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- HOUR TWO Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Zbyszko.
- - Michael Buffer does the honors. Wow ... did DDP ever get a Buffer intro?
- - RAVEN vs. BILL GOLDBERG
- WCW lays off the "first title match!" thing, which is a good idea since
- people are starting to remember that Goldberg actually got a TV Title
- shot back in October.
- Wait a minute ... this being a Raven match, that means it's "no DQ",
- right? So if neither man can be DQ'ed, and neither can be counted out
- (because the WCW officials have lately refused to count guys out when
- they brawl outside the ring in "no DQ" matches), then the only possible
- finishes are Raven getting the pin, or Goldberg winning the title! Anyone
- REALLY think Raven has a chance of getting the pin? Even with help from
- the Flock?
- The match starts out with Goldberg slamming Raven into the guard rails
- down on the floor. Schiavone confirms that this is "Raven's Rules" (no
- DQ), and that because of it there is no countout. How in the hell can
- Raven possibly win?! Back in the ring Goldberg does that leg roll-up
- which is similar to the one Hogan uses when he actually feels like
- wrestling. He then kicks Raven in the head with a reverse kick--which
- Tony and Larry hail as a tremendous new move. They move back to the
- floor, where Raven uses a chair on Goldberg. They go back in the ring and
- Raven trips Goldberg onto the chair (which I'll go on record as saying is
- the most impressive thing I saw Goldberg do in this match). Raven gets in
- a few more chair shots, then slaps of a sleeper. Goldberg powers his way
- out of it. Raven whips him into the corner and delivers a clothesline,
- which Goldberg shakes off. Raven tries again, but Goldberg catches him in
- the gut with the spear. The crowd goes wild.
- Suddenly the Flock comes in. Kidman does a drop-kick which Goldberg
- shrugs off. Sick Boy gets clotheslined out of the ring. The newest Flock
- member, who everyone says is Horace Boulder, nails Goldberg with a stop
- sign. Goldberg no-sells it and dumps the guy out. Reece comes in and
- hoists him up, but Goldberg breaks free and delivers a vertical suplex.
- Raven, realizing now that Flock interference--which hasn't worked the
- several other times they've come in on Goldberg--won't work here either.
- He tries to walk out of the match (no countout, remember), but is met
- beyond the rail by several security guards pretending to be fans.
- On a quick side note, this is the third week in a row that Raven has had
- an encounter with "fans". The first incident was apparently real, but
- it's being reported that the second incident was actually Mortis minus
- his mask who attacked Raven. This week it was a well coordinated group of
- "fans" who pop up out of nowhere, pick Raven up and throw him back over
- the rail for Goldberg to get 'em. Give me a break! The crowd eats it up,
- though. The Flock, having had their morale broken, retake their seats in
- a quiet and orderly fashion. From there it's just a formality to spear
- and Jackhammer Raven for the win. Goldberg gets his 75th victory and the
- U.S. Title.
- Two quick questions:
- 1. Where was Saturn?
- 2. Are we going to have to wait another 75 weeks while WCW pushes
- Goldberg to his first World Title match?
- This was an exciting segment, but not a "good" match by any stretch of
- the imagination. Goldberg actually displayed less offense than most of
- his other recent matches, and as I noted above, his face-first smash into
- the chair was his most impressive move (yes, even more impressive than
- suplexing Reece). Take out the spots on the floor and the Flock
- interference and this was the usual Golberg quickie win. All last week I
- figured Goldberg would win, but by DQ due to interference by Saturn. Once
- Nitro kicked off and it sunk in that "Raven's Rules" would be in effect,
- there simply wasn't any way that Goldberg wasn't walking out with the
- title. "No DQ" matches are always done to give the title challenger a
- tremendous advantage, and by the virtue of Raven having it in every one
- of his matches, there's very little chance he can ever hold onto a title
- (unless his future opponents are more susceptible to attacks from the
- Flock). I sure hope WCW thinks about this before they give him another
- title.
- By the way, who did Goldberg ever beat to get a U.S. Title shot in the
- first place? I realize he was 74-0, but do that many squashes really make
- up for actually beating proven wrestlers? Must have been that win he got
- over Steve McMichael six months ago.
- Now we have to sit through an hour-and-a-half of junk until Hogan vs.
- Savage.
- - Nitro Girls.
- - LA PARKA vs. ULTIMO DRAGON
- With Goldberg's match out of the way it's time to talk about Hogan and
- Savage, which the announcers do for much of this match. La Parka does a
- risky dive off the top to the floor, but all we hear is comments about
- Bischoff and the NWO. The match actually then starts to pick up, which is
- as good a time as any to insert a dumb angle. Eddie Guerrero drags Chavo
- Guerrero, Jr. to the ring--apparently in an effort to fire him up and
- talk him into attacking Ultimo Dragon. The brow-beating works and Chavo
- pushes the dragon off the top (as Eddie distracts the ref). La Parka
- lands a spinning corkscrew moonsault and covers for the pin. Eddie slaps
- Chavo's face all the way back down the aisle.
- Are we really going to have to sit through ANOTHER month of this crap
- before Chavo snaps and slugs Eddie? This angle could have been greatly
- speeded up by having Chavo win his match against the Dragon at the PPV.
- Eddie could have then attacked Chavo, kicking off a match between the two
- at the NEXT PPV. We all know this is what it's leading up to anyway. As
- it is now, it looks like the split will happen at the next PPV, then the
- match between the two at the PPV after that! Either that, or WCW will
- just sort of lose interest and the angle will be forgotten (which happens
- half the time anyway). This angle maybe wouldn't even be so bad if it
- didn't involve Eddie NOT wrestling any matches! When was the last time he
- wrestled on Nitro? On Thunder? On PPV? That's the only way Chavo would
- ever realistically win a match between these two: Eddie will be too rusty
- when the match finally happens!
- - Bobby Heenan joins the announcing crew, replacing Zbyszco.
- - CHRIS BENOIT vs. CURT HENNIG (w/ Rick Rude)
- Benoit simply is not a well-liked man by the WCW higher-ups. We get the
- usual intensity from Benoit, but what's the point when his opponents suck
- and Benoit never wins any more (title match or not)? Rude sits in for
- commentary for a minute, then heads to the ring when it looks like Hennig
- could use some help. Rude interferes by dropping Benoit across the ring
- rail. Hennig takes Benoit's limp body and starts to apply the Hennig-
- Plex, but Benoit reverses it into the Crippler Crossface. Rude then nails
- Benoit from behind, stopping the match with a DQ. (Benoit wins. Yay.)
- Benoit is doubleteamed until Booker T. comes out. Benoit lets Booker know
- that he doesn't appreciate his "interference" and the two eventually come
- to blows. Let me guess ... ANOTHER PPV match between these two? What's
- the point? If Benoit wins the belt, it'll only be "about friggin' time!"
- On the other hand, if Benoit loses yet again: "Fool me once, shame on
- you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times--screw you WCW!!!"
- I wonder who Benoit hates more: Eric Bischoff, Terry Taylor or Kevin
- Sullivan?
- - After some clips from the PPV, "Mean" Gene interviews "Rowdy" Roddy
- Piper. Piper admits he dropped the ball at the PPV. Because of that, he's
- going to do some tinkering with tonight's main event. First, Piper says
- the match is "no DQ". Second, he says no one will run in the ring because
- Hogan has no friends. (Is that a stipulation or an observation?) Third,
- Piper says he's posting soldiers so that Hogan can't run out of the
- building. Fourth, Piper says that they will stay with the match no matter
- how long it takes.
- WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!?!?!
- First off, what did I just say above about "no DQ" matches favoring the
- challenger? This move on Piper's behalf all but assures that Savage will
- lose the title! Second, Hogan has his buddy the Disciple ... isn't that a
- friend who can run in to help him? Third, why would Hogan want to leave
- the arena? He wants to win the title, doesn't he? Fourth, how is
- committing to staying with the match anything new? Schiavone says this
- is what WCW always does to "please the fans" anyway. Add to that the fact
- that Savage is so busted up that the longer the match goes, the less
- chance he has to win. The only way Piper could have f***ed this match up
- any more for Savage would be to add "Savage is so tough that he'll fight
- with one hand tied behind his back!"
- - HAMMER vs. SATURN
- Again, where was Saturn during Raven's match. He shows up for a nothing
- match with Hammer, but is nowhere around when Raven's defending title?
- All these two do is punch, kick and choke each other. Both men are
- counted out while brawling on the floor.
- HOUR THREE Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan.
- - They show stills from the PPV again: the same stills they showed earlier.
- - PUBLIC ENEMY vs. BUFF BAGWELL/SCOTT STEINER
- The P.E. bring a table to the ring which not only has tape covering the
- saw cut on the bottom, but also has a little "X" target to show where to
- throw the opponent onto it on top. After some uninspired brawling and the
- usual botched attempt to put someone through the table, Bagwell gets the
- win with the Buff Blockbuster. (Scott had wanted to apply his Steiner
- Recliner for the win, but Buff talked him into letting him do the Buff
- Blockbuster). Both before and after the match Buff and Scott have a
- contest to see which one can act the gayest. P.E. tried to put Bagwell
- through the table, but Johnny Grunge only put him halfway on the table.
- Had the move worked, they'd have killed Bagwell. As it was, Bagwell moved
- easily in time and the two hoodies crashed through the plunder.
- - Nitro Girls.
- - PSYCHOSIS vs. BOOKER T.
- So-so match. Early on neither man does all that much, with the bout
- moving equally back-and-forth. Psychosis has a stint on offense, but
- Booker comes back and does his usual string of moves to earn the pinfall
- victory. Booker is getting some huge reactions from the crowds these
- days: mostly, I think, because he's won so many matches. He's starting to
- get some of that Goldberg-type reaction. ("He wins all the time, so he
- must be good, so I better cheer for him!")
- - BRIAN ADAMS (w/ Vincent) vs. LEX LUGER
- A non-typical Luger match. No, it wasn't that it was any good, he just
- didn't get beat up for the whole match like usual. Vincent tries to
- interfere and Luger Racks him. Konan runs in and Luger Racks him. He then
- catches Adams with a forearm and pins him.
- - They come back from the commercial. Schiavone talks about how great the
- PPV was. they inexplicably then take another commercial.
- - Buffer introduces Hogan. Hogan then gets on the mic and works the crowd.
- They take another commercial--during which they run a brief promo for the
- next WCW PPV: Slamboree. Savage makes his entrance after the break. All
- told they kill more than ten minutes since the last match ended.
- - "HOLLYWOOD" HOGAN vs. RANDY "MACHO MAN" SAVAGE
- Hogan delivers his usual low-aerobic performance, while Savage can barely
- walk with that bad knee of his. Hogan dominates the first half of the
- match, whipping Savage with his belt, working on his knee and so on.
- Savage then rallies back, whips Hogan with the belt, them amazingly
- enough goes up top for an elbowdrop, which connects. (I'd like to see
- Hogan give half this effort with a bad leg. Savage may have lost a lot
- over the years, but he's still a hell of a guy to go through with a match
- like this.) The shock of the landing is too much for Savage and he can't
- make the cover. Hogan then takes over, slapping on a Figure Four. (Whoa
- ... an actual logical procession of moves!) Hogan works on the knee for a
- bit. Both men then get up and trade choke holds. The ref tries to break
- it up (why?) but Savage tosses him away. Referee Nick Patrick comes up
- holding his back. Moments later the Disciple comes in and lays out
- Patrick with a Stunner (why?) The Disciple attacks Savage. (Didn't Piper
- say no one would/could help Hogan?) For the next minute or two they beat
- on Savage, working his knee over by banging it against the ring post. In
- an interesting move, the Disciple take the title belt, drapes it over his
- shoulder, then gives Savage a Stunner with it under his chin. Savage
- looks ripe for the picking, though the ref is still unconscious on the
- mat.
- Enter Kevin Nash to a thunderous crowd response. Nash gives Hogan a
- "whuzzup?" gesture. Suddenly he's tackled at the knees from behind by
- Eric Bischoff. This slows him up long enough for Hogan and the Disciple
- to lay into him. The Disciple holds him while Hogan winds up with the
- belt. Nash dodges, and it's the Disciple who takes the belt to the face.
- (Clang!) Nash then sets Hogan up for the Jacknife (big crowd roar), but
- Bischoff lays in some of those weak-ass karate kicks. Nash turns and
- nails Bischoff with a punch which didn't even muss Eric's hair. Nash
- Jackknife Hogan, receiving one of the loudest responses ever heard in a
- WCW arena. He then lays Savage on top of Hogan and heads over to pick up
- the ref.
- Here comes Bret Hart.
- What? Why?
- Bret Hart slides in the ring. Stopping just long enough to scoop up the
- World Title belt, he nails Nash with it, sending him to the canvas! Hart
- then grabs Hogan, rolls him over on top of Savage and drags the ref over
- to make the count. Three seconds later "Hollywood" Hogan has won the WCW
- World Heavyweight Title for the fourth time! The crowd is stunned.
- "Rowdy" Roddy Piper quickly scurries to the ring. Bret raises Hogan's
- hand in victory just before spotting Piper. "Why?" Piper starts asking
- Hart. Hart backs away from him, refusing to look him in the face. Piper
- persists, demanding to know what Hart has done and why. Piper asks one
- too many times and receives a punch to the face from Hart for his
- troubles. Just before the cameras wink off Hart gives the crowd that sly
- grin of his.
- The Hitman has returned.
- - This Wednesday: Nothing announced.
- - Next week: Nothing announced.
- Comments:
- Bret Hart is a heel. He's probably not NWO, but he's definitely not a
- "tweener" either. Don't try to convince me otherwise. Even if WCW says he
- isn't, he is. He's what the fans think he is and right now most fans hate
- him. How can you attack Nash, attack Piper, help Hogan win the title and
- still be considered anything but a heel? At best he's just trying to get the
- belt around Hogan's waist so that he can win it from him, in which case he's
- the biggest jerk in the world. After all his whining about how the WWF made
- him play a heel, what does he do? Turns heel. Either Hart or WCW finally
- realized that for all the bad feeling Hart had about it, he was very much
- over as a heel those final days in the WWF.
- Much like RAW last week, this was a fairly bad show which had a big finish.
- It's was filled with a lot of the usual stuff, though at least most of it
- was moving in new directions compared to the last month or so. (The Guerrero
- angle being the exception, as well as what's going on with Jericho.)
- Getting back to Hart, I'd say his turn is probably the second biggest angle
- so far in wrestling this year behind Mike Tyson. Even if it didn't make much
- sense, it was huge, and takes WCW in a direction completely different from
- where they were going just 24 hours earlier. Hart can now feud with Hogan,
- Nash, Savage, Piper--even Sting, and the fans will accept it. Of course Hart
- is now a guy that everyone hates. Sounds like a good time for him to have a
- Hart Foundation backing him up, doesn't it? The Bulldog and Neidhart weren't
- very over with the fans, so turning them heel with Hart would be easy.
- Rounding out the group, one has to admit that Chris Benoit has had a pretty
- bad attitude lately. Throw in Jimmy Hart as their manager and you'd have a
- pretty tough group which could go at it with both WCW and the NWO. Not very
- original but, hey ... I can dig it!
- Forgetting Hart for a moment, did anyone not see Hogan winning the belt
- again? I think we all knew it would happen, the only question was how big a
- fight was he and Nash going to get in after the match. Who would have
- thought it would be Bret Hart to come in and steal all the thunder?
- Speaking of which, Thunder--which is on Wednesday this week--will be huge.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- WWF RAW is WAR:
- Live/Taped: Taped 4/14.
- Length: Two Hours.
- Location: Long Island, New York.
- WWF RAW Hosted By: Jim Ross, Michael Cole and Kevin Kelly.
- - The show begins with a recap of what went down last week between "Stone
- Cold" Steve Austin, Vince McMahon and Dude Love.
- ~~~~~~
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- The Bottom Line:
- Ratings ...
- WCW Monday Nitro:
- Hour One: 5.2
- Hour Two: 5.0
- Hour Three: 5.1
- Composite Score: 5.1
- Final Quarter Hour: 6.5 (New Record)
- WWF RAW is WAR:
- Hour One: 4.3
- Hour Two: 4.4
- Composite: 4.4
- Final Quarter Hour: 3.6
- Combined rating for last fifteen minutes of both shows: 10.1 (New Record)
- As expected, the live Nitro versus the taped RAW won the ratings this week.
- Nitro, having hyped the show for the entire week before, as well as
- throughout the PPV the night before, managed to improve their ratings by
- eight-tenths of a full ratings point. RAW, delivering a sub-par taped show
- only dropped two-tenths of a point from last week. This is a huge win for
- WCW, but one that comes at a tremendous cost in certain respects. After all,
- they can't keep having the World Title change hands, Bill Goldberg win his
- "first" title, or have Bret Hart turn heel every week now, can they? They
- did literally everything they could and while it got them the win (something
- they were able to do easily for 83 straight head-to-head encounters before
- this), they only lowered RAW's ratings by two-tenths of a point. With Nitro
- now going on something of a ratings killing hiatus for the next four weeks,
- I doubt the WWF is all that upset about not winning this week.
- [Ratings courtesy 1Wrestling.com.]
- WCW has filed a $2 million lawsuit against Ric Flair for his no-showing
- upwards of five straight events he was scheduled to appear at. Rumors still
- persist that this may all be some kind of elaborate work. If so, I don't see
- what purpose it serves. How will WCW get any money out of it? How will they
- generate any fan interest since they haven't mentioned it on TV? The only
- fans who are even aware of this is that still small portion of fans who get
- "inside" information via the Internet or hotlines. Just as a generous
- estimate, there's maybe 100,000 wrestling fans who actually have such access
- and use it on a regular basis. That's only about half as many fans as there
- are those who buy wrestling PPV's, and is less than a 20th or 30th of the
- total number of fans who watch it on TV. This week from 10:45 PM Eastern to
- 11:00 PM there were over SEVEN MILLION viewers combined for both RAW and
- Nitro. Even if we went way overboard and suggested that there were a million
- wrestling fans who have regular access to "inside" info, that would still
- only constitute one seventh of all the people who watched wrestling at its
- peak this week. Does it make sense to run an angle which only serves to make
- you look bad and make the WWF look good: all to fool--generous estimate
- here--less than ten percent of all the fans? Many fans who are aware of this
- situation--perhaps most of these fans--are fairly upset with WCW. The fans
- who just watch on TV, on the other hand, have to be wondering where Flair is
- and if he will show up on RAW soon.
- And how do they come up with "$2 million" in regards to their lawsuit. They
- can't possibly be claiming Flair's absence cost them that much money, can
- they? $2 million is almost exactly what Flair was supposed to be paid by WCW
- over the next three years. Could a lawsuit for this amount essentially be a
- sign that Flair's affiliation with WCW has all but officially come to an
- end? I just can't see them winning a lawsuit for that amount AND still have
- Flair locked up under contract.
- Then the WWF comes along and complicates the story by mentioning Flair in
- relation to their PPV this Sunday. Obviously in all likelihood the WWF is
- just using this Flair situation to generate a few extra buys by dropping his
- name, thus starting the rumor that he's on the verge of making the jump:
- possibly at the PPV itself. I give it zero chance of happening myself, but
- the rumor is now out there and is making the rounds. The WWF shouldn't be
- commended for fueling the rumor, but WCW also deserves a lot of blame for
- stupidly allowing the situation to exist in the first place.
- Wouldn't it be interesting, though, if Flair and the WWF have come to some
- kind of clandestine agreement, and that the WWF feels they may be able to
- bring him in--regardless of any lawsuits floating around out there. If one
- accepts the notion that WCW winning the lawsuit would mean Flair was gone
- from the company, then the WWF agreeing to pay Flair a couple of million to
- pay off the lawsuit, as well as a few more million for his services over the
- next few years, well ... lets just say the WWF might be getting Flair
- relatively cheap. Of course this opens up a whole can of worms in terms of
- future litigation battles with WCW, not the least of which would be an
- accusation of collusion and/or tampering with a contract. Please don't take
- any of this as any kind of serious speculation: merely hypothetical musing.
- What makes all this so difficult to speculate on is what exactly is
- contained in the "letter of intent" Flair signed with WCW. No one besides
- Flair, his agent and WCW have any idea what this document says. It's wholly
- possible that Flair is locked up in WCW until 2001 under ironclad terms.
- It's also a possibility that the wording is such that Flair might have some
- kind of an out--or at least a set of terms not as explicitly lined out as
- would be in a standard contract of employment. Without knowing what Flair's
- obligations to WCW are/were, and what WCW's obligations to Flair are/were,
- as outlined by this letter, there's simply no speculation which can be
- either accurate--or out of the bounds of reason. We're all in the dark on
- this one. All that's known for sure is that Flair no-showed some events and
- WCW filed the lawsuit in court last Friday.
- No matter what the outcome, this whole situation is shaping up to deliver
- WCW one big black eye from a public relations standpoint. Barring a
- reconciliation between the two sides (which still doesn't seem to be out
- of the question), it looks like we won't be seeing Ric Flair for a long
- time. In laying the blame for this situation, most fingers are pointing
- squarely at one person: Eric Bischoff.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- This Week's Winner: Nitro.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1998 by
- John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those
- of "Internet Access, Inc". Check the "Slobberknocker Central" main page for
- info on how to receive the "Recap" free via E-Mail every week.
- Volume One, Number 127 of the "Monday Night Recap", April 20th, 1998.
- ~~~~~~
- Slobberknocker Central Monday Night Recap #126
- April 13th, 1998
- WCW Monday Nitro:
- Live/Taped: Live.
- Length: Three Hours.
- Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota.
- HOUR ONE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Larry Zbyszko.
- - "Rowdy" Roddy Piper's challenge to Hogan from last week is replayed. This
- would be significant because it makes us think we'll see these two fight
- tonight. Bear that in mind as the show progresses.
- - The Nitro Girls do a number in the ring. If I had to guess, I'd say a
- "number two". Yes, that's a poop joke. I'm mighty fond of them nowadays.
- The crowds here in Minnesota always embarrass me, and this one was no
- exception. ECW marks dominated the ringside area, as one fan wore a
- turban and held up an Al Snow head, while another had on a wrestling
- mask, pirate hat, and held up numerous unimaginative signs. Several fans
- in attendance believed that Bill Goldberg is their father. Many fans felt
- that (insert wrestler's name here) FEARS (insert other wrestler's name
- here; or "ME" or "SOAP"). I saw more signs with "3:16" on them than you'd
- see walking down the digital clock aisle in the afternoon at Wal-Mart.
- So many signs, so few brains.
- - FIT FINLAY vs. SCOTT STEINER (w/ Vincent)
- Vincent is carrying that trophy he's had for the last week or so. WCW
- won't bother to explain what it means, which makes it the only thing that
- passes for a mystery in WCW now that The Disciple's name has been
- revealed.
- An unremarkable opener, which saw the crowd mostly cheering for Steiner
- as loudly as they'd have cheered years ago for Verne Gagne vs. Nick
- Bockwinkle. Disgusting. The only thing of note to happen during the match
- was when Steiner dropped to the floor and had a brief verbal exchange
- with Larry "the Ax" Hennig--Curt Hennig's dad. (Which made no sense since
- Hennig is in the NWO. Would Hennig appreciate Steiner yelling at his
- dad?) Scott wins with the Steiner Recliner.
- Going to the break Bret "Hitman" Hart whines about how he's not going to
- whine about being screwed any more. He again whines about how he'll
- interfere whenever it looks like anyone in WCW is about to be screwed.
- - "Mean" Gene Okerlund hypes the hotline. Larry Zbyszko rattles off a ton
- of AWA wrestlers, as well as current WCW wrestlers who got their start in
- Minnesota. For some reason he doesn't mention Buck "Rock & Roll"
- Zumhopfe, "Jumping" Jim Brunzell or Charlie Norris: all of whom just
- wrestled here in my own hometown just last week. Curiously enough, Lenny
- Lane was scheduled to appear here also. Whether he did or not I don't
- know because, frankly, $12 was just too much to pay to see these guys in
- "action".
- - LENNY LANE vs. ULTIMO DRAGON
- The crowd was very unkind to Lane, giving him a "Lenny sucks!" chant at
- one point. The match itself was only interesting because Lane got in a
- fair amount of offense, which allowed him to play to the crowd (which,
- right on cue, gave him a big heel reaction). Ultimo Dragon overcame a
- number of flubbed moves to eventually earn the win with a Dragon Sleeper.
- Another video clip of Bret Hart whining.
- - Schiavone tosses it to the back, where "Mean" Gene is waiting to
- interview Roddy Piper. Piper announces that Nash and Hogan will face each
- other in a match here tonight. He then says he'll confront Hogan in the
- ring, with the intention of ridding the wrestling world of "Hollywood"
- Hogan once and for all.
- Piper is suddenly attacked by Hogan and the Disciple, who lays Piper out
- with a weak looking Stone Cold Stunner. Schiavone says medical attention
- is being given to Piper ... even though only about twenty seconds has
- passed.
- Of course we all know by now that this was pretaped--probably at last
- week's Nitro. Hogan, at nearly this exact moment, was in L.A. to tape an
- appearance on "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno". His people felt it was
- necessary to hype his new "3 Ninjas" movie. He needn't have bothered: the
- movie opened in 32nd or 33rd place over the weekend. To put that debut
- into perspective, you could show vacation slides in your own home, charge
- your family admission, and STILL make more money than this movie did!
- - Mean Gene interviews the Giant, who grunts his usual "chokeSLAM!" speech.
- - CHAVO GUERRERO, JR. vs. JOHNNY GRUNGE
- Chavo comes to the ring alone, revealing the fact that Eddie Guerrero
- wouldn't be on the show tonight. What's worse, Grunge wins this one by
- avoiding a Sunset Flip roll-up and sitting on Chavo for the pin.
- More comments from Bret Hart, this time whining about Hogan and Nash.
- (You know ... those two guys in WCW who are FAR more popular than he is.)
- - The Nitro Girls dance in bunny suits. Ask Gloria Steinem if this is
- "family entertainment".
- - Kevin Nash comes to the ring to deliver comments. He says he just saw his
- friend Hogan "run out the back door!" He compares the Piper beating to
- the "beating" which got George Michael in trouble last week. Nash then
- lets us all know that Randy Savage isn't in the building (wink, wink).
- Moving on, he claims he should have won the World Title last week. This
- brings Sting to the ring, where the champ extends the offer of another
- title shot to Nash. J.J. Dillon comes out as well and tries to keep the
- peace. Before all is said and done, Dillon makes a main event match
- between the two official. Sting adds that he's sick of hearing Nash whine
- about his powerbomb being illegal, and that it's fine with him if the
- move be made legal for the match. Dillon grudgingly agrees. The bit ends
- with the camera whirling away so as not to pick up Sting doing a Sean
- Waltman-esque crotch chop. Nash, seeing this, tells Dillon that Sting is
- "out of control!"
- There you have it: this week's main event will be ... the same as last
- week's. Huzzah!
- - CHRIS BENOIT vs. GLACIER
- Benoit wins with the Crippler Crossface. I don't think the match deserves
- any more comment than that.
- They then replay Buff Bagwell's challenge to Lex Luger from last
- Thursday. After the break they show another Thunder clip: this time of
- Eric Bischoff getting suplexed by Rick Steiner. Schiavone mentions Ric
- Flair's name for what may be the only time of the entire show.
- - Bagwell and Bischoff hit the ring. Bagwell gets a bit of spotlight time
- to do imitations of Luger and Rick Steiner. Bischoff then shows he's not
- really up on the current angles as he says the reason Hogan isn't in the
- building is because he was off doing the Leno show. Schiavone tries to
- cover by suggesting that Hogan hopped a lear jet to go out and do the
- show. Yeah, so he'd get there about, what, four hours after they finished
- taping the show and after it had already aired?
- HOUR TWO Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Zbyszko.
- - BUFF BAGWELL (w/ Eric Bischoff) vs. LEX LUGER
- Stall ... power move ... stall ... power move. Midway through the match
- Luger does a "happy dance" imitation of Bagwell which makes me feel
- embarrassed for the entire Pfohl family. Luger gets Bagwell in the
- Torture Rack, but is attacked by Bischoff (stopping the match). Luger
- actually sells one of Bischoff's kicks. Eric is then hoisted into the
- Rack, but is saved by a run-in from Scott Steiner. Steiner throws a punch
- which misses Luger by a full time zone, but is still enough to cause
- Luger to drop Bischoff. Rick Steiner eventually makes the save.
- More comments from Hart, this time advising Randy Savage to dump Hogan
- and Nash. I feel like asking Hart if he'd like some cheese with that
- whine?
- - Nitro Girls.
- - SUPER CALO vs. CHRIS JERICHO
- Jericho only makes a half-hearted grab for a "Jericho is Gay" sign, yet
- goes all out to tear up a "Jericho-holic 4 Life" sign. Hmmmm. Very
- telling. He then launches into a diatribe about how Super Calo is really
- "Prince Nakilaki" under the mask. The match itself is passably okay, with
- Jericho getting the win with the Lion Tamer (after Calo botches a forward
- headscissors roll-up off the top). Prince Iaukea cokes out to help Calo
- after the match.
- Bret Hart lets us know who he admires in WCW: guys like Chris Benoit, the
- Giant and Sting. What ties all these guys together is that they are all
- currently good guys, and none of them whine as loudly or as often as Bret
- Hart.
- - HAMMER vs. SATURN
- Kidman tries to break this one up, but gets tossed to the floor. Man, you
- have to be bad to get kicked out of the Flock! Saturn puts Hammer away
- with the Rings of Saturn.
- - ROCCO ROCK vs. GOLDBERG
- Rocco brings a table out with him. Sure enough, it gets used when
- Goldberg spears Rocco through it (Rocco having just set it up in the
- corner moments before). This was maybe the most entertaining of
- Goldberg's many squashes. After h gets the usual Jackhammer pin Saturn
- comes out for a confrontation. Raven appears and pulls Saturn to the
- back. The other Flock members get beat up by Goldberg anyway. Nothing new
- here.
- - Since three minutes of Goldberg apparently wasn't enough, they play a
- minute long video highlighting many of Goldberg's previous wins.
- HOUR THREE Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan.
- - Nitro Girls. Nitro Party Video.
- - YUJI NAGATA (w/ Sonny Onoo) vs. CURT HENNIG (w/ Rick Rude)
- Curt and Rick talk to their dads Larry and Dick at ringside. Hennig
- starts out in the match fired up, trying to look good in front of his old
- man. The match goes nowhere, however, as Rude freely interferes. Nagata
- is dragged over by the elder Hennig and Rood twice: the second time Larry
- removes his sweater to reveal a "Hennig Rules" shirt. Hennig gets the win
- with the Hennig-Plex. They then handcuff Nagata to the ropes. Jim "the
- Anvil" Neidhart runs out for the save, but the crowd has already lost
- interest by this time. So sad that Hennig can only get a moderate crowd
- reaction in his home state.
- - LA PARKA vs. BOOKER T.
- Almost a total squash, with Booker doing all his big moves on the way to
- the obvious win. Afterwards Chris Benoit comes out top stop La Parka from
- delivering a chairshot. Booker T. extends his hand, but Benoit shoves him
- down. The two stand nose-to-nose to the almost total indifference of the
- crowd. I'm not sure if the crowd has just burned themselves out cheering
- too much too early, or if it's really indicative of how bad the show's
- been up to now.
- - RAGE (w/ Chaos) vs. DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE
- This is Nitro? Is WCW seriously telling me that DDP vs. one half of High
- Voltage is a worthy match for the third hour? DDP takes three-and-a-half
- minutes to carry this one to it's foregone conclusion.
- Raven and the Flock then come out, with Raven again whining "what about
- me?" He stops in the aisle, allowing the Flock to reach the ring by
- themselves. Page does a plancha and knocks down three Flock members (the
- giant Reece, missed completely, still falls down anyway). Raven,
- meanwhile, is attacked from behind by ANOTHER FAN! Either he's
- legitimately become the most hated man in wrestling, or WCW is stupidly
- embarking on some kind of ongoing fan run-in angle.
- - KONAN (w/ Vincent) vs. RICK STEINER (w/ Ted DiBiase)
- Looking back at this time a few years from now, I think many fans are
- going to be of the opinion that Konan was among the most worthless
- wrestlers ever to occupy such a semi-prominent position on a wrestling
- promotion's roster. I realize he's a big deal in Mexico and all that, but
- frankly his entire stint in WCW has thus far resulted in very few matches
- of quality or any appreciable level of interest. He came in as a typical
- babyface and did nothing to distinguish himself, which forced the fans to
- very quickly lose interest in him. What was his solution, then? To turn
- heel and adopt a persona which drew upon racial stereotypes. Even then
- the effort he's given in his matches continued to decrease. How much of
- that is his fault and how much is the fault of the lockerroom climate of
- WCW is debatable. What is less debatable, though, is the fact that Konan
- could go away tomorrow and I doubt many people would miss him.
- In this match here Rick Steiner shows that as he's aged, he seems to have
- forgotten more than Konan apparently ever knew. Konan lets himself get
- beat up for awhile, applies one rest hold, then falls victim to a top
- rope bulldog (made possible because of Ted DiBiase, who prevents Vincent
- from knocking Steiner off the ropes). You all know I don't attribute
- ratings to matches (because they're too subjective from person to
- person), but this one would earn a "DUD" if one ever deserved it.
- - We get another look at the Randy Savage post-attack footage from last
- week. Haven't we reached the point where we can just assume Hogan did it
- and move on? This is followed by one of those dramatic video pieces
- touching upon all the highlights of the Hogan/Savage/Nash situation.
- - KEVIN NASH vs. STING
- Michael Buffer once again does the introductions.
- Nash again delivers a match which is better than anything he did in WCW
- in 1997, just as Sting continues to show that he's on the road back to
- where he was before his lengthy hiatus. Neither of these statements
- really say much, but it does all add up to a match which is easily the
- best and most interesting of the show. Sting gets in the early offense,
- with Nash then taking over for a short time. The match is very slow early
- on, which helps both keep from getting too winded. Both men were very
- over with the crowd, making it seem like everyone was rooting for both
- men equally. A series of near falls gets everyone on their feet midway
- through the match. The pace, unfortunately, alternates between pin
- attempts and rest holds, which keeps the crowd into it, but never really
- works them up to a frenzy. Sting stages a comeback and delivers a number
- of Stinger Splashes. At this point Randy Savage--with his arm in a cast--
- and Elizabeth make his way to the ring. Sting has Nash in a Scorpion
- Deathlock. Liz distracts the ref, allowing Savage to hit Sting in the
- back with a cast.
- Wait a minute. Savage hurt his leg. The fake injury they did last week
- was to his left shoulder and/or neck. Why is he wearing a cast on his
- right arm? Am I missing something?
- Anyway, Nash covers for a two and nine-tenths count. Nash then delivers a
- now legal powerbomb, which draws a tremendous reaction, but also a
- barrage of garbage in thrown in the ring. Nash covers for what is a sure
- pinfall ...
- ... when Bret Hart pulls the ref out of the ring. The amount of thrown
- trash increases. The bell rings as Hart lays into Nash, dropping him to
- the mat and maneuvering him into a Sharpshooter. The rest of the NWO runs
- in, but Hart has little trouble single-handedly fighting them all off.
- Nash slams Sting to the mat with another powerbomb and leaves. The show
- ends with a shot of Sting laid out amongst garbage in the ring.
- - This Thursday: Nothing announced.
- - Next week: Nothing announced.
- Comments:
- Pardon me, but did they switch from a live broadcast to a replay of last
- week's show when I wasn't looking? Worse than that, the show seemed to be
- pieced together from some of the least interesting matches on Nitro over the
- last few months, then all played together as if it were a live show. This
- show completely failed to generate any kind of surprises, much less real
- interest in the scheduled main event. More than that, it did a horrible job
- in hyping the PPV coming up this weekend.
- I'm assuming that Hogan's appearance on The Tonight Show was scheduled weeks
- or months ago, which is the only reason that Hogan didn't look into
- canceling his appearance. He needed to be in the arena tonight and wasn't.
- The pre-taped video segment did nothing to serve the live crowd, nor the
- home viewers. All it did was cheat the fans out of seeing him and Piper
- wrestle--even though both were promised for the show last week. Even the
- segment itself was used to set up some anticipation for a Hogan/Nash match,
- then a Hogan/Piper Nash: anticipation which was instantly killed by the
- attack. Explain this to me: Hogan nearly kills Savage last week, yet decides
- to stick around. This week he lays out Piper, suffers some kind of "guilt",
- "remorse" or "fear", and flees the building! What? How many times are we
- going to have to sit through Piper suffering serious beatings and hospital
- trips? Why couldn't he have come out later and trashed Hogan in an
- interview, then wrestled an NWO scrub. Clearly Piper was given the night
- off because of Hogan's absence.
- And what about Ric Flair? It's all over the Net now that Ric Flair has maybe
- been fired by WCW. Well, not really fired, maybe, but perhaps "suspended".
- Long story short, WCW claims Flair DIDN'T have permission to skip Thunder
- last week, and again did a no-show this week on Nitro. Plans for him to
- reform the Four Horsemen have supposedly been scrapped. Eric Bischoff called
- a lockerroom meeting and told anyone who would listen that Flair wasn't a
- "team player" and would be mad an "example of". (The last guy Bischoff made
- an "example of" was Syxx, if that tells you anything.) Now there are reports
- that Flair is talking to his lawyers, under the assumption that he has in
- fact been fired. We even have Konan saying on the WCW/NWO hotline that
- everyone in the company is under the impression that Flair has indeed been
- fired.
- Could it all be some kind of elaborate work? If so ... ERIC BISCHOFF IS A
- MORON! Working the smarts is one thing; doing so in such a way as to hurt
- the ratings of your OWN TV shows for several weeks is just plain stupid!
- Just last week WCW claimed, via Mark Madden, that the reason the WWF is
- doing so good in the ratings is because some fans are watching expecting
- Scott Hall and Flair to show up on RAW any day now. You know what? I said
- the same thing myself a good two or three weeks before WCW did. Obviously
- that's not the entire reason the WWF's ratings are up, but it's certainly
- something which has to be one the minds of a few fans--especially since
- Waltman waltzed back onto the Monday night stage. Most fans would be into
- any Bischoff vs. Flair angle the second they did it on TV. Why kill your own
- ratings just to work over a few jaded "smart" fans? It makes no sense. Even
- worse, any kind of Flair/Bischoff feud is going to draw obvious comparisons
- to the Austin/McMahon feud running strong in the WWF. It just makes sense
- for WCW to pull the trigger on this angle and start it immediately, or else
- push it off for a few months until after the WWF has finished their similar
- angle. In the meantime, why keep Flair off TV, allowing the "Flair jumps to
- the WWF!" rumors to stay alive? There are clearly problems between Flair and
- WCW here and it's their own handling of the situation which is making
- matters so bad for them, and so good for the WWF. How hard is it for WCW to
- send a camera crew to Flair's home and tape a generic, non-specific
- interview in which he vows to return soon and stick it to the NWO? They
- don't have to commit to any kind of angle, or tip their hand in regards to
- what they eventually have planned for him. Deliberately holding him back in
- order to build the surprise factor of an eventual return just hurts their
- own ratings, and helps those of the WWF.
- Of course with WCW on top of the ratings they don't even need to worry about
- such things, right?
- Right?!
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- WWF RAW is WAR:
- Live/Taped: Live.
- Length: Two Hours.
- Location: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
- WWF RAW Hosted By: Jim Ross, Michael Cole and Kevin Kelly.
- - The "over half-a-billion viewers" opening sequence has been replaced by
- a new video clip which features the WWF "Attitude" logo. What better way
- to begin a new era for the WWF.
- - Stone Cold Steve Austin heads into the ring. He quickly demands that
- Vince McMahon come out, or he'll hold the show "hostage" as he's done
- before. After a delay McMahon is shown peering out from behind the
- curtain. He eventually comes out, accompanied by Jerry Brisco, Pat
- Patterson and two policemen in riot gear. Once in the ring, Austin grills
- McMahon as to who his opponent will be at the "Unforgiven" PPV. McMahon
- says he hasn't made up his mind yet. Austin asks if that means he won't
- find out until the PPV itself. McMahon says he'll find out "soon".
- Austin moves on, accusing McMahon of hating him, and being disgusted over
- Austin's mannerisms and personal habits. He says that the more he looks
- at what Vince McMahon considers an appropriate WWF champion, that that
- image only fits one man: Vince McMahon himself. Austin asks McMahon if
- he'd like to be the WWF Champion. McMahon asks "where are you going with
- this?" Austin implies that before McMahon presented Austin with the new
- WWF Title belt, that he probably strutted around with it on his own waist
- at home in front of the mirror, adding that McMahon's own wife probably
- though he looked a bit stupid for doing so. The mention of his wife
- doesn't sit well with McMahon. Austin goes on to say that he intends to
- put the title on the line tonight in a match, and that there can be only
- one opponent: Vince McMahon himself! The crowd reaction is sheer frenzy.
- Without an answer from McMahon, Austin lays out two options for McMahon:
- the "easy way" or the "hard way". Echoing their encounter from a few
- weeks ago, McMahon asks what the "easy way" and "hard way" are? Austin
- says the easy way is for McMahon to go to the back and get whatever
- official he'd like--Austin doesn't care because, as he puts it, he could
- probably beat McMahon with one arm tied behind his back. The hard way?
- Austin drags a camera to the back and beats up McMahon wherever he is in
- the arena. Since McMahon has an ass whipping coming either way, it's up
- to him to chose. Austin adds that he's already beaten up McMahon's limo
- driver and flattened the tires, so McMahon can't go anywhere. (I guess
- McMahon never travels by cab.) Jim Ross sends us to the break highly
- incredulous that such a match could--should ever happen.
- - McMahon is in the lockerroom being counseled by Jerry Brisco and Pat
- Patterson. They advise him that Austin is making a fool of him and that
- he needs to stop it now or he'll never have any control in the WWF again.
- "I know you can do it!" exclaims Patterson. McMahon paces, pondering his
- decision.
- - THE DISCIPLES OF APOCALYPSE vs. LOS BORICUAS
- All the competitors are already in the ring when DeGeneration X comes
- out. This is a "Chain Match" and Los Boricuas are the "mystery team"
- which the WWF hyped over the weekend. How lame. This match is a "DUD" in
- its own right as nothing much happens. Hunter Hearst Helmsley Pedigrees
- DOA member Chainz on a steel chair, then on the entry ramp. There being
- no DQ stipulation in the match, and the ref being able to DQ one team
- over the other, he just throws the entire match out when D-X enters the
- ring. Jim Ross asks what D-X has against the DOA. You want a goofy
- theory? Here's mine:
- Remember back in 1995 when Skull and Eight-Ball (wrestling as either
- Jacob and Eli Blu or the Grimm Twins) were fired by the WWF because of an
- altercation they had with Shawn Michaels in the lockerroom? What if this
- whole D-X/DOA feud is supposed to make the "smart" fans think this is
- really a "Clique"/Harris Brothers feud? Furthermore, Chainz (Brian Lee)
- had a thing going against Rick Rude in ECW. Just maybe we're supposed to
- think that Rude got D-X to hate Chainz when he was part of the group
- (before leaving for WCW). "The enemy of my friend is also my enemy," or
- something like that. I said it was a goofy theory.
- Back in the ring Los Boricuas are celebrating with D-X. Before we get a
- chance to really ponder the horror of them joining the group, Chyna lays
- Savio and Jose out with low blows from behind. Pedigrees and chairshots
- follow.
- - Shane McMahon has joined in the conversation in the back, attempting to
- talk his father out of fighting Austin. "You don't think I can take him?"
- asks McMahon. Shane compares this match to a time when he was nearly
- killed speeding on a motorcycle. Brisco and Patterson say they know Vince
- and think he can beat Austin. Shane says that's a bunch of crap.
- Okay, this angle has officially reached the "compelling" level.
- - Vince McMahon makes the long walk to the ring alone. Delaying the start
- of the next match, he talks about how the WWF has been his "heritage",
- mentioning his grandfather, father and children. He says the WWF has
- "always been about honor and integrity: qualities sorely lacking in our
- current World Wrestling Federation Champion. Stone Cold Steve Austin has
- no honor. Stone Cold Steve Austin has no integrity. I know the decision
- I'm about to make here tonight would not sit that well with those that
- have preceded me. Nonetheless, sometimes a man's gotta do what a man's
- gotta do. And so in answer to the question 'will I fight Stone Cold Steve
- Austin in this ring tonight?' The answer is 'oh hell yeah!'" The crowd
- goes nuts, realizing that they will see the end of Vince McMahon in
- little more than an hour. Jim Ross begins complaining about McMahon's
- foolish decision. Patterson and Brisco come out to shake his hand and pat
- him on the back. Ross leaves the desk, vowing to use what little power he
- has in the company to stop the match from happening.
- - BRIAN CHRISTOPHER/SCOTT TAYLOR vs. AGUILA/PANTERA
- No match. The lights lower and out comes the Undertaker, who demolishes
- everyone but Christopher. The Undertaker calls out Kane, saying he will
- show him what evil is really about. He essentially challenges him to a
- match later in the show.
- - Kevin Kelly files a report from the back, setting up a clip taped during
- the commercial. Jim Ross is arguing with Patterson and Brisco that
- McMahon will get killed. Shane is on his side. McMahon himself stops
- pacing in the shower, comes out and orders Shane to get his gym bag from
- the car. Shane says this is the dumbest decision he's ever made.
- McMahon says it may well be. Ross makes his feelings known. McMahon
- orders him to go back out and do his job.
- - Tennessee Lee introduces Jeff Jarrett. Leaflets drop from the ceiling
- hyping Jarrett's appearance at the upcoming PPV, where he's scheduled to
- sing with the Sawyer Brown band. Bleah.
- - "DOUBLE J" JEFF JARRETT vs. TAKA MICHINOKU
- Steve Blackman deliver comments from the back regarding how he'll get his
- hands on Jarrett some day. The match itself never gets on track as Klub
- Kamikaze runs in and attacks Taka. The ref throws the match out. Jarrett
- slaps on a meaningless Figure Four afterward.
- - Steve Austin says he isn't surprised that McMahon accepted the match,
- since he'd be receiving a beating either way. He admits that the advice
- McMahon has taken from Patterson and Brisco is bad advice.
- - McMahon, dressed in workout gear, looks on as Patterson and Brisco show
- him how to counter the Stone Cold Stunner. Ross declares that the WWF
- will be torn apart when McMahon is hospitalized at the hands of Austin.
- - Faarooq, with new theme music, comes to the ring and calls out Rocky
- Maivia and the Nation of Domination. He says he'll give Rocky another
- chance to kick his ass. Rocky and the NOD come out to the stage. Maivia
- makes light of Faarooq's challenge, saying he'll lay the smack-down on
- Faarooq whenever he pleases. Rocky warns Faarooq to get ready for his
- beating. Faarooq gives him the old NOD salute. Rocky laughs, until he
- realizes that Steve Blackman and Ken Shamrock have come out behind him.
- They chase the Nation to the ring and a brawl ensues for the next few
- minutes.
- - Terry Funk--"Chainsaw" Charlie no more--comes to the ring. There he
- brings out his new tag team partner to replace Cactus Jack. He says his
- new partner is hardcore. Of all the guys rumored, 2 Cold Scorpio only
- turns out to be a minor disappointment. Funk says the WWF never gave
- Scorpio a serious chance, but that he would. The crowd reaction is mostly
- positive.
- - TERRY FUNK/2 COLD SCORPIO vs. THE QUEBECERS
- The crowd chants "ECW!" The match is quick, with 2 Cold getting the pin
- following a sweet looking 450 Splash.
- They immediately start the second hour.
- WWF WAR ZONE Hosted By: Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler.
- - Luna comes to the ring and calls out Sable. They cut away to the War Zone
- intro. Back to the action "Sable" comes to the ring. Yes, Goldust is at
- it again. Goldust poo-poo's over a house mic as Luna rips his evening
- dress off. The crowd gets a good laugh, but really reacts when the real
- Sable runs out. Sable and Luna go at it for a few moments, tearing some
- of each other's clothes.
- - Steve Austin is shown getting into his wrestling gear.
- - KEN SHAMROCK/STEVE BLACKMAN vs. THE MIDNIGHT EXPRESS (w/ Jim Cornette)
- Shamrock and Dan Severn, who is part of Cornette's group, share a brief
- stare-down before the ref sends Severn from the ringside area. We're
- obviously going to get a slow build for that one. As the match starts
- Ross complains about Bob Holly and Bart Gunn's nicknames, refusing to
- call them "Bombastic" and "Bodacious" any more. The match is very simple,
- going back-and-forth with little of note happening. After just a few
- minutes of action the ref calls for the bell, DQ'ing both teams for not
- listening to his instructions. We going to get any actual wrestling
- tonight?
- A quick shot of McMahon continuing his preparations.
- - Kevin Kelly gets a few comments from his boss in the back: "I'd be lying
- to you if I didn't tell you I've got butterflies in my stomach. But
- afraid? I proved I wasn't afraid of the United States government. I'm
- sure as hell not afraid of Ted Turner and Time/Warner. I'm not afraid of
- the big bad wolf. And I sure as hell am not afraid of Stone Cold Steve
- Austin!" The crowd can actually be heard popping for McMahon after the
- Turner remark. Commissioner Slaughter has joined Patterson and Brisco in
- cheering Vince on.
- - The Head Bangers are waiting in the ring for a match, but fall victim to
- another appearance by the Undertaker. One gets Tombstoned, while the
- other is chokeslammed. The lights go out again and Kane appears on the
- stage. Paul Bearer tells the Undertaker that he and Kane will fight, but
- that he'd have to wait until next week, and that the two would fight in
- the cemetery where the Undertaker's parents are buried. The crowd isn't
- too happy that the two wouldn't be fighting this week.
- They cut to the back, where Austin has begun making the journey through
- the hallways to the ring.
- - This week's Val Venis clip airs. Video distortion is needed to cover up
- some of the naughty bits of the naked women hanging around him.
- - D-X make their way to the ring, followed by Owen Hart. Owen challenges
- any member of the group to a match. Helmsley says they held a theme
- writing contest and that Billy Gunn was the one who won the privilege of
- facing Owen. Owen is backed up by LOD 2000 and Sunny. They cut away from
- the ring to a shot of McMahon pumping some iron as they head into the
- commercial break.
- - OWEN HART (w/ LOD 2000 & Sunny) vs. "MR. ASS" BILLY GUNN (w/ D-X)
- Owen and Gunn wrestle a solid match, only diminished slightly by the poor
- color commentary provided by Helmsley and X-Pac. The LOD keep the other
- D-X members from interfering. After at least ten minutes of action the
- match ends when Owen rolls up Gunn from behind for the pin (Gunn caught
- off guard because he was celebrating a powerslam he'd just performed).
- During the match Ross announces that there would be no more commercial
- breaks taken during the final fifteen minutes of the show. After the
- match they immediately cut to the back to a shot of McMahon making his
- way through the halls. McMahon, still possessing the lingering vestiges
- of a huge physique, swaggers to the ring. Ross asks who will run the WWF
- when McMahon is injured, then exclaims that he just bought a new house
- and how would he pay off the mortgage if McMahon's demise shuts the
- company down. Shane comes to the ring and tries one last time to talk his
- father out of it, but is gently steered from the ring by McMahon and his
- handlers. Ross, forgetting that 54 year old Terry Funk held a title just
- a few weeks ago, says the WWF isn't the company that has senior citizens
- as their champions.
- Steve Austin comes to the ring. In the process of going from corner to
- corner he bumps into McMahon. The ref takes the World Title belt and
- holds it up in the air. McMahon takes the belt and holds it to his waist,
- showing what it would look like there.
- - "STONE COLD" STEVE AUSTIN vs. VINCE MCMAHON
- The ref brings the two together in the middle of the ring. Austin gives a
- smirk to the crowd: a smirk which is wiped off his face by a slap from
- McMahon. The two separate and are close to locking up, when McMahon gets
- a microphone from Slaughter and reminds Austin about his boast that he
- could beat McMahon "with one arm tied behind your back!" Austin give a
- "yeah, but ... " look, but McMahon taunts him. "You got any guts? Are you
- a man of your word?" Austin agrees and extends his left arm. "Oh no,"
- says McMahon, "the Stunner arm!" Jerry Brisco ties Austin's right arm
- behind his back, with McMahon exhorting him to "cinch it up, Jerry, cinch
- it up!" After his arm is tied down Austin asks the crowd if they think he
- can still beat McMahon with one arm tied behind his back? "Oh, hell
- yeah!" McMahon then asks if they think HE can beat Austin with one arm
- tied behind Austin's back? "Oh, hell NO!!!" Just priceless. McMahon
- stalls a bit further by getting a last moment rub-down from Slaughter and
- Brisco. The final icing on the cake is Brisco inserting a mouthpiece so
- that Vince can protect his teeth. With everyone cleared from the ring,
- Austin and McMahon stand ready in opposite corners to start the most
- momentous Heavyweight Title match in the history of the World Wrestling
- Federation.
- Then Dude Love's music starts to play ...
- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
- Dude Love comes out and asks if everyone can't just get along? He
- launches into a monologue about how he and Austin are tight (they were
- WWF Tag Team Champions for a brief time), but that McMahon is the one who
- signs the Dude's paychecks. Dude says he's vetoing this match. McMahon,
- fed up with Mick Foley's antics (or so it seems), shoves him down from
- behind. Dude gets up, declaring that McMahon made a big mistake, and goes
- after him with the Mandible Claw! Before he can get it slapped on Austin
- intervenes. Dude then slaps the claw on Austin, taking him down to the
- mat. McMahon, seeing that there'll be no match, exits the ring, where
- Shane and the others herd him away from the ring. Dude asks McMahon if
- he'd like a piece and McMahon has to be held back from entering the ring.
- Austin tries to fight Foley off, but he still has one arm tied behind his
- back. Dude sends him into a guard rail down on the floor, then dumps him
- on top of the announcer's desk. A cameraman is wiped out in all the
- chaos. Dude perches on top of Austin, pounding on him as the show fades
- off the air.
- - Next week: Undertaker vs. Kane.
- Comments:
- For nearly two hours the WWF engaged in one of the most riveting, compelling
- storylines ever. At the last moment they swerved everyone and pulled a
- bait-and-switch which resulted in little more than a standard heel turn and
- establishing the championship contender for the next PPV. I understand why
- they did it, and taken as a whole it was a reasonable way to build up Foley
- as Austin's next challenger. Still, I'd much, MUCH rather have seen the
- match take place, as well as all the intriguing possibilities that could
- have resulted from that. The eventual outcome heavily overshadows the
- tremendous job done building up to the point, though I'm sure most people
- (myself included) are most upset because, for just a moment, the WWF
- suckered us into really believing the match was going to take place. We all
- should have known better but, dammit, the WWF did it to us again!
- Setting aside the storyline for a moment, which carried through the entire
- show like no other angle I can think of offhand, this was, wrestling-wise,
- one of the weakest shows in memory. With the exception of the Owen/Gunn
- match, every other match on the card was either a squash, meaningless, or
- for some reason didn't take place. They also again set up a number of
- mystery surprises which didn't pay off, though as usual the fault there lies
- both with the vague hype machine of the WWF, as well as the wishful thinking
- of the fans. (No Abdullah the Butcher, no Pit Bulls, etc.)
- Had the Austin/McMahon angle not been so masterfully executed this would
- actually have gone down as a pretty bad installment of RAW. As it is,
- though, it is the incredible execution of the angle which saved the show,
- and makes it one of the most memorable ever.
- I wonder if they might have done it differently had they realized fully what
- the fan reaction would be like. I think the one thing no one really counted
- on was how many fans McMahon himself seemed to win over just before the
- appearance of Dude Love. I think McMahon, if anything, had earned a lot of
- respect from the fans for what he was doing. Of course most just wanted to
- see him stretchered out. Still, had the match actually taken place and
- McMahon had given a good accounting for himself, he just may have received
- a decent reaction. With the way things went down, though, I'm not sure how
- much of the "good will" he generated will last. One has to admit, though,
- that doing it this way he and the WWF ducked a lot of criticism that would
- have been leveled at him from his long-time critics in regards to putting
- himself over, his ego, and so on. Of course those same critics will now
- complain about the swerve finish, so it was a no-win situation no matter
- what he did in the eyes of those fans.
- To echo the sentiment being voiced by many across the Internet: "oh what
- might have been!"
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- The Bottom Line:
- Ratings ...
- Nitro: 4.3 (Hour One: 4.4 / Hour Two: 4.2 / Hour Three: 4.4)
- RAW: 4.6 (Hour One: 4.3 / Hour Two: 4.9)
- Final Quarter Hour: Nitro: 4.3 / RAW: 6.0 (All-time record.)
- If you've checked out some of the wrestling news sites, you've undoubtedly
- heard that RAW has finally beaten Nitro in the ratings, ending Nitro's
- winning streak at 83 weeks. This one win certainly won't diminish what WCW
- accomplished during that streak, as Nitro truly did deserve to win on many
- of those occasions. What this win does do, however, is justify to many WWF
- fans their support of the promotion, and their claims that the WWF, while
- not always the better of the two groups, was still deserving of some respect
- for the quality product they often delivered. The WWF, and their fans, knew
- that they couldn't win in a straight-up comparison of "big names", "quality"
- wrestlers, or even in a comparison of money spent on production values. For
- the last year-and-a-half the WWF has had to rely on innovation, originality,
- some in-your-face shock value, and an overall superior ability to tell a
- story in the ring. Not everything they've done has worked, and they've had
- to endure some rocky times because of it, but in the end it has all served
- to galvanize the support among the fans, as well as generate new ones and
- attract WCW fans through their efforts. It's been a controversial approach:
- abandoning the image of "sports entertainment" and foregoing the once very
- lucrative children's market in favor of a more mature audience demographic.
- They've had to endure talent injuries, roster defections, network tensions,
- and a general sense of unease, unrest and distrust in the lockerroom.
- What they've also done--to some extent--is prove me wrong. I never really
- thought the WWF could win a ratings battle again without WCW simultaneously
- suffering a serious slip of their own. Some may argue that that's precisely
- what did happen. In a minor way I'd agree, but not to the extent to which I
- thought would be necessary for Nitro to lose on a Monday night. How much of
- this win was sheer novelty value and hype on behalf of the WWF, and how much
- of it was a feeling on behalf of WCW fans that Nitro simply got boring and
- repetitive ... well, there's no real way to know which was the deciding
- factor. Next week's ratings will again be interesting because it would tend
- to show which of the above two phenomena was at work this week. If RAW is
- anywhere close to Nitro in the ratings, it'll prove that this comeback of
- theirs is for real. I fully expect Nitro to win again next week, and for
- many of the weeks after that. However, from here on out the ratings war
- could go either way, and "business as usual" may no longer be enough to
- ensure a ratings win for Nitro.
- And on that subject for a moment, WCW has no one to blame but themselves.
- They knew what was at stake this week. Sure, they'll downplay this loss like
- crazy, but let's face some facts: aside from the ratings, WCW doesn't have
- much of a lead on the WWF when it comes to any statistical or financial
- data. House show attendance and earnings are booming for both, PPV buyrates
- are close (with WrestleMania's buyrate zeroing in on a 2.2 or 2.3), the WWF
- apparently leads in merchandise sales, as well as all foreign revenues. With
- "who's better?" being a debatable topic with no solid winner or loser given
- the differing tastes of the fans, all WCW really has to validate their claim
- that they're "number one" is the TV ratings.
- For at least one week the WWF gets to borrow that title from them. For at
- least one week the numbers bear out what many WWF fans have felt for a long
- time: that quality matters and that the WWF--like them or not--just may be
- the "better" of the two promotions on occasion. The ratings may not be the
- final word on the subject, and they may not prove anything as far as either
- side goes, but for one week they serve as a validation and vindication of
- the WWF and their fans. For one week, and perhaps many more to come after
- that, the WWF is once again in the game on Monday nights.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- This Week's Winner: RAW.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1998 by
- John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those
- of "Internet Access, Inc". Check the "Slobberknocker Central" main page for
- info on how to receive the "Recap" free via E-Mail every week.
- Volume One, Number 126 of the "Monday Night Recap", April 13th, 1998.
- ~~~
- Slobberknocker Central Monday Night Recap #124
- March 30th, 1998
- WCW Monday Nitro:
- Live/Taped: Live.
- Length: Three Hours.
- Location: Chicago, IL.
- HOUR ONE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Larry Zbyszko.
- - They show a clip of Kevin Nash's comments to "Hollywood" Hogan last
- Thursday on Thunder.
- - Nitro Girls. A little more of what happened between Hogan and Nash on
- Thunder is then shown.
- - HIGH VOLTAGE vs. WAYNE BLOOM/MIKE ENOS
- After just a couple of minutes of action the Giant comes to the ring and
- chokeslams everyone. (I really liked this ... when I first saw it in ECW
- three years ago.) The Giant accepts Roddy Piper's offer to be his partner
- in the "Baseball Bat Match" against Hogan and Nash at Spring Stampede.
- - Mean Gene Okerlund interviews "Rowdy" Roddy Piper (with the Giant
- hovering around in the background). Piper makes a few announcements.
- First, Kevin Nash must face Sting and Lex Luger tonight, and he can
- choose anyone as his partner except Hogan. Second, he reveals that
- Hogan's new sidekick is really Brutus Beefcake, and that his real name is
- "E. Harrison Leslie". Finally, he announces a match between himself and
- Hogan for later in the show.
- - They again show a clip of the confrontation between Hogan and Nash.
- - SATURN (w/ the Flock) vs. FIT FINLAY
- Saturn wins with the Rings of Saturn in what was a decent match.
- - Mean Gene hypes the hotline.
- - Hogan and the NWO assemble in the ring. Hogan tells us that Brutus
- Beefcake is "The Disciple", and that he represents all us NWO-ites who
- worship him. Hogan then says that none of the other NWO members will team
- with Nash for his match. Nash comes out and, quoting Randy Savage, says
- all those guys behind Hogan may be waiting to stab him in the back. Nash
- then says he already has a partner picked out. (Supposedly a big mystery,
- though his mention of Savage pretty much gives it away.)
- Tony Schiavone reminds us that Thunder won't be on TBS this week. Atlanta
- Braves Baseball makes its return, preempting the show for the first of
- many times (until Thunder makes the move to Wednesday nights, as has been
- expected for some time). WCW will offer live RealAudio coverage of their
- "Malice in the Palace" house show that night in Tampa, Florida instead.
- Check out WCW's website for details.
- - Nitro Girls.
- - CHRIS JERICHO vs. MARTY JANNETTY
- Jericho rags on Dean Malenko before the match. Jannetty taps out in the
- Lion Tamer in about a minute. Jericho then says with his remaining time
- he'll list all 1,004 holds he knows (saying Malenko only knows about 60).
- He has a huge stack of computer paper and begins reading off all the
- holds one at a time. WCW cuts to a commercial. When they return he is
- still reading off the list, but is interrupted by Prince Iaukea.
- - PRINCE IAUKEA vs. GLACIER
- Iaukea wins with the Northern Lights Suplex.
- HOUR TWO Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Zbyszko.
- - Nitro Girls. Nitro Party Video.
- - JUVENTUD GUERRERA vs. EL DANDY
- Guerrera gets the easy win with the Juvi Driver.
- - In what I assume was a bit of corporate sponsorship, they show the full
- trailer for the "Lost in Space" movie coming out soon. New Line Cinema
- ... Doesn't Ted Turner own that company?
- - CHAVO GUERRERO, JR. vs. KAZ HAYASHI
- Hayashi looked better here than in his other Nitro appearance (I think
- ... they all sort of blur together after awhile). Chavo wins with a
- spinning DDT off the turnbuckles. Good match.
- - Raven hops the rail, grabs a mic and tells us his sob story. He accuses
- Diamond Dallas page of betraying him by not getting WCW to hire him. In
- case you haven't picked up all the subtext in this, Raven is claiming
- that both he and DDP were trained by Jake "the Snake" Roberts, and that
- it's because of DDP that he got stuck in ECW.
- - RAVEN vs. BUFF BAGWELL (w/ Scott Norton)
- Before you can even figure out why this match is happening in the first
- place, DDP runs out-chasing Raven from the ring and completely out of the
- arena through the crowd. Page then takes a seat at the desk and tells us
- just how rough his own life has been, and that Raven's woes are just a
- joke. This story would have worked better if DDP accused Raven of burning
- down his home. Wearing a mask would just help Raven in general.
- - DISCO INFERNO vs. BILLY KIDMAN
- With the push these two guys have had lately, I wasn't sure who would
- win. They end up wrestling a very good match which Disco wins, pinning
- Kidman after a spike Piledriver.
- HOUR THREE Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan.
- - CURT HENNIG (w/ Rick Rude) vs. JIM "THE ANVIL" NEIDHART
- Rude takes a seat at the announcer's desk. Nothing match. Neidhart easily
- dominates Hennig-all the while calling for Rude to come to the ring.
- Hennig puts up little opposition and after a couple of minutes, just when
- Neidhart is about to win, Rude finally does run into the ring. He takes
- out the ref, then beats on the Anvil. Davey Boy Smith runs out to make
- the save, but he is taken out by Brian Adams moments later. Eventually
- Bret Hart has to come out to save his relatives. After the NWO has run
- off Hart whines about being screwed again, then vows to do the same to
- Hogan and the NWO.
- - CHRIS BENOIT vs. BOOKER T.
- Another good match between these two, with the result being the same as
- the last time: time limit draw.
- - Nitro Girls.
- - ULTIMO DRAGON vs. PSYCHOSIS
- A promising match which doesn't get the chance to go anywhere. Kidman and
- the Flock run in to get revenge for Psychosis injuring Lodi. The Dragon
- actually helps Psychosis fight them off.
- - GOLDBERG vs. RAY TRAYLOR
- A longer than usual match, but this time Goldberg has nothing to work
- with and doesn't end up looking too impressive. Strong ... yes, intense
- ... certainly, but not really impressive. He no-sells Traylor's offense,
- and wins in the usual fashion. Win #67 according to Tenay. Goldberg then
- taunts Saturn, who is sitting at ringside. Saturn has to be held back
- from entering the ring.
- - KEVIN NASH/RANDY "MACHO MAN" SAVAGE vs. LEX LUGER/STING
- They try to stretch out the suspense, even after Savage has already come
- out. The match is every bit as bad as you'd expect, with the usual NWO
- run-in affecting the finish. Luger hoists Nash into the Torture Rack, but
- the Disciple runs in and whonks him. He rolls Nash onto him and the ref,
- distracted by Hogan during this, makes the three count. Fan sentiment is
- expressed by a fully loaded drink cup which lands on Luger's groin just
- before the pin.
- Roddy Piper then comes out and begins to brawl with Hogan.
- - "ROWDY" RODDY PIPER vs. "HOLLYWOOD" HOGAN
- Hogan takes a tumble down the ramp, looking roughly about 70 years old in
- the process. Almost the entire match consists of brawling on the floor
- mixed with fat old potato punches which land with less force than that
- which is mustered by your grandma swatting a fly. the match is put out of
- its misery when the Disciple runs in. More drink cups start to fill the
- ring. Security can be seen scrambling to eject the guilty parties.
- Kevin Nash then comes to the ring for no appreciable reason. He picks up
- Piper to hold for Hogan. Hogan winds up a big running punch, but Piper
- ducks and Nash is nailed instead. Hogan and Nash get into a shoving
- match, which is broken up by the arrival of the Giant. The show ends with
- Hogan and Nash muttering threats at each other.
- - This Thursday: Thunder won't be on.
- - Next week: Nothing announced.
- Comments:
- A fair amount of quality wrestling, but all of it came as part of matches
- which mean very little in the greater scheme of things. Each match seemed to
- feature a pushed wrestler who will go on to face another pushed wrestler
- appearing in a match tonight at the next PPV. I'm glad we're getting to see
- some okay matches, but do we need to sit through seven hours per week of
- what is essentially bulked up squashes? Add in the fact that the PPV's for
- WCW over the last half year have offered very few storyline payoffs, we're
- stuck tuning in over and over to see some good wrestling overshadowed by
- angles which resolve themselves at glacier-like paces.
- Remember the old saying about a frog in a pan of water? Put it in hot water
- and it'll jump out ... put it on cold water, turn up the heat slowly, and
- it'll cook. That's kind of the way things work in WCW. Things never seem to
- change from week to week. After about three or four months, though, things
- have finally moved on a bit. The change, however, is slight even when you
- compare it to things done months earlier.
- I've said it before: I'm just not that much a fan of wrestling in general
- nor WCW in particular to have a handful of good matches be my ONLY
- motivation to tune in one, two or three times a week. I like good matches,
- but it takes the overall product in terms of storyline, interviews and the
- matches themselves to make me WANT to watch on a regular basis. This is why
- the WWF wins me over so much more often. Even when the match quality lets me
- down, it's the storylines and such which keep me coming back. The WWF
- actually GIVES me a reason to tune in every week. With WCW it's "well, tune
- in this week or you'll miss a two-and-a-half star match between Ultimo
- Dragon and Eddie Guerrero." In all other respects there's no reason to watch
- more than, say ... once a month. You might miss some okay matches if you did
- that, but I doubt any of them would have been "must see"-and you certainly
- wouldn't have missed much in the way of angle progression, interviews,
- surprises and so on.
- Maybe I should just quit watching Thunder.
- There's also the matter of WCW's big name stars. Given how poorly the top
- stars actually wrestle, and how long it takes for anything to happen, all
- many fans are being asked to do is just tune in to SEE their "favorite"
- stars in action. I guess if you truly are a "Hollywood" Hogan fan, and you
- like his interviews, and the very act of tuning in to see him pretend to
- wrestle makes you happy, then I guess more power to you. That's not the type
- of fan I am, though. I like to know that the wrestlers I enjoy seeing are
- going to actually do something worth my time. WCW seems to hold it over our
- heads that it's our "privilege" to see these stars-like we should be
- grateful to them for providing said stars. Actually delivering a worthy
- performance is secondary, if not non-existent. Hulk Hogan doesn't have to
- wrestle a good match because he IS Hulk Hogan, and just seeing him is "good
- enough". Bret Hart doesn't have to give a good interview because he IS Bret
- Hart, which is plenty "good enough" for us lowly fans. WCW figures just
- having all these stars under lock and key is "good enough" and no effort
- beyond that on their part or the wrestlers parts is required.
- All the talent in the world is no good if nothing is done with it. That's
- how I see it, anyway.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- WWF RAW is WAR:
- Live/Taped: Live.
- Length: Two Hours.
- Location: Albany, NY.
- WWF RAW Hosted By: Jim Ross, Michael Cole and Kevin Kelly.
- - Video highlighting many of the memorable moments from WrestleMania is
- shown.
- - WWF head honcho Vince McMahon makes his way to the ring amidst a chorus
- of boos. He has a brand spanking new WWF World Heavyweight Title belt
- draped over his shoulder. McMahon, after requesting the crowd quiet down
- a bit, asks us to give it up for the champ ...
- *KEE-RASH!*
- Austin, once he hits the ring, eyes the new belt, throws his down and
- grabs the new belt away from McMahon. After Austin basks in the glow of
- the crowd for a bit, McMahon offers him an apology over what he'd said
- about him in recent weeks. He says he's proud of Austin winning the title
- and that together, with Vince's guidance, the two can perhaps mold Austin
- into the greatest WWF Champion ever.
- Austin tells McMahon he's full of it: that he knows for a fact that
- McMahon hates him. McMahon says he's incapable of hate. He says he loves
- him, and that he's a hell of a guy and ...
- "Hold it!" says Stone Cold. "You what ... ?" McMahon fumbles over
- himself, saying that "I love you" is just a figure of speech. Austin says
- he loves Vince too, but that now that they have all the b.s. out of the
- way, he vows to continue raising as much hell in the WWF as he can.
- "Well," offers McMahon, "we can do this the easy way, or the hard way."
- Austin asks him to define what "easy" and "hard" means. McMahon says
- "easy" means being flexible and, essentially, doing what McMahon says.
- "Hard" means McMahon will force Austin to mold to his wishes. Austin asks
- if he can think it over for a few seconds. He gives the crowd a knowing
- look, kicks McMahon in the gut and lays him out with the Stone Cold
- Stunner! Austin asks for a "oh, hell yeah!" from the crowd if they
- approve.
- They do.
- Back from the commercial they replay the Stunner, along with footage of
- McMahon-holding his neck-being helped from the ring. In the back McMahon
- is shown consulting with his underlings.
- - LEGION OF DOOM vs. LOS BORICUAS (Jesus & Jose)
- Sunny brings her new-look Legion of Doom team to the ring. There she says
- they will from now on be known as "LOD 2000". In less time than it takes
- to say "Bill Goldberg" they squash their opponents, taking one of them
- out with the Doomsday Device.
- In an update from the back, Kevin Kelly announces that McMahon has called
- the local police.
- - After another replay of the Stunner, Kevin Kelly reiterates that the
- police have been called, adding that Steve Austin told him that McMahon
- doesn't have the balls to have Austin arrested.
- - KURRGAN (w/ the Jackyl) vs. CHAINZ
- Kurrgan gets a quick win with the Iron Claw. During the match they cut to
- the back to show McMahon pacing-waiting for the police to arrive. Kurrgan
- drags Chainz up the ramp by the forehead Claw, following after the Jackyl
- like a big puppy.
- An unmarked police car pulls up in the back just as they go to break.
- When they return McMahon is leading several policemen to Austin's
- dressing room.
- - Tennessee Lee introduces "Double J" Jeff Jarrett, who once again rides
- the neon-covered horse to the ring.
- - "DOUBLE J" JEFF JARRETT (w/ Tennessee Lee) vs. AGUILA
- Lee, sitting in for color commentary, promises he'll have a big surprise
- next week. Aguila gets in a few moves, but Jarrett has little trouble
- getting the quick win over him with the Figure Four. After the match
- Steve Blackman runs out and tries to beat on Jarrett, but Jarrett manages
- to get away relatively unscathed.
- McMahon looks on in the back as the police are leading Austin away in
- cuffs. Austin takes a shot at McMahon, slamming him against a row of
- lockers as he passes. McMahon lets out an expletive, telling Austin he's
- going where he belongs. Austin vows that "your ass is mine!" for what
- he's done.
- - The arrest is replayed, this time showing Austin being led to the police
- car and stuffed in the back seat. Cut to a live shot of McMahon and his
- stooges coming to the ring. The crowd boos him unmercifully. McMahon gets
- on the mic and says he didn't want to have to do that, but that Austin
- selected his choice, and "dammit I selected MINE!"
- RAW ends several minutes early, promising a major announcement from
- DeGeneration X, as well as a Steel Cage Match to decide who will win the
- held-up WWF World Tag Team Titles. Rocky Maivia, holding a new
- Intercontinental Title belt, also has a few choice words for Ken
- Shamrock. All this yet to come in the War Zone.
- What a show!
- WWF WAR ZONE Hosted By: Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler.
- - ROCKY MAIVIA/FAAROOQ vs. KEN SHAMROCK/"LETHAL WEAPON" STEVE BLACKMAN
- What action we do see is okay, but the match never develops into much of
- anything, as Rocky refuses to tag in and walks out on Faarooq. Faarooq
- falls victim to a belly-to-belly suplex at the hands of Shamrock. After
- the pinfall Faarooq calls Rocky back out, saying he'll make him wear an
- ass whooping. Rocky comes out and the two brawl, with the other Nation
- members splitting the two apart. Rocky walks out again, turns when
- Faarooq calls him again, raises an eyebrow as a signal, and looks on as
- D-Lo, Kama and Mark Henry attack Faarooq from behind! Just like that
- Faarooq is out of the NOD. Finally! The Rock declares himself the new
- "ruler" of the Nation.
- - Pete Rose being Tombstoned by Kane is the "Slam of the Week".
- - Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Chyna head to the ring. Hunter accuses Shawn
- Michaels of dropping the ball in regards to making sure Mike Tyson was
- really a member of D-X. Hunter says he's picked up the ball and will make
- the decisions for D-X from now on. Calling tonight the "Genesis of D-X",
- he says he'll form an army to take care of business. When you start an
- army, he says, you first look to your buddies ... your friends ... the
- Kliq!
- Sean Waltman enters the arena! A huge chunk of the crowd goes wild.
- Waltman-apparently now dubbed "the Kid"-starts into a shoot-style speech,
- taking shots at Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff. (A full transcript of this
- is available at several of the big wrestling sites out there.) He says
- Hogan sucks, that Bischoff's head would go up Hogan's ass if Hogan
- "stopped short", and that Scott Hall and Kevin Nash are being held
- hostage by WCW, otherwise they'd come back to the WWF. He and Hunter wrap
- the segment up with a "suck it!" and some crotch chops.
- - In the only real down moment of the night, the WWF shows a video of a new
- superstar making his way to the WWF: Val Venis-the porn star. Venis is
- the much ballyhooed rookie Sean Morley. He's supposedly pretty good.
- He'll need to be to overcome this gimmick. Venis does a mildly amusing
- interview from a bed while watching a porno movie (which we can't see,
- but we can hear).
- - MARC MERO (w/ Sable) vs. TAKA MICHINOKU
- Before the match can start Luna appears and challenges Sable to a
- rematch. Sable immediately accepts. Luna says she wants an "Evening Gown
- Match", which is essentially a "Tuxedo Match". (The loser is the one
- stripped down to their underwear.) Even though Mero protests, Sable
- indicates that she accepts the challenge.
- Mero gets an easy win over the Light Heavyweight champ, putting him away
- with the TKO. After Mero and Sable have left Taka is attacked by three
- Japanese guys who jump out of the crowd. (Michinoku Pro stars Shoichi
- Funaki, Mens Teioh and Dick Togo.) Taka is powerbombed and butt-splashed
- off the top. Jim Ross yells "who are these guys!" as they run away
- through the crowd. Yowza ... the Light Heavyweight Division just
- quadrupled in size!
- - THE NEW MIDNIGHT EXPRESS (w/ Jim Cornette) vs. THE HEAD BANGERS
- As the match starts Dan "the Beast" Severn makes his way to the ring!
- Cornette runs down Severn's many accolades, including his collegiate
- wrestling record and UFC background. Cornette mentions that Severn has
- beaten Shamrock in the UFC, (Ross pointing out that Shamrock himself also
- beat Severn on one occasion). Severn's NWO World Heavyweight Title is
- mentioned.
- The Midnight Express in an okay, but short match in which neither team
- really shines nor dominates. One of the Bangers is put away with the
- Alabama Jam. Cornette then sends Severn into the ring to add some injury
- to insult. Both Head Bangers are suplexed, with one of them receiving a
- double arm submission hold from the Beast. Severn, dressed in a suit,
- adjusts his tie before leaving the ring.
- Before the segment ends Steve Austin uses his one phone call to ring up
- Jim Ross. Austin's voice is played out to the crowd as he vows revenge on
- Vince McMahon next week.
- - Kane and Paul Bearer come out as the steel cage is still being
- constructed. Bearer announces that he's proud of how his Kane did at
- WrestleMania, and that he's dreamed up a match for the two to compete in
- at the next PPV. Paul says he's had a vision of a special match in which
- the ring is surrounded by fire. To win, one wrestler must force his
- opponent to catch fire: an "Inferno Match". Something tells me the
- buyrate for the next PPV just went up a bit.
- Jerry Lawler mentions offhand that D-X will add a new member before the
- show is over.
- - CACTUS JACK/"CHAINSAW" CHARLIE vs. THE NEW AGE OUTLAWS
- They show a clip of Terry Funk getting some ointment rubbed on a nasty
- bruise he'd received the night before. Jim Ross explains that the titles
- had been held up from the night before because Cactus and Funk put the
- Outlaws in the wrong dumpster. This cage match would decide the
- undisputed champs.
- A short, but wild match. Cactus took some nasty slams into the cage. Funk
- was then hung by the chin with a long-chained pair of cuffs. That allowed
- Gunn and the Dog to doubleteam Cactus. This was a no DQ match in which
- the only way to win was pin or submission-none of that "over the top or
- through the door" crap. Things looked good for the Outlaws, but Cactus
- started to stage a single-handed rally. He then climbed to the top, either
- to escape the cage or drop an elbow, but was nailed in the head with a
- chair by the kid, who had come out along with Helmsley and Chyna. Gunn
- and the Dog then teamed to spike piledrive Cactus on a chair. Road Dog
- does the old break dancing "worn" en route to covering Cactus for the pin.
- New Tag Team Champions! Everyone then beats on Cactus as the few
- remaining moments of the show play out. They go off the air with all
- members of DeGeneration X, including Road Dog and Billy Gunn-the other
- new D-X members, doing crotch chops atop the steel cage.
- - Next week: Stone Cold's revenge. Tennessee Lee's surprise.
- Comments:
- Following the tradition of the past few years, the WWF follows up Wrestle-
- Mania with a strong installment of RAW. This year, though, the PPV was good
- enough that the subsequent RAW didn't outshine it. Barely. Fact is, both
- were so good it's hard to make a call as to which, in the end, was "better".
- While everyone is squabbling over that, what can't be denied is that this
- was maybe the strongest one-two punch of shows the WWF has ever delivered.
- It's no surprise how easy Waltman was able to slip into the D-X mix. What
- was a bit surprising was how strong the crowd reaction was for him. His
- comments about Hulk Hogan ("you suck, pal!") went way over with most
- everyone in attendance it seemed. I'm not a huge Waltman fan myself, and I
- have serious doubts about his remaining in-ring skills, but even I can see
- that WCW may have goofed on this one. Lest we all forget that Syxx's
- "Six-Ball" shirt was, for the longest time, WCW's best selling t-shirt. Just
- maybe this guy has a bigger following than either I or WCW thought. I can
- just imagine what the "average" fan out there who watch both shows thinks
- about the NWO situation between Hogan and Nash now that Syxx has shown up in
- the WWF. The whole "where's Scott Hall?" question now would seem bigger than
- ever to those without Internet access, or those who don't call the hotlines.
- The longer Hall is gone from WCW the more some fans will expect to see him
- pop up on RAW some night. Of course we all know he won't, but most WCW fans
- wouldn't know that. Nor would most WWF fans either. WCW may have to bring
- him back sooner than expected just to keep from losing a few viewers. The
- irony is WCW can't trash Waltman in return without pissing off Nash and
- Hall.
- I'm a bit annoyed that the Tag Title match at the PPV ended up being a
- "Dusty Finish" after all. It does slightly diminish what WrestleMania meant.
- Not a huge amount, since it was only the Tag Team Titles, but some
- nonetheless. I guess the reason I'm not fully outraged is because it was, in
- the end, the most logical booking decision. The "Hardcore Legends" get the
- PPV win and Funk gets another title reign added to his career record, while
- it's the better suited Outlaws who go on to face the LOD at the next PPV.
- I haven't decided yet whether their joining D-X is a good thing or not.
- Speaking of which, what's the deal with Michaels? My assumption is that he
- was at home getting some much needed bedrest, and that Helmsley's taking
- over D-X is simply to fill the gap until he comes back. Still, Helmsley
- sure did dis HBK. The night he comes back will be an interview you won't
- want to miss.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- The Bottom Line:
- More happened in two nights in the WWF than has happened in the last three
- months in WCW: four titles changed hands, the LOD returned with Sunny as
- their manager, Sean Waltman returned, Dan Severn returned, Sean "Val Venis"
- Morley was introduced, three new Light Heavyweights came in, Pete Rose was
- Tombstoned, a forklift was used in a match, some blood spilled, Stone Cold
- was arrested and Mike Tyson slugged Shawn Michaels.
- Don't get me wrong, I like Roddy Piper and all, but ...
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- This Week's Winner: RAW.
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1998 by
- John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those
- of "Internet Access, Inc". Check the "Slobberknocker Central" main page for
- info on how to receive the "Recap" free via E-Mail every week.
- Volume One, Number 124 of the "Monday Night Recap", March 30th, 1998.
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