J.D.

Java Shit
"WARNING!!! JavaShit is switched on in your browser!!! Switch it off immediately and never switch it on again!!! Do you really want to continue?!!!"

Leave page -> "You fool! How do you know I will do what you want?!" / "JavaShit is SHIT!"

"Why do I hate JavaShit?

There used to be the days when using the world wide web was pleasant. Those days are over now. JavaShit arrived and it is infecting more and more pages all over the world. So should I just turn JavaShit support on in my browser? I have my reasons to say no.
JavaShit crushes my browser. Yes, it is the latest version of Netscape Communicator (from the inventor of JavaShit) for my platform (Linux for Alpha processors). It does not happen with all pages with JavaShit contents, but it is annoying enough when it happens on some of them (e.g. www.aclweb.org).
I want control over my browser. I don't want windows popping up all over my screen faster than I can close them. I do want to have means to close them (without the title bar, that can be sometimes difficult).
In those good old times, when I wanted to check data on some commercial product, I could use Google to find the data sheet page. Unfortunately, when braindead webmasters took over web pages and contaminated then with JavaShit, such pages are no longer indexed by web search engines. Why have those emptyheaded webmasters not been fired for that is a great mystery.
It happens to me when I travel, that I have access only to pure text terminals. Those kids that have seen nothing but Windows in their lives cannot possibly imagine that, but it is possible (at least it used to be) to browse the internet on such terminals. People just use lynx for that. I do that also on a graphical display terminal when I want to save time and space. No graphics is needed to access e.g. railway timetable. At least I don't need any graphics for that; webmasters apparently do. They use JavaShit to "enhance" it.
I want security, especially e.g. when I access my bank account, but bank webmasters prefer JavaShit.
The use of JavaShit is never necessary.
Web pages should be prepared in such a way, that they could be displayed on any browser. If the page has something valuable to offer that requires some special software, it should not influence parts that have nothing to do with it. If you make a menu in form of a picture, you should also provide a textual equivalent somewhere. There is no reason to make menus in JavaShit.
JavaShit is not portable. It is interpreted in various ways by various browsers. While testing this page, I got various results with various browsers. Some emptyheaded web admins are aware of the fact, so they... require the users to use only "blessed" browsers, ie. M$ IE, and sometimes Netscape with sufficiently high version number (and of course only with JavaShit switched on). Normal users are told to go away or download the latest M$ IE. There is no M$ IE for any platform I use. If there were one, I would not use it anyway.
JavaShit lovers spread lies about their beloved language.
They say JavaShit programs can check the data in forms so that it is safe. I can save their pages, modify their programs, and compromise their security. This lie is dangerous because people tend to think that they can forget about perl scripts on the server side. Recently, phishing attacks based on scripts became popular.
They say that people love when they loose control over their screen. If someone wants a window in a particular size, most window managers (even Windows!) let the user change that size freely. If someone wants to see another page in another window (as opposed to the same window), using the middle mouse button (or something more elaborate on Windows) should do the trick. It is quite annoying to see new windows open when we don't want that.
They say that all you have to do is to download the newest version of some Microsoft product or Netscape. They even have a campaign (sic!) to make all web pages inaccessible to anyone but Microsoft slaves (in a doublespeak, they call it enforcing web standards!!!). Fortunately, there is another campaign to make web pages usable to anyone. I don't want to be forced to use any Microsoft software, and I do use the latest from Netscape on my platform. It does not solve problems with JavaShit. In addition, the newer software you use the more problems you have. All software producers follow the example of Microsoft, and they let the users do the testing. The newest so called stable version of one browser I tried recently (for the Intel platform) crashed or hanged so frequently, that I find it simply unusable.
JavaShit is officially called JavaScript.

Can there be anything worse than JavaShit?

Yes, there can. The answer is Necromedia Flush the Toilet. Why?
While with JavaShit, you can at least analyze the code to follow links, with Necromedia Flush, you only get a message to download the absolutely newest version of the toilet.
At least with konqueror, you can switch JavaShit off for individual pages. With Necromedia Flush, you have to deinstall it.
The toilet frequently ignores switching off playing and looping the animations from its own menu. Moreover, it is possible to modify the menu so that the options of switching off the play and looping do not appear on it.
Human-Computer Interaction studies show that people are annoyed by animated banners, and that animation is a clear indication where not to look, and that people try not to look at all at the area where it happens. This is probably the reason why empty-headed web admins love the toilet."