Anon In Equestria - Chapter 4 'Resident'

>Day 5 in Equestria, morning.
>You awake from the best sleep you’ve had in, well, 5 days.
>Light peeks its way into your room; it’s deadest on getting in your eyes.
Hnnng, why do all good things come to an end?
>”What are you talking about?! It’s a beautiful morning!”
>Pinkie Pie.
Pinkieeeeeeeeee, what are you doing here?
>”You went to sleep without saying good night! I don’t know what it’s like in ‘Humonia’ but here in Equestria we say good night to our friends!”
>It’s true, after the incident with Rarity you crawled into bed and fell asleep.
Well, good night, then!
>”Don’t be silly! It’s morning now!”
Pinkie, did you really stay the entire night just be-
>”Nooo! You didn’t finish cleaning, you did something to Rarity that upset her, and Applejack wouldn’t stop trying to get back in!”
>Yelling yelling, why is she always yelling?
>”Now wake up, mister!” She jabs a hoof into your kidney than adopts the sweetest tone, “I made you breakfast.”
>Aw shit, you can smell it. How did you not smell those pancakes?
>You jump out of bed in excitement but quickly shift back to your annoyed expression.
>You can’t give Pinkie the impression that you’re happy she’s here.
>You walk into the living room; it’s so damn clean it sparkles.
>But who cares, the kitchen is your goal.
>You walk into your kitchen and get a good look at it for the first time.
>It’s cramped, to the left of the door is a small table that can 3 or 4 ponies could occupy.
>On the other side of the room, a large stack of steaming, fluffy pancakes on the counter beckons you.
>You load a plate up with a good chunk of the stack, walk to the table, and begin shoveling it in your mouth.
>Pinkie gets a plate for herself but waits for you.
Inkie, ieh unin won?
>Okay maybe you should try swallowing your food.
Excuse me, is there something wrong, Pinkie?
>”Yeah there is! Rarity, Applejack, you! What’s up?”
>It was too much to hope for, for this to be dropped.
Well, yesterday was kind of a crazy day. Should I just start at the beginning?
>She nods and you start your story from the library.
>30 minutes later.
So, yeah, Rarity’s comment hurt but it’s not like I haven’t made the same mistake. I feel kinda shitty about the whole thing now.
>Pinkie Pie taps her hooves against the table.
>”You should go be friends with them!”
What?
>”Yeah!” She finally starts eating her pancakes. They’re probably cold by now.
I can see that happening with Rarity but how should I go about that with Applejack?
>”Beats me!”
And another thing, why did you stay over? Don’t give me that bullcrap about not saying good night.
>She ignores the question, cold pancakes are never that hypnotizing.
Whatever, Pinkie. I’m going for a walk, I want you out of my house by the time I get back.
>”Okie-Dokie-Loki!”
>You take a step out of front door, breathe in the warm spring air andJESUS DICK, WHAT THE FUCK!
>Letters, letters everywhere.
>Damn, you must have a ton of fans.
>You pick one up.
>To Anon. From Applejack.
>Another one.
>To Anon. From Applejack.
>You can see where this is going.
>You grab a small handful just so you have something to do while on your walk.
>You open the first one.
>”der anon, I jus wantd to say sory for my actuns yesterday. it was very rud of me and I woud lik to make it up to you over diner”
>Well that was nice. It wouldn’t hurt to give her a second chance either. Things are looking up.
>Next letter.
>”oh shit anon your cock is so good I woud lik to have it in me if I se you agen im going to fuck you right there I dont care if wer in the midle of ponyville”
>So much for a second chance.
>Another letter
>” fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you”
>Classy, next one.
>No words, it’s just a very crudely drawn… you don’t even know. Moving on.
>”der anon pleas make sur you reed this leter and only this leter i was wonder if you wanted to have diner tonite i promis not to do the things i said in my other leters ps dont reed thos!!  –lov applejack”
>Okay one more.
>”anon I lov you.”
>Damn dude. It would be such a dick move to just ignore her after all this.
>Confront Applejack, let’s put that on today’s list.
>While we’re at it, let’s check that list.
>- Visit Pinkie Pie. Already done
>-See if Rarity can make new clothes. (AVOID TALKING ABOUT LAST NIGHT)
>-Visit Fluttershy
>-Lunch break
>-Visit Twilight for books n’ shit. Dodge anatomy questions.
>-Chill at home
>-Confront Applejack. (Join her for dinner if things go well.)
>Yeah, everything looks good.
>And so begins your very first day as an official resident of Ponyville.

---
The Boutique:


>Carousel Boutique wasn’t hard to find, it stood out too much.
>As you approach the door opens.
>Applejack waOH SHIT IT’S APPLEJACK.
>You two lock eyes.
>Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck
>She runs away.
>… Cool! Weird, but cool!
>You enter the Boutique, a bell rings as you open the door.
>Rarity comes out a door from the far side of the room.
>”Oh, Anon, I wasn’t expecting you this morning. How may I help you?”
Hey, I was wondering if you would be able to make more clothes for me.
>”Darling, of course I can! I imagine trotting around Ponyville in the same clothes every day would be dreadful”
Having to wait until the middle of the night to wash them just so I won’t be seen is a good reason too!
>You both share a laugh.
>Rarity puts on an apologetic face afterwards.
>Here it comes.
>”Anon, I want to apologize about last night. It was rude and there’s no excuse for what I said.”
Did you mean what you said?
>”Well of course not! I don’t think you’re… Anon, you are a fine gentlecolt. Don’t you let anyp0ny tell you otherwise.”
Then why did you say it?
>”It doesn’t matter, it was inappropriate of me. Now, I’m willing to give you the clothes you’re requesting, free of charge, if you just drop it.”
>Oh man, this shit goes deep. Dropping it sounds like a good idea since you have like 0 fuckin’ bucks… bits. Whatever.
Um, alright then. I suppose it isn’t a big deal anyway. Words are only words, after all. Heh.
>”Thank you, Anon.” She looks like she could start crying. Ugh, the curiosity is killing you now.
So, um, how do we go about making more clothes for me?
>”It won’t be hard, dear. It’ll be like making clothes for a stallion, I just need to alter the proportions.”
Uh-huh…
>”I’ll need to you step in the back and disrobe for me.” Her horn flares up with magic as items around her begin to levitate. You can only recognize a pen, paper, and a measuring tape.
Like, completely?
>”Humans wear undergarments, don’t they? You may leave those on unless they get in the way.”
>That was unlikely. After all you were wearing some SWANK ASS BOXER BRIEFS.
>You walk into the next room.
>This was obviously the workshop. Fabrics and threads were all over the place. On the other side of the wall were mannequins, or, uh, equiniquins? Something like that.
>Half of them had parts of an outfit on them. The one that really caught your eye was a green and brown dress with a saddle, apple shaped links keeping it all together.
>It reminds you of a rodeo queen.
>Rarity enters the room from behind you.
>”Tsk, I thought I told you to start taking those off.” She gestures at your clothes.
Sorry, that’ll be just 1 sec.
>Okay it was like 6 seconds. And you didn’t need to remove BOXER BRIEFS OF SWAG +20
>Rarity was staring in awe at you. It wasn’t the same look Applejack was giving you yesterday, it was a look of envy.
>”I had no idea human hands were so dexterous. It takes me at least 10 minutes to get out of a dress even with my magic.” She blushed when she said this, but only a little.
Yes! If I had to list all the reasons why humans are better than Unicorns, our ability to quickly take off clothes would be at the top!
>”Better? Oh now you’re just being silly! Stand up here, please.” She points to a pedestal in the middle of the room.
>The next hour is filled with the two of you jokingly arguing about who the better species is while she got the proper dimensions of your body.
>Rarity was a lot more fun to be around today.
>”Aaaand done!” She rolls up her measuring tape and floats some other stuff away.
Cool, that wasn’t as weird as I thought it would be.
>”Aww what’s wrong? Is the big, mighty human afraid to show just a little skin around a mare?” She says in a mocking tone.
It’s just my last exper-
>STOP RIGHT THERE MISTER THAT’S NONE OF HER BUSINESS
Aaaauhh, yeah a little. Heh.
>”No need to worry, darling. I am a professional and I aim to act like one.”
Good to hear!
>You put your clothes back on
>You know what, Rarity seems cool. You guess you should…
Hey Rarity, I was planning on eating lunch alone but that sounds pretty boring. I was thinking of getting a few ponies together for something nice.
>”And you would like me to join?” She’s understandably confused.
Nah, I just wanted to tell you about it.
>”Oh, fine! I wanted to eat alone anyway!” She magics in a sofa and jumps on it. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll just be here, alone, with no friends.”
>You can’t help but chuckle, it’s quite a performance.
>”If you ever change your mind, you can find me here, alone, with my,” She takes in a deep breath and changes position. Then she whispers, “Loneliness…”
>Oh god, you’re so close to losing your shit. You have to evacuate ASAP.
Alright, I’ll swing by if I do. See ya, Rarity.
>She drops the act, “Bye Anoooonnn~”
>You leave the boutique feelin’ good. That whole thing went better than expected.
>And the group lunch or whatever sounds refreshing. Everyone likes everyone else a little more with food in their mouths.
>But that means you need to get more ponies to tag along.
>The day is only getting started and you have plenty more shit to do.
>Next stop, Fluttershy’s cottage.
---
The Cottage


>Edge of Ponyville
>The sun was now high in the sky. Not quite noon but getting close.
>Fluttershy’s cottage just came into view.
>You were beginning to second guess visiting her.
>You have so much to thank her for. If it weren’t for her you might be dead.
>But she’s so afraid of yoFUCK
>SHIT, SOMETHING JUST HIT YOU IN THE BACK. HARD!
>A PAIR OF LIMBS WRAP AROUND YOUR THROAT.
>YES YOU’RE THINKING IN CAPS LOCK HOLY SHIT THAT HURT.
>WHY ARE YOU BEING CHOKED????
>FUCK, WHAT IS ON YOUR BAC K.
>HOLD UP.
>JUST…
>You fall backwards, making sure to land on whatever is latched to your back.
>You hit the cobble road with a deafening SMACK.
>Your attacker loses its grip… Shit it’s probably dead.
>Catching your breath you slowly get to your feet to see what wanted you dead.
>Rainbow Dash?
>She was obviously a sore loser but this was a little too much.
>She’s out cold with a little nosebleed.
>You don’t know how bad she’s hurt. She needs medical attention.
>Fluttershy! Fluttershy has a ton of pets, maybe she knows a things or two about taking care of injuries.
>You sling Rainbow Dash over your shoulder and jog to Fluttershy’s cottage.
>That plan doesn’t make sense, go to the hospital.
>But Fluttershy’s place is closer.
>God damn you’re lazy
>Well you’re gay
>No you’re gay
>We’ll pick this up later, we’re at the front door.
>No, god damn it she can wait.
>Knock knock
>”Who is it?”
It’s Anon, Rainbow Dash is hurt. She needs help.
>The door swings open, you get a good look at Fluttershy’s face for the first time.
>She isn’t shivering, she’s not curled up in fear, she’s not trying to hide behind her hooves or hair.
>She’s concerned for her friend and that’s all that matters right now.
>She ushers you in, asking questions at a million miles a minute.
>”Is she okay? How did that happen? Why is she bleeding? Would you like a glass of water?”
Yes.
>”Oh, um, okay.” She flutters into the next room, still asking herself questions.
>You now realize just how small everything is. Your head damn near touches the ceiling.
>You set Rainbow down on a coffee table and sit next to it.
>Fluttershy flies back into the room, small glass of water in her hoof. You’ll never get used to that.
>”Here you go Anon.” She hands you the glass. “What hap-“
>You dump the glass of water on Rainbow’s face. She shoots up, sputtering and shaking her head.
>Haha you can’t believe that worked.
>Rainbow turns to you, “What was that for?!”
You attacked me for no reason.
>”Did not!”
Oh, well where I come from, choking someone is not a friendly gesture.
>”I know that, I was just trying to see how tough you were!”
>Rainbow Dash was obviously a competitive Pegasus.
Why?
>”I don’t know! Maybe I just thought you needed to know just what us ponies are capable of!”
… You’re mad about that stupid rap battle.
>”No.”
Yeah you are.
>”No!”
You totally are. You’re so mad.
>Fluttershy chipped in, “But Rainbow Dash, you WERE mad after you lost.”
>Rainbow Dash snarls at Fluttershy. She squeaks and backs away.
>”Fine!” Rainbow Dash looks back at you. “Rematch!”
What? No way, that whole rap battle shit was so dumb.
>”Not that! I want a wrestling rematch!”
Is that what you were trying to do? It felt like you were trying to hug me.
>If she wasn’t mad before, she was now.
Besides, I’ve already won once and I wasn’t even trying.
>”That was dumb luck!”
Whatever! I’m sure Fluttershy wouldn’t appreciate us wrestling right outside her cottage anyway.
>”Actually I wouldn’t mind if Anon, or, um, you two roughhoused a bit.”
>”Ha! It’s two-to-one! You don’t have a choice, human.”
I have a name, you know.
>”Yeah yeah.” Rainbow Dash lifts you by the collar and drags out outside.
>Fluttershy anxiously follows.
>Rainbow lets go of your collar once she’s pulled you to an open area.
>She land approximately 10 feet in front of you.
>”You ready, human!?”
>You try to pay attention to Rainbow Dash. You really try.
>But Fluttershy won’t stop staring at you. You see a mixture of fascination and fear in her eyes.
>It’s also a little scary. Scary enough so you wouldn’t hear Rainbow say “Go!”
>BAM! She hits you like a bullet right in the chest.
>You’re down, chest hurts, head hurts. “See, easy!”
>She then proceeds to sit on your stomach, not worried about any resistance whatsoever.
>Oh hell no.
>You reach for her. She attempts to take to the air.
>She’s fast but your reach is long.
>You get a hand over her body, stopping all her movement.
>Your arm comes down.
>THEN YOU SLAM DUNK HER OVERCONFIDENT ASS ON TO THE GROUND!
>THE LOONY TOONS WIN 78-77. THE MONSTARS ARE GOING BACK TO THEIR FUCKING ALIEN PLANET OR WHATEVER.
>What the fuck she’s conscious. You’re no Randy Savage but that impact would knock out anyone… anyp0ny you know.
Are you okay? That was pretty rough.
>She just groans and rolls on her back. You’ll take that as a “yes.”
>You’re able to sit up but you sure as hell don’t want to stand right now.
>”Oh my gosh!” Fluttershy springs into action. “Anon are you okay?!”
>What.
I’m fine, go help Rainbow Dash.
>She ignores you. “Where does it hurt?” Her hooves are all over you now.
Fluttershy what are you doing? Stop it.
>She finds the spot on your chest. “Is this it?” Then proceeds to put pressure on it.
OW, YES!
>”Oh no! We have to treat your injuries immediately!” She takes your shirt in her mouth and begins to yank.
>It’s kind of cute, actually. It reminds you of a dog tugging on a rope toy.
Fluttershy, stop! This is my only shirt, you’ll ruin it.
>She snaps out of… whatever it was she was in.
>Her eyes are full of guilt, she’s circling her hoof on the ground. You know exactly what she’s doing.
>”I-I’m sorry, anon…”
>THEN WHY IS IT WORKING HNNNNG
Don’t worry about it.
>You turn your attention to Rainbow once more.
>She’s staring at you two, just as confused as you are.
You okay there?
>”Yeah,” Her voice is pretty raspy; “I’m more worried about Fluttershy though. Hehe.” She somehow squeezed out that laugh. You couldn’t help but join.
>Fluttershy tries to hide her blush behind her hooves but fails miserably.
>It takes a minute but Rainb- Fuck it you’re calling her RD. RD manages to push herself up to her rump.
So what kind of wrestling was that?
>”I could ask ya’ the same thing, Anon.” If one good thing came out of this, that was it. With RD, calling you by your own name was a sign of respect. You think.
>”So are you up for round 2?”
Noooooo…
>”Me neither. You busy today?”
A little, do you have lunch plans?
>”Yeah I planned on eatin’ some lunch. Do you have anything else in mind?” She gives you a sly smile.
Yeah I wanted to get some ponies together for lunch. I owe a few of ‘em for helping me survive my first few days in Equestria.
>RD’s smile vanishes.
>Oh shit the reason you came here.
Fluttershy, I almost forgot! Would you like to join us?
>”… Us?”
Well so far it’s just Rarity and… Did you want to go, RD?
>”Yeah, sounds like a blast.” What’s with the sarcasm?
>”Well... I guess that sounds nice. Where would we eat?”
>Uh… Wow you didn’t think of that.
I don’t know, is there a park around here?
>RD pipes in, “No but there are a ton of good picnic spots.”
>She does a good job of making it sound boring. She’s right, a picnic it does sound boring.
>Fluttershy doesn’t seem to think so, “Oh I would love a picnic! I could prepare a basket if you’d like.”
>Once again you’re up against a wall. 0 bits. You don’t like handouts but what can you do?
Yeah that’d be great. I plan on inviting Twilight and Pinkie as well, so pack for 6 if that’s not a problem.
>”Oh, no. Not at all.” She put on a cute, no, the cutest smile.
Cool, so where should we have it?
>”I’ll find us the PERFECT spot,” RD sounds more amped.
Alright, should we all meet up somewhere?
>”Don’t worry about it, I’ll find you! You’re hard to miss, Anon. Hehe.”
Great! Sounds like a plan, any questions?
>Fluttershy raises her hoof.
Uuuhhh, yes Fluttershy?
>”May I invite another friend?”
Absolutely, anyp0ny I know?
>”I think you know Applejack… Don’t you?
>Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

---
The Library


>”Oooh!~ Honey, come out here, quick! The human is here.” Mrs. Cake says as you approach the counter.
>Sugarcube Corner was easily the sweetest, heh, place in Ponyville.
>Everyp0ny in the store had a smile on their face.
>The owners were kind. The food was fresh and delicious. Shit, even the building looked edible.
>And the display case.
>Oh my god that display case.
>Never have you seen cakes look so rich. How did these ponies do it?
>Another pony in an apron walks out of the kitchen.
>”Well hello there!” He extends a hoof over the counter. “My name is Mr. Cake! How ‘bout you, mister?”
Anon, it’s a pleasure to meet you, sir!
>”Likewise. Is there anythin’ I can help you with?”
Yes, actually. I’m looking for Pinkie Pie and I was told she has living arrangements here.
>The Cakes droops their heads a little. Mrs. Cake is the first to speak.
>”I’m sorry, Anon but, she had to move out a few days ago.”
What? Why, did something happen?
>”No, it’s not her fault, it’s just the slow season is coming and with the twins around we can’t afford her. We had to lay her off.”
>Mr. Cake steps in, “We told her she could stay until she found a new place but she just up n’ left a couple nights ago.”
Oh, do you know where she is now?
>”’Fraid not.”
>The line behind you is growing impatient.
Alright then, thanks for the help.
>You do your best to keep a smile on your face, bringing a frown into this place seems like blasphemy.
>But you ditch it the instant you’re outside.
>Pinkie Pie was a victim on the economy, like so many from where you came.
>She was offered a place to stay until she could find employment.
>But she turned it down, there could be several reasons why she did and all you can do is guess.
>But the harshness of homelessness got to her within the next two days.
>It had to have, why else would she sleep at a stranger’s house? Not to mention, that stranger was a member of an unknown species.
>And then you told her to leave.
>Damn, you feel awful about that. Had you known, you would have let her crash with you.
>Hopefully you can find her before the day ends. The last thing you want for your friend is to feel alone.

>Knock knock. God damn you’re going to grind your knuckles to the bone with all this knocking today.
>The door to Twilight’s Library opens.
>You look down. Waaaaay down.
Hey Spike.
>”Anon…”
>You squat down so neither of you have to strain your necks.
Dude, you CANNOT still be upset over a few days of neglect.
>”What if I am?”
Then, well, I’m sorry. I didn’t have much of a choice in the matter.
>”… Yeah I know. I guess having a few days off chore duty wasn’t so bad either.”
Yeahaaa, I hear that!
>You raise your hand for a high-five.
>He has no idea what that means. “Uhm. What’re… What’s that?”
You’re kiddin’ me! Slap it, bro. Don’t leave me hangin’!
>He promptly does so. “Hehe, humans are weird.”
Tell me about it. Is Twilight in, today?
>”She’s in every day.” Spike stands aside, allowing you in.
>The Library is much cleaner than you remember it being. It really did suffer without Spike.
>Twilight trots in from another room.
>”Anon! Did you come here for-“
No.
>She appearifys a quill and rolled up scroll. “Are you s-“
>You go Janikowski on that fuckin’ quill.
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
>Her face crumples a little. “Then why are you here?”
>Your original intention was to borrow a few books on Equestrian History, and then it was to see if she was up for some lunch or a gay picnic or whatever.
>Now you’re just worried about Pinkie Pie.
Have you seen Pinkie Pie today?
>”No, why?”
She lost her job and home with the cakes and I’m worried.
>”I… had no idea.”
>Another knock at the door, it opens before Spike gets to it.
>Rainbow Dash strides in, “I knew you’d be here, Anon. So what’s takin’ so long?”
That was fast.
>”You don’t know me very well, do ya? Everything I do is fast”
>She really emphasized the ‘Fast.’
>”What are you two talking about?” Twilight asks.
>”Anon is throwing some lame picnic. Can’t say I mind free food but it’s gonna be boooooring.”
Not anymore, we need to find Pinkie. Form groups of two and spread o-
>Twilight shoves a hoof to your mouth. “Calm down, Anon. Pinkie Pie is not hard to find. She’s not exactly…”
>Spike: “Quiet?”
>RD: “Shy?”
Subtle?
>”Yeah. If anything, a little party would draw her out.” Twilight puts her hooves together, she has a malevolent grin on her face. “And the picnic is the perfect place to do it.”
>The three of you fearfully look at Twilight.
Are… you going to murder her?
>”No! Wait here one second!”
>Twilight runs back into the room she came out of. You can hear several heavy objects being moved.
>”AHA!” She walks into the room again, levitating a bag of…
Balloons? Seriously? That’s it?
>RD nudges you, “If it weren’t Pinkie Pie I’d have the same reaction.”
>”I figure if we put up enough balloons, she won’t be able to resist!”
>”I think she actually might be trying to murder her, after all.” Spike whispers.
>You and RD snicker.
>Twilight glares at the three of you, “This will work, trust me!”
You three know her better than I do. If you think this will work then I won’t object.
>Twilight tosses to you bag of balloons. “Good, now start blowing those up.”
Don’t we need helium?
>The three of them stare at you in confusion.
They can teleport halfway across the world, but they didn’t know what helium was.
>Great.
>Spike already has 3, make that 4, done.
>And they’re floating. What the hell?
Spike, do you exhale helium or something else lighter and oxygen?
>”What are you talking about?”
Those balloons shouldn’t be floating.
>”Why not?”
It’s just not how things are supposed to work. Here, watch.
>You blow one up, tie off the end, and let it go.
>It floats to the ground, just like a balloon should do.
See!
>”Woah, Anon. Humans are kinda freaky.”
>No you’re freaky. All this shit is freaky. Why is everything I learned in school invalid here? I hate this, this is stupid.
Yeah, uh, I need to get Rarity anyway. I’ll be back in 15.
>Spike scoffs, “Lucky.”

---
The Picnic


>You ring the bell of the Carousel Boutique for the second time today.
>”One minute!” Rarity’s voice echoes from up the stairs.
>SEVERAL MINUTES later Rarity trots down.
>She’s wearing a yellow sundress, linked in the front with a purple gem. She’s also taken the time to lace her tail with flowers.
>Easily the most notable part of her ensemble is her yellow hat. It had to be more than twice the size of her head. A blue ribbon sprouts from the top of a handful of flowers along the rim.
>”So, do I look fabulous, or what?”
Haha, you do. I think it may be a bit much.
>”Not at all! It’s a beautiful spring afternoon and I intend to be just as beautiful.”
>You hate to admit it to yourself but, yeah, Rarity was one beautiful Pony.
>Pretty was an understatement and cute was an insult. Rarity was a pleasure to look at, she made sure of it.
>”Isn’t that right, darling?”
>And she wanted to hear it.
Err, Yeah… You’re totally, you know. Yeah!
>She was having fun, making you squirm.
>Rarity titters lightly, ”Maybe you can think of those words you’re looking for on the way, dear.”
Aha, yeah. Right.
>You and Rarity made your way towards the Library, Rarity trying to wrench that word out of your mouth every step of the way.
>But you’re not going to give it to her. Rarity is beautiful by definition but, if you were to call someone beautiful, back home, it would normally imply some sort of affection.
>You like Rarity but not that kind of ‘like’.

>”Hey, you two!” RD calls from the sky.
>You and Rarity were only a few steps away from the Library door before RD found you.
>”We’re settin’ up by the school! Meet ya there!”
>Wait, Rainbow Dash. Don’t leave me alone with-
>And she’s gone.
>”… Tsk, where was I?” Oh no. OH NO!
>Rarity notices your ‘not-so-ecstatic’ attitude towards the topic.
>”Erm, uh, so… Humans like clothes?”
>She’s grasping at straws for a topic but it’s better than listening to her talk about herself.
Yeah, almost every human does.
>”Oh, how I envy you! Ponyville does not have any appreciation for High Fashion!”
>She continues to ask about fashion from your world. The topic isn’t nearly as grueling as you thought it would be.
>You tried your best to explain casual attire to Rarity but, she doesn’t understand.
>It’s either go big or go home with this mare.
>The two of you reach the School, Fillies and Colts are playing a variety of games outside. You can recognize some games but others look Pony exclusive.
>You can see your destination a short walk past the school. The multi-colored balloons make it more than easy find.
>Rarity trots ahead and strikes up a conversation with Fluttershy while you soak in the environment.
>The field is devoid of anything but light-green grass, aside from the two trees you’ll be dining under. Your fine picnic spot is adorned with balloons in such a fashion you have trouble describing.
>Balloon Garden? Yeah, that fits.
>You turn your attention to the girls. To your relief, Applejack isn’t here.
>But, neither is Pinkie Pie
>Twilight and Rainbow Dash have joined the other’s conversation.
>You can hear Twilight whispering something under her breath before they all steal a glance at you, and then giggle.
>Welp, you’re pretty sure you know what they’re talking about.
>Spike sits off to the sides, having just finished hanging the balloons.
>Spike is way cooler than girl horses anyway, let’s go chill with this dude.
Hey, Spike, what’s up?
>”Huh? Oh, not much, I guess.”
Um…
>Come on, dude. There are tons of things you want to know about Dragons! And now there’s one sitting in front of you!
What exactly do you do for Twilight?
>Kill yourself.
>”Chores, mostly. I’m also her direct line to the princess but burping out letters everyday isn’t as fun as you’d think.”
>Well that’s boring.
>Two plates of what looks like lettuce sandwiches are placed in front of you and Spike.
>You turn t-HHHGGNFFFF
>”Afternoon, sugarcube.” Holy shit, when did Applejack get here?! “A-A-Ah mean, Anon.”
>She’s different today. She wasn’t staring at you hungrily, she’s sweating bullets. Is she nervous?
>You should be the one who is nervous!
>”Did ya happen ta get my letter this mornin’?
Yes…
>She’s now averting her eyes and rubbing her hooves together. She’s getting noticeable sweatier.
>”Which… uh, did ya read it?”
>Oh boy. Do you tell her you read a bunch of them? Do you even want to mention the one that said she would rape you without a second thought?
>But, she wrote so many letters.
>It doesn’t take a genius to notice she’s in an emotionally fragile state.
>So are you! She tried to rape you AND YOU WERE TELEPORTED TO A MAGICAL WORLD INHABITED BY TALKING PONIES NO LESS THAN 5 DAYS AGO.
>Oh god, what to do? What to do?
>”A-Anon?”
>You attention is brought back to her; you can see she is trying to hold tears back.
>Not fair…
Yeah, I did. And… Um. I accept your apology.
>She inhales sharply and trie, and fails, to hide a wide smile. “An’…?”
And, I guess, we could talk over dinner…
>She leaps at you, wrapping her forehooves around your neck. “Oh thank ya, Anon!”
>Your heartbeat races, you begin sweating, your muscles tighten. Her touch alone brings you back to what happened yesterday.
Applejack… please.
>She realizes the effect it has on you. “Ah, sorry.”
>She releases her grip.
>She proceeds to swipe Spike’s sandwich, eliciting a, “Hey!” before he stomps off to get another.
>She then trots over to your side, sits down, and chomps down on the sandwich.
>You look to your own. Blech, it’s just lettuce in there. No, onions, tomatoes, or mayo.
>Your stomach doesn’t care, judging by the deep growl it just made.
>”Heh, ya better eat up, Anon.”
>And you do, it tastes bland but it fills you up.
>Applejack chuckles as you horf it down.
>She’s actually kind of cute.
>Hey, remember when she tried to rape you? … That was pretty cute, though.
>Yeah, if she can keep her hooves off your dick this will work out well enough.
So, what exactly did you have in mind for dinner?
>”Oh! Ah darn near forgot! Jus’ come over ta’ Sweet Apple Acres aroun’ sundown. I’ll be watin’ in the barn.”
The barn?
>”Don’ worry, we haven’ had any livestock in there since the first few years after we built it!”
>Hey, as long as it doesn’t smell gross.
>”An’ we’d get some alone time.” She says in a hushed tone.
>You shoot a harsh look at her.
>”Alright, Ah get the message. Jus’ testin’ mah boundries, is all.”
Eyuck, just keep it in your pants tonight.
>”Anon, I don’ wear pants.”
I know, Applejack.