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Cerenth

Bloriginal Blaracter

Nov 29th, 2012
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  1. >Wake up groggily.
  2. >You had a heavy night last night.
  3. >You’ve got to learn to lay off the Applejack Daniels.
  4. >You wearily make your way downstairs and to your delicious coffee machine.
  5. >Wonderful, life-giving coffee.
  6. >Truly the nectar of the gods.
  7. >You know this because Celestia drinks it too.
  8. >Your contemplation is shattered by a knock at the door.
  9. >The incessant tapping reverberates through your skull to your very core.
  10. >Curse hangovers. Couldn’t they have stayed on Earth? Why did they have to be transported to Equestria as well?
  11. >You stomp angrily to the door.
  12. >You already know who it is.
  13. >You fling it open to reveal Fluttershy in her latest fetish attempt.
  14. >She’s accompanied by Rainbow Dash today.
  15. >Neither of them have wings, and their colours are slightly changed.
  16. “What is it today, Fluttershy?”
  17. >She cowers like usual when you raise your voice.
  18. >”I-I’m sorry Mr. Anon... B-but I’m not Fluttershy... *mumble*”
  19. >Ugh. You hate when she does this.
  20. “Speak up, ‘not-Fluttershy’. I can’t hear you.” You growl. You’re running out of patience.
  21. >”Hey! Don’t bully my friend, you big meanie!” Rainbow Dash retorts.
  22. “RD, why are you helping her this time?” You say to her, coolly.
  23. >”RD? How could you confuse us with those guys? I’m not Rainbow Dash. I’m my own original character, Blainbow Blash!”
  24. >She rears proudly on her hind legs for added effect.
  25. >”A-and I’m my own original character... B-b-bluttershy...”
  26. >Oh they can’t be serious.
  27. >This is like something out of a bad fanfiction.
  28. >You facepalm.
  29. >You look back up.
  30. >They’re still there.
  31. >You facepalm again.
  32. >”A-are you ok, Mr. Anon?” Bluttershy asks.
  33. “No. No I’m not. I’m pretty sure I’m in shock. What do you want with me?”
  34. >”W-well... We were wondering if your fetish might be... Oh no! It’s happening again!”
  35. >You raise an eyebrow in confusion as both Bluttershy and Blainbow Blash start freaking out.
  36. >They start to put on weight for no discernable reason.
  37. >Then with a sound like a balloon being blown up, they start inflating.
  38. >”Oh no! I’m inexplicably being inflated again!” Blainbow Blash exclaims.
  39. >How embarassing.
  40. >Soon the two ponies are almost as big as your house, and almost translucent.
  41. >You scratch your head in confusion as they slowly rise off the ground.
  42. >They’re soon caught by a gust of wind and blown away into the distance.
  43. >You probably should have helped them...
  44. >Well, never mind. You’ll probably never see them again.
  45. >Just as well, you don’t need another Fluttershy trying to guess your fetish.
  46. >Speaking of whom, she is walking towards your house now.
  47. >Her eyes light up when she sees you waiting for her.
  48. >”Oh Anon! Did you get my present?”
  49. >Present?
  50. >You shrug in confusion.
  51. >”I was wondering if your fetish is poorly designed OCs?”
  52. >You’re about to answer when you hear the clip clop of hooves behind you.
  53. >You turn to see King Sombra walk downstairs from your bedroom.
  54. >You had an awesome night last night with him.
  55. >The things he can do with that horn are just amazing.
  56. >”GRAAARGH?”
  57. “Oh it’s just Fluttershy, sweetie.”
  58. >Fluttershy looks mortified.
  59. >”GRAARGH, GRARRGH.”
  60. “I just brewed a fresh pot. Help yourself.”
  61. >”Grarrgh.”
  62. >King Sombra trots over to the coffee maker and pours himself a cup of joe.
  63. >You turn back to Fluttershy who now has tears in her eyes.
  64. “To answer your question, yes, but not with you.”
  65. >She turns and gallops away, crying.
  66. >As she’s running she screams back to you,
  67. >”I’ll show you, Anon! I’ll be the worst character you’ve ever seen!”
  68. >You have no doubt about that.
  69. >You hate her already.
  70. >Fucking Fluttershy.
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