Trix of the Trade - Chapter 6 The Wild Mild West

>A sharp rapping at your door pulls you out of the ethereal realm of your dre-
>Wow, you are way too tired to do this poetic bullshit.
>Someone is knocking at your door. Much easier.
>”Wake UP! Trixie won’t have her hireling sleeping all day, you have work to do!”
>You rub your eyes and roll on to your side in response.
>The knocking continues.
>You mumble a garbled response before finally sitting up and crawling over to the door.
> You don’t bother opening your eyes while opening the door. The light would burn the eyes out of your sockets.
“Yo what’s up?”
>Trixie bops you on the head, jarring you awake.
>”What are you doing?” Trixie says harshly.
>Your face remains expressionless.
“Sleeping. Do you know how late I was up last night, getting us to Appleoosa? Nah, you were too busy getting yourself some beauty sleep?”
>She bops you a little harder.
>”Idiot, you’re SUPPOSED to be making Trixie famous!”
>You groan.
>”And make her some breakfast!”
“Fuck that.”
>She closes the door on your face in response.
“Ow.”

>You and Trixie exit the wagon a short while later.
>You had parked it next to an abandoned building on the edge of town.
>Appleoosa at night was dead, aside from the bar. From the sounds you heard coming from it, you plan to avoid it like the plague.
>During the day, however, it was bustling with life. Ponies wearing large hats and thick hide vests wandered throughout the town.
“Alright Trixie,” You pull a crumpled piece of paper out of your pocket, “If you’re going shopping, I made a li-“
>”Ha! What makes you think I am?”
“Uh, you’d actually trust me with the bits you made in Ponyville?”
>She scoffs and gives you a passive wave.
>”Trixie gave you bits for your help in Ponyville, just use that!”
>Is she serious?
“Are you serious?”
>She nods with a smile.
>This bitch thinks she’s in the right.
“Right…”
>You slap Trixie’s hat off and impale the list on her horn.
>”Hey!”
>Without saying a word, you begin walk into town.
>”Where do you think you’re going?!”
>You spin on your heels and look back at her.
“To do my job.”
>You wish a pair of sunglasses fell from the heavens and landed on your face at that moment.

>Alpha status: 200%
>Holy shit that felt good.
>Trixie must be in some sort limbo between contempt and lust after that.
>Even the mares in Canterlot fell victim to that swagture.
>You bump into and knock over a yellow stallion while you’re distracted by yourself.
>”Hey!”
>You curse under your breath.
“Sorry, dude!”
>You help him up and replace the hat upon his head.
>”You got yer head n’ the clouds or somethin’?”
“Yeah, sorry about that. Had my mind on something else.”
>His eyes dart around your body.
>”Say, aren’t you that human?”
“The one and only. The name’s Anonymous. It’s pleasure to meet you.”
>You hold your hand out. His hoof meets it.
>”Name’s Braeburn. Good ta meet ‘cha. What brings ya ‘round these parts?”
“Trying to get someone back on their own hooves. It’s not going well.”
>”Uh-oh, ‘nother Salt addict?”
“Salt is… nevermind. No, just a mare who still acts like a filly. It’s hardly tolerable and I’d leave if I weren’t getting paid.”
>”That’s a shame but ya gotta do what ‘cha gotta do ta make a livin’.”
“I suppose…”
>Braeburn looks at you sympathetically.
>”Say, is this yer first time in Appleoosa?”
“Mmmhm.”
>”Why don’ Ah give ya the ground tour? Not very excitin’ place but it’s pleasant enough.”
“Yeah, sounds nice.”

>”An’ this is the local saloon! Ah suggest ya don’ go in after midnight, Gets a little crazy in there.”
“Yeah, I heard when I came into town, late last night.”
>”Shoot, why ya travelin’ at that time? It gets mighty cold durin’ the nights.”
“Boss said so.”
>”Well that just ain’t fair, why would ya even agree to that?”
“Dunno, she’s just my boss, you know?”
>”Ah know but ya gotta draw the line somewhere.”
“I know that much. She ordered me to cook breakfast for her this morning, can you believe that?”
>”What’d ya say?”
“No, of course!”
>”Good, nopony need to be takin’ those kinda orders… What ‘chu do anyway?”
>You half-heartedly shrug.
“Bring in the crowds, I guess. Sweet talk the locals and whatnot.”
>”Ya aren’ doin’ much sweet talkin’, so far. Ju’s make me wanna not go to… What does your employer do, exactly?”
“Magic show.”
>”Magic? We don’ get many Unicorns out here an’ the only one who lives here is Stitches the Tailor. Anyway, Ah don’ really want ta go watch any show with a pony like your employer as the attraction.”
“I und-“
>”But, Ah see yer in a real tight spot, partner. Ah’ll see if Ah can round up some friends an’ family, ask ‘em to be all generous-like. So long as ya either quit when ya can or convince her that she needs you. ”
“You’d do that?”
>”Course! Anythin’ for a friend!”
“That’s… really awesome, Braeburn. Thank you.”
>You place a hand on his shoulder. He shudders at your touch.
>”Not a problem… Anonymous. Ah-Ah-Ah gotta go… Ah’ll see you later.”
“Yeah, later.”
>You give him a small wave as Braeburn uncomfortably walks away.
>Sucker.

>You are THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE!
>And you are frothing over Anonymous’ defiance!
>He didn’t cook breakfast!
>He didn’t make tea!
>And he forced you to spend YOUR OWN MONEY for food when it should be him!
>He’s a stupid smart human, he can find a way to buy what’s needed on his small budget.
>You take another look at the list.
>Nevermind, he’s stupid stupid. Vegtables? Oats?! Is he joking?!
>You toss the list, anything that isn’t a fruit is pig disgusting.
>”’Ey! You there!”
>You swing your head around and lock eyes with a big, burly, mustached earth pony.
>”Pick up yer trash…”
>He narrows his eyes.
>This is so hilariously cute you just can’t hold it in.
“Hahahaha! Oh please, you sound like you’re trying to threaten Trixie!”
>”Ah won’ ask again. Pick up yer trash or Ah’ll buck you so hard it’ll-“
“Trixie doubts you’ve ever bucked a mare in your life, mustache.”
>A few ponies around hoot and holler at that wicked burn.
>The stallion stumbles. His pride was hit so hard it made him physically flinch.
>”That’s it, funny hat, yer gonna get what you…”
>You tune him out. You don’t give two bits as to what he’s saying now.
>Because he just…
>Made fun.
>Of your hat.
>He’s going to die.
>The stallion procures a rope hanging from a nearby building and gets ready to catch you in a lasso.
>You gently remove your hat and set it on the ground.
>You can tear him apart from here. Implode his body, remove his entire bone structure, replace his blood with wine, anything.
>No, he needs to be humiliated.

>He begins to swing the lasso above his head.
>You won’t have it. Your horn lights up in magic as you control the rope.
>You tightly tie it around his throat.
>He collapses, making guttural noises and begging for you to stop.
>You slowly approach him.
>Oh, how you would love to watch him suffer.
>But, you can’t do that. A murder would tarnish your reputation forever.
>Also, you’re not really killer.
>Finally you cool off a little and simultaneously loosen the rope around his throat as you hogtie him.
>You put your hat back on, looking proud.
>Onlookers approach you and your assailant. Uh-oh.
>”Thank ya, miss! This one was a real nut, always threatenin’ us fer the smallest things. Never actually attacked before. Now that he has, we can throw ‘im in jail fer a little.”
>That was… unexpected.
“It’s the least Trixie could do! She may be a performer but she revels in removing scum such as this stallion off the streets!”
>Another pony speaks up.
>”Performer?”
>More ponies begin to gather at the spectacle.
>”What do you do?”
>”You’re a performer?”
>”Do you do any cool tricks?”
>You feel a smile grow on your face.
>Suckers.

>You are Anonymous.
>And you are still on the prowl for any gullible folks are would fall for the fancy words of a city slicker, such as yourself.
>You nearly tried the saloon but a bottle missed your head by inches just as you took your first step in.
>You’re going to need one hell of a façade if you want to convince these drunks to do anything.
>You remember Breaburn mentioning something about a tailor so you pay him a visit.
>Quickdraw Suitors. Appropriate.
>You enter the small building. The interior is just one large room, fabrics and hides stored in little cubbys, sewing materials laid out neatly upon a desk in the corner, and other tools scattered around the shot.
>The one you guess to be Stiches works on an elegant suit draped over an Equinequin.
>He is an old Unicorn. His coat was piss yellow and he had a pure white mane.
>He turns his attention to you.
>”How ya doin’ there partner? Good? That’s great! What can Ah do ya for?”
>Jeez, he talks fast.
“Uh, I’m just looking for something that’ll help me fit in a little.”
>”Very good. What ‘cha goin’ for? Farmer look? Big, responsible, reliable. How’s ‘bout a lone wanderer? Cold ‘n mysterious.  Duster would go perfect on ya. Oh! How about the classic Coltboy look, hm? Heroic, adventurous,”
>He gets close and nudges your side.
>”An’ the ladies go crazy fer that one.”
“I like the sounds of that last one, is it pricey?”

>”Ah do my best to keep yer coin purse full. Ah assume yer just visitin’ and Ah can quickly get ‘cha a nice little novelty suit. Good fer wearin’ for a little while, not made to withstand the elements out here. Cost ya 60 bits and an hour of your time.”
>Shit. With the 24 bits you got form Trixie combined with the small amount of dosh you had saved up, you only come to…
“I only have 52 bits on me, is there some sort of deal we can come to?”
>”Hmmm…” He trots over to a workbench, quill rapidly moving over a piece of paper.
>”’Spose Ah could remove that faux ammo belt. Use a belt buckle made outta aluminum. Best Ah can do without changin’ the cougar hide.”
>So that’s what the stuff was made of…
>”Yeah, best Ah can do at that price.”
>You begin to get VERY EXCITED! YOU GET TO LOOK LIKE A COWBOY!
>YOU REMOVE A SMALL COIN PURSE FROM YOUR POCKET WHEN YOU REMEMBER SOMETHING!
“Wait, would you be able to make something for me? You know, with my body type and all…”
>”Shoooot, it’d be no problem, partner. Ah’d used to make suits fer Minotaurs all the time and yer feet resemble somethin’ of a young dragon’s. Now, like Ah said…”
>He drapes 3 measuring tapes over your body at the same time.
>”One hour.”
>He doesn’t like.
>After a short hour, you’re walking out of that tailor’s shot. Western Swag at maximum and bitless.
>A familiar voice calls to you.
>”Well now don’ you look mighty handsome!”

>No way.
>Dude, no way.
>You turn to the source of the voice.
>Indeed, the orange mare with an apple cutie mark stands in the middle of the dirt road.
“Applejack?”
>”Eeeyup” She trots over to you.
“What are you doing he-PHOH!”
>She jabbed a hoof into your gut.
>”Why’d ya run off to without tellin’ nop0ny?! Had us all worried sick!”
“Ehehe, sorry. It was just something I needed to do, you know?”
>Applejack lightly kicks the grounds.
>”Spose Ah understand. Still woulda been nice of ya to tell somep0ny.”
“Yeah, my bad…”
>”S’right it’s yer bad… What’re ya doin’ here anyway?”
“Workin’.”
>She raises an eyebrow.
>”Ya know Ah don’ rightly care for that kind of illusiveness, Anon.”
“Right… Um. You remember Trixie?”
>Applejack’s scowl grows.
>”Ah remember how much she hurt my brother. He’s still all torn up ‘bout that, you know.”
“I know, Applejack, I know. It’s just,”
>You rubs your eyes. This is a shitty thing to talk about.
“You know how tough things were for me. Trixie was the only one to offer me any kind of opportunity.”
>”What do you mean? Ah would hired ya back at the farm if ya just got a little stronger.”
“But, that’s just it, Applejack. I wanted to be hired at something I’m good at. Something I enjoy.”

>”How can you enjoy bein’ around that… mule!”
“Occupational hazard.”
>This elicits a cute giggle from Applejack.
>”Well alright, then. If ya think it’s the right thing to do, Ah won’ stop ya.”
>You rustle her mane a little.
“Thanks, Applejack.”
>She nuzzles your hand for a second before realizing what she’s doing.
>”Er… Sorry. Old habits.”
“Yeah… don’t worry about it.”
>Okay, physical contact with Applejack is still not safe.
>The two of your stand in a momentary awkward silence.
“Soooooo, why are you here?”
>”Oh! Ah’m visitn’ my  cousin an’ his family ta help with the upcomin’ apple buckin’ season!”
“Cool, cool…”
>”… Would ya like ta come meet him?”
“Yeah! Yep, sure.”
>Applejack leads you somewhere just outside of town.
>It is a quiet, awkward walk.
>The two of you stop at a small house just outside an Apple orchard.
>Applejack knocks on the door.
>No answer.
>”Shoot, he aught ta be home…”
>She knocks on the door again.
“I actually have work that still needs to be done so I’m just going to…”
>”Wait!”
>You look at her, wide-eyed.
>”Uh… Mind if Ah tag along? My cousin is kind of a snore an’ Ah’d like ta catch up with ya a little.”
“Yeah, that’s fine. I won’t exactly be channeling the Element of Honesty, though.”
>”What’d ya mean by that?”

>You are THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE again.
>You’re currently inside the Appleoosa Saloon, wooing a few stallions with false stories.
>They WOULD be true if the opportunity presented itself!
>But, such is the life of the Mare of Magic.
>Opportunity only presents itself to those unable to handle it.
>And perfect ponies like you get shoved into the gutter.
>It’s a shame really. You learn to cope with the-
>A pony comes into the saloon.
>OH DEAR SHITTING CELESTIA! IT’S THAT ORANGE PONY AGAIN!
>Please please please please don’t see Trixie…
>Wait, Anonymous followed her in?
>What’s going on here? Why is Anonymous in such a goofy outfit?
>This requires a little subtlety.
>Initiate low-key lurk mode.
>You’d be a great ninja if you had more time on your hooves.
>The orange pony sits somewhere on the opposite side of the saloon, thank goodness, while Anonymous approaches the bar.
>What’s his game?
>He orders a drink.
>Several large ponies slowly converge on him.
>One finally speaks to him.
>”Yer one funny lookin’ Pony. Never seen ya ‘round these parts.”
>Anonymous turns to him, his goofy and absolutely not charming outfit is intimidating the pony enough. The blank expression of a hollow man forces the pony to step back.
>”I aint from around here. And I aint a pony. I just came to visit ya’ll in your little…”
>He takes a sip of his drink.
>”Paradise…”

>A few ponies in the crowd chuckle.
>”Don’ know if you took a good look but this aint no paradise.”
>”Compared to where I come from, this is Canterlot.”
>”Heh, where DID you come from?”
>”The West… But, not just any West.”
>The crowd leans in.
>”The Wild West...”
>Some of the crowd ooo’s and ahhhh’s.
>The pony that confronted Anonymous wasn’t impressed.
>”Sounds like some fruity fru-fru land, t’ me!”
>Anonymous sets his drink down firmly. His voice carries harshness.
>”Sir, I have yet to find any land in Equestria where you get blisterin’ heat in one spot, freezing mountains in another, and an ocean  threatenin’ to swallow everything whole on its coast. Please, go on about how dangerous it is here in the MILD West, where the most horrible thing you’ll find is somep0ny who doesn’t know how to square dance.”
>That shuts the stupid stallion up.
>”And if you think that’s bad, consider yourself lucky ya’ll didn’ meet its inhabitants. Hipsters, Hippies, Ultra-Liberals, Ultra-Conservatives, Gangsters, Wannabe Gangsters. Oh yes, we had them all.”
>The crowd mummers.
>You concede. The best you can do is a little magic and shake your flank. It draws in a crowd but, Anonymous is kicking your ass.
>He knows how to plant the bug better than any other pony you know.
>AND YOU WILL NEVER TELL HIM THAT!
>”… n’ all that was left was me, the hipster, an’ the freezin’ blizzard.”
>Wait, what? You zoned out for only a minute…
>”What happened next, Anon!?”
>”What happened next? I let him go. He was broken, humiliated, and dying from the cold. I don’ know if he survived that day. But, if he did, he passed the test… of the West.”
>You groan.
>The stupid crowd eats it up, though.

>”An’ that’s what the West is about. Givin’ people second chances to prove themselves. That’s why I’m out here now. Met a cute little filly, vapid and self-centered though.”
>…
>That bucking asshole.
>”She’s ripe with talent, probably the most talented Mare in Equestria, if ya ask me.”
>You’re still mad.
>”I suggest you all be in the middle o’ town round sunset tomorrow night, she’s gonna put on one hell of a show. Be there…”
>He begins to make a figure with his hands.
>No way, he isn’t…
>He’s going to ruin everything.
>”… Or be square.”
>CELESTIA DAMN HIM!
>The ponies aren’t tearing him limb from limb for his terrible joke.
>No, they’re laughing and having a good time.
>This is the worst kind of Tartarus. You need a drink.
>The crowd around Anonymous begins to disperse. You try to catch his attention with a nonchalant wave.
>Critical failure. Time to fall back on to what works best.
>You wrap his drink in telekinesis and bump the glass against his tooth as he goes for a drink.
>Yeah. Judging by his temporary rage, it worked.
>You raise your hoof again to successfully catch his attention.
>He visibly sighs and lazily walks over to your table.
>He plops down in the seat in front of you.
“Trixie sees that you’ve been-“
>The apple mare comes from seemingly nowhere and sits right next to him.
“Eugh, busy…”
>”S’right! Anon’s been bustin’ his tail for ya!”
>”Applejack, chill.”
>”Don’ see why Ah should! She’s no good, Anon. You should jus’ leave n’ come back ta Ponyville.”
“Now look here, Hayseed…”
>”Ladies, calm down.”
>He turns to the stupid one.
>”Applejack, I haven’t made a final decision yet. We’ll see how this all plays out.”

>”Fine. Ah’m jus’ hopin’ it plays out badly.”
“From what Trixie just witnessed, she doubts that’s going to happen.”
>”Hold on there, Trixie. You still need to hold up your end.”
“Excuse me?! Trixie has been out all day attracting would be audience members! She has done more than enough.”
>Anonymous and the stupid orange horse give you deadpan looks.
“What?”
>”So… I’m supposed to perform tomorrow night?”
>You’re such an idiot…
>Stupid, stupid, stupid!
“You know what Trixie meant!”
>You walk off and leave the saloon. They think you’re insane but at least you got the last word in!
>Haha!

>You are Anonymous again.
>And what the hell is up with Trixie?
>Applejack looks just as confused as you.
>”Uh… ya wanna get outta here?”
“Yeeeup.”
>You shout to the bartender to put the drinks “On your tab.” You don’t even know how that whole thing works but he enthusiastically complies.
>The two of you exit saloon, aimlessly wandering through town.
>”Shoot, Anon. Ah had no idea you were such a good fibber.”
>She playfully bumps into you.
“Wasn’t easy with The Element of Honesty breathing down my back.”
>You bump back into her.
>”Come now, Ah ain’ here ta ruin nop0ny’s fun. ‘Sides, ya handled yourself good in there. Never met a pony as charismatic as you, no wonder Rarity liked ya the way she did.”
>Hold the phone.

“Could you… elaborate on that?”
>”E-what on what? Oh is this it?”
“Is this…”
>Huh, somehow the two of you made it to Trixie’s wagon without you noticing.
>”Mind if Ah take a peek inside?”
“As long as Trixie is out, go for it.”
>Applejack doesn’t waste a second. She immediately trots to the front door, waiting for you to open it.
>”C’mon, Ah can’t wait ta see the bedroll the two of ya share.”
>You give Applejack one last playful nudge before opening the door.
>Applejack’s mouth hangs open when she gets her first look on the inside.
>Yup, same as you.
>”This… ain’t possible.”
>The two of you shuffle in.
“My first thought, too. Pretty cool, right?”
>She doesn’t answer. She occupies herself with just… touching things.
>”Where do ya sleep?”
>You point to the left door on the far side of the room.
“I don’t have much at the moment but,”
>Applejack opens the door.
>”… Anon.”
“Yeah?”
>”There’s nothin’ here.”
“Not true! There’s… my suitcase.”
>She turns to you with a ‘Are you fucking kidding me’ expression.
>”Right. You stay put, now. Ah’ll be right back.”
>She trots past you.
“Where are you going?”
>She doesn’t answer as she leaves the wagon.
>You debate whether you should follow or not.
>You decide against it, she said she was coming back.
>You take a seat at the table and lay your head down on your hand.
>Best damn pillow you’ve had in days.

>”Hey!”
>Applejack’s voice rips you out of sleep.
>”Sorry Ah took so long. Darn shopkeeper tried to rob me with those prices an’, well, next thing Ah knew it was sunset.”
“… Huh?”
>“Ah was out gettin’ you some proper supplies but Ah see you got a head start on sleepin’.”
>You finally manage to unblur the shit out of your eyes.
>Applejack carried a couple things on her back, all tied down by a rope.
>”Gotcha a blanket, pillow, n’ a lantern fer some light. ‘Fraid Ah couldn’t get no more than that.”
>Hold on. Mind still fuzzy. Processing…
“Applejack, did you really do all that for me? I… can’t accept this.”
>”Aw horseapples, Ah jus’ wanted ta help a friend in a tight spot.”
>She grabs the lantern in her teeth then hands it off to you.
>”’Sides,” She unties the rope, blanket and pillow falling to the side. “Store owner said no refunds.”
>You lightly chuckle at the joke.
“Thank you, really. I’m going to toss these in my room then we can bust out of here and do something before-“
>The wagon door opens to a giggling Trixie.
>She spots you and Applejack, immediately turning her mood sour.
>Trixie whispers to someone behind her.
>”Great, Trixie was hoping they’d be gone.”
>”Hopin’ who’d be gone?”
>Both you and Applejack perk up at that familiar voice.
>Trixie walks in, allowing Braeburn to walk in behind her.
>”Shoot, this here is somethin’ mighty fan-“
>He sees the two of you.
>”Applejack! A-Anonymous! It’s not what it looks like, Ah swear!”
>He turns to Trixie.
>”Wait, is Anonymous joinin’ us?”
>Applejack does a spit take. You could have sworn she wasn’t drinking anything.
>Wait.
>WAIT.
>YOU JUST GOT IT.
>EW!

>”Braeburn, what n’ the hay are you doin’?!”
>Braeburn still focuses his attention on Trixie.
>”Ah’m not very comfortable with my cousin bein’ a part of this. Think we could… you know, leave her out?”
>”Cousin?!”
>Trixie adopts a very malicious grin.
>”Get your hot flank in the room over there, appleboy. Trixie will be joining you in a moment.”
>She gives Braeburn’s flank a slap as he passes by.
>”Will Ah be seein’ ya in there too, Anonymous?” He fucking winks at you.
>Braeburn, you weird piece of shit.
“No.”
>Your tone could turn this very desert into a glacier.
>”Oh…” He looks heartbroken. Good. “Ah guess that’s alright then…”
>He proceeds to Trixie’s room, blue and purple almost leaking out when he opens the door.
>Trixie bursts into laughter when he shuts the door.
>”TWO! TWO APPLE STALLIONS IN ONE WEEK! THIS IS… PFFFFTHAHAHA! OH YES, TRIXIE IS MOST CERTAINLY ENJOYING THIS!”
>Applejack is mad. Really fucking mad.
>”TRIXIE JUST HOPES HE’S AS GOOD AS THE LAST ONE!”
>Without another word, she vanishes from sight. Her voice comes from her room a minute later, paired with Breaburn’s disappointed groans.
>Applejack’s face is expressionless. Her breathing was heavy and fast. Steadily increasing in speed. She looked like she was about to explode in rage.
>Then the over exaggerated moaning starts.
“Applejack, let’s get out of here.”
>”No. Ah’ve got a better idea.”
>She bites down on your shirt and drags you into your room.
“Applejack, what’re-“
>She tosses you to the floor, lights the lantern, and closes the door.
“Ah hope yer louder n’ she is.”
>Oh fuck.
>Applerape is back.

>”Oh Anon~… OH ANON!”
“Oh FUCK YEAH, Applejack!”
>Applejack hardly suppresses a giggle before letting out an extremely fake sounding moan.
“Come on, You can do better than that.”
>“Uhh… Oh Anon!”
“You just said that.”
>”Sh-Shut up, Ah’ve no idea how this is ‘sposed to go.”
>Your turn to hold in the laughter.
“You’re not supposed to blatantly admit that.”
>It takes her a moment but she places a hoof over her mouth and blushes once she realizes what she said.
>Okay, you can’t hold it anymore. You let out a bellowing laugh, totally blowing the facade.
>Applejack follows suit moments later.
>So
>Maybe Applerape isn’t back.
>”Well it was worth a shot. Sorry Ah dragged ya into that.”
“I’d be a little upset if it weren’t so damn funny. Little bit out of character for you, though.”
>”What?”
“Figure of speech.”
>Things got a little quiet then.
>Actually, it was completely quiet.
“Did they already…”
>”Did they what?”
“Are they done in there?”
>She blushes a little.
>”Ah guess so. Ah mean it’s none of my business.”
“It’s just been a couple minutes.”
>”That’s normal, innit?”
“I don’t think so. Or, maybe it is for ponies.”
>…
>”What’s normal for humans?”
>Uh-oh, time to abort.
“Uhh… What? Sorry, I’m feelin’ pretty tired. I guess I should go to sleep early.”
>”Anon-“
“Gotta start early anyway.”
>You exit your small room to retrieve the blanket and pillow Applejack bought for you.
>And she’s still just sitting there.
>The two of you awkwardly avoid eye contact while you lay your bedding down.
>You sit on the laid out blanket, waiting for her to leave.

“Um… I’m going to sleep now.”
>Applejack continues to avoid your gaze and awkwardly taps her hooves against the floor.
>”Anon, Breaburn has the keys to the house…”
>Fuck.
>”An’ Ah don’ want to walk in on… that.”
>FUCK!
>”Ah was hopin’ Ah could spend the night here.”
>No!
>Nononononononono!
“If you need a place to sleep, I’d be happy to oblige.”
>Her face lights up. Just in time for you to snuff the lantern out.
>You hear Applejack getting comfortable on the blankets while you arrange yourself on the other side of the closet, resting your head on the suitcase.
>Augh, too early to sleep. The sun JUST set. This is so stupid.
>Applejack why.
>”Anon.”
“Mmm.”
>”There’s plenty of room over here, you don’t have ta be so uncomfortable jus’ for the sake of a lady.”
“It’s fine.”
>She gets quiet for a little bit.
>Then…
>”Anon?”
“Mmm?”
>”Have ya forgivin’ me for… What Ah did. What Ah was like?”
>You sigh.
“Yeah, I’ve forgiven you.”
>You pause, this could go in a multitude of bad directions.
“But, I haven’t forgotten.”
>You hear Applejack shift uncomfortably a few times that night. But, otherwise, silence.

>The next day goes by very quickly.
>Wake up.
>Nobody talks to nobody. Not Applejack and Braeburn. Not you and Trixie. Nobody.
>Everyone shortly leaves the wagon to do whatever they need to do.
>You attempt to approach Applejack during the day but she’s obviously avoiding you.
>And you’re avoiding Braeburn.
>Who is avoiding Applejack.
>It’s actually pretty silly.
>Before you know it, it’s already sunset.
>And most, if not all of Appleoosa has gathered on the edge of town where Trixie has set her stage up.
>It’s amazing how that wagon unfolds to be that large of a stage.
>But, that fuckin’ wagon is crazy.
>Many ponies greet you as they join the crowd. Perhaps reenacting a moment from your boastful display in the saloon or introducing themselves as a friend of Braeburn’s.
>Braeburn had a lot of weird friends.
>Breaburn is so weird.
>Something bumps into your side.
>”Hey there, sugarcube.”
“Hey, Applejack.”
>”So, uh, pretty big turnout.”
“Yep…”
>There’s the awkward silence again.
“Sorry about what I said last night.”
>”You have nothin’ ta apologize for. Ah’m sorry for everything Ah did. Ah know you said you forgave me but Ah jus’ needed to say it again.”
“Thanks AJ. So…”
>You rock on your heels.
“What’s up with Braeburn?”
>”Braeburn is one odd fella n’ let’s jus’ leave it at that.”
“You got it.”
>The sun finally sets behind to horizion.
>Fireworks shoot off from Trixie’s wagon.
>It was a bit less impressive than Ponyville’s show but…
>Trixie’s voice echoes throughout the crowd.
>”Come one, come all! Come and witness the amazing magic of the Great and Powerful Trixie!”
>Trixie appears onstage with a weak poof a smoke.
>This is looking bad.
>But, you trust Trixie to pull herself out of this.

--
“TRIXIE! SLOW DOWN!”
>”NO! RUN FASTER!”
>Trixie sat atop her wagon, moving at speeds you really wish you knew how to harness on the trip to Appleoosa.
>You’re running alongside it, trying not to be lynched by the angry mob following closely behind you.
>You manage to get a hold of the wagon with your right hand. It’s small but you have a strong grip on it.
>You pull yourself up, praying you find a foothold.
>Your left boot finds something. You dare not look down to see what it is.
>You swing your left hand on top of the wagon and pull yourself halfway up.
“TRIXIE!”
>She looks at you over her shoulder.
“HIT IT!”
>A smirk grows on her face.
>The wagon gets an enormous burst of speed you weren’t expecting, nearly pulling you off.
>You shakily pull yourself on the wagon and cling on for dear life.
>You glace back at the mob. The glow of torches quickly fade away.
>Good. Time to catch your breath.
>Trixie notices the mob fading away.
>”Hireling.”
“You know my fucking name.”
>”Hireling!”
“… What.”
>”Take the reins.”
>She drops the reins on the bench and quickly retreats into the wagon.
“Wait, Trixie.”
>She doesn’t answer. You follow her down into the wagon.
“Trixie!”
>She continues to ignore you, opening empty cabinets in a desperate search for something.
>Wait, empty cabinets?
“Did you forget to get food?!”
>Still no answer.
“Trixie, what the hell!?”
>She’s crawling through cabinets now.
>She comes out of one with an empty wine bottle in her teeth.
>Enraged by its lack of alcohol, she throws it to the floor.
>She stands still, brooding.
>Then she turns her gaze to you, gives you a “Hmph!” and disappears into her room for the rest of the evening.

>Mad. Mad?
>YES YOU ARE FUCKING MAD!
>How can one stupid pony fuck up THAT BAD?!
>She could have done the same damn thing she did in Ponyville, minus the wizard battle!
>No! She does elementary bullshit for 10 minutes then resorts to telling everyone how amazing she is!
>FUCK! Why did you waste time on an egotistical, immature, braggart like her?!
>Done. You’re just… Done.
>You’re not going to waste time trying to help someone like this. You have no income if she has no income.
>You’ll walk back to Ponyville if you have to. Just…
>No. No, wait. You have a better idea.
>You know what to do.
>You grab a quill, ink, and a few pieces of paper from your belongings.
>You sit at the table and begin scribbling down notes. Anything coming to mind goes on the list
>And with these notes, you channel Twilight Sparkle in all her OCD goodness.
>You’re going to make one mean motherfucking list.