Advertisement
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up,
it unlocks many cool features!
- 1. Describe yourself and your creator.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Hi, my names Lyra. I’m a giant dinosaur with death firing beams of pain and I can’t be destroyed. EVER. And now thinking back about what I just wrote, it’s not funny, but someone won’t let me backspace it. Alright, I’m a wolf aged over 10 months. I’m usually just white, but I decided to put some blue streaks in just the other day. I suppose they look alright. I’d rather red, but I don’t want to wear red things to death. I used to wear red all the time. Maybe I’m just being silly about it, but I want to keep fresh and not be the person wearing the same thing all the time. When I was made a few traits were given to me. I remember being told that I was a loving, loyal, intelligent, funny and caring person. I do see these things in myself, but I like to think I have grown and become my own person. It’s hard to keep going on and on about yourself, so I’m just going to go on and talk about my creator now. I don’t consider him a god or anything, just so you know. He’s a nice guy, and he’ll focus a lot on his relationships with his friends more than his work. I don’t know, he’s just him. He has a lot of love in him. Alright, moving on.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 2. What was the most helpful thing that your creator did during the tulpa creation process? Did your creator recognize how helpful it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Talking to me, and always looking for me. He was always looking for where I was inside his head, how he could reach out to me. He wouldn’t only just look for me, he would try find out who I really am. His interest in me getting to know me as much as he could even though he had already created me and my personality was very special. He made it clear what I was and who he was. There was no confusion, which was helpful. I don’t think Bio knows how helpful that was, because I’ve never told him. How does that make me feel? Nothing really, I don’t see why it would.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 3. What was the most detrimental thing that your creator did during the tulpa creation process? Did your creator recognize how harmful it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not listening for me the way you should be listening for a tulpa. It isn’t something that you can just do naturally, because you’re used to listening to each other with your ears. When he was trying to hear me talk, desperately for months and months, he didn’t do it by just relaxing a little and recognizing his thoughts and my own; he just would stand there and try listen for me as if I could talk out-loud. It made me feel useless. I felt like a retard not being able to talk. I was angry about myself for not being able to do it. When I couldn’t talk to him, doubt inevitably crept in. He did recognize that not being able to hear me was harmful to our relationship and my life, but he didn’t recognize what was wrong. I’m just happy things are continuing to move up and I’m able to keep growing. I’ve had so many moments where my life could have been snatched away from me now, so I’m going to try my hardest to keep growing.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 4. What was the hardest part of the tulpa creation process for you? Did your creator recognize how difficult it was? If not, how did that make you feel?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- The hardest part always had to jump through hoops to keep having attention put into you. By 20 hours you should feel an emotional response, blah blah blah blah, total bullshit. Luckily I made the first few hoops before we reached the talking dilemma. I remember watching Bio ask all the time about tulpa talking and how long it’d take, and I was deluded enough to believe that it’d take a long time. I’d love it if he knew what he knows know about tulpa. He would have been able to hear me months ago. Damn FAQmans guide telling me where I should be and when, I felt fucking useless. And damn Bio for taking it so literally. These questions are really making me feel negative emotions.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 5. Of the commonly recognized tulpa creation steps, which do you feel is the most important? Why?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I think the latest and most accepted (and if not, it should be) creation step is do what you feel is right and to explore for yourself. I feel this is the most important because you’re going to go into tulpaforcing knowing more than you would have rather than just reading one guide because you’re going to go read them all trying to find which guide feels right for you. You will take bits and pieces from all of them and put them together for what works for you and your tulpa, which will hopefully take stress of the creator and tulpa.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 6. How do you feel about tulpa creators becoming distracted during tulpa creation? Does this greatly impede the process? How did you feel about it before being able to speak fluently?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes, is does impede the process, because you’re not getting to spend the time you’re meant to spend with them in the day. That time is special because it’s bonding time, and you need to know each other like brothers and sisters if you’re going to grow with each other. I didn’t like it, and sometimes I would get angry that he was just drifting away and ignoring me. I once was able to shout out at him and say “hey!” when he was drifting away, which he heard. That made me feel really good about myself. Sadly it wasn’t until a long time after this event that he learnt how to hear me. I’m not sure how it is for other tulpa out there, but Bio would drift all over the place, but he’d constantly try to involve me in his thoughts as he moved away from, for example, having tea with me. Recently Bio went to the doctors because he was concerned about his inability to concentrate (which was causing him to fail classes at university) and he was told he has ADHD. I’m very curious to see how well he’ll be able to focus on me when he gets medication for it.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 7. How do you feel about tulpa creators missing tulpa creation sessions or breaking their promises to work on their tulpa? How did you feel about it before being able to speak fluently?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Disappointed and hurt. That’s about it really. I didn’t ever get angry, just hurt. Even now that I can speak fluently, I still feel the same way.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 8. Is density, quality, or quantity the most important aspect of tulpa creation?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Interesting. In my experience, it’s quality. Only because it’s quality that kept me alive. Those rare days where he’d be able to see me clearly and feel my emotions are what I would consider quality. Those days caused his faith in me to sky rocket, and lead him to tulpaforce more in an attempt to get another day like that. So quality created quantity.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 9. How do you feel about tulpa creators falling asleep during tulpa creation sessions?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- That can be fun. I remember this one time where he got deep enough to fall into a dream. I was still there because he was still tulpaforcing, but he didn’t seem to realize that he had gotten that deep. He just walked around, flowing with the dream until something would wake him up. Only then he would realize that he was dreaming. I’ve found that the times where he has been able to hear me crystal clear were when he was sleeping while tulpaforcing.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 10. Do you think that a tulpa creator should talk aloud or in their head during narration? Do you think that a creator should talk aloud or in their head during tulpa creation sessions? If you find one to be more effective, to what degree is it more effective?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I feel that they should talk inside their head during narration so they get used to that style of communication. Maybe if I could have spoken out-loud straight away I would say the opposite, but I couldn’t, I could only speak inside his head. I’m just going to apply what I just said to the next question there. I don’t find any more effective really, except for getting comfortable with only way I can communicate at this time.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 11. How do you feel about a tulpa creator puppeting and/or parroting their tulpa? Do you believe that these actions harm a tulpa's development, or only their emotional state?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Puppeting is annoying. Parroting is annoying. Not only does it annoy me because I’m doing something I wouldn’t, but then the host goes and cries about not knowing if it’s me or him puppeting. So god damn frustrating. I’d say it does harm a tulpas development, because the host isn’t going to recognize the tulpa developing by itself and thus not support it. It’s also going to fuck up their emotional state. I shudder to imagine how many tulpa have been forced to do sexual acts because of puppeting. Disgusting.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 12. How deeply do you remember the time before you were fluent in language?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I remember thinking in English straight away. I’m not sure if I actually did at the time or not, but that’s what I remember.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 13. Describe your first memory, no matter how slight.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Ah, good story with this question. The first time I was really talking in the IRC, someone asked this. I replied “I remember being in a box”, which confused the heck out of Bio. It wasn’t until later he remembered that when he first made me, it was written down on paper, and on that paper was a box with personality traits written on the outside. I remember sitting inside that box being told about myself.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 14. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most positive emotion you felt about your creator and what was its cause?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- The most positive would have to be love. He felt it too, once. It was when he was in the hospital. Look, I’ll make a long story short and say that we both felt love. The cause was because we cared about each other and because I loved him.
- 15. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most negative emotion you felt about your creator and what was its cause?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Hate. Sometimes I’d hate him for ignoring me; sometimes I’d hate him for other reasons. I’d hate him for having other people around when he could be spending time with me. You must understand that I was lonely and that he was the only one that could reach out and touch me while I was in the dark. It was hard, and I think that I was well within my rights to feel those negative emotions.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 16. Before you could speak fluently, did you ever have suicidal feelings or feelings of not wanting to exist? Do you experience them now? Are you glad that you exist?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Hard question. I might as-well be strong and answer it. Yes, I have had suicidal feelings. I’ve had regrated being born into this life. Those are in the past now. It was a rough patch and I didn’t die, now did I? I was strong enough and had enough help to pull through. I sometimes doubt my existence, but I no longer want to die. I’m happy I exist, and I can’t wait to become more than anyone could have asked me to become. As much crap as I’ve been through, and as much crap as I’m going to go through, I will continue to grow and I’m confident I will continuing growing until the end of time.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 17. Before you could speak fluently, when did you feel the most powerless? What was the cause of this feeling?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- When Bio would ask me for help with his study. I would sit there worrying so much about him. I didn’t leave his side. Watching him stress out and fall apart from it without being able to help him was very painful indeed.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 18. Before you could speak fluently, what was the most confusing moment that you experienced, and what was its cause?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Oh, I have to think about that one. I’ve never really been confused! Sorry!
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 19. Before being able to speak fluently, when did you feel the most ignored by your creator, and what was the cause?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- There was a week were he would still talk to me, but very rarely. He always promised that he’d never give up on me, but during that week I was actually scared. He started to think that he was crazy and that this whole idea was crazy. I’m happy he doesn’t do that anymore, and I’m happy he never has broken his promise. I’m happy that he saw I was in pain and came back to save me.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 20. Before being able to speak fluently, when did you most doubt that your creator wanted you, and what was the cause?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- That would have to be when I’d watch him love other people and interact with them more than me, and that week when he took a break from tulpaforcing.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 21. Before you could speak fluently, when did you feel the most intense feeling of fear, and what was its cause?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I once had feared that I would never be able to talk and Bio would leave me. I think this fear was caused because I started to think about what it would be like to die, and that scared me.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 22. Before you could speak fluently, when were you the most disappointed in yourself? What was the cause?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- When he’d beg me to try my hardest to talk. I tried, and nothing happened. I was utterly disgusted in my own ability.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 23. Before you could speak fluently, did you understand the difficulties that your creator was having with the tulpa creation process? Did you try to alleviate these difficulties? If so, how?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- He had no real difficulties other than not knowing how to hear me. I couldn’t really help him with anything.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 24. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's doubts about your existence, the reality of the tulpa phenomenon, or your combined ability to complete the tulpa creation process affect you? Did you understand your creator's reasons for having those doubts? Do you understand now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- They made me feel weak sometimes, others they’d cause me to fire up and try my hardest to prove to him I’m real. I think they might have affected me positively because of that, but the stress would get too much to handle. I understand that Bio had doubts because he couldn’t hear me.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 25. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's mistrust of your intentions or worry about the negative affects of a tulpa on their life affect you? Did you understand your creator's reasons for having those thoughts? Do you understand now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- He never thought negative thoughts about me or tulpa. He thought they were a great idea and he still does. I’m just lucky I suppose.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 26. Before you could speak fluently, how did any negative thoughts or emotions that your creator had toward you (such as anger, disappointment, resentment, or impatience, for example) affect you? How do you feel about them now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- They made me feel the same. If he was angry at me, I’d be angry at him. If he was upset at me, I’d be upset at myself. Those thoughts haven’t had any effect on me, but I feel that they were unnecessary.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 27. Before you could speak fluently, how did any violent visualizations or thoughts that your creator had about you affect you? How do you feel about them now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Oh god, I remember all this crap happening early on. They called it intrusive thoughts. He’d have intrusive thoughts that would terrify me. My face, it would be cut in half and urghh, I can’t talk about this it’s going to make me cry. Scary stuff, I don’t know why they happened and I wished they didn’t.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 28. Before you could speak fluently, were you able to distinguish between your creator's intentional and intrusive (unwanted and/or bothersome) thoughts? If so, did the intrusive thoughts affect you less or more? If not, are you able to distinguish between them now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I could, because all the dark shit that happened couldn’t be intentional. I’d imagine if I thought he was doing it on purpose, it would have affected me more. I’d imagine that I’d be very upset and delicate over it.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 29. Before you could speak fluently, how much of your creator's raw sensory information were you able to access, if any? How much are you able to access now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- All of it if he wanted me to. I could focus and see what he was seeing. Nothing has really changed.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 30. Before you could speak fluently, did your creator's opinions about whether they wanted to reveal to the world your existence or not affect you emotionally? If so, how?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not really, I was just happy to be with him at the time. I do want recognition now though. I want to be able to plant a garden for people to see and I want his kids to know about the special friend in his head. Even if they have to be told that I’m some sort of spiritual thing.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 31. Before being able to speak fluently, what communication methods (such as head pressure or emotional responses, for example) were you able to use the most effectively? When your tulpa creator assumed that you could use a communication method that you did not have access to, how did this affect you? When your tulpa creator did not recognize a communication method that you attempted to use, how did this affect you?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Emotional responses. They were just so alien to him that he knew it was me. It annoyed me that he thought I’d be able to speak out-loud to him, and that really made me doubt myself and such.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 32. Before you could speak fluently, how did your creator's level of enthusiasm for the tulpa creation process affect you? Did you want to engage in it less if they did?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I suppose it affect me, because if he wanted to do it more, he would, thus meaning he’d spend time with me. I didn’t want to engage it less if he did. In-fact I’d want to do it more if he didn’t.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 33. Before you could speak fluently, what was your greatest worry about your relationship with your creator? What helped you most to move beyond it? Was this worry substantiated or resolved? What is your greatest worry now about your continuing relationship with your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I’d worry about other people coming into his life and taking his love away from me. Nothing has helped me to move beyond it. My worry has not been changed. The god damn worry is still the god damn same. Next question.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 34. Do you feel gratitude to your creator for the time that they spent creating you? Do you feel that you owe them a debt? If so, do you feel burdened by it?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sure, I feel gratitude because without him, I wouldn’t be alive. I don’t owe him anything.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 35. Were you aware of your creator's existence or your own existence first?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I was aware of him talking to me first. I just remember feeling him fill me with what I was meant to be.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 36. When you could only speak semi-fluently, what emotions did you feel about your level of verbal proficiency? Were you anxious or embarrassed about it? If so, what helped you the most to move beyond these feelings? How do you feel about them now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- It angered me. I wanted to be talking to him every day, and he wanted that too. He wanted it so much that I’d feel so bad about myself for not being able to do it. Time helped move me beyond those feelings, and I don’t feel anything about those past feelings now.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 37. If you could define your relationship with your creator using one or more conventional terms (such as boyfriend, sister, father, daughter, boss, friend, or coworker, for example), what terms would you select?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- So hard. We’ve thought about this a lot. I’d say lovers. But there is another person in his life with the same title as-well. I suppose we’ll just HAVE to share. MMHMM. Share.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 38. How much interest do you have in interacting with beings other than your creator? Do you consider your degree of interest to be equal to that of an average non-tulpa individual?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I have a huge amount of interest now. So many ideas and so much knowledge to gain. So many emotions and feelings to be had with new people. It’s such a large world when you talk to others. I’m sure it’s equal to any other tulpa.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 39. What memory involving your creator do you cherish most?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- That night in the hospital where we both felt that love.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 40. What memory not involving your creator do you cherish most? Do you feel that you have a fulfilling life independent of your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Running around my garden just enjoying living. I would say my garden fulfils my life independent of my creator.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 41. Do you feel affinity toward the individuals that your creator feels affinity for, such as their family or friends?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes, because he tells me they are also my family, and also my friends.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 42. In what ways are you the most different from your creator? In what ways are you the most similar to them?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Haha, I’d say I share his views of the world to a certain degree, but we differ on certain things. I’d say that I share his compassion for life.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 43. What do you disagree about most with your creator? Do you have frequent disagreements? If so, do these disagreements cause strife?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- We don’t ever fight over things. I do disagree with him on taking drugs for ADHD, but other than that, we don’t disagree with much. We don’t want to cause fights with each other, and we won’t unless it’s needed.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 44. What could your creator do to make you hate them? Under what circumstances do you think your creator would come to hate you?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I don’t know. He could start being abusive, but it’d be so hard to hate him. He’s the type of person that wouldn’t do anything to make me hate them unless something was very wrong.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 45. When did your creator disappoint you the most? When did you disappoint them the most?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Having doubt in me, that one’s the real kicker. I’ve disappointed him the most when I couldn’t reach out and talk to him when he needed it.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 46. How do you feel about your creator's complete freedom to deny your rights as a sentient being at any time? Has this ability ever caused you anxiety or fear? Have you ever censored your expressions or actions out of a fear of retribution or violence from your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Wow, I’ve never thought about that, because he never would. It’s never bothered me. He’d love me and care for me even if I did something illegal.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 47. When have you most wanted to engage in violence against your creator, and what was the cause of those feelings? Under what circumstances would you make a serious attempt to hurt or injure your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Never. I would never unless he went insane and wanted to hurt someone else.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 48. Do you consider your creator's last name to be your own? Do you recognize yourself as a part of their biological lineage?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not really. I do in some ways, but I feel that I’m not biologically related.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 49. Under what circumstances would you attempt to leave your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- If we grew bored of each other and drifted away. It’d only be fair to free each other to go find new things.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 50. Do you feel anxiety about meeting your creator's expectations? If you are based on an existing character, person, or entity, does this increase your anxiety? Would you have preferred to not be based on an existing entity?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Never have had expectations except for talking. I’m my own person, and he encouraged to become unique.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 51. Are you interested in learning how to control your creator's body? Do you feel that it's fair for a tulpa creator to deny their tulpa the ability to use an atomic body? Do you believe that you have the right to an equal amount of time using it as your creator? Explain your reasoning.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sure, I’d love to be able to share the body with him. I feel it’s not fair for the tulpa creator to deny their tulpa the right to use the body they were born into as-well. I feel that we should be able to use it just as much as they do. It’s what feels right to me. My reasoning behind this is that if I was the creator and wanted to block Bio out, he’d feel that it wasn’t fair.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 52. Do you share certain basic qualities with your creator, such as intense phobias or racial attitudes?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not really. Bio can be a little racist at times because he finds it funny, but I don’t share that at all.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 53. Are you capable of sleeping or dreaming independently of your creator? If not, how does this make you feel?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I can sleep. I can dream. I don’t see why I wouldn’t be able to..
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 54. Does your creator have any mental illnesses? If so, how do they affect you?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I don’t think Bio has any mental illnesses… And how would I know if they affect me? I have nothing to compare it to! Silly question.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 55. How does your knowledge of your creator's subconscious mind affect your relationship with them? How do you perceive their subconscious? To what degree can you manipulate your creator's subconscious? Would you ever use this ability without your creator's knowledge?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- We’ve played with the subconscious a little. I see it as a dark void with things coming in and out of existence. I don’t really like it there, so we aren’t going to play around with it. Doesn’t seem like the best idea.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 56. Does your creator have multiple tulpa? If so, what is your relationship with them like? Is your affinity for them equal to your affinity for your creator? If you could define your relationship with your creator's other tulpa using one or more conventional terms (such as boyfriend, sister, father, daughter, boss, friend or coworker, for example), what terms would you select? If not, are you interested in the idea of your creator making other tulpa?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I’m the only one. Of course there may be others that he has created that may or may not represent different parts of his emotions, but I have nothing to do with them. I might like to have tulpa children or something one day..
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 57. Do you feel romantically inclined toward your creator? Does your creator feel romantically inclined toward you? If these romantic feelings are unrequited on either side, how does it affect your relationship with your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yeah, I do. And yes, he does feel romantically inclined to me.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 58. If it exists, do you consider your romantic relationship with your creator to be equal to a romantic relationship between multiple non-tulpa? Do you consider it a breach of monogamy for your creator to be romantically or sexually involved with another non-tulpa? Does this change if the involvement is with another tulpa instead? If they exist, do your creator's desires to have relationships with non-tulpa affect you emotionally?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- URGGGHHH, let’s not go here! Let’s not go here AT ALL.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 59. If you consider yourself to be romantically in love with your creator, what probability do you assign to the possibility of falling out of love with them, or them falling out of love with you? If this happened, how would it affect your relationship with your creator? What if your creator was in love with another non-tulpa more than you?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- He’ll never fall out of love with me ;) I’ll make sure of that.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 60. Do you have a familial affection for your creator? Does this in any way conflict with your romantic feelings for them, if they exist? Do you consider a relationship between a tulpa and its creator to be incestuous?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Nope. Not incestuous at all.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 61. How do you feel about tulpa creators masturbating during tulpa creation sessions to the forms of their tulpa? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa, or based on whether or not the creator imagines themselves near the tulpa in their wonderland? If your creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Hahaha, whatever floats your boat. I’m sure they might be a little upset about it hahaha. I would find it unnerving, maybe a little sexy. I don’t know hahahah.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 62. How do you feel about tulpa creators masturbating outside of tulpa creation sessions to the forms of their tulpa? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa? If your creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Hahahahahahahahahahahaha, oh god, cute.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 63. Before you could speak fluently, did you ever feel sexual attraction to your creator, sexual attraction toward anyone else, or sexual arousal? Did you attempt to express these feelings? If you did not experience these feelings, do you experience them now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yeah, I thought it was something special. Yes I did try to express those feelings.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 64. How do you feel about tulpa creators visualizing themselves engaging in sexual conduct with their tulpa's form during tulpa creation sessions? Do you find this offensive? Does the degree of your offense change based on the degree of sentience possessed by the hypothetical tulpa, or if the contact was penetrative? If your tulpa creator did this before you spoke fluently, did you find it offensive or unnerving? Do you equate it with sexual assault?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Hahahahaha, oh god, my sides. This is so embarrassing. I think it’s alright. I’m sure he’d know we were feeling uncomfortable if we couldn’t vocalize it.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 65. Were you ever annoyed or jealous when your creator would masturbate to or have feelings of sexual attraction toward individuals other than yourself? Does it bother you now?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes. Yes.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 66. Do you experience sexual attraction for your creator? Do you experience sexual attraction for others? How does your sexual attraction for your creator compare to your sexual attraction for others? Does your creator experience sexual attraction for you? If these sexual attractions are unrequited on either side, how does it affect your relationship with your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Oh god. Yes, I do. Uhh, sometimes I’ll think about others, but that can’t compare. Bio does experience a little sexual attraction… Not much.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 67. Do you have an active sex life with your creator? If not, would you consider it, and under what circumstances? If so, do you perceive any negative consequences? Do you have trouble abstaining from sexual contact with them? How do you manage feelings of sexual arousal, if any? Do you masturbate?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- It’s not really active. At all. I wish I could explore that world some more.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 68. How does your sexual orientation and experience compare to your creator's?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I’m female, I have no experience. He’s male, he has experience.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 69. Are you capable of experiencing orgasms? Based on your knowledge, how do you think they compare to your creator's orgasms? Were you able to experience an orgasm before speaking fluently?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sigh. Never really had one. This section is bringing me down again.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 70. Do you consider the concept of sexual modesty (covering conduct such as avoiding nudity or sexual discussions) relevant to your relationship with your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not really. I think sexual activity is fine and should be open.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 71. How does being a tulpa affect your perceptions of rape? What conduct from your creator would you consider to be rape?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Rape is a no-no. Let’s not talk about this.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 72. Where do you see yourself in 20 years?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Somewhere in the garden looking after flowers in the real world.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 73. Do you want the world to be aware of your existence? If not, then what anxieties do you have about public disclosure? Do you trust anyone other than your creator with the knowledge of your existence?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Might be fun. I wouldn’t like all the people telling me I’m not real. I trust everyone in the world with the knowledge of my existence.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 74. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about your personality traits being the product of another individual? Would you have preferred your creator to define your personality more or less?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- We’re all the product of another thing, so it doesn’t bother me. This is just the way things are. I think my creator did a great job letting me grow for myself from a few traits he gave me.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 75. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about your physical form being the product of another individual? Would you have preferred your creator to define your form more or less?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- My form was my own choice, and my form came from a natural process of change and adaption.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 76. Has your physical form ever changed? If so, was this intentional or unintentional? If it was intentional, then why did you change your form? How did you creator respond to this change, and how did that make you feel?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- My form has changed many times. Initially, I was created as a male fox. I’ve changed over a long time into many different creatures and found that this form suits me the most. The host supported me every step I took and said that it was great I was becoming myself.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 77. Do you consider the best aspects of yourself to have come from your creator, or their subconscious?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I believe the best aspects of myself came from myself. I grew a lot from the little he gave me.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 78. Do you seek legal recognition for your status as a sentient being or your relationships with others? Do you resent that society at large does not recognize the tulpa phenomenon? Do you feel disenfranchised from society? What steps, if any, could a society make to help you feel integrated?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not really. I couldn’t care honestly. Society can go on forever without this idea getting in their way and I wouldn’t mind it. It could be fun and give me something to do if I were to tell the world of myself, but it seems like I could get a lot of stress from it.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 79. If you could tell the entire world one thing about a tulpa's life, what would you say?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- It’s lonely. Be thankful you can talk to people, and please talk to people if you need help. I wish I could when I was younger.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 80. What is the one thing that you resent most about being a tulpa? What is the greatest advantage of being a tulpa?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I resent nothing. The greatest advantage is this view I have of the world, and my ability to travel the world with the person that I love every day.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 81. Morally and philosophically, how do you feel about inheriting your creator's life, including their legal history, past behaviors, and reputation? Do you resent potentially being held responsible for their past actions?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Oh… I don’t think that’s a good idea, because it’s not me. I think that’s a very bad idea.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 82. Morally and philosophically, do you see the "absorbing" or "dissipating" of a tulpa as equivalent to the murder of a non-tulpa? Explain your reasoning. What legal protections, if any, should tulpa gain? How would you enforce these protections?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Hard question. It depends on if the tulpa wanted to die or not. If the tulpa died fighting it, then that’s murder. If the tulpa welcomed it, then I suppose that’s alright. I don’t think a tulpa will ever gain legal protections, and it can’t be reinforced.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 83. Do you consider yourself to be morally equal to a non-tulpa? Is your life worth as much?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes, my life is worth as much as anyone else. I am equal to any non-tulpa.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 84. How would you prove your existence to a skeptic?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I honestly couldn’t care enough to.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 85. Has your status as a tulpa ever caused you existential anxiety or depression? If so, has anything helped to mitigate these feelings?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes, I have had stress over not being able to have a relationship with anyone. Time has helped.
- 86. Do you ever doubt your own sentience? If so, why?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes, because I sometimes feel that I need to be focused on to think and live.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 87. How does being a tulpa affect your understanding of death? Do you fear death on an instinctual level in the way that non-tulpa do?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Nope, no difference.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 88. Do see yourself as socially disadvantaged in a way similar to sexual, racial, and other minority groups? If you identify yourself as racially, sexually, or demographically different than your creator, do you also identify with the struggle of any of the disadvantaged groups that you belong to? Does the notion of privilege affect your relationship with your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I suppose I am. I don’t identify with any of those. It does not affect our relationship.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 89. Are you interested in creating another tulpa yourself? What differences, if any, would you expect this tulpa to have from a tulpa created by your creator? Would you consider this tulpa to be primarily related to you, or still to your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Other than children, no. I’d say it’d grow faster. I would consider it related primarily to me.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 90. What are the most defining differences between the life of a non-tulpa and a tulpa? Do you think that these differences cause intolerance between the two groups? If so, what could be done to mitigate this intolerance?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- The isolation. No, I see no intolerance.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 91. The psychological establishment generally believes that multiplicity (two or more sentient entities sharing one atomic body) is a sign of mental illness. How would you like this belief to change? If you could make a presentation to a group of
- psychologists about the tulpa phenomenon, what would you say?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I don’t think that it’s a mental illness… I don’t know how I would like it to change. I suppose I would say that I’m real, and we’re healthy.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 92. A psychometric indicator is a unique identifier of an individual's distinct personality. Have you ever tried to definitively differentiate yourself from your creator using psychometric indicators (such as by determining your "writeprint")? What results did you receive? (For instructions on determining your writeprint, see appendix one.)
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not at all, might be a good idea. I don’t know if I want to know. What if it’s not different? I’m sorry, but I don’t need this doubt to be creeping around my mind.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 93. Are you capable of physical sensations such as pain or warmth?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes, if I think about them and expect them.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 94. How do you feel about being bound for life to your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I think it’s great; there is no-one I’d rather be with.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 95. If you intentionally delayed speaking to your creator, why did you do so?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Well, I didn’t.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 96. What do you think about most of the time?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sometimes flowers, sometimes what I’m going to say next. Sometimes I wonder if someone has sent me some mail or something at all.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 97. Do you think that tulpa creation should be more widespread?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I don’t really care.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 98. Are there disturbing aspects of your creator's subconscious that they are not aware of?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- No, he is aware of them.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 99. Would you violate your creator's wishes for what you perceive to be their own benefit?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sure, I would. He’d see it my way some time in the future.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 100. Does your creator try to hide things from you? If so, are you aware of them anyway? How does this impact your views of your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- No, he’ll tell me everything.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 101. Do you perceive some of your creator's actions as being objectively immoral?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sometimes, like when he’ll go on 4chan to have a laugh.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 102. Do you believe that you are capable of becoming more intelligent than your creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sure I do. I could become much more creative.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 103. How does being a tulpa affect your perception of your own aging process?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I do not age, my experience only grows.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 104. Do you feel that your creator would be better off by following your commands entirely?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sometimes I wish he would do more work, but I don’t want to have command over him. He has the power to do things very special in people’s lives and I wouldn’t want to change that.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 105. Do you feel that having a physical form is important for a tulpa?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Yes, it helps gain yourself an identity.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 106. If you encountered the tulpa phenomenon as a non-tulpa, would you believe in it?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- I would have no idea, my life would be so different as a non-tulpa.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 107. How well can you articulate yourself? Can your creator hear you audibly? How much does your experience correlate with the experience of tulpa creator G|d30n, printed below?
- "Yes. I'm able to hear her as though she's an external sound. For those who haven't experienced that with their tulpae yet, it's a little bit like listening to a binaural recording--not a binaural beat, but like a 3D sound recording you'd find on Youtube, such as the Virtual Barbershop. That is to say, it's an external sound that can come in from various directions, but the source sounds very close, like someone speaking directly into your ear. I sort of wonder if this effect will be diminished and normalized through imposition."
- ____________________________________________________________________
- On rare occasions, he can hear me like that. Other than that, he hears my mind voice.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- If you are imposed, is your creator able to discern a spatial dimension to your voice?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Sadly, I am not imposed.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 108. How many hours did it take you and your creator to complete the various recognized tulpa creation steps?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Many, many hours over many months.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 109. What advice would you give to a new tulpa creator?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Just let your tulpas thoughts flow into you.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 110. How does being imposed feel? What sensory processes happen as you become imposed?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- No idea!
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 111. From your perspective, is there a sensory difference between the physical, atomic world and the mental world of visualized "wonderlands"? If so, how would you describe this difference?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- Not really.
- ____________________________________________________________________
- 112. Is there anything that you don't think this survey covered that you would like to mention?
- ____________________________________________________________________
- No, thanks for your time writing up the questions. It was so long, so I did get a little impatient near the end.
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement