MKnightDH

Aku VS The Evil Overlord List (Season 5 spoilers)

May 23rd, 2017
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  1. Samurai Jack has recently ended after a hiatus lasting over a decade. Jack is, of course, victorious over the evil Aku. Some of the causes of Aku's defeat have me thinking: how does Aku, like Lord Voldemort from the Harry Potter franchise before him, stack against the Evil Overlord List? How much success does he have, and how much does he fail miserably to not be Stupid Evil? This list is built to find out.
  2.  
  3. This naturally contains spoilers for Season 5. You have been warned in case whatever link you probably used doesn't already suggest that much. I doubt it would be vanilla TV Tropes, who will ban people "for being a dick" without adhering to Show Don't Tell.
  4.  
  5. 1. My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear plexiglass visors, not face-concealing ones.
  6.  
  7. You know you're such a failure of an Evil Overlord when freaking Da Samurai has a better idea than you right off the bat. Aku falls into that. Too many of his mooks wore masks or helmets, or were robots.
  8.  
  9. Verdict: FAILURE!
  10.  
  11. 2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.
  12.  
  13. Aku's castle didn't have ventilation ducts, but I do recall cities influenced by him having ventilation ducts that Jack could crawl through. Also in the Pit of Hate was an alcove Jack used to spy on Aku when he was talking to the Chrystallis royalty. Aku was lucky he was not cut down then and there.
  14.  
  15. Verdict: FAILURE!
  16.  
  17. 3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.
  18.  
  19. Aku didn't even have a noble half-brother, or even anybody functioning to that effect.
  20.  
  21. Verdict: Neutral
  22.  
  23. 4. Shooting is not too good for my enemies.
  24.  
  25. Say hello to the inspiration for this project. Aku would try to get fancy with killing Jack and it would always backfire. Believe it or not, of course, the finale is the worst case of this, as Aku had Jack completely at his non-existant mercy and broadcasted his would-be execution when he was so undecisive on how to kill the guy before FINALLY settling on having possessed Ashi do the deed that it gave his allies time to mount a rescue mission that provided chaos that ultimately proved fatal to Aku. Trying to have possessed Ashi be the one to finish Jack is even worse because it allowed Jack to break through to her while Aku was distracted by Jack's allies, which led to Ashi warping herself and Jack back to the past, allowing Jack to kill past Aku and undo the entire Bad Future. If Aku had just killed Jack then and there, he would have become completely invincible and he would have won.
  26.  
  27. Verdict: FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE!
  28.  
  29. 5. The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.
  30.  
  31. To Aku's credit, the source of his power was within his body, and Jack's sword was consistently carried around by Jack. However, Aku had on multiple occasions grabbed Jack's sword (the fight at the graveyard and the final battle both come to mind) and gained control of it, only to blow it on overconfidence in an effort to kill Jack then and there, often in fancy methods.
  32.  
  33. Verdict: FAILURE!
  34.  
  35. 6. I will not gloat over my enemies' predicament before killing them.
  36.  
  37. Time and time again, Aku does this, and time and time again, Jack is all too happy to capitalize on this. Even having the sense to not reveal himself when he was using his Elder Nahtahkoo disguise when he sicked Cronos on Jack doesn't change this at all when Jack saw through the obvious disguise from the start and only played along to set him up for a trap.
  38.  
  39. Verdict: FAILURE!
  40.  
  41. 7. When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No." and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No."
  42.  
  43. "Hey world! I'm going to execute the one guy who can even hurt me and end my tyranny over you! Just give me like 90 years to figure out the best way to do so because I didn't think to do that beforehand!"
  44.  
  45. Verdict: FAILURE!
  46.  
  47. 8. After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks' time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.
  48.  
  49. Like Aku cared about the opposite sex beyond any tactical conveniences.
  50.  
  51. Verdict: Neutral
  52.  
  53. 9. I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labelled "Danger: Do Not Push". The big red button marked "Do Not Push" will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will not clearly be labelled as such.
  54.  
  55. Aku wasn't even the least bit tech-savvy so he couldn't even care less.
  56.  
  57. Verdict: Neutr-....know what? Aku didn't even care to understand his world. That's its own can of worms. FAILURE!
  58.  
  59. 10. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum — a small hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.
  60.  
  61. Aku always wanted Jack dead. His problem was being a sadist about it. And if he needed information, he had a viewing mirror. Unfortunately, that's also its own problem, in that Aku stopped keeping tabs on Jack once he destroyed the last time portal, right after which Jack lost his sword, and did not learn about that much until 50 years later, from Scaramouche delivering outdated intel.
  62.  
  63. Verdict: FAILURE!
  64.  
  65. 11. I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat.
  66.  
  67. AKU, KILL JACK BEFORE HIS ALLIES CAN RALLY! YOU EFFECTIVELY BECOME PERMANENTLY INVINCIBLE ONCE YOU DO THAT! THERE IS NO NEED TO BE FANCY ABOUT IT!
  68.  
  69. Verdict: FAILURE!
  70.  
  71. 12. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.
  72.  
  73. Aku had mooks and they didn't fall under this at all. Even if any of them did, we only need to look at what he did to Scaramouche, namely blowing up his head telekinetically for telling him Jack no longer had his sword before Scaramouche could explain about his outdated intel, to be sure that Aku would not treat an advisor well enough.
  74.  
  75. Verdict: FAILURE!
  76.  
  77. 13. All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.
  78.  
  79. Aku starts up the overconfidence before Jack could even have had the chance to die. The Triceraquins episode is a perfect example, in that Aku tried to inflict a slow, agonizing death to Jack, creating ONE light crack in Jack's underwater bubble trap, before announcing his reneging on the deal with the Triceraquins, who retaliate and ultimately rescue Jack just as the water has managed to get above Jack's nose.
  80.  
  81. Verdict: FAILURE!
  82.  
  83. 14. The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any other form of last request.
  84.  
  85. Aku did get THIS right. He never gave Jack anything like that, since Jack's death would effectively result in Aku's complete invincibility.
  86.  
  87. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  88.  
  89. 15. I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 1:17 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation.
  90.  
  91. More tech stuff. I would place this as Neutral if Aku even cared what a "cahm-pyoo-tohr" was, but as he didn't...
  92.  
  93. Verdict: FAILURE!
  94.  
  95. 16. I will never utter the sentence "But before I kill you, there's just one thing I want to know."
  96.  
  97. Another one Aku got right, if only because, again, killing Jack would leave nobody able to access the sword to do anything to Aku beyond annoyance.
  98.  
  99. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  100.  
  101. 17. When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.
  102.  
  103. I'm guessing Scaramouche was expecting Aku to actually do this up until the point his head got blown up.
  104.  
  105. Verdict: FAILURE!
  106.  
  107. 18. I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt to usurp power would easily fail, it would provide a fatal distraction at a crucial point in time.
  108.  
  109. Aku didn't even have a son. The closest was Scaramouche who inadvertently Aku into the final battle, albeit out of loyalty involving mishandled intel.
  110.  
  111. Verdict: Not sure; a Failure is tempting but I don't want to pad out the count arbitrarily
  112.  
  113. 19. I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was evil, but one look at the hero's rugged countenance and she'd betray her own father.
  114.  
  115. Aku didn't even realize he had a daughter (7 of them in fact, though 6 had died), and Ashi was already dead-set on helping Jack defeat Aku, but once he did realize Ashi had his essence, he put Ashi under his physical control to make her fight Jack and try to execute him. Ashi ultimately fought back and created a time portal for Jack to use, sealing Aku's fate.
  116.  
  117. Verdict: FAILURE!
  118.  
  119. 20. Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.
  120.  
  121. Aku has such a ridiculous habit of doing this that he becomes a quintessential counterexample of this point, and actually ESPECIALLY in his Elder Nahtahkoo disguise.
  122.  
  123. Verdict: FAILURE!
  124.  
  125. 21. I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set.
  126.  
  127. Aku's basic non-robot mooks were knockoff shinobi run by magic.
  128.  
  129. Verdict: FAILURE!
  130.  
  131. 22. No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.
  132.  
  133. How do you get repelled by ANYTHING when you're completely invincible to everything but one weapon that isn't even involved in the scenario? And I'm speaking of when Aku tried to get the Water Jewel for more power like the glutton he is.
  134.  
  135. Verdict: FAILURE!
  136.  
  137. 23. I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops in their use. That way — even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless — my troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and rocks.
  138.  
  139. Aku still had minions out there. Where were they to defend their master in the finale? Clearly nowhere to be seen because he didn't gather them. That left the only resistance between Jack and his sword being possessed Ashi, and we know how that went.
  140.  
  141. Verdict: FAILURE!
  142.  
  143. 24. I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line "No, This Cannot Be!! I AM INVINCIBLE!!!" (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)
  144.  
  145. Future Aku didn't mutter about invincibility on his deathbed to his credit. Past Aku didn't claim to be invincible but he did show shock that Jack returned "so soon" despite HAVING JUST USED A TIME TRAVEL POWER.
  146.  
  147. The basic rule, however, gets violated. Yeah Aku is consistently wary of Jack's sword, but that's not the problem. No, the problem is, Aku tries to set Jack up for a slow and painful death, and then if Jack has any potential allies around, Aku proceeds to cause THEM pain too, drunk on his Nigh Invulnerability. He doesn't realize those same potential allies can and will provide Jack with maneuver-based support, leaving Jack to survive and Aku to be humiliated yet again.
  148.  
  149. Verdict: FAILURE!
  150.  
  151. 25. No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot.
  152.  
  153. Ah, the Ultrabots. Designed specifically to counter Jack. There's only the little problem that their creator Extor could give Jack a way to fight back if he, say, pulled a Mistreatment Induced Betrayal while being allowed to live. Yeah, shouldn't have roasted Extor's village after he finished his job, Aku.
  154.  
  155. Verdict: FAILURE!
  156.  
  157. 26. No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me. Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my bedchamber.
  158.  
  159. Again, Aku's only interest in females would have been involving practicality.
  160.  
  161. Verdict: Neutral
  162.  
  163. 27. I will never build only one of anything important. All important systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the same reason I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at all times.
  164.  
  165. Aku thought it was a bright idea to double-cross Extor, so now those robots Jack needed extra power for can't be mass-produced.
  166.  
  167. Verdict: FAILURE!
  168.  
  169. 28. My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.
  170.  
  171. Thanks to shapeshifting and general immunity to everything except one specific weapon, this wasn't even a problem for Aku even if he had a pet monster.
  172.  
  173. Verdict: Neutral
  174.  
  175. 29. I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.
  176.  
  177. And whaddyaknow, Aku actually did this with his Ikra identity. Jack was fooled long enough for Aku to destroy the Macguffin.
  178.  
  179. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  180.  
  181. 30. All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards, and cowardly thieves in the land will be pre-emptively put to death. My foes will surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic relief.
  182.  
  183. Aku didn't even consider any enemy other than Jack could even have done anything to effectiveness, and left Jack's general allies alone for 50 years straight. This mistake came back to haunt him in the final battle when they gathered to fight Aku, providing Jack with critical leg room.
  184.  
  185. Verdict: FAILURE!
  186.  
  187. 31. All naive, busty tavern wenches in my realm will be replaced with surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick.
  188.  
  189. Aku manages this in spirit with the waitress from episode 2 functioning as an active spy.
  190.  
  191. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  192.  
  193. 32. I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by.
  194.  
  195. Aku kills Scaramouche, an assassin who could help him in the combat, on the spot when he see Jack still having his sword, before Scaramouche can get the chance to explain himself about his outdated information.
  196.  
  197. Verdict: FAILURE!
  198.  
  199. 33. I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.
  200.  
  201. The waitress spy actually uses a cloak robe, which helps Aku in his deceptions.
  202.  
  203. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  204.  
  205. 34. I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.
  206.  
  207. Actually, none of Aku's forms help unless he's retreating, fighting anybody who isn't Jack, or pulling a shapeshifter deception. If he turned into a snake, I wouldn't remember.
  208.  
  209. Verdict: Neutral
  210.  
  211. 35. I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of Generation X.
  212.  
  213. Aku has a goatee. Obviously Evil doesn't begin to describe him.
  214.  
  215. Verdict: FAILURE!
  216.  
  217. 36. I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.
  218.  
  219. By letter, I'm not remembering a case of this, but by spirit, Demongo was this problem: having all the warriors' essence in one body allowed Jack to free those warriors and watch them mob rush Demongo.
  220.  
  221. Verdict: FAILURE!
  222.  
  223. 37. If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a battle, I will believe him. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant.
  224.  
  225. That is if Aku even has a trusted lieutenant. Other than Scaramouche, and we know how that went.
  226.  
  227. Verdict: FAILURE!
  228.  
  229. 38. If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age.
  230.  
  231. Jack is an only child and hadn't even found a female companion before Ashi ("Ikra" doesn't even count). Not to mention Jack's own death would already ensure Aku's rule anyway.
  232.  
  233. Also to note, Aku captures Jack's father, and doesn't even kill him and just forces him to work, but does try to have agents hunt down Jack. It's likely the reason he didn't do this himself is because he couldn't be sure where the sword was to make sure it wouldn't be used against him and kill him.
  234.  
  235. Verdict: Neutral
  236.  
  237. 39. If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army.
  238.  
  239. Aku was quite able to justify his case of We Have Reserves. However, he would try to kill Jack whenever he could.
  240.  
  241. Verdict: Not sure
  242.  
  243. 40. I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.
  244.  
  245. You know. Aku was able to become that Flechette Storm that killed all but the sturdiest of Jack's allies. He could have done that from the start and be able to ignore the stragglers. Instead, he didn't and that was more time for Jack to get through to Ashi.
  246.  
  247. Verdict: FAILURE!
  248.  
  249. 41. Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel devices.
  250.  
  251. This was one of Aku's goals, but nevertheless, Aku succeeded for a full 50 years. Ashi came into the picture, but Aku simply didn't even realize she had time travel powers until it was too late. Other than that, Aku handled this well.
  252.  
  253. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  254.  
  255. 42. When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.
  256.  
  257. I'm not sure how Aku could have killed Jack's allies before they could ra-...know what? He had freaking 50 years to just kill them when Jack is still only one man and his using time travel was no longer an issue. Even without that, he failed to account for them, which was his undoing.
  258.  
  259. Verdict: FAILURE!
  260.  
  261. 43. I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans.
  262.  
  263. Aku never got the chance for this. Then again, that was because of his innate 0% Approval Rating.
  264.  
  265. Verdict: FAILURE!
  266.  
  267. 44. I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance.
  268.  
  269. The Imakandi. Enough said.
  270.  
  271. Verdict: FAILURE!
  272.  
  273. 45. I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up I will not draw my weapon, point it at him, say "And here is the price for failure," then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.
  274.  
  275. Aku would be getting this right, but he has a clear Chronic Backstabbing Disorder. Just ask either the Triceraquins, or Extor and his village.
  276.  
  277. Verdict: FAILURE!
  278.  
  279. 46. If an advisor says to me "My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?", I will reply "This." and kill the advisor.
  280.  
  281. That is if Aku can even have an advisor.
  282.  
  283. Verdict: FAILURE!
  284.  
  285. 47. If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for him to mature.
  286.  
  287. Actually, Aku did try this back in Jack In Africa--you'd be forgiven for not remembering that, actually. Arguably Aku was too passive about it with his effective invincibility, but he had to worry about the sword, so ultimately Aku can be granted this.
  288.  
  289. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  290.  
  291. 48. I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.
  292.  
  293. Aku effectively broke this by breaking deals with the likes of the Triceraquins, leading to Jack's continued survival.
  294.  
  295. Verdict: FAILURE!
  296.  
  297. 49. If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.
  298.  
  299. Jack is too alert for a subtle attempt to get his sword taken from like this. Of course, Aku breaks this anyway by putting a bounty on Jack's head.
  300.  
  301. Verdict: FAILURE!
  302.  
  303. 50. My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.
  304.  
  305. Aku again didn't care much about "cahm-pyoo-tohrs."
  306.  
  307. Verdict: FAILURE!
  308.  
  309. 51. If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less people-oriented position.
  310.  
  311. Aku's dungeon guards were without their own personalities anyway.
  312.  
  313. Verdict: Neutral
  314.  
  315. 52. I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about.
  316.  
  317. WHY IS THERE A CONVENIENT ALCOVE IN THE PIT OF HATE?!?!?
  318.  
  319. Verdict: FAILURE!
  320.  
  321. 53. If the beautiful princess that I capture says "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!", I will say "Oh well" and kill her.
  322.  
  323. Another "Aku never had a problem with this" point.
  324.  
  325. Verdict: Neutral
  326.  
  327. 54. I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.
  328.  
  329. Aku was the demonic being himself. Of course, he broke the second half of this with various beings and paid the price for it.
  330.  
  331. Verdict: FAILURE!
  332.  
  333. 55. The deformed mutants and odd-ball psychotics will have their place in my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.
  334.  
  335. Aku got the first part right. Of course, the second part, he didn't consider covert missions soon enough, which could have given his Elder Nahtahkoo disguise a chance at being convincing.
  336.  
  337. Verdict: Not sure
  338.  
  339. 56. My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.
  340.  
  341. "STUPID BOUNTYY HUUNNTEERRSSS!!!!!"
  342.  
  343. Verdict: FAILURE!
  344.  
  345. 57. Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owner's manual.
  346.  
  347. Once again, Aku didn't even consider using modern tech beyond the Beetle Bots, and we know how those went when we witness one try a jump it just couldn't make in the 3rd episode.
  348.  
  349. Verdict: FAILURE!
  350.  
  351. 58. If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner.
  352.  
  353. "I'LL BE BAACK, SAMURAI! YOU'LL SEEE!" *swing* "ACK!"
  354.  
  355. Seriously, how did Aku survive all the way to the finale?
  356.  
  357. Verdict: FAILURE!
  358.  
  359. 59. I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.
  360.  
  361. Aku yet again didn't care about learning to be tech savvy to make use of sentient computers regardless of intelligence.
  362.  
  363. Verdict: FAILURE!
  364.  
  365. 60. My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds, it will not be used. Note: this also applies to passwords.
  366.  
  367. Aku and advisors in the same sentence. Seriously.
  368.  
  369. Verdict: FAILURE!
  370.  
  371. 61. If my advisors ask "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?", I will not proceed until I have a response that satisfies them.
  372.  
  373. More advisor stuff. It's like Aku wants to fail the Evil Overlord List.
  374.  
  375. Verdict: FAILURE!
  376.  
  377. 62. I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.
  378.  
  379. The Pit of Hate has an alcove that Jack con conveniently use for spying on him. Guh.
  380.  
  381. Verdict: FAILURE!
  382.  
  383. 63. Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.
  384.  
  385. I don't think this ever came up.
  386.  
  387. Verdict: Neutral
  388.  
  389. 64. I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage.
  390.  
  391. Funnily enough, Aku tried this with himself. But his real problem was trying to be so fancy about killing Jack, period, not hearing about the Samurai at all.
  392.  
  393. Verdict: FAILURE!
  394.  
  395. 65. If I must have computer systems with publicly available terminals, the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The actual main control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.
  396.  
  397. More technology.
  398.  
  399. Verdict: FAILURE!
  400.  
  401. 66. My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence will trigger the alarm system.
  402.  
  403. Again.
  404.  
  405. Verdict: FAILURE!
  406.  
  407. 67. No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a full-scale emergency.
  408.  
  409. Yet again.
  410.  
  411. Verdict: FAILURE!
  412.  
  413. 68. I will spare someone who saved my life sometime in the past. This is only reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they'd better save my life again.
  414.  
  415. Aku is already invincible against anybody other than one guy who wants him finished. He can't do this to useful effect if he wanted.
  416.  
  417. Verdict: Neutral
  418.  
  419. 69. All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of the wild.
  420.  
  421. Aku just left the Cult of Aku to their own devices, which resulted in Ashi's birth. We know how things went with Ashi.
  422.  
  423. Verdict: FAILURE!
  424.  
  425. 70. When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering around a corner.
  426.  
  427. When your minions' most coordinate efforts come from Ezekiel and Josephine Clench, you clearly have a problem here.
  428.  
  429. Verdict: FAILURE!
  430.  
  431. 71. If I decide to test a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no.
  432.  
  433. I'd consider this Neutral from this never coming up, if not for Aku simply killing the likes of Demongo and Scaramouche for failures anyway. Instead...
  434.  
  435. Verdict: FAILURE!
  436.  
  437. 72. If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my unstoppable superweapon on them.
  438.  
  439. Seriously, Aku. Where were the mooks in the final battle?
  440.  
  441. Verdict: FAILURE!
  442.  
  443. 73. I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win.
  444.  
  445. Aku actually was lying so he was already doing this. Of course, Jack not only saw through the lie, but knew that Aku would realize that much as well and layered the countering deception.
  446.  
  447. Verdict: Not sure
  448.  
  449. 74. When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.
  450.  
  451. More tech and more advisor business. Aku's plans also got increasingly more obvious allowing Jack to set up countermeasures.
  452.  
  453. Verdict: FAILURE!
  454.  
  455. 75. I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time.
  456.  
  457. The Beetle Bots could have had some success if they did this. Same with the bounty hunters earlier on.
  458.  
  459. Verdict: FAILURE!
  460.  
  461. 76. If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)
  462.  
  463. Location was never really the problem for Aku, last I checked. I could be wrong though.
  464.  
  465. Verdict: Not sure
  466.  
  467. 77. If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutenant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer.
  468.  
  469. Again, Aku and advisors. Same sentence.
  470.  
  471. Verdict: FAILURE!
  472.  
  473. 78. I will not tell my Legions of Terror "And he must be taken alive!" The command will be "And try to take him alive if it is reasonably practical."
  474.  
  475. Aku generally wanted Jack dead, period. And Aku breaks this anyway by telling possessed Ashi to stop her attack on Jack to set him up for a public execution. It went as well as you expect.
  476.  
  477. Verdict: FAILURE!
  478.  
  479. 79. If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.
  480.  
  481. More. Tech.
  482.  
  483. Verdict: FAILURE!
  484.  
  485. 80. If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.
  486.  
  487. Gosh the Minions of Set gave Jack so much difficulty just to get the chance to summon Ra to defeat them in Season THREE. Imagine if they had been unsealed in Season ONE. Yeah. And there's probably other, if less blatant, examples too.
  488.  
  489. Verdict: FAILURE!
  490.  
  491. 81. If I am fighting with the hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw.
  492.  
  493. Nigh invulnerability. No problems here.
  494.  
  495. Verdict: Neutral
  496.  
  497. 82. I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.
  498.  
  499. I don't think this came up in letter, but Aku shot his eye beams at Jack while standing on an unstable tree stump. Jack reflected the eyebeams at the tree stump's foundation and down came Aku.
  500.  
  501. Verdict: FAILURE!
  502.  
  503. 83. If I'm eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.
  504.  
  505. Never came up, and wouldn't have been needed anyway due to Aku's nigh invulnerability.
  506.  
  507. Verdict: Neutral
  508.  
  509. 84. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.
  510.  
  511. AHAHAHAHAHA! *OH!* ***GOD!!!!*** So during the final battle, Aku goes off to fight with Jack's allies, while leaving Jack (male) to Ashi (female). *OOPS!!!!*
  512.  
  513. *****I SWEAR TO GOD I WAS NEVER EVEN THINKING ABOUT THIS BEFORE REACHING THIS RULE IN WRITING MY RESPONSES TO EACH OF THE EVIL OVERLORD LIST RULES!*****
  514.  
  515. Verdict: FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE! ABJECT USELESS FAILURE!
  516.  
  517. 85. I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e. g. "Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse." Instead it will be more along the lines of "Push the button."
  518.  
  519. Oh, you're rescuing me from what would otherwise be certain death in a quest to gather multiple powerful objects that Aku would turn against me if given the chance? Thanks, Elder Nahtahkoo! Oh, and don't mind me, I'll secretly remove a key portion of those objects' power when you're not looking. Something about the person who pointed me to you being the waitress spy underneath the cloak...
  520.  
  521. Verdict: FAILURE!
  522.  
  523. 86. I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded.
  524.  
  525. Aku. Technology. LEARN IT!
  526.  
  527. Verdict: FAILURE!
  528.  
  529. 87. My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.
  530.  
  531. This never came up.
  532.  
  533. Verdict: Neutral
  534.  
  535. 88. If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.
  536.  
  537. Surprisingly, Aku got THIS right. TOO right, right, Scaramouche?
  538.  
  539. Verdict: Not sure
  540.  
  541. 89. After I captures the hero's superweapon, I will not immediately disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him.
  542.  
  543. How many times has Aku broken this? Even without the final episode.
  544.  
  545. Verdict: FAILURE!
  546.  
  547. 90. I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door.
  548.  
  549. I don't think this came up.
  550.  
  551. Verdict: Neutral
  552.  
  553. 91. I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished. It might actually be important.
  554.  
  555. Aku initially told Scaramouche to buzz off and then to be sure that Jack no longer had his sword without noticing that Scaramouche went through a long and painful, if well deserved, journey to deliver the news, and then had the nerve to kill him for apparently lying to him. Scaramouche could have been helpful as an assassin or, Heaven forbid, an advisor during the final battle.
  556.  
  557. Verdict: FAILURE!
  558.  
  559. 92. If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say this his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will like ly return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)
  560.  
  561. This couldn't work on Jack if Aku tried. This is, however, because Aku is an unrepentant sadist.
  562.  
  563. Verdict: FAILURE!
  564.  
  565. 93. If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.
  566.  
  567. With the Triceraquin business, Aku wanted Jack to suffer a long and painful death by drowning. Aku couldn't just cut his temporary losses in his sadism for a permanent victory. No, he had to just mock the apparent futility of the Triceraquins' efforts actively too. The Triceraquins resist and eventually bail Jack, who drives Aku away from them and lives to fight another day.
  568.  
  569. Verdict: FAILURE!
  570.  
  571. 94. When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.
  572.  
  573. Aku got this right, if only because his personality wouldn't have allowed that much.
  574.  
  575. Verdict: SUCCESS!
  576.  
  577. 95. My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells the guard it's an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead of opening up the cell for a look.
  578.  
  579. Since Jack is honorable, I don't think this ever came up.
  580.  
  581. Verdict: Neutral
  582.  
  583. 96. My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the control panel on the outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside opens the door, not vice versa.
  584.  
  585. More. Tech.
  586.  
  587. Verdict: FAILURE!
  588.  
  589. 97. My dungeon cells will not be furnished with objects that contain reflective surfaces or anything that can be unravelled.
  590.  
  591. I forget if this comes up.
  592.  
  593. Verdict: Not sure
  594.  
  595. 98. If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. However if circumstance have forced them together against their will and they spend all their time bickering and criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when they are saving each others' lives at which point there are hints of sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.
  596.  
  597. Ashi came into play too late for this to matter, but Aku didn't want to care about this anyway due to being interested only in his cruelty.
  598.  
  599. Verdict: FAILURE!
  600.  
  601. 99. Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1. 45Mb in size.
  602.  
  603. Yet. More. Tech.
  604.  
  605. Verdict: FAILURE!
  606.  
  607. 100. Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.
  608.  
  609. Aku didn't even care what his subjects thought unless it benefitted him in his sadism and nigh invulnerability. He actually simply wanted to see their pain. This gave Jack no shortage of invaluable allies.
  610.  
  611. Verdict: FAILURE!
  612.  
  613.  
  614. Final Tally:
  615. -FAILURE: 70 (+11)/100
  616. -SUCCESS: 8/100
  617. -Neutral: 15/100
  618. -Unsure: 7/100
  619.  
  620. Summary: between all the failure to consider learning about technology or the world's wonders, the glaring abuse pulled on even loyal minions who would otherwise be critical advisors, the refusal to take anybody but Jack seriously enough, and the general sadism leading to doing things like try to kill Jack in overthought ways, Aku proves to be such a failure of the Evil Overlord List that it transcends his borderline complete invincibility and millenia of intergalactic tyranny. Even without the padding on two points, Aku fails so many points that he becomes a bigger example, literally and figeratively, than Lord Voldemort in being a counterexample of the Evil Overlord List.
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