Babysitting a friend's neko

Ugh, how did I get roped into doing this... Babysitting an entire weekend for a neko, a kitten no less. They're going to be so, so-- *needy* and affectionate and I don't know if I can give that out for that long... Well, I haven't cuddled in a while, so I *guess* it'll be a nice change of pace.

Let's see 154, 156, 158 here we are. Let's hope the key works... *click* Great, it does.

Now, I wonder where the little rascal is. Oh! She left a note.

Take good care of them blah blah, have ingredients for their favorite meals, thank god. If they're hiding they're probably in the blanket fort they've made at the foot of my bed in the back room blah blah... huh, what's this underlined... They have a security blanket, even if it gets dirty don't wash it, wait until I get back. Aw, that's kinda cute. Their name is 'sweetheart'.

Well, guess it's time to meet the little kitty. [calling out] Sweetheart! Where are you? Guess they're in the back room.

Aww, they weren't kidding about the blanket fort. They look so sweet curled up like that. I'd hate to wake them up, but I do want to get to know them...

Oh! You woke up! I'm sorry, was I talking too loudly?

Geez, *Some*one is a little grumpy today.

No, I'm not leaving just because you want me to. Your mom asked me to look after you and I'm going to be here the whole weekend.

Yea, I know, you miss your mom, but hopefully, we can have some fun together, too!

You just want me to go away... Kitten, I told you, I'm supposed to watch over you, I can't just leave you alone by yourself! Who would cook for you, cuddle with you, make sure you're safe?

Oh, "you'll manage"? Sounds like you just don't like me.

W-What did I do? I just got here and you're already being so *mean*.

Look, honey, I miss your mom, too. She is one of my good friends and I talk to her almost every day. But, she's out at a conference right now and won't be back until Monday, so, until then, we're going to have to get along with each other, okay?

You-- refuse? [deep breath; quietly] It's okay *your name here*, you're not going to drop-kick a kitten across the room. Not going to lose my temper with them...

How about this, is there some treat that your mom sometimes gives you when you're good that would help you cooperate with me?

Bacon? Okay, let me see if I can fry some up for you.

[goes into the kitchen to fry up bacon]

Bacon, bacon, where are you. I really shouldn't be feeding such a young thing something so unhealthy, but I need *something* for them to actually work with me...

*frying sounds*

This is not how I thought things would've gone. I wasn't planning on them being so difficult to deal with. Honestly, I think I would've rather had the lovey-dovey neko over this little... monster...

Hey! Are you ready to eat? The bacon's almost done.

Here you go, freshly fried bacon.

You don't want it? [holding back anger] What's wrong with it?

It's not crispy enough? Ughh, fine, I'll fry it for a little bit longer.

No, it won't get burnt, I'll be careful.

*more frying sounds*

Okay, there, that should be more to your liking... I hope...

Okay, I'm glad you enjoy it. Now, will you *please* stop antagonizing me? I promise that I'm not that bad a person, I just want the best for you, just like your mom does. She trusted me to make sure you're safe, happy. And you just have to let me know what you want to make that happen, okay? Think of this as a little vacation!

Yea, it's not going to be the same without your mom, but... *sigh* I don't know what you want from me, buddy. I'm trying my best. I hope you can see that.

*phone rings*

Oh, I think that's your mom, let me go talk to her for a bit while you finish up your bacon, okay sweetheart?

[Walks out of the room]

Heyyyy, what's going on? How are you doing?

Oh, sweetheart? They're... doing fine. A bit antagonizing. A bit--[gritted teeth] frustrating, but I think they're doing okay without you.

Dinner? Oh! Uhm... I made them some... bacon.

Don't yell at me! Yes, I know that that much salt and fat aren't good for a neko kit but it was the only thing that got them to get out of their fort and talking to me without asking me to "get out", "leave" or just generally be a frustrating little shit.

Yes, they *have* been that difficult.

They're usually more loving than that? Well, they certainly ain't showing it. They're taking every opportunity to take the piss out of me! I just straight up don't know how to deal with someone that is *this* resistant. I've dealt with troublesome kids in the past, but yours is... something different...

Is there anything that I can do that they like and that you approve of to help them calm down?

They... like being rocked? Like, in a rocking chair? How am I going to convince them to get in there with me, when I can't even convince them to eat normal food?

Just... Pick them up? Won't they, like, bite me and stuff?

What do you mean "probably"? I'm not going to fight a neko with claws and fangs that can rip me to shreds!

Okay, I'll trust you.

How else are they doing? They... They really miss you. Everything I do "isn't how mom does it" and it's kind of frustrating me. I hope things are going okay on your end.

Yea, I love you, too buddy. Bye.

Hey, sweetie, have you finished-- yea you finished that really quick. That's definitely your favorite food, isn't it?

Now, since it's getting a little late, how about we get you to bed, okay?

[intimidatingly] You don't want to? Oh, I didn't ask. And, frankly, I don't care. You're not going to bully me around, I'm the one in charge here, remember? So, you can either come with me or I will pick you up and carry you.

That's a good kitten, now, let's get you up into the rocking chair, okay? Here, sit on my lap and I'll wrap your blanket around you.

*slowly rocks neko back and forth*

Yea, that feels nice, doesn't it? Feeling a little calmer now?

Oh? You apologize for being mean earlier? That's okay, I know it's been rough on you; a stranger comes into your house, your mom is gone, things just seem completely out of wack, but, I promise you that I'm here to comfort you, not to hurt you.

Shh, shhh. Stay still, that's a good kitten. Just close your eyes and go to sleep for me. I promise I'll keep you safe, okay?

[pause, hum something softly if you'd like]

Finally, I think they've gone to sleep. *sigh* What a day with this little one. I'm glad that they're finally warming up to me. Let's get you back into your little fort and-- aww, they're not letting go of me... I guess they'll have to sleep with me, then.

[speaker climbs into bed silently]

Okay, there we go... And you're kneading me. *sigh* That's adorable but at the same time [trying to not wake up neko through pain] you're getting my skin... *sigh* What am I going to do with you, Sweetheart? I'll just snuggle you close and hope you don't wake up, okay? There you go; sweet dreams little one.