-- FB sets the interface to select the cruxtruder for deployment. --

CVS: Yep!
CFB: THERRE appearrs to be a larrge device that is frree to make use OF. ANY parrticularr arreas you'd prreferr I place IT?
CUV: make sure it's somewhere with a lotta room but is reasonably accessible
CFB: BYRROSS?
CUV: jes' trust me on this'n
CVS: I think that's a good idea, yes.

Clerus places the cruxtruder in the living room.

CFB: I'VE placed it in that larrge rroom towarrd the centerr of yourr HIVE.
CFB: I'M not surre what it's supposed to do, but therre arre a few otherr ones that I can place while you figurre it OUT?
CVS: Okay, that works for me.
CMC: So we need a lot of clear space you think?
CUV: yeah an' it's best if'n y'can keep the bits close together so's ye're not runnin' 'round like a headless cluckbeast tryin' t' get from one t'the next

Maia grabbed her phone again and heads downstairs to the living room, wobbling a bit and clinging hard to the rickety-looking railing.

CVS: By the by, what's a hive? A house?
CMC: You seem to know a lot, UV.
CUV: essentially
CUV: marm i'm summat of an afficionado on th'whole esoteric knowledge shebang
CUV: knowin' random excrement's part o' my persona as it were
CUV: mebbe not stuff that seems useful right off th'bat
CUV: but y'never know when it might come in handy
CFB: WATCH your step, VS, I don't think I can catch you if you FALL.
CMC: Her house is a bit awful. I think it's nearly 100 years old.

Maia gets to the bottom of the stairs and sits down, panting a little.

CVS: Thank you, captain obvious. D<
CVS: I'm fine.
CFB: I'M just being concerrned forr yourr SAFETY.
CFB: PERRHAPS we can eventually find some way to deal with yourr injurry that is allowed within the mechanics of the GAME?
CVS: Can always hope. X.x Concussions are not fun.
CMC: ... Damnit Maia. I'm pretty sure I gave your mom some head medicine the last time I saw her. Check your bathroom when you get a chance.
CVS: Yeah yeah will do.

Maia heads to the living room and blinks at the machine.

CVS: And holy shit, there is in fact a machine sitting in my living room. Ladies and gentlemen, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.
CUV: ref'rence not secured marm but i'm sure we get th'sentiment
CMC: We weren't in Kansas in the first place dear.
CFB: ...WHAT'S a KANSAS?
CMC: Maia, what did you just get me into?

Clerus looks at the remaining devices, placing them as instructed near the other two, careful to avoid obstructing any doorways or halls.

CUV: hahahah well marm if'n ye're feelin' jes' a tad skittish y'can always step out
CUV: nothin' fer the faint o' heart as it were

Maia watches them be placed down, shaking her head in amazement. She tries cranking the wheel on the Cruxtruder.

CVS: Shit this thing is jammed. ><
CMC: Oooooh no, I'm not leaving her alone with you.
CFB: I'M perrfectly TRRUSTWORRTHY.

Clerus tries interacting further with the cruxtruder, but apparently can't play with the wheel or lid, either. Spotting a curtainrod, he appropriates it and jams it in the wheel.

CFB: TRRY using that forr LEVERRAGE.

Maia does, but it doesn't seem to help. Her eyes narrow and she pulls it out of the wheel, and fiddles until she can get the cap up and it jammed in. She pushes hard, trying to jimmy it up, but she's straining and it doesn't seem to be coming.

CFB: LET me help, but give me a little ROOM.
CFB: FINE contrrol doesn't seem to be a parrticularrly easy thing to manage with this PRROGRRAM.
CVS: Okay.

Maia backed up into the hall, so she can duck behind the door for cover.

CMC: What are you two doing?
CUV: shenanigans marm jes' wait yer turn c|;D

Picking up a nearby bookcase, Clerus repeatedly bashes the top of the cruxtruder until the cap flies open, destroying the bookcase in the process.

CFB: ERRRR, sorrrry about THAT.

Maia grabs her hair and pulls on it, clearly distressed.

CVS: OH MY GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
CVS: MY GRANDFATHER MADE THAT THERE'S NO WAY TO REPLACE IT.

The young woman looks ready to cry.

Lacking a nearby handkerchief to offer her, Clerus grabs a towel... which he proceeds to drop on her head.

CFB: I'LL trry to fix it, just give me a MOMENT!

He picks up the pieces, but can't do anything more than hit them against eachother.

CFB: ...SORRRRY, I can't rreelly do anything morre, but I'm surre it was forr a good CAUSE!

The heat on his face was the only thing letting the troll know he was blushing furiously in embarassment. He hadn't been a clod like this in sweeps! And destroying priceless heirlooms? At some point, he'd have to ask Byross about how to properly make it up to this VS woman.

Maia snatches the towel from her head and immediately regrets it, sitting down hard and clutching her head in agony...

And that's when she noticed the seizure ball. She had to turn her back on it immediately.

CVS: ... What the fuck. Seizure ball. D:
CUV: y'got anything handy what y'wouldn't mind fightin' a legion of somewhere along th'line
CUV: an' havin' t'play against it as some kinda weird as hell theme
CUV: like mebbe y'got a movie poster or a picture of someone what spurned yer advances
CVS: oO I'm the beta tester and you know more about this game than I do.
CVS: Startin' to weird me out a bit dude.
CMC: Seizure ball? Maia, you need to go take one of the immulsions immediately.
CFB: NO, I see it, TOO.
CUV: well sometimes esoteric knowledge includes servers what got halfway finished walkthroughs on 'em
CUV: written by kids b'fore they tossed 'em into regions o' paradox space that're untouched by time an' whatnot
CUV: was summat of a surprise t'find it t'be honest
CVS: .-. Woah.
CVS: Well then... uh...
CVS: FB, could you look back upstairs? There's a chest with flowers painted on it at the foot of my bed.
CVS: I want what's inside but you can just bring the whole thing down.

Quick to obey the group leader, Clerus scrolled around until he found the chest in question. Rather than risk destroying it like he had the bookcase, he carefully... carefully... CAREFULLY moved it out of the room and down the stairs, setting it directly in front of VS without so much as a worryingly loud thump.

CFB: IS this the rright ONE?
CVS: Yes, thank you.

Maia smiles and fiddles with the latch until she gets it open, pushing the lid up and back to reveal an old porceline doll with dozens of dresses and wigs. It looks like it's been old and cherished for generations.

CVS: Was gonna give this to my daughter when I had one but it's one thing I can think of that wouldn't be too hard to fight. C|
CUV: y'fergot th'face under that hat
CFB: ...YOU don't look half as malicious as most females I've met when you SMILE.

Clerus peeked inside the chest, noting that... it was an awful lot like his pile of "action figures" in a similar trunk in his quarters. Just without the generations of love attached to it. And quite possibly a lack of tea parties to associate with, for that matter.

CFB: AND what'rre we supposed to do with IT?
CUV: y'throw it in th'seizure kernel
CVS: Do I have to throw or is there some way to call it over? 8c
CMC: And she has a habit of flipping her faces over.
CUV: well marm y'can try what'cha want but th'guide don't cover gettin' th'sprite t'listen to yeh
CVS: Hrm. Alright, I just don't want to break her...
CVS: Maybe you'd have more luck FB?
CFB: I'LL give it a TRRY.

Gingerly, or as close to that as one can manage when operating a mouse on a hamfisted program, Clerus took the aforementioned doll. He watched the kernel's movements for a moment, trying to debate if it would move out of the way if he were to try to poke it with said item. Deciding that hesitation was for the week, he wound up simply thrusting it into the seizure kernel. The doll disappeared with a flash, replaced by the kernelsprite that was, for the time being, essentially just a doll icon floating in the air.

CFB: ...I'M going to wind up destrroying everry heirrloom in yourr house, arren't I?

Maia simply boggled for a moment.

CMC: What did you do now?
CFB: THE "seizurre kerrnel" ate the DOLL.
CFB: IT'S completely GONE.
CFB: AND the kerrnel turrned into a doll HEAD.
CUV: well y'got more important things t'worry 'bout now that yeh've got yer countdown runnin'
CVS: COUNTDOWN?

Maia pushed the chest aside, heading into the living room to stare at the cruxtruder.

CUV: to impact o'course
CMC: Impact?
CUV: celestial bodies ain't always a figure o' speech
CUV: flamin' boulder zeroed in on yer six marm
CVS: ... 9:25. Shit what do we need to do?
CUV: well y'gotta turn that crank an' pop out a dowel
CUV: gotta carve it with th'design on the prepunched card
CUV: then y'take it over to the circle platform an' it'll make a fancy item fer ya what y'gotta do summat random with
CUV: and that's all of what's on yer plate
CUV: if y'can manage that before th'timer's up then ye're golden
CVS: Uhm... I'll need the card then.

Maia quickly gets to work cranking the cruxtruder until she can get a dowel. MEANWHILE, elsewhere in paradox space, Clerus deployed the prepunched card, placing it neatly next to the totem lathe.
Maia carries the dowel over to the totem lathe and gets it to clamp onto the dowel, then picks up the card. She finds the slot for it and puts it in, then jumps back, startled by the blades and carving.

CVS: A;LSJDF;LAJSDF;LJSD
CUV: it's called a totem lathe marm emphasis on lathe
CUV: do try t'avoid gettin' yerself more dinged up than y'already are
CVS: Duly. Noted.
CMC: The three of you are making me more and more nervous.
CUV: haha well yeh'll prolly be more nervous when y'got some voyeur breathin' down yer neck as ye're doin' this
CFB: I'M not being a VOYEURR!
CFB: I am conducting myself with DIGNITY!
CFB: AND besides, VS is serrverring forr herr, I'm surre they trrust EACHOTHERR.

Maia carefully takes the now-carved totem to the Alchemiter and places it down. It scans the totem, and abruptly a camera appears on the larger pad.

CMC: Precisely.
CVS: The shit am I supposed to do with this? And down to 7:15.
CFB: DOES it function NORRMALLY?

She tries taking a picture. Nothing happens.

CVS: Nope.
CFB: IS therre a chance that maybe something inside it is keeping it frrom WORRKING?
CVS: Hrrrm... maybe. But I don't have any film canisters on me...

Maia fiddles with it, trying several times to get it to work and shaking it a few times. "Grr..."

CFB: WHAT'RRE you doing with IT?
CFB: IT looks like you'rre trrying to brreak IT.
CVS: Seeing if I can shake any obstructions loose.
CFB: CAN'T you... open it up to check forr them in the firrst PLACE?
CFB: MIGHT be a differrent rreason forr it to not be WORRKING.
CVS: Well it's worth a shot. Just gotta hope.

Maia quickly pries it open, lifting the film out as cautiously as she can manage. It's slippery though, and she quickly drops the camera while trying not to drop either. The camera lands with a sickening noise and something spills out of it, then both the camera and the mess disappear.

CVS: WTF.
CFB: ARRE you ALRRIGHT?
CVS: I'm fine but all I've got left is the film and we're down to six minutes.
CUV: mebbe th'film needs t'be developed
CUV: or there's summat important on there
CVS: Hope I didn't ruin it then. Backroom's a development room though.

She bundles it into her shirt and walks carefully down the hall, bumping a door open and ducking inside. It's almost black, with only low red lights on.

CFB: OKAY, I can't rreelly see what's going on therre, so I'm not surre how much help I can BE.
CVS: Yeah I'm gonna be quiet for a bit.

Maia starts pinning the film up, trying to see if there's anything. Nothing she can see here, and developing the film would take hours, not minutes.

CVS: Shit.
CUV: well can y'see what's on th'film if'n y'look at it close
CVS: I am looking at it close enough!
CVS: There isn't anything.
CFB: DO you need morre LIGHT?
CFB: ORR is it rreelly just NOTHING?
CVS: More light would ruin the film, but I think it's really nothing.
VCS: 8/ How much time do we have left?

Clerus scrolls back to the cruxtruder, taking a look, then reports back to VS.

CFB: WELL, you'rre down to just overr a minute LEFT.
CVS: SHIT.

Maia chewed her lower lip, thinking hard, then reluctantly grabs the film and puts her hand on the doorknob, hesitating.

CFB: NOW you arre at a CRROSSRROADS!
CFB: DO not hesitate, forr the only way to prroceed is thrrough ACTION!
CFB: CAST aside yourr doubts and fearrs, knowing that no matterr which dirrection you take, it is a dirrection of yourr CHOOSING!
CUV: where th'rainbow spewin' hells did that one come from clerus

She's a bit surprised by the words, but nods, closing her eyes and throwing the door open, then lifting the film to the light. It's ruined, and abruptly Maia looses connection. Clerus can see the meteor hit, but there seems to be a shimmer to the house before her connection re-establishes.

CMC: WTF.
CFB: HAHAH! GLORRIOUS SUCCESS!
CFB: STATUS RREPORRT?

Maia sits on her arse, half in and half out of the room and blinking at the film that disappears from her hands abruptly.

CVS: I'm okay 0_0
CFB: INJURRIES?
CFB: A meteorr just strruck where yourr home was SITUATED.
CFB: BUT seeing as you've rreconnected, I'm assuming that the shimmerr I saw was RRELOCATION.
CVS: WHAT?!
CMC: WHAT?!

Maia scrambles to her feet, practically running to the front door and opening it. The kernelsprite zooms past her, then splits. She gapes at it.

CFB: HOLD on, wherre'd you rrun off TO?
CFB: I can't move past the DOORR.
CVS: HOLY GODDAMN SHIT

~ The Keeper of Bliss has entered the Land of Glow and Festivities ~

Maia's house now sits on a huge platform, high above what appears to be a huge carnival. She clings to the doorframe, gaping. The platform seems to represent the furthest Clerus's mouse can go.

CFB: OKAY, I'm not surre what to do frrom HERRE.
CUV: oh jes' one more thing t'suggest
CUV: y'got another thing what's reasonably dear t'yer vascular system
CUV: b'cause tossin' it in th' sprite now that ye're in th'game is s'posed t'be the way to go
CUV: an' that's 'bout the extent of my info
CVS: Um... okay.

She quickly backed back into the house, shutting the door and heading back to the living room. A ghostly doll, colored lightly purple, followed her. It seems to be trying to get her attention.

CFB: SO, as farr as ghostly lorre is concerrned, how much does colorr come into PLAY?
CMC: Color how? Washed out, or a total lack, or full saturation?
CFB: WASHED out, but I mean morre specifically the colorr ITSELF.
CFB: VS, that thing behind you, what colorr is IT?

Maia spun around and let out a little shriek, falling down again.

CVS: Purple
CMC: oO Ghosts aren't a single color...
CFB: YOU should considerr taking a brreak frrom this constant falling, VS.
CVS: I think I'm gonna sit right here until I stop feeling pukey.
CMC: FB, look in the bathroom. There should be a black basket in there.
CFB: BATHRROOM, EH? I'LL take a LOOK.

Luckily, as a member of the nautical aristocracy, Clerus was one of the elite few to be familiar with the term "bathtub," and was able to reason out the purpose of a bathroom by virtue of that. He scanned the tiled locale, frowning thoughtfully as he did so.

CFB: DO you know offhand which arrea in herre it happens to be IN?
CFB: OH, wait, I think I found IT.

Well, it certainly was -a- black basket. Whether or not it was the one mentioned by MC would remain to be seen. With the same obsessive care that he'd used in transporting the trunk, Clerus brought the basket to Maia.

CFB: WILL something in therre be HELPFUL?
CMC: Yes. Maia, you want the green bottle with the spoon tied around it.

Maia carefully dug through the basket until she finds the bottle mentioned.

CVS: Uh, 455839?
CMC: That's the one. I want you to half-fill the spoon and take that. FB, she needs to do that every half hour.
CFB: CONSIDERR yourr edict ENFORRCED!
CMC: Thank you. It should prevent brain damage.
CVS: Yes ma'am.

Maia takes the dose, making a horrible face.

CVS: Disgusting as always Melinda.
CMC: It's not good for you to take too much of it, of course it's disgusting.
CUV: plenty o' things what're bad for you taste jes' fine
CMC: It's an old theory of medicine, and it's sort of traditional to follow it.
CVS: The worst it tastes the better it is for you, and the less likely you are to abuse it.
CUV: never hurts t'throw in a little gigglewater if'n it's too vile
CVS: A little .... Yeah I know.
CVS: It's fine though and giggle juice isn't good for concussions.
CMC: Exactly.
CUV: suit yerself
CFB: ...MAYBE we should get back to the matterr at HAND?
CVS: Good idea. Um. Shit. This isn't going to be fun...
CFB: THE rrunning arround with a parrtially trreated concussion, orr something ELSE?
CVS: The former.

Maia slowly climbs to her feet, tottering a little. Then she points to a vase on the mantle.

CVS: Could you put that in the ghosty thing?
CFB: ALRRIGHT, but would it be imperrtinent to ask what's in IT?
CVS: It's my grandfather's ashes.
CFB: I'M guessing that's a culturral THING.
CUV: stop questioning an' jes' put it in y'big dugus
CFB: FINE FINE.

As instructed, Clerus moves the cursor over to the ashes. The sprite accepts the prototyping without complaint, as far as we can tell.

Maia doesn't wait to see what happened, slowly climbing upstairs to get back to her computer. She gets up there carefully, and sits on her bed again, starting the connection with Melinda, but hasn't completed it yet.

Away in Paradox Space, but not far...

An explosion shook the massive tree in which Byross's hive was perched. A series of colorful epithets that belonged to no unified culture escaped the agitated troll's lips as he ran to one of the windows, surveying the damage. The rock had struck a nearby tree, reducing it to spinters and ash. By the time the greenblood had returned to his computer, however...

UV has disconnected from server.

CFB: BYRROSS?
CFB: WHY am I talking to someone who can't RRESPOND?

Elsewhere, but with a much smaller gap between the two locales, Clerus's submersible shook as the shockwave of a meteor striking the ocean's surface nearby reached the craft.

CFB: OKAY, so now it's my turrn to have to deal with "celestial BODIES."
CFB: ...COME on, Byrross, rreconnect.
CMC: If you like, we can change the order and I can connect to you?
CFB: GIVE me a moment, I'll ask his neighborr if she knows what HAPPENED.

<Insert unimportant conversation with Somina>

CFB: OKAY, his hive's still therre, but his connection's apparrently DEAD.
CFB: I don't want to leave him out, but maybe we can pick him up LATERR.
CVS: That's a good idea.
CMC: Alright then.

Melinda cancelled the connection with Maia, and sent a connection offer to Clerus. The troll accepted, then backed away from his computer.

CFB: ALRRIGHT, give me a moment to clearr some RROOM.
CMC: WHAT THE SHIT AM I LOOKING AT?
CVS: ... Oooooh right I didn't tell you.
CFB: DIDN'T tell herr WHAT? THAT I live in a SUBMARRINE? SURRELY that's not -too- STRRANGE.
CVS: That you're an alien.
CMC: MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
CFB: AND as you said earrlierr, "to me, you'rre the ALIEN."
CFB: THIS is wherre I'd stick my tongue out at you in a gesturre of PETULANCE.
CVS: >_>
CMC: Sigh.
CMC: I don't suppose it really matters. This is a life or death situation.
CMC: Clear your space.

Unfortunately, there wasn't much space even available to be cleared. It was likely that Clerus would have to climb over one piece of equipment just to reach the next, excepting perhaps the totem lathe. Nevertheless, he splashed through the ankle-deep water in his submarine as he ran back to his quarters, figuring that was the best place to start. Leaving the door open between it and the engine room, he began tossing plastic crates filled with odds and ends into the engine room.

CFB: IF you feel it necessarry, you can lend a hand with the CURRSORR.
CFB: IT takes some getting used to, THOUGH.
CMC: I had best get some practice then, hadn't I?

With that she began carefully lifting and moving the crates with her own mouse. She's a little bit jerky.

CFB: BE carreful with that, I found that package of figurrines at the bottom of an oceanic TRRENCH!

The crate in question was... filled with "action figures" of varying natures. Some were metal, others plastic, and some were clearly more aligned with television shows aimed at wigglers, judging by the bright colors and exaggerated features.

Melinda giggled a little, putting it down. She mis-clicks with the next one and starts pulling at a section of the panelling.

...And Clerus is immediately bowled over by the wall of water that quickly floods his quarters, landing quite conveniently in his recuperacoon. Thank goodness his grubphone is waterproof.

CFB: OH god close IT!
CFB: CLOSE IT!

Melinda quickly dragged it back into place, gaping in shock.

CMC: My sincerest apologies. I will endeavor to be more careful in the future.
CFB: OKAY, I still hearr the engine, so everrything's FINE.
CFB: JUST... don't do that AGAIN.
CFB: ESPECIALLY considerring that this is the platforrm on which you'rre placing those DEVICES.
CFB: IF I suddenly don't have it anymorre, I'm out of LUCK.
CMC: Alright.

She continued helping to clear space, but the game's hamfisted and a bit glitchy, as is her computer, and though she tries to be careful it doesn't take long for her to accidentally rip one of the panels clean off.

She quickly puts down the cruxtruder as she tries to figure out how to replace it.

CMC: DAMNIT!

Now in water up to his chest (though the previously present water absorbs most of the actual force from this latest surge), Clerus growls, shaking his head.

CFB: NEVERRMIND, it's a lost CAUSE.
CFB: JUST build what you can while you CAN.
CFB: AND get me the hell out of HERRE.
CFB: I'LL deal with the crruxtrruderr MYSELF.

It is a testament to his capabilities as a swimmer that he is able to tread water while wearing heavy boots, baggy pants, and multiple shirts, not to mention with pockets stuffed with random items. Making his way over to cruxtruder, he withdraws his anchor from his strife deck. The thing is admittedly old, with spots of rust, but it is easily five feet in length, with another five feet of chain hanging from it. And immediately, Clerus begins to treat the lid of the cruxtruder with the same vigor that'd destroyed a certain bookcase.

The cap flies off, ejecting the kernel in the process.

CFB: ANY suggestions on what I should put in the seizurre KERRNEL?

Mel stared and shook her head, putting down the totem lathe and the alchemiter carefully.

CMC: Uh, the least-dangerous toy of yours perhaps?
CFB: I don't own any TOYS.
CMC: The things in the boxes then, if your ego is really that fragile.
CFB: I have a lot of BOXES.
CFB: ARRE you rreferring to those ARRTICULATED FIGURRINES?
CMC: Yes, yes, whatever you want to call them.
CFB: BUT it seems... unsporrtsmanlike to intentionally use the weakest potential DONORR.
CMC: Whatever you are, you're a hell of a lot stronger than a similarly-built human.
CMC: We humans aren't that strong.
CFB: TRRUTH be t0ld, neitherr arre m0st TRROLLS.
CFB: NOT brragging, it's just simply something that I have to deal WITH.
-- urbaneVagrant connected --
CUV: 'strue o'course i'll vouch for 'im on this'n
CUV: i'm jes' a tad more noodly than th' big lug
CMC: I see you've returned. My apologies for usurping your position but it seemed unwise to delay.
CMC: And again, unsportmanlike as it may be, if we must battle creatures themed to our donations to these kernels, then there is no choice but to do so with our survival in mind.
CVS: I don't feel so good.

Maia's sprawled on her bed and looking even paler than usual.

CVS: I think I need a nap.
CMC: No, no naps.
CUV: th' chickadee's right marm
CUV: never sleep when yeh've got a head wound
CUV: chances are yeh'll never wake up again
CVS: :S I really don't feel good.
CMC: Then we should hurry. UV, is there any way to transfer from one world to another, besides the initial transfer?
CMC: And FB, the card.

The card hovers just over his head. It's probably for the best that MC kept it out of the water, so we'd assume. Or maybe they're waterproof due to their nature, but we'll ignore that potential for now. Grabbing the card, as well as generating and absconding with a cruxite dowel, Clerus begins to make his way toward the totem lathe. Going through the proper motions, even as additional leaks begin to erode the structural integrity of his home, Clerus maintains a level head.

Shortly, he has in his grasp... a cube. Or rather, a rubix cube, each square colored, to his eyes, red. Never you mind that the colors are orange, red, and purple in this case, and that his server can see that quite clearly.

FB: WHAT is this THING?
FB: SOME kind of box, but it has no OPENINGS.
MC: It's a rubix cube, a kind of toy. I think you should worry about putting something in the ball before you try to solve it.
FB: OH, rright, seizurre KERRNEL.
MC: Indeed. Please do keep the difficulty level in mind when selecting it...

He scans the rapidly flooding submarine as his belongings begin to drift willy-nilly around. A thoughtful look comes across the troll's face. Not once has he even thought of taking a look at the remaining time on the countdown. The first item to come to mind is an old set of clothing he had worn when a foot shorter and a good six inches less broad. It's reminiscent of an old naval uniform, but with the usual accoutrements of Alternian aristocracy attached to it - which is to say jewelry. Surely something this impractical wouldn't make things difficult. Grabbing the ensemble, Clerus shoves it into the kernel. The resulting sprite is an icon of a swarthy old sailor, complete with pipe. ...Okay, maybe the pipe was still in the pocket during the prototyping.

Then Clerus turned back to the Cruxite Cube.

FB: OKAY, when you say "solve it," what arre you talking ABOUT?
MC: Uh... There's three colors, it's not that hard to solve it dude.
FB: ...HOW much time do I HAVE?
MC: Uhm... 5:29
FB: CHUMBUCKETS.

Sadly, all Clerus can do is fumble about with the Cruxite Cube, hoping for things to match up.

Melinda began to try and give him directions.

Unfortunately, this is only met with a good five minutes of frustration with the accursed device, as it's rather difficult to follow directions based on color when you can't differentiate. Some may say the typist plays this particular weakness of the character a little too hard. Some can also go shove their head in a toilet for all the typist cares. With but a handful of seconds left, and no closer to solving the puzzle than when he'd started, the troll's patience snapped abruptly, and he crushed the puzzle between his hands.

And then he disconnected. The meteor that had accounted for what amounted to a trajectory sank harmlessly through the water. Well, harmlessly to Clerus, but not to the poor troll who's hive he'd been slowly sinking toward.

The water rushed out of the submarine as he regained his bearings, immediately reconnecting to the others.

FB: THAT was unbelievably INANE.
MC: That was quite disturbing. I suspect it is now my turn?
UV: 'swhat i figure marm
UV: promise t'be gentle c|;P
MC: That somehow isn't entirely as reassuring as it was likely intended to be.
VS: :/
UV: ahahahah well glad that yeh're savvy
UV: well what're y'waitin' fer connect an' we'll get this party underway
MC: And that was even less reassuring.

Despite her misgivings, Melinda opened up her end of the connection.

And was immediately greeted by Byross's attempts at juggling the crystal balls. Oddly enough, he was rather proficient... until he was distracted. One landed harmlessly in an easy chair, but the other wound up smashing against the floor, and the other flew out into the hallway.

UV: y'dress positively oldschool marm
UV: hahah charming i s'pose

Melinda let out a little shriek as the one that landed on the floor smashed in a spectacular starburst, light pouring out like something had been prototyped. Mel ducks under her shawl, though something keeps the spray from hitting her. She pants and shakes for a moment, slowly lowering the shawl.

MC: Don't do that!
MC: You'll upset them and I'll be all but useless.
UV: y'gonna be more specific or'm i gonna hafta find out who this nebulous 'them' is
UV: o gods this computer ahahahahahahah
UV: i've seen vintage but this
UV: this jes' takes th'rainbow spewin' cake c|;D

Byross begins looking around at the various decorations around the room, apparently having forgotten his purpose in playing his game entirely. Naturally, he feels compelled to toy with the bells, shaking them about before letting them just drop to the floor.

Melinda gasps, covering her ears. Things seem to flicker on the screen, the noise waking things.

MC: Stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it
MC: The ghosts
UV: y'got a ghost problem
UV: oughtta call someone 'bout that
UV: but who
MC: I'm the person who gets called you reprehensible gnat-attentioned child.
MC: And the only thing holding my mind intact is the silence and the crystals in here.
MC: Every disturbance you make and every crystal you break is another barrier of mine down and a touch closer to insanity.
UV: oh marm th'thing y'gotta realize first an' foremost 'bout everyone
UV: izzat ye're all shithive maggots
UV: no exceptions
MC: Unless you want me even worse you need to refrain from breaking anything made of glass or crystal and ringing the bells. They're there for a very specific purpose and you could ruin everything.
UV: so ye're sayin' everything else is fair game
MC: No I am not. The more disturbances you cause the more disturbances they're going to cause and the less I'm going to be able to do to keep them from ripping me apart.
UV: tch so melodramatic
UV: fine i'll stop fiddlin' around

True to his word (by his standards, he was actually behaving), Byross immediately deployed the cruxtruder in the middle of the room, wasting no time in following suit with the totem lathe and alchemizer.

UV: y'happy
MC: Thank you.

Melinda studies the cruxtruder, then shakes her head.

MC: I can't get this open.
UV: but y'dun' want me t'make any noise marm c|;P
MC: We may have to reach a compromise here, as I cannot possibly remove the lid on my own.
UV: i'll take that as summat th'flavor o' consent

Without waiting for further affirmation, the first thing to rise into the air... was one of the more solid-looking chairs in the room, which was immediately used as a bludgeoning tool on the cruxtruder. We'll never figure out exactly why hitting something makes it up, but that seems to be the way of things.

Melinda covers up with the shawl again, though she ends up seated with her hands clamped over her ears and breathing way too fast.

UV: th'dirty deed is done
UV: y'may now stop shakin' like a newborn woofbeast
MC: Of course. The card?

She's still shaking, but seems to have sucked it up regardless. The card was immediately deployed on the floor in front of Melinda, a wide grin on Byross's face as he watched the human's antics. She takes it, stuffing it into the totem lathe on her way to get a cruxite dowel. She gets that and goes through the typical proccess, but stops before she gets the item.

MC: Hrm.
UV: gettin' ahead o' yerself
MC: Precisely.
UV: jes' toss one o'yer shinies in that oughtta be fine
MC: One of the bells, maybe.

With that she carefully grasps one and tosses it in.

UV: far be it from me t'point out that th'bells will start poppin' up all over now
UV: guess yeh'll have t'learn t'make yer own quiet
MC: Lovely.

She sighed softly, and shook her head, then activated the alchemiter. A scaffolding raises, before a large green crystal chandelier is hanging from her ceiling and the scaffolding disappears.

MC: Son of a bitch.
UV: i'll give ya two guesses as t'what y'hafta do with it
MC: Gonna have to climb her. Kindly look away from your computer for a few minutes.
UV: what y'worried that yeh'll get engaged in embarrassing acrobatics marm c|;p
MC: Not exactly, I'm far more worried about the skirt.
UV: tch now i oughtta be offended
UV: takin' me fer a perv

Never you mind that he most definitely is.

MC: Nonetheless, your word of honor you shan't watch.
UV: hahahahahahah
UV: a'ight
UV: cross m'vascular system an' hope t'die
UV: stick a needle in th' ol' ocular globes
UV: won't take a peek no matter m' desire t' observe yer pale alien anatomy

Melinda's cheeks flushed dark red and she squeaked.

MC: Look away then.

In the interest of feigning actually looking away, Byross refrained from answering the message.

Melinda took it as an agreement, and quickly stripped the bulky skirt off, pulling on a clean pair of pants from her sylladex. She then immediately drops her shawl and grabs onto the lower crystals of the chandelier.

The usual mischevious grin curled Byross's lips. He waited an appropriate duration of time before finally messaging Melinda again.

UV: safe t'look back yet
UV: is yer innocence properly secured b'hind satin walls once more
MC: Currently hanging from it
UV: satin walls or summat else
UV: can y'really hang from yer innocence though
MC: busy

She struggled up it, grumbling and growling under her breath, until she finally gets herself up to the top.

MC: No the chandelier
UV: hah didja figure out what ye're s'posed t'do yet
UV: i'd love t'hear th'processes yeh've devoted t'the deciphering of this little riddle
MC: :| Given breaking it worked the last time I'm guessing that's what I'll have to do.
MC: How long do I have?
UV: hrmmmm well
UV: after yer little display there flailin' about tryin' to get up there in th'first place
UV: y'really oughtta work on yer jumping skills marm
UV: that aside
UV: i'd put'cha 'round ohhhhhh
UV: 1.14 soon as I hit enter
UV: no pressure
MC: Lovely.

Melinda struggled to her feet, clinging to the chain and wobbling. "Fuck fuck fucking fuck..." She kicked at it, sending a shiver through the crystals.

Something coalsesces under it, looking like a fog almost.

UV: gotta do better'n that mate
UV: say what's that dealio beneath
UV: mebbe jes' a tad bit more motivation t'get th'hell outta there
UV: ahahahah harder c'mon you can do it
MC: Not! Helping!!

She stomped harder, shrieking a little and clinging harder to the chain. "Oh, shit, oh, shit."

UV: jump
UV: dun' jes' stomp
UV: give it yer all

She frowned at that, but finally sighed and closed her eyes, jumping hard. It creaks and groans but she looses her footing and drops, barely clinging to it.

UV: gods ye're hopeless
UV: fine i'll give you a hand

First, Byross placed a chair beneath her, in case she should lose her grip. After that, he started placing books atop the chandelier, adding more weight to strain it. Granted, her state of barely hanging on would make it difficult for her to read his messages, and so he refrained from providing her with further instruction for the moment.

What the hell was he doing-? She starts trying to get up, when there's an abrupt creak and she manages to fall, shrieking.

For using a computer to do this, his reflexes could've been counted as impressive, as the chair he'd placed beneath Melinda was immediately picked up and brought to her, reducing the fall distance. Granted, once she was on top of it securely, the game didn't allow him to further control the chair, and so it had a small drop of its own, snapping the legs.

She curled up with a shriek of her own, shuddering and hugging herself as she was transported, losing connection.

Byross frowned at the screen for a moment, waiting for the connection to resume. Hopefully, the difficulties were on Melinda's end and not his - he'd already been having the issues with his connection earlier, and would find it most unfortunate if he wound up excluded simply by virtue of a crappy ISP. But, deciding that saving his own skin was more important than touching base with Melinda, he wound up relying on standard communication techniques.

UV: hey other chick y'still there
UV: i'd hate fer yeh t'ferget me up here
UV: with whatever shitty nonsense ye're involved in
VS: oh hey sorry
VS: not feeling that great :c
VS: open up your end, I'm waiting.

If there was one thing he didn't much care for, it was being required to follow the instructions of others. However, for the sake of making this happen without incident, Byross complied in a punctual fashion.

UV: there y'go
UV: if'n y'see a gray room with a lotta cans an' bottles around
UV: y'should be all spiffy an' ready t'go
VS: hokay i see you.

Maia fiddled with the mouse, picking up one of the cans and accidentally-on-purpose throwing it at Byross's head. As trajectory and crazy random happenstance would have it, the can impaled itself on the troll's horn, at which point he casually removed the monocle from his eye and cast a discerning glance at the offending object.

UV: well now ain't it fortunate that those damned things're still there
UV: when i've thought about gettin' rid of 'em fer sweeps

Maia giggled, still dizzy and icky feeling. Outside her box-bed, something creeps - something black, with a curly blonde wig and pale pink dress, and a pipe clenched in its' mouth.

VS: Sorry XD
VS: Uh, you might wanna clear some space dude.
UV: jes' toss th' dead soldiers t'the side i dun' need 'em
UV: an' that table with th' board games can go
UV: dun' break the sewing machine though i need that
VS: dead soldiers?? I don't see any bodies? Oo
VS: Not that that's not a relief but uh
VS: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?
UV: i'd say sorry but it's not my fault y'can't wrap yer thinkpan 'round my vernacular
UV: empties marm
UV: cans an' bottles an' th'like
UV: jes' make sure it's not th' full ones ye're tossin' around
VS: oh okay
-- monochromeCelebration restablished connection --
MC: Do not expect her to recall that...
VS: Love you too >_>

Maia carefully lifted the table, using it to clear a space and calmly dropping it to one side... unfortunately it's now in front of the full bottles and cans. She ignores this though, and fiddles around until she figures out how to deploy the machines.

As Maia moved the cans, Byross decided to save what few items he thought might be of particular value from her fumbling wrath. The horn of mind honey mead was the first to enter his sylladex, and was immediately sorted into the minor importance category of his dramatic hero modus. This was followed by a flask of whiskey, a spare hat, and a deck of playing cards. We're not entirely sure why he deemed it necessary to recover that last one.

UV: alright well i'm not a big friggin' apebeast like clerus so y'gotta help me with th' cap on th' cruxtruder
UV: personal recommendation would be prolly th' fridge right there
UV: or i guess mebbe y'call it a thermal hull i dun' know what yeh prefer t'refer to 'em as
VS: uh it's a fridge oO

Maia picked it up, dropping it on the Cruxtruder by accident. She's not fast enough to avoid toppling it.

Numerous contents spilled out of the fridge, though most of them beverages in nature. Whether it was a few liters of faygo or several bottles of licquor, or even a few cases of soda... alcohol... well, it was a variety, okay? Dude likes his liquid fuel! And a lone sandwich, crushed beneath one of the cases, slowly oozed mustard onto the floor.

UV: well i've seen worse
UV: 'least y'got the job done

Byross sauntered (indeed, sauntered, as he knew that he did, in fact, have an audience, and could maintain such a method of locomotion in spite of having more than his fair shair of the firewater that evening. Even the typist is unsure of how long the greenblood had been awake, though, as his erratic sleeping pattern didn't lend itself well to figuring out if the generally irresponsible troll was drinking before his version of "noon". (He was.)

Oh, right. The sauntering. It was directed over toward the cruxtruder, where he deftly generated a cruxite dowel. We're going to assume for now that Maia also managed to place the prepunched card, which Byross retrieved and processed in the totem lathe.

Actually Maia had waited, and as per her sense of humor placed it on Byross's hat.

Tch, alright, fine. The card, being in Byross's hat, was the source of the greenblood's need to toss a questioning, borderline disdainful look in the camera's general direction. Yes, he did in fact have a good idea of where the viewport was angled.

UV: really now
VS: Hehehehehe
MC: Serves you right.
UV: tch you can't even see what's goin' on mc so dun' give me any o' yer human lip
UV: 'less it's t'plant summat of a sloppy kiss on my magnanimous posterior
MC: Not into rimming, thanks.
VS: |oOo|...
VS: brb fainting
MC: Sigh.
FB: COULD I get an EXPLANATION?
UV: no clerus
UV: fer th'sake o'yer virgin ears
UV: y'oughtta avoid that topic
FB: WAIT, is it rreelly something rrelated to THAT?
UV: well y'could always grubble it if'n ye're that curious
FB: I think I'll just believe you and trry to block it frrom my THINKPAN.
VS: GOOD idea FB, good idea.
MC: Hey you're not the one with creepers asking if they can. Ew.
VS: ... Shit there's something outside my bed.
MC: Lock the door then spazzette.
FB: well speakin' o' spazzes
FB: got any requests fer th'seizure kernel or should i jes' toss in say
FB: th'bottle o' black liquid sorrow brew what i haven't dared t'touch since th'last time
FB: figure i'll opt out o' th'cholerbearskin rug if'n ye're tryin' t'make this easy on us
MC: Wise choice. Yes, leaving our enemies intoxicated would be an excellent idea.
VS: Unless they're proficient in drunken boxing.
MC: Don't jinx it.

The bottle in question was... something of a behemoth. It had previously lain against the fridge, but rolled free when the device in question had been uprooted. As Byross pulled it upright, Maia might notice that, for what was just supposed to be a beverage bottle, it certainly did a good job of coming up to the troll's chest. There was no label, but the bottle itself was completely black, and seemed to glisten malevolently in the glow of the fire that was raging outside the window. There was no label to speak of - Byross had created this monstrosity himself.

VS: Nine hells
VS: Is that tar or some shit?
UV: marm this is th' most potent drink i've ever had th'misfortune t'concoct
UV: strong enough t'put down a behemoth fer a few hours if'n i'm not mistaken
UV: which i could be as i'm not exactly much of a zoologist but i digress from th'original point
UV: i'll be glad t'see this thing gone
UV: prolly volatile as hell an' woulda exploded if'n the fire had gotten this far

The troll wasn't kidding when he said that Clerus was the one with a powerful physique - while Byross was by no means a slouch in the terms of physical capability, his rested far more in the agility and endurance department than raw brute force. As such, it took some... finagling to get that bottle in the air and directed toward the seizure kernel, which seemed oblivious to the proceedings.

VS: Put it down, I can pick it up, remember?
UV: thought yeh'd never volunteer marm c|;p

Figuring that his display of... uhh, physical prowess had been enough, Byross immediately set down the bottle, complying with Maia's wishes. Honestly, that's what he'd been trying to do, just without words.

Maia lifted it easily, managing to push it into the kernel without a problem. Thank goodness!

Was... was that lightning that just struck outside? Did the wind rushing by the treetops sound an awful lot like mad cackling? The sprite turned as black as the malevolent beverage, depicting simply a floating bottle with a stark white jolly roger plastered upon where a label would normally be located.

With the sprite prototyped, Byross was left to fiddle with the totem lathe and prepunched card, the latter of which he retrieved from his hat. It had actually been fortuitous for it to be there instead of potentially being captchalogued - surely such an item would've wound up in the Plot Device category and would've led to unnecessary suspense in regards to yanking it from his sylladex.

But when he finally got around to placing the carved totem on the alchemiter, Byross got the nasty surprise of being met by a glistening gray-green, strangely familiar figure. Maia may not have understood precisely what was going on, but when the cruxite troll drew his sword, Byross had a sick feeling in his gut.

Fangs were bared in a silent cry as the artificial Nagato, the one troll Byross had ever managed to wind up close to, charged the marksman. Byross ducked the first swing, stumbling over discarded cans in the process. Melee combat had never been the greenblood's forte, and Nagato wasn't giving him any time to recover to so much as withdraw his rifle or shotgun.

Bottles that had sat on the shelves in front of windows were neatly bisected as Byross fled the cruxite construct, water spilling out of them and cascading onto the floor. Eventually, though, necessity and survival instinct overcame the greenblood's horror, and with what first looked like a drunken lurch, but was actually a carefully executed maneuver, wound up tripping Nagato, sending him sprawling. A look of pure hate was etched on the monochromatic features as Byross's shotgun was brought to bear.

A single drop of fluid rolled down the troll's cheek in regret. It had been seven sweeps since he'd seen the bastard; this was one hell of a reunion. And then he pulled the trigger, which ultimately severed his connection for a brief moment.

Maia waited for him to come back online, sending him a brief message when he did.

-- violaceousSadogue [VS] began pestering urbaneVagrant [UV] --
VS: Hey, uh, I don't know who that was but... I'm sorry.
VS: That looked like heavy shit dude.
UV: well marm i'd appreciate it if'n y'didn't bring it up with anyone else
UV: yer summation of th' situation is pretty apt
UV: though that's th'first i've been attacked in my hive in a while
UV: much prefer it out on my own terms without th'surprise nonsense
UV: an' i'm gonna start rambling if'n i don't cut m'self off here
VS: Understandable. I won't bring it up, but I hear I'm a good listener.

Something throws itself against the doors to her bed, and Maia lets out a startled shriek, flipping back to the memo.

CVS: I AM IN NO CONDITION TO FIGHT RIGHT NOW. SOMEBODY FUCKING HELP!
CFB: AS you WISH!

Clerus took a moment to look away from his own soggy, aromatic dilemma to return to helping Maia deal with the aggressors in her hive. Home. Thing. Strange words, but he'd figure them out eventually. His weapon of choice to unleash indiscriminate justice upon the perpetrators of unwarranted malice? The hapless woman's dresser. A borderline evil grin crept across the troll's face as he bludgeoned a trio of imps with the human's furniture. While not as visceral as personal combat, there was something... satisfying about killing something in this fashion.

Though those objects dropping on the ground as the monsters met their untimely demise were a little odd.

Maia waits for word from Clerus that the coast is clear, huddling in one side of the box-bed built into the wall of her room. It's actually in the inner wall, leaving it even warmer than it would normally be!

Before taking a moment to inform Maia of her newfound freedom, Clerus carefully set down the dresser, intent upon destroying as little of the human's hive- home. Yes, damnit, he'd stop reflexively referring to it as a hive eventually. At any rate, he was intent upon destroying as little of the human's house as possible. Or, for that matter, any other important items. For now, he placed it in front of the door to prevent more intruders from trying to take advantage of Maia's state of injury.

FB: I believe that accounts forr all of THEM.
FB: YOU should be safe, forr the MOMENT.
FB: THOUGH I suppose I should experriment with the building featurres and trry to forrtify the arrea forr YOU.
VS: Prolly
VS: Thank you! <3
FB: I uhh, well, errrr, you'rre WELCOME!

Without stopping to think that that's probably a bit obscene to trolls, Maia carefully climbs out of the boxbed and curiously pokes at one of the objects.

+1 INKDROP
+5 BUILDGRIST
+105 EXPERIENCE POINTS

Maia's level remains at Spinprentence.

FB: THOSE things you just picked up arre apparrently some kind of CURRRRENCY.
FB: THE grrist was alrready in the pherrnalia rregistrry, but that inkdrrop is a new ONE.

In the interest of keeping Maia secure for the moment, he replaced her window with a wall, and began to place another layer of wall directly next to the existing ones. Naturally, this was beginning to eat through the grist reservoir reasonably quickly, but he felt it was the best course of action.

VS: Woah. Cool beans.
FB: I believe this should be enough forr the time BEING.
FB: IF you rrequirre my assistance again, don't hesitate to ASK!
VS: Of course. :)
MC: Well then, Maia dear, what do we do now?
VS: Uh... consult with the seizure ball thing, which should have matured now.
UV: kernelsprite if'n you gotta know th'proper nomenclature
UV: but seizuresprite works too sounds more fun anyway
UV: for those what haven't done it yet now's th'time t'prototype a second item
UV: an' fewer restrictions on what it is b'cause it won't affect what we're dealin' with
UV: jes' gives yer sprite more flavor at this point
VS: Hm. All right, mister wellspring of random trivia, since it looks like a ghost can it go through walls?
UV: hah well that'n i'm not so sure about
UV: oughtta ask yer ectobiologist there
UV: or mebbe what'chacallit
UV: th'word fer someone what studies th'ancient cultures an' whatnot
UV: ectowhateverthehellthatis
UV: ectoanthropologist
UV: there we go that oughtta work
UV: though if'n y'study th' anatomy of th'spooks i'd say th' biologist version is jes' as apt
MC: ... WHY would I study ghost anatomy?
VS: And on that EEEK

As, indeed, it appears sprites can pass through walls. Grandollysprite floats in. He's a leisurely-looking dude wearing a frilly dress and a banana-curled wig. Maia gapes.

|SPRITELOG|
MAIA: Um... Granddad?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Yes, dear!

MAIA: Jeeze, you scared the cra- heck out of me!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Tee hee hee!

MAIA: That's creepy granddad.

MAIA: Anyway, are you REALLY my dead granddad?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Of course, Maia! I have come back to help you on your journey
through The Medium and beyond! I am delighted to see what a fine young woman you have turned out to be. Just like your mother!

MAIA: Okay, I guess I'll have to take your word for it. I really miss you, and I know mom does too..

MAIA: Hey speaking of which, do you know where she is??? I looked everywhere for her!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Your mother was kidnapped!

MAIA: Oh no!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: When you crossed over to The Medium, she was apprehended by the very forces of darkness which your presence here has awakened.

MAIA: What? Okay, so what is the medium you're talking about?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: It is where we are now! A realm that is a ring of pure void, dividing light and darkness. It turns in the thick of The Incipisphere, a place untouched by the flow of time in your universe.

MAIA: You mean we got transported into the computer?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: A computer? Why, what is that, dear? Some new fangled contraption, like the horseless auto-boxcar?

MAIA: Granddad you built my computer desk. I know you know what one is.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Tee hee hee! Of course I know what a computer is, Maia! I was just pulling your leg!

MAIA: Ah, okay then.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: No, Maia. You are not inside a computer or software or anything like that! Try not to be so linear, dear. The software that brought you here was merely a  mechanism that served as a gateway! Its routines in a way served to invoke this realm's instance, yet it stands independently of any physical machine, and somewhat paradoxically, always has!

MAIA: I think that went right over my head but whatever.

MAIA: What are we actually doing here? I was told I was just beta-testing this game.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: I think it would be best if we started with the big picture!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Above The Medium, beyond The Seven Gates, residing at the core of The Incipisphere is a place known as Skaia.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Legend holds that Skaia exists as a dormant crucible of unlimited creative potential. What does this mean, you ask? I'm afraid my lips are sealed about that, dear! Tee hee!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: But needless to say, where a realm of such profound importance is concerned, forces of light will forever be charged with its defense, while forces of darkness will just as persistently covet its destruction!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: And as it so happens, at the center of this realm whose fate is in question, these very forces duel on a stage, stuck in eternal stalemate.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Yes, they have dueled in this manner forever... that is, until you showed up!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Yes, you, Maia!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Before your Prototyping with my ashes, you may recall the Sprite's previous incarnation, which resulted from its Kernel's "hatching".

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: You see, this hatching occurs automatically in response to your arrival! The result is a pair of Kernels, one dark, one light, each carrying the information they were prototyped with before the hatch!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: One goes down, to a  kingdom entrenched in darkness. The other, up, to a kingdom basking in light! Each comes to rest in an Orb atop a Spire, of which there are three others in kind. The Four Spires are situated above a throne, and these two thrones preside over the two respective Sovereign Powers!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: And once the Kernels are situated, that is when the game is afoot. The true war begins, light versus dark, good versus evil.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: This is a war that the forces of light are always destined to lose, without exception!

MAIA: What? What are we even doing then? And we're already all in this medium anyways!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: That remains for you to find out, dear! For you see, the journey you are about to take is The Ultimate Riddle!

MAIA: What? You completely ignored the rest of what I just said!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: For now, your objective is to proceed towards Skaia, and pass through The First Gate situated directly above your house, not even terribly far! The Gates  will become progressively more difficult to reach, so you had better be prepared to sharpen your adventuring skills!

MAIA: Aaaaaugh fine. How am I supposed to get up there, especially with a concussion?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: You build! As for your concussion, we can take care of that in just a few moments dear.

MAIA: Okay...

MAIA: So this battle of light and dark is basically irrelevant? I dunno, that seems kinda odd... but I guess I should rescue my mom when I'm feeling better.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Yes, Maia!

MAIA: And then after that, we solve this ultimate riddle thing and save Earth whatever the troll planet is from destruction!!!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Oh no, I'm afraid not!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Your planets are done for, dear! There is nothing you can do about that!

MAIA: WHAT?!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Your purpose is so much more important than saving those silly old planets, though!

MAIA: And that is?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: TEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Maia, you are such a good girl! I know you will succeed.

MAIA: Uh, thanks, granddad.

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: You are a good girl, and good girls deserve treats!

MAIA: Yay?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: I am going to give you a very special gift Maia. Use these wisely.

MAIA: ...?!

The purple granddad-doll ghost thing beamed a small plastic bag into Maia's hands. She carefully opens it and pulls an object out.

MAIA: Are these hard candies...?

GRANDOLLYSPRITE: Yes, Maia! You should eat them to keep your strength up.

Maia raised an eyebrow but popped one into her mouth, sucking for a moment before crunching happily. Her head feels much better and some color seems to come back to her skin.

CFB: THAT was something of a long CONVERRSATION.
CFB: ANYTHING parrticularrly imporrtant, orr just some catching up with whateverr that thing WAS?
CVS: It was... very educational! :D
CVS: Kind of sad though. Here, let me type up a transcription...
-- CVS posted file grandad-explanation.txt --
CFB: SO... we just destrroyed two worrlds with one GAME?
CUV: dun' be so pedestrian mate it's likely jes' a temporal inevitability what knocked th'planets around in th'first place
CUV: an' by likely i mean a certainty
CUV: so dun' get yer conscience in a bunch
CUV: not that you glubgrubs're known fer havin' one
CFB: WELL, eitherr way, it seems like an awful lot to BRREAK.
CUV: well thus far seems t'be th'theme of yer place in this group don't it
CFB: I'LL have you know that I have excellent CONTRROL!
CUV: whatever mate jes' help th' chickadee out while i try t'keep th'blighters offa th' ghost lady
CUV: what we got here's a case of a couple o' notquite aristocratic individuals in varyin' states o' dismay an' potential danger
CUV: so you deal with it yer way an' i'll deal with it mine
CFB: ...ALRRIGHT.
CVS: ._.
CVS: Wow these things really cleared my head.
CVS: Did anyone else hear a weird voice right when they entered the medium say something like "The keeper of time has entered the land of glow and festivities"????
CMC: I heard something similar, yes.
CMC: "The host of stars has entered the land of flowers and frogs"
CFB: SOMETHING about the page of SPACE. I didn't catch if therre was a secont parrt, THOUGH.
CFB: BUT when you say "land of suchandsuch," arre you being quite LITERRAL?
CFB: BECAUSE the waterr herre is a little STRRANGE. FORR that matterr, the only geogrraphical featurre worrth noting is a serries of overrsized pale RROCKS.
CVS: Well when I looked outside it looked like there was a rave going on...
CMC: Outside my house there appears to be an endless garden and many frogs, yes.
CUV: steam an' dismay
CUV: 'swhat i got
CUV: an' when i say steam i'm sayin' random geysers outta nowhere
CUV: but also like some huge kinda pipe network all brass an' shinylike
CUV: an' there's summat millin' around down there
CUV: runnin' screaming from th' steam
CUV: hahaha it's actually pretty funny
CVS: Yours sounds like fun UV. Got any other nuggets of wisdom?

Maia considered carefully and munched another of the candies.

CUV: newp this is as far as it went ladies an' gentletr0ll
CUV: but be prepared o' more of those little blighters what were after vs
CVS: Oh lovely.
CMC: Is that what has been making such a ruckus?
CUV: ye're gunna hafta define ruckus marm
CUV: seein' as there's no audio t'this shebang

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