<Fabman650> 21:04 Okay then
everybody here?
<Aristo> 21:05 @Cedur Well then, why do you thimk we're having this chat
<Cedur> 21:05 because I spoke up against being called out for no reason?
<Aero> 21:05 *slams the desk* wrong!
<Cedur> 21:05 I wasn't mad at you at all until this happened
I thought everything was fine
<Fabman650> 21:06 That's the issue.
<Panda-182> 21:06 Almost all if not all of us here have had to talk to you about your behaviour at some point
it's not recent
<Cedur> 21:06 and Pseudo says this is to make everyone comfortable again and well ... resolve tension
<Fabman650> 21:06 Well she is right. Recently there has been a lot of tension between you and the rest of the staff.
<Spinda> 21:07 I mean "recently" is kind of an understatement
<Aero> 21:07 years now actually
<Panda-182> 21:07 This goes further back than Mafia
<Aristo> 21:07 but also recently
like... it never stopped
<Fabman650> 21:08 You seem to have a tendency to challenge our decisions as Moderators
Which you have done on numerous occasions
Not to mention some of your reports, which have been frivolous at best.
<Panda-182> We understand that it's not pleasant being told what not to do, but other users take it on the chin
It feels like you argue back almost every time
<PixelPest> 21:11 For me it's not exactly the problem of challenging moderators, but it's the way you do it
<Fabman650> 21:11 It's not that we have anything against you, but when we tell you that you're breaking rules you give us attitude
<PixelPest> 21:11 ^
And often try to shift the blame from yourself to the staff
<Fabman650> 21:12 Which only puts you in a worse position
<PixelPest> 21:13 Like I'm always open to talking things through civily, it's not okay to approach someone with attitude and immediately get overly defensive and shift blame. You often rant and then don't even listen to me when I DM you, shifting the blame to me
<Fabman650> 21:15 I don't have a problem with being challenged about my decisions either
<Aristo> 21:15 You also need to understand that we're the ones in charge here, not you. We listen to what you have to say, but the final decision is still ours to make
<Aero> 21:15 give Cedur a moment to respond
<Aristo> 21:15 never!!!
<PixelPest> 21:15 Lol
<Cedur> 21:15 I'm sorry guys I don't know how to even respond
<Spinda> 21:15 *holds up pitchspork*
<PixelPest> 21:16 Well that's a problem
<Fabman650> 21:16 lol spinda
<Cedur> 21:16 I think you'd all be very surprised if I tell what I've told to myself about dealing with situations
I wanted to learn myself about turning a blind eye and not being a complainer for the sake of complaining
<Aristo> 21:17 Has that worked so far?
<Cedur> 21:17 and at many occasions, I've stopped discussions for the sake of not escalating them when they threatened to be
<PixelPest> 21:17 So you took up ranting instead and giving the mods attitude?
You definitely haven't been turning a blind eye
You may have turned a blind eye to my responses
<Cedur> 21:18 there's been a gazillion times where I had my mouse over the report button, or my fingers over the keyboard to say something that I feel isn't alright
<Aristo> 21:18 ok chill pixel lol
<Cedur> 21:18 but often enough I just decided to leave you all in peace
<PixelPest> 21:18 But definitely there's a fine line between turning a blind eye and responding and then ignoring all further conversation
<Cedur> 21:18 you of course can't know bc you weren't there for that
and I stop conversations when I feel it's ineffacicious to keep talking
<PixelPest> 21:18 Sorry I'll butt out
<Cedur> 21:18 I'm really not a fan of conflict believe me
<Aristo> 21:19 dont make me post the gif
<PixelPest> 21:19 Lol
<Fabman650> 21:19 shhhh
<Cedur> 21:19 however, Pixel, you've called me out for something that wasn't wrong in the slightest
everyone talks in the tone you called me out for, both members and staff
<Aero> 21:19 explain this
<Panda-182> 21:19 "I'm really not a fan of conflict believe me"
To be honest it doesn't feel like it, you were banned from some other forums for this exact behaviour and some of us who have had to interact with you have had attitude from you
<Fabman650> 21:20 I mean, personally I have nothing against you, but it's not nice seeing you being rude to the other mods.
You need to tone it down a bit and be more civil.
<Panda-182> 21:20 Not to mention when things don't go your way you get defensive about it
such as after the mod applications
and the new forum rules?
<Cedur> 21:21 why is it defensive to comment on the rules, and I get defensive when I'm anxious, not when things don't go my way
<Aristo> 21:22 i saw the pm you sent (i believe?) pseudo and in addition to what you said there before talking about the new rules it came off as ranting
<PixelPest> 21:24 "everyone talks in the tone you called me out for, both members and staff" - Examples?
<Fabman650> 21:28 ^^^
Aristo 21:33 not getting any younger here
PixelPest 21:33 Very true
Fabman650 21:33 ^^
<Cedur> 21:33 I don't think I need to dig for a concrete example. You know that you have your little rough edges every now and then and that's not even bad. The call-out was needless and innocent
Also, you have kept emphasizing that I make rants. Isn't it just the expression of being annoyed?
am I not allowed to be annoyed?
<Fabman650> 21:34 There is a difference between being annoyed and ranting.
<Panda-182> 21:34 The fact is if you're breaking the rules then we aren't treating you any different to any other user doing the same thing
<Aristo> 21:35 also hot take: what if we're annoyed too
<Panda-182> 21:35 By your logic you also report people for "innocent" posts
<PixelPest> 21:35 Cedur I'm going to put it out here and say that there's a difference between accepting that you could be wrong and considering that you might be able to learn something from this
Instead of just blaming other people who are trying to help you
We didn't make this chat because we wanted to get back at you
This chat is to give you a chance to learn so that you don't get banned since we decided you could have one last chance
We're taking our time to try to help you not get banned
It would be so much easier just to ban you and it would take like 30 seconds of one person's time
But we aren't doing that
So I suggest that you consider stop trying to shift the blame to us when we're only trying to help you
<Aristo> 21:37 also re: "Also, you have kept emphasizing that I make rants. Isn't it just the expression of being annoyed?
am I not allowed to be annoyed?"
Not when every rant is a passive aggressive jab at the staff that does nothing but fuel the ongoing fire
<Fabman650> 21:39 The point of this chat is for us to try to help you improve your behaviour and ease this tension.(edited)
Not to have a go at you
We want you to improve because we know that you CAN
<Panda-182> 21:40 It's not like you don't contribute to the forums
<Cedur> 21:41 I'm going to start with saying that the last few months have felt completely different for me and thus I still think I got off at the wrong station now
yes I can. Many of the things you've said I've started noticing on myself already and I've told myself to easen up many times.
But still, I'm not afraid to be silent when I see things going wrong
mafia went terribly wrong. I've got involved into every single argument and I was made a scapegoat by various members until it got shut down
and since it is shut down, is it relevant anymore?`
<Aero> 21:42 yes
<Panda-182> 21:42 You are still missing the point and acting like we are antagonising you
<PixelPest> 21:43 ^
<Cedur> 21:43 I have barely had anything against the staff on a personal level
I just noticed how their ways of acting are counterproductive and I've spoke about it
<Aristo> 21:44 y u keep actin like it then tho
<Fabman650> 21:44 There's nothing wrong with giving us your say.
But there is something wrong with giving us attitude and being defensive when we disagree with you.(edited)
<PixelPest> 21:45 >shifting the blame
<Fabman650> 21:45 ^
You just need to be more civil and understand that we're not always going to agree with you.
<Aristo> 21:46 do you not notice that its a common theme with you that its always everyone else
<Cedur> 21:48 I've heard this line a gazillion times IRL and it was very often used for silencing purposes; it basically implied "it's always you"
it's not the one side or the other every time
<Aristo> 21:48 https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/419223180557680663/419234512363323413/okay_i_see.gif
<Cedur> 21:48 and that's not how I'm thinking at all
<Fabman650> 21:48 and there's the gif
<Aristo> 21:48 you know when people critique you and the first thing you do is accuse them of gaslighting
that doesnt leave a very good impression
<Quill> 21:49 get these normie gifs outta here
<Aero> 21:51 what about your behavior on previous forums
<Cedur> 21:52 Yes, I've tried everything to not let it go down the drain like there
and yet I'm sitting here now having a deja-vu
<Aristo> 21:52 yeah
weird
isnt it
almost like it has something to do with you
<Aero> 21:52 yeah
like
here we are
<Cedur> 21:52 are you even giving credibility to my words?
<Aero> 21:53 the last community you were it apparently got so bad their staff had to warn smbx staff about you
<Aristo> 21:53 all youve said so far is "im behaving well, i swear, youre just not seeing much of it"
<Aero> 21:53 for very similar stuff
and it looks like it's just persistent
<Cedur> 21:53 no, i'm not saying my behaviour would be flawless and all
I'm saying that it's by far not as terrible as it's made out to be
<Aristo> 21:54 then why are we having this chat right now
<Aero> 21:54 maybe that's the problem
<Fabman650> 21:55 As I've said already, this is the issue we're having here.
<Aero> 21:56 this is probably the point we'll have to wrap up on
<Cedur> 21:56 sorry guys I have to leave, it's been an hour already
<Aero> 21:57 alright well
this chat didn't really go anywhere
so like
think about what was said already
<Quill> 21:57 sorry wrong chat
<Fabman650> 21:57 dammit quill
<Aero> 21:57 and think about it over the next week
the staff feels it's necessary to ban you for a week, so that you have time to reflect and to make it clear that your behavior - even though you may not think it's that bad - hasn't been too good.