Inchling Investigations

[15:07:04] <~GMShifty> Emi sinks low into the discarded catcher's mitt she uses as a chair. Wrapped into a fuzzy blanket, she breathes softly, asleep. A large open book sits before her.
[15:10:36] <Miura> Miura may not even be sure that Emi is asleep or not. It's hard to tell the difference between drowsily reading or drowsily sleeping sometimes! Either way, she's looking out the window...waiting for something to happen. She still calls this 'preperation'.
[15:11:11] <Miura> ...Still though. The snakes aren't making a fuss. This is fine!
[15:13:30] <Azuno> the door bursts open, with a tiny galant inchling striding inside, "Emi! Miura! Itsuki!"
[15:14:47] <~GMShifty> Emi meeps, sinking slower into the fuzziness. Only the mess of her pink hair lingers above the sea of blanket.
[15:15:56] <Azuno> "What has happened? the village is filled with zombies and you are sitting around doing nothing!" The little inchling with unusual curls of hair trots in and stands in front of Emi, finding her the easier target.
[15:16:35] <Miura> G--ggh! She...she was looking too high up! Miura's water bottle literally-a-cap nearly falls off! "Don't they always just lumber around, though?"
[15:16:38] <~GMShifty> Emi slumbers away, oblivious.
[15:17:25] <Azuno> Emi's glove chair gets shooken roughly, "This one attacked me! which means its attacking villagers, obviously!"
[15:19:40] <Miura> "...Oh. Rise and shine, Emi~!" She joins in the attempted rousal of Emi. Shake shake.
[15:19:43] <~GMShifty> *snrkt* Emi grabs a pillow from behind her head, and presses it over her face to muffle the noise.
[15:20:43] <Miura> "We have to prevent a zombie apocalypse!" This sounds new, and hip! More exciting! This is up her alley! "...I'll get supplies~" Miura runs off to literally just get water.
[15:22:36] <~GMShifty> Emi presses the pillow into her face, weak gasps for air can be heard.
[15:24:38] <Azuno> Azuno grabs the pillow, pulling it away, "You lazy...! You should be happy you have your job to do!"
[15:25:30] <~GMShifty> Emi fights Azuno for the pillow.
[15:26:31] <Azuno> Azuno smacks emi with the pillow, using roughhousing to get her way.
[15:27:01] <~GMShifty> Emi yanks hard back on the pillow, smacking herself in the face. Hard. "Uwaaaahhh!"
[15:27:15] <Azuno> "Good, you are awake now!"
[15:27:44] <~GMShifty> "You hit me!" Emi stares blearily through tears.
[15:29:46] <Azuno> "No time for that! Your gracious and lovely cousin has come to help you help the village!"
[15:30:18] <~GMShifty> "Ehhh? Azuno-chan?" Emi fumbles about for her glasses on the nightstand, still blind as ever.
[15:30:49] <Azuno> "Thaaats me!" Azuno lets out an ohoho laugh
[15:31:12] <Miura> Miura comes back with small containers of water! "One for everyone~!" And proceeds to hand out drinks~
[15:31:45] <Azuno> "Oh. thank you." Azuno takes the water and drinks it.
[15:32:26] <~GMShifty> Emi grabs hold of her glasses and fits them on her face, wobbily she climbs from hair chair, stumbling back and forth. "Miura~ make your onee-chan breakfast~"
[15:34:38] <Miura> "...Fiiiiiiiine." Normally someone Itsuki handles the cooking...but allllrrriiiiggghhhttttttt, iiiffff yooouuu saaaayyy ssooooooo.
[15:34:47] * Miura gets on that. Rice balls or something, that seems right.
[15:35:10] * Pengu ([email protected]) has joined #gensokyo
[15:35:10] * UboaServ sets mode: +o Pengu
[15:35:30] <~GMShifty> Emi plops herself down next to the table, resting her chin on it.
[15:36:31] <Azuno> "Where is Itsuki?"
[15:37:32] <Miura> "With her snakes. ...Somewhere. I guess." Frankly she's just happy they're not here. Food easier to think about when you aren't it.
[15:37:42] <~GMShifty> Emi murmurs, "She said something *yawn* last night about herding the snakes outside the village."
[15:38:21] <Azuno> "A noble endeavor, but you should really be focused on getting rid of these zombies!"
[15:39:15] <~GMShifty> "Im not a zombie," Emi rubs her eyes, "I was just up late last night reading."
[15:39:42] <Azuno> "No! i mean the human-sized ones outside!"
[15:39:44] <Miura> "You're a zombie in spirit every time you wake up!"
[15:39:57] <Miura> "You just don't attack people and then eat them."
[15:40:18] <Miura> "Or just lightly snack on the brains and make more zombies instead."
[15:40:25] <~GMShifty> "Maybe if you two wouldn't try and wake me up..."
[15:41:03] <Miura> "Dunno which these are but it's probably bad!" She ignores the statement entirely, coming back with some prepared rice balls, some for everyone. "This'll do!"
[15:41:06] * Miura hands them out~!
[15:41:21] <~GMShifty> Emi muches away, life slowly returning to her.
[15:41:32] <~GMShifty> munches*
[15:43:04] <Azuno> "So how long has this been going on?"
[15:43:37] <Miura> "How long have people been walking around like zombies..." ...She's not sure, honestly.
[15:45:47] <~GMShifty> "Mmm..." *Munch, munch* "I have been sensing weird magic in the village, like when the sun went all funny."
[15:45:59] <Miura> "So, a while then!"
[15:45:59] <~GMShifty> "It's been getting worse for a few weeks." *munch, munch*
[15:46:07] <Miura> "...Apparently."
[15:46:18] <Azuno> Azuno slams her hands on the table, "And WHY, pray tell, ahven't you protected the village from it!"
[15:46:31] <Miura> She gives Emi a look for a minute, then takes a drink. Well, OK, that was happening.
[15:47:29] <~GMShifty> "Theres always weird magic in the village." Emi smoothes out her hair, "We'd be chasing after that one witch cosntantly if we ran off after every source."
[15:48:11] <Miura> "We saved a shrine from being invaded by youkai earlier! We haven't been slacking off!"
[15:48:55] <~GMShifty> "And drove off some shadow people." Emi raises her finger, matter-of-factly.
[15:49:43] <Azuno> "Hrm...alright then. if that's the case, then you should have no problem driving off this newest threat!"
[15:50:16] <~GMShifty> Emi tries to protest for a moment, with a huff, she hops to her feet and retrieves her spellbook.
[15:51:18] <Miura> "Our mission is to protect the people! So a zombie outbreak just won't do!"
[15:51:29] <Miura> "...So we aim for the heads, right? I think that's how it goes."
[15:51:39] <Miura> "...Those are kinda up, though..."
[15:52:05] <~GMShifty> Emi bonks Miura on the head with a tiny fist. "They're still villagers, Miura."
[15:52:37] <Miura> "R-right!" Right. Yeah. "...So, uh, how are gonna go about this."
[15:52:45] <Miura> "...So...what do we shoot."
[15:53:41] <~GMShifty> "Let me get close so I can at least examine them. Afterall, I am the brains of this operation." Emi puffs up her chest and upturns her nose.
[15:54:48] <Miura> "So if it turns out they're zombies, we shoot you?"
[15:54:55] <Miura> "Sounds good!"
[15:55:47] <Azuno> "That will work!" Azuno claps her hands together! "Now lets go purify some zombies!"
[15:56:13] <~GMShifty> Emi pinches her younger sister's cheek.
[15:56:55] <Miura> "Uuuu~" Play on that little sister charm. Surely, that will save her.
[15:57:10] <~GMShifty> Emi pinches both at the same time.
[15:58:13] <Miura> "Uuuuuuu" OK, not quite. She melts! Into water, (sweet, delicious water) and then reforms! "We have a job to do~!"
[15:59:23] <~GMShifty> "Mmmhmmmm~" Emi's glasses catch the light, whiting out. Siblings are such monsters.
[16:00:44] <Azuno> Azuno is oblivious to this, "Right then, good thing I came along, lets go!" She strides out the still-open door
[16:01:05] <~GMShifty> Emi follows after Azunon, burying herself in her spellbook.
[16:02:51] <Miura> Miura follows Azuno more actively! What she sees, who knows, but at least she's in it.
[16:06:26] <~GMShifty> "Maybe we should go where you were attacked?"
[16:06:54] <Azuno> "Of course! I knew that! follow me!" She goes off towards where she met the zombified human
[16:08:23] <~GMShifty> Azuno leads her cousins to the river, where the ghoulified fisherman is still wandering about.
[16:09:23] <Azuno> "Go on Emi!" she shoves her cousin towards the fisherman, not wanting to approach
[16:10:14] <Miura> "Yeah, go on! You're the brains, it'll probably respond to you!"
[16:10:39] <~GMShifty> "W-well... maybe Miura should go first..."
[16:12:36] <Azuno> "Didn't you just say you wanted to get close?
[16:13:16] <~GMShifty> The fisherman wanders about, making a pained groan.
[16:13:24] <~GMShifty> Emi hides behind Azuno.
[16:13:57] <Azuno> Azuno tries to push Emi in front again, "DIDN"T...YOU...SAY..."
[16:14:45] <~GMShifty> The Fisherman looks in the direction of the three.
[16:16:05] <Azuno> Azuno freezes
[16:16:23] <Miura> Miura looks back.
[16:16:53] <Miura> "Are...are you a zombie, mister?"
[16:17:08] <~GMShifty> "Hrrrgnhhhh...."
[16:17:58] <Miura> She turns back to the others. "He says 'hrrrgnhhhh'. I think that's a yes?"
[16:18:22] <~GMShifty> "Time for my upgraded, spell, The 'Youkai beyo-" Emi is lifted, "Hey! Hey! Put me down!"
[16:20:08] <Azuno> Azuno throws Emi at the zombie fisherman
[16:20:09] <~GMShifty> Emi sails forward towards the Ghoulified fisherman.
[16:21:15] <Azuno> "DO your thing emi!"
[16:21:38] <Miura> "That thing that you do!"
[16:21:43] <Miura> "You get close to em, and..."
[16:21:54] <Miura> "...Um. What does she do, again?"
[16:22:00] <~GMShifty> "I was about to!" The Fisherman looms over Emi.
[16:22:09] <Azuno> "Cast magic!"
[16:22:19] <~GMShifty> "I was gonna make us all invisible and... oh...." Emi glances up.
[16:22:29] <Miura> Miura catches on. "Bit late! Run away~!"
[16:22:58] <Miura> "If we're lucky, you're faster than a slow walker. And if they want brains that badly, maybe you can still cast magic~!"
[16:23:28] <Azuno> "Pshh, have you no faith in your sister?" Azuno says already standing a distance away
[16:24:11] <~GMShifty> Emi hops to her tiny feet and runs, the Fisherman keeping hot on her heels.
[16:24:55] <Miura> "I'm pretty sure Itsuki has a crush on one of her own snakes." She answers the question with something not entirely unrelated!
[16:25:03] <~GMShifty> She flips through her book while running, "New spell, new spell! Where is my new spell!?"
[16:25:47] <Azuno> Azuno sees Emi running towards them, and attempts to keep emi squarely between herself and the fisherman
[16:26:54] <~GMShifty> "I got it!" A spell circle appears between Emi's feet and she turns to face the Fisherman. He lunges at Emi, freezing in mid air.
[16:27:00] <~GMShifty> The little inchling runs off to the side.
[16:28:06] <Azuno> Azuno follows Emi
[16:28:31] <Azuno> "Good job Emi, I knew you could do it!"
[16:28:35] <~GMShifty> "Grip of Conscience!" She huffs, "He'll snap out of it quick though, so get ready!"
[16:29:54] <Miura> "Uh, we definitely shoot him, then."
[16:30:04] <Miura> "...In the head...non-lethally?"
[16:30:22] <Miura> "Man, zombies are confusing. Maybe they just want brains so they can understand themselves."
[16:30:31] <~GMShifty> The fisherman slams into the ground, he turns his head towards the three.
[16:30:43] <Azuno> "So how do we fix him Emi?"
[16:30:55] <~GMShifty> "Hit him until he stops moving?"
[16:31:21] <Miura> "Always the plan!" Miura is down with that plan. Surely, nothing wrong with shooting a villager until they can't move anymore. Nothing at all.
[16:32:12] <Miura> Miura fires bright blue lasers! Those are pretty shiny, and they kinda sting!
[16:32:51] <~GMShifty> Emi opens her book and casts magical pink homing orbs.
[16:33:20] <~GMShifty> The ghoulified fisherman swipes at the three.
[16:35:39] <~GMShifty> The villager smacks away Miura's and Emi's danmaku, but Azuno's larger shots prove too difficult.
[16:35:57] <~GMShifty> Emi begins casting a spell.
[16:36:04] <Miura> Miura bends, like water, out of the way! "I think it's a slow one. That's good. The kind that run are scary."
[16:37:12] <Miura> She opts to try a different approach. Sure he can swat away shots, but perhaps swatting faster shots would be harder? She tries that!
[16:41:41] <~GMShifty> Maybe punching danmaku isn't such a great idea, the ghoulified fisherman is pummeled.
[16:42:07] <~GMShifty> Emi completes her spell, "The Youkai Beyond Notice!" Emi, Miura, and Azuno fade from sight.
[16:42:36] <Miura> "So rapid fire was better in the first place! Zombies are weak to rapid fire weapons, just like I heard~!" Miura gets excited at this revelation even as she's invisible.
[16:42:50] <~GMShifty> The villager thrashes about at the invisible inchlings.
[16:43:06] <Azuno> "Ohohohoho! What a silly zombie, can't even danmaku properly!"
[16:45:01] <Miura> "T-that's most villagers, though."
[16:45:27] <~GMShifty> "Which is why we have to protect them!"
[16:46:03] <Miura> "By shooting them!"
[16:46:22] <~GMShifty> Emi fires off wildly curving versions of her pink danmaku.
[16:49:40] <Miura> Miura keeps up the hail of...hail. It's water! Just colder, and more solid. Comes down pretty hard.
[16:52:00] <Azuno> Azuno is ohohoing too loudly, and is probably giving away her location because of that; she gets smacked by the zombie villager.
[16:53:36] <~GMShifty> The Fisherman bashes away all attacks but Azuno, hitting her as she hits him. The villager spins and lands on his back, his skin color returning to a healthy hue.
[16:53:46] <~GMShifty> He exhales deeply, apparently sleeping on the spot.
[16:54:16] <Azuno> "Ewww he touched me! he got his germs on me!"
[16:54:39] <~GMShifty> The three fade back into view.
[16:55:40] <Miura> "W-wait, does that mean you're infected?!"
[16:56:20] <Miura> "I hear zombies infect by biting but I think that's just the surefire way and just touching you could do it too!"
[16:56:36] <Azuno> "I'm not a zombie!!"
[16:57:26] <Miura> "Not yet! It takes a while!"
[16:59:48] <~GMShifty> Emi examines the fisherman. "He wasn't a zombie though."
[17:00:18] <Miura> "...Wait, but you're not the brains. Maybe if you're not the brains, you're imm--huh?" She joins in the looking!
[17:00:48] <~GMShifty> Emi points at two punctures on his neck, "He was a Ghoul! I knew I sensed blood magic!"
[17:01:16] <Azuno> Azuno, "Then what is he??" she goes over to emi, "Oh, of course! How silly of me."
[17:01:50] <~GMShifty> "A vampire did this!"
[17:02:30] <Miura> "A vampire?!"
[17:02:50] <Azuno> "But, the scarlet devils havent been out of their mansion in weeks!"
[17:03:04] <~GMShifty> 'Mmm.... But what about that other one?"
[17:03:56] <Miura> "...The one that came in and screamed about...er, not scarlet...red something? Come-you-nizem?"
[17:04:08] <Miura> "She was loud. It was probably her."
[17:04:11] <~GMShifty> "That was the one."
[17:04:36] <Miura> "So we gotta beat her up, then!"
[17:05:58] <~GMShifty> "Are we sure it was her, though?"
[17:06:19] <Miura> "What other vampires are there?"
[17:06:26] <Miura> "Plus, she was loud."
[17:07:10] <Azuno> "Thats true, the loudest wheel gets the silencing grease!"
[17:09:02] <~GMShifty> "Mmm..." Emi closes her book, "Well, this person seems alright now. To the source!"
[17:12:33] <Azuno> "To the source!" Azuno marches to the loud vampire's house...then finds marching is too slow and flies
[17:13:30] <~GMShifty> Ekaterina's home sits hauntingly in the midst of her orchard, looking like something out of a dark fairy tail. Fruits, nice and ripe swing from the trees.
[17:13:59] <~GMShifty> Emi's sense of things magical are set off by these. "Stay away from those... theres something wrong about them."
[17:14:53] <Miura> "...Maybe they make people into zombies."
[17:15:13] <Miura> "Why are people eating devil fruit? You won't get superpowers or anything."
[17:17:25] <Azuno> "Humans aren't the smartest, that's why we protect them!"
[17:18:18] <~GMShifty> "Mmm..." Emi ducks under the vampires front door, into her living room.
[17:20:03] <Azuno> Azuno follows suit; see, she isn't infected! if she was, then she wouldn't be able to enter uninvited!
[17:21:15] <~GMShifty> Two doors flank the inchlings on either side. Directly ahead is a pair of couches and a strange tea related apparatus. On either side of the end of the room are two staircases ascending to the upper floor.
[17:23:00] <Miura> Touche! Miura slips inside as well! "...Hmmm. Wait, this is a vampire. She's probably sleeping right now."
[17:23:09] <Miura> "Like the dead."
[17:23:20] <Miura> "...Like Emi."
[17:23:21] <~GMShifty> "I wish I were sleeping still." Emi glares at Azuno.
[17:23:34] <~GMShifty> Emi knocks Miura atop the head.
[17:24:01] <Azuno> Azuno ignores the glaring, "Well, did anyone bring a steak?"
[17:24:57] <Miura> "I only made rice balls..."
[17:25:15] <~GMShifty> Emi groans.
[17:28:11] <~GMShifty> "Where do you think she is?"
[17:28:26] <Azuno> "Hrm...the basement, if vampire stories are to be believed!"
[17:29:20] <~GMShifty> "I don't see an entrance? Maybe in one of the side rooms?"
[17:29:48] <Azuno> Azuno goes under the left door, looking for a stairway down.
[17:30:12] <Miura> "We'll have to find a way down, then! I'll go right!" It's probably the right way. She goes right!
[17:30:52] <~GMShifty> Under the left door is a study, the walls lined with many books and various odd trinkets.
[17:31:12] <~GMShifty> To the right is the Vampire's kitchen, a closet door and a particularly heavy wooden door sit side by side.
[17:32:58] <Miura> "Too many doors!" ...Closet? She hears that a lot of girls are in closets nowadays. Might as well.
[17:33:28] <Azuno> Azuno comes back, not telling emi about the books because it would just slow them down.
[17:33:31] <Azuno> "
[17:33:31] <~GMShifty> The closet is full of tea mainly, not much in the way of actual food. Mainly little treats.
[17:33:38] <Azuno> "Did you find something, miura?"
[17:33:59] <~GMShifty> Emi follows Miura, "What'd you see, Azuno?
[17:34:25] <Azuno> "A dead end...but i bet that's not!" Azuno points to the big obvious door.
[17:35:15] <~GMShifty> Emi gets down low near the threshold. "It'... doesn't smell nice down there."
[17:35:28] <~GMShifty> "Like... death."
[17:35:55] <Miura> "...Just food over here. Devil food." She follows Emi! "Then, we'll find death down here!"
[17:36:02] <Azuno> "That's probably it!"
[17:38:14] <~GMShifty> The vampires basement is dimly lit. Old hooks swing from the ceiling, several jars line the walls with unidentifiable contents, and peculiar red-brown stains cover the floor.
[17:38:22] <~GMShifty> Emi clings to Azuno.
[17:39:01] <Azuno> Azuno barges ahead boldly, only bringing emi closer to the fated encounter
[17:39:50] <~GMShifty> Emi digs her heeals in.
[17:40:07] <~GMShifty> "I wanna go home!"
[17:41:01] <Azuno> "We gotta destroy the vampire though!"
[17:41:10] <Azuno> "OTherwise the village wont be safe!"
[17:41:14] <Miura> "But if we don't do anything, our home will be full of not-zombies-but-still-pretty-close-to-zombies!"
[17:41:36] <~GMShifty> "Maybe it will get better by itself!"
[17:41:48] <Azuno> "PSh, when does that work?"
[17:41:49] <~GMShifty> "I don't see a coffin anyways..."
[17:44:15] <Azuno> "Hrm..." Azuno spreads out looking for clues! and coffins!
[17:44:24] <Miura> "It's dark, though. Maybe we just can't see it..."
[17:46:25] <~GMShifty> Azuno only finds more horribly unspeakable things.
[17:46:40] <Azuno> "Hrm, these aren't coffins."
[17:47:37] <Miura> "Huhhh. Maybe those radical new ideas she was talking about involve sleeping...upstairs instead?"
[17:48:02] <Azuno> "That'd be weird..."
[17:48:17] <Azuno> "Oh, maybe she isn't home!"
[17:48:20] <~GMShifty> "Iagreeletsgo." Emi drags her sister and cousin.
[17:49:33] <Miura> Miura shrugs, and goes upstairs! ...And then attempts to go further upstairs! "She was pretty weird. Was spouting nonsense last time she came."
[17:51:16] <~GMShifty> There are numerous doors upstairs, all seem to be some sort of bedroom from a quick peak, the obvious one presents itself though. A dark wooden coffin, set atop a bed.
[17:52:00] <Miura> She keeps it down. "S-see? Weird vampire."
[17:52:02] <Azuno> "Oh wow, cow-moo-ism IS weird..."
[17:52:17] <Miura> "Why is she sleeping with two beds?"
[17:52:41] <Azuno> Azuno boldly goes over, trying to lift up the coffin lid.
[17:52:54] <Miura> Trying is a key word. Miura attempts to help!
[18:15:10] * Azuno is now known as Aeros

NEXT TIME ON MINIHOUS: regret, mostly