Single-payer for my real friends
  17. Output: and RealPlayer for my single friends.
  18.  
  19. Input: Tumbleweeds for my real friends
  20. Output: and real weed for my Tumblr friends!
  21.  
  22. Input: Fauxhawks for my real friends
  23. Output: and real hawks for my faux friends!
  24.  
  25. Input: Platonic solids for my real friends
  26. Output: and real solids for my platonic friends!
  27.  
  28. ew
  29. rw
  30. eds
  31. ed
  32. (w+) ?([^oatr ]w{3}.+)real
  33. and real $2$1
  34. C
  35. S
  36. gne
  37. in
  38. o
  39. o-
  40. ti
  41. ty
  42. T`TL`Tl
  43. pw+y.+
  44. $&.
  45. s$
  46. s!
  47. real -p
  48. RealPl
  49.  
  50. (w+) ?([^oatr ]w{3}.+)real
  51. and real $2$1
  52.  
  53. T`TL`Tl
  54.  
  55. pw+y.+
  56. $&.
  57. s$
  58. s!
  59.  
  60. _╔x⅜²‘,8WWAa"⅞+1Tλ²⅞ƨ◄…χŗbdŗu8ņ∑Ι⅓I‼hzΔμō┘═q‼xΘ▼²ηpG⅔─┌¡↕+wd÷[≈┐α┌ļ○(‚δΦEΤα{‚φ▒k׀:╚s&⅛↑»‘ |Θwθ1w"ρ└⁸‘S∆∫⁴‘a1>*+oo"¤Ε○Φr‘o2w _@ŗo"æn‘o"χ}49⁶‘aWT
  61.  
  62. RealPlayer single_|weed Tumblr_|strife loose_|bugs lady_|pods pseudo-|pain sham_|solids platonic_|coats petty_|hawks faux_
  63.  
  64. ..‘,8WWAa"..‘ |Θwθ1w"..‘S∆∫⁴‘a1>*+oo"..‘o2w _@ŗo"..‘o"..‘aWT strings shortened
  65. ..‘ push "personcake" (the indexing string) ["personcake"]
  66. 8W get the 8-th char
  67. , from the input ["personcake", "c"]
  68. W get its in "personcake" (1-indexed) [7]
  69. Aa save on variable A [7]
  70. "..‘ push the long string [7, "RealPlayer...faux_"]
  71. |Θ split on "|" [7, ["RealPlayer single_", ..., "hawks faux_"]]
  72. w get the Ath item of the array [["..."], "solids platonic_"]
  73. θ split on spaces [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"]]
  74. 1w get the 1st item [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "solids"]
  75. "..‘ push "and " [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "solids", "and "]
  76. S∆∫⁴‘ push "real " [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "solids", "and ", "real "]
  77. a1>* multiply by A(index) > 1 [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "solids", "and ", "real "]
  78. + join together [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "solids", "and real "]
  79. o output [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "solids"]
  80. o output (the 1st item of the array) [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"]]
  81. "..‘o output " for my " [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"]]
  82. 2w get the 2nd item of the array [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "platonic_"]
  83. _@ŗ replace "_" with " " [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "platonic "]
  84. o output that [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"]]
  85. "..‘o output "friends" [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"]]
  86. "..‘ push ".!!!!!!.!" [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], ".!!!!!!.!"]
  87. aW get the Ath item [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"], "!"]
  88. T output, disabling implicit output [["..."], ["solids", "platonic_"]]
  89.  
  90. h a{r=indexOf(a[7:8],"noarspekc")A="pain>pods>coats>strife>Player>bugs>weed>hawks>solids>sham >pseudo->petty >loose >lady >single >Tumblr >faux >platonic >!>!>.>!>!>.>!>!>!"/">";["and "];["Real"]if[r=4]else["real "];[A[r]," for my ",A[r+9],"friends",A[r+18]]}
  91.  
  92. h a{
  93. r=indexOf(a[7:8],"noarspekc") /*Gets the index of the character in this string*/
  94. /*Variable A contains all the unique words for each test case*/
  95. A="pain>pods>coats>strife>Player>bugs>weed>hawks>solids>sham >pseudo->petty >loose >lady >single >Tumblr >faux >platonic >!>!>.>!>!>.>!>!>!"/">"
  96. ["and "]
  97. ["Real"]if[r=4]else["real "] /*RealPlayer*/
  98. [A[r]," for my ",A[r+9],"friends",A[r+18]] /*Print everything using var A*/
  99. }
  100.  
  101. and real <?=[pods,solids,hawks,strife,RealPlayer,pain,bugs,weed,coats][$q=md5($argv[1].LnI)%9].' for my '.[pseudo,platonic,faux,loose,single,sham,lady,Tumblr,petty][$q].' -'[!$q].friends.'.!'[!$q||$q&3];
  102.  
  103. sub f{
  104. my($_)=@_;
  105. s,(S+[oieyxm ])(S{4}.+)real,and real $2l$1,;
  106. s,gne,in,;
  107. s,ch,sh,;
  108. s,ti,ty,;
  109. s,eds,ed,;
  110. s,tumble,Tumblr,;
  111. s,real -p,RealPl,;
  112. s,o ,o-,;
  113. s,c ,c,;
  114. /ng|tt/?"$_.":"$_!"
  115. }
  116.  
  117. i,j,c;f(char*s){c=s[7]-97;char t[9],u[200];char*r=s;s+=j=c&&c-17?c-10&&c-18?c-2?5:8:3:4;for(i=0;*++s-32;t[i++]=*s);t[c-4?i:i-1]=0;for(i=0;*r++-t[0];)u[i++]=*(r-1);u[i]=32;u[i+1]=0;u[0]+=32;u[c?i:i-1]=c?c-2?c-14?32:45:0:121;printf("and %s%s for my %sfriends%c",c-15?"real ":"RealPlayer",c-15?c-13?t:"pain":"",c-13?c-4?c-17?u:"loose ":"Tumblr ":"sham ",c&&c-15?33:46);}
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