A Saint's Dream of a Sinner

The gentle tendrils of night had seeped onto the landscape, beginning to wrap their way into Polipo. The gentle boy yawned, as the ache of the previous battle began to set in, wincing at the cut made by that brutish Orog, and what was almost certainly a cracked rib from the hunk of earth lobbed at him by an enraged giant. Well... I suppose it was deserved. Damn Traxan and his scathing tongue. Groaning, he began to settle into his only slightly ragged bed, and began to make himself comfortable, the warm mutton and milk settling kindly into his all-too appreciative body. He was tired now, so very tired, and sleep would doubtlessly claim him quickly. At this moment, he was almost happy to have suffered through Traxan’s "lesson”, at least the bastard had tired himself out enough to the point where tonight would be a one filled with peaceful sleep, without obnoxious prattling in his ear. Sighing, his eyelids growing heavy, he thought to his talk with Nahia, unease settling in his core that was barely drowned out by his desperate need for rest. He hoped it would never come to it, but... could she really do it, if she had to? He hoped she could, that she would. And yet...

He had always wanted a big sister...

Polipo bolted upward with a start. It seems life has other plans for him, and that rest will have to wait. Groaning, he rose from his chair and... wait, chair? Fatigue gave way to confusion, as he rose from the rather comfortable leather and gaged his surroundings, before quickly wishing he didn’t. There were some minor details, he seemed to be in some sort of log cabin, there was a fire, a bear rug on the floor, and it was a snowy night outside. But these details paled in comparison to the green-eyed visage sitting across the room, smiling at him with a rictus grin. He was dressed in much the same way he was when he met Polipo for the first time, a long overcoat was draped over his body, with a slightly greying curled moustache and goatee plastering his face, his hair was wispy, and seemed to flow strangely as he sat, drink in hand.

“Relax boy. You’re just dreaming. Though, while this place is not real, I can assure you I am.” The older man spoke to the younger in the same way he often did, full of condescension and arrogance, yet a hint of paternal instinct that made Polipo sick whenever he detected it.

“I thought you had worn yourself out.” Polipo replied bluntly. Speaking too long with Traxan took a toll on his patience, and after today, he is not in the mood to chat. Not at all. The older man’s smile fell for a moment, a ghost of irritation dancing on his face before he regains his composure. “I did. This is where I come to relax and recuperate. I used to come to this cabin quite often in the winter. Or at least a cabin very much like this one. Memory is such a fickle thing, isn’t it, little Polipo?”

The purple haired boy grit his teeth, his hand tightening into a fist. “Can’t you just leave me alone? For one night? First you endanger my friends, then you make me watch as you kill yet another person! By the gods, can you just FUCK OFF!”. Traxan’s eyes widened, surprised. Polipo made no secret for his disdain of him, but him lashing out to this degree is unexpected. Taking a moment to allow the boy to breath, he takes a small breath and continues:

“Polipo. I brought you here for several reasons. But I see I have started this conversation incorrectly.” Traxan sighs, rubbing the bridge of his eyebrows for a moment, seemingly gathering the willpower for whatever he was about to say next. “Polipo, I am sorry for what I did today. I was... a little too brash. And I ended up disrupting our attack and putting us in danger. For that, I apologize, truly. You have my word that I will not do such a thing again.” There was a moment of stunned silence from Polipo, his anger melting away into utter bewilderment. Traxan had never, ever apologized for anything. Not even... that day. The boy opened his mouth to speak, but found himself wordless, unsure whether to accept the apology or not. Sensing his hesitation, Traxan continued.

“That was the most important thing I have to say. If that is all you care to hear, the door is right behind you. Leave, and you will enter a night of dreamless sleep. Or stay and listen to an old man and his advice. The choice is yours.”

Polipo stood up at once and made his way to the door. Without a word, he placed his hand on the door handle, but stopped himself before he turned it. Traxan actually apologized. This in itself was something incredible. Perhaps this trend will continue? Maybe, just maybe, he could change his ways. Sighing deeply, he strengthened his resolve and made his way back to his chair, regret immediately forming in his mind the moment he laid eyes on Traxan’s smug grin. “Alright. I’ll hear you out. But if I don’t like what you have to say, I’ll leave.” Polipo laid his terms out clearly. He was rarely this bold and forthcoming, but he had learned to restrain his timid nature whenever Traxan was involved. In return, the ex-criminal smiled more warmly than usual, and nodded his head. “Thank you. I will try not to take up too much of your time. Though, I suppose you don’t have much more to do now besides counting sheep.” He chuckled to himself, the absurdity of the situation amusing him, before taking a slow sip of his drink, and continuing.

“Today, I strove to teach you a lesson. When I drove your blade into that giant, I made you watch. I know you don’t like to kill, Polipo. But let me ease your mind a little, because, as sad as it may be for you, if you are insistent on galivanting around saving lives for a pittance, there are moments where you must kill. Be that an Orc, a Worg, a Giant, or even a Human. Sometimes you must take a life. I did not make you watch that giant die to be cruel. I did it to make you stronger.” Polipo gazed at Traxan silently, taking in his words. On the one hand, he wanted to scream at Traxan that he was wrong, that killing is wrong, that we should try and spare life whenever possible. On the other hand, he knew, as much as it unsettled him, that he spoke the truth. Killing creatures upset him greatly, but he knew that even if he had spared the giant, there was no cell to hold him. It would likely either continue its pillage and murder, or be killed by another member of the party, most likely that very angry dwarf. His unwillingness to kill was, ultimately, a weakness. Traxan gazed at him, aware he was thinking, and giving a small moment to quaff some more drink, before he went on.

“Your associates understand this. They understand it is a cruel necessity. Killing an orc who is pillaging a village is doesn’t make you cruel. I understand it will take some time for you to learn this, and longer still to apply it. Therefore, I must interfere sometimes, to speed up the process. You know I am being truthful, as I have told you many times, what is best for you is best for me. If we are to be stuck together, with you at the body’s helm, I am left with no choice but to make you the best helmsman possible.” Traxan paused, slightly irritated at the reminder of his current predicament, before smiling to himself. “In this sense, I am a better “friend” to you than your associates ever will be. You would do well to learn, Polipo, that all good relationships are mutually beneficial. You help them, they help you. You make think that those lovable misfits share your interests, and its possible, even likely, that they do. But you don’t know for a certainty. With me, you do. If you die, I die. If something bad happens to you, it happens to me. We are in complete symbiosis. Fascinating, isn’t it?”

“You’re wrong.” Polipo interjects, bluntly. “They are my friends. We protect each other because it is the right thing to do, and because we care for each other.” Traxan merely sighs at the interruption, as if it were only a matter of time before it happened. “Are you really so sure? It may seem that way now, Polipo, but what if things change? What then? What if Ikis, who has already expressed his annoyance with you, finds a dragon? And what if that dragon wants you and the others dead? Can you be so sure he would protect you then? Qi-Theos, as much as he may seem a good friend, would he really not sell your soul to the depths of Avernus to simply glimpse at the Artifacts of old? Bardric, well, you’ve seen the look in his eyes. The beast inside of him, what if it wins one day? I’m sure you’d taste just as good as any orc or goblin, if not better. Gauntlet, well, logic dictates his actions more than any of us. Who is to say he won’t decide the most logical action is our annihilation in that enigmatic mind of his? And even dear old Nahia, as much as she seems to care for you, would probably slit your throat and slice your belly open to save her dear little brother.”

Polipo’s eyes widened. He had heard his conversation with Nahia. He thoughts, with his energy spent and his inability to communicate, he would not be able to see through his eyes either. It seems he was wrong. Sensing the boy's distress, Traxan raised his hands defensively. “Yes, yes, I did hear. I understand your worry, dear boy, I do. But I assure you, I have no intention of taking over your mind. Being a passenger has proven to be quite the experience, and it's not one I'm entirely willing to give up. Even if I did somehow gain permanent control, I would probably only seek to separate our souls once again. I’ve come to quite enjoy your company, believe it or not. You might even say I’ve grown attached, absurd as it may seem. So, I very much doubt our resident serpent will ever have the need to strike us down. Though, I do wish you hadn’t told her not to trust me. I am no liar, Polipo.”

Stunned by this, all things considered, very calm reaction, Polipo sunk back into his chair, thinking. As horrible as Traxan could be, he was certainly reasonable at the present moment. He certainly didn’t approve of his view on the world, but he at least understood where he was coming from. His unwillingness to was certainly a burden on his friends, and one he would likely need to remedy. Soon, but not now. Satisfied that Polipo had calmed, Traxan finished the dregs of his drink, and spoke again.

“Make no mistake, Polipo, I am not telling you to abandon this party. They have proven most useful, and they are at the very least not currently malicious. I only urge you remember their true loyalties, and that you are cautious. Do not move use your neck to stop a blade for someone who would not do the same for you. I will not allow it.” Traxan’s eyes hardened for a moment, and the unspoken warning was not lost on Polipo, who nodded solemnly. Traxan, reasonable as he was being, still needed to protect himself, and that means protecting Polipo. There would be no sacrifices, that much was obvious. It would have bugged Polipo more, but truth be told, he was almost glad. He was... afraid to die.

“You are a fine young lad, Polipo. I can see you are on the path to true strength. The only question is this: Will you use your strength to impose your will on the world, or will you die like a dog for those who do not appreciate it. Like your father...”

Polipo sprung to his feet, moved forward and grabbed Traxan by the collar, his eyes wide with fury.

“DO NOT TALK ABOUT MY FATHER! I NEVER WANT TO HEAR HIS NAME PASS THROUGH YOUR LIPS! HE WAS A GOOD MAN!”

Unphased, Traxan responded. “Yes, yes he was. And look where that got him. Look where it got us. I know you understand, dear Polipo. But that is a conversation for another day. Taking guests is expending what little dregs of energy I had left. Time to rest.”

Polipo’s vision blurred, as the cabin began to drift away, and the dream dissolved in his mind. As he passed into true, dark sleep, he heard Traxan’s voice, softer than usual.

“For what it’s worth, Polipo, I am sorry about your father. But...”

“He left me no choice”