There was a kid who didn't get along with frames. His parents had a certain way of seeing the world - to them, if the child has money, then everything else is fine. You can even call it ... a frame. All he saw during childhood was a father beyond visiting on Fridays and bringing a hamburger was not, and a mother who had been in constant war with him until the age of 18, because he didn't do "what needs to be done." It took many years for the child to realize that "what needs to be done" is just another way of saying "what it takes to make money in the future."
The boy hated school so much that there were periods when he would go to bed crying, knowing he had to get up in the morning for another day. Not that school was hard, not because he didn't like learning, on the contrary - learning new things was the only thing he liked. He cried with frustration at the waste of time and the lack of learning at school. After all, why get up before sunrise, when even the birds barely started to squeak, to sit and get bored for hours, day after day after day after day. But the frame is the frame, and Dad's not there, and Mum is at war, and that's how the years went by.
The boy grew up a bit and went to the army. He suffered there for 3 years because every day had to be up before sunrise, when even the birds barely started to squeak ... to sit and get bored for hours, day after day after day after day. But the frame is the frame, and Dad is not there, and Mom is no longer there, there is no more war, because the child is doing "what needs to be done."
The boy finished an army, a little less a boy, but mostly even more frustrated with life and the insignificance of everything he did for 21 years. But because he had no direction for life, he worked in the family business and at some point moved away from home.
His life was empty of any content. Every day he would saw holes or knock on bins with a hammer. Sometimes even over 12 hours a day, because what's more. While not at work, he wasted time on computer games, because what's more. Father was not, and mother was not. After all, the child has money now, and the frame is the frame.
For how long it worked, the kid just became a robot. He entered the frame. He had money. Everything should be fine.
But then something happened - he stopped being a robot. Not by choice, but that's how it came out. And suddenly everything was not right. There is money, the frame is the frame, Father is not, Mother is not, nothing has changed, but everything has changed.
He could no longer come day after day to who knows how many hours to work. He started to become less consistent, and as things got worse, he looked for ways to suffer less. He tried to run and go to the gym, but that didn't mean much either. He tried alcohol, but quickly realized that he didn't.
After a lifetime of total resistance to "drugs," he tried cannabis. Cannabis helped the child not to think about it, not to think about how meaningless everything was.
But what to do, drugs didn't fix anything, and things continued to deteriorate.
He continued to be less and less consistent, until the day came that he simply could no longer drag himself to work. For months he sat in his apartment, continued to consume cannabis, and did nothing meaningful. But he had money, so dad wasn't, and mom wasn't. After all, the frame is the frame.
Towards the end of the apartment lease, the cannabis is over. And what to do when you can't get out of our heads?
The boy stopped eating. He had barely left his room. All he had to do was stare at the computer screen, because he couldn't play games anymore either. After a short time, he too could no longer sleep. The only action that gave him a few hours of quiet, and here she went too. But he still had a significant amount of money, so Dad doesn't, and Dad doesn't, and the frame is the frame.
The boy finally decided to do something about it. After all, the child does not get along with frames, cannabis does not sleep, does not leave the room, does not have a father, does not have a mother, the only thing left is to die, and in any case his body was near death from lack of food and sleep.
He started looking for information on the Internet, and the Internet, like the Internet, led him to all the pages that give reasons not to die. All meaningless "motivational" videos. With frustration, he shared his desire to die with a friend from the Internet, and the friend convinced him not to.
The boy called Mom the same day from the pharmacy and asked her about sleep-aiding supplements, which the boyfriend recommended.
At the time, he still didn't understand why he couldn't just finish and that's it. If time is understood, something is broken in it. It has two halves, one logical, and one biological. The first one wants to end the story. The other just wants to live, because what else he could want after millions of years of evolution.
After contacting a friend, the boy started eating again. It was difficult on day one, but the human body has ways to adapt, and it has returned to poor but reasonable physical condition. Suddenly, instead of ending all the problems, he got stuck without a contract for an apartment, and without an apartment to go to, and he moved in with his dad until he found an apartment.
He had been there for months, and those three months were an ongoing nightmare. The child sat there day after day without moving, could hardly find the motivation to play, program, learn, work, or anything else.
Day after day, every conversation with his dad was another comment about not looking for apartments, and see how much time other people spend on it, and stop wasting time.
The boy finally found a terrible apartment.
He moved to her, without telling his dad or his mom where she, after all, has money, and the framework is the framework, so what he'll tell them is who's interested.
And so two years went by. Two years in which he sat in the same room, consumed cannabis, and did nothing of value or significance. But he had money, and the frame is the frame, so no father and no mother ...
Then the money ran out. What to do, is what money does. The boy again planned to finish the story. Some can already pull off bad stories.
One day he happened to be at work, and in case his cousin was there. They hadn't had much contact for many years, but in a supernatural way, the cousin immediately realized something was wrong. Instead of working for his uncle, he mostly talked to the boy for a few hours, and once again he won the biological part. Once again the boy is alive.
Then the money really ran out. That is, no more "two months", "another month".
With no choice the boy managed to get back to work. If he doesn't finish the story, the minimum he can do is work a little, just earn enough for another month of suffering, and more cannabis for this month to muffle the suffering.
And so a few months went by. The child had money to close every month, so no father and no mother, the frame is the frame.
But enough, how much is possible. Then again, in a very original way, the boy decided it was time to finish. This time he explored the topic more in depth, reading about methods, statistics, pain levels, and success stories and failure. The minimum that should do a good job, isn't it?
He came to a certain site, which expands greatly on the subject. But this site also had the bad pages. The pages that try to explain why not. For one moment the biological half won, and the boy read one page. The message there was pretty simple - to ask someone close to how they would feel if the child was down and dying. But Dad doesn't, and Mum doesn't, so why tell them something.
Once again, almost supernaturally, his partner just knocked and opened the door to say good night.
So he did the only thing he could do - ask her the question, with no emotion.
The roommate refused to leave his room until the boy shared some more details about him. After that, she would not leave his room until he agreed to go with her at that moment, in the middle of the night, to Saul village. The boy knew it was pointless, but he was such a boy who wanted to please people.
From there the story rolled, and suddenly the boy went to see a psychiatrist, and a psychologist, and try some pills.
Suddenly his father and mother began to discover details. Not because they were there, not because the child wanted to share, but only because of the partner.
And that's how they went for a few more months. Think something has changed? Think differently. The child has no more money. His dad gives him a monthly salary, no work, no work, so every month he closes. So, dad's not there, and mom's not there, and the frame is the frame.
And here we are. At almost 29, the boy is no longer a child, but nothing else has changed. He can no longer even imagine the possibility of something ever changing. He can no longer imagine any future, nothing of any significance. The question is not whether he will commit suicide, but when. When will he finally be able to silence his biological half, even just for a moment, for never having to listen to his head.
Will Dad be there? Will Mom be there?
Who knows, he won't need money anymore, and they won't be able to give him money, and the framework is the framework, so what's left.