AlmondAnon

Part 1

Apr 18th, 2015
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  1. >be you
  2. >be anon
  3. >be 20 year old uni student
  4. >be living off of federal loans because how the fuck else are you supposed to stay alive in this country?
  5. >be watching Netflix during a statistics lecture, because who in their right mind can stay fully attentive during a 3 hour lecture… about statistics…
  6. >You take a glance at the time
  7. >10 more minutes until freedom
  8. >You sigh and bury your face in your palm, rubbing your temples
  9. >Why were you even here?
  10. >Was college your decision, or was it one of those “last resort” options you were forced to retreat to?
  11. >You had so many aspirations and now you’re wasting government loan money sitting here watching movies in an expensive fucking class
  12. >You raise your head to look about the room
  13. >You weren’t the only one on the brink of sleep
  14. >It seems 2/3 of the class is struggling to wield their consciousness as well
  15. >The sight actually elicits a small grin from you
  16. >”How morbid” you think to yourself
  17. >There has to be at least $500,000 worth of students in this class and more than half of them don’t even want to be here
  18. >Oh America…
  19. >With a few more “oh my god I almost fell asleep but my head started to fall and I jolted awake”s later, the professor finally finishes up his last spiel and dismisses the class.
  20. >You toss your laptop in your backpack and totter off to go buy some energy supplement from the bookstore
  21. >You had a test later that afternoon and there was no way you were going to pass without some sort of pick-me-up.
  22. >Along the path, someone from the herd of students moving from one end of campus to another scopes you out and snags you from the crowd
  23. >He grips the handle of your backpack and yanks you to the side, away from the mass student migration
  24. >”Christ dude, you could just wave me over or something. No need to choke me.”
  25. “You look half dead, you wouldn’t have seen me.”
  26. >It was your good buddy ole’ pal Andrew, but you and your friends always called him Greg. There was no reason, it just always pissed him off so everyone just sort of stuck with it.
  27. >”What’d you need?” You ask, your voice rivaling that of a man on his death bed.
  28. “Bored as ass, want to smoke, eat some shit. You know, ‘people with no purpose’ type of things. You down?”
  29. >”Nah man, I’m off to the bookstore.”
  30. “Dude, lame. Wanna hang after your next class then?”
  31. >”Can’t. Got the cable guys coming to my place this evening. Internet’s been all fucky and I need to get it fixed.”
  32. “Ah. No worries then. Just hit me up when you’re free sometime, alright?”
  33. >”Sure thing. See ya Greggy boy.”
  34. “Go fuck yourself”
  35. >”Will do.”
  36. >He walks off with a smug smile and a final wave before merging with the river of debt induced youth
  37. >You roll your eyes and shake your head before turning the other direction to continue your trek toward the bookstore.
  38. >Before you’re able to continue walking though, your peripherals catch a glance of a man in the distance staring directly at you
  39. >This fucking guy again…
  40. >Ever since the start of your sophomore year this guy has just sort of… lurked…
  41. >You weren’t sure if you were the only one he stared at, but it seemed like out of any crowd, his eyes were fixed on you. When he was around, that is.
  42. >You had considered reporting him or something, but you then realized how well that would play over
  43. >”Uhm yeah, this creepy looking dude just stares at me from time to time. I don’t know his name or anything about him really, but he stares at me.”
  44. >Plus, you were a pretty large guy. If you were some pasty, frail, white bitch, they might actually care
  45. >But alas, you were blessed with anatomy that granted you the lifestyle of one who must fend for themselves… always...
  46. >You often wondered what it’s like to be some hot bitch, having the ability to just pick and choose from rich guys to marry
  47. >You’d never have to lift a finger, just let him fuck your ass from time to time and boom, all the riches you want.
  48. >Sounded nice, but the thought of a guy fucking your ass was enough to discourage the thought almost immediately.
  49. >You look up to see the gaze of the man in the distance is still fixated on you
  50. >You stare back for a few brief moments before lifting your middle finger to see if any sort of action would be returned
  51. >But no, all he does is stare
  52. >What a freak…
  53.  
  54. ------------------------------------
  55.  
  56. >A few hours pass you and you walk out of what was possibly the most miserably tedious exam of your entire life.
  57. >Not that it was all that hard, but you were about to slip into hibernation in there.
  58. >You’re pretty sure you fucked that test harder than your hand on lonely Friday nights, but right now you’re far from giving a shit.
  59. >The only thought your mind is capable of processing is bed.
  60. >Yes bed.
  61. >Bed is good.
  62. >Love bed.
  63. >You waddle your sleep deprived body back to your apartment.
  64. >You live about a mile away from campus, so the walk isn’t devastating, but it still sucks monkey wieners.
  65. >Upon your arrival, you grab the paper that resides on your welcome mat before dragging yourself inside to your sofa and lying down.
  66. >With little thought, you throw a blanket over your face and promptly pass out.
  67. ……………
  68. *KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK LOUD OBNOXIOUS KNOCKING KNOCKY KNOCK*
  69. >Your sleep is cut short as a loud knocking at your front door yanks you back into reality
  70. >”Y-yo?” You call out to the entity that knocks upon thy holy entry way.
  71. “It’s Comcast tech services, we’re here to fix the internet problems you called about.”
  72. >Oh fuck, you totally forgot.
  73. >They were supposed arrive here at 7, and you had gotten back from school at 4…
  74. >With the assistance complex mathematics, you’re able to decipher the amount of time you’ve been asleep for.
  75. >You throw the blanket from your face and shake the sleep from your head.
  76. >”I’m so sorry, I was napping and I totally forgot to set an alarm!”
  77. >Opening the door, you’re met with a nerdy looking dude that sports a totally wicked neckbeard and wears the creepiest express—wait a minute.
  78. “No worries, it’s been a long day.” He chuckles
  79. >You stare is misbelief for a moment.
  80. >”D-Do I know you?” You ask the man.
  81. “I think I’ve seen you around campus once or twice.” He responds with a knowing grin.
  82. >Mother fucker it’s the guy…
  83. >Seriously what the fuck is this shit?
  84. >This is horror movie tier! This fucker is going to murder you or something!
  85. “May I come in?” He asks.
  86. >”U-uhh, y-yea sure thing. My bad.”
  87. >You step aside to allow him entry.
  88. >WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING?
  89. >MAKE HIM GO AWAY!
  90. >SHOO SCARY MAN! SHOO!
  91. >You turn to watch as the man makes his way into your living space before your eyes catch a small glimpse of the clock on your microwave in the kitchen.
  92. >The clock shows it’s only 6:38..
  93. >Wait…
  94. >Waiiiiiiiit…
  95. >”You’re uhm, rather early.” You note.
  96. “Yeah, finished my last appointment sooner than expected. Figured I’d just hit the next house a bit early. Hope you don’t mind?”
  97. >You’re still trying to process what the fuck this man is doing in your apartment.
  98. >In an attempt to break the apparent tension, you continue with the small talk.
  99. >”Yeah, no, not at all! I had no idea you, uhm… worked for Comcast.”
  100. “Yyyyup. Work is shit but the pay is nice.”
  101. >You nod with a fake little chuckle as to make it seem like you relate with his sentiments before an eerie silence consumes the room.
  102. “So… The internet?”
  103. >”A-ah! Right. Uhm, down the little hall into the small room on your right is where the modem is, feel free to have a look.”
  104. “Thank you sir.”
  105. >He gives you an affirmative nod before bumbling off down the hall.
  106. >In a sudden little panic, you excuse yourself to go grab the mace you leave in your backpack and toss it into your pocket.
  107. -
  108. >Should you just leave?
  109. >Would it be appropriate to leave this man in your house while he works on your stuff?
  110. >He could totally rob you.
  111. >Maybe he really does just work for Comcast and you’re making the situation out to be way more than it really is.
  112. >You’d be keen on believing that scenario if this weren’t the exact same guy that literally just stares into your soul at school.
  113. >Maybe he just stares because he’s a socially awkward people watcher that somehow finds you more interesting than all the other kids on campus.
  114. >You stand painfully still as your entire focus is lost in the flurry of panic swarming throughout your mind before a voice from down the hall pulls you back to the situation.
  115. “Hey uhh, where’s the cable outlet in here?”
  116. >You walk to the room where creepy man resides, standing in the doorframe as you look down at him sprawled out on the floor with his tools, the notorious “working man ass crack” flashing brighter than the waking sun.
  117. >”Behind the little bookshelf with the colorful horses on it.”
  118. “Ah, I see. Many thanks.”
  119. >He proceeds to continue his work, unhooking the cable from the splitter in the wall and plugging it into his little device.
  120. >”So I uhm… Never caught your name.”
  121. “Sparkling Charm is my birth name, but I just go by Sparky.”
  122. >You squint your eyes a bit in thought.
  123. >Sparkling Charm?
  124. >What type of name is that?
  125. >He takes note of your confused expression and chuckles.
  126. “Yeah I get it, it’s an odd name. Many tell me it’s something a little girl would name a pony or something.”
  127. >He smiles and gestures at the MLP figures on the bookshelf adjacent to him.
  128. --------
  129. >You give him a mildly concerned smile.
  130. >Is there a joke you’re missing, or..?
  131. >You wouldn’t be surprised if the dude were a super autist himself and he’s trying to call you out or something. His looks fit that of a textbook horsefucker.
  132. >Sure you enjoyed the show and had a few figurines, but you never really considered yourself much of a “Brony” as you hated the fandom and disassociated any interest you had in the show with the fans of it.
  133. “So is it just you that lives here?” He asks.
  134. >You’re about to answer him without hesitation when you stop yourself.
  135. >Why would he ask a question like this?
  136. >You conjure a quick little lie.
  137. >”U-uh, no actually. I live with my girlfriend.”
  138. “Girlfriend huh? What’s her name?”
  139. >It seems to just be some more harmless small talk, but you have no idea what this dude could do with that information.
  140. >Again, maybe none of this is that big of a deal, but there was always something about his eyes when he stared at you on campus.
  141. >Almost like he wanted something, like he was hunting you down. Not violently, but possessively. You know the eyes a man wears when he sees a bunch of just-now-legals lying topless at the poolside. Yeah, those eyes.
  142. >”C.. Cam.. Clair… Claire! Claire is her name.”
  143. “Claire? Cute. I guess that would explain all the pony toys, hmm?”
  144. >You give him an awkward nod and a small laugh as you rub your arm nervously.
  145. “Wish I could find a little lady myself, but where I’m from, they’re far and few between these days.”
  146. >”O-oh?”
  147. “Mhm. It’s actually getting so bad that some guys are kidnapping potential mates from other places and bringing them back.”
  148. >You act surprised as if to humor him.
  149. >”Oh man, that sounds pretty rough.”
  150. “Yeah. It’s a madhouse, that’s for sure.”
  151. >”Where are you from again?”
  152. >He’s about to answer when you see a van pull up outside through the window.
  153. >You take a few steps forward, unintentionally interrupting him before he has the chance to speak.
  154. >A couple of guys hop out of the van and shut the doors to reveal the Comcast logo.
  155. >Wait a second…
  156. >You pull out your phone to check the time.
  157. >7:06pm
  158. >Upon further examination of the parking lot, you realize there is no other Comcast/cable company type vehicles around...
  159. >You freeze for a moment, letting all the puzzle pieces fit themselves together.
  160. >Your stomach sinks
  161. >Holy fuck…
  162. >You turn to face the stranger in your home once more.
  163. >”Okay bud, who the fuck are you, and what the fuck are you doing in my apa—“
  164. >You’re interrupted as a napkin meets your face and restricts your airflow.
  165. >You squirm like mad as you feel contact being made, but can only do so much before an almost instantaneous drowsiness consumes you and your strength dwindles.
  166. >You hear him speak softly, almost as if to comfort you.
  167. “It’s alright. Shh, it’s okay. I would never hurt you.”
  168. >What the fuck is going on…
  169. >Before you have any more time to fret, you’re out like a light.
  170. ------------------------
  171.  
  172.  
  173. Note:
  174. Hate to end on such a cliche cliffhanger, but I had to.
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