The day nopony has been waiting for

>Day I’m grump in Equestria.
>”I’m not so grump!”
>Get out of here, Twilight. This is my narrative.
>Twilicorn-
>That’s Princess Astrala Duskborn Sparkshine to you!
>...
>Twilicorn has been relentless in her persuit of your fetish.
>She’s worn down on your psyche to breaking point.
>Right now, you’re considering just letting her have her way with you.
>Well, ok. It’s not like you’ve been able to stop her so far.
>But it’s the principle that matters.
>Yet another day begins with you opening your eyes and staring straight into Twilight’s own purple ones.
>”Morning, lover.”
“There’s no love between us, Twilight.”
>”Would you like it if there was? I’ll go get Cadence!”
“NO! No. It’s fine, Twilight. Just let me get up.”
>You’ve really got to watch what you say around Twilight.
>One time you said you were hungry enough to eat a horse.
>You shudder at the thought.
>Twilight removes herself from your bed, where she was pinning you down with her hooves.
>You get up and brush past her on your way to the bathroom.
>To be honest, this has simply become routine now.
>You get up, she drools over you, you get on with your normal routine, albeit this time with an audience.
>You shit, shave and shower.
>Not shower, shit and shave like some weirdos.
>You’ve long since given up on trying to keep her out of the bathroom, so she just fogs up the glass of the shower with her heavy breaths.
>You try to ignore her lecherous stare.
>Jesus, it’s like you’re a married couple or something.
>You roughly open the swinging shower door, flinging her away into the wall.
>Of course, being an alicorn she’s immortal and thus can’t die from serious head trauma.
>But she can still damn well feel it.
>You smile as you walk past her staggering form.
>”Did someone get the licence plate of the cart that hit me...?”
>You get dressed, enjoying the brief respite that you gain from Twilight being dazed.
>She exits the bathroom and shakes her head to clear the last vestiges of dizziness from her mind.
>”Anooooooooon! You could have broken my horn!”
“No I couldn’t. You know that.”
>You’ve tried in the past many times.
>She giggles.
>”Awww... I wanted to see if you cared about me...”
>She tries to look cute.
>With her stupid horse face, it looks like she’s angry at you.
>That or she’s constipated.
>You simply raise an eyebrow in confusion and get downstairs for breakfast.
>Over a bowl of The Great and Powerful Trix, you discuss your plans for today with Twilight.
“So what have you got planned for me today, Twilight...?”
>Your words drip with lethargy and boredom mixed together.
>”Oh, well, I just recently looked on /d/...”
>Your anus clenches reflexively.
>What do you do?
>She’s probably got some kind of many-tentacled dickgirl waiting for you outside.
>The idea fills you with equal parts revulsion and lust.
“You know what, Twilight. I think I’ll pass on this one. You got me. I’m in love with you.”
>Hopefully now your torment will be over.
>Twilight simply looks at you, stunned.
>Her eyes grow to the size of dinner plates.
>A creeping grin spreads across her face.
>She freezes.
>You swear that in the back of her eyes you see a blue screen of death reflected in her corneas.
>Huh.
>You guess she wasn’t prepared to deal with that kind of-
>”YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES!”
>And now there’s a horse hopping around your room, breaking your shit.
>Same old, same old.
>Twilight is ecstatic.
>”Oh my gosh, Anon! I’m so happy! I love you too! I knew you’d come around eventually! I’d better write a letter to Celestia!”
>She summons a quill and paper.
>”Dear Princess Celestia, Today I learned that the way to a stallion’s heart is through his penis. That, and many, many accounts of >rape. Your faithful equal, Princess Astrala-”
>You snatch the scroll out of the air and shove it in your mouth.
>You chew it roughly and swallow.
>The parchment scratches your throat on its way to your stomach.
>But now that it’s in there, she won’t be sending it to Celestia.
>However, Twilight looks unfazed at your actions.
“Uh... Let’s just keep this on the down low, Twi. We don’t want to make a big song and dance about it.”
>Twilight grins maliciously.
>Her horn glows and she points it at your stomach.
>You burp.
>A plume of smoke escapes your gullet.
>It floats off on its way to Canterlot.
>Goddamn haxxy alicorns!
>”Nonsense, Anon! I’m so happy I want to shout it from the rooftops!”
>All of a sudden, you burp again.
>The feeling of parchment scraping your throat happens in reverse, as you vomit up a fully formed scroll.
>It has Celestia’s royal seal on it.
>You need to sit down.
>Twilight opens the scroll and reads its contents.
>”My faithful equal, Twilight Sparkle, I’m so happy to hear that you’ve found your prince. Now we can begin your official princess coronation! It shall happen today! See you there! Your eternal >rape mentor, Princess Celestia.”
>Oh no.
>Oh god no.
>If you knew that this would happen, you would never have said the things you did.
>You regret everything!
>You regret everything you’ve ever done!
>”You hear that, Anon? This is going to be the best day ever!”
>She said that about the gala.
>It wasn’t.
“Uh, can we just talk about this, Twilight?”
>”NO!”
>Her horn glows a brilliant white and suddenly you find yourself on a parade float in Canterlot.
>Throngs of ponies line the streets, cheering and waving to you as you slowly process down the roads.
>You try and hide your face.
>Maybe they won’t recognise the 6ft balding monkey?
>”ANON! ANON! ANON!”
>Seemingly, they do.
>”Don’t be shy, Anon! This is the day everypony’s been waiting for!”
>No.
>Nobody’s been waiting for this day.
>This is the worst day.
>This is the day it all ends.
>You slowly make your way through Canterlot to the steps of the gleaming white castle of the royal pony sisters.
>On the way there, you could have sworn you saw a pony that looked like Ron Paul.
>He was shaking his forehooves in the air and was wearing a tabard with “IT’S HAPPENING!” written on it.
>At least there’s one sane pony here.
>At the steps of the castle Luna, Celestia and Cadence meet you.
>You’re frog marched by Luna and Cadence up the red carpeted steps.
>You enter the grand hall of Canterlot castle to see yet more ponies gathered to celebrate your defeat.
>The rest of the mane six are gathered at the end of the walkway to see their Twilight.
>Fluttershy is quite clearly masturbating at the sight of you.
>You simply hang your head as you’re dragged to your fate.
>As you arrive at the end of the walkway with Twilight and the other alicorns, a human walks out from behind a curtain.
>She’s a blonde bimbo with a dazzling fake smile.
>She wears a sash with “Miss America 2013” printed on it.
>You still have no idea who she is or why you should care.
>She speaks.
>”Like, Anon-e-mouse, you have been, like, charged with loving this pony. How do you plead?”
“With both hands clasped together and down on both knees, m’lady.”
>”Then, like, I totally coronate princess whateverhernameis to be an alicorn princess!”
>The ponies erupt in cheering and jubilation.
>Pinkie literally explodes into a pile of confetti and streamers.
>Twilight suddenly grips you in between her hooves.
>She plants a big sloppy kiss on your lips.
>She tastes of grass and pocky.
>She releases you after a while and you pant heavily to get your breath back.
>That was awful.
>The blonde bitch talks again.
>You wish she would stop doing that.
>”And, like, as an extra bonus, so that the show stays the same, the rest of the mane six are, like, totally alicorns too!”
>A flash of light blinds you momentarily.
>You look to the rest of the mane six to see that, indeed, they have all gained wings and horns.
>Pinkie has even rematerialized to ascend as well.
>”Hurray! Now I can share Anon with all of you girls, too!”
>Your jimmies are rustling so hard that they set themselves alight.
“Please, Twily. What are you doing? STAHP.”
>”I’m sorry, Anon. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my studies, it’s that there are no brakes on the >rape train.”
>The horns of the mane six all glow in unison and you feel the familiar gut-wrenching displacement sensation that accompanies an unwilling teleportation.
>You find yourself in a dingy, dark room.
>It smells of sweet hay, sweat and tears.
>You turn around to see the mane six looking at you with disturbing grins on their faces.
>They’re all eyeing the prize.
>They pounce as one upon you.
>You spend the rest of your life in the >rape dungeon
>Fucking haxxy alicorns.