items.StartItem("yeah", "weapon_base", "base_anim") -- Not sure how I should do this (if it's a neat way)

    ITEM.WorldModel = "models/weapons/w_pistol.mdl"
    ITEM.ViewModel = "models/weapons/v_pistol.mdl"

    function ITEM:Initialize()
        self.DermaMenuOptions = {} -- Don't really need this, it's just for constant reloading (I'm runstringing this shared) so the menu doesn't stack

        if CLIENT then
            self:AddSimpleOption("Explode", "Explode") -- First argument is the label in the menu, second is the function name
            self:AddCustomOption(function(menu) -- This one's for adding custom vgui elements to the menu
                local slider = vgui.Create("DSlider");
                slider:SetTrapInside(true);
                slider:SetImage("vgui/slider");
                slider:SetLockY(0.5);
                slider:SetSize(100,13);
                slider:SetSlideX(1);
                Derma_Hook(slider,"Paint","Paint","NumSlider");
                slider.TranslateValues=function(p,x,y)
                    self:CallOption("Spawn Random", "MakeEnt", table.Random({"npc_manhack", "npc_rollermine"})) -- You can do anything here, but I want to spam PrimaryAttack for fun.
                    return x,y;
                end
                menu:AddPanel(slider)
            end)

            self:AddSimpleOption("Fire Primary", "PrimaryAttack", "OH YES")
            self:AddSimpleOption("Fire Secondary", "SecondaryAttack")
        else
            self:AllowOption("Explode", "Explode")
            self:AllowOption("Fire Secondary", "SecondaryAttack")
            self:AllowOption("Fire Primary", "PrimaryAttack")
            self:AllowOption("Spawn Random", "MakeEnt")

            if not self:IsWeapon() then
                self:SetModel(  self.WorldModel )
                self:PhysicsInit( SOLID_VPHYSICS )
                self:SetMoveType( MOVETYPE_VPHYSICS )
                self:SetSolid( SOLID_VPHYSICS )
                self:PhysWake()
            end
        end

    end

    local sound = Sound( "Metal.SawbladeStick" )

    if SERVER then

        function ITEM.HOOK:PlayerSay(player, text) -- I know there's a clientside chat hook. I'm only doing this to show UserMessages
            self:SendUserMessage("text", player:Nick() .. ": " .. text)
        end

        function ITEM:MakeEnt(class)
            self.Owner:MuzzleFlash()
            self.Owner:SetAnimation( PLAYER_ATTACK1 )

            local tr = self:GetTrace() -- This returns GetEyeTrace if it's held, and a custom trace if it's not held

            local ent = ents.Create( class )
            ent:SetPos( tr.HitPos )
            ent:SetAngles( tr.HitNormal:Angle() )
            ent:Spawn()
            ent:SetCollisionGroup(COLLISION_GROUP_WEAPON)

            timer.Simple(1, function() ent:Remove() end)
        end

        function ITEM:PrimaryAttack(ohyes)
            print(ohyes)
            self:MakeEnt("npc_manhack")
        end

        function ITEM:SecondaryAttack()
            self:MakeEnt("npc_rollermine")
        end

        function ITEM:Explode()
            local data = EffectData()
            data:SetOrigin(self:GetPos())
            util.Effect("explosion", data)
            self:Remove()
        end

        function ITEM:Touch(ply)
            if not ply:IsPlayer() then return end
            self:SendUserMessage("touch", ply)
        end

        function ITEM:OnTakeDamage(info)
            info:SetDamageForce(info:GetDamageForce()*1000)
            self:TakePhysicsDamage(info)
        end

    else

        function ITEM:PrimaryAttack()
            self:SendWeaponAnim( ACT_VM_PRIMARYATTACK )
            self.Owner:MuzzleFlash()
            self.Owner:SetAnimation( PLAYER_ATTACK1 )
        end

        ITEM.SecondaryAttack = ITEM.PrimaryAttack

        function ITEM:ReceiveUserMessage(key, value)
            if key == "text" then self.text = value end
            if key == "touch" then chat.AddText(HSVToColor(math.random(360), 1,1), "CAUSE EVERYTIME WE TOUCH "..value:Nick().." GETS THIS FEELING") end
        end

        function ITEM.HOOK:HUDPaint()
            if not self.text then return end
            local position = self:GetPos():ToScreen()
            draw.DrawText(self.text, "Default", position.x, position.y, color_white, TEXT_ALIGN_LEFT)
        end

    end

items.EndItem()

if SERVER then
    items.EasyCreate("yeah", nero.GetPlayer("caps"), true)
end