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hi jojo, i know sending an entire paragraph instead of goint "hey can i talk" is a little imposing but i really need to get my word in first in full.
i did say you can follow me back, because i really wanted to reconnect but there's something i seriously expect an apology for. i'm a little disappointed you may have forgotten. it may have seemed like a small thing to you at the time, but for me it sent me on a downward spiral that took months to recover from, and for at least two weeks i was seriously suicidal. around march of 2019 it seems like you had moved accounts because of me and zera's situation with aimcru and i realized but never really said anything, until one day you got back on your old account and dropped a nasty ass tweet directed towards me, it was very deliberate because it was just as i had gotten home from *something* (i don't remember if it was class or an appointment) and i had just gotten on
the transcript (i have a screenshot as well):
""man if you ditch a whole ass group of people that care for you and are willing to be patient with you then make yourself out to be the victim then idk what to tell you LMFAO"
yeah i don't know man. obviously you wouldn't do this now but i don't really want excuses or justifications, you hurt me very badly with this and i want an apology. when did i make myself out to be a victim? if it was vagues i made at the time, i told vincent the same thing and zera can confirm it. aim wasn't the only thing i was having trouble with and i don't really have to disclose who i was talking about other than saying it wasn't about any of you. why would i talk shit about the group when you and stitches were right there? and what was this about being "patient". i had a few breakdowns and suddenly everyone had come down on me calling ME ungrateful, telling me that they've all had enough of me and that they were "patient" with my recent bout mental breakdowns. yeah... i mean if that seemed like patience. i'm not angry with you right now but i want you to understand exactly why this sucked and why it hurt me so badly, i was treated like crap so i left. that's what happened. i don't want any claims of "well you made us sad by leaving" because i never asked for any extraneous apologies. i'm not asking for apologies for how i was mistreated during those last days because honestly daryl put everyone up to it because i had the guts to tell him to stop being condescending towards me. i was alone for almost an entire year and i had nothing but those words you dropped at me and hearing about stuff like how everyone gave up on me and almost no one had the intention of hearing me out if i did come back to explain myself. i want you to understand how my hair just fell out in clumps every day and how i had constant nightmares and how for months on end i'd just cry myself to sleep because everything was just so much. it might really seem like nothing or a small thing, that tweet, but it ruined my outlook and i remember that day all hope of everything work out just crashed. i know being *in* the group is awful because i was there too. but no one knows how much i was this close to just giving up permanently?? its like. i just want an apology and i want a sincere one. if you can't and think that i had somehow hurt you at the time and that i caused some kind of anguish, which i did not, and that somehow justifies this then it's best to simply cut ties. i want this to work out very badly but after much thought i can't really move forward with you until you take responsibility. please understand. i'm seriously seriously not angry at you now or holding any grudges but just like, for the peace of my own heart. and i think it would do you some good as well, we would be 100% burying the hatchet.