Revised Mission Statement

At Jefferson High School, Dr. Glazer believes:

1. Critical thinking and problem solving skills are vital in avoiding whatever BS our teachers want their students to do.
2. Students learn best in a community where academic disciplines are integrated, giving teachers more opportunity for nefarious crap like the IBET program.
3. Global interdependence compels us to understand the languages, systems and diverse cultures of the 57% Asian students and 40 Hispanic students at our school.
4. Literature, music and the arts are things I need to acknowledge in the mission statement, but not when I'm writing next year's budget.
5. The methods of science can be safely ignored when faced with a lab report at 2:49 A.M.
6. Research stems from a combination of fundamental knowledge, individual creativity and a desire for sweet, sweet Siemens grant money.
7. Effective communication is often the only difference between a good idea and several new enemies.
8. Collaborative learning, athletics, and extracurricular activities make great press photos.
9. Responsibility and integrity are words nobody gives a damn about, but I had better put here if I have any hope of receiving funds for the dumb renovations.
10. Learning ends three hours after the test.