RWBY: The Grimm Campaign Ep2 Abridged

EPISODE 1 ABRIDGED: https://pastebin.com/UrQ4QH6u

>Eddy Rivas as the game's Head Master.
>Boomstick from that show people stopped giving a shit about as Asher Mora.
>Kerry "Neptune Vasilias" Shawcross as Pyke Rite.
>Laura Yates as Arrastra Skye.
>Huge Forehead Audio Geek as Fenix Nemean, the half-human-half-Faunus (which is still fucking stupid).

>Despite being warned of how bad of a job Kerry would do, Eddy called on him to do a recap of the last session.
>Does an okay job, but can't remember the name of the city he came up with for the session.
>I can't blame him, considering I didn't even know how to spell the damn name either.
>Also forgets about the very first combat encounter they had.
>This is all according to Kerry's plan not to be counted on to make recaps of previous sessions.
>All of this says a lot about him considering he's supposed to be a professional writer for a fully-fledged web series.
>Boomstick does a much better job, even acknowledging poor Tumms's death.
>Yeah, he's gonna do recaps from now on.

>Back to the present.
>Team FAAP is at the Kuchinashi (thank fuck it's actually spelt out in the description of each video) Approach.
>Turns out, there's more than one way into Kuchinashi, and they happen to be on one route with closed gates with Grimm attacking.
>A brief glimpse at the Lancer tokens, which are pretty cool.
>Pyke opts to go first.
>Before that happens, Ashur has an idea.
>"Arrastra, can I borrow that rope so I can tie it to Idiot over here?"
>Rope acquired.
>Pyke brings his arms up.
>"Tie me up!"
>Wonderful phrasing.
>Pyke gets the roped tied around his waist.
>Meanwhile, Fenix checks the environment to see if there's more than two lancers.
>It isn't really shown in TaleSpire, but the environment narratively-speaking is a bit of a chaotic clusterfuck.
>Asher decides to tie the other half of the rope to Fenix.
>Forehead.exe has stopped working.
>"Uhhh... Nani? Okay..."
>Arrastra inspects the bridge for any parts that are too unstable to safely walk on.
>Rolls a 16+5.
>Despite how poorly maintained it is, it's still safe to walk on.
>Team FAAP hatches a plan to fight the Lancers.
>Asher decides to have Pyke draw the Grimm's attention so they don't have to fight on a bridge.
>Fenix has to come with Pyke because they both have rope tied between them for some reason.
>Awkward interaction where they have to hobble their tokens along the bridge.
>Once the two are in position, Pyke describes how he's going to use an attack "very similar to a Firebolt" to draw the attention of the two Lancers.
>Fenix is already trying to back away.
>Since he's backing away, he gets to roll perception.
>Fenix rolls an 18.
>More Lancers show up, and they're flanking the party!
>Roll initiative!

>Arrastra, Fenix, Pyke, Asher, and Lancers is the turn order.
>Pyke gets a free turn due to a surprise round on the Lancers at the front.
>Asher tries to warn Pyke not to provoke the Front Lancers, but it's too late.
>Five damage is dealt to one of them.
>Pyke celebrates his marksmanship at first, but as soon as he turned around to the others, he realized what was going on.

Something to note: the stat-block for Lancers sets them at 18 HP. I discovered this while seeing Eddy changing the HP of one of the tokens after it was hit.

>True turn order happens.
>Arrastra attacks one of the Rear Lancers, hitting it for 6+4 damage.
>Fenix's turn.
>Fenix is gonna try to move in to attack.
>Realizes he's still tied to Pyke.
>Fuck.mp3
>Fenix has to drag Pyke away from the Front Lancers just to move to the Rear Lancers.
>Strength contests.
>Fenix wins by a mile!
>Pyke gets dragged away from the Front Lancers like a kid on a leash.
>Fenix moves around like normal since Pyke rolled so low for strength.
>Once Fenix finishes moving, Pyke's token just floats into frame with unintended comedic timing.
>Fenix punches the bolt Arrastra fired further into the Lancer like a nail being driven in by a hammer
>Rolls a 1+4 for damage.
>Three HP remaining.
>Pyke's turn
>Moves a bit and opens fire on the same Rear Lancer
>Roll a 15+4 to hit
>Roll a 2+4 for damage
>Snapshots the Lancer where the bolt was driven further by Fenix, killing it outright.
>Fenix isn't happy since this shot landed right after Fenix hammered the bolt in and the bullet could've hit his hand.
>Asher's turn
>Decides to leap onto the other Rear Lancer to stab it in the head
>Misses with a 6.
>Lancers' turn.
>Front Lancers decide to focus on the gate again.
>Other Rear Lancer attacks Asher.
>Barely hits him for an unknown amount of damage (it's never stated).
>Two more lancers show up!
>Arrastra's turn
>Rolls a 17+4
>8+4 damage
>Fenix's turn.
>Tries to go for the one-two punch
>First punch misses with a 6 like Asher did.
>Second one hits
>Because of the nature of the attack, the second hit had double damage
>4 damage

>A momentary intermission in combat where Kerry informs Eddy of the different parts of a wasp's body for the sake of narrating damage dealt to Lancers in the future.
>The topic suddenly leads to Kerry having to admit that he isn't actually wearing pants right now, then turns his office chair to look away from the camera in shame.
>Back to combat

>Pyke's turn
>Kerry asks if the fact that Asher is in the way will affect Pyke's aim or not
>Pyke is standing on higher ground than Asher, so there's no issues.
>"Okay. Call me Anakin."
>[Laura and Forehead didn't like that.]
>Probably because they know Obi-Wan says that, which Eddy points out.
>Pyke shoots the Lancer, but misses
>Pyke uses his Aura Points to make another attack
>Eddy goes over what AP does again.
>Rolls a 14+4 this time and hits for 1+4 damage.
>Its wing gets clipped.
>Lancer should be dead since it's at -3 HP and there's been no indication for Lancers having damage resistance.
>But okay.
>Sure.
>Asher's turn
>Hits with an 18 for 3+4 damage.
>Has a missing mandible now
>Lancer is somehow still alive at -10 HP.
>Boomstick forgets his character has a second attack and thus can deal more damage
>Asher finishes off the Lancer with his second attack.
>Lancers' turn.

>Another intermission
>Kerry wants to make an announcement.
>"If one thing ends up in the [RWBY] Wiki from this, make sure it's this gate. Thank you."
>The group goes as far as to name it.
>Boomstick has an idea
>"Can we name it Bill Gates?"
>God damn it.

>One of the lancers deals damage to Bill Gates.
>Meanwhile, another lancer goes after Asher because his player gave the gate a shitty name.
>Is actually at 6 HP.
>The Lancer hits
>Nah, fam, Asher's gonna spend some AP to do an Uncanny Dodge.
>Gets nicked for a single point of damage, bringing him down to 5 HP.
>Fenix gets attacked by another Lancer.
>Because of Fenix's earlier double-attack, the Lancer has advantage.
>Kerry suggests using the rope still tied between the his own and Boomstick's character to yank Fenix out of attack range.
>Eddy loves the idea, but not only is it not Pyke's turn, but he already spent AP earlier.
>Counter-idea from Boomstick:
>Incorporate Pyke into a team attack that Fenix can initiate to use Pyke as a living wrecking ball.
>Sure, but once it's Fenix's turn.
>Speaking of, Fenix is hit for 3 damage.
>BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
>Another two lancers show up!
>Arrastra's turn.
>Asks if either Asher or Fenix need help.
>Asher should be fine for a bit longer.
>Fenix is pumped to fight some more bugs.
>Arrastra decides to heal Asher anyway, leading into the discussion of her Semblance.
>Basically can heal people, but she takes damage equal to how much Aura is restored.
>Arrastra uses Green Dust for this, which means she'll get knocked back ten feet.
>Asher is healed for 6 points.
>Arrastra apparently doesn't take damage due to her choice of Dust, and is just knocked back and prone.
>Fenix's turn.
>Beast mode engaged.
>Decides to beat a motherfucker with another motherfucker.
>Succeeds the necessary strength check.
>Throws the Lancer that stung him at one of the ones that just entered the combat area.
>2 damage for the Lancer thrown, 1 damage for the Lancer that was hit.
>Fenix wants to grab Asher and run to the gate.
>Likely what's running through Boomstick's head right now as this conversation is happening:
>No!
>"You'll have to make a strength contest with Asher."
>NO!
>Both of them roll low, but Fenix still wins the Strength contest.
>Fenix just picks him up and retreats to the bridge, much to Asher's dismay.
>Pyke's turn
>Moves 30 feet along the bridge.
>He spends 4 AP to run 20 extra feet on top of his normal 30 feet movement speed.
>Barely manages to travel the extra movement before feeling all the rope's slack disappear.
>Boomstick points out that the rope could've been untied at any point (possibly as a free action) and yet both characters are still tied to each other.
>But to be fair, Pyke is also scared shitless of Beast Mode Fenix, so there's that.
>Pyke shoots the Lancer he fireball'd earlier and misses--
>No, wait, it's a hit for 7+4 damage.
>Its wings crumple up and it's near-death now.
>Asher's turn
>Decides to roll perception to see if anymore Lancers show up.
>Rolls an 18 and, yes, there are in fact more on their way.
>Jump-cuts to one of the Lancers attacking Bill Gates, who is near-death.

>Kerry points out my exact thoughts on there being so many Lancers to keep track of.
>Just for that, Eddy throws in one more.

>Arrastra's turn.
>Prioritizes shooting at the weakest Lancer in the rear swarm.
>Hits for 3+4 damage, eliminating it.
>Fenix's turn
>Yep, time to go!
>Runs towards where Pyke is at and slips out of Beast Mode, leaving Asher behind.
>Pyke's turn
>Shoots at one of the Lancers
>The bullet go through the abdomen all the way out the head like it's Sniper Elite, and then the Lancer explodes.
>Another cut to Asher's turn.
>Asher uses his Semblance in Pulse Mode
>Casts a 15-foot light that, if anyone in range fails the needed Dex save, deals 1d8 radiant damage (half if succeeded) and blinds targets (which only applies if the save fails).
>So yeah, functions basically like Ruby Rose's fucking silver eyes do.
>Lancers' turn.
>Bill Gates gets destroyed.
>Arrastra's turn.
>Sprints forty feet towards where Bill Gates died and fires at the Lancer still at the destroyed gate.
>Hits for 7 damage.
>Fenix's turn.
>Nothing significant happens.
>Pyke's turn.
>Pyke shoots the Gate Lancer and hits for 2+4 damage.
>Asher's turn.
>NIGERUNDAYOOOOO!!
>Provokes Attacks of Opportunity for two Lancers.
>One of the Lancer hits Asher in the ass for 3 damage.
>Asher tries to retaliate, but misses.
>Kerry makes a terrible pun about the fact that Asher got stung in the ass.
>Not even gonna bother writing what the pun was.
>It's not even funny in a dumb way like most puns are, either.
>It just makes zero sense.
>Lancers' turn.
>Gate Lancer moves on to attack Alexander the Gate next.
>Yes, they gave another gate a unique name.
>Even Forehead is in minor physical pain just from hearing it.
>Kerry looks proud of himself when he shouldn't be.
>Alexander the Gate is opened and a bunch of the City Guard come pouring out.
>The encounter ends with Team FAAP running down the bridge and being brought into Kuchinashi, while the City Guard lays down crossbow fire on the remaining Lancers.
>Eddy narrates the group momentarily paying their respects to Bill Gates, entering through Alexander the Gate, and then a third one which they don't bother naming.

>Team FAAP is brought into a "dark cave" where they meet another Huntsman
>Old and surly gentleman who wears a lot of leather.
>Has an enormous sword that's probably also a gun.
>Kerry nods his head in approval of the sword-gun.
>Forehead is just face-palming.
>The old guy is helping the City Guard to push back the Grimm and ultimately get the gate closed.
>He's got a Sheriff's badge
>Old guy leads Team FAAP further in while Fenix FINALLY starts untying the rope.
>Old guy is wondering who's responsible for tying them together in the first place.
>Pyke doesn't hesitate to finger the blame onto Asher.
>Old guy deftly unties the knot keeping Fenix secure before he and Team FAAP move on.
>After some more walking, he addresses the group.
>Old guy is Alabaster, the sheriff of Kuchinashi.
>"Are you the idiots who messed with our gates?"
>Asher is quick to point out that, no, they're the idiots who managed to take down some of the Lancers.
>Alabaster is still skeptical that he's telling the truth.
>Pyke and Arrastra are trying to smooth things over with Alabaster.
>Fenix steps in
>"Do you have any food by any chance?"
>Alabaster is 200% done
>Regardless, he apologizes for being "a touch ungrateful."
>He's just had to deal with Grimm attacks that have been happening since before Team FAAP even arrived at Kuchinashi.
>He asks who the party is, and they introduce themselves.
>Pyke's positivity rubs Alabaster the wrong way.
>Arrastra is the more inquisitive one in the group, wanting to know how Team FAAP can help.
>Alabaster only recently became sheriff after the last one died, so at best, he knows that his job is to try and keep the Grimm out of the city. Plus, there's crime families feuding.
>He notifies the party of a tavern called The Skillful, where all the important and dangerous people hang out.
>Huntsmen and Huntresses only.
>The people there will have the intel Team FAAP is looking for.
>Yeah, Asher knows the place. He can take the party there.
>Fenix's stomach growls rather loudly, which prompts Alabaster to mention that the owner, Opal, can get the team some grub.
>Team FAAP make their way there, but Alabastor stops them to say one more thing.
>"Don't cause too much trouble. This place can getcha. And if you do cause too much trouble and I'm the one that has to be there? I'm gonna take you in."
>Felix responds.
>"Learn to be nicer to my friends."
>Team FAAP leaves.
>Actually, before that, Asher hangs back and mentions something to Alabaster.
>"I'm not with them by choice."
>Alabaster knows the feeling.

>Team FAAP arrive at the city of Kuchinashi, which Eddy takes the time to describe what's going on and what the mood is like.
>Summarizes it as a Cyberpunk Kyoto.
>Old and mystic, yet has "modern touches" to it.
>Crime is so common here that the people who live there, even the more honest folk, do business with criminals.
>Bad guys need to eat and do their shopping too, y'know.
>People are closing shop and don't pay Team FAAP much mind.
>Stray animals are scurrying around.
>Team FAAP is being watched from the alley ways, and most people who are in the main strip are just hoping to be left alone.
>Three major locations in Kuchinashi: the Central Strip, the Lower Valley, and the Upper Cliffs.
>Lower Valley is a bunch of warehouses containing all the private shit the criminals have, and are closer to strongholds than actual warehouses.
>I personally couldn't help but be reminded of DarkRP after that bit of narration was mentioned.
>Upper Cliffs are the residential district. They're more precarious as you go up the cliffs, but it also represents where the criminals are on the totem pole. The higher you go, the bigger the fish and all that.
>Central Strip's notable locations include its own combat school, the market, The Hedges (a series of seemingly endless alleyways, basically), and The Skillful.
>The Skillful is important since it's a hub for Huntsman and Huntresses to go to when they're either on the job or looking for work without any concern for where the money comes from.
>Basically a quaint log cabin in terms of aesthetics.
>It even has a mummified Boarbatusk head above the front door, which is miraculous in its own right considering Grimm normally dissolve when dead.
>Most likely kept alive just to be a door ornament, since its eyes are tracking Team FAAP as they approach the front door.
>Charming.
>Team FAAP enter the tavern.
>But so does an absolute unit of a Faunus woman with "filed-off buck antlers."
>Equally big rifle she's packing too!
>She sits down somewhere and takes notice of Team FAAP.
>Proposes a riddle for them to solve.
>Session ends.
>Before the video itself ends, Laura mentions that Arrastra is totally gay for the giant Faunus girl.