Twilight of the Abyss, Session 7

<DM> *The two of you, Hal and Kirran, are currently enduring a staredown with Queen Midna, the princess of stubborn stuckupness and tragic backstories.
<Kirran> (I believe when we last left off, I had successfully pulled off the ultimate butler move.)
<Hal> (I was with Kirran also)
<DM> (you did, but you eventually came back to the Council Room, along with Xanas.)
<Hal> (Ah)
<DM> (thanks to you not being a Dex, you helped to diplomacy a deal)
<DM> *As for your allies, Dex is asleep on the floor, his body/corpse/etc. following you in a creepy one foot at a time manner, and Darte's corpse seems to fit very nicely in a jar. It spookily floats around the 4th wall.
<DM> *And good ol' Gerudo buddy ol' pal ol' Corsava has disappeared. Lovely.
<DM> [Midna]: ... I see my deal may have been too much for your comrades.
<DM> [Midna]: In addition to you collecting the other Twilight Mirror Fragment, I require something else.
* Hal listens intently.
<DM> *She draws a pattern in the air in front of her. Then, a mask, or.... half a mask, with an oddly familiar yet foreign design appears over the right half of her face.
<DM> [Midna]: This is the Fused Shadow, a mask that is my birthright. Or... half a mask.
<DM> *She seems to grimace at the thought, then recomposes herself.
<DM> [Midna]: The other half was stolen by a Twili betrayer named Zant. Either retrieve the other half of this mask, or drag Zant back here. Do either, and I'll consider you all allies to be completely trusted.
<DM> [Midna]: I may even try to do something for your... world.
* Kirran bows.
<Kirran> To the best of our abilities, we'll do what we can.
* Hal follows Kirran in bowing.
<DM> *She halfway bows back, then turns her back and heads towards the other side of the room. Without turning, she speaks back.
<DM> [Midna]: Rest, for now. Xanas will inform you when there's Interloper movement in the fields. Coordinate with him on where to go next, but until then, feel free to roam the palace. Anywhere except the Mirror Room.
<DM> *Without a chance to respond, she heads through the door on the opposite side, with it locking behind her. Also, right when opens and closes the door, you swear you hear some sort of whimpering sound, but you have no idea what caused it.
<Kirran> 0_0
* Kirran keeps that particular observation to himself for now.
<Hal> We should get going. We need to prepare ourselves for the next task coming.
<DM> [Xanas]: If you'll excuse me, I'll be in the armory. I'd recommend hitting up Zuph's shop, you two could use some of our equipment. Or if you can get ahold of Medlora, she's currently deep into researching... something, in the library. If I recall... she was acquainted with Zant before the Great Destruction, though she doesn't speak of it....
<Kirran> I'm going to go talk with Medlora after I find something to eat.
* Hal looks back and shrugs at Dex sleepwalking behind the two of us
<DM> *He looks at you, baffled.
<DM> [Xanas]: ... eat?
* Kirran suddenly realizes that Twili don't have mouths.
<Kirran> Uhhh...
* Hal looks into his bag and pulled out a jar containing a ration of... pickled Cactuar chunks?
<Kirran> That would probably take more explaining than it's worth
<DM> *They have mouths..... but....... come to think of it, you guys haven't seen them eat since you got here. You're not sure whether it's just inconvenient timing, laziness on the DM's part, a lack of worldbuilding, or some other mysterious cause.
<DM> *He inspects the jar, his glossy yellow eyes curving multiple ways, then recoiling himself a bit.
* Kirran eats a cake and gives some to Raine
<DM> [Xanas]: I'm afraid your... what you eat is.... not appealing, to us. You may have to... scrounge, for your food... stuffs.
<DM> *She happily gobbles the cake down.
* Kirran shrugs. We usually do.
<DM> [Raine]: Ahh, that feels better, not dealing with creepy mask man!
<DM> *He looks even more perplexed at the sight of Raine's cake cannibalism.
<Kirran> Speaking of, Xanas, do you know anything about a light worlder with a peculiar and creepy obsession involving masks?
<DM> [Xanas]: Can't say I do. You're the first lightworlders to appear here in 20 years, not since the warriors of light themselves.
<DM> [Xanas]: Is there... another one here, in the Twilight Realm?
* Kirran explains about the guy they ran into.
<DM> *EXPOSITION NO JUTSU!*
<Kirran> He's a force to be reckoned with too. Took a boulder to the face and didn't even flinch.
* Hal fishes out a couple of chunks and munches on them. Very bitter and leaving a spiky aftertaste in his mouth. Used to unusual foods over in Koholint, he had little issue handling pickled cactuar.
<DM> *Several minutes of nods of understanding later...
<DM> *Hal, as you recoil a bit from the taste, you happen to catch a guard eating... something. You rub your eyes, thinking you had to have just hallucinated, but then... it happens again.
<DM> *The Twili are eating shadows. Actual 2D shadows. And they're enjoying it.
<DM> [Xanas]: Hmm, we'll have to be on the lookout for him. Though, from what you told me... he's not aligned with the Interlopers.
* Hal nodded slowly in disbelief, learning just another thing.
<DM> [Xanas]: Perhaps, if he shows up again, we can use it to our advantage and get him to fight the Interlopers for us...
<Kirran> No, I don't think so. He seems to be invested in whatever causes the most chaos and body count.
<DM> [Xanas]: I.. see. Nonetheless, it's something to consider. If you'll excuse me, I'll be in the armory. Come back when you've rested up and talked to who you need to talk to.
<DM> *He bows to the two of you, then heads on his way out.
* Hal screwed the top of his jar back on and placed the chunks back in his bag.
<DM> *You can't help but wonder if, Hal, if there's another dimension to your food. A hidden dimension.
* Hal looked over to Kirran and wispered "I wonder if they know anything about the Scimitar of Twilight and how it has been stolen from the Twilight Realm"
* Kirran shrugs.
<Kirran> I don't even know what that is, but I'm sure Medlora does. Just a matter of figuring out how to ask without her hitting us with books.
* Hal nodded "Medlora then"
<Kirran> Might as well meet this Zuph guy everyone's talking about too, while we're at it.
<DM> *So, Zuph or Medlora first?
<Kirran> Medlora. I don't really need to buy anything except to restock on the potions we chugged through.
<Hal> Same
<DM> *Alrighty, Medlora it tis.
<DM> *The two of you head to the library, complete with floating Darte jar hanging up and chilling with the Sols near the ceiling, and dead-Dex swimming through the floor. The sight turns some guards' heads on the way, but nothing too out of the ordinary.
<Kirran> It's nice not to have to stealth the halls again. Still want to know what was up with that anti-grav room though. Heck of a trap
<DM> you should try asking about that sometime
<DM> *You reach the library, where you find, just like last time, no Sols in here, just floating spectral flames (similar to those found in the Old Shadow Temple), and... a pile of books in the middle of the floor? Medlora is nowhere to be seen, though... you do hear something groaning from the direction of the pile.
<DM> *Also, upon entering, the doors seem to automatically close behind you. Not locking, just... closing.
* Kirran stealth and observe mode, activate.
* Hal also goes into stealth and observe mode
<DM> *You start to sneak around, when part of the way through your sneaking... a book catches your foot. Same with you, Hal. It doesn't trip either of you.
<DM> *You hear a disgruntled voice from the pile...
<DM> [Medlora]: Somewuuuuuuun's in my liiiiiiibraaaaaaryyyyyy.... I can hear 'em..... I can...... smell 'em......
<Kirran> Hi Medlora.
<DM> [Medlora]: Aughlewarghle MREFREMBERG!
* Kirran tries to shake the book off his foot like it's a papillon
<DM> *The pile of books flies outwards in every direction, then reconvenes in a telekinetic swirl around Medlora, who slumps herself onto a book and starts floating lazily through the air.
<DM> *The book growls at you, taps your foot angrily, then shuffles back to join the rest of the flock.
<Hal> O.o
<DM> *No, not really, but that's how Raine interpreted it.
<DM> [Raine]: Get outta mah swamp, you stupid book!
<DM> [Raine]: That's MY blood-coated cherry cheesecake! You darned book!
<Kirran> Raine, stop fighting with the book. It's less sentient then you.
<DM> *Medlora finally looks up and around, then looks at the two of you. Which is odd, cause you swear you're stealthed. Well, it makes sense for Kirran since he's talking, but Hal, you swear she stares a solid few seconds in your direction, then back towards the hubbable of Kirran and Raine.
<DM> [Raine]: Wha? But... books are to be consumed with knowledge, contained within them the very soul and essence of logic itself! To overcome one would be to douse yourself in fluffy wizzrobes- OH MY GOD I WANT A FLUFFY WIZZROBE AS A PET NOW!
<DM> *She goes back into her bottle, smiling comfortably at the thought of having a pet fluffy wizzrobe.
<DM> [Medlora]: A fluffy whatrobe?
* Hal shrugs, shuddering at the thought of a Haddaken Wizzrobe 0.0
* Kirran shudders remembering what the DM did to my whisp pet.
<DM> *She hovers through the air, then ends up in front of you, Kirran, seeming to inspect you... no... Raine, closely.
<Kirran> Medlora, I really don't advise you get that close. Raine is kinda touchy about that kinda thing.
<DM> [Medlora]: Curious little creature. Looks like one of those Twilight Fairies. Well, what's left of them, anywho...
<Kirran> Twilight what now?
<DM> *Raine is preoccupied with her daydreams.
<DM> [Medlora]: You know, a... there used to be a Fairy Fountain in the old palace. Got blown to pieces with the Great Destruction though...
<DM> [Medlora]: Midna bud's keepin' the last of them, what few that remain, alive. Not that she shows anyone, except good ol' me, teeheehee!
<Kirran> Why did the fountain get destroyed?
<DM> [Medlora]: Why? Hah, go ask the explosion that tried to blow up the whole Twilight Realm! Big meanie! Whoever caused that explosion should pay!
<DM> *She punches her fists together, and in suite, some of her books punch together. Also, now that you are familiar with Magnetic Gloves, you realize she's wearing a pair of them as well.
<DM> [Medlora]: Le-siiiiigh. So, what brings you two to mah swamp- I mean library?
* Hal undoes his invisbility as well with Dex' sudden reawakening.
<Kirran> Well, I was wondering if we could exchange some lore between our worlds.
<DM> [Medlora]: Err, three, didn't know the lizard thingy was alive.... yeesh.
<DM> *Dex's body stops auto-swimming through the floor and reorients itself.
<Kirran> I'm curious to know why you have a symbol so like my clans, and I'm sure there's much you'd like to know about our land.
<Dex> I'm really hard to perma kill.
<DM> [Medlora]: Exchange some lore? Why, we could even create a link between our worlds!
* DM ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuns.
* Kirran resists the urge to facepalm
* Hal looked at Dex "Did you have had enough of breaking logic today?"
<DM> *She looks from side to side, as if juggling a bunch of different thoughts in her head, some of the books juggling along as well.
<DM> [Medlora]: Hmm, we have a symbol like your clans? Uhh, if I may ask... how olds yer clans?
<Dex> Did I break it recently?
<DM> *The fourth wall tries not to groan in agony from your apparent breakage, Dex.
<Hal> Judging by how you just swam through the floor in your sleep, yes.
<DM> *She suddenly gets distracted at the sight of Dex, then tries to avoid snorting a laugh.
<Kirran> I don't really know. Some say as old as Hyrule itself, but it's difficult to verify. I know there are common linkages between us and the desert folk, the Gerudo.
<DM> *She turns back to you, Kirran.
<Kirran> But it gets murkier the further back in time one tries to trace it.
<DM> [Medlora]: Welllll, if these books are any sign, hmm.....
<Dex> Sup?
<Dex> Why are we in a library?
<DM> *She pulls up a series of books in front of her, seeming to flip through them at a rapid pace, then pausing finally.
<DM> [Medlora]: This high rule land you come from ain't that old. I mean, yeah it's older than yer mom, but this place has been around waaaaaay longer.
<Dex> I've seen older.
<DM> [Medlora]: There's some references that our land and your land were once connected, so maybe.... some parts of our stuff fell out? Sounds like you and your clans folk have just been using our stuff and calling it yours.
<DM> [Medlora]: Woah-hohoh, I'm sure ye have, statue- *snort* ...... statue guy!
<Dex> Statues don't age so yeah.
<DM> *She stares at you, the corners of her mouth curling as she tries not to bust out laughing.
* Dex flexes stiffly.
<Kirran> Speaking of things that are yours, what can you tell me about your deity?
<Kirran> Aside from the fact that he is both fierce and maybe doesn't like us light worlders all that much.
<DM> *She seems to recoil a tad uncomfortably, then pipes up in avid joy.
<Kirran> Or, really, at all.
<Dex> Maybe the fierce means "really pretty"?
<DM> [Medlora]: Whaaa? Why would he hate you folks? I m-mean, he's uhh... umm... he's strong, and benevonebeovolent, he uhh... he gave us Twili the t-technology of the l-a-a-and, he uhh... he saved us from the Great Destruction! Hah, yeah! If it weren't for good ol' buddy' ol' Fierce Deity, we all would be dead right now!
<DM> [Medlora]: Ahahah! Yeah, what lizard said!
<Dex> Like, you know, YAAAAS QUEEN YOU ARE A FEIRCE DEITY.
<DM> . . .
* Hal resists the urge to facepalm at Dex' comment
* DM goes into his storage room, where he keeps his old dusty 80 cal sniper rifle. Ah yes, a bit aged and antiquated, but still very much working...
<DM> [Medlora]: Well, anything in particular 'bout Great Deity?
<Kirran> Does he have enemies other than the interlopers?
* Dex tries to steal the rifle from the DM.
<DM> [Medlora]: Huh? Wait he... hang on, you guys got the wrong idea.
* Hal polishes his boot over Dex trying to steal the rifle
<DM> *Dex, you attempt to merge into the fourth wall once more to steal the sniper rifle. You..... successfully steal it! Well, an illusion of one anywho. It disappears in your hand quickly.
<DM> *She flips through some more pages.
<Dex> Hmmm.
<Dex> You guys wanna see something neat?
* Orithan has kicked Dex from #zurpg (You were kicked out of the window and landed in the courtroom as a witness!)
* Orithan kicks Dex out of the window
<DM> [Medlora]: We Twili and Interlopers may hate each other, but... Fierce Deity is our god. He's the god of this realm, the god to all who walk in this realm.
* Dex turns the staff into an illusion of the sniper rifle.
<DM> [Medlora]: If anything, his enemies are those that would try to hurt or destroy the Twilight Realm.
<DM> [Medlora]: So....
<DM> *She points at you all.
<DM> [Medlora]: You're his enemies.
* Kirran fights the urge to backstab Dex with the illusion of a butterfly knife
<DM> *She suddenly flusters.
<Dex> I've killed gods before. I'm not worried.
<DM> [Medlora]: Err, I mean, not you all personally, just, well... err... you know what I mean!
<Dex> Remember that shadow king dude guy.
<Dex> Good times.
<Dex> I was undead.
<DM> [Medlora]: Shadow king...? Like... Zant?
<Dex> Naw some Gerudo guy.
<Kirran> I think Dex is referring to a former kind of the Gerudo, Garonoff.
<DM> [Medlora]: What's a Ger rude guy?
* Kirran explains the desert folk.
<DM> *Que Darude S- no..... GERUDE SANDSTORM!*
* Dex aims at Kirran and pulls the trigger. "Snipin's a good job mate."
<Kirran> You already met one of them, our currently absent friend Corsava
<DM> *Ca-cause...... they're..... in a d-desert. Right? EYYYYY*
<DM> [Medlora]: Oh-hoh, yeah, one of those strong, hot chicks, yeah, got it! I mean, except male, and dude-like and probably not hot and- oh freaigfrjoegurtmdisgbotmerb
<DM> *She hides her face behind one of her books.
<DM> [Medlora]: ... aaaanything else you folks want to uhhh... ask?
* Hal looks over to Medlora.
<DM> *She pulls the book to the side, then points to Dex.
<DM> *Dex, you pull the trigger, and...... nothing happens. Though, for the rest of this session...... you're now Australian.
<Dex> Right mate.
<DM> *Your voice is full Aussie, like TF2 Sniper.
<Dex> Wotcha guv.
<Dex> Crikey.
<DM> [Medlora]: Ahoy, statue guy, I'm still researchin' that slaver sword, haven't quite found another clue. Yet.
<DM> [Medlora]: Err... slaver sword isn't right, uhh... what's that thing called, the slaver..... what's another word for slaver....
<Dex> Ace! You take all arvo if you gotta.
<DM> [Medlora]: Ace Sword! Yeah, with its Ace Combat..... ........ no that doesn't sound right either....
* Hal asks "I recall a mention of a strange scimitar with what appeared to be Twili circuity being wielded by a lightworlder. A Lightworld bandit king named Thoughter. Do you have any idea of what this scimitar is?"
<Kirran> (We just need Baegba in here for everything to be completely unintelligble.)
<DM> *She flips through a bunch of books frantically, then produces one. For a moment, you see the text on the page. Weird, you folks can speak and understand Twili now, yet...... you have no idea what that language was.
<DM> [Medlora]: The why-white where-me-tar?
* Hal reflects back on when he read the report on the attack Thoughter made on the Water Temple, thinking of Ruto's notes on Thoughter.
<Dex> A sword like that oughtta stand out like a dog's balls mates.
<DM> [Medlora]: Oh, Twilight Scimitar, yeah that thing.
<DM> [Medlora]: Uhh... you're proooooobably best not to mention that one to Queen Midna. She uhhh.... you don't wanna go on a fetch quest for that.
<Kirran> I mean, we're already on a fetch quest for the mirror and her mask.
<DM> [Medlora]: All I know is that it got lost during the Great Destruction 20 years ago, and it used to be Midna's fav fav swordy.
<Dex> Well, enough with the earbashin'. Let's go for a squizz and see if we can find it.
<DM> [Medlora]: Oh-hoh, you don't say!
<DM> [Medlora]: Her mask, you say? Why that would mean that...... that...... guy........ has........ .............
* Hal looks over to Dex "The Twilight Scimitar is in the possession of Thougher; in the Light World."
<DM> *She goes silent for a bit. Then, suddenly, she focuses on the page, and blurts out...
<Dex> Yeah for some Banana bender. Don't worry Kirran might be a bit of a root rat but she'll be alright.
<DM> [Medlora]: Master Sword, that's what that darned thing is called! Not Slaver Sword, hahah! Though, that would be funny....
* Kirran 's ears perk up
<Dex> Let's get a move on you bludgers.
<Dex> crocadile dingo wallaby wallaby billabong
<DM> [Medlora]: Yeah, only thing I've found so far is that it's in a land frozen in time. Thought I found something else out, but, well... last time I looked through the Twilight Mirror fragment to check on your world, that really tall tower seemed to be explodied, and preeeeetty sure that Slaver- err Master Swordy ain't there.
<DM> *Where you want to get bludgin' move onto ya billybong?
<Hal> Hmm... tall tower.
<DM> *Tal Tal He- nah, I'm kidding. Only one you can think of is the Stone Tower Temple.
<Hal> That would be the Stone Tower Temple, if I am correct.
<Kirran> (Which isn't in Hyrule at all)
<Hal> I wonder what happened to cause it to explode.
<DM> [Medlora]: The wone wower wemple!
<Dex> Nah mate. First ya get some brekkie then ya head on down to the bottlo for a butcher then pick up some fairy cakes and maybe meet up with some mate whos a right corker of a dag.
<Dex> S'trewth
<DM> [Medlora]: No clue! I'd go ask the lightworlders myself, buuuuuut it's not like I can do anything more than peer down there meself.
<DM> [Medlora]: Anywho, looks like your lizardy friend wants to move on-
<DM> [Raine]: FAIRY WHATCAKES NOW?!
<Dex> Fawkin right ya cunt.
* Hal looked over to Dex. "Try saying that in front of the Salvadman bandits. They will looooove you for it" he piped up in sarcasm.
<DM> *Raine suddenly pops up and waves a finger in front of Dex.
<DM> [Raine]: OH I'LL SHOVE A CAKE RIGHT UP YOUR FAIRY A- oh right, fluffly wizzyrobes!
<Kirran> Medlora, can you send messages through the twilight mirror to the light world?
<Kirran> Like, thought messages maybe.
* Dex sites down the rifle at Raine and pulls the trigger.
<DM> ................
<DM> .................................
* Orithan kicks Dex out of the window
* Orithan has kicked Dex from #zurpg (You were kicked out of the window and landed in Cerulean Cave! Have fun getting lost.)
<DM> *Raine temporarily goes indisposed as she rethinks her existence. I... may bring her back later this session. I'm still debating my own life.
<Dex> Hmm.
* Dex sights Hal with the rifle and pulls the trigger.
<DM> [Medlora]: Uhh... huh, I... I've never tried. Is uhh... anywhere in particular? It's not like the mirror zooms in on a spot real well, I... don't think I can aim at a person.
<DM> *Your rifle attempts to turn him aussie, but it's too late, he was triggered looooong long ago.
<Kirran> Can you aim it at a message stone?
<Dex> Now he's DOUBLE AUSSIE!
<Dex> I dunno. Find me a stone and I can try.
* Hal just ignores Dex and continues listening to Medlora.
<DM> [Medlora]: That's kinda pinpoint, though..... maybe if I attune the Communication Stone to the mirror, I can...... yeah, I think so. Whatcha wanna send?
<Kirran> Can't say for sure, it's kind of a clan thing.
<DM> *Dex, you yourself are kinda stoned in your aussie form. You found a stone, it's you!
<Dex> I'm a gossip stone now too?
<DM> [Medlora]: Well, only way I could try is in the Mirror Room, buuuuuut that's uhh... only me n' Midna can go there.
<Kirran> Yeah, she did kinda tell us not to go in there.
<Dex> All the more reason to go in there.
<DM> [Medlora]: Yeah, nothin' personal, just.... uhh.... yeah, that's her room.
<DM> [Medlora]: I mean, not her bedroom, or anything, but you know... her... uhh... room for her... yeah, you can't go in there. Not unless she reeeeeaaaaaally trusts you.
* Kirran puts on his best butler aura.
<Kirran> We're working on that.
<DM> [Medlora]: I uhh... I see.
<DM> [Medlora]: Welllll I'm sure with a skippity hop and frappity bop you can eventually work your way to her heart! I mean... trust... err.... yeah!
<Dex> I've been told I'm very charming.
<DM> [Medlora]: Not as a statue, you ain't. *snorts*
<Kirran> I thought of something else, if you don't mind us asking about it. What happened to the light spirits that came here? I know they were your enemies (through some very grave misunderstandings, mind you) but they seem to have vanished otherwise.
<Dex> Says you.
<DM> [Medlora]: Light Spirits? Uhh... oh yeah, them! They-
<DM> *She stops suddenly.
<Dex> And who are we sending the docket to?
<Dex> Crikey.
<Hal> And I fear the day Dex and that blarghity luchadore Wolfos meets
<DM> [Medlora]: Well, Faron's in the prison down there. And Ordana's at the Sol Fountain. Umm.... Lanayru, that one's... sorry, don't know.
<Dex> Ah pay no mind to that crow eater. She'll be all right no worries.
<DM> *She doesn't seem to face you when she says that.
<Kirran> Medlora...
<DM> [Medlora]: Whaaaaaaat?
<Dex> Are you comin the raw prawn?
<Kirran> What happened?
<Kirran> What do you know?
<DM> [Medlora]: Uhhhh..... not so much whaaaaat happened so much.... look, I can't tell you about Lanayru! You'll... go ask Midna!
<DM> *She puts her hands in front of her face, pulling up the swirl of books in front of her, masking her entirely.
<DM> [Medlora]: Err, or... go ask Ordana, I don't know! Surely the guards there could use help against the Interlopers anyways.
<Dex> Tell us anyway?
<DM> *One of the swirling books slaps you lightly. Dex, as you're wearing the magnetic gloves, you can't help but notice but feel a very slight pull as the book comes in your vicinity.
<Dex> IS THAT A CUE?
* Dex attracts the books.
<DM> A CUE? OR A CLUE?
<DM> *You.... end up pulling some of the books towards you! You find, as you pull them towards you, there's tiny magnets inserted into the books.
<DM> [Medlora]: He-h-HEY! THOSE ARE MINE, PUT THOSE BACK!
* Kirran has a bad feeling about this.
<Dex> Wait a sec.
<Dex> Magnets in the books?
<DM> *You also end up grabbing the one with the foreign language, that's not Twili and none of you recognize it.
<Dex> My Dex sense is tingling.
<DM> *Well, actually Kirran, you..... think you recognize it. Not that you can read it, but..... you're pretty sure...... that's Ancient Hylian.
* Dex hands the book to Kirran.
<DM> [Medlora]: G-g-gimme my b-books back, y-y-y-you THIEF!
* Kirran pockets it away before anyone knows it's gone.
* Dex looks at Medlora.
<Orithan> (I would have laughed if the books pulled Dex to them instead of the other way around)
<DM> *Kirran, roll Wisdom.
* Dex thinks for a second.
<DM> (good idea, Orithan!)
* Dex pulls himself towards Medlora.
<Kirran> $33d10
<Navi> Kirran: You rolled 33 Dice with 10 Sides. Results: 10, 2, 8, 1, 5, 3, 8, 8, 6, 6, 3, 5, 1, 9, 2, 3, 4, 7, 4, 6, 3, 7, 3, 3, 4, 9, 1, 7, 5, 10, 4, 4 and 1. Total: 162. Successes: 18.
<Dex> HUGS <3
<DM> *Medlora suddenly gets a serious look on her face, then snaps her fingers.
* Kirran rerolls himself because that's just sad.
* Hal just facepalms and walks out of the library
<Kirran> $33d10
<Navi> Kirran: You rolled 33 Dice with 10 Sides. Results: 1, 5, 6, 4, 2, 4, 9, 8, 6, 4, 8, 4, 6, 1, 7, 3, 5, 2, 5, 2, 5, 8, 5, 3, 8, 1, 8, 8, 5, 2, 9, 6 and 6. Total: 166. Successes: 20.
<Kirran> *sigh*
<Kirran> (I miss disco Navi already...)
<DM> *Dex, you end up experiencing a face full of books to the face. By the time you reach where Medlora was, she's... gone. She is now floating herself up towards the higher shelves, now arming herself with more books. Lots of books. ALL THE BOOKS. Except for the one Kirran ninja'd.
<DM> *Kirran, she does not appear to have noticed.
<Dex> I was not expecting this.
* Kirran gets the heck out of there before the book war begins in earnest.
<Dex> YOU USE MAGNETS
<Dex> I THOUGHT IT WAS MAGIC
<Dex> I WAS BETRAYED
<DM> *Dex, although you've got some idea of how magnets work, you're not entirely sure you can control that many books with such incredible precision. Not without more experience.
<DM> [Medlora]: GET OUTTA MAH SWAM- LIBRARY!
<DM> *She starts raining books down like a rain of bullets on you. Let's see, assuming you don't run, Dex, that is a..... oh boy.
<DM> $75d10
<Navi> DM: You rolled 75 Dice with 10 Sides. Total: 415. Successes: 52.
* Dex bolts.
<Dex> after Kirran.
<DM> *You manage to escape out of there before literally getting killed by an excessive intake of knowledge.
<Dex> Well?
<Hal> Shut up.
<DM> *Well, up next on your list of to-visit was... Zuph.
<Dex> What's the book say.
<Dex> I nearly died for you.
<Hal> Let's head to Zuph
<DM> *What are you going to do, Eye of Truth a book?
* Kirran inspects the book, and also the magnet in it.
<DM> *There's a slight magnet slip inserted into the front and back cover. Not sure you can remove it without gutting the book. Seems almost like it was welded in there.
<Kirran> 0_0
<DM> *As for the book, you look through it, seeing images of the Master Sword in all its glory, symbols of both the Sheikah and Twili, symbols of the Triforce, other things...
<DM> *But for the language itself, you can't read it worth crap.
<DM> *To your knowledge, there is someone you know in Kakariko that can read it, some old guy named Sahasrahla- holy crap I actually spelled it right.
<DM> *Though, trying to get it down there might prove to be difficult from up here....
<Hal> Kirran, do you have anything to write on?
<Kirran> Uh...maybe?
<Hal> We don't have to take the book itself with us. But who said we couldn't copy the symbols in it?
* Kirran digs through his Sheikah pockets for any spare receipts or business cards.
<DM> *Other things include other common Hyrulean symbols, and even pictures of both Majora's Mask and Fierce Deity's Mask.
<Hal> *the letters
<DM> *You've got some random paper slips.
<DM> *Mainly debts for failing to pay for all the damages to all the Gossip Stones- err I mean...
<Kirran> (hey, those were legit science experiments and I had permits for that stuff)
<Kirran> >_>
<DM> *You have paper and a pen. Conveniently. Now, whether you can transfer the whole god darn book...... that's another story.
<Hal> (What, blowing up Gossip Stones?)
<DM> (for science)
<DM> (legit)
* Kirran copies some of the pertinent stuff on the deities and the master sword down, then tucks all of it away in hammer space.
<Kirran> Let's get out of here before we get libraried to death.
<DM> [Raine]: Oi laud tha flippity jibbit ya blatherblouthin' flipper, wot's this 'bout some rippity ribbit?
* Dex magnets the book back once Kirran is done with it.
<Dex> I got plans for this book.
<DM> *Kirran, you see Raine is carefully scouring the pages of the book. Unfortunately..... she's stuck speaking Aussie.
<DM> *You incidentally magnet Raine over.
<Hal> What now, Dex Gamebreaker?
<Kirran> Really Dex?
<Dex> I'm pretty sure with another book I can make a floating platform so yes.
<Dex> YOU NEVER KNOW
<Kirran> You're going to take a book no one can read from the the closest thing to a scholar this group has?
<Dex> Welllllll only if you're done with it.
<Kirran> I do have a book of magic I can try code breaking it with.
<DM> [Raine]: Ah-right ya gribgrattin' whoremouthin' scumwasher, what's with this rickety Olden Hylian's book here matey?
<Hal> You have the Book of Mudora or something?
<Kirran> But not at this particular moment since I'm worried about the crazed book maniac of magnetism charging out after us.
<Hal> We really should be getting going.
<DM> *Speaking of which, you start to hear the doors behind you open.
* Hal runs off, over to Zuph
* Kirran gets going.
* Dex bolts again.
<DM> *You kindly run the heck away from there, praying you don't get killed by the knowledge of the universe itself.
<Kirran> (also no, just a regular book of magic. Some kind of imitation book of Mudora.
<Kirran> )
<DM> *Dex, you've actually been to Zuph's, so you end up taking the lead, heading over to the Twilight Village, and you find Zuph's shop. You also notice the other houses are actually here, not submerged into the ground, but that's another matter. As you arrive, the door opens, and Zuph seems to teleport in front of you all.
<Kirran> (jokes on you DM, I already have the knowledge of the universe.)
<DM> *He stares at you, though with his googly eyes, it's not a stare so much as an omni-angled ogle.
<DM> *He then gets to Dex, and the googly eyes meet and do a bit of a staring contest.
* Kirran teleports next to him.
<DM> [Zuph]: Ahh, the prodigal statue returns! Come, rest your weary stone feet, Mr. Statue, enter enter!
* Dex enter enters.
<Dex> Thanks.
<DM> *Kirran, you think you teleport next to him, but in the next moment, there's a golden flash of light and he's gone. Looking inside the shop, he's on the other side of the room.
* Kirran teleports over there.
<DM> *In fact, looking at Zuph, he's wearing a really shiny, flashy golden armor. Why, it... kind of sounds like it could be one of those Golden Artifacts the Spirit of Light mentioned.
<DM> *He pauses a moment, then looks up at you.
<Kirran> Hi.
<DM> *He then teleports around the room. Rapidly in succession. Within a few seconds, he's blinked more times than your eyes can keep up with, then appears right back next to you.
<DM> [Zuph]: Greetings, fellow warper.
<Kirran> I must admit, your warp-fu is superior.
<DM> [Zuph]: Yes, yes, indeeeeeeeeeed.
<DM> [Zuph]: So, you're all the lightworlders ol' Xanas was talkin' bout. Said you folks could use some, hmm, what's it called... superior upgrades, yes, hmm?
<DM> *He teleports around the room, pointing at his wares.
<Hal> Yes. We would like to buy stuff
<DM> *You see some pairs of Magnetic Gloves, some Gravity Slingshots, and even some of their- yeah just see the shop here - https://zurpg.sephiroth.ws/thread-1149.html - last post, second tab.
<DM> *Gonna have to call it a night here, twill run session next time, and expect there to be a development in the story shortly into it. Until then, both that shop and Global Shop are open and free to use.
<DM> *You're not pwned by a loading screen this time, just the sight of some high prices for some of said items.
<DM> -=SESSION END=-