fucking pizza

??/M/6'0. He's tall and lanky with shoulder length hair dyed a dark blue shade. Prone to making snippy comments about pretty much anything. He simply adores bad puns and also has a passion for arachnids. He wears a shirt that says "Mystery is my boyfriend" which often leads people to believe that he prefers the "company" of men. Really it's just an old sweater he stole from his cousin once upon a blue moon. Most of his clothes are stolen goods, actually. He shoplifts a lot. And he's quite good at it too, with nimble fingers and swift feet. Although he's most likely a cleptomaniac with a house full of weird trinkets that aren't actually his. What's he supposed to do with all those things? No idea. He just likes nabbing them. Kind of like some sort of moronic magpie with a bad sense of humor.