RGRE short greens

>SPLASH
>"Don't worry, sugardick! I'll protect you from this bitch!"
"What? Oh, Celestia, get out of the water!"
>"I'll get her! Nopony makes googly eyes with MY stallion!"
"It's not making ANY sort of eyes with me, Celly-belly. That's an infat-"
>"I'll rip your feathers off!"
"That's an inflatable swan, sweetie! Luna, Moonlight, talk some sense into your sister. We're gonna be late for dinner."
>>"Steel thyself, sister! We shalt aid thee in battle! The danger posed to our stallion most sweet will be defeated!"
>SPLASH
"Goddammit, you two."

>Anon, tragically, was not blind before he came to Equestria
>Was found by changelings as soon a he arrived and was brought into their underground tunnels
>Anon just thought it was really dark down there and that the changelings had night vision
>Didn't even realize that they had walked outside until a changeling asked him why he was staring at the sun

>Just about every male villain in the history of Equestria has been some combination of bluebeaning, frigid, prude, stallionist, homo horse, or all of the above.
>Even Discord, who couldn't give less of a shit about ponies stuffy attitudes regarding sex, enjoyed bluebeaning mares just for the lulz.
>Not very conducive to attracting minion mares and making them want to stay around.
>Anon, by comparison, spends more time tending to his herd of minions than actually causing much villainy himself.
>The mares do most of troublemaking for him.
>Some of them get a little overzealous, and he has to get them to take it down a notch.