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  1. Absolute Unit (n): a staggeringly chonky cat
  2.  
  3. Accempt (v): to graciously receive the offering of a peet, leggie, etc.
  4.  
  5. Airplane Ears (n): when a cat flattens and angles its ears, so they look like the wings of an airplane; often a sign of irritation, wild play, or interest in a noise behind them; also: owl ears, NYEEEEER
  6.  
  7. Angy / Amgy (adj): adorably angry; e.g. “no talk me im angy”
  8.  
  9. Angery / Angory (adj): very grumpy indeed
  10.  
  11. Attacc (v): to lunge at
  12.  
  13. Baked Beans (n): when a cat extends its paws toward a heat source, e.g. a radiator or fireplace
  14.  
  15. Bamboozle (v): to do a heckin confuse
  16.  
  17. Bebby (n/adj): kitten, small or adorable cat
  18.  
  19. Beans (n): 1. toes; 2. kittens
  20.  
  21. Bean Sprouts (n): tufts of fur between toes; also: toe hawks, toe beards
  22.  
  23. Big Steppy (n): a s t r e t c h u m with only 1 peet forward
  24.  
  25. Bikkies (n): dry cat food; see also: lööps, cromchies
  26.  
  27. Bipod / Bi-pawed (n): two-legged cat
  28.  
  29. Birb (n): feathered and flighted creature; the fortunate have cats to alert them to the presence of such a creature with the warning sound ekekekekekek
  30.  
  31. Blep (n / v): when a cat forgets to retract its tongue, resulting in hilarity
  32.  
  33. Boi (n): a cat, often but not necessarily male, can be modified with a descriptor (e.g. nakeyboi, nortyboi)
  34.  
  35. Bonk (v): to lovingly headbutt one’s hooman; also: nudgems
  36.  
  37. Boop (v): to touch a cat’s nose with one finger, e.g. “boop the snoot”
  38.  
  39. Bøtthörle / Bøthörłê (n): butt hole, see also: pööplööp
  40.  
  41. Bröther (n): human, provider of lööps; also: möther, fäther
  42.  
  43. Cat Tax (n): the sharing of a cat photo along with one’s post as an offering to the group
  44.  
  45. Cate / Cade (n): cat
  46.  
  47. Catio (n): the structure attached to a chonk’s house that allows said chonk to sit behind a screen, daydreaming about chonk cat stuffs
  48.  
  49. Cattitude (n): the state of being a catto with attitude; sass
  50.  
  51. Catto (n): cat
  52.  
  53. Cattoo (n): tattoo of a cat
  54.  
  55. Chimken (n): 1. a favorite food of chonks; 2. a nakey catto
  56.  
  57. Chirp (v): to make the “ekekekekek” sound when observing a toy or birb
  58.  
  59. Chonk (n): a rotund cat
  60.  
  61. Chonk in training (n): cat or kitten who is not quite chonky yet but has chonk potential
  62.  
  63. Chonkette (n): a lady chonk, may be pragónté
  64.  
  65. Chonklet / Chonklette (n): chonky kitten
  66.  
  67. Chooch (v): to do a thing or to function well, e.g. “he’s choochin so good!”
  68.  
  69. Choocher (n): one who chooches, e.g. “what a good choocher”
  70.  
  71. Chumby (adj): rather plump, e.g. “chumby in the tumby”
  72.  
  73. Chungus (n): an epic chonky cat; e.g. “a chungus among us”
  74.  
  75. Cloud (n): white cat
  76.  
  77. Cow (n): white cat with black markings
  78.  
  79. Cromch / Cronch (v): to eat by crunching wif one’s teefs
  80.  
  81. Cromchies (n): dry cat food; see also: bikkies, lööps
  82.  
  83. Danger Hamb / Danger Chonk (n): large wildcat, like a lion, cheetah, tiger, etc.
  84.  
  85. Do a __ (v): to do, often with a certain panache and vigor. Usually followed by a noun or adjective. e.g. “do a blep”, “do a lewd”
  86.  
  87. Doggo (n): dogs; also: pupper, pupperino
  88.  
  89. Donk (n): chonky dog, or a dog that thinks it’s a chonk; also: badonkadonk
  90.  
  91. Dörty (adj): unclean or lewd
  92.  
  93. Drumstick (n): one extended back leg, reminiscent of a rotisserie chimken; see also: leggie
  94.  
  95. Ear furnishings (n): fur tufts inside a cat’s ears; also: ear beards
  96.  
  97. Ekekekekekek (interjection): the chirping sound a cat makes whilst bird watching
  98.  
  99. Elevator Butt (n): when a cat is enjoying rump scritches and raises their butt in excitement
  100.  
  101. Famcy (adj): fancy; e.g. "he a famcy boi in a big bow tie"
  102.  
  103. Flonk (n): a cat so fluffy they appear to be chonky; may or may not be chonky under all that fur (see secret slonk)
  104.  
  105. Floof (n): a fluffy cat or kitten
  106.  
  107. Floofy / Flonfy (adj): fluffy or long-haired
  108.  
  109. Foob / Füd (n): sustenance
  110.  
  111. Forbidden cats (n): raccoons, possums, red pandas, otters, etc.
  112.  
  113. Freshly Baked Beans (n): newborn kittens
  114.  
  115. Gib (v): give
  116.  
  117. Görl (n): female cat
  118.  
  119. Gremlin (n): a grompy hairless cat
  120.  
  121. Grompy (adj): cranky or ill-tempered, high probability of airplane ears and murder mittens
  122.  
  123. Hamb (n): cat
  124.  
  125. Hambi (n): a hamb of unknown gender
  126.  
  127. Hambina (n): a female hamb
  128.  
  129. Hambino (n): a male hamb
  130.  
  131. Hamblet / Hamblette (n): kitten; also: hambelina, hambini, bacon bit
  132.  
  133. Hambsome (adj): very nice looking and dapper, may be dressed to impress in a nice tie or tophat
  134.  
  135. Heckin (adj): used as an intensifier to emphasize an action; e.g. “he do a heckin’ screm for more foob”
  136.  
  137. Henlo (interjection): hello
  138.  
  139. Herb (pronoun): refers to a female cat, e.g. “I LOVE HERB”
  140.  
  141. Himb (pronoun): refers to a male cat, e.g. “I LUV HIMB”
  142.  
  143. Honky (n): oriental Shorthair cats with meows that sound like a goose honk
  144.  
  145. Hooman (n): bringer of foob, giber of pets, scooper of poops; also: peasant, slave
  146.  
  147. If I fits, I sits (mantra): cat logic for determining appropriate places for repose
  148.  
  149. Kitty Glitter (n): the inescapable peppering of cat fur on clothing and furniture
  150.  
  151. Land Orca (n): a chonky tuxedo cat
  152.  
  153. Leggie / Legge (n): a cat’s leg, specifically one leg splayed out or “presemted”
  154.  
  155. Lewd (adj): brazen display of a cat’s norty bits for all the world to see
  156.  
  157. Loaf (v / n): when a cat sits with all paws tucked under, resembling a loaf of bread
  158.  
  159. Long boi / Lomgboi (n): when a cat stretches out and looks very l o n g
  160.  
  161. Lööps (n): cromchy dry cat food; see also: bikkies, cromchies
  162.  
  163. Lorge (adj): large, e.g. “lorge and in chorge”
  164.  
  165. Low Rider (n): cat with short legs and/or belly that hangs down close to the ground
  166.  
  167. Make Biscuits (v): to knead on an item or person
  168.  
  169. -Air biscuits (n): kneading into the ether; also: sky biscuits
  170.  
  171. -Prison Biscuits (n): kneading with claws extended; also: murder biscuits, spicy biscuits
  172.  
  173. -Sin biscuits (n): um... sexytimes, often with the unauthorized usage of a stuffed toy or other household object which then becomes the sole property of the cat
  174.  
  175. Marshmallow (n): a white or cream colored floof
  176.  
  177. Merp (v): to make a sudden vocalization expressing surprise or alarm, as when disturbed from slumber; also: brrrp, bwurr, murph
  178.  
  179. Mlem (v): when a cat briefly extends its tongue in a licking motion
  180.  
  181. Mönch (v): to eat with enthusiasm
  182.  
  183. Murder Mittens (n): paws with the claws out; also: danger peets, spicy steppers, mean beans
  184.  
  185. Nakey (adj): sphinx cat or a shaved cat
  186.  
  187. Nip Nops (n): nipples; hated by the Zuck; e.g. “there better not be any heckin nip nops in here”
  188.  
  189. Norty (adj): naughty, a cat who is misbehaving
  190.  
  191. Oh Lawd, S/He Comin’ (interjection): phrase used in reference to the approach of an absolute unit
  192.  
  193. Pantaloons (n): the fluff on the back legs and booty of a cat
  194.  
  195. Patto (v): to pet a catto
  196.  
  197. Peet / Peets (n): cat paws/feet; see also: steppers
  198.  
  199. Pirate (n): cat with one eye
  200.  
  201. Plop (v): to suddenly and dramatically flop into a laying position; also: plorp, flump, flop
  202.  
  203. Pointy (adj): when a cats claws are extended; see also: murder mittens
  204.  
  205. Pooch (n): the pouch of many names; the droopy underbelly section that sways when a cat walks; also: fupa, T U M, snacc sacc, chub, jelly belly, flabdomen, chumbles, paunch, flub, cookie pouch, mud flap, floop, etc.
  206.  
  207. Pööplööp (n): butthole, also: bøtthörle
  208.  
  209. Poopie Zoomies (n): when a cat races at full speed away from the litterbox after dropping a poop; also: crap lap, poophoria, poomies
  210.  
  211. Poot (n / v): 1. fart; 2. singular of peets, meaning one paw; also: pøøt or pööt
  212.  
  213. Potate (n / v): a chonky cat in the loaf position / to be lazy
  214.  
  215. Pragónté (adj): pregnant; also: pregananant, pergenat, peegnate, pergert, gregnant, pragnart, prangent, pegrant, pregonate, pergenat, pargnet, pgrenant, etc. ad infinitum
  216.  
  217. Pspspspspsps (interjection): a summoning spell for hambs, effectiveness may vary
  218.  
  219. Purralyzed (adj): when a cat is laying on you so you can’t move
  220.  
  221. Purrito (n): 1. a very cozy kitten or cat, typically wrapped in a blanket and purring; 2. a perturbed cat swaddled against its will
  222.  
  223. Razzle Dazzle (v): to sit with one leg pointing skyward like a pinup model, often lewd; e.g. “give ‘em the ol’ razzle dazzle”
  224.  
  225. Salami / Little a salami (n): a snacc for hambs; a little should be just fine as a treat
  226.  
  227. Screm (v): 1. to meow in dismay; 2. to appear to be screaming when caught mid-yawn
  228.  
  229. Secret Slonk (n): cat that appears to be chonky but is really just fluffy
  230.  
  231. Schmoo / Schmoopy (n): a very loved cat
  232.  
  233. Shrimpin (v): to lay curled up in a shrimp shape, sometimes while hugging one’s leggies
  234.  
  235. Sing the Song of My People (v): to meow repeatedly for no particular reason, often in the wee hours of the morning
  236.  
  237. Sky Raisin (n): a fly
  238.  
  239. Slonk (n): a slender cat
  240.  
  241. Slow Blink (v / n): a sign of affection and contentment, one of the highest forms of chonk praise offered to a hooman; also: love eyes, slow winkies
  242.  
  243. Smol (adj): of diminutive stature/build (can still be chonky)
  244.  
  245. Snacc (n / v): treats or snacks / to eat excitedly; see also: monch, cromch
  246.  
  247. Snoot (n): a cat’s nose
  248.  
  249. Snoozle (n / v): a nap / to take a nap
  250.  
  251. Snout Sprouts (n): whiskers
  252.  
  253. Socks (n): markings on a cats feet that resemble socks; also: boots
  254.  
  255. Spicy (adj): of sassy, surly, or rambunctious demeanor; the state of having cattitude
  256.  
  257. Spicy Sky Raisin (n): a bee or wasp
  258.  
  259. Sploot (v): to lay on stomach with legs splayed out behind, sometimes with paws stretched out in front too
  260.  
  261. Spoopy (adj): heckin scary; do himb a startle
  262.  
  263. Steppers (n): a cat’s feet
  264.  
  265. Stimk Face (n): the dismayed, open-mouthed expression a cat makes after smelling something pungent
  266.  
  267. Stimky / Stonky (adj): do not like, bad smelling, e.g. “stimky doggo”
  268.  
  269. Stompies (n): the act of walking all over a hooman
  270.  
  271. S t r e t c h u m s (n): a cat stretch
  272.  
  273. Teefs (n): teeth; also: toofs, toofers, teefers
  274.  
  275. Terminal Baby Disease (n): the affliction of being just baby, very common in felines
  276.  
  277. Thicc (adj): of ample build
  278.  
  279. Toasted Marshmallow (n): a white floof with darker coloration on its ears, paws, and/or tail; e.g. siamese and ragdolls
  280.  
  281. Tortie (n): a tortoiseshell cat (black, brown, and amber fur patterns)
  282.  
  283. Tortitude (n): the state of being a tortie with attitude/charisma
  284.  
  285. Triangle Tail (n): the wobbly stage of kittenhood during which the tail is a triangle shape
  286.  
  287. Tripod / Tripawed (n): cat with three legs
  288.  
  289. Troublepuffs (n): norty bits of a male cat
  290.  
  291. Tummy Trap (n): an exposed cat belly you really want to pet, but are likely to encounter murder mittens; also: danger floof
  292.  
  293. Tuxedo (n): black cat with white marks, especially on chest and belly area
  294.  
  295. Two of Them / (__ of themb!) (interjection): an exclamation in response to multiple cats, generally of similar size, breed, or color
  296.  
  297. Void (n): black cat, also: hauspanther, soot sprite
  298.  
  299. Wonky (adj): special needs cat
  300.  
  301. Zoomies (n): when a cat races around at full-speed, often at 2 am; usually includes kitty parkour, murder mittens may be in use as well; also: zooms, rips, NYOOOOOOM
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