Stuck in an RPG – Review by CosmicWatcher

By: CosmicWatcher !118LTnv3DE
Originally posted 31.07.2016
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STRUCK IN AN RPG QUEST

THREAD 1 REVIEW

WRITTEN AS IT IS READ

STARTING WITH GOOD FEELINGS:

Was reading Dark Spirits, but I feel drained on straight fantasy stuff and I don't want that bias to sink into the review, so I'm reviewing this quest because I want to start a quest with good feelings. And the premise gives me nothing but good feelings.

I wore out a VHS of Tron when I was a kid, my first AOL screenname was RebootBob, I cried because I couldn't figure out Digimon World for the PS1, and I have fond memories staying up late on a bean bag watching Dot.Hack SIGN on cartoon network. I'm naturally a sucker for "trapped in a video game" stuff.

Swords Arts was garbage though. Just getting that out there.

So I feel pretty good going into this quest. We're the cliche pimply faced nerd who hates school and bullies. A shady corporation sends us a virtual boy to test and we find ourselves stuck in an RPG. You know this setup.

I started HGQ with good feelings. Barefoot wolf girl nature spirit tomboys with childish energy and red eyes and short white hair appeal to me on so many levels.

It didn't last long. Let's see how this quest does.

CHARACTER CREATION

We have some kind of seizure putting on the helmet but remain disturbingly calm when we wake up inside the game. Shouldn't we be demanding to be let go? Freaking out as we can't move our physical body? Asking the machine to call 9-11?

We just had a seizure and we're acting more put out than terrified. "Well, whatever. There's probably one of these exit points near the beginning of the game. Might as well make a character".

For all we know our hair is on fire back in the real world. Now is not the time to play a game.

What should have happened is either have us character gen and explore the game THEN find out we're trapped or have us go through a freak out, realize our helplessness, and then character gen.

This way isn't working.

Our name is selected as Bob "The Suspense" Pooper.

You don't have to listen to joke votes. That's our name for the rest of the quest. Bob Pooper.

It didn't have to be this way.

RACE SELECTION

We get our choice between human, Elephant man (as in an elephant, not I AM A HUMAN BEING), a chimpanzee mosquito thing and a mole monster.

Wouldn't the character gen have information on all these werido races? It really should. Names at least?

We pick human and then have a bunch of standard RPG classes to pick. You know, even Final Fantasy had Blue and White and Black mages and stuff like Dragoons. Nethack had cavemen and samurai. Where's the flavor?

How far in the beta is this video game? Have they not hired writers?

We pick wizard and spawn in the game randomly for bonus XP.

We are still only mildly concerned about that whole "virtual boy gave me a seizure" thing.

ADVENTURES IN THE DIGITAL WORLD

So this isn't a serious quest. I get that. Our name is Bob Pooper and our first spell summons a geodude. As in the pokemon.



I'm really really really not feeling this world. It is the driest setting you can imagine. You'd think we'd try to explore the "game" part of the world. See where the world walls are or how detailed the towns are or how advance the NPCs are AI wise.

For all we know we're talking to living thinking artificial beings. And that doesn't interest us in the slightest.

I think trying to Turing test the NPC would be a hell of a lot more exciting then killing things to level up and then talking to an Elephant Man trying to sell us "the real shit" "pace powder" because "sheitttt nigga this stuff is for real".

No seriously. That happens.

I'm sure its funny to some people.

THE PLOT THICKENS. AND CRACKS.

We do boring RPG stuff until we meet "Lelogas the Elf" (seriously).

He lays out that we're basically in Sword Arts. There are 1000 players trapped in the world and we are only one of many. Only "RealOG123" has ever escaped the world. But sometimes an exit opens up in the dungeons and everyone rushes to get to it.

The QM does a Narnia thing which makes the plot holes of the SAO premise easier to swallow. Time moves slower in the game. Legolas has been in the game for six years and its only been a day outside.

Okay. Someone managed to find how to overclock human perception to an insane level. That's not even going into the technology needed to generate a virtual reality that can manage a world in which 6 years pass for every normal day.

And they use this technology. To make a video game. To torture people.

So it makes sense why the outside world can't help. They're moving in slow motion. But you plug one plot hole several more spring up like cracks in a dam.

Just imagine the logistics behind what has happened to these 1000 people. Any pretense to seriousness or reason is out the window.



We do some basic generic RPG stuff. We meet Robin the thief and a cleric and forma little party. We kill things and level up.

VERDICT

I give the quest a HARD NO RECOMMENDATION. The tone is inconsistent. The plot meanders. The characters aren't compelling. The setting is dull.

ADVICE

A plot like this needs constant forward momentum. Once we get in the virtual world we need to find to be looking for that way and keep looking for that way out. Once we're told that the only way out comes through a dungeon that rarely appears the momentum comes to a halt and the story comes less trying to solve the prison of the digital world and more settling for it and doing boring generic JRPG stuff.

Instead of fighting and leveling the early story needs to stress discovery. We need to learn about the fiction of the game world, the company that's made it, the programmers, stuff like that. Sense everyone was kind of trapped by surprise it could be interesting to piece together what has happened from rumors-not all of which are true.

The game aspect needs to be stressed beyond letting us summon stats screen and IM-ing our friends. Think exploits, cheats, glitches, and interactions with the AI. That in particular provides an interesting avenue for exploration.

THINGS TO READ

I recommend checking out UBIK and MAZE OF DEATH and EYE IN THE SKY by Philip K Dick, especially UBIK. The stories are about people trapped in artificial worlds and they got everything a quest like this needs-a sense of mystery, a constant building momentum and sense of urgency, people creatively trying to solve and exploit the world, and wonderfully colorful settings.

Spend a long time thinking about the setting and ending to the game before starting it. It'll give the setting color and keep things from becoming meandering and dull. Don't be afraid to have threads where characters just explore and talk. When you're trapped in a world you're going to want to find everything you can about the world right?

How does digital food tastes? What does it feel like to fall asleep and wake up? What happens if a PC tries to disguise themselves as an NPC? Keep these questions in mind when writing.

END OF REVIEW