Randy Credico on Fred Dicker (07/29/2016)

Supplemental document for: "Theory that Roger Stone's back channel to Wikileaks was Randy Credico", link: https://wakelet.com/wake/2d352ae9-febe-44a1-a7bb-51674a2e4bf5

Randy Credico on "Live from the State Capitol Hosted by Fred Dicker", broadcast date: July 29, 2016. Excerpt runs from 30:36 to the end of the file.

File link: http://www.mediafire.com/file/y8yxt6tvqt14i85/LFTSC729161.mp3

FRED DICKER
This is Randy Credico now at the Post Media Center, getting psyched up for his big event tonight as the chief spokesman for the Seneca County, well, he's a...chief entertainer at the Seneca County Republican...

RANDY CREDICO
Seneca? No, it's the Cayuga County.

DICKER
Cayuga County, I'm sorry.

CREDICO
This is Jeff Herrick...is a...[cross talk] apparently, a good man. Yes. He's a good man, because I know he got me a nice room today, because we are going to stay for a few extra hours. But we're looking forward to it. We just drove up from New York. We're here to say hello, and then we're going to go on Highway 90. And we're doing this at some country club there.

DICKER
What-

CREDICO
This could be interesting, Fred. Here, you know, Nixon went to China? This is China going to Nixon.

DICKER
What community is this going to be?

CREDICO
[does Nixon] Uh, this is going to be at a place. Somewhere...in uh, Auburn. This is the home of uh, Harriet Tubman, and the home of my favorite Republican, which is William Seward. I love William Seward. I know all about him. I've read everything about him. You have a guy on the show. Talking about him. William Seward. And I'm sure Jeff Ward does all the time. And blames slavery on the Democrats. He's right. My fellow Americans, let me make it perfectly clear. That's what I'll do. This is my last conference. [DICKER laughs] I will not be back in Cayuga County because they're not going to have Randy Credico to kick around anymore. [goes out of Nixon] I got a great guitar player, you know, I got my therapy dog. We're going to have a great time-

DICKER
Your guitar player is Andrés Rieloff?

CREDICO
Rieloff. Yeah. From Chile. Chile.

DICKER
He's been up here before.

CREDICO
He's worked at The Hollow.

DICKER
Okay.

CREDICO
Right? The Hollow, he works with me at uh...

DICKER
How about we just take a break now and let Andrés play a tune or two.

[cross talk about Rieloff playing]

CREDICO
Yeah. It's music Friday.

DICKER
This is live at the Post Media Center.

[music intermission]

DICKER
Very nice, Andrés.

CREDICO
[does Andrew Cuomo] I'm a winner and a loser, huh Fred? He's the winner and I'm the loser. What's the Washington Post...if Joe [Percoco] were around now, I'd put a hit on the guy [reference to scandals surround Percoco, a Cuomo henchman who is currently facing federal bribery charges]. Where is Joe, is he there in Philly?

DICKER
Joe Percoco?

CREDICO
Yeah.

DICKER
He has not been seen since Preet Bharara's subpoena's been served. [cross talk of DICKER and CREDICO's Cuomo imitation]

CREDICO
[as Cuomo] I'm trying to figure out who he is.

DICKER
-some distant memory of him somewhere in your past?

CREDICO
Yes. You remember Andrés Rieloff, so, [does Clinton] by the way, did you like Bill Clinton? Bill Clinton was there, and he spoke, and he got all the applause.

DICKER
I thought he did a pretty good job. What did you think of it? He left a few things out of the narrative, but-

CREDICO
[as Clinton] Once upon a time, there was this girl, who turned out to be a real vicious older woman, and a thief, and created an organization for me and my daughter, and we ripped off the world.

DICKER
Now, that would have been a speech.

CREDICO
If he had just told the truth.

DICKER
How about- did you catch him when he talked about seeing, uh, Hillary, as a young...he kept calling her a girl. That offended some people, but then he talked about having certain thoughts about her. I mean, it was clearly a sexual allusion which I thought was-

CREDICO
[as Clinton] Well, she was a hot looking chick back then, that's what he basically said. Now all the hot looking chicks are over there with Bernie. I got Madeleine Albright with me, and this woman, this is horrible. Her and Donna Brazile, and uh-

DICKER
Did you hear Rachel Maddow? She was offended by Bill Clinton, Rachel Maddow?

CREDICO
Aw, who cares. You know what she said last night? I don't watch her, I watch CNN, alright? So...because I can't take those guys. [Chris] Matthews...they're all like, uh, amen corner, the amen quarter.

DICKER
Yeah, they're in the tank. [cross talk] It's not journalism.

CREDICO
-democratic headquarters. Or Hillary headquarters, to be more specific. Her...uh, what were we talking...Chuck Todd, was named in this DNC thing [the DNC emails]. So, Chuck Fraud. The worst, man. David Gregory, I'd rather watch him on CNN than Chuck Fraud on MSNBC. He's the worst. Absolute the worst. [does a voice that I guess is Credico's imitation of Chuck Todd] The worst, Fred, he's the worst. [back from an attempt at an imitation of Chuck Todd] So, Rachel Maddow said that they put all the lesser knowns, with no energy, between seven and eight. She said Andrew Cuomo, all these lesser knowns, without any charisma, she said that! Last night! Did you hear it?!

DICKER
No, I didn't. Did she say specifically Cuomo-

CREDICO
Yes! Cuomo! She says these guys have no energy or charisma. The four people that were on between seven and eight, now that that's over, without the energy, the energy less seven o'clock hour, we're going to get to the big people here at eight, specifically, and then you had like, who- they ain't great speakers either, but that's how low, lowly, they [inaudible because of cross talk] Andrew Cuomo, he was just horrible.

DICKER
Something happened earlier in the week, I'm sure you saw it, when they had a comedian up on stage, and I think it was in prime time.

CREDICO
Yeah.

DICKER
And they had Sarah Silverman, and all of a sudden on the twitter feed, I see you going crazy, attacking her. Do you know her?

CREDICO
Yeah, I was pissed- Yeah, I know her very well. I've known her for twenty two years.

DICKER
What the-

CREDICO
No, because she totally sold out. What can I tell you? She's telling people like me [goes into Sanders] telling the Bernie supporters out there, that you guys are being ridiculous. I don't think I was being ridiculous, I spent a lot of time helping the guy out. And exposing Hillary. So I've known her. [goes out of Sanders] The thing is, she's read one book in her life, and I gave it to her. It's by Galeano [Faces and Masks: https://openroadmedia.com/ebook/Faces-and-Masks/9781480481411 ]. I gave it to her. And I said, "You should read more often." So I give this book in '92, and Galeano's writing about the Americas, right? The history of the Americas from one B.C. up to now. And he's got little vignettes all the way through. And one of them's on Jane Franklin. Ben Franklin's sister, who, like, raised twenty three kids. And she was a woman, uh, of the ages, instead of the ages, the guy said. She's like- He really identified her as the great one in the family. While he was flying kites, and having affairs in Paris, this one was raising her sister's kids, because she died...early, and she had twenty three kids at one time, parents she took through, and she was a real remarkable Mother Theresa of that time, and so I give her the book, and the other day, she's quoted- She says, "I like to read a lot. You know, Jane Franklin-" This was the one book, and I pointed it out to her, she acted like she discovered it. She was in an interview. I know she doesn't read. But I was furious. But I deleted all of those things. I was really pissed at her for a while.

DICKER
Randy, what about the Sanders people, though? They really had to tamp them down, and there was some concern by the Democrats about disruptions last night during Mrs. Clinton's speech - there weren't - but what do you think about them, from what you know about the Sanders' people, are they going to get into line now, and support her-

CREDICO
Nah nah, there's not a chance. Some of them will. They'll go with Stein, some will go with Gary Johnson, because Johnson looks like he'll get to the debates [debate admission is based on poll number support, and Johnson would ultimately have insufficient numbers] And...but some of them won't because he supports TPP. The other...and Trump will get some too. Trump will get some too. You know. I dunno. We'll see. I think- I still say he's- I agree with your previous host here. He will win. I think Trump is going to win.

DICKER
I want to talk to you about what you're going to be talking with Republicans tonight about, I think it'll be pretty interesting. But I thought I'd ask Andrés Rieloff to play a little tune for us, and then I think what we'll do, and I'll just give Gideon a heads up, we have to do this...when Andrés is on I think we'll take a quick break, and then we'll come back, and talk about [CREDICO: Yeah!] tonight's event.

[musical interlude]

DICKER
That's Andrés Rieloff, we're here at the Post Media Center, with Randy Credico. And with Andrés. Thank you very much, this is Fred Dicker, of course, we're going to take a break right now and be right back.

[commercial break]

DICKER
I was looking at the Auburn newspaper and there's a story a few days ago, headlined, "Political Satirist Randy Credico To Headline Cayuga County GOP Fundraiser July 29" [link: http://auburnpub.com/news/local/political-satirist-randy-credico-to-headline-cayuga-county-gop-fundraiser/article_0c253f9c-4b9c-11e6-aa52-5f4b7fffeac7.html] and it's going to be tonight, 6:30 to 8:30, I guess, is the event is at the Highland Country Club, on Franklin Street Road, in Sennett, which must be right outside of wherever you're going to be getting off the thruway. It's an expensive event! Kinda like going to a Cuomo fundraiser, the cost is twenty dollars per person, thirty five dollars per couple, with finger foods, a cash bar, and desserts. They gotta do what they can out there, to boost the Cayuga County Republican-

CREDICO
Yeah, we hope they-

DICKER
It'll be great.

CREDICO
Hey listen, I'm gonna have fun. Look, I'm a Democrat, but we have one thing in common: those there, and I, don't like Hillary Clinton. And we don't like Andrew Cuomo. So, you know, those are the two-

DICKER
Plus you like comedy. You got that in common.

CREDICO
I got plenty of comedy. [voice breaks, like he's about to cry]

DICKER
No, I'm just saying, I think they have a sense of humor. Jeff Herrick, the chairman-

CREDICO
[as Clinton] Jeff Herrick seems like he does. I hope they're gonna like myself as Bill Clinton, because I plan to hammer that guy. And I plan to do something on his wife. She's the worst speaker, Fred. I sit there cringing the whole time, I'm sweating bullets, because I know she can't read that- [no longer Clinton] She's like one of those, what do you call it, one of those uh lawn sprinklers-

DICKER
Lawn sprinklers?

CREDICO
You know the ones that go like this, [imitates the automated bursts of a rotating sprinkler, and does a much less funny version of the "Democratic Voice" that people know from Chapo Trap House] "I. BELIEVE. THAT IT IS TIME FOR US...TO ALL GET TO...GETHER...AND LET'S...TRY...TO DO...WHAT WE. CAN. DO." And then she does this thing with her head going up and down, like a bobble doll, man, she's just the worst speaker I've ever seen in my life. [does Cuomo] Next to Andrew Cuomo. I'm the worst speaker. I'm number one. Me, I'm the worst. I'm the number one. No worse than me, Fred, that makes me number one at being bad.

DICKER
Put your analyst hat on, Randy. What did you make of Trump, Donald Trump, as a speaker?

CREDICO
He's a great speaker. Great off the top of his head. He's-

DICKER
He's got a lot of humor in what he says. That too.

CREDICO
That press conference that he had the other day, you know, look, I kinda agree, let's fight ISIS, let's try to be friendly with these superpowers, I don't wanna go- I'd rather be friendly with a superpower than go to bat-

DICKER
What did you think of how the press savaged him? He said, "Look, if the Russians have her hidden emails, I hope they make them public!"

CREDICO
That's right! That would help out the FBI!

DICKER
He didn't say they should go in and invade her computer...plus, her server's already down, so they couldn't get it...and they don't need him...

CREDICO
It was...

DICKER
-to tell them to go get her stuff, but yet the press was all over him.

CREDICO
Yeah! They made it look like he was Alger Hiss at that point, you know what I mean? So, it's-

DICKER
Alger Hiss was a good man. If you ask the New York Times they're still fighting that battle-

CREDICO
Not Alger Hiss, Chambers I meant. I meant Whittaker Chambers. I don't know which one is the bad guy.

DICKER
It was Alger Hiss without a doubt.

CREDICO
Okay. So- [cross talk] just let me make out, he's the Rosenbergs, whatever you want to say. Or he's...who is the traitor, the one who actually- [reaching to make a reference to Klaus Fuchs, possibly]

DICKER
They make him into Joe McCarthy. Of course, Trump worked with Roy Cohn.

CREDICO
I- Listen, he didn't do anything wrong at that press conference. Highly entertaining, after three or four days of this terrible convention. Alright? There were a couple of good speeches there, but it was so uh, pre-packaged. The whole thing. Alright? You got the Sanders people, they kept- They threw them outside, they were not good, because I heard this morning there were people that had credentials, they wouldn't let them back in. This was not like Chicago, of 1968, and the public would have liked to have seen them really air it out.

DICKER
And the press oughta be pleased that Trump makes himself available, he's on TV all the time, he answers questions-

CREDICO
He did an hour and ten minutes!

DICKER
-anything he wants, and then you pointed out that Hillary, like Andrew Cuomo, rarely if ever, has a press conference.

CREDICO
You know why? Because they can't answer questions. They are political hacks. He deals with the public on a one-to-one basis, every day. He speaks all to them, he gives these motivational speeches, he's a great public speaker! He's great off the top of his head! Whether- That doesn't mean that I love him. I just say he's a great, great- he's really good off the cuff. Impromptu. There's nobody better than him.

DICKER
Well it's going to be more interesting, and fascinating, then the debates between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump. She has to be very nervous about that.

CREDICO
He'll destroy her. He will destroy her. The same way Jerry Brown nearly destroyed, and I found it really ironic, him coming up the other day, and endorsing Hillary, and saying great things, because he's the one who really hammered Hillary _and_ Bill...Bill unraveled, did you ever see the, you know, the video, of Jerry Brown [goes into what I guess is Jerry Brown] Jerry Brown, she is one of the most corrupt individuals, whether it was the Rose Law Firm, she was corrupt when she was, uh, with uh...with uh...when you were governor...corrupt with Wal-Mart, she's one of the most corrupt, Whitewater, Webster Hubbell, [leaves behind the Jerry Brown attempt] all- he just hammered, he went nuts, and Bill Clinton unraveled. But, uh, Trump, great off the top, he's going to destroy her. Because she can't...like I said, she cannot speak. If you were to say to her, "Hillary, my name is Randy Credico, how are you doing," she would look at a cue card and say, "NICE. TO. MEET YOU." Right? She can't do it.

DICKER
Who do you think you're going to vote for?

CREDICO
Well, it's going to be one of the three, but it's not going to be- It's going to be one of the three, but not a Dem. I'm not voting for a Democrat. Three people I can choose from: Jill Stein, you got- which a lot of my friends are going to be voting for, uh, Gary Johnson, who I got an award with, in Albuquerque, in 2001, from the Drug Policy Alliance, he's a very nice guy. I've got great footage, I should give it to him, of him meeting with a bunch of women whose kids were in prison. From Tulia [Texas], and from New York. He was spectacular.

DICKER
Very famous, and very disturbing event that Randy was in the middle of, did "Sixty Minutes" do a piece on that?

CREDICO
Yes. No no no, they were- And I spoke to her the other day, Jamie Floyd, from "20/20".

DICKER
They were being set up by the police down there.

CREDICO
By one guy. One guy. And all the cops hated him. This was just one guy, he's a narcotics agent, who had a Klan background, he was horrible, he'd been fired, and every cop hated him. Somehow, he went undercover and after two years, half the Black population, supposing [sic] a city of three thousand, was selling cocaine. So they all got out. And it's because I did the "Bill O'Reilly Show" that really helped. I did "O'Reilly Show", that was a big factor, Bob Herbert, and O'Reilly. O'Reilly at the end. Now: that being said, I got a minute and a half left-

DICKER
Yeah, Randy-

CREDICO
Maybe you'll do some of that-

DICKER
Andrés? Or no?

CREDICO
Buh duh bop bop bop- You know the one- [cross talk]

DICKER
Andrés, can you- We understand the Reverend Al Sharpton may be stopping by in a second too, can you do any kind of accompaniment for the Reverend Al Sharpton?

CREDICO
[does Sharpton] I think you should play something religious, like "Amazing Grace". *sings* "A-mazing grace-" I need a twenty dollar bill, Fred. [cash register noise] If I'm gonna finish this song. Andrés, I'll give you a twenty dollar bill, if you give me ninety percent as your agent. I wanna hear some more. _I see_, the other day, why wasn't I up there, being the preacher last night, why is it some other Black guy, instead of me? I would have torn the house down, particularly, I paid the price, everyone knows, I sold out. And you can sell out too, but make sure they give you a twenty dollar bills, and not fives, not tens, not singles, we don't want no Washingtons, we want twenty dollar bills.

DICKER
Thanks for listening, live from the State Capitol.