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Living Breathing Fuel Blocks Alliance Mail

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Sep 18th, 2017
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  1. Operation: REEEEEEEEEElocation
  2.  
  3. Alright folks, it's been rough trying to keep this hush-hush until things could get setup properly, but the wait is over. This is the situation and how we're going to handle it.
  4.  
  5. As we all know, v0lta has been camping our pipe with logoff cyno campers and picking apart our Rorquals and various other capitals as they see fit. Test has been trying to organize a response beyond just reverse camping them (you may have noticed some new names in the intel channel announcing v0lta fleet formations recently) but with their war on Tri still ongoing, they haven't been able to dedicate a substantial defense fleet to protect us. The simple fact is that our formerly quiet little corner of the universe is just too far away from proper Test space for them to quickly respond. v0lta knows that, and has been taking advantage of that fact to camp us on their own schedule. Well, as with most schoolyard bullies, they took it too far. Dran Arcana (head Test diplo and Test second-in-command) tried to be diplomatic with them and even offered to pay them to go fuck with someone else and leave us alone. v0lta spit in his face and instead demanded that he pay them ransom money on a per-constellation basis to leave us alone. Daddy Dran don't play that. While I won't bore you with the entire conversation, I will leave you with a few choice quotes from Dran to the heads of the Test super and blops fleets. "I want you to skullfuck his dreams," was a personal favorite of mine, followed by "I want full autism. Working orders are volt has no fun. I don't want Fair fights, I don't want fun fights, I want dead t3s."
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  7. Unfortunately, Test is still at war with Tri (who isn't quite dead yet) so Test can't deploy the entirety of their super fleet down here to keep us warm at night. So instead, we're going to them. We will be TEMPORARILY relocating ratting and mining operations to a new area of space not too far from here. Temporarily. As in: not permanently. I know we're going to get a lot of questions about this, so I want to make that part perfectly clear. You don't need to pack up all your shit. You don't need to move every single isk worth of assets down to the new area. This is just a temporary thing to put us within Test's jump range. If we get attacked, they want to be able to respond at a moment's notice to come drop billions and billions of tons of shit, pain, and hate on top of these assholes. If they drop 20 T3Cs, Test wants to drop 40 supers. They want to respond quickly and decisively with an overwhelming force to come and break their toys and take away their fun. This isn't meant to be a "fight," in the traditional sense of the word. This is more akin to pouring molten metal down an anthill.
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  9. The new section of space will recieve the same IHUB upgrades that we're used to down here, although it will be up to us to get the military and industry indexes up to level 5. Knowing how we've all been cooped up lately, I'm sure this won't take longer than a day or two. It also will have Fortizars, Sotiyos, Azbels, and Raitarus, so all the usual amenities we're used to. We will be getting buyback set up and shifting the jump freighter service destination accordingly, so that after we arrive on the scene there should be as little change in your daily operation as possible.
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  11. With that being said, there are a few things we need from all of you during this TEMPORARY relocation. Most significantly, during this TEMPORARY relocation, there is to be ZERO ratting or mining in the current pipe. All mining and ratting needs to take place in the new location. We absolutely cannot afford to keep feeding them easy kills, or we'll never see the end of them. If they want to fuck with us, it's going to be on OUR terms. We also need as many people as possible present for the actual move. This will almost certainly take multiple trips, so you will have multiple opportunities to move ships into place if you can't make the first move. For caps, we'll have a cyno chain (so stock up on isotopes now!) and for sub-caps we'll have coordinated move ops en masse. If you are a Rorqual pilot, and your Rorq is set up with the EXACT bling fit with zero deviations, and you would like to continue to use it here, please contact Neverodd Oreven or Boaty McBoaten about remaining in place here.
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  13. I'm sure you all have questions, and I'll do my best to answer them as I can. Please do keep in mind though that some things have been intentionally omitted from this letter for OPSEC purposes. Please don't be upset if your questions simply cannot be answered at this time, but I'll do my best to address issues as the come up as well as some questions I'm sure you're already thinking about.
  14.  
  15. Q: Where is the new location?
  16. A: It is not too far from here, and it is closer to D-P than our current location. Beyond that, I cannot say yet.
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  18. Q: When is this happening?
  19. A: Within the next few days. Certainly within a week. Again, I can't give exact times and dates until everything is in place.
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  21. Q: How will I use the buyback? How will I use the jump freighter service?
  22. A: All of that will be in place in the new location. Don't worry your pretty little head.
  23.  
  24. Q: How will I utilize my PI chain?
  25. A: The same way you've been doing it. Our current pipe is not off limits for PI, exploration, production, etc... Only mining and ratting are off limits. You may want a Yacht or Travelceptor to get from place to place, or just jumpclone.
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  27. Q: Where will I park my super? My POS is still down here.
  28. A: You can dock in the Keepstar in D-PNP9. I would recommend moving a cyno alt down there, but if you cannot do that many of us will have cyno alts in place, and you can always try your luck with the Friendship Cyno Fleet. They do tend to keep a cyno burning at the Keepstar most of the time.
  29.  
  30. Q: But I don't wanna!
  31. A: That is not a question and also fuck you. Seriously though, none of us want to. Many, many, MANY less annoying solutions were tried but fell through for one reason or another. If there was a simpler way, we'd have done it. Just bear with us for the first few days of shitty belt ratting and mining and we'll all come out of this with a fun story about the time a tiny little carebear renter alliance caused the big scary wormholers to dock up in fear.
  32.  
  33. Q: How long will this last?
  34. A: Not a day longer than is absolutely necessary. If Test can wrap up the war with Tri soon, we'll come home and they'll stage from here. That appears to be the most likely scenario, but wars can be weird like that. If the war drags on, we'll continue to krab it up in the new area and Daddy Dran and Uncle Seiku will standby to mob on any idiots stupid enough to interfere.
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  36. That's it for now folks. Take care, and fly safe!
  37. o7
  38. --Sin
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