Grand Unified Game Instructions for Survival Round and Knock-outs
Read this like a flow-chart. Each section is independent of the others.
Remember to believe in the heart of the tactics. Grandad's formation has no bad players.

Pregame:
Sub by condition, but if conditions are tied:
1. Give preference to T4 Peasant (GK) - Monacar kinda blew it in the Round of Sneed.
2. Give preference to Villagers Aren't People (RB) - NPC Ojii-san's appearance in Spider-Verse has definitely powered him up.
3. Give preference to Toot Me Bros (CB) - Toot abuse is basically a better form of chant abuse.
4. Give preference to Nooooo I Don't Want To Be Water (DMF) - He always brings coffee for everyone, so let the lad play.
5. Put the RB and LB on their respective corners.


At kick-off:
1. Go +1  immediately.

First half:
1. No panicking, let Rackam cook. Stay blue.

Half-time:
1. Activate Centering Targets.
2. If we're tied or losing, activate Gegenpress.

Second half kick-off:
1. If we're winning by 2 or more, go to neutral mentality.
2. Otherwise, let it roll.

Subs at 60 minutes: (Ignore 1 - 3 if this is the Final or 3rd Place match.)
1. If a gold has a yellow card, and we're winning, save a sub for later.
2. If a silver has a yellow card, and we're winning by 2 or more, sub them off. If KMR is getting subbed off this way, bring in Leaky Cookie Vicky, then have her swap with Click Click Click, so that Vicky becomes a CMF and Click Click Click becomes an AMF.
2A. In the unlikely event (now 100% guaranteed since I've jinxed it) that multiple medals have yellow cards, ignore the previous 2 steps and just allow the glorious murderball to continue. Let the bodies hit the pitch.
3. If a non-medal has a yellow card, give them preference to be subbedd out over less dead non-medals. (No score requirements.)
4. Otherwise, do normal non-medal subs based on whoever's most dead.
5. If we are winning, go to neutral mentality (if we aren't already there), and activate Tiki Taka.
6. If we are tied, pray to Bahamut that subs will fix that.
7. If we are losing, pray even harder to Bahamut, and also activate Gegenpress.


75 minutes:
1. If a sub was saved, and we are winning by 2 or more, sub the carded gold off for a DMF. Drag the new DMF down to the height of the other DMF, and drag them both sideways to be lined up above the CB's. Activate Deep Defensive Line.
1. If a sub was saved, and the score line is anything else, do a normal non-medal sub based on whoever's most dead.
2. If we are winning, activate Tiki Taka (if it's not already on), disable Gegenpress (if it's on), go -2, and DOCK THE AIRSHIP.
3. If we're tied, go +1 (if we aren't there already).
4. If we're losing, go +2.

EGGSDRA DIME :DDD intermission part 1
1. Disable Gegenpress and/or Tiki Taka if they're on.
2. Use the 4th sub for the most dead non-medal.

EGGSDRA DIME :DDD part 1 kick-off
1. Go to neutral mentality.
2. Let Rackam cook until the next intermission.

EGGSDRA DIME :DDD intermission part 2
1. STAY BLUE. STAY BLUE. STAAAAY BLUUUUUE!

EGGSDRA DIME :DDD part 2 kick-off:
1. If we're winning, go -2 and DOCK THE AIRSHIP.
2. If we're tied, go +1.
3. If we're losing, +2.


OH FUGG BENULDIES :DDD
1. Do standard order by ability.
2. Flip the coin correctly so we don't get fugged in the benis :DDD


If we get a red card:
1. Move the offender to right behind Burgerboi (or whoever is playing LB) to reflect on his actions.
2. If the offender is an LB, RB, or CB, switch Build-up to Long Pass, switch Positioning to Flexible.
3. If the offender is a CMF, move the other CMF sideways to the middle.
4. If the offender is an AMF, drag a CMF up to be an AMF, and drag the other CMF sideways to the middle.
5. If the offender is a DMF, make no additional changes beyond putting him in the stupid idiot box.
6. If the offender is a CF, and we're winning or tied, switch Build-up to Long Pass, switch Positioning to Flexible, activate Tiki Taka and Deep Defensive Line. Go to neutral mentality.
7. If the offender is a CF, and we're losing, it's JII ENDO. Draw a horse dong with the formation, put the keeper on the corners, and go +2. WITNESS US.


Special Instructions For Defeating the Final Boss if We Go All The Way

Pregame:
1. Ask chat who they want to see on the pitch. Nooooo I Don't Want To Be Water must be on the bench. He's busy making fresh coffee for the team. Ready in 40 Turns has to be on the bench also because she's not ready yet.

Kick-off:
1. Go -2. The team needs time to recover after all that divegrass.

At precisely 22:22:
1. Check those quads.
2. Sub in Nooooo I Don't Want To Be Water.
3. Draw a coffee mug with the formation, with Nooooo on the handle.
4. Activate double Centering Targets and double Gegen. Forgive us, Lucifer-sama, just this once we must bring the full power of the Supreme Primarch and the Boundary to bear.

At precisely 25:25:
1. The team has had time to drink their coffee. Go +2.

Half-time:
1. 40 turns have now passed. Sub in Ready in 40 Turns.

At 69:00:
1. N I C E.
2. Ask chat who they want for the last sub.