View difference between Paste ID: xiwJp3sk and N3Vk1MaZ

 >Sitting in your free apartme....cell.. You look back on what got you sent to pone prison in the first place
 
 >Your old pocketknife
 
 >Turns out, weapons of ANY kind are strictly forbidden. Even the Royal Guards' spearheads are made of soft rubber, the shafts are made of solid styrofoam.
 
 >Everyone thought you were trying to kill the Purple Acorn when you tried to show her metal from your world.
 >Wasn't your fault everything from your world was anti-magic
 >Wasn't your fault she didn't realize it was a blade
 >Wasn't your fault she tried to pick it up with her mouth
 >Stupid smart-horse
 >And now everyone is scared of you and won't let you near anything sharper than a beach ball
 >Serious debate went into whether you could have a bendy straw with your chocolate milk
 >They finally said you could have a sippy straw but needed a chaperone to watch you in the mess hall at all times
 >Enter Cookies n Cream
 
 >Meals aren't so bad. Pony equivalent of restraining a dangerous prisoner is giving them the 'quiet time' necklace. Anyone wearing it isn't supposed to move quickly or meanly.
 >Doesn't work on you, of course
 >Shouldn't even work on the other inmates
 >shit isn't even enchanted
 >just a string with beads on it that spell out 'quiet time' 'happy quiet' 'shush good' and 'calm friendly'
 >You don't act out in the Mess anyway... that would get Cookies in trouble too.
 >Speaking of meals, Cookies should be here any minute to-
 >"Hello there Anon, are you ready for lunch?"
 >The 'quiet time' necklace is hanging from the emergency churro in her belt. In an emergency, the tasty treat is used to calm roudy inmates.
 "Yes please, I'm starved."
 >"Maybe if you didn't skip snack time, you wouldn't be so hungry. It really worries me that you don't eat enough"
 >aw.. she sounds so concerned for your health
 "Maybe I would join snack time if you served something other than hay biscuits and milk."
 >"Is there something wrong with hay biscuits?"
 "Humans can't eat hay" you say with a laugh
 >Cookies face shifts from mild concern, to realization, to abject horror
 >"SWEET CELESTIA'S SUNDRESS, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ANYONE SOONER?!"
 >whoops, poor thing is having a panic attack.
 >
 >
 >She seems to be hyperventilating now
 >If this keeps up much longer, you'll be late for lunch
 >
 >Someone else will take the last pudding cup!
 >You've got to calm her down somehow!
 
 >Best start by letting her know you aren't upset at the lack of edibles during snack time.
 "It's alright Cookies, I'm a big guy who doesn't need snack time"
 >You do, however, need that pudding cup with lunch.
 >"BUT WE ALL MISTREATED YOU! THIS IS PRISON BRUTALITY ON A SCALE NEVER SEEN BEFORE!"
 >she is actually crying. Why is she crying? How are you supposed to get that pudding cup if your chaperone is crying?! You can't go to Mess without her... You'll have pudding privilages revoked for the day!
 >Time for the big guns
 "Hey, I'm ok. You're ok. No need to cry" you say as you gently pat her mane
 >pony hair is soft
 >how can anything be this soft
 >Hey, it seems to be working! She stopped hyperventilating!
 
 Be Cookies n Cream
 >What? petting? what? by prisoner? what?
 >what?
 >WHAT?
 >WHY IS THIS HAPPENI-
 >ooo that's nice
 >Oh biscuits! forgot to breathe!
 
 Be Anon
 >Cookies takes a few deep breaths as you continue petting her mane.
 >Hrm...she still looks spooked.
 
 >Time for the grand finale
 >You kneel down right next to Cookies and pull her in for a tight hug
 >The Fluffy is strong with this one
 >fluff for days
 >you continue to pet her back as you hold her
 "I'll take the EUC (Emergency Use Churro) as a snack if you want."
 >BAM! Now you get churro WITH your pudding
 >if there even is still pudding
 >Please let there still be chocolate vanilla swirl
 >why isn't Cookies answering you?
 
 Be Cookies
 >Anon is HUGGING you!
 >Right here in the open!
 >And by Luna's Lungs, was that petting /nice/
 >Those 'fingers' of his.. wow
 >huh, wait, did he say something?
 "Mrglurmph"
 >turns out you can't really speak
 >probably because of the petting and having your face smushed into his chest (and that smell!)
 >"I'll take that as a yes. Now, lets get to the Mess."
 >Why did the petting stop?
 >Why did he stop?
 >Why is your EUC missing?
 >
 >
 >Oh yeah, Anon said something about taking it.
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Cookies seems much better, or at least calmer.
 >daw...she has a little thousand yard stare.
 >she'll be fine
 >the pudding though...
 >putting on the necklace, you step out of your cell
 "Cookies, you coming?"
 >She seems to snap out of her trance and quietly nods, following you to the Mess
 
 
 Still be Anon
 >There is still some pudding left!
 >AW YISS
 >NOTHING goes with pudding like churros
 >Cookies hasn't said a word since leaving your cell
 >Must still be worried about you
 >Daw
 >Welp, better show her that you are eating enough. You load down your tray with fruits, veggies, a few pistachios for good measure, and the holy grail of the Mess hall
 >Pudding
 >nothing, absolutely /nothing/ goes with pudding like churros.
 >and since you aren't allowed to have a spoon, either Cookies has to use a spoon to feed you or things get messy
 >Messy in the Mess
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >You've been through some real serious caca in the past
 >The great salt lick riot
 >Not enough snacks to go around that day
 >Lot of good officers had their feelings hurt that day. That day is actually the reason guardpones carry EUCs.
 >Never in your years of service have you even HEARD of an inmate petting or hugging ANYONE
 >Let alone a /guard/
 >Out in the open
 >And there he was, sucking the pudding off his churro right next to you like nothing happened
 >a realization hits you
 >he OWNS you. You let your guard down with him and are paying the price. The firm, lovingly tight price...
 >Part of you absolutely /hates/ that you let it happen. Anon probably planned it from the start, skipping snack on purpose to trick you!
 >Part of you, deep inside, can't stop crying
 >Part of you, even deeper down...liked it
 >Anon notices your gaze on him and gives you a grin, a spot of pudding coloring the tip of his nose
 
 >you shudder
 
 Be Anon
 >You notice Cookies staring at you and shoot her a grin.
 >Huh? Did she just shiver? She must be cold
 >You put down the 1/8 of churro left and scoot close to her. She's had it rough, and got you to Mess in time for pudding, she can use some of your body heat.
 >you give her a quick one-armed hug as she shivers again, then return to your meal
 
 Be Cookies n Cream
 >It is night, day of the incident
 >Can't sleep
 >You were tough
 >You were brave
 >That was the reason you were Anon's chaperone. You were the only one who was brave enough to get anywhere near that monster
 >He had waited, scheming, to lure you out and /hug/ you!
 >You couldn't let things stand this way
 >There was no way you were gonna let him make you his cuddle-buddy
 >
 >
 >
 >You...were going to make him YOUR cuddle-buddy! Show that 'human' who is the boss!
 >Smiling a dark smile, you turn over and begin to fall asleep.
 >You were going to need your strength tomorrow...for cuddles
 
 
 Be Anon
 >It's late morning
 >Birds chirp outside
 >People are laughing and talking outside your cell
 >DAMN this world that doesn't know the meaning of sleeping in!
 >With a sigh, you give up on any more sleep and, as you make your way to your private bathroom you notice a letter that had been pushed under the door to your cell.
 "Hrm, musta been delivered while I was asleep..."
 >Picking up the letter, you notice the Royal Seal.
 >curiously, you open the letter and read
 >.
 >..
 >...
 >Long story short, Luna attempted to enter your brain while you slept.
 "What is this? 'You have been deemed mentally unstable'?! This is bullshit!"
 >"LANGUAGE, Anon! You just lost your complimentary chocolate tonight"
 >Stupid overly-sensitive colorful equines
 >The letter also says that your sentence will be extended until Luna declares you mentally sound.
 
 >Snack time in the big house
 >You remembered to ask for something other than Hay biscuits, for poor Cookies' sake.
 >You got animal crackers and juice
 >Score
 >You've been biting off the heads and saving the rest for later. Old habit from when you were a kid.
 >you learned from the snack pony that Luna has been 'sick' ever since her 'expedition' into your brain.
 >serves her right for invading your privacy like that. Still, better if she hadn't gone in at all.
 >Now there is no hope of getting out of here...But honestly, why would you want to?
 >The other inmates are nice, and the guards mostly let you do your own thing. Even if everyone is afraid of you.
 >"Hello there prisoner 007"
 "Oh!"
 >damnit, dropped a lion/scorpion thing cracker.
 "Morning, Cookies, you startled me!"
 >She doesn't usually show up this early in the day. odd.
 >"Good to see you eating during snack time"
 "Yea, I remembered how upset you were yesterday when you learned I wasn't eating."
 >Something seems...off about her. Her tone is different from usual
 "You alright Cookies?"
 
 Be Cookies
 >"You alright Cookies?"
 "What do you mean? I'm perfectly fine."
 >You couldn't let him catch on to your plan for revenge cuddles
 >You have to beat him at his own game
 >If the other inmates found out, none would take you seriously
 >If the Warden found out, you'd lose your job
 >The only way to reclaim your pride is to cuddle this mean monkey into submission! Lunch is still hours away, and the other prisoners in this block are all at the arts and crafts station
 >You have all the time in the world
 >Step one: Make him drop his guard
 "I've been wondering, do you have a special somepony?"
 >"I don't have a- wait, what?"
 >It's working, he's completely off-guard!
 >He'll regret dropping his guard around THIS guard!
 >Time to create an opening
 "Hey, what's that over there?!"
 >NAILED IT
 
 Be Anon
 "huh?"
 >As you turn to follow Cookies' gaze, you are suddenly pushed to the ground
 >"You like hugging and petting upset ponies? Try being tickle hugged!"
 >Cookies is on top of you, legs clenched around your sides pinning one arm down. She starts to wriggle her tail around under your shirt.
 "Stop! I'm ticklish!"
 >She doesn't stop
 >there is a mad look in her eyes
 >A look you've seen before back home
 >Your friend, Incognito, would look like this when initiating a tickle or pillow fight
 >She wasn't going to stop unless you tickled her into submission
 
 
 >Challenge accepted
 >With one arm pinned down, the other one trapped underneath you, you can't reach much of her other than her left foreleg
 >Oh well, beggars can't be choosers. VIVA LE RESISTANCE!
 
 Be Cookies
 >This is going better than expected!
 >He's on the verge of cracking!
 >You've all but won!
 >If anyone ever found out you did this to a 'helpless' prisoner, it would be you eating snack times in a cell
 >But it will all be worth it...
 >once
 >he
 >cracks!
 >Ha! He's trying to wriggle loose, but you'll be having NONE of that!
 >he can barely....
 >Oh no
 >Oh Cadence's Colorful Crystals, he's not cracking! HE'S FIGHTING BACK!
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Seems like the area around the hoof is extremely sensitive.
 >You can turn this around!
 >As your fingers dance and dig around the sole and frog, her grip starts to weaken
 >her tail moves more erratically, significantly hampering her assault
 >With a mighty shove, you manage to push her off enough to completely free the arm that was under her
 >[It begins]
 >You loop your free arm over her and begin to dance your fingers across her withers, down her sides and under her armpit
 >You continue your two-pronged assault on her sides and hoof as she falls from you, face a rictus grin as she struggles to keep from laughing
 >You got this. You were tickle fight champion back in the day. You've never lost once
 >Why start now?
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >HOW DID THIS HAPPEN!?
 
 >Anon continues his relentless assault as you try and tumble away
 >You try to kick him away, but he easily overpowers your tickle-weakened limbs
 >His hands move to your belly and continue their cruel dance
 
 >IT CAN'T END LIKE THIS!
 >YOU WON'T ADMIT DEFEAT!
 >Maybe if you can--
 >Too late
 >Anon is going for the kill!
 >TUMMY TICKLES
 >You have to fight it, you CAN still turn this around! YOU CAN STILL-
 >Pony.exe has stopped responding
 >Would you like to restart? [y]/[n]
 >[y]!
 >Cookies-n-Cream is downloading updates, please wait.....0%
 >
 >
 >
 >
 >.....1%
 Be Anon
 >Whoops
 >You broke her again
 "Cookies, hello? Are you alright?"
 >She just continues to stare at the ceiling, occasionally blinking.
 >She'll be fine, just needs a minute to catch her breath
 >You move over to the wall with her and begin to gently rub her belly apologetically.
 >What brought on this sudden, merciless sneak attack?
 >hrm...
 >
 >
 >
 "Wait...."
 >She asked if you had a 'special somepony'
 >then jumped on you...
 >
 >
 >
 >she must have a crush on you!
 "Daw..."
 >Adorable little guard pony
 >Actually though... she is really nice.
 >Been the only one to talk to you like you weren't a monster...
 >And she smells like freshly baked cookies (duh)
 >this could work!
 >except she's a guard and you're a prisoner...
 >hrm
 >Ah what the hell, what could go wrong?
 >You are jailed indefinitely twice?
 
 Be Cookies
 >....99%
 >.....
 >....
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >100%
 >Why is the whole world made of ceiling tiles?
 >....oh, because you are looking at the ceiling
 >Why were you looking at the ceiling?
 >And just what was that /heavenly/ sensation on your tummy?
 >feels so good...
 >What were you doing again?
 >hard to think, so nice~
 >"You coming back to me, Cookies?"
 >What the what? ANON?!
 >What is he doing here?!
 "what are you doing here?!"
 >for that matter, where is here?
 >"This is my cell"
 >That's silly, why would you be in his ce-
 >oh HORSE APPLES
 >HE WON
 >he won, and you lost. He absolutely dominated you.
 >again
 >you might as well get used to the idea of being a laughing stock for the rest of your life
 >the guard pony that couldn't handle a single prisoner
 >and that's the best case scenario...
 >and now he's rubbing it in by rubbing your belly
 >you resign yourself to your fate, turning your face to hide your blush
 >Why can't anything ever go your way?
 
 
 Be Anon
 >She's cute when she looks so confused.
 >Still, good to see her back from her own personal 'Nam
 "This is my cell"
 >Why does she look upset?
 >She's probably just self-conscious
 >nervous that you will reject her
 >Weird how she just jumped on you though
 >probably just a pony thing
 >Time to make her feel better!
 "I know what you were trying to do"
 >A panicked look explodes across her features
 >"Please, I ju-"
 >You boop her nose to silence her
 >oh that scrunch
 
 >BRAIN, this is heart. What the HELL is going on!? Why are my systems critical?
 >Heart, this is brain. We have a class ten cute factor going on out here.
 >Brain this is heart. God help us all.
 
 >That scrunch has thoroughly derailed your train of thought.
 >all is quiet, save for the gentle sounds of mirth far away.
 >Seems like show and tell is really lively today
 "While you were 'out' I gave it some thought... You are my only real friend in this entire world. Everyone else has seen me as some kind of monster."
 >Her face morphs from panick scrunchie to confusion
 "When I first got to this world, the only person who would come near me is the princess of nerds. Even she only thought of me as a weird test subject."
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >what is Anon talking about?
 >he's never talked this way before. He's always been so... emotionless?
 >no, that isn't the right word
 >Is there a word for somepony made of steel in a world of cardboard?
 >"I didn't really care about anyone from this place, this whole world. Sure people were nice, but they were all so afraid of me that none of it seemed real."
 >Anon clears his throat and gives a nervous little chuckle, his hand moving from your belly to his own lap.
 >"I never really had a chance at a girl back home, and when I learned there were no other humans around... I just gave up on love entirely"
 >Oh Sombra's Saturday Sombrero, what is happening?
 >"But if you really want to be my 'special somepony' and you won't get in trouble, I can give it a chance. You really are a special pony after all." He chuckles again.
 >Wait, what?
 "You think I'm trying to make you my special somepony?"
 >His expression changes from awkward grin to mild confusion
 >"Why else would you ask about it and then jump on me?"
 >Is that really how 'humans' show interest in eachother?
 >weird
 >must be a human thing
 "I didn't..."
 >wait...
 >He thought you were special
 >only your parents ever thought you were special!
 >Stallions never like the tough prison-guard mare...
 >Stallions always go for the cute mares who can cook. Mares like your sister...
 >He must have been trying to show you he cared yesterday by ruthlessly hugging you!
 
 >This, this was the best case scenario!
 >You make him promise not to talk about your cuddle sessions.
 >You get to keep your job
 >And you can't force a cuddle on someone who wants it...
 >You get to keep your dignity!
 >but really... a giant bald monkey?
 > he does smell nice~
 >and those 'hands'!
 >You suspect you've only begun to experience what they are capable of.
 >BUT HE'S A MONKEY
 >a monkey that is giving you the most confused, worried look...
 >He's adorable when he's nervous
 >It is settled, you'll give it a shot!
 "Promise not to tell anyone about....us?"
 >it felt weird saying that
 >his grin returns
 >"Of course not. Things may be relaxed here but I'm guessing this kind of thing isn't really allowed"
 "N-Not really..."
 >"Like I said before, I'm willing to try this if you are. You are the one in danger with this, not me."
 "What do you mean?"
 >"I mean what's the worst thing they can do to me? Revoke snack time? Double imprison me? I'll be fine."
 >Daw... he's worried about you
 "I'll be ok as long as we keep it a secret"
 >"I won't say a word, I promise"
 >awesome, you were in the clear!
 >
 >
 >now what?
 "Now what?"
 >he chuckles, "That is really up to you. Show and Tell is probably wrapping up soon, but everyone will probably go to the play."
 >Warden had gotten the Ponyville Players to show the musical "Daring Do and the Emerald Melon
 >"...and after that is lunch. So we have a good hour and a half before we have to worry about being anywhere specific. Unless you want to catch the show? Or have you already.... 'scene' it?"
 >That monster
 "bad inmate, puns are a no-no"
 >He chuckles again
 "Actually~"
 
 Be Anon
 >"Actually~"
 >Cookies begins to nibble at her lip nervously
 >"Could you pet my belly again? That felt really nice."
 >That blush!
 >That lip nibble!
 >Dong expand + Daw... = Dawong expand
 >Dawong expand
 >Time to give this little pony -YOUR little pony- the tummy rubbing of her life!
 
 Still Be Anon
 >Be waking up from a lovely dream
 >lovely by human standards
 >you actually caught Luna puking in your brain
 >serves her right.
 >Three days have passed since you and Cookies became an item, and you have settled into a routine with her.
 >light cuddles in your cell during Show and Tell before lunch, and serious cuddles around 'lights out'
 >Show and Tell was boring anyway
 >'this is the spoon I used at breakfast'
 >'this is the sock I'm wearing right now'
 >he always showed that one sock
 >only one sock
 >Hugging Cookies is much more fun
 >even though it is more dangerous for your heart
 >Finding an excuse to have her in your cell late was too easy
 >Some inmates need to be read a bedtime story to fall asleep.
 >The perfect excuse to cuddle in the soft glow of a night light while everyone else was visiting Luna
 >Cookies would even sneak you extra pudding cups at night
 >Getting up and stretching, you notice another letter under your door
 >Royal seal again
 >same as every morning now
 >same message 'thou art still insane'
 >stupid moon-horse
 >you glance at the clock, still some time before breakfast. Cookies' 'appointment' is still a couple hours away.
 >damn
 >oh well, might as well hit the gym or library until breakfast.
 >you shower, dress, and head out the door to your cell scratching your chin
 >too much stubble
 >hairy pones won't let you shave
 >thought that putting a razor sharp blade to your neck and moving it all around your face to remove hair was crazy
 >You decide to go to the library first, where all the books have thick plastic pages
 >Wouldn't want anyone to get a paper cut
 >You check out a history textbook
 >all of pony fiction could be summed up as 'dude/dudette was happy with friends and then made more friends. The end'
 >history at least had /some/action
 >you head to the gym with your plastic book
 >nothing like reading while walking on a treadmill. Working your brain and body!
 >Cuddles with Cookies are more fun though...
 
 "Oh well, It'll be time soon enough"
 >Time walk nowhere and read about nothing!
 >Excitement!
 
 Be Cookies
 >Your ears itch
 >you never really noticed how much they seemed to itch all the time until Anon's fingers and nails got to them
 >Those things could sate an itch like nothing else
 >you still couldn't believe your luck
 >everything is turning out alright so far!
 >no one has found out about you and Anon
 >and with any luck, it will stay that way
 >Your ears twitch as you pass the gate into the prison
 >Your pre-lunch cuddle quickie was still HOURS away.
 >And your nightly cuddlefest?
 >You don't even want to /think/ about how far away that is
 >You go to the guardhouse and suit up, making sure to grab the hottest, freshest, longest EUC available from the guardhouse bakery
 >Gotta be able to subdue dangerous inmates
 >there is one you wish you could subdue all night long~
 "No, bad Cookies"
 >You need to focus on your morning duties and rounds right now.
 >Time for all that later.
 >You check the duty chart
 >color-coded by guard coat colors
 >hrm...
 >You are patrolling the indoor playground for most of the morning, followed by the movie theater
 >You grab the kit specialized for playground duty, which contains everything from lollypops to life saving anti-booboo supplies.
 >Playgrounds could be dangerous
 >you double check the kit, making sure everything is in place, and head to the playground
 >You always liked patrolling here
 >The floor is padded with foam to help avoid life-threatening injuries like scraped knees
 >That padding meant your hooves hurt less at the end of the day.
 >Nothing left but to wait out the hours on duty until you could see Anon...
 
 Be Anon
 >The morning dragged on, you couldn't focus on your exercise or book. Even though they were both absolutely /thrilling/
 >Breakfast is nearly over now
 > you had a good helping of pancakes and waffles
 >you made a waffle/pancake 'burger'
 >with fresh fruit and syrup
 >Cookies was with you at breakfast
 >she was still your mealtime chaperone, after all
 >Every now and then during the meal, you would catch her watching you a little more closely than was required by her position
 >You'd shoot her a wink every time
 >You knew it was dangerous to flirt in front of the entire mess
 >and your heart almost gave out every time from the way she would blush and focus on her own plate
 >but it was worth it
 >"Please put away your dishes and get ready for Show and Tell everypony!"
 >That PA system goes through the entire prison.
 >You and Cookies put your trays away
 >The entire time you were sharing the same thought
 >it WAS time for 'Show and Tell'
 >You'd show her your hands and she'd tell you where to rub...
 
 Be Anon
 >Lunch is over
 >Time to shine
 >You head towards your cell, Cookies will follow in a few minutes
 >She won't be here for another five to ten minutes
 >Perfect
 >You move over to your bed against the back corner of your cell
 > Your bed was large by human standards
 >Stupid big by tiny horse standards
 >They had given you  a dozen pillows along with amazingly soft sheets and three blankets
 >This place really was like paradise sometimes
 >You remove the pillows and blankets from the bed and begin to carefully arrange the pillows into a nest shaped roughly like a lopsided bowl with pillows against the wall
 >Perfect to lean against
 >You lay all but one of the blankets on top of the pillows, nearly completing the setup
 >All it needed now was someone to help you fill it
 >And you knew just the pony for the job
 >You took off your shirt and tossed it aside
 >Cookies couldn't resist you without a shirt
 >Speaking of which, she should be arriving any-
 >Several soft knocks at your front door interrupt your thoughts
 >The time for your mid day cuddle was upon you!
 >Huzzah!
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be walking to your pre-lunch cuddle session
 >Be very excited to have your itch /finally/ scratched
 >Be also thoroughly annoyed with Anon
 >What was he thinking, teasing you like that during breakfast?
 >The others might have noticed!
 >Your relationship was /far/ from appropriate, after all
 >A guard sneaking cuddles with an inmate!
 >It was the kind of scandal that could end your career
 >The kind of scandal that could put you in prison for 'taking advantage of an inmate'
 >Never mind the fact that HE started it!
 >You almost don't notice the soft sound of knocking coming from around the bend in the hall.
 >You cautiously slow your canter and peek around the corner
 >OH HAY BISCUITS
 
 Be Anon
 >You fling open your door
 "Hey, about time you-"
 >OH BISCUITS
 >That isn't Cookies
 >That isn't Cookies at all
 >or if it is, she is doing an /amazing/ impression of the warden
 "H-Howdy Warden, what brings you here?"
 >"Hello Anon it is good to...see... you
 >The warden is stunned by your bare chest
 >not because of muscle or fat, but because you've never been bare-chested in public
 >The Warden continues to stare at you for several seconds
 >You cross your arms self-consciously
 >She shakes her head and blushes slightly
 >"You've been absent from Show and Tell for a couple days now, is everything ok?"
 "Eeyup, everything is just fine. I'm a happy camper."
 >"You sure? I've heard you've been having trouble making friends. Coming to Show and Tell could help you  make friends."
 "Nope, I'm good, no need for that. I have plenty of friends already!"
 >"Really? Who are they?"
 "Well..."
 >You can't say Cookies is your friend, that might make the Warden suspicious
 "None of my friends are in prison."
 >NAILED IT!
 >"Don't you get lonely here alone? And why don't your friends ever visit you?"
 >BECAUSE YOU ARE IN THE WAY
 "Because...they are very busy with their lives"
 >"You really should make friends here. Join in one of the activities going on right now! Just because your block is doing Show and tell  doesn't mean you have to. You can join one of the other groups. There are groups knitting, doing book club, and I hear there's even a group playing with a ball in the yard. I hear the game is pretty intense"
 >If this goes on much longer, Cookies might get caught trying to sneak to your room!
 >You had to get the Warden away from your room by any means necessary
 "I'll try joining the book club for a while I guess.."
 >"Lovely! I'm sure they'll be happy to let you join"
 "Just let me get my shirt"
 >you shut your door and quickly put your shirt back on
 "gotta let Cookies know why I'm not here"
 >You grab a pencil and paper to leave a note
 >She'd probably be so worried otherwise
 >You leave the note on your bed and open the door to once again see the Warden
 >Her eyes light up as she starts leading you down the hall towards the library
 >Looking back towards your room, you spot a flash of movement at the far end of the hall
 >Cookies n Cream!
 >She is peering out from the bend in the hall
 >If she were human, she'd be staring daggers at the back of the Warden's head
 >She was doing the pony equivalent
 >Staring slightly dehydrated dandelions
 >You mouth an "I'm Sorry" to her and she bites her lower lip
 >Human souls were not meant to handle this level of Hnngg
 >Cookies disappears behind the wall as the Warden turns her head to face you
 >And begins to sing, not noticing your discomfort
 >About making friends
 >WHY DID THEY ALWAYS SING
 >That was another reason you liked Cookies
 >She never sang for no reason
 >And her singing voice was the perfect opposite of the Warden's singing voice
 >As the Warden walked and Warbled, you wished she wouldn't have wasted your time
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >HORSE FEATHERS!
 >HAY BISCUITS!
 >[ANGRY HORSE NOISES]!
 >Having nothing else to do, you head to the guardhouse to think of creative and new curses
 >and to take a shower
 >a really cold one
 
 Be Anon
 >Be at the book club
 >Time has stopped
 >You could see a hummingbird's wings make delicate movements as it slowly flew past the window
 >The inmates were /still/ discussing the latest chapter in their book
 >All the character did was go to a florist's shop
 >All the book club did was discuss the symbolic importance of the flower's colors
 >/every/ flower
 >In a florist's shop
 >There's one flower you'd like to show these inmates
 >Very pretty flower
 >Flower that's a better singer than they are too
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPs8SZZTg68
 >yeah...
 >that would be neat
 >you sigh
 >at least book club is only an hour and a half long
 >only an hour and twenty seven minutes and thirty four second to go...
 
 Be Cookies
 >That itch felt like it was burrowing through your skull!
 >And because the Warden had stolen Anon, you had lost your chance to get it scratched during your break
 >You were stationed in the communication room, the heart of the PA system
 "Today's  lunch special will include artichokes and oranges from Manehattan with cheese and dairy from the Udder ranch. It will be...
 >Oh you really /dislike/ whoever wrote this script
 "...udderly delicious"
 >That physically hurt
 >Oh hey, this is an interesting announcement...
 "Princess Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Ponyville and Leader of the Elements of Harmony has generously decided to offer a prize to the best behaved inmate by the end of the week. She will deliver the prize personally during lunch."
 >She's the princess that sent Anon to prison, wasn't she?
 >This prison
 >That she's going to visit
 >This could be bad...
 >Nah, you are just worrying yourself over nothing
 >What's the worst that could happen?
 
 Be Anon
 >You can feel your will to live draining from your body
 >You couldn't feel your hands anymore
 >"The description of the flower first flower of the top row of the bouquet on the top shelf of the western wall, closest to the door was simply divine"
 >"I agree, I love the color yellow!"
 >You were going to die in this library, surrounded by idiots discussing flowers
 >"Please excuse the interruption, I have to use the little warden's room"
 >The Warden was leaving?
 >Now was your chance to escape!
 >You watch her step out of the library towards the hallway restroom
 >Showtime
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XAYhNHhxN0A
 >As soon as the other inmates put their noses back into their books, you carefully slid from your chair
 >Staying low so that their books blocked their fields of vision from you, you inch your way under your chair and away from the group
 >risking a glance back, you notice one of the inmate's isn't looking at his book,
 >He's staring at where you were sitting with a perplexed expression on his face
 >He takes a deep breath, no doubt to alert the Warden of your escape attempt!
 >NONONONONONO
 >"WAAAAAASCHUOUOU"
 >*sniff*
 >THANK YOU BASED GOD
 >He was only sneezing
 >All the other inmates comment on the power of his sneeze and he just blushes and giggles
 >As everyone returns their noses to their books, he really does notice you aren't sitting across from him anymore.
 >You hold perfectly still
 >He glances around the Library until he sees you
 >On the floor
 >Near the door
 >He just raises an eyebrow and slowly  turns back to his book and the discussion
 >You'd have to remember to properly thank him for not ratting you out
 >But that would be taken care of in the future
 >For right now, escape!
 >You've made it to the door!
 >VICTORY!
 >*sink sounds*
 >The Warden is about to leave the bathroom!
 >The one you have to get past to complete your escape
 >DEFEAT!
 >no
 >NO
 >MommaNON did NOT raise no quitter!
 >You retreat back to the library, planning the next phase of your great escape
 
 Be The Warden
 >You still have no idea why your parents named you that
 >What you do know is that you /really/ needed the restroom
 >You felt so much better!
 >You had been holding that in for a long time
 >You didn't want to miss a single second of book club
 >You loved discussing flower colors!
 >You leave the restroom feeling refreshed and hurry back to the book club
 >You were so proud of yourself for getting Anon out of his cell
 >He had spent the entire book club looking outside, deep in thought
 >Flower colors are serious business
 >You were glad he was taking it all so seriously!
 >Before you take your seat, you notice something wrong
 >There is an empty chair next to yours
 >Anon disappeared
 >...
 >Poor dear must be shy, and couldn't stay with the group without you!
 >You had to find him so that he knew it was ok to rejoin the group!
 >You didn't hear anypony pass the bathroom, so he must still be in the library somewhere
 >Time to find that silly 'human' and bring him back to the group
 >You put your nose to the ground and begin to sniff for him
 >Found his trail!
 >Only a matter of time, now!
 >Let the search begin!
 
 Be Anon
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lp6z3s1Gig0
 >You had managed to find a fog machine in the back of the library
 >Perfect to obstruct the Warden's vision
 >But that wouldn't help much
 >You knew about ponies' powerful sense of smell
 >Especially the Warden's nose
 >You had taken the last minute to prepare
 >You had speed in two circles, forming a figure eight shape between the shelves
 >after completing the circuit, you had retreated farther into the depths of the library
 >You watch the Warden sniff for your trail...
 >There! She found it
 >She keeps her head down and follows your trail until she gets to your diverged paths
 >Please take the bait!
 >Damn! No dice, she followed the real trail...
 >...the real trail that lead straight to you!
 >You have to lose her somehow
 >You creep from your hiding place and begin a high-stakes game of hide-and-seek
 >Luckily the same inmates who had left the fog machine behind must have had a party
 >that they didn't clean up afterwards
 >There was all sorts of stuff to help you escape, just lying in the aisles
 >Someone was probably going to lose dessert privileges over the mess
 >Hopefully they don't miss too much dessert
 >Their laziness has given you the keys to escaping this club meeting
 >You snatch up a soccer ball and roll it down an aisle...
 >This time she took the bait!
 >"Freeze!....ball...hrm.."
 >You hadn't stuck around, making your way to a record player
 >Some inmates read better if music was playing
 >You turn it on and skedaddle behind a bookcase
 >The warden rushes towards the back of the library, where the record player sits
 >You have almost completely outmaneuvered her!
 *click*
 >The music stops
 >She must have turned it off
 >"Come out Anon, it's ok, I'm here again! Let's just go back to the group so we can talk about flowers some more!"
 >You'll never take me alive!
 >Darn, she is heading back towards the door
 >There must still be some way to get past her!
 >...Oh, that might work!
 >Yea, this would be great
 >You saw it in a cartoon once so it had to be a good idea
 >You sneak behind the Warden, just a few steps behind as she moves back towards the door
 >Her head perks up
 >She's about to look back!
 >You dive behind a shelf
 >She sniffs the air...
 >...and keeps going towards the door
 >close call, the fog saved you
 >You creep out behind her again, carefully only stepping when she does
 >You've almost made it to the door now, if you can just distract her...
 >The door is to your left, so you carefully extend an arm and tap her right shoulder
 >You jerk your arm back and do your best to stick to the wall to avoid detection
 >No good, she's seen this trick before!
 >She looks straight at you!
 >THE JIG IS UP!
 >"Huh, weird, he must have gone to the back of the library again..."
 >She completes the turn and moves deeper into the library
 >How did she not see you?!
 >You let out a deep breath of relief and turn to the wall
 >What could have camofl...
 >...oh
 >The art club aparently decided you were the perfect muse
 >'The Wall of Anons'
 >Thank you based pone drawfags
 >Some of those paintings looked alive
 >Their eyes...your eyes... seemed to follow you
 >Creepy
 >You shake your head, no time to admire the perfection that is yourself!
 >You dash out the door and back towards your cell
 >It was the first place the Warden would look for you
 >You knew that
 >She knew that you knew that
 >She'd never suspect you'd be so stupid as to hide in your own room!
 >Making it the perfect hiding place
 >VICTORY, THY NAME IS ANONYMOUS!
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be upset
 >Anon is  missing all the pretty flower talk!
 >and so are you!
 >...
 >He'll come out when he's comfortable, and rejoin on his own soon
 >...probably
 >you just don't want to miss anymore discussion!
 >You had to know what everypony thought of the fifth flower in the third row of the bouquet in the EXACT center of the western wall of the florist's shop!
 
 Be Anon
 >No need to keep that note you wrote earlier, since Cookies saw you leave with the Warden
 >'Dear Cookies, I've been abducted by a tone-deaf monster and taken to its lair in the library. If I don't survive, I dedicate my remains to science'
 >You rip up the note and toss its pieces in the trash
 >Nothing to do for now except stay hidden for a while
 >You suddenly hear Cookies' voice
 >"Today's lunch special will include..."
 >Oh, she's just reading the announcements
 >dang, for a second there you had thought she had snuck back into your room
 >no snuggles for you this time
 >you give a forlorn glance at the nest you had lovingly crafted on your bed
 >was it doomed to remain unused for cuddles?
 >"... with cheese and dairy from the Udder ranch. It will be... udderly delicious"
 >you could /sense/ her scrunching in distaste of that pun
 >like adorable mortar fire
 >You check your clock
 >fifty minutes had passed since you were kidnapped and forced to endure book club
 >another forty until it ended and you were 'safe'
 >wait, did Cookies just say that cryptozoologist   wannabe princess was coming to visit the prison?
 >That will be...neat
 >What's the worst that could happen?
 >With nothing else to do to kill the time, you decided to finish off that history book you rented earlier
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be done with announcements
 >Be assigned your least favorite job
 >Patrolling the outside of the prison
 >Couldn't let anyone sneak close enough to the prison to tease the inmates
 >Just because they were criminals didn't mean they had no feelings
 >Celestia, why did you make today so hot and bright?
 >You pull down the rim of your cap to help block the sun from your eyes
 >The hat actually helped muffle the itching a little
 >Not nearly enough though
 >Patrolling around like this always made your hooves hurt and your head ache
 >That itch wasn't helping any either
 >Nothing to do now but grin and bear it...
 >You tug down the cap again and continue your rounds
 
 Be The Warden
 >Book club had ended several minutes ago.
 >Anon had never rejoined the group, and you were worried for him
 >It wasn't healthy to avoid being around others like this
 >You decided to check his room to see if he's feeling alright
 >You step up to his door and knock
 >"Hello? Who's there?"
 "It's me, The Warden."
 >"I'M NOT HERE"
 "Can I come in Anon? I'm worried about you"
 >"I'm fine!"
 "Since you didn't make any friends at the book club, lets join the knitting club for a while! I'm sure you'll meet somepony you like there!"
 >"I said I'm not here! Goodbye!"
 "Anon, I know you're in there. I'm coming in, ok?"
 >You hear frantic sounds from inside the room
 >you open the door to find his bathroom door ajar and the main room empty
 "Anon..."
 >You walk into his bathroom to find the shower curtains pulled closed
 >Poor dear is so shy, he's hiding in the shower!
 "Its ok Anon, everypony will be happy to see you and will treat you nicely"
 >you pull back the curtain to find the stall empty
 >As you do, you hear familiar frantic sounds from the main room
 >You look out his door in time to see him sprinting out the front door of his cell
 >He must have hidden himself under the bed!
 >You would not let him get away
 >You could not let him get away
 >You were not going to let this ape escape again!
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmVIhPW9Miw&index=25&list=PL118467C23E137CDD
 >You gallop after him, reaching the hall just in time to see him disappear around the near corner
 >It was no use, you knew this prison like the back of your hoof
 >It was only a matter of time until you caught him!
 
 
 >some time later
 >How could Anon have this much stamina?!
 > Every time you got ahead of him, he'd just turn around and sprint the other way
 >hrm...
 >all paths lead back to the heart of the prison, the Mess
 >you could set your trap there
 >You rush to the mess hall to prepare
 
 Be Anon
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PyNTYgUkwOU&index=27&list=PL118467C23E137CDD
 >Be winning
 >Also be out of breath
 >Curse that tricksy pony!
 >Every time you thought you had escaped, there she was again!
 >Not your fault these equines have no respect for people who are antisocial!
 >You were not going to experience the horror of another prison club
 >You can't hear The Warden following you, so you take the chance to catch your breath
 >As soon as you and your lungs are back on speaking terms, you start walking down the hall again
 >did you actually lose her this time?
 >As you came to an intersection, you decide to take the risk and return to your room
 >As you turn towards your block, you notice something in the mess...
 >someone had left a perfectly good pudding cup alone and defenseless on one of the tables
 >Your spontaneous mid-afternoon fleeing session did burn a lot of energy, and pudding sounds /amazing/ right now...
 >It could be a trap
 >one thousand to one that its a trap
 "never tell me the odds"
 >Time to get your pudding on
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=trGSdWhdnQE&list=PL118467C23E137CDD&index=13
 >You do your best to nonchalantly stroll towards the treat
 >A single drop of sweat rolls down the side of your face
 >Every fiber of your being was on alert
 >With a few nervous glances around, you deem the treat safe and move in to secure the kill
 >itsatrap.jpg
 >You cry out as a net falls down on top of you, pulling you to the ground and away from your prize
 >Soft laughter fills the mess and you turn to face the source
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRvhrpcxGY4&index=36&list=PL118467C23E137CDD
 "Warden"
 >"Yes Anonymous. That was quite the workout you gave me! Have you considered joining our track and field clubs? You'd be amazing!"
 >What? Regular physical effort?!
 "HISSSSSSS"
 >"Now Anon, don't be like that. You really are too shy. You and I are going to sample clubs for the rest of the day together until you find at least one friend.  First up is that knitting club I mentioned!"
 >This is it, this is how you die
 >not with a bang, but with a crochet needle
 >NO!
 >There must be a way out of this!
 >THERE! Someone was watching from the hall...
 >It was the same pony that didn't rat you out earlier!
 >This would be a long shot, but it was your last hope
 "He's my friend!"
 >"He is?"
 >"I am?!"
 >The Warden turns to look at the stallion in question
 >"Is it true that you are friends with Anon?"
 "You betcha! We're great friends!"
 >He looks back and forth from you to the Warden
 >"No we're not"
 >The Warden looks back to you with a frown
 "...He's just kidding! He has such a sense of humor!"
 >The Warden looks back at him
 "In fact, we are such great friends that I was going to share my dessert with him"
 >You give him an over exaggerated wink to make sure he gets the idea
 >His brow furrows in confusion
 'Come on, understand what I'm really saying!'  you think to yourself
 >His eyes light up as understanding dawns
 >"Eeyup, me and...."
 >"Anon?"
 >"Yeah him, we are swell palls"
 "What he said, we are the best of friends. Me and...uh...this guy, practically inseparable"
 >You both shoot The Warden big false grins
 >"...I guess, if you both say so. I'm proud of you Anonymous! Way to come out of your shell and make a friend!
 >VICTORY
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WoN71bjXNkE&list=PL118467C23E137CDD&index=37
 >If you weren't in a net, you hug the glorious bastard!
 >no homo
 
 Still Be Anon
 >The Warden had left a few minutes ago, probably to bother some other poor bastard
 >She had taken the pudding with her 'Don't want to spoil anyponies appetite' she said
 >Leaving you alone with your new 'best friend'
 >Might as well get acquainted
 "Thanks, she would've never left me alone if it wasn't for you"
 >"No problem man... say, you really gonna give me your dessert?"
 "Yea, it's the least I can do for the rescue"
 >"Awesome"
 "so... I never caught your name"
 >"Nope"
 >Well then
 >Man of few words
 >er...stallion of few words
 "so... what is it?"
 >"Sleepy Feathers"
 "Huh, not a very intimidating name"
 >"nope"
 "So what did you do before you ended up here?
 >"Made pillows"
 >That would explain the feather on a pillow cutie mark
 "...What did you do to end up here?"
 >"obstructing traffic"
 "obstructing traffic?"
 >"Slept in the road"
 "huh"
 >"eeyup"
 "..."
 >"..."
 >well that was a bust
 "well, I'll see ya around Sleepy"
 >"Correct"
 >It was impossible to read this guy
 >Sleepy Feathers turns and slowly meanders out the western door, giving a loud yawn as he disappears from view
 >That yawn was infectious
 > As you stifle your own yawn, you consider your options:
 >Read a book?
 >You've had enough reading activities with that book club
 >exercise?
 >You're already pretty tuckered out from running from The Warden
 >Shower?
 >You check yourself for odor
 >Not terrible... but the sweat would only make you more ripe if you let it
 >Alright, item one on the agenda is a shower
 >But after?
 >You yawn again
 >you normally didn't like taking midday naps but...
 >it would be a good time killer until dinner, and you were tired
 >Its settled, shower first then naptime
 >You set off towards your room with a purpose
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be bothered by The Warden
 >Who apparently had nothing better to do than join you on your rounds around the prison
 >"... And then we talked about my /favorite/ flower in the chapter! Anonymous seemed to be really enjoying himself! He spent the entire time lost deep in thought!"
 >You really wish she wasn't your boss
 >"Poor dear is just so shy though!"
 >No he isn't, and you've had the belly rubs to prove it
 >"When I went to the little Warden's room..."
 >she giggled. ugh.
 >"...he disappeared! I refused to let him hide and not make friends"
 >Oh poor Anon...
 >"I spent the next two hours looking for him! Finally caught him using a brilliant strategy!"
 >She probably just left pudding out
 >"I set up a trap and baited him out with pudding!"
 >nailed it
 >"And wouldn't ya know it, my plan to help Anon make a friend WORKED!"
 >You doubt it
 >"I believe it's only a matter of time before he is happy and comfortable here! All thanks to me!"
 >The Warden is partially correct. Anon /will/ be comfortable here
 >But it will be because of you, not The Warden.
 "That's very good Ma'am Warden. Is there anything else?"
 >Please say no and go
 >PLEASESAYNOANDGO
 >"There is one other thing..."
 >You must have been such a meanie in a past life to deserve this
 >"... could you check in on him later? I think he's less shy around you"
 >Being paid to spend time with your coltfriend? In the middle of the day?
 >AllMyYes.jpg
 "Sure, I guess I could swing around to his cell a little early"
 >Oh wait... you are stationed out here until dinner...
 >No, you'd do anything to avoid walking in big circles around the prison all afternoon
 >and if you don't get scratchies soon, your head will implode from  that Tartarus-bound itch!
 "Ma'am, I'm stationed out here until dinner. Could you get somepony to cover for me so I can check in on Anon?"
 >"Sorry dearie, Night Watch has the day off and Criminal Justice called in sick. I hope the poor Stallion is alright..."
 >FOILED AGAIN!
 >WHY DOES CELESTIA HATE YOU SO?!
 >"Though I suppose... today has been quiet..."
 >She gives you a big grin
 >"... and I know how much you dislike patrolling around the prison..."
 >No, she doesn't
 >"... So I'll personally cover the patrol today. As a personal favor to you!"
 >THANK CELESTIA
 "Thank you Ma'am, I really appreciate this!"
 >"Of course dear, now go make sure Anon is feeling comfortable "
 "I will!"
 >Yea you will
 >'comfortable' is what you've nicknamed your tummy
 >Anon will most certainly be /feeling/ 'comfortable'
 >You hurry back to the main gate, trying not to look too eager
 >Time to FINALLY get this itch scratched!
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be several minutes later
 >You now remember why you don't do patrols
 >patrols are boring
 >and hot
 >and boring
 >and lonely
 >and did you mention boring?
 >Your hooves hurt
 >the sun was in your eyes
 >Celestia, why did you make it so hot and bright today?!
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be in the shower
 >You had decided you would head straight to bed after the shower
 >had already set your alarm for dinner time
 >Didn't want to sleep through Cookies' arrival and have her think you were ignoring her
 >You forgot to lock your front door though
 >You don't worry about it
 >You never get visitors
 >and  these ponies would never enter your room without knocking first
 >Even if they did need to visit, they'd probably hear your shower running and leave
 >You are too wet and soapy now anyway, no sense getting your entire room wet due to a little paranoia
 >and the shower is nice and warm
 >put you back in a good mood
 >You softly hum to yourself, lost in thought
 >You haven't had the same urges to sing as these colorful equines surrounding you
 >But that didn't mean you couldn't carry a tune
 >You just couldn't summon backup music from the fucking aether
 >Strange, strange musical magic horses
 >You finish rinsing off the soap and linger in the shower for a while
 >this place never ran out of hot water
 >There was five hours between lunch and dinner
 >The book club and warden escape had taken two and a half hours
 >This shower had already eaten up ten more minutes
 >You had about two hours and fifteen minutes before you could expect Cookies
 >You sigh and turn, letting the hot water warm and massage your other side
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be at Anon's door
 >You'd normally knock, but why bother?
 >You confidently stroll into the room, letting the door softly close behind you
 >wait... is he in the shower?
 >And you were in the room next door?!
 >L-lewd
 >Maybe you should wait outside his room?
 >Oh hey, the shower stopped!
 >You'll wait here then!
 >The time for cuddles was nearly upon you!
 >HUZZAH!
 >You hear movement from the bathroom
 >Then the doorknob rattled
 >As Anon stepped into the room, steam poured out from the bathroom behind him
 >Shirtless
 >with wet hair
 
 >Brain, this is body, please respond
 >....
 >Brain, I need orders
 >...
 >Brain?
 >"Hey Cookies! I thought you had patrols until dinner?"
 
 Be Anon
 >Someone entered your room
 >without knocking
 >You shut off the shower and step out
 >You quickly towel off and pull on pants
 >You'd left your clean shirt in your room
 >Oh well, you'll just have to face the intruder while showing a little more of your natural perfection than usual
 >You open the bathroom door and scan the room
 >Oh, it's just Cookies
 >wait, Cookies is here!
 "Hey Cookies! I thought you had patrols until dinner?"
 >You were happy to see her, but it would be really dangerous for her to leave her post
 >"Er...no...I used to though"
 "What do you mean?"
 >Her eyes haven't moved a millimeter since they landed on you and her pupils were the size of pinheads
 >Her face was bright red and she was biting her lip
 >You loved it when she did that
 >and she has her mane in a ponytail, coming out of the hole in the back of her hat
 >U-unf
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Get a hold of yourself, filly!
 >He asked you a question!
 >He is also beaming the biggest smile you've ever seen
 "The Warden asked me to make sure you were feeling comfortable here and making friends"
 >"How long can you stay?"
 "How long until dinner?"
 >His grin grows (somehow) even larger
 >His eyes are practically sparkling
 >"Time for cuddles?"
 "YES PLEASE"
 >He chuckles, a deep melodious sound
 >Anon walks past you to lock the door
 >"Can't be too careful. Who knows who might enter without knocking"
 >You are too distracted by the promise of ear scritchies to be embarrassed
 >Anon then walks to the bed and motions you over.
 >Did he make a nest?
 >out of pillows and blankets?
 >Is that a thing humans do?
 >that
 >is
 >ADORABLE
  >You jump up onto the bed sit between his splayed legs
 "Can you scratch my ears? I've had the/worst/ itch all day"
 >"Only if you promise to put the cap back on after"
 "Hm? Like a mare in uniform huh?"
 >"Who doesn't?"
 "Less talk, more scratching"
 >Anon chuckles again
 >You have finally arrived at the promised land
 
 Be Anon
 >You reach out and begin to scratch behind Cookies' ears
 >Is...is her back leg kicking a little?
 >No way....
 >This requires further study!
 >FOR SCIENCE
 >As you continue to caress, massage, and scratch her ears, she slowly slumps down into you
 >Back leg twitching slightly the entire time
 >After several long minutes of this, the twitching slows and her contented sighs stop
 >"That... was amazing, I mean really /really/ great"
 >She has the silliest little grin on her face
 "What do you mean 'was'? I'm far from finished"
 >you scritch under her chin and she giggles
 >Time to get this party started
 >You pull her up into a tight hug, which slowly morphs into petting
 >You can feel her heart beating
 >She wriggles around in pure joy
 >As you stroke her neck and withers, and she ends up with her back against your stomach
 >You pick up her cap and put it back on her head
 >She scrunched at the interruption
 >"Why did you stop?"
 "You promised to wear the hat, didn't you?"
 >[Scrunchie intensifies]
 >You chuckle and resume your petting
 >Starting just under her neckline, your hands make languid strokes down her front and sides
 >Every now and then she wriggles against you again
 >Seems almost like she's trying to meld with you
 >Like a fluffy, cuddly Voltron
 >You scratch her chest fluff and she curls her tail around your leg
 >You scratch the hard to reach places on her sides
 >She melts
 >If it was possible for a pony to be so comfortable that they became a liquid, it was about to happen
 >Let's see if that's possible!
 
 Be Cookies
 >YOU
 >LOVE
 >FINGERS
 >Anon's fingers are able to sate itches you didn't even know you had!
 >Belly rubs, chest scritchies, and petting
 >You could not be more comfortable than you are now
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >Ok, you were wrong, you could not be more comfortable than you are NOW
 >...
 >...
 "Oh that's nice~"
 >Instead of answering, Anon begins to nibble your ear and massage your hoof
 >This is paradise
 
 Be Anon
 >Cookies is humming with pleasure
 >occasionally giggling or cooing, depending on how you move
 >She is putty  in your hands
 >You rake your fingers up her side against the grain of her short fur, leaving little lines on her coat
 >she takes a deep breath
 >You smooth down the lines in her fur
 >She slowly lets out her breath with a contented sound
 >She cranes her head back to put her cheek next to yours
 >She rubs into you and you bury your face in her neck
 >She normally smells like a fresh cookies
 >She is also still carrying the smell of the outside world
 >The combined effect reminds you of picnics as a kid
 >You couldn't be happier in this moment
 >You both share a wish
 >That this would last forever
 >Your ministrations slow as your breathing slows and deepens, mirroring Cookies' breathing
 >As the minutes move cruelly forward, she falls asleep in your arms
 >You follow soon after
 
 
 Be Anon's Alarm Clock
 >Be an inanimate object
 >If you could see, you'd see Anon and Cookies spooning
 >They had rolled once or twice while sleeping
 >at first, Anon was the big spoon
 >Then Cookies turned to face him and they slept like that for a while, gently breathing into each other's contented smiles
 >Then Anon turned in his sleep and Cookies became the 'big spoon'
 >She almost looked like a backpack
 >Her legs were wrapped around his side, one just under his armpit and the other just below his hip
 >Her tail had stayed curled around his leg the entire time
 >She would occasionally twitch slightly in her sleep
 >An ear flop here, a leg twitch there
 >Anon had one hand holding the hoof draped over his chest, the other arm was stretched out in front of him
 >Celestia had decided to take the afternoon off, and was setting the sun a few hours early
 >meaning her gold and amber light was fading quickly, bathing the room in a soft orange-red glow
 >It was the most idyllic, poetic scene any alarm clock could ever hope to be a part of
 >If alarm clocks could have hopes
 >It was the ultimate expression of contented lovers
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-ZqhRg3km4
 >Anon immediately sits bolt upright
 >Cookies' eyes shoot open and she stares at the ceiling, frozen with shock
 >all four legs straight up in the air
 >"Shit shit shit SHIT!"
 >"ANON! Language!"
 >"Sorry!"
 >If alarm clocks could love their job
 >You would
 
 Be Anon
 >Alduin, Vaas, Frieza, even Diablo himself...
 >... Have /nothing/ on the pure evil that is your alarm clock
 >From this day forth, it is your mortal nemesis
 >You don't even bother hitting snooze, you remove the crystal battery
 >THY FOE IS VANQUISHED
 >However, its evil is merely slumbering, ready to take up the fight again when its power is replaced
 >You can never destroy pure evil
 >You look over to Cookies
 >She is glaring at the demon-clock
 >The fur on the side of her face had been smushed flat in her sleep
 >...she had bed face
 >bed face, with all four legs still sticking straight up
 >"W-what are you staring at?"
 >she begins to blush
 "Please...stop being so cute, too much more D'aww and who knows what will happen to my poor heart?"
 >She blatantly ignores your pleas for mercy
 >Her blush intensifies
 >"Why did you set that alarm anyway?"
 "ACK!.... I warned you, humans are not meant to be exposed to such levels of adorableness!"
 >Your hand clutches your chest as you feign a heart attack, huge grin on your face the entire time to show Cookies you were only joking around
 >Her blush reaches a peak, her face scrunches up and her cheeks puff out in annoyance
 >You chuckle and lean over to give her a hug
 "I was planning on taking a nap before you arrived. I set the alarm so I wouldn't be asleep when you got here"
 >Her scrunchie turns into a smile
 >you boop the scrunch back
 >you let out a laugh and she joins in
 >You lift up the cap and give her one last ear scratch
 >Her eyes close and her leg twitches again as she lets out a happy little sound, tilting her head into your hand
 >You help her muss up her face fur to its normal position, and get completely dressed
 >It was time for dinner
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be waking up from a nap
 >Today had been a good day
 >Made a friend
 >Who was weird
 >Dude crawled on the floor during book club
 >He also promised you his dessert
 >So he can't be all bad
 >You slowly force yourself out of bed with enough willpower to crush coal into diamonds
 >You walk into your bathroom and rinse out your mouth
 >Don't want nap-breath while eating with your new friend
 >You yawn and nearly choke on the water
 >being sleepy is dangerous
 >That is why you slept so much
 >Sleepy ponies make mistakes
 >sleeping ponies can't get into trouble
 >usually
 >Finished with your post-nap preparations, you head to the Mess
 >...
 >You walk away from the counter, tray laden with food
 >you usually sit alone
 >Ponies don't like sitting with you because you don't talk much
 >You are a good listener though
 >Even  if all the other inmates were too chatty
 >Not Anon though
 >He didn't pressure you to talk too much
 >He seemed nice
 >Speaking of Anon, there he is at his usual spot in the corner with Cookies
 >She was paid to watch Anon eat
 >Her mane seemed messier than usual
 >She probably needs to sleep more
 
 Be Anon
 >You see Sleepy Feathers across the Mess and wave him over
 >You had been dreading this moment
 >The moment you gave up your precious pudding
 >Sleepy Feathers trudges over to your table and sits across from you and Cookies
 "Hi Sleepy"
 >"Hello Anon"
 >You silently hand over your pudding cup
 >Sleepy nods at you
 >Cookies' eyes go wide in shock
 >"Why did you give him your pudding?" Cookies whispers
 "I owed him a favor for bailing me out with The Warden"
 >You watch as Sleepy sets your pudding on his tray, next to his own pudding cup
 >Farewell pudding cup, you will be missed
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-Xrlf3taEo
 >Let there be a moment of silence
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >"Hiya Cookies, Anon, and Sleepy!"
 >The Warden has no respect for the fallen
 >"How is your dinner everypony?"
 >"Its good, Ma'am"
 >Sleepy just nods
 >Never before have you struggled so hard to wear a false smile
 "Lovely, just peachy"
 >"I LOVE PEACHES! I didn't know we were serving them today!"
 "That's just an expression"
 >The Warden's ears flop down
 >"Oh...ok"
 >...and now you feel guilty for some reason
 >"So, anyway, will you two be participating in the competition for the mystery reward from the Princess?"
 >Sleepy shakes his head
 >"Aw, why not?"
 >"Too much effort"
 >"Oh sleepy, you joker"
 >The Warden giggles and turns towards you
 >"What about you Anon?"
 "Well, seeing as she's the one who had me put here, I doubt I have much of a chance at being the best behaved inmate"
 >"Are you sure about that? The Princess entrusted me with judging everypony, so you could still win with some good deeds"
 >The Warden beams at you
 "I'll keep that in mind"
 
 Be Cookies
 >"I'll keep that in mind"
 >Despite the tartarus-bound alarm clock, you were /still/ in the afterglow of the cuddle session earlier
 >A feeling even The Warden couldn't spoil
 >The Warden sits next to you and leans in close
 >"So how'd your little chat with Anon go?" she whispers loudly
 >What chat?
 >Oh yea, The Warden wanted you to talk to Anon about being friendlier
 >"I'd say it went very well"
 >You turn in surprise towards Anon to see him sporting a toothy grin
 >Your face scrunches up and he chuckles
 "Yea... Anon agreed to be friendlier, he might even give Book Club another try"
 >Anon turns to you with the biggest hurt expression you'd ever seen
 >"GOODIE! Tomorrow's book club will discuss how the main character 'Daisy Doodle' chooses a flower to buy. It'll be intense!"
 >D'aww, Anon has a little thousand yard stare...
 >... was book club really that bad? Poor Anon, what did you just get him into?
 >Sleepy just smiles and nods
 >"It's been fun catching up with you all, but I've got to check in on the other inmates too. Enjoy dinner!"
 >Sleepy nods in synch with Anon
 "You too ma'am"
 >The Warden practically jumps up and trots away
 >"Cookies..."
 "Yes Anon?"
 >"Why do you hate me?"
 "Is book club really that bad?"
 >Sleepy shakes his head 'no'
 >"Let's just make a few little rules about book club"
 "OK..."
 >"Rule number one: we do not talk about book club"
 "What's rule number two?"
 >"we do NOT talk about book club"
 >Well then
 >They were simple rules, at least
 >easy to remember
 "Alright, I'll follow the rules"
 >"You'd better. I'm the rule breaker, not you"
 >You giggle and turn to your meal
 
 >The rest of dinner passes without incident, you and Anon making light conversation
 >Sleepy would occasionally nod or shake his head to express his opinion on the topic
 >Sleepy had saved dessert for last like a good colt
 >Anon's eyes were glued to the pudding cup the entire time
 >With dinner ended, you and Anon said goodbye to Sleepy
 >Sleepy just waved goodbye
 >Anon turns to you
 >"So, I think I'd like to go to bed early"
 >B-but what about your after dinner cuddles?
 >You shoot him a pleading look
 >Maximum puppy sad puppy eyes
 >Anon just grins at you
 >Come on filly, gotta take it to the next level
 >Pout that bottom lip!
 >Anon chuckles again
 >"However, I don't think I can't sleep without a bedtime story"
 >Huh?
 >He winks
 >oh
 >OH
 >Your smile goes from ear to ear as you nod
 >"Shall we go to my room then?"
 >You shake your head
 "I'll need a minute to grab a book for your story"
 >"But I wasn't-"
 "Meet you there!"
 >"But I-"
 >Anon's words fade into the general din of the mess as you rush away
 >You look back to see a scrunchie on his face
 >You almost stop to get a better look
 >No wonder he thought it was cute when you did it
 >You lose sight of Anon as you continue to hurry away
 
 Be Anon
 >Well that didn't go as planned
 >Oh well, reading cuddles are just as good as vanilla cuddles
 >With nothing else to do, you make your way back to your cell
 
 
 Still Be Anon
 >Be in your cell
 >You had made your nest with two blankets, but you had a third sitting beside your bed
 >You pulled it partially over the nest from before
 >Blankets make cuddles warmer
 >Cookies was sure taking her time
 >It did not take that long to get to the library
 >Maybe the librarian was out?
 >nah, too early for that
 >what could she-
 >You hear a soft knock at your door
 >must be Cookies
 >better be sure, don't want a replay of The Warden abducting you
 "Who's there?"
 >"Mrglrmph"
 >Well then
 >That didn't work
 >That could have been anyone
 >The mystery guest starts to open the door and you half expect a murloc to waltz in
 "Hi Cookies!"
 >She had finally arrived!
 "Why didn't you say it was y-"
 >She had been carrying something in her mouth
 >That's not a book she's carrying
 >That's not a book at all
 >That's a pudding cup and a spoon!
 >She places the items on your nightstand with a small 'pleh' sound
 >"I couldn't bear the thought of my Anon going to bed without dessert"
 >She has the brightest blush on her face
 >and the most adorable smile
 >"And I wanted to say sorry for making The Warden think you were going to go back to book club"
 >This mare, man
 "This is fantastic! You are the best!"
 >You give her a big hug and she wraps herself around you in return
 >You release the embrace and open up the pudding cup
 >That glorious chocolate smell was the second greatest smell in the world
 >First place was Cookies' smell
 >You move to grab the spoon
 >Cookies blushes and looks away from you, yet still manages to sound stern and in-control of the situation
 >"ah-ah-ah, you aren't allowed to use cutlery"
 "Then how am I supposed to eat this? I don't have anything to dip into it"
 >"You might not be allowed to use spoons, but I am"
 >What is she getting at?
 >...
 >oh
 >OH
 >Her blush intensifies as she sees realization hit you like a brick
 >She picks up the spoon again and jumps up to the side of the bed and looks at you expectantly
 >You pick up the opened pudding and sit next to her
 >Holding the spoon lengthwise in her mouth, she dips her head forward and the spoon slides perfectly into the pudding
 >She carefully lifts her head so the spoon is parallel with the bed
 >You both lean forward and you take the other end of the spoon into your mouth
 >Cookies glance darts back and forth between your eyes and the floor
 >You both withdraw and you lick your lips
 >Cookies' eyes widen slightly at the gesture and she dips her head to get another spoonful
 >The process repeats itself several times, each time she feeds you she seems to become a little more nervous
 >by the time the pudding cup was nearly empty, she would tremble a little whenever you took the spoon into your mouth too
 >This must be really intimate for ponies
 >She must /really/ like you
 >You'd have to show her that the feeling is mutual
 >As soon as the pudding was gone, of course
 
 Be Cookies
 >You can't believe this is happening
 >You had to call in a couple favors for this pudding cup
 >And had risked discovery when you brought it to his cell
 >And when you had first entered the room, you were worried you might be taking things too far too fast
 >Last thing you wanted to do was scare away the one colt you'd ever been in a real relationship with
 >But Anon hadn't been freaked out by your forwardness
 >He looked like he was really enjoying himself!
 >So why were you still so nervous?
 >He really was cute
 >Even with you feeding him, he managed to get some pudding on the tip of his nose /somehow/
 >You'd have to help him clean himself later
 >But you didn't bring any napkins
 >That was really stupid, you should have been prepared!
 >What if Anon got his sheets or clothes dirty because of you?
 >You HAD to clean his nose before that happened!
 >but HOW?!
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >You could get it off by kissing his nose...
 >He did seem to like it when you acted forward
 >And his culture was different from yours
 >after all, his culture thought it was ok to cuddle outside of relationships
 >But then again....
 >You continued your internal debate the entire feeding
 >With the cup finally empty, Anon sets it on the nightstand
 >You carefully place the spoon inside the empty cup
 >You turn and face him, as he smiles at you
 >It's now or never
 >BUCK IT
 >YOU ARE ATTRACTIVE
 >HE LIKES YOU
 >TAKE THE CHANCE
 >Your head darts forward and you give him a little peck on the nose
 >MISSION COMPLETED
 >mission success?
 >His nose is clean, first objective successful!
 >Was he ok with you doing that?
 >His eyes are wide with surprise
 >please be ok with it
 >pleasebeokwithit
 >PLEASEBEOKWITHIT
 >He laughs and pulls you into a hug
 >MISSION SUCCESSFUL! ONE HUNDRED PERCENT PERFECTION!
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3suGfhnT2Sg
 >You beam a smile at him and he gives you a predatory grin
 >wait, what?
 >Oh my!
 >He picked you up!
 >Anon walks on his knees to the well-worn nest and flops on his side, taking you with him
 >you give a small cry as you fall and he chuckles, face buried in your fur
 >He pulls a blanket over the both of you and begins a ruthless cuddle assault
 >this
 >this was happiness
 
 Be Anon
 >Be some time later
 >Be with a thoroughly cuddled pony
 >You had your back against the wall, cushioned by pillows
 >Your arms were wrapped around Cookies
 >Cookies had her back pressed against your belly
 >The blanket was pulled up under her chin
 >She did a happy wriggle against you and turned her head to face you
 >"Say Anon, you never talk about where you came from"
 >You had been worrying about this
 >Prison was heaven
 >The Equestrian army was for show
 >perfectly 'normal' human dreams were treated as signs of severe mental illness...
 >Cookies just looked at you expectantly
 >"Please? I want to know more about you"
 >You could never say no to that face
 >Alright, lets avoid the bad stuff, just tell her about your family and human tech.
 "Well, I'll start with the basics. I had a mother and father, pets, and a sister"
 >"Were they nice?"
 "Not by pony standards, but they loved me and I loved them.  We took care of each other"
 >"What do you mean?"
 "Well, for example, when I was little I didn't want to learn to ride a bike but my dad insisted"
 >"What happened?"
 "I hated it because I kept falling and hurting myself. At one point I hid in the bathroom and locked the door, refused to leave for half a day!"
 >You chuckle at the memory
 >"But if you kept getting hurt and hated it, why did he make you continue?"
 >Cookies looks like she's on the verge of tears
 >damn, ponies are sensitive
 "He just wanted me to have the skill. He always pushed me hard. Helped me in the long run."
 >"It did?"
 "Helped me get my first job"
 >Cookies sniffs, that was a close one
 >"What did you do?"
 "Do you have computers here?"
 >"You mean like arcade cabinets?"
 "yea, kind of. Where I come from, we use computers like unicorns use magic."
 >"Don't you have magic in your world?
 "Nope"
 >"REALLY?!"
 >Eyes like saucers, she looks like you just told her there was no atmosphere on Earth
 "Eeyup, no magic. Our magicians and illusionists have some neat tricks but they are all just that...tricks, illusions"
 >"It must be so... dark.. where you come from. "
 >She scrunchies
 >"No, that isn't the right word..."
 >You give her a squeeze
 "Anyway, my people use machines and computers like unicorns use magic"
 >"You can use arcade machines to move objects? You're pulling my tail"
 "No I'm serious! We have machines to do almost everything.  From medicine to cooking to entertainment to..."
 >You were going to say 'fighting'
 "...music.  We even have machines to build OTHER machines"
 >"So what was your job if machines and 'computers' could do everything?"
 >You smile
 "I fixed computers. Even assembled a few"
 >"Really? Was it hard?"
 "Easy to put the pieces together, not so easy to know which parts to use or how to repair them. Usually just easier to replace a broken component entirely"
 >"Wow, so you're like what a powerful unicorn is here?"
 >You chuckle and shake your head
 "There's tons of people better at it than I was, and these machines were so complex that no one could know EVERYTHING about them. When a unicorn uses a spell, they know how to create and use every part of that spell, right?"
 >"I think so"
 "Well, human machines are so complex that no one human knows everything there is to know about how it was made."
 >"If no one knows how they work, then why DO they work?"
 "Because different humans know how make the individual pieces and other humans like me know how to put them together so they work."
 >"Kind of like an orchestra?"
 "What do you mean?"
 >"Well, everypony knows a different instrument that the others probably can't play. They use music composed by another pony and they are 'put together' by a conductor"
 "That is actually a really good metaphor, couldn't have said it better myself"
 >Cookies smiles and scoots herself into you
 >Now was your chance to change the subject!
 > before she asked questions about your world you couldn't tell her the answers to
 "So I've heard the basics of how this world works from Twilight, and I've read the books in the library about this world's history and sciences but there are a few questions I still have"
 >"Such as?"
 "well, why don't pony families always share a last name?"
 >"Is that common where you're from?"
 >Damn, back to earth
 "Yes, family names are important in my world. Some people would...be very protective of their familial name. Now answer my question"
 >Smooth
 >"Well, parents will name their children with the family name.  If the family is really tight then they'll keep the exact same name. If they want more individuality, its common to use a similar name to your family name or one that relates to your cutie mark"
 "Like 'Sparkle' and 'Shining'?"
 >"Exactly!"
 "And if the pony wants to have a lot of individuality?"
 >"...Then they'll just create a new name for themselves, though that is a rarity"
 "Huh."
 >"mhmm"
 "How about you?"
 >"W-what do you mean?"
 >Your hand disengages from her belly to touch gently at her flank
 "Did you rename yourself after your cutie mark or did you keep a family name?"
 >"I renamed myself after my cutie mark, but my name is still similar to my family name"
 "So how'd you get your cutie mark? And why did you become a prison guard? Most guards here have something related to law enforcement as their mark, like sheriff stars or handcuffs"
 >"Well, the story starts with my sister getting hers"
 "Alright, and?..."
 >You smile encouragingly at her as she turns her head to you with a blush
 >"My family owns a pastry shop in a little village. My sister got three cookies as a cutie mark when she won a baking competition."
 "Did you participate?"
 >"I got fifth place. My cookies were hard as rocks.  My sister always was a better cook than me."
 "Still, fifth place isn't bad"
 >"There were only six ponies in the competition. The sixth didn't even show up, so I got fifth by default"
 >ouch
 >poor girl seems down... better get her back to how she got her mark
 >You give her another squeeze
 "So how did you get yours?"
 >She turns to rub her face into your chest
 >"I so desperately wanted my cutie mark , and was so depressed when my sister beat me AND got her cutie mark that I didn't bother trying to sell my cookies after the competition. I packed up and left while my sister was selling all of her cookies."
 >you pull up your hand to scratch behind her ears and she lets out a little sigh
 >"While I was walking home, I stopped by the old ponies home to visit my Grandma. Nana Chocolate Clusters could always cheer me up."
 >She gives a little laugh
 >"When I got there, it was snack time and they had run out of treats. My Grandma suggested I share my cookies with everypony who was hungry. I tried to tell them my cookies were no good but my Grandma just told me they were fine because I had made them with love and determination. They would be good cookies because I had poured my passion into them"
 "And did the senior ponies enjoy your baking?"
 >"Buck no, one of them broke their dentures!"
 >you felt bad for laughing, but she laughed too
 >"I was ready to give up entirely on ever getting my cutie mark, but my grandma wouldn't let me lose hope. She kept trying to chew through that petrified pastry."
 >She smiles fondly at the memory
 >"I didn't want to disappoint her, so I went to grab something to help her wash it down, I ended up spilling an entire pitcher of milk over the tray of cookies"
 "So the cookies were ruined?"
 >"Exact opposite. They became just soggy enough for the old ponies to eat, while still remaining solid enough to be picked up"
 "So your special talent is making soggy cookies?"
 >She laughs and turns enough to poke you with a hoof
 >"Not quite, my cutie mark represents my willingness to help others and make their lives easier"
 "That's...beautiful, actually"
 >her heartbeat speeds up
 >"T-Thanks..."
 "So how did you end up working as a guard, and not a nurse or aide in the old ponies home?"
 >"well, I figured that if anypony needed their lives to be better it would be the criminals that everypony else either dislikes or is too afraid of to help"
 >this mare, man.
 "You really are something special"
 >she giggles
 >"so are you"
 "Only because I'm an alien. You, however, have a heart of solid gold!"
 >She wriggles in closer to you
 "And a butt with soggy cookies permanently marked on it!"
 >She laughs and pokes you again
 >life is good
 
 
 >The two of you continued talking on and off for a few more hours, until lights out when Cookies had to leave for her own home
 >on her way out, she sets down the empty pudding cup and spoon on the floor and turns to you
 >"Hey Anon..."
 "Yea Cookies?"
 >She looks away from you, blushing
 >"You really are special, not just because you are unique. I mean, you are special to me"
 >You smile warmly at her
 "I love you too, Cookies"
 >She makes a squeaky sound, hurriedly picks up the trash and darts out of your room
 >That mare, man...
 >That mare
 >You fall asleep with a grin
 
 Be Anon
 >Be next morning
 >Life is good!
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6Sxv-sUYtM
 >Even sang a little in the shower
 >You practically dance down the halls
 >Some inmates would point and murmur to each other about your odd behavior
 >You couldn't care less
 >because, life is good
 >Yes, you are happy!
 >You nod to Sleepy as you pass him in the hall
 >He didn't see it
 >He was napping under the drinking fountain
 >Oh well, his loss
 >You come to a turn in the hall
 >You let your left leg wrap around your right and then snap it forward...
 >...at the perfect time to coincide with a ninety degree spin on your toes
 >You let yourself fall forward onto your left foot, turning the motion into a little skip as you continue to walk down the hall
 >It's good to be loved
 >Nothing could bring you down right now!
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be worried out of your mind
 >You were on the verge of tearing out your mane!
 >You had heard rumors that Anon was acting oddly and moving erratically
 >Obviously he was severely ill!
 >You had to find him, but he was wandering the halls seemingly at random
 >every time you thought you were on the right track, somepony would tell you Anon was on the other side of the prison!
 >You were about to call a full on search with all the guards and even the inmates for bonus brownie points when you heard the sounds of irregular footsteps behind you
 >ANON!
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iV2ViNJFZC8
 >Oh sweet Celestia, it was worse than you thought!
 >"Howdy Warden!"
 >He's never greeted you so warmly before...
 >HE NEEDS IMMEDIATE MEDICAL ATTENTION!
 >You desperately try and pull Anon towards the nurses office
 >"Warden, what are you doing?"
 "Don't worry Anon, you'll be ok! YOU HEAR ME?! YOU WILL MAKE IT"
 >"Silly color horse"
 >ITS GETTING WORSE
 >you need to get him taken care of NOW
 >"Is widdle Warden horsie worried abouwt po wittle hooman?"
 >HE'S LOSING THE ABILITY TO SPEAK!
 >Anon just laughs as you continue panicking
 >You /somehow/ manage to corral him into the nurses office
 >after more gibberish and flailing limbs, of course
 >Poor dear must be so scared!
 >"Morning Warden, what brings you and Anon here?"
 "Nurse Honey Heart! Anon is sick!"
 >Anon scoffs
 >"No I'm not"
 "Yes you are!"
 >The nurse steps between you and Anon
 >"I'll be the judge of that"
 >"I'm telling you, I'm fine"
 "He's delirious!"
 >"Quiet! Both of you! Now, what are the symptoms?"
 "He's smiling and greeted me first this morning!"
 >The nurse just stares at you
 "HE DOESN'T USUALLY DO THAT!"
 >"Alright, any other symptoms?"
 "His arms and legs are moving crazy-like!"
 >"They are not 'crazy-like'"!
 >The nurse presses her hoof to her face
 
 Be Nurse Honey Heart
 >Be examining Anon
 >Who keeps telling you he is just fine
 >So why are you examining him?
 >Because The Warden thinks he's sick
 >And The Warden writes your paycheck
 >You probably wouldn't be able to help Anon if he was sick
 >You don't mean to sound racist, but The Warden might have better luck with a veterinarian
 "Heart beat is a little slow, but he is bigger than a pony so that is no cause for worry..."
 >You have him stick out his tongue
 "Teeth are healthy and mouth shows no signs of infection"
 >You press a hoof against his stomach
 "Does this hurt?"
 >"nope"
 "How about when I press here?"
 >"Nada"
 "anything here?"
 >"You sunk my battleship!"
 >The Warden jumps and points at Anon, panic plain as day across her face
 "What?"
 >"Nothing, human joke"
 >You sigh
 > this is going nowhere
 >You grab a bottle of sugar pills from one of the cabinets
 "Warden, do you know what a Placebo is?"
 >"No, what is it?"
 "Powerful medication, Anon should be fine if he takes these pills each morning. His symptoms should stop "
 >You looked Anon straight in the eyes, to make sure he got the idea
 >"Wow! Thanks so much! I owe you one for saving Anon!"
 >Anon just rolls his eyes
 >The Warden bounces out of the room, singing about the joys of modern medicine
 >Several inmates join in
 >Anon leans towards you
 >"I can't believe she bought that"
 "Thanks for not telling her I was lying. She'd have me here all night trying to 'heal' you if she hadn't fallen for that"
 >"Neither of us wants that"
 >You laugh
 "Just try not to do whatever it was that got her pulling you into my office in the first place. Doctor's orders"
 >"Doctor who?"
 "Actually I'm only a nurse, but you get the idea"
 
 
 Be Anon
 >You miss people understanding your references
 "Well, thanks miss Honey Heart"
 >"You can just call me 'Honey'"
 >Well that could get all kinds of awkward real fast
 "Compromise, how about Nurse Heart?"
 >She laughs
 >"That'll do. Now if you'll excuse me, I have paperwork to take care of"
 >You nod and leave her office
 >Well that was a good way to waste an hour
 >Better get back to your room
 >Cookies will be there soon to chaperone your breakfast
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be happy
 >Also be super nervous
 >Anon said he loved you!
 >EXCITEMENT!
 >But what if you screw up and he starts hating you?
 >PANIC
 >No, don't panic, you got this.
 >What if you don't?
 >BUT YOU DO
 >....right?
 >As your internal debate continues, you notice The Warden hop-walking towards you
 "Morning Ma'am"
 >"Hiya Cookies! Guess what!"
 "What is it, Ma'am?"
 >"I SAVED ANON'S LIFE TODAY!"
 "WHAT!?"
 >"Anon was really sick but didn't realize it. So I made him go to nurse Honey Heart to get better"
 "H-How bad is it?"
 >"It was really bad, he was talking in gibberish!"
 "REALLY!?"
 >What if /you/ made him sick?
 >Could your nose-kiss have infected him?
 >"Yea! He couldn't move normally either, his legs were wiggling and wobbling EVERYWHERE!"
 >OH SWEET CELESTIA, YOU ALMOST KILLED YOUR COLTFRIEND!
 "Where is he now?!"
 >"He kept saying he was perfectly healthy, but I knew better! I made nurse Honey Heart give him pills to make him better!"
 "Thank you, good job, now where is he?"
 >"Which is good, I knew he wasn't feeling well the moment he greeted me"
 "WARDEN!"
 >"Y-Yes Cookies?"
 "Where... is... ANON?!"
 >"Last I saw, he was still at the Nurse's office"
 >You don't bother to thank her for the information
 >You just rush to the nurse's office
 >You don't bother knocking when you arrive
 >You push the door open and your eyes dart around the room
 >No Anon
 >One nurse
 >One nurse who might know where Anon went!
 "Nurse Honey! Do you know where Anon is? I heard he's sick!"
 >Nurse Honey Heart puts a hoof to her face
 >"Anon is fine. I however, could use a stiff cider"
 "What?"
 >"Anon wasn't sick, he just seemed more energetic than usual."
 "Then why did you give him pills!?"
 >"Those were sugar pills, placebos, they won't do anything"
 >Ok, alright, so Anon isn't dying because of you
 >That's good
 "Do you know where he is now?"
 >"No, but he left about ten minutes ago"
 "Well... thanks for the information"
 >Anon could be practically anywhere in the prison...
 >But he is healthy, so that removes some of your panic
 >Nurse Honey just stares at you, and slowly raises an eyebrow
 >"Is there anything else? No mysterious rashes or itching? Sneezing? Coughing?"
 "No,  I'm healthy"
 >"Then what are you still doing here? I've had enough distraction already with Anon and The Warden, I'm already looking at staying late without further interruption"
 "Sorry... I'll leave you to your work"
 >"Thank you"
 >She gives a curt nod as you leave
 >She could be so rude, despite her sweet name
 >No wonder she couldn't keep a private practice
 >That was a mean thought, you'd have to be nice to her later to make up for it
 >But for now, you had to find Anon
 >In addition to wanting to check on him yourself...
 >...It was almost time for breakfast
 
 Be Anon
 >Be in your room
 >Mental note: don't dance in the halls
 >or near The Warden
 >or anywhere really
 >You were not exactly known for your amazing moves back home
 >You check the clock
 >Cookies should be here by now
 >What could be taking her so long?
 >Maybe you better go look for her?
 >You step out of your room
 >The hall is completely empty
 >one light flickers off
 >eerie
 >You start walking towards the Mess, maybe she would already be there?
 >As you turn the corner, you are knocked to the ground
 >"OHNOANONAREYOUOK?!"
 >Only slightly dazed, you notice Cookies standing over you and you chuckle
 >ah, it was Cookies who ran into you
 >A very distraught Cookies
 "Anyone catch the Cutie Mark on the bus that hit me?"
 >"I'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRY!"
 >Wait, what did she say?
 >She is practically shouting
 >"IDIDN'TMEANTOHURTYOUI'MSORRY!"
 "Woah woah, slow down there. I'm fine, I'm not hurt"
 >You gently push her aside and stand up
 >You strike a pose with jazz hands
 "Perfectly healthy, not a scratch on me"
 >"But you could have gotten really hurt!"
 "Even if I had been, it was an accident. No biggie"
 >"Y-you don't hate me then?"
 >You do a double take
 >She was serious
 >Poor girl was one wrong word away from waterworld
 "Don't be so silly, how could I ever hate something as adorable as you?"
 >Danger averted, tears neutralized
 >"I was worried that I made you sick..."
 "Why would you think that?"
 >"The Warden said you were sick, then the nurse said you weren't! I was really worried and I couldn't find you!"
 "I've been waiting in my room since leaving the nurse's office. I was a little worried that you were getting so late"
 >"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you..."
 "So why did you think that /you/ made me sick?"
 >"Because....I... I..."
 >She takes a breath
 >" kissedyournoselastnight!"
 >You chuckle and scratch her ear
 "If pony saliva made me sick, don't you think I'd have gotten sick a long time ago?"
 >"What do you mean?"
 "Ponies carry /everything/ in their mouths. I don't even want to know how you ponies clean dishes"
 >You beam a grin at her
 >She gives a weak little smile
 >She's still feeling down
 >You glance around the halls
 >Everyone is already at the mess
 >You two are alone
 >you kneel down and give her a peck on her forehead
 >She practically melts
 >You didn't know a pony /could/ turn that color
 >...neat!
 >"I...but....you...wait....what?....I don't.....huh?"
 >Fascinating!
 >She can't complete a thought
 >Will that happen every time you do that?
 >You'll have try it again in a more private setting
 >...for the sake of scientific research, of course
 >The sign of a good study IS repeatable results, after all
 >Your stomach grumbles
 >Oh yea, breakfast!
 >The sound was enough to knock Cookies out of her stupor
 >"You must be starving! Come on, let's get food in you!"
 >you pat her head and nod
 "Yes please!"
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be confused
 >Where are your friends?
 >Anon and Cookies always beat you to the mess
 >You had secured a nice table near the heaters
 >Being warmed while eating is very relaxing
 >Not knowing where your friends are isn't relaxing
 >Maybe they overslept?
 >You might have to go looking for them
 >Which would cut into your nap time
 >...
 >Maybe you should see the nurse about how much you sleep
 >Nah, you're fine
 >Besides, that would be a lot of work
 >Oh hey, there they are
 >You watch as Cookies escorts Anon to the lunch ponies to get their meals
 >Huh, they seem...off
 >Anon is failing to hide a slight limp
 >He must have slept on his leg funny
 >Cookies looks frazzled
 >She must need a nap
 >That must be it
 >No other explanation
 >They move away from the counter and scan the mess
 >you wave them over
 "Morning"
 >"Why good morning Sleepy, glad to see you bright-eyed and bushy-tailed"
 >You nod back at Anon
 >He used weird expressions
 >"Yes, good morning Sleepy"
 >They sit across from you
 >They start eating and talking about nothing in particular
 "Hey Anon."
 >He looks surprised that you spoke
 >"yea?"
 "What are human beds like?"
 >He laughs
 >"Of course you would ask that"
 "What is that supposed to mean?"
 >"eh...nothing, forget about it.  Well, for starters, human beds are bigger"
 >Cookies perks up, curious about Earth and Humans in general
 >"What else?"
 >"You know how the bed in my cell is three times normal pony sized beds?"
 >"sure"
 "Well, that bed is on the smallish side by human standards"
 >How can any one being handle so much bed?
 >"My bed here is also significantly softer than I was used to back on earth"
 >"But you have the hardest bed in the prison!"
 >"Really? First time I sat on it, I thought I was sinking"
 >Anon laughs and you smile
 >So humans make beds that are giant and hard
 >You prefer soft beds
 >Anon opens up his pudding cup and dips in a carrot
 >That reminds you...
 "Thanks again for the pudding the other day"
 >"Don't mention it, it was worth it to get The Warden off my back"
 >You nod
 >The Warden usually had too much energy for your tastes
 >Speaking of tastes, Anon had pudding again as his breakfast dessert
 "Do you always get pudding?"
 >"Yup, I really enjoy the stuff. Though I do love cookies too"
 >Cookies chokes on her milk
 >She coughs and throws Anon a glance
 >Anon just laughs
 >"Chocolate chip cookies go great with pancakes, you know"
 >Huh, Cookies looks frazzled again.
 > Choking on something will do that to a pony
 >Anon smiles and loudly sips his juice
 >"Hey Cookies"
 >"Yes, Anon?"
 >"Would you mind reading me another bedtime story tonight? Last night was the best night's sleep I've ever had"
 >Huh, Cookies is blushing a little
 >She must not be asked to read bedtime stories much
 >"S-sure thing Anon"
 >You focus on your meal as the others do the same
 >There is some light conversation, but the rest of breakfast passes without any major incidents
 
 Be Cookies
 >You'd have to remember to scold Anon for pulling that stunt in the mess
 >Saying he loved 'cookies'....
 >Not that you didn't love hearing him say it
 >But still, that was dangerous
 >You made your way back to the guardhouse, where you are now
 >Let's see, where did The Warden post you today?...
 >Lifeguard duty, nice!
 >The pool was indoor and the room's temperature was carefully regulated
 >No pony would be there for at LEAST an hour
 >Everypony /did/ just eat breakfast, after all
 >You pick up the lifeguard's pack and head towards the changing room
 >Couldn't be a proper lifeguard without a swimsuit on
 >Once properly attired, you head to the pool
 >Even from here, you could faintly smell the chlorine in the pool
 >You unlock the glass door and trot over to the lifeguard's chair
 >With nothing to do for now, you pull out a book from the lifeguard's pack and start relaxing
 >Easiest post first thing in the morning...
 >More Anon tonight...
 >Today would be a good day!
 
 Be Anon
 >Maybe you overdid it with that tease during breakfast
 >You'd have to apologize to Cookies later
 >You walk back towards your cell with Sleepy
 >Turns out he's in the same cell block, just around a different corner
 >"What are human pillows made of?"
 >well that question came out of left field
 >....
 >well, it WAS Sleepy who was asking
 >So not totally out of nowhere
 "They are made of.."
 >What were pillows made of?
 >You knew they usually had a cotton case
 >but what were they filled with?
 >poly-fiber-whatsit blend probably
 "Cotton and synthetic materials"
 >Nailed it
 >"Doesn't sound comfortable"
 "Why do you say that?"
 >"'synthetic' is such a harsh word, harsh things have harsh names"
 "sure..."
 >"Not like down feathers, they have a soft name. I make my own pillows. They are softer than a good dream. I've even modified the design to block out sound so I can sleep even when ponies are being loud around me"
 >That actually sounds nice
 "I'd love to try one of your pillows sometime. They sound great"
 >"They are, each one is hoof made and carries a part of me"
 "Sounds like you really work hard on them, pour your heart into making each one?"
 >"Yes. I also meant they are padded with my own down"
 >wut?
 "What?"
 >He stretches out  a wing and carefully extracts a single downy feather with his mouth
 >"Feel thith"
 >Just roll with it
 >you reach out a hand and gently pinch the down
 >That was soft
 >really soft
 >Like a tiny cloud
 >not made of water droplets
 >So nothing like a cloud
 >Damn, it's so soft you can't even think of a good metaphor
 >A whole pillow made of this stuff?
 >And his wings must feel like blankets wrapped around him at all times
 >No wonder he was always so tired
 >Bit weird sleeping on a pillow made from your friend
 >But if a whole pillow is /anything/ like a single feather...
 "Now I really want one!"
 >Sleepy smiles
 >A smile that says 'of course you do'
 >"It will cost you"
 >Of course it would
 "Name your price"
 >"Your next three pudding cups, but only because I like you. I'd normally charge seven"
 >Is he for real?
 >Screw that, there is no way you are giving up THREE meals worth of desserts!
 "That's too rich for my blood, no dea-"
 >Wait...
 >You stop walking
 >Can't walk when serious decisions are being made
 >A pillow like that would make a great gift for Cookies
 >A gift to apologize for teasing her earlier
 >A gift that would earn you stupid amounts of brownie points with her
 >especially once she knew what you gave up for it
 >Sleepy just watches you, with a perfect poker face
 >He has nerves of steel!
 >...and wings of angel farts
 >Screw it, there will always be more dessert
 >You'd pay the piper's price, but it will be something to make Cookies happy
 "Fine, you got yourself a deal"
 >He extends a hoof
 >You shake it
 >With the deal struck, you continue towards your cell block
 "So how long will it take to make the pillow?"
 >"A couple days at least"
 >As you approach the bend in the hall near your room, you hear a pair of voices
 >"-ook Club!"
 >You could recognize that voice anywhere
 >The Warden
 >"I really, honestly, have no idea where Anon is"
 >You didn't recognize that voice, however
 >probably just some poor inmate
 >...That The Warden cornered to ask about your whereabouts
 >For an '-ook club'
 >This can only end with tears
 >Your inner child is already crying
 >ABORT RETURN MISSION, HQ IS COMPROMISED!
 >without missing a beat, you silently pivot on your heel and start a brisk walk in the opposite direction
 >As you do, you and Sleepy wave goodbye to each other
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be engrossed in your book
 >It's a war novel
 >The last great incursion into Celestia's kingdom
 >Also known as the Great Pillow Fight
 >The sheer brutality of it cost thousands of pillows their stuffing
 >It really was a fascinating read
 >You are interrupted by the sound of the door to the pool room opening
 >What? Everypony knows you aren't supposed to swim right after a meal, who could-?
 >"Howdy Cookies"
 "Anon! I wasn't expecting to see you here"
 >You day just got a little brighter
 >"I wasn't expecting to see me here either. I'm hiding from The Warden because /someone/ volunteered me for book club."
 >oops
 >he can't really be mad about that, can he?
 >you did say you were sorry, after all!
 "I said I was sorry..."
 >Anon grins
 >"Don't worry about it, I'm just giving you a hard time. Say, why is the pool empty?"
 "It's only been fifteen minutes since breakfast, everypony knows you need to wait at LEAST thirty minutes after eating to go swimming.  Most ponies will wait an hour, just to be safe"
 >"Really? So we have the room to ourselves for an hour?"
 "Yup!"
 >You smirk
 "Why do you ask, inmate? Thinking of cuddle-assaulting an on-duty guard?"
 >Please say yes
 >"I might... If it weren't for that glass door. It'd be too easy to be caught by someone just wandering by"
 >aw horse feathers
 >He's right
 >"However, I might take a swim while the pool is empty"
 "You can't do that! You just ate! You might cramp!"
 >"I like to live dangerously"
 >You give Anon an uncertain look
 >"Relax, it'll take more than a lot of water to take me down.  Are there any spare swimming trunks?"
 >You point towards the stallion's changing room
 "There should be a few spares in there, but they were designed for ponies.  There might be a few designed for minotaurs though"
 >Anon taps his fingers to the side of his head in a little salute and walks into the changing room
 >Alone with a wet, shirtless Anon?
 >You'll have some of that, yes please!
 >Even if you can't touch...
 >You can still look
 >In fact, it is your job to look
 >Your day just got a whole lot brighter
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be in the changing room
 >Be the wrong shape for all these spare trunks
 >And why did they ALL need a hole in the back?!
 >...
 >Oh yea, tails
 >Ponies had those
 >And so did minotaurs
 >Screw it, worst case scenario: Cookies gets an eyeful
 >And you had a gift in the pipeline that would more than make up for any mental trauma
 >It'd better, you were losing a metric assload of pudding over it
 >You manage to find a pair of trunks that fit well enough
 >You pull on the trunks and tie them tightly
 >The hole fits perfectly over your tailbone
 >You grab a towel from a closet in the changing room and walk out
 >Cookies looks up from her book and stows it away in a waterproof bag
 >Lifeguard can't be reading while someone was in the pool
 >Especially if they are at risk of cramping
 >You toss your towel onto a lawn chair
 >Cookies is watching you like a hawk
 >You smirk
 >Might as well give her a little show
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be watching Anon
 >Ever since you first laid eyes on him, you'd been interested in how he moved
 >How he was able to balance on those two long legs
 >How he turned and how his fingers wriggled
 >Part of the reason you had volunteered to be his chaperone at mealtime
 >Even after spending so much time with him, his body could still surprise you as he moved in completely new ways
 >The first time you saw him scratch his back, for example
 >apropos of nothing his arm had flipped around as he contorted his body to reach an itch
 >It was the kind of maneuver no pony could ever hope to recreate
 >Pony joints just weren't built for that
 >You watch as Anon tosses his towel onto a chair and smirks
 >You know that smirk
 >That's his 'I think I'm more clever than I actually am' smirk
 >His 'I am going to tease Cookies' smirk
 >That is a dangerous smirk
 >You watch as he begins to contort and stretch
 >You've never seen him stretch before!
 >This'll be good
 >He starts with some pretty basic arm stretches, holding his left arm across his chest and pulling it farther with the crook of his right arm
 >Then the other side
 >After holding the pose for a few second, he...
 >woah...
 >weird
 >He flipped his right arm around the back of his head, forearm pointing down behind his back. His left hand pushing down on the right's elbow
 >Just look at how his muscles move under his skin!
 >He flips arm positions
 >Neat
 >Looks like he finished with arm stretches
 >He places his left hand on his hip, the other straight up...
 >and leans sideways, right arm pointing left
 >How does he balance standing like that?
 >He reverses to stretch his other side the same way
 >He glances over at you and his smirk returns tenfold
 >You can feel the heat in your cheeks increase exponentially
 >Anon spreads his legs and begins to lean to his left
 >His left leg bends and bends as his right leg stretches straight and long
 >Never breaking eye contact
 >He holds the position for several long seconds
 >with a small grunt he stands straight again
 >...and leans the other way
 >You hear the door opening as somepony walks in
 >It was The Warden
 >"Anon, there you are! I thought you were interested in joining book clu-"
 >Anon's left leg reaches full stretch
 >A resounding *CRACK* echoes around the empty room
 >Anon's expression contorts with surprise and a little pain
 >"OH CELESTIA HE BROKE HIS LEG"
 >You KNEW those movements weren't natural!
 >The Warden's eyes go wide with shock, then slowly cloud over...
 >Anon's gaze shoots to The Warden
 >...and she promptly falls flat on her side, stiff as a board
 >You were on your own
 >Anon stands straight, and shakes his left leg
 "Anon, are you alright?!"
 >He just laughs
 >"I'm fine, just cracked my leg is all"
 >BY TIREK'S TIN TEETH, HE FRACTURED HIS LEG!
 >Don't panic!
 >DON'T PANIC
 >First things first, gotta get Anon off that injured leg!
 >How can he even /stand/ with an injury like that?!
 >You jump out of your chair and rush to Anon's side
 "What are you doing still standing?! SIT! That is an ORDER!"
 >Anon gives you a confused look and walks over to a chair
 >Walks over to a chair
 >walks
 >Just what kind of creature could snap bone and just casually walk around?!
 >Anon sits down and you set about trying to find where the fracture occurred in his leg
 >You press against his leg, trying to find a spot that didn't move right
 >There! Right at the knee, a huge chunk of bone was just /floating/ in his leg!
 >Anon's eyes flicker between you and The Warden, confusion and trepidation clear on his face
 >He must be in such pain that he's going into shock!
 >Gotta keep him lucid!
 "You are going to be FINE! We'll get through this together, just stay with me!"
 >"What are you talking about? Cookies, The Warden is right there!"
 >Good, he can focus on details still!
 "That's right Anon, The Warden is there! FOCUS ON THAT! I'll go get help for your leg!"
 >"Wait, what the what? I'm fine, just cracked my leg is all"
 "FRACTURES ARE SERIOUS! Especially leg fractures! You are delirious, so DON'T MOVE. I'll be back soon with help!"
 >"What? I didn't- My leg is fine! see?"
 >Anon stands up and does a little jig
 >You can only stare in horror
 >If he kept this up, he could injure himself beyond recovery
 "INMATE ANONYMOUS, SIT BACK DOWN IMMEDIATELY"
 >He complies and sits back down with a sigh
 >"I'm really fine, human joints sometimes just pop like that"
 >Wait...what?!
 >"Watch this, I'll prove it"
 >Anon then proceeds to press his hands together...
 >*SNAP*
 >*CRACKLE*
 >*POP*
 >Each finger has it's turn, letting out a sickening sound as it's siblings apply pressure
 >You let out a little whimper
 >Anon finishes the final digit and then wiggles his fingers around
 >"See? No harm done. I'm Just fine. Humans call that 'cracking our knuckles' because of the sound it makes"
 "But what about how loud it was?! And you were in pain! And I felt a loose bone in your leg!"
 >"Knees are a lot bigger than finger joints, and make a bigger sound. I was just surprised when it happened. I didn't really get any warning! Sure, big joints can hurt a little when they crack but it's nothing I can't walk off. As for the 'loose bone' in my leg, that would be my kneecap. It's supposed to be like that"
 "R-Really?"
 >"Eeyup, remember how it was my left leg that cracked?"
 >Anon punctuates the question by moving his kneecap under the skin
 >"Well, watch closely"
 >He repeats the action, with his other leg
 >It looked like he had hidden biscuits under his skin he was playing with
 >"Cracking joints are perfectly normal for humans. Even joints in legs. Back home, I had a friend who could even crack his neck on command!"
 >Anon chuckles
 >You feel sick
 >"Now, what are we going to do about her?"
 >Anon points to The Warden
 >"We can't just leave her like that"
 >He's right
 "I'll get a couple guards in here to take her to nurse Honey Heart"
 >"That could take a while, and I want to swim! How about I carry her there?"
 "That'll work, but at least put a shirt on first. I'll watch her until you're ready"
 >Once Anon redresses himself appropriately, he picks up The Warden
 "Alright, I'll escort you there"
 >You weren't sure Anon really was ok, and you wanted to make sure his leg didn't go out from beneath him
 >He tucks The Warden under an arm as you both leave the pool room
 >You re-lock the door on the way out
 >Couldn't let anypony in the pool while the lifeguard was away
 >As you both walk through the halls, curious inmates begin to follow behind
 >When you finally reach the nurse's office, you have a small crowd following
 >"Will The Warden be alright?"
 >"I hope so, she's so nice!"
 >"Everypony in the Book Club is waiting for her, I hope she gets better soon!"
 >The crowd continues to mumble and express worry for the fallen leader
 >Anon pushes into the office and you follow behind
 >The crowd tries to file in as well
 >The nurse's office was not designed to hold thirty ponies and a human
 "Sorry folks, you'll all have to wait outside. We'll tell you how The Warden is doing as soon as we can"
 >The crowd grumbles but disperses
 >You close the door and look around the office
 >Honey Heart isn't here
 >Anon set The Warden down on a table
 "Where is the nurse?"
 >Anon shrugs
 "Well...now what?"
 >"We've done all we can. She'll be fine, and Nurse Heart will probably be right back"
 "We can't just leave The Warden here without /some/ explanation!"
 >"hrm... you're right...."
 >Anon furrows his brow
 >"I got it, we'll leave a note"
 "Good idea"
 >"You should get back to your post, I'll meet you back at the pool miss lifeguard"
 >Anon winks at you
 >Why must Anon be such a tease?
 >And why do you like it so much?
 "Alright, I'll see you there"
 >"Yea you will!"
 >You duck your head to hide your blush as you hurry back to the pool room, past a few lingering inmates
 >After waiting for a few minutes, Anon walks back into the pool room
 >"Now where were we?..."
 >His smirk returns
 >He tosses his shirt on top of the same chair his towel has been lying on
 >...And he begins to bend and stretch his core
 >"Also, I liked how forceful you were earlier. You can order me around anytime"
 >He wiggles his eyebrows at you
 >You feel yourself blushing again
 >This human could be so ridiculous sometimes
 
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Be coming back from the little fillies' room
 >Your morning coffee always went straight through you
 >You notice a few inmates loitering around your office
 >"Thank goodness you're back!"
 >"Something is wrong with The Warden!"
 >"Anon and Cookies brought her here a few minutes ago"
 >"Please help her!"
 >It was too early for this
 >You nod to the inmates, promising to do your best and enter your office
 >The door closes behind you and you look to the examination table to see The Warden lying perfectly still
 >With a note taped to her face
 >You use your horn to levitate the note over
 >'Out Of Order'
 >....'signed, with humblest apologies, Anon'
 >Oh for buck's sake
 >It was too early for this too
 >It was /always/ too early for this
 >You walk over to the table and shine a light into The Warden's eyes
 >Her eyes contracted
 "Good, so she doesn't have a head injury..."
 >You carefully bend her leg
 >It maintains its new position just as rigidly as before
 > Even her mane and tail were rigid
 "Probably just in shock from....something"
 >Easy enough to wake her up, just need some smelling salts
 >You open up a cupboard and levitate a small metal capsule over to the table
 >You magically twist off the cap and shake the capsule under The Warden's nose
 "Now, Warden, how are you fee-"
 >Her eyes snap into focus
 >She takes a deep breath
 >"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
 "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
 >"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
 "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
 
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be trying to nap
 >keyword: trying
 >Until just recently, you /were/ napping
 >But then somepony started screaming
 >Didn't they know some ponies were trying to sleep?
 >Ponies could be so inconsiderate sometimes
 >You pull one of your homemade pillows over your ears and the sound immediately disappears
 >Ah, much better
 >You wrap yourself up tighter in your blankets and fall back asleep...
 >Completely missing muted sounds followed by nurse Honey Heart screaming
 >"OH CELESTIA ITS EVERYWHERE"
 
 Be Mop Bucket
 >Be the janitor
 > Sitting in the boiler room
 >With a copy of your favorite magazine
 >'Levitated Mares'
 >This is the yearly fluffy issue
 >Life is good
 >You lick a hoof, and turn a page
 >Your facial hair made wetting your hoof difficult
 >you always had more hair around your face than most Stallions
 >Which led to your nickname
 >There is a banging on the door and a guard rushes in
 >"Scruffy, we need you! The Warden just woke up and started screaming and then got sick all over the nurses office!"
 >No pony could do what you did
 >You were one of a kind
 >You annihilated filth of any kind
 >As was your sacred duty
 >Even if some ponies enjoyed the filth
 >You put down the magazine
 >pick up your equipment
 >and leave your lair
 >May filth on all floorboards tremble in fear
 >Scruffy was on the prowl
 
 Be Anon
 >Be finished with your stretches
 >Time for some swimming!
 >you head for the diving boards
 >There are three of them
 >One barely above the water's surface
 >One a few feet up
 >The last one is by far the highest
 >About eight feet tall
 >For grounded ponies, that must seem stupidly high
 >Good for a human though
 >You head for the 'high' dive
 >"Anon, what do you think you're doing?"
 "...I'm going to dive?"
 >"But that is the high dive!"
 "You have excellent eyesight"
 >She scrunchies as you climb the steps to the diving board
 >"Beginners shouldn't jump from there!"
 "Don't worry, monkeys are better swimmers than horses"
 >Cookies watches as you bounce a little on the board
 >You prepare to jump
 >You never got to swim much back on earth
 >You still knew proper diving technique, though
 >You start your jump
 >"Wait! Anon! STOP!"
 "Wha-"
 >Cookies threw off your concentration
 >You lept off with poor form
 >your body is parallel to the water's surface
 >...This will hurt, won't it?
 >You crash into the pool
 >A mighty wave rises from where you impacted
 >...yea, that stung a bit
 >As you surface, you see Cookies already in mid air
 >"DON'T WORRY ANON, I'LL SAVE YOU!"
 >She was coming straight at you
 >You quickly duck back underwater to avoid being smashed by Cookies
 >You hear her submerge above you
 >You feel her quickly maneuver herself underneath you
 >And then she pushes up
 >Forcing you to the surface
 >Not really having a choice in the matter, you resurface
 >Cookies pushes you all the way to the shallow end of the pool
 >To push you all the way across the pool, while underwater...
 >She can really hold her breath!
 >Once you are standing on solid ground, Cookies finally resurfaces
 >She gasps and takes in a huge breath
 >Looks like you were wrong
 >Horses are better swimmers than monkeys
 >She is completely soaked
 >Being underwater tends to do that
 >Her mane is clinging to the back and sides of her head
 >Her normally neat ponytail manestyle has come slightly undone
 >Leaving a wet strand of hair running down the front of her face, right between her eyes
 >"I warned you about how dangerous the high dive is!"
 >You didn't have the heart to tell her she was the one that messed up your dive
 >She's been through a lot of panic today
 >You'll let her have this one
 "You were right, I'm sorry for worrying you"
 >"Just please be more careful"
 "You got it. You really helped me out there. You're my little hero"
 >You punctuate 'hero' by scratching her ears
 >She leans into your hand
 >She looks up at you with the kind of smile that leads directly to diabetes amputations
 >You smile back and retract your hand
 >Can't have someone see you fondling her ears like that
 >She blushes and you both move to the edge of the pool
 >She pulls herself fully out of the pool as you sit back and enjoy the sight
 >The water has tamped down the fur all across her body, making her look ever so slightly smaller than usual even as the swimsuit hugs her form
 >She looks back at you and catches you staring
 >You give her a winning smile
 >She blushes a little more fiercely
 >U-Unf
 > and then does something unexpected
 >She shakes herself dry
 >like a dog
 >Ponies do that?!
 >Water rains down on you as you stand stunned
 >She finishes shaking and gives you a coy little smile
 >The combination is too much, the dissonance between actions too great
 >You burst into laughter
 >Cookies expression changes from blushing and flirty to annoyed and disgruntled
 >Her cheeks puff out as she scrunchies
 >...Which only makes you laugh harder
 >She turns and trots back to the lifeguard's chair and towels herself off
 >You'd have to rub her belly extra tonight to make up for laughing
 >Totally worth it
 >You climb out of the pool and move back towards the deep end
 >Your belly is a little pinker than usual from that belly flop
 >Oh well, at least you got to see Cookies with wet hair because of it
 >....Totally worth it
 >Arriving at the edge of the deep end, you jump right back into the water
 "CANONBALL!"
 >"Augh! ANON! I just got dry!"
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >This whole lifeguard thing wasn't going as planned
 >Well, you /did/ save somepony by swimming
 >So /technically/ it was going as planned
 >Just not as /you/ planned
 >Still, at least Anon is out of the pool again
 >Shirtless
 >soaking wet
 >His hair clings to his head and face
 >The water makes his body shiny
 >U-Unf
 >And he called you his hero while scratching your ears
 >This is why you can't stay mad at him
 >"CANONBALL!"
 >A pigmy tidal wave crashes over you
 >re-soaking you
 "Augh! ANON! I just got dry!"
 >He resurfaces and gives you a sheepish smile
 >"Sorry, didn't think that would splash you"
 >You sigh and begin to re dry yourself
 >"I promise I'll try and splash less and make less of a fuss"
 "Thank you"
 >Anon  turns in the water and begins to swim across the pool
 >You climb back into the lifeguard chair
 >Now that Anon promised not to drown himself or splash you, you can enjoy the view
 >And what a lovely view it is~
 >Though, there is something odd about how he jumped into the pool just now
 "Hey Anon, why'd you yell 'cannonball' when you jumped into the pool?"
 >He freezes
 >Which doesn't work well under normal circumstances
 >In a pool, it's a great way to soak your head
 >Anon quickly resurfaces and wipes the water from his face
 >"A cannonball is a ball of metal or stone launched from a cannon"
 "Why would you need to launch a ball made of something like that?"
 >"...Sometimes you just need a big heavy ball somewhere else"
 >Humans are weird
 "Why not just roll it?"
 >"That would be too slow"
 "Why not have it levitated over?"
 >"No magic, remember?"
 >Oh yeah
 "But isn't it dangerous to launch something like a cannonball?"
 >"That is why cannons are usually used for...forceful partial building deconstruction efforts"
 >Humans are weird
 >You both just watch each other for a few moments
 >Not an awkward silence, but one of silent companionship
 >Anon lets himself sink a little
 >So that only his eyes and forehead are above the waterline
 >He begins to slowly drift along, occasionally lifting his nose enough to take a new breath
 "Anon...What are you doing now?"
 >He tilts his head to keep a low profile while simultaneously lifting his mouth above the water
 >"Ssshhhhh....I'm an alligator. You may call me Alliganon."
 >You laugh
 >"Be very quiet, I'm waiting for prey"
 >You roll your eyes and watch Anon drift for a little longer
 >Oh hey, weren't there pool toys in the pool room's supply closet?
 >Perfect 'prey' for Anon
 >You hop off the lifeguard chair and trot over to the supply closet, near the shallow end
 >This is a pretty big closet
 >Pool noodles for days
 >inflated floaty chairs and pool animals too
 >You just start tossing them into the pool, one by one
 >Anon just lurks in the deep end of the pool
 >watching
 >waiting
 >Scheming
 >A inflatable pig, little more than a glorified ball,  slowly floats towards 'Alliganon'
 >Alliganon sinks slightly lower, only his eyes and forehead above the surface
 >He begins to make his move
 >You watch, mildly amused, as Alliganon stalks the pool toy
 >When he gets close enough, he completely submerges
 >For a moment, all is silent and still
 >Not for long though
 >Alliganon springs out from directly underneath the toy, launching it into the air
 >"ALLIGANON FEEDS NOW!"
 >Alliganon struggles to submerge the pool toy
 >And continues to fail miserably, snarling and growling the entire time
 >Every time Alliganon gets on top of the toy, it rolls
 >Dunking him back into the water
 >You laugh
 >Humans are weird
 >and, probably, especially this human
 >But he was /your/ weird human
 >You turn back to the supply closet as Alliganon continues to thrash about in the water
 >At the very back of the supply closet, there is a cupboard
 >Filled with water wings
 >You browse through the selection and find a pair fit for a minotaur
 >...Or a human
 >This would be your payback for him splashing you
 >You quickly inflate the wings while Alliganon is preoccupied
 >Feeling light headed, you turn back around while carefully keeping the inflated water wings hidden behind you
 >He somehow managed to submerge the inflatable pig
 >And is now lying on top of it
 >"Alliganon was victorious"
 >You giggle
 "I can see that... Could you come here for a moment?"
 >He gives a pained look
 >"But alliganon only JUST became victorious!"
 >You pull the old puppy eyes trick
 >Anon sighs and slowly lets the pig roll over
 >Dumping Anon into the pool
 >He makes his way over to the shallow end of the pool
 >"What's on your mind?"
 "In light of the fact that you could still potentially have a cramp while swimming, as both prison guard and lifeguard, I order you to wear these"
 >You step aside to reveal the water wings in all their bright pink splendor
 >Anon steps out of the pool, and walks closer to scrutinize the water wings
 >He kneels down in front of them, and reverently lifts them up
 >"With these pink water wings, I transcend from Anon... into Penganon!"
 >He dons the wings and shoots you a grin
 >He just turned your attempt to embarrass him into a game
 >You continue to stare at each other for a few seconds
 >Then Penganon begins to lean closer to you
 >Never breaking eye contact
 >It feels like he is staring at your soul
 >From the look on his face, he approves
 >He continues to close in on you
 >Your faces are now mere inches apart
 >You can feel your heartbeat in your ears
 >You can feel the heat in your face
 >Despite the urge to look away, you just can't break from this moment, from his gaze
 >With your faces nearly touching, he stops his approach
 >Was he going to...
 >...kiss you?
 >Your heart begins to flutter in your chest
 >A hundred tiny butterflies take up residence in your belly
 >What was Anon going to do?
 >You bite your lip in anticipation
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >"WENK"
 >wait, what?
 >Anon quickly stands bolt upright and throws his arms behind himself
 >And begins to waddle back towards the pool
 >"WENK WENK WENK"
 >Oh
 >that...
 > bucking...
 > tease!
 >He would have Tartarus to pay tonight before you let him off the hook for this
 >Penganon waddles his way to the edge of the pool and awkwardly dives in
 >You shake your head at the absurdity and return to your chair
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be far more pleased with yourself than you have any right to  be
 >Poor Cookies looked like a deer in headlights when you came in so close
 >You had been tempted to actually kiss her...
 >But that would have ruined the joke
 >Still....
 >Maybe at tonight's cuddle session?
 >That could work
 >For now, you'd have to make it up to her...
 >The only way a Penguin knows how
 >You swim over to a small beach ball floating nearby
 >You push it with your face to the shallow end
 >Once the pool was shallow enough, you stood and carefully balanced the ball on top of your feet
 >You awkwardly shuffle around the pool
 >Doing your best to sound like Gilbert Gottfried the entire time
 "WENK WENK WENK"
 >You shuffle up to the lifeguard's chair and deposit the ball
 >Cookies keeps staring at you
 "WENK"
 >You turn and waddle-hop back to the water for another
 >Pretty soon you have a small pile of inflatable balls at the chairs base
 "WENK WENK"
 >"OH MY CELESTIA STOP"
 >Cookies exasperated expression was betrayed by her laughter and smile
 >"What am I even supposed to do with all these?"
 "WENK"
 >She giggles
 >"You are hopeless, what am I going to do with you?"
 >You WENK suggestively
 >Eyebrow wiggle for good measure
 >And a slight wiggle side to side
 >She bursts into laughter
 >NAILED IT
 >As you continued to wiggle, someone opened up the door
 >"What's going on here?"
 >Cookies looks over to the source of the voice, and you turn to follow her gaze
 >A light brown pony in overalls is standing across the pool from you
 >That pony has an impressive mustache
 >"Just look at this mess. I'm closing the pool until I can get this cleaned up"
 >Cookies frowns
 >"Aw come on Scruffy, he was just having some fun"
 >"No can do, I need to do my job"
 >Cookies sighs
 >"How long will the pool be closed?"
 >"At least until sometime after lunch"
 >Well then
 >"Come on Anon, let's go"
 >Cookies starts moving towards the door
 >You shake your head
 >You didn't have to take this from a janitor!
 >You were an emperor penguin, after all
 >You puff up your (imaginary) chest feathers
 >This would not fly!
 >Because neither could you!
 "WENK!"
 >"Anon, don't antagonize the janitor! Now take off the floaties so that Scruffy can clean"
 >curses!
 >foiled again!
 >You dejectedly remove your /beautiful/ wings
 >You walk around the pool and give them to Scruffy who deflates them
 >They make a sad 'thrbtbtbt' sound as they die
 >Goodbye, dear friends
 >You let out a small wenk in memorial
 >Welp, the pool was fun while it lasted
 >You go to the changing room to dry yourself and change back into your normal clothes
 >You grab your shirt from the chair you'd tossed it on as you walk out
 >Cookies holds the door for you as you pull on the shirt
 "Now what?"
 >"well, I'm still technically on duty.  So I can't 'read to you'"
 >Darn
 >"As long as I'm pretending to work, I should be fine to do what I want. Want to walk with me on a patrol around the prison?"
 >You were feeling a little tuckered from your pool antics
 >But spending time with Cookies sounded better than napping
 >You just wish you could do both
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >You finally got The Warden to stop retching long enough to learn what had set her off
 >Apparently, Anon had a broken leg
 >Broken legs can lead to crippling long term problems if healed improperly
 >Normally, you'd be rushing to provide aid
 >However, when you asked around about Anon's whereabouts you learned he had been walking with Cookies n Cream
 >Now, you're no doctor for humans...
 >But there is no way any creature could casually stroll around with a broken leg
 >You weren't looking for a potential patient
 >You were looking for answers
 >You begin your hunt at the pool
 >No signs of Anon
 >...
 >That's not entirely true
 >Somepony posted an 'out of order' sign on the door to the pool area
 >Anon's calling card
 >'humblest apologies' your flank
 >The Warden had ordered a full physical for Anon after she heard that he was walking around
 >Now there would be no way you'd be able to finish all the paperwork in your office now
 >You sigh and knock on the glass
 >Scruffy looks up from his magazine, then trots over and opens the door
 >"Ma'am?"
 "I need to find inmate Anon, do you know where he is?"
 >Scruffy nods and points down a hall with a magazine
 "Thank you, but... shouldn't you be cleaning up the mess in there so that ponies can go swimming?"
 >"I'm on break"
 >You don't have time or patience enough for this
 >You turn and hurry down the hall he indicated
 >If you found Anon fast enough then you just might salvage the rest of your workday
 >The smell of chlorine leaves your nostrils as you continue a circuit around the prison
 >You hear laughter
 >Anon's laughter
 >You were close
 >You rush ahead to see Anon beaming with a laughing Cookies
 "ANON!"
 >He jumps, startled
 >"Oh shi-"
 >"LANGUAGE Anon!"
 >Cookies gives him a disapproving look as you close the distance
 "Anon, you're coming with me"
 >"What? Why? What did I do?"
 >You are not going to put up with this
 "You know perfectly well what you did, The Warden thinks you have a snapped leg and now I she's ordered a full checkup on you. Now hurry up and come with me so we can get this over with"
 >Anon lowers his head and sighs
 >"Alright, let's go. Seeya Cookies"
 "Not so fast, Guardsmare Cookies is coming too"
 >Anon and Cookies respond simultaneously
 >"I am?"
 >"She is?"
 "Regulations require that a guard be present during examinations"
 >Anon shrugs and Cookies nods her head
 >The three of you head towards your office
 >Once everyone has finished shuffling in behind you, you close and lock the door
 >Anon takes note of the action
 >"Why'd you lock the door?"
 "Patient confidentiality"
 >"ah, thank you"
 "My pleasure, now strip"
 >Anon blinks
 >Cookies freezes in shock like someone just told her Celestia is a stallion in disguise
 >"Why do you need me to strip?"
 "Can't examine you properly with your clothes on."
 >sighs and begins to take off his shirt
 >"Man, I wish that pickup line worked for me back home"
 "You may keep your underwear on if you feel the need"
 
 Be Cookies
 >You were not prepared for this
 >You could feel your face flushing
 >Your hooves suddenly became /extremely/ interesting
 >Anon gives a helpless chuckle as his shirt hits the floor
 >He reaches down to untie his shoes
 >You were going to be in a small space with a nearly naked Anon
 >You weren't sure how to feel about this
 >Sure, you'd already seen him in a swimsuit that was just as skimpy...
 >But there is something very private about him wearing only underwear
 >The doorknob rattles for a moment behind you
 >The rattling stops and The Warden's voice penetrates the door
 >"Nurse? Did you find Anon?"
 >Honey Heart sighs
 >"Yes Warden, I've found him. We were just about to begin the examination"
 >"Thank goodness! Can you please let me in?"
 >Honey Heart looks at Anon, who shrugs in reply
 >Honey unlocks the door and The Warden nervously walks in
 >Almost like she was expecting to see a grisly injury
 >...which she probably was, now that you think about it
 >"A-Anon... How are you feeling?"
 >"I'm fine, Warden."
 >The Warden relaxes, but only slightly
 >"Cookies, I'd like to be the guard on duty for this examination if you don't mind. I need to know Anon is alright"
 >This was your way out of this awkward situation!
 >Just play it cool
 "I don't mind at all! I hope you enjoy guarding naked Anon!"
 >NAILED IT
 >The Warden was too distressed to notice the odd phrasing
 >"Good, good.. Since the pool is closed could you join the lunch detail? You know how to cook and they are a little short staffed today,  Biscuit Batter went home early"
 "Yes Ma'am, I'll handle it right away!"
 >You quickly make your escape
 >Crisis averted!
 >Your relationship just wasn't ready for a bombshell like that...
 >...But would it really have been that bad?
 >You were mostly naked around him
 >There should be no problems as long as there was no touching involved
 >And he seemed ok with it...
 >Maybe you should have tried to stay?
 >No, that would have been suspicious
 >Maybe someday you'll get another chance
 >You nod and make your way to the cafeteria
 >It may have been a while since you last cooked, and cooking may not be your special talent...
 >But cooking was in your family history!
 >As was your cousin, Cook King
 >These inmates are going to have their minds blown by your cooking.
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be at lunch
 >Cookies n Cream was helping at the counter
 >The Warden was personally chaperoning your lunch
 >She had chosen your food for you, trying to make you eat a more balanced meal
 >You already ate more fruits and vegetables than ever since arriving, all she was really accomplishing was making you eat your least favorite foods
 >Brussels sprouts, bananas, peanut butter,  and milk instead of juice
 >Back home you had no problems drinking milk
 >Back home, chocolate milk was awesome
 >especially after exercise
 >But cows here can talk
 >When you came to prison, you arrived just in time for a fieldtrip
 >To a dairy farm
 >The inmates had all been given milk boxes when you all first arrived at the farm
 >And then you got to meet the individual cow that your milk came from
 >She had offered to let you drink straight from the tap
 >And now you can't look at milk without feeling a little queasy
 >"You have to eat all the bananas, Anon"
 "But why?"
 >The Warden gives you a stern look
 >"You are a monkey. Monkeys eat bananas. You haven't been eating any bananas. You have a lack of bananas"
 "....I'll give you a lack of bananas..."
 >"What was that, Anonymous?"
 "I said I didn't want a rack of bandanas"
 >NAILED IT
 >The Warden just shakes her head
 "Besides, that's racist"
 >"What's racist?"
 "Saying I need to eat bananas because I'm an ape"
 >"No I mean, what's 'racist'?"
 >This is going nowhere fast
 >You sigh
 >The sooner you start eating, the sooner you'll be done eating
 >Bananas, brussels sprouts, and milk...
 >You wouldn't even be able to keep the pudding cup
 >Sleepy had dibs on that
 >At least the peanut butter would be good
 >Except eating that would make you thirsty
 "I /really/ don't like milk. Why can't I have juice?"
 >"You've drank nothing but juices since arriving here. You need the calcium"
 >You poke the milk box
 >The Warden smiles motherly
 >"Anon, please eat"
 >You frown
 "No, I don't like milk or bananas"
 >She frowns
 >" Anonymous, I need  you to eat"
 "You're not my real chaperone!"
 >The Warden sighs
 >"We've been over this Anon, Cookies is needed in the kitchens."
 >Sleepy arrives at the table and gives you a nod
 >You silently hand over the one good part of your meal
 >You look longingly at Sleepy's plate
 >He had a couple apples, an orange, and a peanut butter toast sandwich
 >Wait... toast?
 "I didn't know they served toast at lunch"
 >"They don't. I wanted a normal sandwich"
 >Then why was the bread burnt?
 >...
 >Oh
 >poor Cookies
 >She did say she wasn't that great a cook...
 >...But how did she burn a sandwich?
 >It was probably a happy accident. After all, peanut butter toast is magnificent
 >You wish you could trade lunches with Sleepy
 >Sleepy glances at your tray, loaded down with bananas
 >"So that's where all the bananas went"
 "Want one?"
 >The Warden frowns at you
 >"Anon, you need to eat everything on your plate. No giving any away"
 "You let me give away my dessert"
 >"That's different. No giving away healthy food"
 >The Warden is really cracking down on your eating habits today
 "But what if Sleepy really wants a few? You'd make me be a bad friend by not letting me share? Sharing is caring, you know"
 >Sleepy shrugs before The Warden can give a response
 >"It's ok Anon, bananas give me gas"
 >Damn
 >You were hoping you could unload a few bananas on Sleepy
 >Sleepy begins to dig into his meal
 >The Warden hadn't touched hers yet
 >She only had a light meal of some kind of cereal
 >Hadn't even poured milk in the bowl yet
 >She was probably still a little woozy
 >You heard all about her reaction to your knee cracking
 >hrm...
 >That gives you an idea
 >Its a long shot, and it could potentially bite you in the ass
 >You look at your tray
 >desperate times call for desperate measures
 "Hey Warden"
 >"Yes, Anon?"
 "Wanna see something neat?"
 >The Warden shows a tiny smile
 >"Only if you promise to eat after you show me"
 >That just raised the stakes
 >It was all or nothing now
 >Showtime
 "Deal"
 >Better get Sleepy away from the table too
 >Don't want any collateral damage
 >He's a nice guy too, no sense traumatizing him
 "First though, hey Sleepy, would you kindly grab me a few napkins? I forgot to grab any"
 >He tilts his head and thinks
 >He shrugs and nods, leaving the table
 >Showtime
 "Alright Warden, watch carefully..."
 >She glues her eyes to your hands as you bring them together
 >You begin to crack your fingers
 >The Warden goes pale
 >Her eyes bug out
 >She actually starts changing into a shade of green!
 >But it isn't enough... She's still sitting there...
 >Time to step it up a little
 >You roll your wrists
 >They give a nice loud crack with each complete revolution
 >The Warden's cheeks puff out as she gallops towards the bathroom
 >Quick, while she wasn't looking!
 >You dump your tray's contents into a nearby waste bin, along with your milk box
 >VICTORY
 >But what about food?
 >You couldn't just go hungry...
 >You look at Sleepy's tray
 >Can't steal from him
 >You look at The Warden's tray
 >abandoned after the snapping, poping, and cracking
 >Perfect
 >You dip a hand into the bowl and bring a handful of cereal to your mouth
 > Rice Crispies?
 >SCORE!
 >As you continue to munch, you consider what to do next
 >You'd have to find a way to make that fruit loop of a warden leave you alone
 >Maybe you could get a few lucky charms to keep her away
 >hrm...
 >That might work
 >This calls for a celebratory accent
 "oi! pip pip, cheerio, I've got it!"
 >You'll have to show her that you were a happy and well adjusted person
 >You'll need help from Cookies and Sleepy, as well as Nurse Honey Heart
 >If they all vouch for you, she'll leave you alone!
 >Hopefully
 >Sleepy finally comes back with a couple napkins tucked under a wing
 >"Here ya go Anon. Where'd The Warden go?"
 "Little fillies' room. Say, could you do me a favor?"
 >"Depends on the favor"
 "Could you put in a good word for me with the Warden? She'll just keep bothering me for as long as she thinks I'm unhappy. If you vouch for me then she'll leave me alone. She'll listen to you, surely!"
 >"It'll cost you, and don't call me Shirley"
 "I didn't....never mind, that's not important. What'll it cost me?"
 >He gives you a smirk
 >"Another pudding cup"
 >This guy wasn't nice after all
 >He's ruthlessly squeezing you for all the extra dessert he can get
 >That's probably why you like him
 >No other pony is as dry and cynical
 "Fine, but it'd better be worth it"
 >Sleepy extends a hoof and you shake it
 >"It will be, pleasure doing business with you"
 >You finish eating The Warden's meal and clean up
 >Time to find Honey Heart to get her help
 >You and Sleepy say your goodbyes and you head towards the nurses office
 >You grab a 'hard' cider on the way
 >The cider was barely alcoholic
 >So more like 'slightly firm' cider
 >You'd need something to help butter her up, and she seemed like she could use a drink
 
 
 Be Nurse Honey Heart
 >Your morning had been completely devoured by Anon's shenanigans
 >You barely ate lunch, preferring to try and get some of your backlogged work done with
 >If you never saw that hairless ape in your office again, it'd be too soon
 >*knock knock*
 >It was still only partially through lunch
 >Nopony should be around to bother you right now
 "Come in"
 >...Looks like you were right
 >No pony was here to bother you
 "Anonymous, what a surprise."
 >It really was
 >Because The Warden wasn't with him
 "Please be brief, I have a lot of work to get done"
 >Half of it was reports to various medical and scientific research groups
 >You were the only medical professional to have any contact with the alien Anon, after all
 >Meaning most of your work was directly because of the person bothering you right now
 >Anon offers you a bottle of hard cider
 >"Nurse Heart, I have a proposition for you. I'd like-"
 >You cut him off
 "I'm sorry Anon but I'm not looking for a relationship right now. I'm flattered though.  Now if you'll excuse me..."
 >Anon blinks
 >You can practically hear his brain shifting gears
 >"Wait, what? That's not what I was going to talk about"
 >You sigh in relief
 "That's good. So what are you actually here for then?"
 >"As you are well aware, there is no way The Warden will leave either of us alone as long as she thinks I'm in danger of being ill or injured"
 >You nod
 >"So I'd like you to vouch for my health, give her a big report or something"
 >You sigh
 "That would take time I just don't have."
 >Anon touches his chin and thinks
 >"What if I were to spend my free time helping you? Like a secretary or something?"
 >Celestia knows you could use the help
 >But until you could disclose more information about Anon, you'd have to keep working on new and creative ways to turn down your curious colleagues.
 >They'd never stop asking until they had real data to crunch
 "There actually is a couple ways you could help me. First, give me permission to share your record with the scientific community. Second, you will fulfill your offer to act as a secretary in your spare time"
 >Anon nods
 >"I can do that"
 >Now comes the hard part
 >It was a long shot, and it could end your career as a prison nurse...
 >Or it could make you famous and wealthy
 >So it was really a win-win situation
 "And lastly, I need a couple samples for the researchers that are flooding my inbox."
 >"What would you need?"
 "Several waste samples, saliva, hair, nails, and..."
 >Here goes nothing
 "... I'll need a blood sample"
 >No pony would ever agree to having blood drawn unless their life depended on it
 >Anon tilts his head down, hand on chin
 >"Hrm..."
 >Oh well, it was worth a shot
 >You turn back to your desk and take a sip of coffee
 >"I'll do it"
 >Your coffee spills as you choke
 >He agreed to it?!
 "You do realize I don't have any powerful anesthetic here. You'll be fully conscious the entire time"
 >Anon gives a wry smile
 >"Just don't drain me dry. Humans can pretty regularly donate a pint of blood, will that be enough?"
 "I thought you said you didn't want me to drain you dry! Really? A whole pint?!"
 >Anon chuckles
 >"Yeah, just have plenty of juice and sweets there. I'll need the sugar afterwards. As well as plenty of iron-rich food before that."
 "You sound like you've done this before"
 >Anon nods
 >"I have. I donated once before, and one of my buddies regularly donates so that he can make some extra coin"
 >You wrinkle your nose
 "Humans sell their blood?"
 >"Yup, money is a great incentive. And donated blood saves lives, so it's for a good cause"
 >That makes sense, but still
 >How can Anon be fine with a needle like that?
 "How are you comfortable with this? Getting blood drawn, I mean. Aren't you afraid of the needle?"
 >"eh, a little. But I'll be fine. The pain will be temporary and it's in the name of science, right?"
 "Science and getting The Warden to leave us alone"
 >Anon chuckles and lifts up the bottle in his hand
 >"I'd drink to that"
 >Why not?
 >Things were about to get a lot easier for you
 >one way or another...
 >You dump the rest of your coffee into a nearby sink and float your mug over for Anon to fill with cider
 >The coffee was cold anyway
 >Anon fills your mug and clinks the bottle against it
 >"To peace and quiet"
 "To peace and quiet"
 >That cider really hits the spot
 >You needed that
 
 Be Anon
 >Turns out ponies are a lot more sensitive to alcohol
 >It also turns out that Honey Heart is a talkative, friendly drunk
 >"Ya know, Anon, I didn't plan on being a nurse. Let alone a prison nurse! I wanted to be a doctor! But bills need to be paid, and it doesn't help that med school is so expensive. Doesn't matter what your cutie mark or destiny is if you can't pay for it."
 >She holds out her cup for a refill
 "Miss Heart, I think you've already had enough"
 >"What are you talking about?"
 "You're already a little drunk"
 >"Am not! I'm a professional nurse, I think I know a little more about the effects of alcohol than you do you bald monkey...thing"
 >Her expression shifts to regret
 >"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult you... You're a good guy"
 >You give her a smile
 "Thank you nurse Heart"
 >She looks at you with pure gratitude
 >"No, thank you! With those samples I'll get a position in an actual hospital, or maybe even a private practice! My name will go down in history as the physician who made it possible to study humans!"
 >She points at you
 >"There's GOLD in them thar veins!"
 >She giggles at her joke
 >You give her a smile
 >"Say, Anon, I'm sorry I lied to you earlier"
 >She did?
 "you did?"
 >She nods sadly
 >"I said I wasn't looking for a stallion... I'm tired of being alone. Most guys don't like me because I'm too independent and I work too much. I don't think I'll ever find the right stallion"
 >Poor girl is staring into her mug
 >*sniffle*
 >Oh that just isn't fair
 "You'll find Mr. Right someday, you just need someone who is laid back and doesn't mind being left alone. There are plenty of fish in the sea, and you are quite the catch yourself"
 >She looks up with teary eyes
 >"Are you saying I look like a fish?"
 >Aw hell
 "Nonono, human expression. What I meant was that there are a lot of guys out there you haven't even met yet who would be interested in you. You are lovely and smart"
 >She smiles at you
 >"Thanks Anon, that means a lot to me"
 >How did you get into this situation again?
 >"I'm not into monkeys though...sorry"
 >Oh fun, this again
 "I wasn't trying to flirt with you"
 >She giggles
 >"I was just teasing you, relax"
 >You both fall silent and you finish off the cider
 >Nurse Heart was a real lightweight
 >You look towards the stack of papers sitting in her inbox
 >Better now than never...
 "What do you say we start working?"
 >Honey Heart beams a smile at you
 >"YES! Let's get this done!"
 >You pull off the top sheet and look to see what needed to get done
 >....
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >Looks like a government facility, 'stable 51', wanted pictures of you
 >eh, that can wait... What is the second request?
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >well then
 >Time for a photo shoot
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be thrown out of the kitchen
 >For burning cereal
 >Not your fault the counter and the stove look the same!
 >You go back to the guardhouse to see your next assignment
 >You had to use your break to eat, since the cafeteria staff can't eat during lunch
 >Getting kicked out of a kitchen, not getting petted during your break, and who knows what kind of assignment you were getting for the afternoon shift
 >The spot on your ears was beginning to itch, a sharp, constant pressure against the back of your skull
 >You /really/ needed some alone time with Anon..
 >You look at a wall clock
 >Four and a half hours until dinner
 >That would last roughly forty five minutes
 >So at least five hours until you could cuddle Anon
 >ugh
 >Reaching the guardhouse, you check the duty roster
 >You were assigned early preparation duty for the arrival of the princess
 >Princess Twilight was known for being a stickler for order, perfection, and accuracy
 >And now you had to help prepare for that retentive meanie who had Anon jailed
 >You huff and head towards the Yard, where a stage was being prepared
 >Time to work, the sooner this shift ends, the sooner dinner begins
 >The sooner dinner begins, the sooner you get tummy rubs
 
 Be Sleepy
 >Be in your cell
 >Be hard at work
 >Preening is serious business
 >You've been carefully saving all the extra down feathers in a bag
 >It isn't filled much, but you'll have it filled by the end of the week
 >Anon would have his pillow
 >you gave him your word
 >And its bad business to break a promise
 >especially to a friend
 >You continue your work
 
 Be The Warden
 >Finally leaving the bathroom
 >He had explained the joint cracking during the examination earlier
 >Even though he wasn't hurting himself, it still made you sick to your stomach
 >Why would Anon make you watch him crack his fingers like that?
 >That was really mean!
 >You trot back to the mess hall
 >It still has a few inmates loitering around
 >You check the table you had been sitting at
 >Empty, no Anon or Sleepy
 >No food either, which is fine in your book
 >You weren't hungry
 >And an empty table means Anon probably ate and left
 >Good that he ate, at least
 >You shake your head to get the wooziness out
 >You couldn't follow up on Anon's dietary habits right now
 >You had to get ready for a new group of inmates coming in tomorrow
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be several hours later
 >"Thanks again for letting me send out pictures of you"
 >You and nurse Honey Heart had decimated her workload
 >Turns out most of the requests were for pictures of you
 >Heart made copies of all the pictures, enough for every request.
 >There were even a few left over
 "No problem, glad I could help"
 >The room is strewn with various papers, envelopes, and medical supplies
 >Nurse Heart's eyes sweep the room
 >"Think you could help me clean up?"
 >You nod
 "Sure thing"
 >You grab a stethoscope and a few empty sample bottles
 "Where should I put these?"
 >You open up a closet to put away the items...
 >Wait, a guitar?
 "Wait, a guitar?"
 >"Yea... I like to play in my free time.  It takes a delicate touch to be a doctor, same goes for musician. Do you play any instruments?"
 "Eh, I've tried playing a couple. Banged on drums a couple times, tried the trumpet in band, even twanged a banjo once or twice. Never really got into any of them though."
 >You both continue cleaning and organizing until the room is neat again
 >"We'll draw your blood in two days, be ready for it"
 >You nod
 "I will be"
 >Great, now you just need Cookies to vouch for you and The Warden should leave you alone
 >Hopefully
 "I'll see you around, Nurse Heart"
 >"Goodbye Anon, and thanks again"
 >You smile and nod, leaving her office
 >Time to find Cookies and enroll her in your little plan
 >Shouldn't be too hard
 >She was your girlfriend, after all
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be on your way to the nurses office
 >You need to make sure everypony is healthy
 >Can't risk such an important guest getting sick from their visit
 >You finally reach Honey's office and knock on the door
 >"Enter"
 >You do as the voice commands
 "Hi Honey Heart, I'm here to ask about the general health of the prison population to see if it is safe for the princess"
 >Honey's horn lights up and a filing cabinet opens up
 >"I was expecting somepony would inquire about that"
 >She floats a neat stack of papers over to you
 >"I prepared a report ahead of time. In summation, the prison is healthy enough for royalty"
 >That's good, one less thing for you to worry about
 >You thank her and begin to walk out
 > "Could you do me a favor on your way out?"
 "Sure, what is it?"
 >"Anon let me take pictures of him for ponies to study his physiology and I made too many copies, could you toss these out for me?"
 >She floats a stack of pictures over to you
 >From the looks of it, Anon is in several....interesting poses
 >In only his underwear
 >Unf
 "S-sure, I can take care of these for you"
 >"Thanks for getting those off my hooves."
 >She levitates them into your uniform's pocket since you already have your mouth full of report
 "Think nothing of it, it's my pleasure"
 >It really will be a pleasure to 'take care' of the photos for her
 >You say your goodbyes and head back to the staging area with the report
 >And to do some 'research' on human physiology
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be unable to find Cookies
 >You had searched all day but couldn't find her anywhere
 >Eh, she'd turn up for dinner
 >Which would be pretty soon, now that you look at a clock
 >Better head back to your room to meet her
 >You make your way back to your room, passing a napping Sleepy
 >He was asleep in the center of where two hallways intersected
 >He really could doze anywhere...
 >You'd wake him up on your way to dinner with Cookies, let him sleep until then
 >Can't pay for your favor and pillow if he isn't there to accept payment, after all
 >You make it to  your room and lie in the bed, fingers interlaced under your head
 >You stared at the ceiling, letting your mind wander as you waited
 >You almost start to doze off until you hear a light knocking at your door
 >That must be Cookies
 >You roll out of bed and open the door for her
 "Hiya Cookies"
 >She seems to already be blushing for some reason
 >"Hey Anon"
 >She's having a hard time looking you in the eyes
 "I was looking for you earlier, can we talk before dinner?"
 >She gives you a smile
 >"S-Sure..."
 >She steps into your room and you close the door and then walk over and sit on the bed
 "So, I wanted to talk about getting The Warden off my back. I've already gotten Sleepy and Honey Heart to promise to vouch for me and my health, and I think with your help The Warden will have to back off a little"
 >She tilts her head
 >"You really think she'll listen to us three enough to leave you alone?"
 >You shrug
 "I know it's a long shot, but it's better than nothing. Besides, what have I got to lose by trying?"
 >Other than a pudding cup...
 >And a pint of blood
 >But other than that, you had nothing to lose
 >"Alright, I'll tell her you've been acting nicer"
 >You smile and nod to her
 "Thanks, I owe ya one"
 >Her eyelids lower
 >Bedroom eyes have been engaged
 >"I know just how you can repay me..."
 >She slowly trots over and hops next to you on the bed
 >You reach out and begin to fondle her ears, gently rubbing and scratching
 >She lets out a sigh of relief
 >"That's perfect....right there..."
 >She begins to lean into your hand...
 >Until your belly rumbles
 >Her face contorts, twisting as she is torn between the need to care for you and her desire to cuddle
 >The need to care for you wins out, and she pulls back with a sigh
 >Her ears go flat in annoyance and resignation
 >"Come on, let's get you fed"
 >You chuckle apologetically and follow her out of your room
 >As you walk, you turn your head to face her
 "Just so you are aware, I have a deal set up with Sleepy. I'll be giving him my next few desserts. As much as I loved having you feed me pudding in bed, it is too dangerous for you to sneak me anymore.  So don't worry about me, alright?"
 >Cookies tilts her head up to look in your eyes
 >"What could be worth giving up your desserts for?"
 >You look ahead with a smile
 "That, my dear, is a secret"
 >She blushes hard at hearing you call her 'dear' and drops the subject
 >You make a minor detour to wake up Sleepy
 >You gently poke his shoulder
 "Afternoon, Sleepy. Thought you wouldn't want to miss dinner"
 >He dolefully opens his bleary eyes
 >With a yawn and a stretch he nods and falls in as the three of you continue to the mess
 >You all find your usual spots at a corner table
 >Cookies is looking a little down
 >Probably sad from not doing well in the kitchen earlier
 >Time to earn some brownie points
 "Hey Cookies, I noticed you cooked Sleepy's peanut butter sandwich earlier today"
 >"Yeah..."
 >She looks up at Sleepy
 >"Sorry about that, I haven't cooked in a while and it was an accident"
 >Sleepy shrugs
 >"No big deal, it's not worth getting worked up over"
 "Actually, could you make me one like that? I love toasted peanut butter sandwiches"
 >Cookies' expression completely shifts gears, from sadness, to confusion, to delight
 >"I'd love to make something for you Anon! I'll be right back~"
 >Cookies darts away before you can ask if she'll get in trouble for leaving you without a backup chaperone
 >Eh, she'll probably be fine
 >She's gone to the little guards' room before without trouble in the past
 >You turn to Sleepy
 >"I missed the announcements earlier because I was terribly busy committing shenanigans. Any interesting news that I missed?"
 >Sleepy nods
 >Then slowly continues to chew
 >...
 >...
 >*munch*
 >...
 >...
 "Well, what was the news?"
 >Sleepy swallows and takes a sip of milk
 >"That hits the spot..."
 "Sleepy, you aren't going to charge me for the daily announcement, are you?"
 >Sleepy turns to fully face you, offended look on his face
 >"I'm hurt that you would think I'd do that"
 >His expression goes back to its usual deadpan
 >"I was just enjoying my meal. No need to rush me. The announcements said that we would be getting new inmates"
 >You didn't really care about the new inmates
 >You barely paid attention to the ponies who were already around
 >But it is rarely worth telling the whole prison about
 "They never tell us when new inmates are coming in"
 >"Apparently these inmates are special. Last time the whole prison was told about a new inmate over the announcements, you showed up."
 >Huh, guess you were famous before you ever set foot in the prison
 >or infamous
 >whatever
 "So what makes these inmates so special?"
 >You had been the scapegoat when Twilight cut herself on your knife
 >So whoever these people were, they were here for doing something serious
 >"Dunno, announcements just warned us they would be showing up tomorrow"
 "That's not a whole lot of notice beforehand"
 >Sleepy shrugs
 >"We were only told the day before about you too"
 >Whoever they are, they were at least as dangerous or important as you were
 >Being the only member of a -comparatively- brutal society in this world, that makes you pretty special
 >What kind of creatures could warrant the same level of alert as you?
 >Sleepy seems to pick up on your musings
 >"Could be more humans"
 >Hey, that isn't a half bad guess
 >More humans would probably be treated with panic and alarm
 >Especially after you botched first contact
 >This prison already housed you pretty nicely, it would make perfect sense that more humans would be sent here
 >Maybe they were humans that got sent here by the same force that got you here?
 >That could mean they would be people you knew!
 >You might be about to see your friends again!
 >Maybe there would be a human female?
 >You really did love Cookies, and would never cheat on her...
 >...But damn, you missed looking at boobs
 >Cookies returns at that moment with a sheepish grin
 >"Sorry Anon, I think I let it burn a little..."
 >The sandwich she brought back was objectively a mess
 >The bread was blackened
 >She had attempted to cut the sandwich, but mostly just mutilated it
 >There was too much peanut butter, to the point it was dripping onto the floor
 >You gingerly pick up the sandwich, careful to not get too much peanut butter on your hands
 >you fail miserably
 >Cookies cringes as you take a bite
 >The bread was so burnt, the bite was audible around the cafeteria
 >You continue to chew, and try to thoughtfully swallow
 >Too much peanut butter
 >You choke a little
 >"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make it so..."
 "Perfect! I love the crunchiness."
 >Cookies blinks several times
 >"W-What?"
 "You want some? Sandwiches taste better when you share."
 >"I'm not sure about that, Anon...
 "I am, a wise human once said that"
 >"S-sure..."
 >You tear off a piece, coating your palms in peanut butter
 >You put the piece on Cookies' tray
 >She looks at it warily, but seeing you enjoying the rest put her doubts to rest
 >She carefully tries to get the peanut butter soaked toast into her mouth cleanly
 >And fails miserably
 >She even managed to get a bit on the tip of her nose
 >Her face twists as she struggles to chew
 >You start laughing and she is soon giggling next to you, mouth seemingly permanently glued shut by the sandwich
 >You take a sip of juice and smile
 >This sandwich was just like the ones you would make for your sister
 >Back then she would make you eat half because, as she put it, 'sandwiches taste better when you share'
 >You finish off the sandwich as well as the rest of your meal while Cookies continues to valiantly struggle against the mouthful of peanut butter
 >She even growled in annoyance at one point
 >By the time she finally finishes, you've already managed to wipe off most of the peanut butter on your hands and clean your area
 "So Cookies, you gonna 'read me a bedtime story' tonight?"
 >She cleans her muzzle and grins at you
 >She missed the peanut butter on her nose
 >"You bet"
 >You wink at her
 "See you in a little bit"
 >You turn to Sleepy
 "Good night bud, see ya around tomorrow"
 >Sleepy yawns and waves as he lazily flaps away
 >You leave the table and head towards your cell
 >Cookies will find her way there in a little bit
 
 Be Cookies
 >You love Anon
 >really /really/ love Anon
 >No matter how you managed to mess up, he never cared
 >In fact, he could make even your greatest failures into things to celebrate
 >Sure he could be blunt or even annoying at times
 >But if he can put up with you, you can sure as tartarus put up with him
 >He was a cuddle champion after all
 >He always seemed to be able to scratch itches you didn't even know you had!
 >If he ever became a masseur, you'd be his first client every day
 >And his last client every day
 >Speaking of whom, you finally arrive at his cell
 >You are carrying a book you randomly pulled from a library shelf
 >It was just a prop to avoid suspicion, didn't really matter what you had
 >You knock softly at his door
 >"Come in"
 >You enter his cell and put the book on the nightstand as Anon locks the door behind you
 >The movement makes one of the photos fall out of your jacket pocket
 >You freeze
 >Please Celestia don't let him noti-
 >Anon picks up the picture
 >"What's this?....Cookies, where did you get this?"
 >You feel your face heating intensely
 >How can you talk your way out of this?!
 >There is no legitimate excuse for having that picture!
 >Maybe telling half the truth will disarm the situation
 "Uh... Nurse Honey Heart asked me to get rid of the extras?"
 >Anon laughs
 >Nailed it?
 >Anon walks over to his desk and pulls out a pen and winks
 >"Let me just sign this for you"
 >Wow, Anon wasn't just ok with you having 'interesting' pictures of himself. He was willing to give them to you!
 >SCORE!
 >Anon finishes signing the picture and turns to you
 >"You can grab it on your way out"
 >You grin and nod, turning towards the bed
 >aw yea, cuddle time
 >you hop onto the bed and turn just in time to see Anon sprinting towards you
 >With a mighty leap, he slams down next to you on the bed, making it creak in protest
 >The maneuver also sends you flying straight up, only to land in a jumble back on the bed
 >Before you can regain any form of composure, Anon's hands are on you
 >You barely manage to muffle a squeak as he aggressively rubs your tummy
 >You can hardly get out words between gasps and giggles
 "S-Stop! Too fast! Its tickling!"
 >Anon drops his face to your belly
 "A-Anon, what are y-"
 >"THRBTRBTRBT!"
 >You shriek and your hooves wave uselessly in the air
 >Anon readjusts himself and lays down on top of you, wrapping you in a big hug
 "MRMPH!"
 >"The cuddle monster claims another victim!"
 >Anon rolls over, taking you along for the ride
 >When the world finally stops spinning, you are lying on top of him
 >He smiles broadly as he begins scratching under your cap with one hand, the other gently pinching and massaging your withers
 >You close your eyes and smile down at him
 >"Hehe, you /still/ have peanut butter on your nose! I thought you would've gotten that cleaned off by now"
 >Your eyes pop open as you try to spot the offending morsel
 >Anon chuckles and the hand on the back of your head spreads out, fingers weaving into your mane
 >"Let me get that for you..."
 >He gently pulls you down and kisses...
 >!
 >THAT WASN'T YOUR NOSE
 >THAT WASN'T YOUR NOSE AT ALL
 >A constant electricity is coursing through you
 >You feel petrified
 >Muscles locked in place
 >Heart palpitating
 >and the whole world looked slightly out of focus
 >You feel tiny against Anon's chest
 >as quickly as it started, it stops
 >Anon pulls back from his impulsive kiss
 >Your ear twitches as the immediate shock wears off
 >The electricity in your veins turns to magma
 "I...er...neh..."
 >Brain? This is body. Tell mouth to shut up
 >Body? This is brain. Roger Roger
 >Mouth? This is brain. Shhhhh, now is not the time for words.
 >The world snaps back into focus as Anon chuckles
 >"You alright Cookies?"
 "That was...woah"
 >You still feel a little tingly
 >Anon laughs
 >Leaving you breathlessly bouncing as his chest rose and fell
 
 Be Anon
 >Be the cuddle monster
 >Be on top of your prey
 "The cuddle monster claims another victim!"
 >Initiate victory roll!
 >You hold Cookies tight as you roll, pulling her with you
 >You end up on your back, Cookies' weight pressing comfortably down on your chest and stomach
 >Cookies head wobbles slightly from the sudden shift in perspective, but she quickly regains her balance
 >She closes her eyes and lets out a pleased little sound as you gently stroke and scratch her
 >You didn't notice before in all the commotion, but she somehow managed to keep that spot of peanut butter on her nose the entire time
 >"Hehe, you /still/ have peanut butter on your nose! I thought you would've gotten that cleaned off by now"
 >This gives you an idea
 >She cleaned pudding off your nose by kissing it a while back
 >Why not return the favor?
 >But why stop there? After all, you gave her a hard time earlier
 "Let me get that for you..."
 >You gently pull her down and give her a quick peck on the lips
 >She makes a little panicked sound
 >Her whole body tenses
 >You can feel her heart thundering in her chest
 >Her lips trembled against yours
 >You pull back and you notice her eyes are slightly crossed
 >"I...er...neh..."
 >...Maybe you overdid it
 "You alright Cookies?"
 >Her eyes focus on you and she turns bright pink
 >"That was...woah"
 >Oh good, she isn't broken
 >You start laughing, which sets her bouncing on your chest
 >Seeing her bobbing up and down just gets you laughing harder
 >She joins in on the laughter, which goes on for a full minute
 >As you both calm down, she stares lovingly at you
 >You can't help but smirk
 "Oops, looks like I missed the peanut butter. I'll have to try again"
 >Her blush returns and magnifies
 >She smiles coyly and leans forward, closing her eyes
 >Today is a good day
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be hungry
 >At least breakfast is only an hour away
 >One hour until you not only get to eat, but introduce everypony to their new friends!
 >You look back down at the report on your desk
 >It's a shame the princess had to postpone her visit. Jailing the new inmates caused a real fuss politically, and her expertise on friendship and compromise were needed.
 >You were still meeting royalty, though! Sure, they might not be really powerful, but they were still nobles!
 >And you would make sure they were comfortable for as long as they were your inmates
 
 Be Sleepy
 >Be in the mess
 >Eating with Cookies and Anon, as usual
 >Anon seemed in higher spirits than usual
 >"So we get to meet the mystery inmates today"
 >You nod at him
 >Cookies looks to Anon
 >"I heard they aren't ponies"
 "Huh, interesting"
 >"Why is that interesting?
 >Cookies gives Anon an incredulous look
 >"Don't tell me you didn't notice"
 >He looks confused
 >"Notice what?"
 "Anon, look around you and tell me what you see"
 >Anon shrugs and scans the mess
 >"I see a lot of tiny pastel horses eating plants"
 >Cookies nods
 >"That's exactly it. You are the only inmate who isn't a pony"
 >Anon's eyes widen at the realization
 >"Woah, I never noticed! That's neat"
 >Cookies giggles
 >"You can be so clueless sometimes"
 >Anon shoots Cookies a smirk
 >"Says the mare that had peanut butter on her nose for an hour"
 >Cookies blushes fiercely
 >She must be embarrassed about walking around like that for so long
 >"Only because you wouldn't clean it off"
 >Huh, maybe Anon carries a handkerchief that he wouldn't let her borrow?
 >That's probably it
 >That wasn't very nice of him
 >He should have shared
 
 Be Anon
 >You chuckle as Cookies giggles
 >You glance towards Sleepy who gives you a small disapproving look
 >...Maybe you shouldn't flirt in front of him
 >"You should help ponies who need it, Anon"
 >Whew, he didn't suspect anything!
 "Yea, you're right. I'm sorry Cookies"
 >Cookies laughs
 >"Just make sure it doesn't happen again"
 "I'll make no promises"
 >You shoot her a wink
 >Sleepy just shrugs and returns to his meal
 >Meanwhile, The Warden was making her way to the center of the mess
 >She stands on a table and shouts out
 >"ATTENTION, YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE!"
 >The whole mess quiets as all eyes land on her
 >"Thank you for quieting down so fast! Now then, as you all know we are getting new inmates today"
 >She beams around the mess
 >"I hope you'll all treat them well and become as good friends with them as you all are with me! I'm happy to introduce Bronze Chain and his sister, Bronze Bust!"
 >The Warden smiles from ear to ear and points towards a door, where two minotaurs are standing and claps her front hooves together excitedly
 >The male, Chain, was huge by pony standards. He was even a big guy for you. His left horn was smaller than his right and he had a coat the same color as his namesake. He wasn't wearing a shirt, but he was wearing black pants
 >The female, Bust, reminded you of some girls back on earth. Specifically, the ones that carried new and exciting forms of STDs. She had waist-length black hair and her coat was white with black splotches. She also had a much more humanlike face than her brother but still had cow ears and was wearing a tight tank-top with shorts that were ready to commit suicide
 >They walk forward towards The Warden and survey the room
 >Their eyes are quickly drawn to you
 >Being the only non-pony tends to make you stand out
 >Bust's eyes light up, and she sashays over towards your table
 >Chain narrows his eyes and follows her
 >Bust reaches your table first
 >"Howdy, good to see another minotaur lady in here. We are going to become such good friends"
 >She gives you a big grin
 >You smile back out of habit
 "I'm actually not a female minotaur. I'm a male human"
 >Her eyes widen in surprise
 >"Really? You look just like a minotaur!"
 >You nod and lift up a foot and remove the shoe
 >Her eyes are gigantic as she watches you wiggle your toes in your socks
 >"Woah! So you really aren't a minotaur! I've never heard of anything like a 'human' before... But I'm guessing we're still going to be /good/friends. We will catch on fantastically"
 >Her whole demeanor shifts and she leans forward, crossing her arms to exaggerate her already impressive assets.
 >She winked at you when she said 'good'
 >You glance over at Cookies, who has a fake smile plastered rather poorly on her face
 >Chain catches up with his sister and looks at you with a glare
 >"You stay the tartarus away from my sister"
 >Bust pouts at her brother
 >"Aw come on Chain, please let me keep this one? You know I have a thing for androgynous guys!"
 >Hey
 >rude
 "I'll have you know I'm appropriately masculine for a human, thank you very much"
 >Bust giggles and her brother gives you a scowl
 >Chain leans forward and looks you dead in the eye
 >"You wanna know why I'm here? I made that fluffer Blueblood cry"
 >Every pony in earshot gasps at the cruel language
 >How adorable
 "Neat"
 >Bust nibbles her fingertip
 >"And I'm in here for being too cute"
 >You doubt that
 >Chain turns to his sister and corrects her with a grin
 >"Actually, you're here because you couldn't stop laughing at Blueblood after he started crying. It didn't help that you told him to, and I quote, 'build a bridge and get over it'"
 >Bust huffs and pulls her shirt a little further down, exposing slightly more cleavage
 >"I wouldn't have laughed if you hadn't made him cry in the first place"
 >Chain frowns at her
 >"Well I wouldn't have made him cry if you hadn't been trying to get him to nuzzle your-"
 >The Warden walks right in between the quarreling siblings, oblivious to the argument she was interrupting
 >"I'm glad to see you two have already made friends with Anon!"
 >Chain faces you
 >"I'll make him friends with the floor if he gets too close to Bust"
 >The Warden laughs
 >"Silly Chain, you can't be friends with the floor! Now come on, you two are probably hungry after your long journey here"
 >They both start leaving with The Warden, but Bust stops for a moment and turns towards you again with her hands behind her back to exaggerate her chestfruit
 >"I'll catch you later, manling"
 >She winks at you and hurries to catch up with The Warden, hips moving just a bit more than necessary
 >You turn back to the table to see Sleepy still calmly eating as though nothing had happened
 >Cookies' jaw was clenched as she watched Bronze Bust move away
 >"I don't like her"
 >You chuckle
 >Well, this prison just got a little more interesting
 >Sleepy clears his throat
 >"I didn't expect them to be nobles"
 >Wait, what?
 "Those two are nobles?"
 >Sleepy nods
 >"Not very high up though. You can tell by their names. The hierarchy goes: Platinum, Gold, Silver, Bronze. Minotaurs in the military usually take the surname 'steel' and commoners usually have surnames like 'iron', 'copper', or 'pewter'. They are probably half-breeds too. Minotaur names are usually concepts like 'will' or 'courage'. Being named after objects is rare among minotaurs but common with ponies and cows"
 >neat
 >wait a minute...
 "You know an awful lot about minotaur society"
 >Sleepy shrugs
 >"Have to. Minotaurs go through a lot of pillows. Horns on the sides of their heads, you know how it goes"
 >That makes sense
 >Hopefully you won't be seeing too much of those two
 
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >The Warden is attempting to talk your ear off
 >The only reason she's failing is because you are too busy being angry at this 'Anon' fellow
 >Who the hay does he think he is, ogling your sister like that?!
 >If The Warden hadn't saved his butt, you would have ground him into the dirt
 >You'll find a chance to show him that you are the new top dog around here
 >He'll never know what hit him
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >You like this human 'Anon'
 >He was cute
 >And funny
 >And so brave! Anon was able to stand his ground against your brother!
 >Most males would cower in fear of your brother
 >Some would cry if your brother looked at them funny
 >Anon smirked when he heard your brother insult Blueblood
 >he /smirked/
 >This male was a breed all his own
 >Soon to be all /your/ own
 >Whether he was single or not, you didn't know
 >And didn't care
 >either way, that male would soon be resting his head on your-
 >"...So how about it, Bust? You want to join?"
 >Oh buck, The Warden just asked you a question
 "uh....sure?"
 >"Lovely! I just know you'll love book club!"
 
 Be Anon
 >Be after breakfast
 >Be on your way to your cell block with Sleepy
 "So how's that pillow coming along?"
 >Sleepy smiles
 >"Everything is going according to schedule. Your pillow will be ready in another couple days. earliest possible would be late tomorrow, latest would be in three days"
 "Awesome, thanks!"
 >Sleepy smirks at you
 >"Just keep the pudding flowing during meals"
 >He just had to rub it in, didn't he?
 "Sure thing, you tiny greedy horse"
 >You both chuckle and turn the corner to find Bronze Chain leaning against a wall, arms crossed
 >You give a little two finger salute and Sleepy nods at him as you both try to pass
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4R3wH99V-gs&list=PL53287B284F875BDE&index=7
 >"Not so fast there"
 >Chain moves in front of you
 >"You didn't think I'd let you get away with staring at my sister like that, did you?"
 >He gives you a cruel smile
 >Well shit
 >This guy is easily twice your weight in pure muscle
 >If you have to fight him, it won't be pretty
 "Sleepy... You might want to go on without me"
 >This is no place for tired pacifist horses
 >Sleepy looks up at you, concerned expression on his face
 >"You sure you'll be ok?"
 >You nod
 "I'll manage. Go"
 >Sleepy cautiously steps around Chain and hurries away
 >Leaving you alone with this big bunch of bovine biomass
 >Your only hope, if it comes down to a fight, is to move fast and get under his guard. Use his height and mass to your advantage to try and outmaneuver him.
 >You'd have to bite, scratch, and go for the family jewels
 >No place for honor in a prison fight
 >You brace yourself for the worst as Chain uncrosses his arms and points at you
 >"Your momma so fat, she's on BOTH sides of the family"
 >...
 >Wait, what?
 >"Your momma so fat, she needs two watches. One for each time zone she's in"
 >Chain grins at you
 >"Had enough yet, punk?"
 >...He's not going to attack?
 >He's just going to insult your mother?
 >AW HELL NAW
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7RWhf2FtXU&list=PL53287B284F875BDE&index=5
 >HE IS GOING DOWN!
 "YOUR momma so fat, she needs her own Alicorn to get up in the morning"
 >Chain's jaw drops
 >His eyes widen
 >Looks like no one has ever fought back
 >Meaning you were the first
 >Neat
 >His mouth opens and closes a couple times, gasping like a fish
 >Time to milk this while that overgrown cow is stunned
 "Your momma so fat, when she stepped on a scale the doctor said 'well I'll be, that's my phone number!'. Your momma so fat, her blood type is butter!"
 >With each insult, he takes a step back
 >Looks like he can dish it out, but doesn't know how to take it
 >He has a 'glass mother', so to speak
 >You haven't had this much fun in a long time
 "Your momma so fat, that when she bent over, the Grand Canyon said 'DAMN!'"
 >"W-Why you little..."
 >He can't even come up with a retort!
 >FINISH HIM!
  "Your momma SO FAT that if you slapped her ass you could ride the ripples with a surfboard!"
 >FATALITY
 >His hands clench into fists
 >"This isn't over...DWEEB!"
 >And with that, the minotaur makes a hasty retreat
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBXoC-l0SHU
 >FLAWLESS VICTORY
 >You chuckle and start walking towards you cell again
 >"THAT WAS AMAZING!"
 >A very feminine voice calls out from behind you
 >You turn to see Bust walking out from behind the bend in a nearby hall
 >"I saw the whole thing!"
 >She runs up to you, awed grin on her face
 >"No one has ever stood up to my brother like that before! You sure are one tough guy~"
 >She slows the last few feet and gets uncomfortably close
 >You try to create some distance, but every time you do she just takes another step
 >Out of the frying pan and into the fire, it would appear
 >your back presses against a wall
 >"You know, I have a thing for strong men... What do you say we find a nice spot for me to sit on your lap?"
 >This is rapidly getting out of hand
 "Eh... I don't-"
 >She gives a predatory smile and giggles, placing a hand on your chest
 >"So... your cell, or mine?"
 >She winks
 >You need an adult
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >Shit, you ARE an adult!
 >You need an adult who can properly adult!
 >Another voice calls out from the side
 >"Why hello there inmates Anon and Bust"
 >OH THANK GOD
 >The cavalry has arrived!
 >Cookies approaches from the same bend that Bust had been hiding behind
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be walking down the halls
 >You saw how those minotaurs looked at him
 >One looked like it wanted to eat him, and the other looked like it wanted to /eat/ him
 >You decided to follow a little ways behind Anon
 >You had librarian duty, and Anon was walking in the general direction of the library
 >The library you had to go to anyway
 >Perfect excuse to protect your coltfriend
 >"Eh... I don't-"
 >That was Anon's voice!
 >You must have caught up with him!
 >You rush around the bend to the sounds of feminine giggles
 >Anon did not sound like that
 >It'd better not be that-
 >It was
 >"So... your cell, or mine?"
 >AW TARTARUS NAW
 >Bust was WAY too close to Anon
 >You weren't gonna let this cow near /your/ man!
 >And Anon was obviously not pleased with the situation
 >Time to play interference
 "Why hello there inmates Anon and Bust"
 >You trot up and force yourself in between the two
 "I bumped into The Warden a few minutes ago, she's looking for you Bust. She said you promised to join book club. She sounded excited, today they are talking about the most grueling choice the main character has to make... Tipping the florist's cashier three bits or four"
 >Bust huffs and crosses her arms
 >"But I don't wanna!"
 >She bounced a little to emphasize her point
 >You glance at Anon and catch him giving a look at her chest
 > then he looks back to you with a thankful, sheepish smile
 >...You'd have to talk to him about that later
 "Come with me, Bust."
 >"But I-"
 "Since you are new I'm going to personally show you where the book club meets in the library"
 >You begin trotting away and Bust eventually follows, sulking the entire time
 >You throw one last look back at Anon and see him mouthing 'thank you'
 >You nod back at him and smile, turning your head back towards the library
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >Be in your cell
 >Be pacing back and forth
 >Be furious
 >No one has ever stood their ground against you before
 >To have such a scrawny creature not only weather your assault, but fight back?
 >insanity!
 >Anon hasn't won yet though
 >That /thing/ caught you off guard last time, that's all
 >You're new here, and that threw you off your game
 >Next time you won't be beaten so easily
 >There is no way that little brat could go another round against you!
 >You nod to yourself and leave your cell
 >You were going to find the gym
 >Then you were going to work off some of this anger
 >You wander through the halls, glaring at anypony that doesn't move out of your way fast enough
 >You notice a pony that is slightly larger than the others, wearing a green sweater over his yellow coat
 >Must be a weightlifter
 >Perfect, he would know where the gymnasium is
 "You there, where can I perfect the monument to beauty that is my body?"
 >The stallion jumps in surprise as you quickly move to corner him
 >"W-W-What?"
 >How dare he not tell you where you could lift heavy things!
 "If you won't tell me where the gym is, maybe I should just lift you instead!"
 >The stallion smiles nervously
 >"You're looking for the gym? Why didn't you say so? It's down this hall, then take the next two lefts you can. Can't miss it"
 >The stallion is practically trembling
 >This pleased you
 >This one, at least, knew its place
 >You grunt at the pony and turn to follow his directions
 >"H-Have a nice day neighborino"
 >You stop
 >and turn back towards him
 >He audibly gulps
 "What did you just call me?"
 >The stallion can barely stand at this point
 >"I d-didn't mean any harm by it, f-friendo"
 >Your eyes narrow
 "Listen to me very carefully"
 >He nods
 >"Okily Dokily"
 >You decide to ignore that one
 >You get the feeling you'll be here all day otherwise
 "I"
 "AM"
 "NOT"
 "YOUR"
 "'FRIENDO'"
 >"eep!"
 >The stallion covers his face with his forelegs and trembles
 >You smile in satisfaction and look westwards, where the promised land lies
 >You resume your Journey to the West
 >The stallions 'friendos' rush over to see if he is alright
 >The stallion, finally free from your crushing gaze, begins bawling
 [spoiler] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wu13lImbF68[/spoiler]
 >Another weight pony rushes up to you after watching the whole interaction
 >He had aTan coat with blue hair
 >Little creature was probably too scared to act until now
 >And now he's standing in your path
 >He should have kept his head down
 >"Why did you do that?!"
 >You raise an eyebrow at him
 >Then smile
 "Because I could"
 >The stallion glances at his crying friend
 >"You shouldn't be such a bully!"
 >You lean down towards him
 "I'm afraid I can't do that"
 >His ears go flat against his skull and he backs away a few steps
 >"W-Why is that?"
 >You take a deep breath and roar
 "BECAUSE I'M HALF BULL!"
 >The sudden increase in volume makes every pony in the hall jump
 >The stallion in front of you cowers in fear
 >Whimpers
 >Then darts away towards his friends
 >This is how it should be
 >With you at the top of the totem pole!
 >All this terrorizing has gotten you pumped up
 >Perfect mood for lifting
 >Your tail swishes as you stalk your way down the hall towards the gym
 >You feel good again
 >And you haven't even picked up anything heavy yet!
 >Maybe you'll give Anon a 'friendly' visit afterwards
 >Show that monkey what you're really made of
 >You grumble under your breath
 "Just you wait, Anon... I'm coming for you soon!"
 
 
 Be Anon
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFDKmDEnEsM
 >Be in the middle of a sneeze
 "WASTCHU!"
 >"Excuse you"
 >You sniffle
 "Thanks Sleepy"
 >After your escapades with the Bronze siblings, you had managed to catch up with him near the arcade
 >You smile at him
 "Did you know that in some human cultures, sneezing is considered a sign someone somewhere is talking about you?"
 >Sleepy gives you a blank look
 >"Humans are odd"
 >You chuckle
 "Can't argue with you there"
 >Sleepy smiles, then shakes his head
 >"I still can't believe you took that monster on by yourself"
 >You grin at him
 >Time to milk this for all its worth
 "You saw how he was trying to scare me in the mess. I couldn't bring him down a peg there because Cookies could have been caught in the crossfire. I knew Chain was waiting in the hall, getting caught was part of my plan"
 >No it wasn't
 >But it sounded cool
 >Sleepy gives a low whistle
 >"Impressive"
 >You do a little bow
 "It can be hard being so awesome, but someone has to do it. Just call me Mr. Amazing"
 >Sleepy snorts
 >hey
 >rude
 "Hey, at least I could stand up to him. You ran away"
 >Sleepy smirks
 >"Because you told me to. I could have put that  minotaur in his place"
 >Your turn to snort
 "What, would you have conned him out of pudding until he begged for mercy?"
 >Sleepy chuckles
 >"nah, I only con people I like"
 >aw...
 >Sleepy glances over at the arcade
 >"Wanna play a few rounds?"
 >It feels like forever since you've played a decent game with a friend
 >Ponies really like rhythm and racing games, with the odd simulation game thrown in
 >Pretty dull when you play alone, but maybe Sleepy can energize the experience
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcY7m6AuqJA
 "Sure, let's do it"
 >You both head into the arcade and the prize-desk pony waves at you both
 >The light here is much dimmer than the rest of the prison
 >Perfect for preventing glare on the cabinet screens
 >You and Sleepy play a few rhythm games
 >Most of the songs are stupidly easy
 >At least you earn a bunch of prize tickets
 >Your seven year old self would drool at the sight of such a pile of tickets
 >After a few tracks, Sleepy switches to a dating sim while you watch and give your opinion on the in-game characters
 >Sleepy spends most of his time in-game training his character and ends up hooking up with a unicorn. Classic tsundere type
 "Say Sleepy, is there anything with a little more...action? More oomph"
 >Sleepy nods and gestures for you to follow
 >You pass an air hockey table and a bongo-drum game as Sleepy leads you to a pair of booths
 >Sleepy plops down in the first booth and motions for you to take the second
 >They look just like the two player Vs. racing cabinets back home
 >With one major difference
 "Uh... how am I supposed to drive this?"
 >There is no steering wheel or pedals
 >Just one stick to the side of the chair with a button on top, and a dense fiber loop
 >"You've never used reins before?"
 "Nope. My people use wheels to turn our vehicles, and pedals to speed up or slow down"
 >Sleepy rolls his eyes
 >"Snap the reins to go forward, pull them back to slow down. Pull them in a direction to turn. That lever is your hoof brake and the button is your special ability.  You'll catch on in no time"
 >You shrug and take your seat in the booth
 >You awkwardly navigate the menus as Sleepy waits
 >"Take your time. Not like racing games are about speed or anything"
 "My people have a saying: Slow and steady wins the race"
 >In your defense, reins are hard to use
 >Doesn't help that the graphics are piss-poor
 >"If that's really the case, there is no chance you'll lose"
 >Sleepy smirks at you
 >"How about we make this interesting. If you win, I'll consider your pudding debts paid meaning your pillow will be completely paid off. If I win, you need to pay me another pudding cup"
 >That could be a good deal
 >Could be a terrible mistake
 >Screw it
 "Oh it's on now, I'm paying off my pillow right now!"
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHJgXmnHyZw
 >You finally manage to select a racer to pull your 'cart' and both booths go black as they load up the track
 >The camera pans around a technicolor pathway while the track's name floats on screen
 >>"Multicolor Boulevard"
 >You and Sleepy give each other determined glances
 >The camera stops panning when it comes across a carriage being pulled by a polygon pony
 >The game begins the countdown to start the race
 >"3"
 >Your grip tightens on the reins
 >"2"
 >You swallow
 >"1"
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SdGzahsDY1U
 >You and Sleepy crack your reins at the same time
 >Both your racers speed forward, matched neck and neck
 >You stay tied for first place for several seconds
 >your virtual carts grinding and trading splinters
 >...But Sleepy quickly takes a small lead
 >Lucky bastard was spawned on the inside track for the first turn
 >No matter, still plenty of race to be run
 >Sleepy takes a risk and rams your cart, hoping to make you lose control
 >His ploy nearly pays off
 >You barely manage to retain control and snap the reins again
 >While you didn't crash, you did lose a few feet on him
 >He has nearly a full carriage lead on you now
 >"Where is your awesomeness now 'Mr. Amazing'?"
 >You take a breath
 >There is still plenty of race, you got this
 >You aren't even at the second turn yet...
 >You glance at the minimap
 >Shit!
 >Snake turn!
 >You always had a hard time with those
 >And that was when you were familiar with the controls
 >You grit your teeth as the turn comes up
 >Sleepy begins to make the first turn, then immediately cracking his reins the opposite direction to his turn as a wing flicks his hoof brake
 >You watch in awe as he power slides right through both curves, carriage never leaving the road
 >You didn't know carriages could drift!
 >You know you can't pull of the same maneuver, and attempt a more standard response
 >It doesn't work out very well, your carriage ends up on the grass next to the road most of the turns
 >The slip-up kills your momentum
 >Sleepy gains a sizeable lead as you flounder in the turn
 >"Give up yet? There is no way you can win!"
 "I'll never surrender! This aint over 'til the fat lady sings!"
 >Somewhere far away, Bronze Chain's mom sneezes
 >You gun it, repeatedly snapping the reins viciously in an attempt to rebuild velocity
 >There is still plenty of race, no need to panic
 >You manage to not fall further behind, until Sleepy starts using his racer's special ability
 >He starts dropping banana peels
 >The first one comes as a surprise, and you go spinning
 >Losing even more precious distance and speed
 >You /really/ hate bananas
 >You quickly learn to use your own special to counter his
 >Your racer can jump
 >He has a massive lead at this point
 >You feel a single sweat droplet roll down the side of your face
 >This isn't good
 >Your racer speeds up a mountain path with low guardrails, only to be confronted with a banana peel at the top
 >right in front of a tight turn
 >That rat bastard!
 >Out of raw gamer instinct, you smash the special button
 >your carriage sails high above the fruit skin
 >And right over the guard rail as well
 >You watch in awe as your carriage flies through the air like a comet
 >Helios himself would be proud
 >Well shit, game over....
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5xdue7GFcc
 >Wait...
 >no way!
 >Lady luck smiles upon you today!
 >Your carriage is flying straight towards another section of racetrack...
 >...A section of racetrack that is far ahead of Sleepy
 >Sleepy had barely been paying attention to the race after the first few seconds, after he gained the lead
 >Why would he pay attention? You barely knew the controls and he was far ahead of you
 >At least, he was
 >His eyes bug out a bit as his screen flashes
 >>'You are now in Second Place!'
 >His eyes dart to the minimap
 >"INCONCEIVABLE!"
 >You smirk
 "I don't think that word means what you think it means"
 >Sleepy sharply turns his head to face you
 >" When did you pass me?"
 >He attempts to power drift through another snake turn and fails
 >His confusion is messing up his driving
 >You can work with this
 "I thought you saw the message about becoming second place"
 >Sleepy flaps his wings a few times in aggravation
 >" HOW did you pass me?!"
 "I'll tell you how! I'M BATMAN"
 >He glues his eyes back to his screen as his wheels run on grass
 >For the first time since the start of the race
 >His eyes narrow on the screen
 >"I know what you're trying to do, you're trying to confuse me. Play mind games. It won't work!"
 >Looks like he saw through your plan
 >And now it looks like he's getting serious
 >While that stunt gave you a massive lead, it also left you without any momentum to speak of
 >You crack the reins hard
 >You may have the lead now, but he could still catch up
 >There is still plenty of race, after all
 >You manage to rebuild your speed, but at a cost
 >Sleepy is right behind you
 >You can see the finish line
 >You are both working overtime on the reins
 >Sleepy manages to gain a few more feet during the last turn
 >This is it!
 >The finish line is only a few more feet!
 >"Hiya Anon!"
 >Your vision is suddenly obstructed by Bust's bust!
 >You jump in surprise, accidently slamming the special button
 >"Book club ended a little while ago. I've been looking for you everywhere!"
 "Can'tTalkRightNowPleaseMOVE!"
 >you lean around her and desperately scan the screen
 >Did you win?...
 >...huh
 >oops?
 >The booth's screen is frozen, your carriage sitting perfectly on top of Sleepy's
 >Looks like the game couldn't handle a tie
 >You slouch back in your seat as Bust giggles, still standing in front of the screen
 "So Sleepy...no change in my debt?"
 >"Agreed"
 >You glance over at sleepy and smirk
 "Dang, that was a close one. If Bust hadn't distracted me, I would have won"
 >Sleepy shakes his head and laughs
 >"In your dreams"
 >You join the laughter
 >After a few seconds, you turn to Bust
 >Who is standing awfully close in the tiny space of the booth
 >Giving you bedroom eyes
 >You take a breath and mentally prepare yourself
 >She caught you off guard last time
 >Not this time
 >This time you wouldn't need saving
 "So...Why were you looking for me?"
 >Bust smiles and plays with her hair
 >"I have a fever..."
 >You raise an eyebrow
 "So why seek me out for that? Shouldn't you go to the nurse?"
 >She shakes her head
 >"Like I said, I have a fever... and the only prescription is more manling"
 >With that, she takes a step forward and half turns
 >And then settles herself roughly on your lap
 >So, this is happening now
 >Sleepy's eyes go wide
 >She wraps her arms around your neck and smiles seductively
 >"...I'm ready for my medicine, doctor~"
 >YOU NEED AN ADULT
 "W-Where's Cookies? I thought she was with you?!"
 >Smooth
 >Bust gives you a confused look
 >"Do you mean the guard from earlier? She had to stay /behind/ at the library"
 >She wriggled a little when she said 'behind'
 >It felt quite good, and you were not okay with that
 >"Did you know they have paintings of you in the library? They are good, but I prefer the real thing"
 >Bust giggles and wriggles again
 >This is NOT going as you hoped
 >...alright, it isn't going as /most/ of you hoped
 >That other part of you was a real dick
 "Please get up, I have a girlfriend"
 >She tilts her head
 >"Oh? Who is she?"
 >You can't tell her the truth. That would just cause all sorts of problems
 "She isn't in jail"
 >Bust's seductive grin morphs into a mischievous smirk
 >"I don't mind, and she'll never know~..."
 >NOT GOOD
 "Please get off my lap?..."
 >She giggles
 >"Not until you are mine"
 >This girl just doesn't take 'no' for an answer
 >You've got to think of a way to escape
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >...It is hard to think with her curled up on you like this
 >You look at your pile of tickets
 >Time to make a sacrifice for the greater good
 >Your inner child cries
 "If I promised to get you something with my prize tickets, would you get off my lap?"
 >She giggles and wriggles again
 >"Fine, but don't go too far..."
 >She moves her face close to yours
 >"I want my seat to still be warm the next time I need to rest my hooves"
 >With that she rocks herself off of you, freeing you
 >Sleepy manages to pick his jaw off the floor and follows you and Bust to the prize counter
 >Every job that didn't require a specialist was filled by the guards
 >the Prize counter was no exception, and the guard smiled as you approached
 >Because the booths face away from the counter, he must not have seen Bust sitting on your lap
 >Good, the less who knew about that the better
 >You hand over the pile of tickets and a little part of you dies inside
 >The guard runs your tickets through a counting machine
 >"You have an impressive six hundred and forty two tickets"
 >Bust elbows your side
 >"Not the only thing Anon has that's impressive~"
 >You sigh as the guard turns bright pink
 "Just tell me what I can get with those"
 >The guard silently nods and points towards the back shelf
 >Looks like you can afford anything from the top shelf
 >"Oooh, ooh, I want that one!"
 >Bust is pointing towards a stuffed gorilla
 >"monkeys are my favorite animal"
 "...of course they are"
 >The guard retrieves the toy and hands it over
 >"S-Sir, you still have twenty three tickets left over. You can get anything in the display here"
 >There is nothing worthwhile in the display, just a few pathetic pieces of plastic that had long ago given up their dreams of becoming toys
 "Hey Sleepy, you can have the rest of my tickets...on one condition"
 >Sleepy looks at you
 "Never talk about what happened here today"
 >Sleepy nods
 >Bust cheers as she picks up the gorilla and squeezes
 >"It's SO FLUFFY! I think I'll name it after you. Thank you for Fluffanon, Anon!"
 >well, at least she wasn't trying to tempt you now
 >Time to make your escape now that you can think clearly
 >You glance at a clock on display
 "Excuse me sir, is that clock accurate?"
 >He nods
 >"It is enchanted to always be accurate"
 >magic sure is neat
 "If that's the case, then I'm late for..."
 >Think man, THINK!
 "...My midday nap"
 >NAILED IT
 >Sleepy looks at the clock in shock
 >"Me too!"
 >Is he serious?
 >He actually schedules those?
 >Whatever, now to execute the esc-
 >"Can me and Fluffanon come with you? I promise we are both soft~"
 >Well shit, that plan backfired
 >Time for plan B
 >...which is?
 >Bust starts moving closer to you again
 >ITS NOW OR NEVER!
 "I GOTTA USE THE LITTLE ANON'S ROOM"
 >(NAILED IT)^2
 >You rush out of the room, leaving a baffled guard and a sleepy Sleepy behind.
 >Along with your overly zealous suitor
 >You manage to make it back to your cell without incident and lock the door behind yourself
 >There was no way Bust knew which dorm was yours, so you were safe
 >At least for a little while
 
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >Be happy
 >You spent time with Anon and he got you a present!
 >Sure, he pretended he didn't like you
 >Sure, you kind of coerced him into giving you that gift
 >but you knew the truth
 >He could barely keep his eyes off you
 >He's just playing hard to get
 >He's the first one to do that
 >Usually, males only need one look before they are putty in your hands.
 >Anon is different in another way too
 >He gives you a thrill like none before...
 >He's worth chasing
 >you squeeze fluffanon and wander back towards your cell
 >A nap isn't a bad idea
 >Beauty sleep is important
 >You can let Anon play his little games for now
 >You'd have that manling eventually
 >As you wander the halls, you realize you are lost
 >It's still only your first day here, after all
 >You awkwardly stand in an intersection, holding fluffanon close
 >"Hiya Bronze Bust! How is your first day coming along?"
 >It's The Warden
 "So far it's going well"
 >You smile and hold up fluffanon
 "Anon won me this at the arcade!"
 >The Warden returns your grin
 >"I'm so glad that you've already made a friend! Anon is usually keeps to himself so much, its good to see him making another friend too. I knew he'd like you the moment he saw you!"
 >You blush a little
 >Weird
 >You haven't blushed in a very long time
 "Oh yea, Anon is pretty great..."
 >The Warden squints at you
 >Then her eyes go wide
 >"You don't....have a crush on him... do you?"
 >You smile and give a quick nod
 >The Warden squees and prances in place
 >"How exciting!"
 >You giggle
 "He's really unique, like no other guy out there"
 >The Warden nods in approval
 >Hrm... maybe you can play this to your advantage?
 >You change your expression to one of sadness
 "... but I don't think he likes me as much as I like him"
 >The Warden frowns
 >Her brow furrows and she chews a lip
 >Suddenly, her expression jumps back to joy
 >"I've got it! I'll help you out!"
 >Look at that, you just got an ally
 >A very powerful ally
 >Anon would be yours in no time with her help!
 "I can't thank you enough! This means so much to me! You are the best"
 >The Warden is practically bouncing now
 >"I'm happy to help! I've ALWAYS wanted to play matchmaker! Me, helping other ponies find true love..."
 >The Warden hums happily to herself
 >"Is there anything else I can help you with?"
 >You look around
 "I'm actually a little lost... could you help me find my cell?"
 >The Warden nods and grins
 >"Sure thing, once we're there we can talk about ways to get Anon to notice you!"
 >You were planning on a nap, but this works too
 >This works quite well indeed
 
 
 
 Be Sleepy
 >Be exhausted
 >Today had been a real emotional roller-coaster
 >You had been hungry, proud, worried, scared, happy, dumbstruck, and tired
 >And it wasn't even lunch yet!
 >All these shenanigans had really tuckered you out
 >You still couldn't believe how that minotaur sat on Anon's lap
 >She really did look....
 >...well cushioned
 >Anon is one lucky guy
 >Even if her brother is scary
 >You hurry back towards your cell
 >You were /really/ late for your nap
 >You will need the alarm clock to wake you in time for lunch
 >You will also need to move your afternoon nap sooner
 >And have it last longer
 >Meaning you had a wonderful afternoon nap to look forward to
 >Only thing missing was somepony to share it with
 >...
 >Dating sims always make you feel a little lonely when you finish
 >Not your fault mares wanted to constantly do things together other than nap
 >You just needed to find a mare who could handle time away from you
 >Maybe Anon knew somepony?
 >...Probably not
 >Oh well
 >You finally arrive at your cell and hop onto your bed
 >You don't even bother with the blanket, you just curl up on top of the covers
 >You quickly drift off to sleep, thoughts of the arcade running through your mind
 >Overall, it had been a great morning
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be in the library still
 >You were stationed here until lunch
 >The book club had ended a while ago
 >It was almost lunch time, actually
 >This shift had been miserable
 >You usually really enjoy librarian duty
 >It was indoors and you could sit and read for the entire shift
 >But not this time
 >This time you were too anxious
 >Because that cow could be trying to solicit cuddles from a defenseless Anon!
 >That was your job!
 >Your jaw clenches and your ears reflexively press on the back of your head
 >You couldn't relax enough to read, and you were too on edge to sit still
 >You shake your head and bite your lip
 >You should trust Anon more
 >He would never betray you
 >And it wasn't like that minotaur would just plop herself on top of him
 >at least, not in public
 >...probably
 >This was torture
 >The situation could not possibly get any worse
 >"Hiya Cookies, are you enjoying librarian duty?"
 >Oh, The Warden is here now
 "It's just peachy, Ma'am"
 >She trots closer to your desk
 >"You don't seem all that happy. What's wrong?"
 >There is no way you can tell the truth
 >But maybe a half-truth will get The Warden off your back?
 "I'm worried about the new inmates"
 >The Warden tilts her head
 >"Why? I think they are going to fit in fine. It also looks like Bust and Anon are becoming fast friends!"
 >The Warden looks around conspiratorially
 >"Did you know? Bust has a crush on Anon! I think the feeling might be mutual... He gave her a present!"
 >The Warden giggles
 >Your expression deadpans
 "You don't say"
 >"I do! I promised to help her too. Since you probably know the most about Anon, can you help me help Bust?"
 >AW TARTARUS NAW
 >Your boss did NOT just ask you to help her help some cow to steal your Anon
 "I'm afraid I can't think of any way to help, Ma'am"
 >The Warden frowns
 >"Oh well... if you think of anything, let me know right away!"
 >You shrug noncommittally
 >The Warden smiles
 >"It is almost lunch, go ahead and make sure Anon is ready to eat. I'll close up here for you"
 >at last!
 >You could finally go check on Anon!
 >That cow better not have touched him
 >If you found /one/ hair out of place...
 "Thank you ma'am"
 >You rush out of the library towards Anon's cell
 
 Be Anon
 >Be napping comfortably in your bed
 >Be dreaming of Cookies
 >You are running from a pair of minotaurs
 >Dressed in banana suits
 >Freaky
 >A knock at your door wakes you up
 >"Anon, you there?"
 >Its Cookies
 >Must be time for lunch
 "Yep, gimme a minute"
 >You yawn and stretch
 >You get out of bed and open the door
 >You rub the sleep out of your eyes and smile at her
 "Time for lunch already?"
 >Cookies nods and she bites her lip
 >Her ears are plastered flat against her head
 >"Did that cow try anything funny while I wasn't around?"
 >You sigh and nod
 "She cornered me in the arcade"
 >Cookies fidgets
 >"The Warden said you gave her a present..."
 >Cookies looks up at you with eyes the size of saucers
 >"Anon, do you not like me anymore?"
 >You blink in confusion
 "What? Why would you ask that?"
 >Cookies stamps a hoof
 >"The Warden said you gave that cow a present!"
 >Damn, word travels fast
 >You give Cookies a reassuring smile
 "Like I said, Bust cornered me. I used it as a bribe to get her away from me. You are the only girl for me. I'd never cheat on you"
 >Cookies sighs in relief
 >"I trust you Anon"
 >She smiles and turns
 >"Lets get you fed"
 >You nod and follow her out the door to the mess
 >Looks like she picked you up a little early today
 >The mess is practically empty, most ponies still on their way
 >You both go through the food line quickly and find your usual spots
 >"Anon, there is something I need to warn you about"
 >You look up from your carrot
 >Cookies looks worried again
 "What is it? What's bothering you?"
 >Cookies stares at her plate
 >"The Warden said she was going to help that cow win you over"
 "Really?"
 >Cookies nods
 >"She even tried to get me to help"
 >You give Cookies a reassuring smile
 "Don't worry. The Warden is as incompetent as they come. There is no way they can steal me away. I said I love you and I meant it"
 >Cookies finally looks up and smiles back
 >"Thanks Anon, that really means a lot"
 >Sleepy arrives and sits down
 >He looks significantly more tired than usual
 "You alright Sleepy? You look terrible"
 >Sleepy lazily looks up at you and smiles
 >"I'm alright, just didn't sleep enough. We need to hang out more, it was fun. Well, it was fun up until Bust showed up"
 >You give Sleepy a look
 >The kind of look that says 'in the name of all that is good and right, don't say anything else'
 >"That Bronze Bust sure is brash. Is she nearly as soft as she looks?"
 >Cookies gives you a confused look
 >"Why would Anon know how soft that cow is?"
 >Sleepy turns to her
 >"While Anon and I were playing in the arcade, she appeared out of nowhere and then sat on Anon's lap"
 >Cookies expression deadpans
 >She turns to face you again
 >"I see. Is that true?"
 >You  gulp
 "While she did sit on me-"
 >Did Cookies' eye just twitch?
 "- I didn't invite her. I asked her to leave several times."
 >You turn to Sleepy
 "Back me up on this, I didn't want Bust on top of me"
 >Sleepy nods
 >"Anon did seem uncomfortable, and he did ask Bust to leave. I can't imagine why though."
 >Cookies seems to calm down again, though she still seems a bit upset
 >You take a bite of carrot and sigh
 >Stupid tittybull, making life hard
 >Sleepy's eyes widen as he comes to a sudden realization
 >"Anon, are you gay?"
 >You and Cookies both nearly choke on your food
 "Why would you think that?"
 >Sleepy shrugs
 >"You don't seem to show any interest in mares. That and most colts would give a leg to have a girl like Bust interested in them"
 >You shake your head
 " Like I mentioned in the arcade, I already have a girl. You can have Bust."
 >Sleepy chuckles
 >"Thanks, but she isn't really my type, she sure does look nice though"
 >Your conversation is interrupted by the sudden appearance of The Warden
 >Looks like Bust is following her
 >This could be trouble
 >"Hiya everypony! How are you all doing?"
 "I'm good"
 >Sleepy nods and Cookies mirrors your answer
 >Bust moves around the table to sit right next to you
 >Practically on top of you, actually
 >She has clearly never heard of leaving room for Jesus
 >"Hi Anon. How was your nap? I hope you had sweet dreams. I know I did"
 >She smiles at you and winks
 >You scootch to make some room, and she follows
 >You both repeat the motion
 >If this continues, you'll push Cookies right off the bench
 >You sigh and return the greeting
 "Hello Bust. Could you move over a bit?"
 >She giggles and nods
 >"Sure..."
 >She went in the wrong direction
 >This was not going according to plan
 >You give Cookies a plaintive look
 >Cookies is very pointedly only focusing on her meal, chewing a little too forcefully
 >You turn to Sleepy for help
 >Sleepy looks at your pudding cup hungrily
 >"So... ready to pay off your debt? This is the last cup"
 >Your arm feels like lead as you pass him the pudding
 >"Pleasure doing business with you"
 >The Warden beams at the sight of you and Bust sitting so close
 >"Guardspony Cookies, could you come with me for a moment?"
 >Cookies gives The Warden a curious look
 >"Ma'am?"
 >The Warden gestures at you and Bust and winks with all the subtly of a natural disaster
 >"I need to talk to you somewhere else, guardspony Cookies"
 >Cookies looks over at you with a worried expression
 >"But Warden, inmate Anon requires a chaperoning guard during meals."
 >The Warden smiles at you
 >"I'm sure Anon wouldn't want to jeopardize an entire month's worth of dessert by misbehaving while we aren't watching him"
 >Wait, what?
 >Since when was The Warden this strict about anything?
 >The Warden turns her gaze to Sleepy
 >"Inmate Sleepy, I'd like you to visit the Nurse. Your constant tiredness could be a sign of illness"
 >Sleepy looks up
 >"Warden, sleepy is literally my first name. I'm fine."
 >The Warden shakes her head
 >"I'm afraid I must insist. You /will/ go see the nurse"
 >Sleepy sighs and slowly nods
 >"Alright, I'll go after lunch"
 >The Warden leans in close to him and loudly whispers
 >"There's an extra pudding cup during dinner in it for you if you go now"
 >Sleepy shrugs and leaves, balancing his tray across his wings
 >"Come along guardspony Cookies..."
 >If this keeps up, all your backup will disappear!
 >You've got to do something!
 "uh... I need an adult?"
 >NAILED IT
 >Bust intertwines an arm with yours
 >"I am an adult"
 >CRITICAL FAILURE
 >The Warden nods and leaves
 >Cookies bites her lip and follows The Warden away from the table and out of the mess
 >Leaving you alone with Bust
 >Bust 'accidently' rests her hand on your leg
 "Woah there, watch where you're putting your hands!"
 >Bust giggles
 >"If you insist...."
 >...and now she is staring at your lap
 >lovely
 >This situation couldn't get any worse
 >"GET YOUR DIRTY HANDS OFF MY SISTER"
 >You just had to go and jinx it, didn't you...
 >"Aw come on Chain..."
 >The hulking minotaur walks up and glares at you from across the table
 >"Get away from her this second or else!"
 >You raise your entangled arm
 "I wish I could! I can't get away from her!"
 >Bust giggles and squeezes your arm
 >"Aw... How sweet.  I can't stay away from you either"
 >Chain's jaw clenches
 "That isn't what I meant"
 >"Shut it, monkey! Yo momma so fat, last time she visited town somepony yelled 'stampede!'"
 >AW HELL NAW!
 >Time for a rematch!
 "Yo momma so fat, her special talent is gravity!"
 >Chain snarles at you
 >the other inmates stare in awe as two titans clash
 >"Yo momma so fat, if she were a breezie she'd need a HURRICANE to move!"
 >Shit, that was good
 "Yo momma so fat, when she fell in love she broke it!"
 >Chain glares at you
 >"Yo momma so stupid, when she got locked in a grocery store she nearly starved to death."
 >Chain smirks
 >"She only survived because of her ample fat reserves"
 >Huh, you didn't expect him to be able to use complex words like those
 "Yo momma so ugly, her reflection said 'I quit!'"
 >Chain grunts in agitation
 >He's on the ropes!
 >" Yo momma so ugly not even poison joke could make her pretty"
 >That one had no effect on you
 >You don't even know what poison joke is
 "Oh yea? Yo momma so ugly, if she visits a zoo the staff won't let her leave"
 >Chain gulps
 >"Yo momma so ugly....it hurts her self esteem?"
 >That was weak
 >This is over
 >FINISH HIM
 " Yo sister so sweet-"
 >Bust jumps in surprise as you reference her
 >Chain's expression goes dark
 "- when I milk her, I get ice cream!"
 >Bust's jaw drops
 >Silence reigns in the mess
 >No one dares to breathe
 >Except for you
 >Chains has turned an interesting shade of purple  in his anger
 >"Why you... I'll... nreghit...bzalft.."
 >Bust can't even form a complete sentence
 >You laugh at his sputtering, adding insult to insult
 >"This isn't over, NERD!"
 >Chains beats a hasty retreat as you continue to laugh at his back
 >noise slowly returns to the mess as you return to your meal
 >Bust isn't moving
 >She's been staring at you since the start of the 'fight' with her brother
 >As you continue to eat she slowly regains the ability to move
 >Which first manifests itself as trembling
 >You continue to eat as she squeezes your arm and silently trembles, gazing at you in pure awe
 >"T-That  was a-amazing!"
 >Oh look, she can talk again
 >You shrug and continue eating
 >"I'm s-serious, you were s-spectacular!"
 >You nod, not letting her praise interrupt your meal
 >She wraps you in a tight hug, chest pressing comfortably against your shoulder
 >"Y-you can milk me anytime~"
 >You glance over at her
 >She bites her lip
 >She is actually blushing
 >You didn't know she could do that
 >You shake your head
 "I already have a girlfriend"
 >You finish your meal and put your tray away and leave the mess
 >Her eyes never leave you
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >Be going through the lunch line
 >You had been defeated
 >again
 >It wasn't a fair fight
 >He had the upper hand
 >He had already eaten
 >You hadn't eaten anything
 >You can't think when you haven't eaten
 >You take you filled tray and search for a good spot
 >....
 >That table there
 >It will give you a perfect view of Anon
 >If he tries anything funny with your sister, you'll be on him like stink on a monkey
 >You shove two ponies apart and sit in between
 >This here is the best spot to watch that lecher Anon
 >"H-Hey Diddly ho"
 >That voice is familiar
 >You look over
 >of course it was him
 >The yellow pony with a brown mane that you made cry earlier
 >You feel a gentle tapping on your other side
 >"You aren't going to be mean again, are you?"
 >And how could you forget his friend, the tan coated, blue haired 'brave one' that stood up against you for all of five seconds
 >"I-I'm Nice Sweater, and my friendo is Letter Lover"
 >You glare at the ponies
 "Shut up, both of you. I've got a monkey to watch"
 >"Okily dokily"
 >You feel Letter tap you again
 >"Why are you watching Anon?"
 >You try to ignore him and focus on Anon and your meal
 >He taps you again
 >and again
 >"Come on, why are you watching him?"
 >You take a deep breath....
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >..
 >...
 >....And let it out
 "Anon is trying to seduce my sister into doing something inappropriate"
 >Sweater gasps
 >"That son of a diddly!"
 >You couldn't have said it better yourself
 >Look at Anon, sitting over there clinging to your sister
 >It was sickening
 >That monkey will get his due
 >You can still beat him
 >You just need to fight smarter
 >Get him when he least expects it
 >You had to protect your sister
 >It was your job as the older brother
 >Ever since you were little, the two of you always had each other's backs in a pinch
 >It wasn't easy growing up as half-breed nobles
 >If you didn't save each other, no one would
 >Whenever she was in trouble, you'd scare the troublemakers away
 >Whenever you were in trouble with adults for fighting, she stood up for you and saved you
 >Your parents were distant because your very existence was a handicap to their political careers
 >Your sister was practically all the family you had
 >No one was good enough for her
 >Any male who wanted her would have to go through you
 >And while Anon may be putting up a ....respectable...resistance
 >You couldn't let him win
 >No weird monkey-thing was going to take your sister
 >She deserved better than that
 >She deserved someone that could give her the life that was her birthright as a noble
 
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >Wow
 >That Anon...
 >WOW
 >What a bucking tease!
 >He knew /just/ how to push your buttons
 >And he was pushing them /mercilessly/
 >You loved watching him move....
 >Oh, wait, he's already out of the mess
 >Aw hay biscuits!
 >You turn to your meal and try to focus on getting some nutrition
 >had to maintain your strength to win him over
 >Not to mention keep up your fantastic figure
 >You'd need that to win him over too
 >Your entire body feels hot, hotter than you've ever been
 >The air surrounding you felt freezing
 >Anon had been nice and warm~
 >You'd have to find him again after you finished eating...
 
 Be Sleepy
 >Be in the nurse's office
 >With the pretty nurse
 >Who is currently pressing her hooves against her temples, gently rubbing
 >"Let me get this straight, The Warden offered you extra dessert if you came here and interrupted me"
 >You nod
 >She sighs
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >She moves over towards a cabinet
 >"Alright, might as well get a checkup out of the way. What is your name?"
 "Sleepy Feathers"
 >She nods to herself and searches for your file
 >She turns back towards you while levitating a nearly empty file
 >"Looks like you are overdue for your annual physical... by three years"
 >You readjust your wings
 "Doctor visits are too much hassle. I'm fine"
 >She shakes her head
 >"Regular checkups are important. The rest of my work can wait."
 >She drops the file on her desk and magically locks the door
 >You glance back as you hear the click of the lock
 >"To ensure patient confidentiality. Now then, we'll start with your wings. Please extend them and flap"
 >You unfurl your wings and let them stretch out
 >You flap experimentally for her and a few downy feathers float away
 >She raises an eyebrow and inspects one of the feathers closely
 >She levitates a few into a small sample baggy and steps closer
 >"Good, now just extend them. I need to take a closer look"
 >You stop flapping your wings and leave them extended
 >She handles them surprisingly gently with her magic as she inspects them
 >"You have a larger than average wingspan, but your wings and back aren't very well toned. You should exercise them more... Though the sheer amount of down feathers does put you at risk of overheating. How often do you preen?"
 >Preening is an awkward subject
 >Pegasi only do it in private for a reason
 >You shrug
 "Often enough"
 >She shakes her head
 >"No, not often enough. This down has built up too much. I'd suggest you preen at least twice a week"
 >...
 "...daily..."
 >She turns to look at you
 >You feel yourself blushing
 >"What was that?"
 "I preen daily"
 >Her eyes go wide and she looks closer at your wings
 >"If that's true, your feather follicles are hyperactive. Why haven't you talked to a doctor about this until now?"
 >You shrug
 "Too much hassle...and besides, it's my livelihood"
 >She tilts her head
 "I make pillows. Right now I'm making one for Anon.  Nothing softer or more comfortable than my feathers"
 >She shakes her head
 >"This could still be the sign of a more serious problem."
 >She finally touches your wing with a hoof and gasps
 >You smirk
 >They were always caught off guard by the sheer softness
 >She gingerly pulls a few feathers apart to inspect the skin underneath
 >"Skin appears healthy... Do you feel stiff or sore regularly?"
 >You shake your head
 "Only when I sleep on them funny"
 >She nods and slowly moves on to examining the rest of your body
 >She stares into your eyes, shines a light into them to watch your eyes dilate back and forth
 >Her eyes are nice...
 >After inspecting your body, scribbling away in a notebook the entire time, she nods to herself
 >"You appear healthy, other than your down production. You could do with more physical exertion too.  I'd like you to come back again tomorrow for further tests."
 >You nod and yawn
 >You were sorely behind on your nap quota
 >Your yawn proves infectious, as the nurse yawns
 >"Please excuse me, I haven't been sleeping well. Now then, I've gotten all the information I can at this point. You may go"
 >She unlocks the door and turns away from you, towards her desk
 >You start to leave, but stop at the door
 "I never got your name"
 >She stays focused on the paperwork in front of her, not even sparing you a glance
 >"My name is Nurse Honey Heart"
 >You nod
 "Pretty"
 >She stiffens just the tiniest bit
 >Or maybe that was just your imagination?
 "Goodbye"
 >You head for your cell
 >You were late for your nap, and you still needed to preen away some of this down for Anon's pillow
 >It was nearly done
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be on your way to your cell
 >If you were really lucky, The Warden would release Cookies for her break soon
 >You'd get some well-deserved cuddles
 >You turn the hallway corner to find Cookies already waiting for you at your door
 >"ANON!"
 >She rushes over to you
 >"That cow didn't try anything, did she?"
 >You chuckle and scratch her ear
 >She sighs happily and leans into your hand
 "You know I'd never betray your trust like that. So... you on break?"
 >Cookies smiles hungrily
 >"You know it cuddlestud"
 >A pet name
 >This relationship just got serious
 >Neat!
 >You grin broadly as you open the door for her
 >She rushes in and launches herself into the bed, turning to face you with a coy smile and a little lip nibble
 >aw yea
 >You shut the door and follow her example, running to the bed
 >you dive in at an angle, sliding in right next to Cookies
 >You press your face against her chest fluff and breathe deep, right arm massaging her ear while your left held her shoulder
 >You feel her forelegs wrap around your head as she giggles
 >You rub your face in deeper and she presses her face against the top of your head
 >You can feel her breath against your head
 >She squeezes and takes a deep breath, enjoying the scent of your hair
 >You gently pull back and smile
 >She is blushing fiercely and returning your smile
 >You slide your left hand up her side, to her neck
 >You cradle the base of her head and nuzzle your nose against hers
 >She gives a soft laugh and gives you a peck on the lips
 >You press your forehead against hers and just hold her tight for a few seconds, eyes closed...
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >You open your eyes as Cookies gently pulls back and stands on the bed
 >You watch and roll onto your back as she side steps to straddle your chest and stomach
 >She gives you a mischievous smile
 >"Now then inmate Anon, I'm taking over..."
 >You like where this is going
 >"...Now be a good inmate and tell me how much you want to hug me. If you do a good enough job, I might let you"
 >Looks like she wants to make you beg
 >how adorable
 >That isn't happening
 >You know her weaknesses
 >You return her smile and reach up to her ears
 >She bites her lip as you rub and scratch
 >She lets out a happy sound as you gently bend and fold the cartilage
 >Her defenses lower, and so does she
 >She slowly presses more weight on you until she is entirely laying on you
 >One leg feebly kicks a little
 >You lean your head forward, your cheek to hers, and whisper
 "I don't beg"
 >You rest your head back again and continue your ministrations on her ears with your right hand
 >With your left, you gently stroke her back
 >she gives a contented sigh, her play for dominance forgotten
 >You chuckle and gently pinch her withers with your left hand
 >You move your hand farther up again to massage the back of her neck
 >This destroys any vestiges of willpower she had to keep her head up
 >You wrap your arms around her and squeeze
 >She presses her face against the crook of your neck and softly giggles
 >Her breath tickles
 >You can feel her heartbeat beating a fast rhythm
 >Your own heart feels full
 >As though there was a dense weight made out of the raw essence of playful kittens
 >You press your nose against the crook of her neck in return and inhale her scent, screwing your eyes closed
 >If you opened them too much, there was a risk your heart would explode
 >You stay like that for what feels like an eternity
 >"Well well well... what do we have here?"
 >Your eyes bolt open
 >Cookies goes rigid against you
 "Cookies... your voice didn't suddenly change to sound exactly like Bust's, did it?"
 >Cookies slowly retracts her head
 >her expression says it all
 >Cookies stiffly rolls off of you
 >Bust is standing in the doorway
 >...The ONE time you forget to lock it, this happens
 "uh...this isn't what it looks like?"
 >Bust smirks
 >"Really? Cause it looks like you and this guardpony were getting rather intimate."
 >Well shit
 >its exactly what it looks like then
 >...It was worth a shot?
 >Cookies looks imploringly at Bust
 >"Please don't tell anypony! If word got out, I might lose my job..."
 >Bust looks at you
 >"Anon, I thought you said you had a girlfriend outside the prison. You are one naughty boy"
 "Well...I am in prison"
 >Bust giggles
 >"So this must be your girlfriend...Cookies, right?"
  >Cookies numbly nods at Bust
 >"Don't worry, I won't say a word"
 >Wait
 >what?
 >Cookies looks thoroughly relieved
 >"Thank you!"
 >Bust smirks again
 >"If I got you fired, Anon would never forgive me. How would I win his heart then?"
 >Cookies bites her lip, some serious emotional conflict clearly going on inside her head
 >Bust enters the room fully, closing the door behind her
 >"And honestly, I don't mind sharing..."
 >Bust looks you dead in the eyes
 >"I'm sorry I called you androgynous when we first met. Now that I know you, I know you're more than man enough..."
 >She looks at Cookies and winks
 >"After seeing how much fun Anon was having with you, I'd like to give you a try"
 >Cookies looks at you
 >a look that says 'I need an adult'
 >The situation couldn't be more out of hand
 "How did you find my room?"
 >Bust beams a huge grin at you
 >"The Warden told me exactly where to find you"
 >...of course she did
 >There is a solid thumping at your door
 >Perfect
 >someone else
 >Just what the situation needed
 >"Anon, are you in there?"
 >That's nurse Honey Heart
 >Are you here?
 >Sure, everyone else is in your room
 "Yeah, I'm here. Door is unlocked"
 >Honey Heart opens the door and starts to walk into the room
 >Upon seeing Cookies and Bust both in your room, she raises an eyebrow
 >"I was wondering if you'd be willing to move up your donation. There is something I wish to discuss in addition to our deal"
 >Thank you based Honey Heart!
 >She just gave you an excuse to escape!
 "Sure thing Heart"
 >Time to play backup for Cookies
 "Hey Cookies, what is your next post?"
 >She gives you a confused look
 >"I'm running the arcade"
 >You point at the clock on your wall
 "Isn't your break almost up? You should head over there"
 >Understanding dawns on her
 >She gives you a grateful look
 >"Of course, how could I let the time escape from me like that. Thank you inmate Anonymous"
 >Cookies hops off your bed and hurries out the door
 >You turn to Bust
 "If you'll excuse me, I have an appointment with a Transylvanian"
 >Nurse Honey Heart raises an eyebrow
 >"I'm from Manehattan"
 "Nevermind, human reference. Goodbye, Bust"
 >Bust tilts her head
 >"Where are you going? Who is this?"
 >Oh she hadn't met Nurse Honey Heart yet
 >Lucky nurse
 "This is nurse Honey Heart. She is just taking me for boring medical stuff, you'd be bored"
 >Honey Heart begins taps a hoof impatiently
 >"Anon, this won't be a 'boring' procedure. I'm ready for you to donate blood now"
 >Bust gasps and looks at you wide eyed
 >"Are you really going to..."
 >Her voice fades out
 >You sigh and nod
 "eeyup, I'm sure nurse Heart wouldn't want any distractions"
 >Honey Heart shakes her head
 >"If you need emotional support, I'm fine with it."
 >Bust vigorously nods
 >"I want to be there for him!"
 >Looks like you aren't getting out of this one
 >The indirect approach didn't work
 >And you can't outright refuse
 >Bust may have promised to not to blab about your secret relationship with Cookies, but pushing her away too forcefully could prove disastrous
 >You'd have to let her come along
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Be walking with Anon and his friend
 >You're about halfway back to your office
 >You'd already read her file in preparation for her arrival
 >Looks like she's already attached herself to Anon
 >Either Anon is shy about their relationship, or she is being overly aggressive
 >She keeps trying to entwine her arms with his, while he keeps trying to extract himself
 >Either way, they shouldn't touch like that in public
 >You pass a few inmates who wave hello
 >You nod back and Anon attempts to waveback but is too entangled with Bust
 >She finally gives up about halfway to your office and just walks next to Anon
 >You would need that arm in a few moments anyway
 >You all arrive at your office, and you use your magic to open the door
 >As they both shuffle in behind you, you magically close the door behind them
 "Please lie down on the examination table and we'll begin as soon as I finish the final preparations"
 >Anon nods and lies down
 >Bust pulls up a stool to sit at the head of the table, near Anon's head
 >She appears far more nervous than he is
 >You magically move the necessary instruments into place and begin sterilizing the crook of his arm
 >Once the area is thoroughly sterilized, you levitate the needle close to his arm
 >Until Bust jumps off her chair and rushes into your way
 >"WAIT! You forgot to give Anon any anesthetic!"
 >Anon clears his throat and Bust turns to face him
 >"I'm not getting any anesthetic. The chemicals would mess with my blood and spoil the sample. Besides, she doesn't have anything more powerful than aspirin"
 >Bust looks back and forth between Anon and the needle
 >"But look at the size of that needle! You don't have to act tough anymore, please don't! I don't want you to get hurt..."
 >Anon chuckles
 >"Don't worry about me, I've done this before and survived"
 >Bust bites her lip and slowly returns to her seat
 >Good
 >Now you can actually get this started
 >"Please be careful with him... How long will he have to leave it in?"
 "Anywhere from fifteen to thirty minutes"
 >Bust looks about ready to panic
 >"That's too long! You might kill him!"
 >Anon laughs
 >"I doubt it, she's only taking a pint"
 >Bust starts to hyperventilate
 >"YOU CAN'T LOSE THAT MUCH!"
 >You sigh
 >This will take a while
 >You shouldn't have let Anon bring her
 >"Yes I can, I've done it before back home. Nurse Heart, please stick the needle in already. The waiting is the hardest part"
 >Bust begins to object again, until she sees Anon frown at her
 >She slumps back onto her stool and nervously chews a knuckle
 >You nod and focus on finding a vein in Anon's arm
 >Finding a vein, you insert the needle into his arm
 >Anon takes a sharp breath and Bust lets out a small whimper
 >Blood begins to flow from Anon's arm, through the needle and a tube, and to a nearby bag
 >Anon lets out the breath and chuckles
 >"And now we wait"
 >Bust just stares at the needle
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >Be leaving the little minotaur's room
 >Ugh, Sweater and Letter have been following you around since lunch
 >They insist on helping you
 >They couldn't insult their way out of a paper bag, and they want to help you take down a monster like Anon
 >Talk about stupid
 >Letter taps your arm as you pass
 >"Hey Chain, can we please help you protect your sister now? We have interesting information!"
 >You sigh
 "Fine, but you gotta call me boss if you want to be my underlings"
 >Sweater beams
 >"Okily dokily Bosserino!"
 >You pinch the bridge of your nose
 "So what is this 'interesting' information?"
 >Letter points down the hall
 >"We just saw Anon, Nurse Honey Heart, and your sister walking towards the nurses office!"
 >Curse that monkey for daring to walk with your sister!
 >Wait...the nurse?
 >If Anon is hurt or sick, that could give you the advantage!
 "Good work, where is the nurses office?"
 >Letter taps you and motions for you to follow
 >"This way"
 >You all set out for the nurses office
 >You'd get Anon this time
 >You'd destroy him in front of your sister, and teach him a lesson he'd never forget!
 
 Be Anon
 >Be lying down
 >With a needle in your arm
 >With a bottom-up view of Bust's chesticles as she leans over you
 >She's gently massaging the sides of your head
 "Please stop touching my head. I'm fine"
 >She presses a little more firmly
 >"Shhh... I'll take care of you... Don't worry about a thing, it'll be over soon"
 >You sigh
 >Seems like she's in her own little world of worry
 >Honey Heart looks away, awkwardly trying to give you both privacy in the small space
 >Looks like you just had to accept it
 >Not that it felt bad...
 >Or that you didn't enjoy the view....
 >But still, you didn't like the idea of Cookies potentially stumbling upon this scene
 >You being drained while Bust rested her funbags on your forehead
 >Such a scenario could only end poorly
 >Hell, if anyone came in right now, it'd be a bad time for everyone involved
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >The door swings open suddenly, making you and Bust jump in surprise
 >The needle wiggles painfully in your arm, but stays in
 >"ANON! yo momma so fat....."
 >Chain storms into the room but stops when he sees you lying on the table, with his sister hovering over you
 >With a needle impaling your arm
 >He blanches and gulps
 >Looks like the sight of you being drained stunned him
 >Time to show him once and for all that he can't beat you
 "Yo momma so fat, her fridge has stretch marks!"
 >Chain blinks in surprise
 >"W-what?"
 >He had only just come to terms with you losing blood
 >He was totally unprepared for you to launch an assault
 >His eyes go wide
 >"How can you think with painkillers?!"
 >You smirk at him
 "I'm not on any painkillers. I'm fully aware"
 >He takes a step back
 >"Impossible! No one can withstand a needle without painkillers!"
 >You laugh
 "Oh yea? Could I still insult you if I was under the influence? Yo momma so fat, it takes Luna two nights to enter her dreams!"
 >His jaw drops, but he quickly recovers and shakes his head
 >He laughs shakily
 >"It's all just a trick, that's just water with red dye and that isn't a real needle"
 >Bust shakes her head
 >"It's all real, that's a real needle and it's really in his arm!"
 >She turns back to you and rests her hands back on the sides of your head
 >She gently rubs her thumbs in small circular motions around your cheekbones
 >Chain takes another step backward
 >Honey Heart finally recovers from the shock of his entrance
 >"You can't come in here and pick a fight with my patient! GET OUT!"
 >She uses her magic to levitate him out of the room and close the door behind him
 >The door locks with a loud click
 >Bust looks down at you, worry written plain as day across her face
 >Tinged with just a little bit of excitement
 >"You shouldn't push yourself like that"
 >You smirk
 "Like what? I already told you, I'm fine"
 >You turn to Honey Heart
 "So nurse Heart, you mentioned you wanted to talk about something?"
 >Honey Heart nods
 >"I understand you are friends with the inmate Sleepy Feathers, is that true?"
 >You nod
 "Yea, he's a good guy. Hard to read when you first meet him though"
 >Honey Heart nods and turns to focus intently on one of the medical posters on the wall
 >"Tell me more about him"
 >She must be trying to get your focus off the needle in your arm
 "Sure. He may appear dopey and quiet, but he hides a ruthless intelligence underneath. Once he finds something he wants, he'll find a way to get it."
 >You chuckle
 "Of course, he usually only wants to sleep or get extra dessert"
 >"I see... does he have a special somepony?"
 >Honey Heart's face is tinged with the slightest shade of pink
 >...Or maybe it was just your imagination
 >You shake your head
 "I don't think so"
 >Honey Heart nods to herself again
 >Hrm...
 >Maybe she isn't trying to distract you from the needle?
 "Nurse Heart, are you interested in Sleepy?"
 >She stiffens ever so slightly and purses her lips
 >"I'm just making sure one of the inmates under my care is mentally healthy too."
 >You chuckle
 >Heart may be able to lie to The Warden, but you can see right through
 "Come on, tell me honestly.  Maybe I can help"
 >She sighs and turns to face you
 >Her gaze is glued to the floor just beyond her right hoof
 >"...He said my name was pretty"
 >She smiles slightly
 >aw...
 >adorable
 >You grin at her
 "Just listen to ol' uncle Anon. I'll set you on the right path with Sleepy"
 
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >"Just listen to ol' uncle Anon. I'll set you on the right path with Sleepy"
 >Anon has agreed to help you
 >Excellent
 "You said he mostly enjoys sleeping and eating. what else can you tell me?"
 >Anon smiles
 >"Well, first things first, you are in luck. I think he has a thing for unicorns"
 >You touch your horn with a hoof self-consciously
 >"He's also in the book club, and has one powerful sneeze..."
 >You float a pad and pencil over as Anon continues to spill the beans on Sleepy
 >If you were going to do this, you were going to do it right
 >You listen carefully, jotting down notes all the while
 >It had been a very long time since anypony showed any interest at all
 >You had been married to your work for so long, your options had dried up before you were ready to exploit them
 >Leaving you alone on Hearts and hooves day while everypony else was happy
 >You were sick and tired of the sad look you got from friends every year
 >You were sick of your mother nagging you
 >You were sick of being alone
 >And this Sleepy Feathers was attractive enough, good build
 > insanely soft...
 >There had to be a serious downside with him somehwhere
 >That was the only way he could still be single
 >You raise a hoof to get Anon's attention
 "What about his negative qualities?"
 >Anon thinks for a few seconds
 >"Well... Like I mentioned before, he can be ruthless when it comes to business. Even with friends. He also, as his name implies, sleeps a lot. I mean, a whole lot. He was put in prison for obstructing traffic by sleeping in the middle of the road"
 >Maybe he has glandular issues?
 >Should be handled easily enough with medicine
 >Of course, that same medicine could interfere with those magnificent wings of his
 >You'd have to bring it up with Sleepy, give him the option to try the medication if he wants
 >And if he sleeps all the time, that would give you plenty of time to work guilt-free
 >And you've always liked stallions who know what they want and how to get it
 >His 'negatives' are shaping up to be positives
 >"...That about wraps it up. I'll talk to Sleepy later on and test the waters for you"
 >You nod
 "Thank you Anonymous"
 >Anon grins back
 >"Sure thing. After all, what are friends for?"
 
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >Still be in the nurses office with Anon
 >He's been draining over what feels like an eternity
 >You continue to try and soothe him by gently rubbing his head
 >even though he seemed more bored than upset
 >This male....
 >Even though you had only met him this morning, he had blown all expectations out of the water
 >He was smart, kind, and the toughest creature you'd ever met
 >At first you only teased and flirted out of habit, but now...
 >He was simply astounding
 >You check the clock
 >He's been sitting with a needle in his arm for twenty minutes
 >...How did he do this? How could he just relax there, bored, with a bucking /needle/ in his arm?!
 >He raises his free arm and waves a hand in front of your face
 "huh, what was that for?"
 >He chuckles
 >"I've been trying to talk to you for a couple minutes. I'm bored. Entertain me."
 >You blink
 >What could he possibly mean by /that/?
 >You glance around for the nurse
 >"Honey Heart left a few minutes ago to do some quick errands "
 >So you were alone together
 >neat
 "H-how can I entertain you?"
 >"Talk to me, I've been sitting here in dead silence for ten minutes"
 >You gulp and nod
 >You can barely think straight right now, but Anon needs you to hold a conversation
 "Sure, what do you want to talk about?"
 >Anon furrows his brow
 >"I dunno... what are your favorite foods?"
 "I really like salted caramel apples for dessert. My favorite meal depends on my mood"
 >Anon nods
 "What about you?"
 >"I /love/ pudding. I'm happy with the fruits and vegetables I get here, but I do really miss real human food"
 >You tilt your head
 "What do you mean 'real human food'?"
 >Anon's eyes unfocus slightly
 >"I used to love jerky, pizza and steak"
 "The prison serves pizza during lunches"
 >Anon's eyes snap back into focus
 >"That isn't like human pizza, I can't eat it"
 "Why not?"
 >Anon grimaces
 >"...The cheese is all wrong. And I don't like the toppings.  I mean Diced carrots? Really?"
 >You giggle
 >You never understood that topping either
 "What are those other two though? I've never heard of steak or jerky before"
 >Anon smiles sheepishly
 >"eh...forget I mentioned those"
 >You shake your head
 "I won't. If I can make those for you, I will. You've gone through so much today, if I can treat you to something special to make you feel better then that's what I want to do"
 >Anon chuckles nervously
 >"Seriously, it is impossible to get those foods here"
 >You smile at him
 "I may be in this prison, but I'm still part nobility. I can probably get it for you"
 >Anon shakes his head firmly
 >"Not even Celestia herself could get me those foods"
 >You frown
 "But why?"
 >Anon sighs and mumbles something
 "What was that?"
 >"...meat.."
 >Huh?
 "Huh?"
 >"Jerky and steak are types of meat. Humans are omnivores, we eat plants and meat."
 >No way
 "You're pulling my tail..."
 >Anon shakes his head again
 >"just look at my teeth if you need proof"
 >Anon opens his mouth and his lips peel back, giving you your first real look at his teeth
 >His teeth are obviously designed to rip and tear
 >And the points on those canines...
 >u-unf
 >Predators are hot
 "S-so what kind of meat is steak and jerky?"
 >Anon closes his mouth
 >"Usually beef... cow meat, but the cows are dumb as rocks where I come from. Not sentient!"
 >WHAT?!
 >This creature thought your mother's side of the family would make a good meal
 >U-UNF
 >Wait...
 "How can you eat a whole cow? Even griffons only eat small animals"
 >"My people would share and store leftovers."
 >That makes sense...
 >The door opens as Honey Heart returns, levitating a food tray laden with juices, cookies, and pudding
 >"I'm back, and I brought refreshments for when I unplug you. You will need the sugar and nutrition."
 >Anon smiles and eyes the tray hungrily
 >The nurse lays the tray on her desk and examines the blood bag
 >You feel a little nauseas as the sanguine liquid sloshes a little
 >"I'd say I have more than enough here. Thank you again, Anon"
 >Anon nods and Honey Heart approaches him
 >She bends the tube closed to prevent further suction on the vein, and carefully removes the needle
 >Anon grimaces as Heart extracts the metal sliver from his arm
 >She quickly levitates a clean rag over the crook of his arm and gently forces his arm to bend around it
 >"And that's it. I'll get this sample refrigerated for now. When I get back you may straighten your arm again."
 >Anon nods and sighs
 >Then chuckles
 >"I'm glad that's over"
 "I thought you said you were fine"
 >Anon looks up at you
 >"Well, things could have certainly been better but I wasn't in real pain"
 >A few moments later Honey Heart returns and Anon straightens his arm experimentally
 >He really shouldn't be putting that much stress on an injured arm...
 "Doesn't it still hurt?"
 >Anon shakes his head
 >"Honestly, it just feels good to be able to move it freely again. It's only a little sore"
 >Honey Heart pulls out a chair by her desk
 >"Your refreshments are ready whenever you are. Bust, help Anon to the chair"
 >You dart around to the side of the examination table to help Anon
 >Anon shakes his head and sits up
 >"I can handle this myself. I'm fine"
 >He swings his legs off the side of the table and hops to his feet
 >Honey Heart frowns
 >"Nurse's orders. Bust, you WILL help Anon."
 >Anon grumbles and tries to take a step but stumbles
 >You help him catch his footing and support him to the desk, much to his chagrin
 >"...Thank you Bust"
 >You beam a smile at him
 "No problem!"
 >Anon turns back to the tray and presses his hands together tightly in anticipation
 >Then a few of them snap
 "YOUR FINGERS!"
 >HE LOST TOO MUCH BLOOD!
 >HIS BONES ARE LIKE GLASS NOW!
 >Anon lets out a mix between sigh and chuckle
 >"Don't worry, popping sounds like that are a normal human thing, I'm fine. Though I'll be better once I have some of this pudding inside me..."
 >This human was just full of surprises...
 >Anon takes a spoonful of pudding into his mouth and lets out a moan of pleasure, screwing his eyes tight
 >...
 >He /really/ enjoys that pudding
 >...that gives you an idea
 >You'd have to work it out with The Warden, but it could give you an advantage with Anon...
 >Anon finishes his 'meal' and leans back in his chair with a contented smile
 >"That was great, thank you nurse Heart. Welp, I'm going to go take a nap in my cell."
 >He stands and turns towards you
 >"Bust, please let me be alone for now"
 >You nod, but do your best to emphasize your assets to try and make him change his mind
 >No luck, Anon turns back to Heart and gives her a little salute
 >Honey Heart nods back at him and he steps out of the room
 >A little wobbly, but you stay where you are
 >You promised to leave him alone for now
 >And besides, this was the perfect opportunity to stare at his butt...
 >Anon sure has a nice butt~
 >Honey Heart clears her throat
 >"If you'll excuse me, I have a lot of work to get done."
 >She motions towards the door
 >With no reason to stay behind any longer, you leave the office
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >It was official
 >Anon was tougher than you
 >He had just been lying there, letting his life juice pour out!
 >And all the while, your sister hovered over him tenderly
 >You feel a tap on the side of your hip
 >"How'd it go boss?"
 >You glare down at Letter
 >And then slump down
 >Sitting in the middle of the hall, you press your hands against your face
 >What was the use?
 >You had already lost
 >There was no way to bring down Anon
 >"That bad?"
 >You nod, still holding your head
 "I can't beat Anon. He is too strong. I've lost my sister..."
 >"Maybe you've been trying the wrong approach with this diddly dastard"
 >You glare at Sweater
 "The Tartarus does that mean?"
 >Sweater grins at you
 >"You've been trying for a one-on-one confrontation. Where there are friendos, there is power"
 >You feel a tap on your other side
 >"Yea boss, strength in numbers"
 >You laugh bitterly
 "You two couldn't fight your way out of a damp paper bag. Just stop, there's no hope..."
 >Sweater shakes his head
 >"Not just us. This is a whole diddly prison full of tough ponies. Get them to be your friendos, and Anon won't know what fiddled his diddles"
 >They were right
 >You could still win!
 >All you had to do was turn the prison against him!
 >You beam a grin at the two ponies
 "Good work underlings!"
 >You stand up
 >You had a lot of work ahead of you
 >You wouldn't have it any other way...
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcDsHDavmTY&list=PLWdBPQ-SVXCQfqJ_FSKN_2gRsZORUEzZz&index=7
 >You smile
 "Come on boys, we've got work to do..."
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Well this sucked
 >hard
 >like, really hard
 >like, really really hard
 >like, really /really/ hard
 >You were sitting behind the prize counter in the arcade
 >With an almost painful itch across your entire body
 >Stopping midway through a cuddle session was bad enough...
 >But to be caught by /her/
 >Of all the people to catch you, it had to be that cow...
 >You didn't know how to feel about her flirting with you
 >In front of Anon, no less!
 >You bite your lip
 >At least she promised not to tell anypony
 >Small comfort
 >You shake the thoughts from your head
 >Time for work, not worry
 >...It would be easier if your coat didn't feel so /tight/
 >Like your skin shrunk by one size
 >If only you had some more private time with Anon
 >He would rub the stiffness away in no time~....
 >You sigh
 >Still several hours until dinner
 >You watch as the gamer ponies play and laugh together
 >You wish you could play with Anon
 >An actual date to the arcade would be fun
 >You could see it now, jamming out with Anon on a rhythm game...
 >His fingers dancing across a plastic guitar while you set the beat on the drums
 >...He might not be magical, but he could certainly do magical things with those hands
 >This will be a long shift...
 
 Be Sleepy
 >Be experiencing something completely new
 >A most troubling development
 >Honestly, something you had long ago declared impossible
 >...you were having trouble falling asleep
 >You had spent the last twenty minutes staring at the walls and ceiling of your cell
 >You turn to your side
 >Every time you close your eyes, you could see that nurse
 >It was insanity!
 >You'd only met her today!
 >And you'd only had roughly fifteen minutes worth of interaction!
 >you turn to your other side
 >...But all the same, something about her was stuck in your head
 >You grumble meaninglessly and stretch a wing to cover your face
 >This 'sleep mask' position /always/ put you right to sleep
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >No dice, even this ace in the hole position was uncomfortable
 >You growl in agitation and angrily move out of the bed
 >You didn't like being unable to sleep
 >You move over to your workstation and begin to roughly preen your wings
 >About the only bright side to your insomnia...
 >You'd have Anon's pillow finished tonight
 >Time passes as you finish filling the pillow
 >....
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >You carefully place the final feather in the exquisite cloth sack
 >With every feather in place, you prepare your sewing supplies
 >With ultimate diligence and discipline, you begin sewing the pillow closed
 >The work takes a full hour, but it passes in a blink
 >You step back and admire your hoofiwork
 >Your modified horseshoe stitch held everything together perfectly
 >You carefully rest your head on the pillow to quality test it
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >Perfect
 >Time to test the sound canceling abilities of the pillow
 >You open your door and are immediately assaulted by a wave of sound as inmates move around the halls
 >You gently press the pillow around your head and once again, all is silent
 >Perfect
 >Time for your least favorite test...
 >You roughly throw the pillow against the wall of your cell and stomp on it until it is thoroughly trampled
 >After brutally trampling the pillow, you lift it and check for feather leaks
 >Nothing
 >You fluff the pillow and check to make sure it hasn't lost its firmness or form
 >It looks as though nothing at all happened
 >Perfect
 >You had created another masterpiece
 >You yawn and check the clock
 >Still plenty of time before dinner
 >Working always tired you out
 >You close your door and place the pillow back on your workstation
 >You'd deliver it after dinner
 >You flutter to the bed and collapse on top, starting to drift away even as you fall
 >You smile as sleep claims you, filling your head with lovely fantasies in a nurses office
 
 Be Nice Sweater
 >Today was such a lovely day in the neighborhood
 >The birds were singing outside, ponies were laughing and playing in the halls
 >And you had such a good new friend
 >Sure, he wasn't very nice when you first met...
 >But he warmed right up to you
 >He had just been upset that his sister was being treated poorly by that doodle Anon
 >You smile and wave to the passersby as you trot down the hall
 >You finally arrive at your first destination
 >The arcade
 >Most of these games were much too competitive for you
 >You weren't here for the games anyway
 >You had business with the leaders of the Nerd herd
 >Radian Measure, a green coated stallion with a brown mane and Two Pi, a purple coated mare with a red mane
 >You spot them at the far end of the arcade, where tables had been set up for card games
 >They were giving eachother a high-hoof while two other nerd ponies sulked
 >"Way to go Radian!"
 >The stallion beams a broken, braced smile at the mare
 >"I'm nothing without you Two Pi!"
 >They both start laughing as though the funniest joke ever was just told
 >Nerds are weird
 >You shake your head
 >That was a down-diddly-right mean thing to think
 >You trot up to them
 "Howdy-ho neighborinos! I have an offer for you from Bronze Chain, the new minotaur"
 >They look over at you, and Radian steps forward
 >"What does he want with us?"
 >You beam a smile at him
 "He wants your help taking down the dangerous inmate Anon"
 >Pi steps forward
 >"And why would we agree to do that?"
 >You turn your grin to her
 "Simple, who would dare mess with you once a minotaur is your friendo? You'd never have to fear bullies again"
 >The two exchange a look
 >"And what if we refuse?"
 "Why, you're either with us or against us. And we all know your clique is the weakest"
 >Radian frowns
 >"So it's join or be bullied?"
 "You got it buddy-boy!"
 >You weren't threatening them
 >You were warning them
 >You knew firsthand how scary Chain could be
 >You were scaring them for their own good
 >"Please give us a moment"
 >You nod and the two step a little ways away
 >You can't make out what they are saying over the beeps, blips, and boings of the games around you
 >But you can easily see that they are having an animated discussion
 >They both look back at you, debate again, then look back
 >Pi slowly walks back over to you as Radian moves to pick up the cards from the earlier game
 >"Deal, we are in. The nerd herd will support Bronze Chain against Anon"
 
 Be Letter Lover
 >Be on your way to the gym
 >Not to work out though
 >Even though you would like to...
 >You were going there to talk to the head of the gym crowd
 >Lean Ligaments
 >You enter the gym and approach the massive steel-hued pony
 >You tap what feels like a body made of solid steel
 "Excuse me, I'm here on behalf of Bronze Chain"
 >Lean Ligaments looks away from the excercise machine
 >"What does he want?"
 >What a husky voice
 "Your partnership against the dangerous human Anonymous. He's dishonoring Chain's sister, Bust"
 >Ligaments brushes their black mane out of the way
 >"Sure! No mare should ever be treated that way"
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >Be meeting with the leader of the imprisoned nobles
 >Blue Dancer
 >Apparently, he had a white coat and had a golden mane
 >Never worked a day in his life, but he had pull around the prison
 >You'd need him as an ally if you wanted to control the prison
 >You step into the dance hall, where the stallion was dancing as the band clique played
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUID0jSh2Ic
 >Perfect, two pony clique leaders at once
 >You step up to the dance floor and stand there until he notices you
 >He frowns and raises an eyebrow, not slowing his dancing in the slightest
 >"Can you get off the stage? You're cramping my style"
 >You shake your head
 "Not until you promise to help me. I understand you are also a noble, well my sister is being courted by the lowest of plebeians: Anonymous"
 >Blue Dancer stops moving and gasps
 >"We can't let that phony continue! I'll help you to the max! "
 >He turns towards the band
 >"Yo Spit Valve, you and your cats gonna be there or be square?"
 >You turn towards the band as a brass coated pony with a brown mane nods
 >Blue Dancer nods excitedly
 >"Most excellent, I can dig it!"
 >He turns back to you
 >"We got your back, daddy-o"
 >You grin back at him
 >This was going swimmingly
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be woken up by a knocking at your door
 >You glance over at your clock
 >Dinner time
 >You manage to pull yourself out of bed and to the door
 >"Hiya Anon!"
 >You smile at Cookies
 "Hey, how's my favorite guard doing?"
 >She starts to smile back, but quickly stops
 >"Fine, but uh Anon... you look terrible. I mean just awful, what happened?"
 >Well, there goes your self esteem down the toilet
 >You thought you were looking pretty good for a guy who lost a pint and wasn't allowed to shave
 "Well..."
 >It might not be such a great idea to let Cookies know you let Honey Heart drain you
 >no, she deserved to know
 "...I promised to let Honey Heart take a few samples for scientific research outside of the prison. One of the samples she needed was a blood sample"
 >Cookies nods thoughtfully, until you mention blood
 >Her eyes go wide
 >She scours you with her gaze, looking for any sign of injury
 >Her eyes settle on your arm, discolored from the disinfectant and bruising slightly
 >Her eyes fill with tears and she shakily raises a hoof against your arm
 >She looks up at you, tears already starting to cascade down her cheeks
 >"W-Why didn't you tell me this was going to happen? I would have been there for you!"
 >You smile sheepishly at her
 "You had duties you couldn't avoid, and I didn't want you to worry"
 >She tries to argue, but all that comes out is a weak wail
 >You usher her fully into your room as her body is wracked by sobs
 >You close the door for privacy and kneel down to comfort her
 >Her fur pokes against the sensitive flesh on the crook of your arm where the needle was
 >Cookies wraps her forelegs around you and presses her head against your chest
 "I'm sorry, it's all fine now, I'm okay, you're okay. No need to cry..."
 >She is shaking violently between sobs
 >You pet her mane with one hand as she continues to cry into your shirt
 >All the while, you coo softly to her and reassure her that everything is fine
 >Her sobs and wails slowly turn into hiccups and sniffles
 >Her shaking slowly becomes occasional shivers
 >Finally, she gently pushes you away
 >You smile down at her, and she barely manages a weak smile back
 >*sniffle*
 >That just wasn't fair
 >She looks down at your chest and blushes
 >"I-I'm sorry... I g-got your shirt all m-messy..."
 >You chuckle and play with her ears
 "Don't worry about it."
 >She gives you a genuine smile and closes her eyes, leaning into your hands
 >She lets out a happy sigh as her leg twitches
 >You smile
 >You love it when she does that
 >She blinks a few times to expel the last of the excess moisture and looks into your eyes
 >"I don't deserve a guy like you"
 >You raise an eyebrow
 "What is that supposed to mean?"
 >She blushes and bites a lip, looking away
 >She takes her time before answering
 >"Well, I mean you were willing to keep such a scary thing a secret so you wouldn't upset me. You probably wouldn't have told me if I hadn't pointed it out. You would have kept it all bottled inside to keep me happy..."
 >She sniffles again and rests her head on your shoulder
 >"Thank you for thinking of me... but please let me know next time something scary is happening, I want to be there for you."
 "Alright, I'll let you know in advance next time"
 >Cookies leans into you again, and you both just enjoy the feel of each other pressed together
 >Cookies pulls back suddenly, her eyes bolting open
 >"We're going to be late for dinner!"
 >Damn!
 >You completely forgot about dinner
 >You check the clock...
 >Damn! Really late!
 "Come on!"
 >You start to move towards the door-
 >"WAIT!"
 >You turn to look at Cookies, who is biting her lip
 >"I can't go out there looking like I just cried, my reputation as the toughest guard would be ruined!"
 "Wait, you are the toughest guard?"
 >Cookies frowns at you
 >"Yes I am! I was the only guard to volunteer to watch you, after all"
 >She has a point
 >Most inmates and guards mostly avoided you
 "Well, you are certainly the bravest. You do look like you've been crying... Here, you can use my bathroom to wash up. I'll help"
 >Cookies smiles and blushes
 >"O-okay"
 
 Be Cookies
 "O-okay"
 >Anon just invited you into his bathroom
 >To wash up
 >And he said he'd help...
 > You self-consciously trot into the bathroom and plop yourself down by the sink
 >Anon follows and wets a cloth
 >The cloth is nice and warm as Anon gently rubs your face with small circular motions
 >You close your eyes as Anon works, simply enjoying the treatment
 >Anon was such a wonderful stallio-er, man...
 >So selfless, caring, and yet he was also the toughest person you'd ever met
 >And being in a prison, you knew a LOT of tough ponies
 >You turn your head slightly and catch a whiff of his scent off his wrist
 >...He always smelled so....primal
 >That was the only word for it
 >Dangerous, almost musky, foreign, and slightly salty
 >You hold that breath for several second, holding his smell in your nose
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >You breathe out with a contented sigh
 >Anon's motions slow and he removes the cloth from your face
 >His other had remains cupped against your jawline
 >Anon directs your face upwards and you start to open your eyes
 >You barely have them open halfway before Anon leans down and steals a kiss
 >A jolt of electricity runs down your spine pleasantly
 >He holds the kiss for several seconds, lips smiling against yours
 >He pulls back with a chuckle
 >"I'd say you look just perfect"
 >It feels like your heart is beating in your throat
 "T-thanks for cleaning me up"
 >Anon grins
 >"You'd look good even if you were covered in mud"
 >You giggle
 "Flattery will get you nowhere"
 >Anon tilts his head and smirks
 >"Then what will get me somewhere?"
 >You stick out your tongue at him
 "You could try walking! We are late for dinner, remember?"
 >Anon rubs his hand slowly across your back
 >Causing the remaining sparks from the kiss to jump between your vertebrae
 >By Celestia did that feel good~
 >"well, you are so adorable I could just eat you up"
 >You giggle again
 "Anon, what am I going to do with you?"
 >He wiggles his eyebrows and scratches an ear
 >"I can think of a few things..."
 >You laugh
 "Down boy! Dinner first, cuddles later!"
 >Anon gives you a puppy-eyes look and even trembles his lip slightly
 >You authoritatively point a hoof out towards the door
 >Anon sighs sadly and hangs his head in defeat
 >If Anon wasn't obviously playing around, you'd feel guilty
 >You check the mirror before following him
 >...
 >He really did do a good job of cleaning you up
 >You turn and trot after him
 >You couldn't wait to have him all to yourself tonight
 
 Be The Warden
 >TODAY WAS A GOOD DAY!
 >Your friends were happy!
 >Bust had talked to you about getting a job in the prison to help out and earn extra desserts
 >Honey Heart was actually eating in the mess! That never happened!
 >You skip through the mess, greeting your inmates and guards as you saw them
 >You come to a stop at Bronze Chain's table
 >The table is packed
 "Good evening everypony! Chain, I'm so glad to see you making friends!"
 >eight pairs of eyes turn to look at you
 >Chain lazily waves at you while the others give you a proper greeting
 >You never would have expected Chain to be so good at making such diverse friends!
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be walking into the mess
 >REALLY late
 >You and Cookies hurry through the meal counter and head towards your usual table
 >Bust is already there, as is Sleepy...
 >...and nurse Honey Heart?
 >Weird
 >She's never eaten with you before
 >You approach the table and you both sit down
 >Cookies is sitting in between you and Bust
 >Making Bust pout
 >You ignore her reaction and turn towards Sleepy and Honey who are sitting across from you
 "Hello Sleepy, nurse Heart"
 >They nod back to you in sync
 >Sleepy does so lazily, Honey does so curtly
 >They both are focusing intently on their meals
 >Cookies notices the newcomer to the table
 >"Honey, good to see you. What brings you to our table today?"
 >Honey swallows the food in her mouth
 >"I decided I wanted to try eating in here today. This was the only seat open"
 >Now that was just a blatant lie
 >You chuckle and turn towards your meal
 >You start to take a sip from your juice...
 >...damn, that doesn't smell right!
 >You recoil from the offending beverage, drawing the attention of everyone at the table
 >Cookies reacts first
 >"Anon, what's wrong?"
 "My juice doesn't smell right. I think it may have spoiled"
 >Cookies tilts her head in confusion
 >"But we only just got new juices. It should be fine... here, let me take a look"
 >You nod and hand over the juice
 >Cookies gently swirls it in the cup, sniffs it, then shrugs and takes an experimental mouthful
 >She hands back the drink
 >"I didn't notice anything wrong"
 >You frown
 "I'm not going crazy, there is something wrong with this juice. You shouldn't have drank any"
 >Bust waves at you from the far side of the table
 >"Let me try, everyone knows minotaurs have a better sense of smell"
 >Honey Heart clears her throat
 >"That isn't true"
 >You shrug and pass the drink to Bust, who goes through the same process as Cookies and finishes with a gulp of juice
 >"I'm sorry Anon... I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary either"
 "I'm telling you, there is something wrong with my drink!"
 >Sleepy motions the drink over
 >"My turn, I'll settle this"
 >You sigh as Bust passes Sleepy the juice
 >Once again, a gulp is taken
 >He shakes his head and shrugs
 >Honey Heart levitates the drink over and examines the remaining liquid carefully
 >After several seconds of intense scrutiny, she tries some of the juice
 >She shakes her head and levitates the cup back to you...
 >...only to have it be intercepted by The Warden, who also takes a gulp
 >"Tastes sweeter than usual"
 >At least someone agrees with you that something is different about the juice
 "Thank you Warden, no one else could taste any difference"
 >She shakes her head and bounces away
 >"Only I have a sensitive enough sense of taste!"
 >Honey Heart picks the glass back up from where The Warden left it and levitates it towards you
 >You grab the glass from the air and the magic aura around it dissipates
 >You upturn the glass and a few drops drip to the table
 >They drank all your juice...
 >Sleepy laughs
 >"Looks like you don't have to worry about drinking bad juice"
 >You join in on the laughter
 "I guess so. I'll be right back, I'm going to get another juice. I'm thinking apple this time instead"
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >CURSES!
 >Why did everyone EXCEPT Anon drink the juice!?
 >Blue Dancer had to pull a lot of strings to get that juice poisoned
 >And now all that effort was wasted
 >Anon even made you sister drink some!
 >You'd have to move on to plan B
 "Pi, Radian, you two have everything prepared?"
 >"Affirmative"
 >You nod and turn to Valve
 "How about you"
 >He nods
 "Excellent"
 >Tomorrow would be an interesting day indeed...
 
 Be Anon
 >You arrive back at the table and Sleepy quickly finishes his mouthful of food
 >"Anon, I almost forgot to mention that I finished you-"
 "THANK you, Sleepy. "
 >Sleepy raises an eyebrow at the rude interruption
 >You couldn't make it a surprise if Sleepy talked about it right now
 "sorry for interrupting. You can give it to me after dinner, deal?"
 >Sleepy nods
 >You all return to your meals
 >Sleepy lets out a loud yawn and stretch
 >Accidently rubbing a wing against Honey's back
 >That smooth bastard
 >Honey stiffens
 >"Awfully crowded in here. That's why I hate eating here"
 >Cookies tilts her head
 >"That bench is designed for up to seven ponies, you'd have more room if yo-"
 >You quickly nudge Cookies
 >She turns to look at you curiously
 >You look at the two ponies sitting across from you meaningfully
 >Cookies eyes go wide as realization hits
 >She drops the subject and finishes off her meal
 >You and Bust finish not far behind
 >Bust turns to you
 >"I'll catch you later Anon. Today was really intense, so I'm all tuckered out"
 >You nod and wave goodbye as Bust leaves
 >Swaying her hips just the tiniest bit more than is necessary, as always
 "Hey Cookies, I'll meet you at my cell for my 'bedtime story'"
 >Cookies grins broadly and gives an excited nod
 >"Sure, see you there!"
 >She trots off...
 >...was she trying to sway her hips like Bust?
 >Well, it was that or she suddenly developed a limp
 >You chuckle and turn towards Sleepy
 "So, when do I get my pillow?"
 >Sleepy looks up at you
 >He hadn't finished his food
 >Neither had Honey Heart
 >Looks like they were using their food as an excuse to enjoy each other's company
 >Damn, you need to be a good wingman here. Can't pull Sleepy away.
 >But you really want to give Cookies that pillow...
 "Actually, would you mind if I just grabbed it from your room?"
 >Sleepy shakes his head
 >"Go for it. It'll be on my workbench"
 "Thanks bud, enjoy the rest of dinner"
 >Sleepy nods and smirks
 >"You know, I'd enjoy it more if I could have something to sweeten my food.  I could really use some honey"
 >Honey nearly chokes on her milk
 >Sleepy, you smooth bastard
 >...wait a minute!
 > food/girlfriend jokes were your thing!
 >You chuckle
 >Looks like you've rubbed off on him
 "Seeya Sleepy, have a good night nurse Heart"
 >Honey Heart quickly nods and you start heading for Sleepy's cell
 >quietly laughing to yourself all the while
 >You eventually reach his cell and find the pillow exactly where he said you would
 >You start to pick it up, and gasp as your hand grasps it
 >you couldn't tell where your hand ended and the pillow began
 >Your hand felt... numb isn't the right word
 >It felt as though your hand had simply stopped existing, all sensation was wiped from the extremity
 >It was a pleasant kind of void
 >As though it were a promise that you'd never feel discomfort there ever again
 >You release the pillow, and sensation immediately returns to your hand
 >It's like the tactile version of the sun getting in your eyes first thing in the morning
 >Damn, Sleepy wasn't kidding when he said his pillows were potent
 >Time to test if it really can block out sound
 >You pick up the pillow and wrap it around your head
 >Your head feels as though it is being cradled by a goddess
 >You can't hear anything going on beyond the beautiful cushion
 >All you can hear is the steady rush of blood in your ears, while your heart beats a soothing rhythm
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >Best damn investment you've ever made
 >You hurry towards your cell
 >You had one hell of a present to deliver to a very lucky mare
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be pacing back and forth
 >You had been struggling to maintain your composure all through dinner
 >Especially about halfway through
 >Probably just because that kiss before dinner was amazing~
 >You really needed some loving
 >Your skin felt tight
 >You felt discomfort down to your bones...
 >Discomfort that only Anon's wonderful hands could work away
 >Speaking of whom, you catch sight of Anon as he rounds the bend in the hall and rushes towards you
 >YAY!
 >Wait
 >What is that he's carrying?
 >Is that a pillow?
 >whatever, it isn't important
 >Because it isn't pillow time
 >It isn't dinner time
 >It isn't adventure time
 >it's CUDDLE TIME!
 >"Hey, let me get the door for you"
 >What a gentlestallion~
 >You quickly enter the room and Anon follows, closing and locking the door behind himself
 >You hop up on the bed and Anon follows right behind
 >"Hey, before we start. you've done such a great job of dealing with me and my silliness that I decided to get you a present"
 >Huh?
 >Anon got you a present?
 >Where could he get a present from?
 >The arcade maybe?
 "Are you hiding it behind the pillow?"
 >Anon frowns
 >"No, it IS the pillow"
 >Wow...disappointing...
 >Well, he doesn't have the opportunity to just go out shopping...
 >You'll just have to pretend to be excited for him
 "Wow... this means a lot to me, just fantastic"
 >NAILED IT
 >Anon scrunchies
 >You'll never get tired of that face
 >You just wish he didn't make it when he was annoyed
 >"Believe me, it isn't just any pillow. It really is something worth getting excited about"
 >He lays the pillow on the bed behind you
 >"Here, try laying down on it
 >You smile sheepishly at him and do as you are tol-
 >...
 >...
 >...
 >oh sweet Celestia was that soft
 >This must be like what master masseuse unicorns could do
 >The kind of unicorns that only royalty could afford to meet with
 >You try to thank Anon properly with a hug, but you can't manage the willpower to lift yourself from this little slice of perfection
 >Anon'll just have to settle for a verbal thanks
 "Mhmmglrglrbd"
 >Anon laughs
 >"I guess you like it!"
 >You barely manage to give Anon a crooked grin
 >Anon laughs again
 >Such a rich sound~
 >You could barely think straight
 >The whole world is beauty
 >The whole world, except wherever the Bronze siblings are...
 >No use, you can't feel upset while lying on such a powerful tool of comfort
 >"Well, I guess it's time for the main course..."
 >Anon leans in close and begins to stroke your belly with one hand, the other gently scratching your chest
 >Anon leans down close and presses his cheek to yours
 >You manage a weak giggle
 >You breath catches in your throat as he begins to carefully nibble an ear
 >THIS WAS HEAVEN
 
 Be Anon
 >Be with a VERY happy mare
 >Cookies had the biggest, most lopsided grin you'd ever seen
 >If she was any more relaxed, she'd be a liquid
 >You lean down, to touch your cheek to hers
 >She giggles cutely in response
 >Time to see if she liked having her ears nibbled...
 >You gingerly take the cartilage between your teeth and press down slightly
 >She tenses up
 >But with the soothing effect of the pillow, she was still more relaxed than you'd ever seen her
 >Her hooves lazily flail against your chest and side and she lets out a cute little sound
 >You smile, still gently chewing her ear
 >Time to see what you could really do with this pillow as backup!
 >You press down harder with your hands and, with small circular motions, set them in opposite directions up and down her belly and chest
 >About all she could manage was the occasional weak gurgle or sigh as you worked your hands across her body
 >Hrm... you are doing an excellent job, but you can't help but feel like you could do better
 >You switch tactics, kneading her coat
 >Your fingernails scratch lightly at the skin underneath
 >She lets out a moan and her hind leg twitches involuntarily
 >You release her ear and move your face to hers
 >You press your nose against hers and she giggles in your face
 >You chuckle back and press your forehead against hers as well
 >In this position, your breath leaves your body only to be caught by Cookies' inhalation
 >And vice versa
 >You lie like that for several long, decadent minutes before tilting your head the other direction using your nose as a fulcrum
 >It barely qualifies as a kiss as you smile against eachother
 >You decide it's time for the pseudo-kiss to graduate, and press forward
 >She manages to return the gesture despite her relaxation-addled state
 >You pull back and mush your face against the side of her neck
 >She lets out a little hum of happiness
 >With what appears to be a herculean effort, she squeezes you with all her legs for a full body hug
 >Her hum reaches a higher pitch as she squeezes you
 >you both laugh for no other reason than that you are happy
 >As the laughter dies down, you let the pressure off of your elbows and lower yourself more on top of her
 >She gives a low sound of approval as the pressure on her body increases
 >You raise a hand up and lightly trace the base of her ears
 >She mewls indignantly at the teasing touch
 >You comply to her wordless complaints and start massaging her ears properly
 >She closes her eyes and tries to arch her back to better press her head against your hand
 >You increase the tempo and roughness of the massaging and she bites her lip
 >You shift weight and move your other hand down to stroke her flank and side
 >Your hand presses tightly against her, and your fingers sink into the perfectly toned musculature there
 >Guardpones need to be in good shape
 >"-on~"
 >She barely manages a squeak
 >You chuckle
 "what was that?"
 >She scrunchies hard and tries again to form the word
 >"Spo~"
 >She gives up and just gives you a plaintive look
 "Were you trying to say you wanted to spoon?"
 >She smiles and nods
 >All the confirmation you need
 >You give her a toothy grin
 "You want to be the little spoon, or the jetpack?"
 >You prepare a little ambush for when she attempts to answer...
 >She takes a deep, shaky breath
 >Her voice is husky
 >"I want to be lit-"
 >You spring your trap
 >You tweak an ear just gently enough to keep it pleasurable with your first hand, and rake your fingers down her side with the other
 >"-tlurghmrbfnm"
 >She scrunchies again
 >She is clearly torn about whether to be annoyed at the distraction, or to simply enjoy the sensations
 >You lean down again and give her a deep kiss
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >When you resurface, her face couldn't be more red
 >You smirk
 "What's the matter, human got your tongue?"
 >Looks like you were wrong, her face could be more red
 >You chuckle and carefully extract yourself from above her
 >You firmly roll her to her side, facing away from you and assume the position of big spoon
 >Cookies lets out a deep, shaky yet satisfied sigh
 >You reach over and set your alarm for three hours
 >That should give Cookies enough time to nap with you for a while but still have time to leave the prison at an appropriate time
 >You slump back down next to Cookies
 >"....you~"
 "Huh? What was that?"
 >Your only answer is a light snore
 >Cookies was already sleeping
 >You chuckle in response
 "Love you too"
 >She lets out a happy sound and snuggles in closer
 >She was literally so good at being adorable, she could do it in her sleep
 >You wrap your free arm around her
 >You also manage to rest your head on a free corner of the super-pillow
 >Score!
 
 Be The Warden
 >Tonight you decided to treat yourself to something special!
 >You were going to sleep in your office!
 >You snuggle into your sleeping bag and hug a pillow
 >You always had good dreams when you slept in your office!
 >You were super excited to fall asleep!
 >You'd be asleep any minute now!
 >You couldn't wait fo-
 "zzz"
 
 Be Anon
 >Be waking up
 >Damn this pillow was amazing
 >Cookies had told you to keep it in your cell, since it would be hard for her to smuggle it in and out of the prison
 >That, and she said it could only be better if it smelled like you
 >You snuggle in against the pillow and yawn
 >Breakfast was still a long way off, you had plenty of time to sleep in
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be in your home
 >Be waking up feeling extremely refreshed
 >you'd thought going to sleep would be difficult after your nap with Anon, but you fell right asleep when you got to your own bed
 >You stretch and yawn, and hop out of bed
 >You stumble a bit
 >That's odd...
 >Your body feels... larger than normal
 >huh, you are probably just feeling groggy
 >You trot towards your bathroom to prepare for the day
 >Smiling the whole way
 >When you reach the bathroom, you glance in the mirror
 >You double take
 >...That isn't right
 >THAT ISN'T RIGHT AT ALL
 >How would anypony recognize you like this?!
 >How would your family react?!
 >!
 >HOW WOULD ANON REACT?!
 >He couldn't see you like this!
 >But... you can't call in sick
 >You aren't sick
 >Just...different
 >you'll have to go in and explain the situation to The Warden
 >Surely she'll give you the day off until you are back to normal?
 
 
 Be Sleepy
 >Be waking up!
 >This isn't right!
 >It appears you aren't in your own bed!
 >You are in a sleeping bag!
 >In The Warden's office!
 >WITH ALL THE ENERGY!
 >And you feel a lot colder than normal!
 >You hurry out of the bag and try to stretch!
 >You do your normal stretching routine, starting at your legs and ending at your wings!
 >wait... WHERE ARE YOUR WINGS?!
 
 Be The Warden
 "zzzzzZZZzzzz"
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Be waking up
 >You yawn and try to slide out of bed
 >Only to fall unceremoniously on the floor in a heap of tiny limbs
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >Why is everything so big?
 >You hurry to the bathroom to check yourself in the mirror
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >Upon seeing yourself, your let out an exasperated sigh and rub your temples
 >...it's too early for this
 
 Be Anon again
 >Be woken up by screaming
 >You bolt out of bed
 >That sounds like....Bust?
 >You rush out of your cell towards the sound
 >You see inmates running around in a panic, their screams and shouts mingling with Bust's
 >You round the corner to the hall where Bust's cell is
 >A guardpone nervously trots in place outside the cell
 >"Inmate, is everything alright in the-"
 >He's cut off by another bloodcurdling scream
 >He jumps and runs away, scared out of his little pone mind
 >Looks like you'll have to play hero
 "Bust? I'm coming inside! Stay calm, help is on the way!"
 >"Don't come in! I can't let you see me like this!"
 "But don't you need help?"
 >"Just get the nurse here! Please!"
 "Sure, just stay calm!"
 >"Please hurry!"
 >You rush to Honey Heart's office
 >Only to find it empty
 >A guardpony notices you and the worried look on your face
 >"The nurse isn't in yet. What's wrong?"
 "Inmate Bronze Bust. Something is wrong with her! We need the nurse"
 >From behind you, you hear Honey's voice
 >Slightly higher pitched than normal
 >"I'm here, though I may not be in the best condition to help anypony"
 >You turn to face her and-
 >...
 >welp, that's a thing
 >Looking up at you is a little filly with the same amber coat and red mane as Honey Heart
 >Same cutie mark
 >"Yes, yes, I know. I'll fix this later. What's wrong?"
 >You blink the surprised expression from your face
 "Something is wrong with Bust, she's been screaming in her room. She hasn't let anyone in"
 >Honey nods
 >"Let's go"
 >You both rush towards Busts room
 >Honey Heart has a hard time keeping up
 >This was serious, time was of the essence
 >You bend down and scoop up Honey
 >"-eep! Why you, PUT ME DOWN!"
 >She flails her tiny legs futilely in the air
 "We'll get there faster if I carry you. We might not have the time to spare for you to get there on your own!"
 >Filly Heart scrunchies and lets out an angry sigh
 >You make it to Bust's cell in no time
 "Bust, I'm back and I've brought Honey Heart!"
 >Honey rushes into the cell
 >...
 >You hear bust shout out angrily
 >"ANON! This isn't funny, get me the real Honey Heart!"
 >You hear an equally angry shout
 >"I AM HONEY HEART!"
 >You hear the telltale sound of The Warden's hoofsteps behind you and turn
 >"Hi Anon, what's going on?!"
 >THAT WASN'T THE WARDEN'S VOICE
 >THAT WASN'T THE WARDEN'S VOICE AT ALL
 "S-Sleepy?"
 >The Warden nods
 >...Or rather, Sleepy in The Warden's body nods
 >"It would appear that I'm in The Warden's body now! I've never felt so energetic! I don't know how to deal with this!"
 >Today officially just got weird
 
 Be Honey Heart
 "I AM HONEY HEART!"
 >Bust stares at you, eyes wide
 >She's hiding her body behind her bathroom door
 "Whatever is affecting you is probably affecting me too"
 >Bust nods and bites her lip
 "Now tell me, what's wrong?"
 >Bust self-conciously steps out from behind the door
 >...
 >Ah
 >So that's the issue here
 >Bust's most prominent features had, for lack of a better term, vanished
 >"...Can you fix me Honey? I don't want anypony to see me like this, especially not Anon"
 >You bite your lip and furrow your brow in thought
 "I'm not sure. I don't know what is causing this, or what the cure might be"
 >Bust lets out a small whimper
 >This is going to be a long day
 
 Be Anon
 >It is almost time for breakfast, Cookies would be coming for you soon
 >...
 >COOKIES!
 >What if something like this was affecting her too?!
 >This is bad, you've got to find her!
 >And since Sleepy is in The Warden's body, does that mean...?
 "Sleepy, Honey Heart is in there with Bust. Let them know I went to check on Cookies and The Warden"
 >Sleepy nods vigorously while hopping in place
 >His eyes widen
 >"I CAN'T STOP NODDING!"
 >You help Sleepy stop nodding by physically holding his head in place
 >"Thanks Anon!"
 >you nod and quickly leave the area
 >You needed to find Cookies
 >Better start in The Warden's office, guard postings would be there
 >You enter the office without knocking
 >The Warden's body was in front of Bust's room, after all
 >You search the desk and find the guard schedule
 >Time to see where Cookies is...
 >...
 >She had the morning off until breakfast
 >The door to the office opens as someone bursts in
 >"I'm sorry ma'am, I can't work today, something has come up"
 >That...almost sounded like Cookies?
 >You look up as the pony realizes their mistake
 >"A-Anon! I....I can explain..."
 >Looks like Cookies was affected by whatever has messed with all your other friends
 >Unless Cookies has an older brother
 >With the same cutie mark
 >Wait, Cookies said she could explain!
 >Or should you consider Cookies a 'he' for now?
 "Please do, things are crazy here"
 >Cookies bites his lip and his eyes shift rapidly around the room, looking for a way out
 >"Alright, I can't explain. What do you mean things are crazy here?"
 "Whatever...changed you also changed Sleepy, Honey Heart, Bust, and potentially The Warden. I came here to see where you were posted because I was worried that it had affected you too"
 >Cookies looks down at his hooves
 >"Well, it did affect me... Anon... What happens if I can't change back?"
 >Cookies looks back up with tears in his eyes
 >You quickly step over to him and wrap him in a hug
 "We will get through this together. Please don't cry, I've seen more than enough of you crying for one lifetime"
 >Cookies sniffles and nods his head
 >"O-ok Anon. But what do we do right now?"
 >That is a good question
 >Where to now?
 >...You should check on Sleepy's body, make sure The Warden doesn't get it into any trouble
 "Let's go to Sleepy's cell, he potentially swapped bodies with The Warden"
 >You lead the way, but have to stop occasionally to wait for Cookies to catch up
 >She's slower than usual in the unfamiliar body
 >You finally arrive at Sleepy's cell and open the door
 >Good thing he didn't lock it
 >You find Sleepy's body on the bed
 >"ZZZZzzzzZZz"
 "Good, Sleepy's body is still here"
 >Cookies nods
 >"Let's wake him up...wake her up?"
 "We should probably just refer to them as their personalities, not the bodies"
 >Cookies nods again
 >"Good idea"
 >You walk over to The Warden in Sleepy's body
 "Good morning, time to wake up"
 >you gently shake The Warden
 >She just keeps snoring
 >You shake more urgently
 >...
 >no reaction
 "huh, she isn't waking up"
 >Cookies gives you a worried look
 "Well, let's try this then..."
 >You grab the alarm clock and set the alarm for ten seconds
 >Then you set the clock on top of The Warden
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >Five seconds left
 >Cookies covers his ears with his hooves
 >You plug your ears
 >Three
 >Two
 >One...
 >The alarm goes off with the auditory fury of a thousand crying toddlers
 >The Warden extends a wing and ends up holding the wailing alarm like a teddy bear
 >"Snrkt"
 >Well, at least you got a different type of snore out of her
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Looks like Bust's deflated balloons were the only adverse effect she was experiencing
 "Good news is: Your chest appears to be the only thing affected"
 >Bust slowly claps
 >"I'm astounded by your powers of deduction and observation. Where did you learn medicine, a coloring book?!"
 >You frown at her
 "Rudeness won't solve anything. Now please come with me to my office. I can't do any tests without my equipment"
 >Bust gives you a panicked look
 >"But what if someone sees me? What if Anon sees me?! I can't leave until I get 'the girls' back!"
 >You can't help but bring your hoof to your face
 "It's either walk with me to my office, or risk not getting them back at all"
 >Bust bites a lip, clearly torn between the decisions
 >She lights up
 >"Wait, I've got an idea! Get me some balloons"
 >Clearly she won't leave without stuffing her bra so she can look like her normal self
 >You sigh
 "Fine, give me a minute and I'll find something for you"
 >Bust smiles gratefully
 >"Thanks, you're a good kid"
 "Don't remind me"
 
 Be Anon
 >"We can't just leave her like this!"
 "I know, I know, but how are we supposed to wake her up?"
 >Cookies frowns
 >"Isn't this Sleepy's body? maybe he knows how to wake her up"
 "Good thinking! If we weren't in a rush, I'd kiss you"
 >No homo
 >Cookies blushes and smiles
 >...
 >Maybe a little homo
 "I'll take her to Honey Heart's office, you get the others and I'll meet you there"
 >Cookies nods and hurries out the door
 >You turn back to the sleeping pony
 >Time to lift some feathers
 >You maneuver the ponies body so that you are carrying her on your back
 >The irony of a pony riding a human is not lost on you as you make your way to Honey's office
 >As you come to an intersection, you are stopped
 >By Bronze Chain
 >"Anon, been a while since our last fight. I say it's about time for a rematch"
 >You sigh
 "Give me a break, I'm kind of in a rush here. Emergency situation and all that"
 >Chain shakes his head and snaps his fingers
 >"I'm afraid I can't let you go that easily, Anon"
 >Five ponies with various brass instruments appear from the side halls
 >Chain grins
 >"Yo momma so fat, this is her theme music!"
 >Chain signals the ponies to start playing
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRq9qzuaz8s
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >AW HELL NAW
 "Yo momma so ugly, her face is used as a template for nightmare night cookies!"
 >Your insult is lost in the band's music
 >Chain dances around, making mocking gestures at you
 >You grit your teeth
 >It's hard to think with a sleeping, drooling pony on your back
 >You don't have time for this anyway
 >You shoulder past Chain and hurry down the hall
 >As the band's music fades out, you can hear his mocking laughter at your back
 >This wasn't over
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >This was turning out splendidly!
 >For the first time, you beat Anon!
 >He couldn't fight back!
 >YOU WON ONCE!
 >And the way that coward ran away with his tail between his legs...
 >Or he would have, if he had a tail
 >You felt good
 >Real good
 >You just needed to get Bust away from him to administer the antidote
 >She would be fine until you got around to it
 >You were doing all of this for her, after all
 >You had no idea that 'poison joke' could be so potent!
 >You wave your hand to disperse the band
 >Time to check on the nerds, see if they were ready for their turn as backup
 >You head to their workshop, feeling giddy
 >This plan was working out so well!
 >You enter the shop to the sounds of tinkering
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CYHsfOVWmV8&index=23&list=PLWdBPQ-SVXCQfqJ_FSKN_2gRsZORUEzZz
 >You approach the center of the workshop, where Pi and Radian are putting the finishing touches on a machine
 "You two ready?"
 >They look up and nod at you in unison
 >"We're ready when you are"
 >You grin
 "Good, it seems Anon will be in the nurses office. Let's set the ambush just outside the room"
 >Pi nods
 >"Sure, meet you there. One of our lads will get the device in place"
 "Excellent"
 >After this one, you'd get the weightlifter's help
 >You probably wouldn't even need the grand finale
 
 Be Anon
 >Chain's little 'show' slowed you down
 >You arrive at the office behind Cookies and the rest
 "I'm here, and I've brought The Warden"
 >With everyone who was affected, hopefully, all in one place you could take stock
 >Looks like The Warden and Sleepy swapped bodies
 >Cookies became the R63 version of herself...himself...whatever
 >Nurse Honey Heart became a child
 >And Bust...
 >Bust is desperately trying to hide behind Honey's desk
 "Bust, how are you affected?"
 >Bust jumps a little as you focus on her
 >"Uh... I wasn't! I'm just here to support all of you. Gotta take care of my friends"
 "Then why are you hiding behind the desk?"
 >Bust bites her lip
 >"um...Looking for something I dropped?"
 >You don't buy it for a second
 >But that can wait
 >First you need to try and figure out what is going on
 "Nurse Heart, any idea what is causing this?"
 >Honey shakes her head
 >"I've taken urine and saliva samples, but I can't analyze them very quickly. It will be at least an hour before the earliest results come in"
 >That's pretty good return time, all things considered
 >You still wish you knew now though
 >Cookies takes a step forward
 >"It's almost breakfast. We can eat while we wait"
 "What about The Warden? We can't wake her up. Sleepy, think you can wake her?"
 >Sleepy shakes his head
 >He hasn't stopped hopping in place since you first saw him earlier in the day
 >"I always woke up through sheer willpower. If she can't wake herself up then she is stuck asleep until she starves!"
 >Well...
 >...Shit
 >Honey clears her tiny, tiny throat
 >"Why don't you leave The Warden here? Put her on the examination table. I need to stay here to finish the tests anyway, I'll watch over her"
 >You nod and set The Warden down on the table
 >"Since she's in MY body, I'll stick around too!"
 >You nod at Sleepy
 "Alright... I guess I'll just go to breakfast. Who is coming with me?"
 >Cookies steps over to you
 >"I may be... like this. But I'm still your chaperone, responsible for watching you during meals"
 >Bust cautiously steps out from behind the desk
 >She's wearing a shirt that completely covers her cleavage
 >You didn't know she owned a shirt like that
 >"I'll go too. I could use something to eat"
 >You nod
 "Let's get out of nurse Heart's hair. Seeya later nurse Heart, Sleepy"
 >You start walking out of the office but stop as soon as you have the door fully opened
 >There is a large machine with a L.E.D. lights pointed towards you
 >The machine hums to life
 >It clicks and clinks, rumbles and grinds
 >Chain's voice comes from a speaker hidden somewhere on the device
 >"Hey there Anon. I hope you 'enjoy' this YO MOMMAGRAM!"
 >With that, the L.E.D. lights begin to display a message
 >The words slowly scroll past
 >YO
 >MOMMA
 >SO
 >DUMB
 >SHE
 >THINKS
 >SQUARE
 >ROOTS
 >ARE
 >EDIBLE
 >The machine displays the message several times
 >All with different colors
 >Bust covers her mouth with her hand
 >"I-I'm so sorry Anon"
 >You rub your hand against your face as the speaker comes back to life
 >Crackling out Chain's laughter
 >You sigh
 "Come on girls, nothing we can do here"
 >They both nod and follow you towards the cafeteria
 >It may just be your imagination, but you keep hearing the sound of balloons rubbing together
 >Maybe you are just going insane
 >That would be the most logical explanation for what is going on today
 >Your group turns the corner to find Chain standing there with a large group of gigantic ponies
 >"Hey Anon, did you enjoy my little present?"
 >You are not in the mood for this
 >Cookies hides her face and Bust looks worriedly between the two of you
 "Just step aside Chain. I'm not in the mood today"
 >Chain grins mischievously
 >"Good. Hey Anon, YO MOMMA SO FAT..."
 >The muscled ponies behind him flex
 >"...NOT EVEN WE COULD LIFT HER"
 >...
 >Damn, that was good
 >You owe him three now
 >You glare at him
 "Fine, I'll play a little. Yo momma so fat, when a changeling tried to feed off her it got type two diabetes! Yo momma so dumb, she tried to drown a fish! And lastly, Yo momma so ugly that Nightmare Moon gives her candy as tribute on Nightmare Night!"
 >Bust steps forward
 >"Please stop this fighting! Plea-"
 >She trips, as though she was compensating for weight that just wasn't there
 >She lands on her chest
 >Hard
 >Two loud pops are heard in rapid succession
 "Bust, you alright!?"
 >She quickly sits up, unhurt
 >But her chest is flat
 >Flatter than a salt flat
 >And salt flats are really flat
 >Flat is in their name, after all
 >Bust looks at you, then down at her chest
 >And starts to cry
 >Chain screams at you
 >"LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE! YOU MADE MY SISTER CRY!"
 "I didn't do anything! Besides, isn't it more important to help her than blame me?!"
 >Chain sneers at you
 >"Just you wait, I'll get you for this! Come on Bust, we're leaving"
 >She doesn't respond, just quietly crying between you and Chain
 >Chain glares at you, then hurries away
 >His posse of bodybuilders following right behind
 >You sigh and step over and kneel down next to Bust
 "Hey, don't cry. Nothing to cry about. You're fine"
 >Cookies steps over
 >"Yea, I mean I turned into a stallion and I'm not crying. You shouldn't either"
 >Bust looks at the two of you
 >"The one time I try and do something right and stop a fight I end screw up and make a foal of myself"
 >You put a hand on her shoulder and she gasps at the touch
 >Cookies eyes you both warily
 "You didn't screw up. You did get us to stop fighting"
 >She sniffles
 >"I've never been so humiliated in my life..."
 >You stand up and offer a hand up
 "Come on, you'll feel better after you get some food in you. It was a brave thing to step between me and Chain, I don't think any less of you for it"
 >Her waterworks stop and she accepts your help to stand up
 >You quickly retract your hand once she is vertical
 "Come on, we still have plenty of time before we'll even know what caused this. Let's go eat"
 >Cookies and Bust nod and you all make your way to the mess
 >This time without interruptions
 
 
 Be Bronze Chain
 >Be with Nice Sweater and Letter Lover
 >That Anon made your sister cry!
 >That was the last straw
 >You were going to pull out all the stops
 >Time for the Grand finale!
 "Sweater, Letter, gather everypony to the mess. Let them know it's time for the grand finale"
 >You feel a tap at your side
 >"You sure boss? Doesn't it seem like too much?"
 >"He's right bosserino, you've already won haven't you?"
 >You shake your head firmly
 "I said it's time for the grand finale"
 >They gulp and nod
 >"O-Okily dokily"
 >They speed off in opposite directions to gather your allies
 >You gain a feral smile
 >Today would be a day long remembered
 
 Be Anon
 >Be eating breakfast with Cookies and Bust
 >Be about halfway through your meal
 >There has been almost no discussion since you sat down to eat
 >The mess was mostly empty
 >The other inmates had finished eating a little while ago while you were dealing with... everything
 >You hear a commotion and look over to see Chain approaching your table with a large group of ponies
 >You were NOT in the mood for this right now
 "Chain, stop right there. Turn around. And walk away."
 >He smirks
 >"Or else what? I want you to meet somepony"
 >He gestures towards a short, chubby stallion
 >"This is Chubby Cuddler"
 >The short pony waves at you
 >"Hello"
 "Uh...Hi?"
 >Chain grins
 >" We would like to sing a song about your mother. Hit it!"
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2a31vY8YNTg
 >The band picks up into a...
 >Polka?
 >Really?
 >Chain starts singing
 >"Here's a silly ditty, you can sing it right away-"
 >Alright, this is weird
 >"Now here is what you say, so sing it while you may"
 >His grin grows larger with each passing line
 >"You can sing it night or noon. Here's the words (that's all you need cause I just sang the tune) oh-"
 >aw hell naw
 >AW HELL NAW
 >You glare at Chain as he sings loud and proud
 >Inmates begin bobbing in time with the music
 >Chubby is really getting into it too
 >Chain dances around you, grinning like an idiot
 >"I get dizzy,I get numbo, when I'm dancing with my jum-jum-jumbo!"
 >As he slips into the chorus, various inmates begin to join in
 >A pony holds up a picture of a chicken
 >"Does she fit in your coop?"
 >The song continues in full swing, gaining momentum as more and more inmates join in on the fun tune
 >Finally Chubby joins in, singing loudly
 >"But she's just right for me!"
 >OH COME ON
 >You give the little stallion a disapproving look
 >He doesn't notice and continues singing
 >The entire mess is singing now
 >Except for you, Bust, and Cookies
 >Cookies glares at Chain, while Bust gives him a pleading look to stop
 >He either doesn't care, or doesn't notice and continues the song
 >If it wasn't all directed at mocking your mother, you would be impressed
 >Some of the ponies are even doing interpretive dance for the song
 >They reach the instrumental portion and ponies begin laughing
 >With a pony occasionally yelling out something along the lines of
 >"She's just too fat!"
 >The instrumental ends and Chain lets his booming singing voice carry across the mess again
 >Chain booms out the final lines, smirking at you the entire time
 >"She's too fat, much too fat, she's too fat for me, HEY!"
 >The mess explodes into applause and thundering hooves
 >The little equines really enjoyed the show
 >You clap slowly, eyebrow raised
 "Yes, yes, very nice. Are you quite finished? I'd like to eat in peace now"
 >Chain laughs at you, a small sheen of perspiration showing through his coat
 >He really worked hard on that number
 >"How do you like THAT? I've beaten you!"
 >You shrug
 "Whatever you say. Now please go away, I'd appreciate some peace and quiet"
 >The ponies around the mess start going about their own business again
 >Chain leans down
 >"Not until I hear you admit defeat"
 >Cookies stands up
 >"Inmate, that is enough! Go away."
 >Chain turns to Cookies
 >"Who the hay are you?..."
 >Realization dawns on his face
 >"You're that guard Cookies n Cream aren't you?"
 >He starts laughing
 >"What happened to your face?!"
 >Cookies glares at him
 >Chain keeps laughing
 >"You might have been an ugly looking mare, but at least you make a decent looking colt!"
 >AW HELL NAW
 >Chain can make fun of you
 >mock your mother even
 >But if he thinks he can get away with insulting your girlfriend...
 >Your boyfriend?
 >Whatever
 >If he thinks he can get away with that he's got another thing coming!
 >He'd pushed you too far already
 >And now he crossed a line
 >He dun goofed!
 >While he is distracted mocking Cookies you get up and sneak around behind him
 >You stick your index finger deep into your mouth
 >Carefully scooping up as much saliva as possible
 >You soundlessly approach your prey...
 >and strike!
 "WET WILLY!"
 >"AAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH"
 >Chain whirls around to face you
 >Anger, fear, and disgust clear on his face
 >He pushes you back
 >Your body seems to move of its own accord
 >You step forward again until your chest is touching his
 >You loop your right leg behind his legs
 >And then you push
 >The minotaur is too surprised to cry out as he falls
 >He lands hard on his back, banging his head against the floor
 >He looks up at you in fear and pain
 >"I-I'm sorry..."
 >Well, you didn't mean to go that far
 >It just kind of happened...
 >...but you better roll with it
 >If you back down now, he'll just keep attacking you
 "I don't want to hear it. Get out of my sight"
 >Chain scrambles away, tears in his eyes
 >You sit back down and quietly resume eating
 >The mess is dead quiet
 >Cookies is the first to react
 >"INMATE ANONYMOUS!"
 >You knew that this was coming
 >You look over to Cookies, who is furious
 >"Why would you ever hurt somepony like that?!"
 "He was hurting someone I cared about"
 >That deflated her anger a bit
 >You'd still be punished though
 >That much you knew for certain
 >There were too many witnesses for you to get away with it
 >"Inmate Anonymous, I'm afraid I'm going to have to punish you. With The Warden....indisposed, it falls to the nearest active guard to sentence you. As that guard, I must condemn you to corporal punishment"
 >Corporal punishment?
 >Back home, that meant death row!
 "What kind of physical punishment are we talking here?"
 >Cookies takes a deep, shaky breath
 >"I'm sorry Anon. You need to be spanked"
 >The entire mess gasps in unison
 >Then all is silent
 >You could've heard a pin drop
 >...But really, just a spanking?
 >That didn't sound too bad
 >"Your spanking will be after you finish eating. I'm sorry"
 >You nod
 "I understand. How many smacks do I get?"
 >Cookies expression turns sad
 >"For intentionally hurting another inmate, the standard is fifteen."
 >A pony faints
 >"For not accepting his apology, not apologizing to him, and for giving him a...'wet willy' I'm going to double that standard amount"
 >Another two inmates faint
 >An inmate stands up and shouts
 >"You can't do that! That is brutality! Besides, Chain started it!"
 >Several pony voices chime up in agreement
 >The crowd is starting to turn on Cookies
 >If you didn't put a stop to this, she'd have a riot on her hooves
 "ENOUGH!"
 >The ponies quiet down
 "I accept this punishment. It is fair"
 >It was more than fair
 >Who knows what starting a fight would have cost you in a human prison
 >Besides, some people had to beg their partners for a good spanking
 >With that, you sit down again and get back to eating your meal
 >The rest of the mess remains quiet for some time, but the other inmates eventually begin talking
 >The sound level returns to normal not long after
 >Bust finally recovers from the shock of seeing her brother so helpless
 >"You took it too far!"
 "I know"
 >"You made him cry!"
 "I know"
 >"You shouldn't-"
 >You lose patience
 "I KNOW! Look, I'm sorry I hurt your brother that badly. I tried to tell him to back off and he wouldn't. I'm already getting punished later. We already have enough to worry about today without fighting each other."
 >You take a sip from your juice
 >Speaking of worries, what happened to cause all the chaos with your friends?
 >If you could find the cause, Honey Heart could start working on a cure
 >You take another sip
 >And why wasn't anyone else affected? Only the people you normally sit with at meals
 >and The Warden
 >You take a sip
 >...Wait
 >The bad juice
 >They all had some, and now they were all affected!
 >But spoiled juice shoul-
 >Poison?
 >Chain
 >He must have poisoned the juice hoping to do...something to you
 "I think I know where we can learn what's affecting you guys"
 >Cookies looks over in surprise
 >"Really?"
 >You nod
 "I'm guessing Chain poisoned my juice last night. Everyone who drank from it changed"
 >You turn to Bust
 "Talk to your brother and find out what he put in that drink. Please"
 >Bust nods
 >"Fine, but only if you promise to apologize to him. And I mean a real apology"
 >You sigh and nod
 "Sure, just please get this taken care of"
 >Bust nods and leaves
 >Today just wasn't your day
 
 
 
 Be Chain
 >Be in your cell
 >Nursing your injuries
 >Anon was a monster
 >He was absolutely brutal
 >Unstoppable
 >Anon's reluctance to fight wasn't him losing...
 >Anon had been warning you
 >Warning you that you had put too much pressure on him
 >You shiver
 >Nothing and no one could stand against him
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >Maybe...
 >...Maybe he was strong enough to protect your sister better than you could?
 >After all, you had been failed to defend her against him...
 >You sigh, tears in your eyes
 >You had nothing left to try, no more tricks up your sleeve
 >It was truly over
 >You had to admit defeat
 >Anon won...
 >...
 >You are shaken from your thoughts by a gentle knocking at your door
 "Who is it? I'm not in the mood to see anyone!"
 >"Brother? Are you alright? Can I please come in?"
 >It was Bust
 >You don't know if you can face her...
 >You failed your duty as an older brother, after all
 >You take a deep, shaky breath
 >You had to have this conversation sooner or later...
 "Enter"
 >Bust quietly enters the room and sits next to you
 >"Hey there bro... How are you doing?"
 >You shrug
 "Anon didn't do any lasting damage, my pride is pretty badly bruised though"
 >Bust gives you an apologetic smile
 >"I'm glad you aren't hurt..."
 >You can't look her in the eye
 "It wouldn't matter either way. Anon has beaten me"
 >You feel Bust press her side against yours, staring at the same spot on the floor you are
 >"I'm sorry, this was all my fault. If I wasn't attracted to Anon then he would be happier and you wouldn't have been hurt. Things would be better if I just wasn't around"
 >You hear a near-silent sob
 >You look over in surprise
 >Bust had rarely cried, even when you were both little
 "Bust, you are my sister. Family sticks together no matter what. You've made my life better just by being there for me. Don't ever think I'd be better off without you"
 >Bust sniffles and smiles at you
 >"Thanks..."
 "And Anon obviously wants you around, otherwise he wouldn't fight for you like he has... He can protect you better than I can, let him know you two have my blessing"
 >You can barely choke the words out
 >Bust starts tearing up again, shaking her head
 >"He has a marefriend, he doesn't care about me at all"
 >You blink in surprise
 "Then why has he been fighting with me?!"
 >Bust smiles weakly at you
 >"I don't know... maybe he likes the challenge? Maybe he just has something against minotaurs"
 >Bust lets out a mix between a giggle and a sob
 >"He even thinks you poisoned me and all his friends! But I know you'd never go that far"
 >You gulp and stare back at the floor
 >"...Wait...You didn't!"
 >You nod guiltily
 "I couldn't bear the thought of Anon beating me. I had to try /something/ to get the upper hand. I only have one dose of antidote, so you should take it.  I was going to let Anon have it once he admitted defeat... I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to get caught up in this."
 >Bust shakes her head
 >"I'll take it with me, but I won't use it. The nurse can use it to hopefully make more"
 >You nod
 >That makes sense
 "It's in my desk"
 >Bust rests her head against your shoulder
 >"Thanks, I can deliver it in a bit"
 >You nod
 "I think Anon does like you, at least as a friend"
 >Bust sighs
 >"Maybe by being selfless and trying to share the antidote, he'll finally notice me..."
 >You chuckle sadly
 "It's always been us against the world, hasn't it?"
 >Bust nods against your shoulder
 >Your shoulder was getting wet
 >You didn't care
 >This was one of those rare times that your sister really needed you
 >You wouldn't fail her
 
 Be Anon
 >Be done with your meal
 >Cookies had another guard bring in the necessary equipment for your punishment while you ate
 >You would be spanked in front of the other inmates
 >Public humiliation and pain
 >No wonder these diabetes-inducing equines thought it was over the top
 >Cookies is standing next to a chair with...
 >...Is that a riding crop?"
 >"Please lie down on the chair, belly down"
 >Cookies' voice is robotic
 >He's keeping a stoic face, but you know him well
 >This really will hurt him more than it will hurt you
 >You step over to the chair
 >A crowd has gathered, many inmates and even a few guards are already crying in sympathy
 >One inmate steps forward
 >"Please, show mercy! Not the Smacky-Smacky!"
 >You can't help but chuckle
 >You raise your hands and make a reassuring gesture
 "Don't worry. I'll survive this. Just let it happen and let me get it over with"
 >The inmate starts crying, falling back into the crowd
 >You lie down on the chair as Cookies instructed
 >You can't see what he is doing, but based on how silent the crowd just became...
 >Cookies is probably winding up for the-
 *SMACK*
 >SON OF A BITCH THAT STINGS
 >Yup, you are going to have a welt
 >...Only twenty nine more t-
 *SMACK*
 >...twenty eight more to go
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be doing the hardest thing you've ever had to do in your life
 >And not just because holding the Smacky-Smacky was awkward
 >You are punishing your coltfriend...
 >For standing up for you against a bully
 >You grit your teeth against the cloth handle
 >You whip your head around, bringing the hard rubber head to bear against Anon's bottom
 *SMACK*
 >He jumps slightly, but doesn't make a sound
 >Each strike feels like it is smacking your heart
 >Poor Anon...
 *SMACK*
 >He's only the second inmate to ever need to be punished this way at this prison
 >The first inmate couldn't walk for a week
 >Didn't stop crying until two weeks had passed
 >Had nightmares for three weeks
 *SMACK*
 >How could Anon ever forgive you?
 *SMACK*
 >You barely manage to hold back your tears
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Anon, Bust, and Cookies were late
 >You had found the cause of the problems
 >Poison joke
 >There were two possible ways to cure the contamination
 >Option One: Cleansing herbal bath
 >It would take at least two hours of soaking to cure everypony
 >The prison's kitchen and your own office should have the necessary herbs in stock
 >The prison's spa would have a tub big enough for everypony
 >Option Two: There was a cure in potion form
 >But that would be expensive, and it would be difficult to get enough for everypony
 >Option one it was
 >Sleepy had been putting The Warden's body to good use
 >He had always been ready to grab something off a shelf you couldn't reach, or to prepare tests for you
 >Even in an unfamiliar body, his knack for precision and measurement was astounding
 "You have some degree of skill. You could've made a good lab assistant"
 >He bounces in excitement and gives you a huge grin
 >"THANKS!"
 >You frown at him
 "Inside voices, Sleepy"
 >His expression shifts to one of frustration
 >"Sorry, I'm still trying to learn to control this body. I just keep hopping up and down!"
 "Have you tried stopping?"
 >Sleepy takes a deep breath and his bouncing subsides
 >"Huh... I guess this body is a manual transmission model"
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >Be walking into Honey's office
 "I have some antidote! We are being affected by poison joke"
 >Honey looks up in surprise
 >"You have some antidote?!"
 >You nod, holding the vial up
 >Honey frowns
 >"That isn't enough for all of us"
 >You nod sadly
 "I know... but can't you make more with this sample?"
 >Honey shakes her head
 >"No, the ingredients are rare this time of year. There is another way for us to cure ourselves though"
 "So what should I do with this dose of antidote?"
 >Honey shrugs
 >"That is only enough for one of us. We need to cure The Warden and Sleepy at the same time, meaning you, me, or Cookies should take that dose"
 >Sleepy looks over with a goofy grin
 >"I don't mind needing to wait! You know, Honey, you are just adorable as a filly!  Not that you aren't cute when you are grown!  I don't mean cute as in adorable but cute as in attrac-WHY CAN'T I STOP TALKING?!"
 >Honey Heart's face goes deadpan
 >A slight blush on her face
 >Sleepy, however, is practically glowing with embarrassment
 >...Guess you'll wait for Anon and Cookies to get here, see what they want to do with the dose
 
 Be Anon
 *SMACK*
 >Twenty eight
 >No wonder they call it a 'Smacky-Smacky'
 >Most of the ponies were covering their eyes around number four
 >Nearly all of them were crying at number seven
 *SMACK*
 >Twenty nine
 >Only one more and it'll be done
 >The whole crowd would be staring at you in awe of your toughness, if they weren't all sobbing
 >You still haven't let out a sound
 *SMACK*
 >THIRTY!
 >Cookies trots around to your front
 >His eyes are bloodshot from crying
 >"Your punishment has been completed. Are you able to stand on your own?"
 >His voice cracks
 >You look over and smile reassuringly
 "Yea, I shouldn't have any issues"
 >You extract yourself from atop the chair and gingerly rub your bottom
 >Cookies really gave it to you, didn't hold back at all
 >You smile
 >Good, now no one would ever guess the two of you were in a relationship
 "Hey Cookies, let's go see if Honey Heart has found a cure yet"
 >Cookies tilts her head at you
 >"Y-You aren't upset with me?"
 >You chuckle
 "Why would I be? I got what I deserved, didn't I?"
 >You lower your voice to a whisper, so only Cookies could hear
 "Besides, some people from my world would pay good money to be spanked like that"
 >Cookies gives you a seriously confused look, then whispers back
 >"Why would anyone ever want to be punished like that?!"
 >...
 "I'll explain when you're older"
 >Cookies scrunchies
 >Before she can respond, an inmate runs over
 >A mare with a green coat and a yellow mane clutching a bouquet of flowers
 >"We all hope you get well soon!"
 >You look over, and the crowd murmurs in agreement
 >You smile at the crowd and take the bouquet
 "Thanks everyone. I'll be just fine"
 >The crowd cheers
 >You motion for Cookies to follow and you head towards Honey's office
 
 Be Blossom Bottom
 >Be in prison for selling roses with thorns still on the stems
 >Be the pony that gave Anon get well soon flowers
 >Be watching the toughest motherbucker to ever walk the halls of this prison walk out of the mess with some of your flowers
 >Anon really was on another level compared to everypony
 
 Be Anon
 >Be in Honey's office
 >"I have good news and bad news"
 "What is the good news?
 >Honey smiles
 >"I've got everything I need to prepare a cure for everypony"
 >You smile
 "Awesome! What is the bad news?"
 >"It will take me three hours to prepare it, and another two hours to fully administer the treatment"
 >That isn't so bad
 "Sounds like pretty good timing. You can prepare the cure, we'll all eat dinner, then you can start the treatment"
 >Honey scowls
 >"It will completely eat my afternoon"
 >Bust clears her throat
 >"um, Anon? I have a faster cure, but only enough to treat one of us"
 >Only one dose?
 "That's good... too bad there isn't enough to share though... So, who gets it?"
 >Honey walks over to The Warden
 >"We need to cure Sleepy and The Warden at the same time, and I can wait. It is between Cookies and Bust"
 >Cookies looks over at Bust
 >"You should take it"
 >Both you and Bust look over in surprise
 >"Don't you want to change back too?"
 >Cookies looks down at the floor
 >"Of course I do. But I don't deserve it after what I did to Anon"
 >Bust looks confused for a moment, before realization hits her
 >Bust looks over at you with worry
 >"How was it? Are you alright?"
 >You chuckle and gently rub your sore Australia
 "I won't be sitting down much for a while, but I'm fine"
 >Bust turns to Cookies
 >"...You sure you want me to have it?"
 >Cookies nods sadly
 >...You'd have to fix that ASAP
 >Bust shrugs
 >"Alright...if you're sure"
 "Thanks for bringing the cure here. Especially since it was only a single dose"
 >Bust smiles at you and nods
 >Then she slowly pulls the cork from the vial
 >It comes off with a satisfying pop
 >She downs the liquid in a single gulp
 >Bust's eyes go wide and she licks her lips
 >"Blueberry flavored"
 >Her stomach growls loudly and her face contorts in discomfort
 >She opens her mouth, but the potion takes effect before she can get a word out
 >She is physically moved back as a familiar pair of bumps suddenly appear under her shirt
 >They come back with the same sound removing the cork from the vial produced
 >Bust closes her mouth and smiles broadly, staring down at her Grand Tetons mountain range
 >She hugs herself tightly, turning to Cookies
 >"Thank you so much! I'm so glad to have 'the girls' back!"
 >Cookies smiles weakly and nods back to her
 >You turn to Cookies
 "So, I guess we have a couple hours to burn. Where are you supposed to be posted?"
 >Cookies frowns
 >"I'm supposed to be patrolling outside"
 >He gags on the word 'outside
 >You can't blame him
 >There was a big heat wave scheduled today
 >Something about correcting for too much rain a while back
 >You grin at Cookies
 "I won't tell The Warden that you weren't outside if you won't"
 >Cookies looks at you in surprise
 >He bites his lip and looks back to The Warden, still fast asleep without any sign of waking from the comfort-induced coma
 >"...I guess it wouldn't be too bad if I skipped my shift...Besides, The Warden wouldn't want me working if I wasn't totally comfortable, right?"
 "Exactly. Shall we retire to my abode for some 'light reading'?"
 >Cookies grins mischievously
 >"Yes, lets!"
 >Looks like you've succeeded in cheering him up
 >Even as a stallion, Cookies' smile could light up a room
 
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Be at the spa, two hours and forty five minutes later
 >You had a gift for timing
 >You had estimated the prep time perfectly
 >You turn to Sleepy
 "Please bring Cookies and Anon here, let them know the treatment is ready"
 >He nods excitedly
 >"Sure! I can't wait to take this bath with you!"
 >He blanches
 >You can't help but giggle at the awkward phrasing
 >"I MEAN I CAN'T WAIT TO CHANGE BACK!"
 >You nod with a smirk
 "Sure... Shouldn't you be going?"
 >You raise an eyebrow and motion towards the cell blocks
 >He blushes and hurriedly hops out the door
 >muttering something about The Warden's body having a defective mouth filter
 >You shake your head with a smile
 >You turn towards the tub to complete the final preparations
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be galloping through the halls!
 >You /really/ hated this body!
 >Nothing worked the way it should!
 >Your mouth automatically said whatever you thought!
 >Your muscles were stuck in the 'on' position!
 >And you haven't felt relaxed or calm for even a second!
 >How can The Warden live like this?!
 >This body has so much energy, you  even think in exclamation points!
 >Despite being in CONSTANT motion, you don't feel tired in the slightest!
 >You hurry your way to Anon's cell!
 >You bang on the door rapidly with your face!
 >You hear a groan from inside!
 >You know that groan!
 >That was the groan of somepony waking up from a wonderful sleep!
 >A few minutes later, Cookies and Anon step out of the room!
 "HIYA GUYS! Honey Heart is ready to fix us!"
 >Anon smiles and makes an odd gesture!
 >"Great, let's get going then"
 >Cookies nods!
 >"It'll feel good to be back in my normal body again"
 >You nod ecstatically!
 "I can't wait to get my wings back! And I can't wait to be relaxed again! And I can't wait to see adult Honey again! I mean, she's cute as a filly and all but she looks great as an adult! And- OH MY CELESTIA WHY WON'T THIS MOUTH STOP?!"
 >Anon just starts laughing!
 >Once he calms down a little, he gives you a goofy grin!
 >"Let's get you fixed up...And by the way, Honey likes you too"
 >WAIT WHAT?!
 >HOW DID ANON LEARN YOU HAD A CRUSH ON HER?!
 >HOW DID ANON LEARN SHE HAD A CRUSH ON YOU?!
 >"HOW DO YOU KNOW?!"
 >Anon blinks at the sudden volume!
 >"She asked me about you. And it's pretty obvious you like her"
 >CURSE THIS BODY FOR GIVING AWAY YOUR SECRETS!
 >Cookies laughs and nods!
 >"Come on you two, let's hurry over to Nurse Heart and get ourselves cured"
 
 Be Anon
 >Be arriving at the spa with Cookies and Sleepy
 >Sleepy has been hopping the entire way
 >Sleepy waves at the guardpony at the reception desk as you pass
 >Sleepy leads you to a room and opens the door
 >Inside, Honey Heart is levitating various jugs and baskets around a jacuzzi
 >A Jacuzzi? Really?
 >This place really was like a resort
 >"Good, everypony is here. Come in and get into the Jacuzzi"
 >Sleepy sprints to the water and summersaults right in, splashing the tiles around the Jacuzzi
 >Honey giggles as she is splashed by a bit of the curative water
 >She levitates The Warden, who is still fast asleep, into the water
 >As soon as she hits the water, Sleepy falls asleep as well
 >Honey nods
 >"Good, looks like the cure is taking effect. They will probably be cured faster than Cookies or I will. Speaking of which, I should begin my own treatment"
 >Honey unceremoniously jumps into the water
 >Cookies removes his uniform and places it away from the Jacuzzi so that it wouldn't get wet
 >Cookies follows suit and splashes into the warm water
 >You smile and walk up to the Jacuzzi
 >Cookies wades over to you
 >"What are you waiting for? Hop in!"
 >Honey looks over
 >"The cure won't affect you in any way, but it is still a Jacuzzi"
 >You shake your head
 "I'll get my uniform wet, and I don't have a swimsuit handy"
 >Cookies gets a mischievous gleam in his eye and splashes you
 >Getting your jumpsuit soaked
 >"There, now you don't have to worry about getting wet"
 >Well then
 >Now you have no excuse
 >Oh well, that Jacuzzi does look inviting...
 >You let out a mix between chuckle and sigh before taking off your shoes
 >You can at least try to keep your footwear dry
 >You toss your shoes aside and slowly lower yourself into the warm, bubbling water
 >You let out a happy sigh as the warm water soothes and relaxes your muscles
 >You gingerly settle into a seat and Cookies moves over to you
 >Before He gets too close, you quickly push out a hand
 >Splashing  him in the face
 "That's for getting my jumpsuit wet"
 >Cookies shakes some of the water from his face and sticks out his tongue
 >Honey sighs
 >"I would have hoped you two would have worked all that out of your system earlier"
 "What do you mean?"
 >Honey rolls her eyes
 >"Come on, it's obvious you two are a couple"
 >Oh
 >Well then
 >You are doing a terrible job keeping this a secret
 "Please don't tell anyone. If The Warden found out, Cookies might lose her job!"
 >Cookies bites her lip and nods
 >Wait...
 >Cookies bit /her/ lip
 "Cookies! You're back to normal!"
 >Cookies looks down at herself in surprise
 >"That was so fast! I didn't even notice!"
 >She excitedly trots in place, turning and looking at herself all over
 >Honey laughs at the display
 >"Don't worry, I won't spill your secret. I do, however, think you two are being paranoid"
 >You shrug
 "Better safe than sorry"
 >Cookies splashes her way over to you and sits next to you and you wrap an arm around her under the waterline
 >She smiles at you and you give her a little squeeze
 >It was good to have her back in her normal body
 
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >Be with your brother
 >He had really been feeling down
 >But after you both had a good cry and spent quality sibling time, he was feeling much better
 >"Hey sis, do you know where Anon is? I'd like to really apologize. I've been a real tortoises patoot to him"
 "He's probably with the ponies who were poisoned, getting them cured"
 >Chain nods
 >"Good, I need to apologize to them too"
 >You smile at him
 >He could be overprotective, brutish, and over the top...
 >But he was still your brother
 >And he knew when he did wrong
 "Come on, they will be at the spa already"
 >He nods and gestures for you to take the lead
 >As the two of you walk the halls towards the spa, you notice a pony appear at Chain's side at tap him lightly
 >"Hey there Boss, you alright?  Anon gave you a real nasty tumble"
 >Your brother nods down at the pony
 >"Yea, I'm fine. Thanks for asking, Letter"
 >Chain looks over to you
 >"Hey sis, I'd like you to meet my friend Letter Lover. Letter, I'd like to introduce you to my sister Bronze Bust"
 >Letter nods
 >"Pleasure to meet you"
 >You smile
 >Your brother usually has such trouble making friends
 "Nice to meet you too"
 >Chain scratches the back of his neck
 >"Hey Letter, you can just call me by my name from now on"
 >Letter nods and smiles
 >"Alright, thanks Chain"
 >You all arrive at the entrance to the spa and pass through the arch
 >A guardpony acting as receptionist greets you
 >"Hi hi hi, what would you all like done today?"
 "We would like to check in on some friends. Anonymous, The Warden, Cookies n Cream, Sleepy Feathers, and Honey Heart"
 >The pony checks a ledger
 >"Looks like they reserved the group Jacuzzi, take that hallway and it'll be the third door on the left"
 >He points a hoof towards a hall
 >You thank him and your group heads to the room
 >As you reach the door, the sounds of laughter and splashing can be heard inside
 "Chain, you sure you're ready to face Anon again?"
 >Your brother nods
 >You push open the door
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >You were back to normal!
 >Honey Heart may know your secret, but she promised to keep it a secret
 >Anon had also shown you that he would love you no matter what happened
 >All in all, a pretty good day
 >And now it was ending with you sharing a Jacuzzi with friends
 >The door swings open and in walks trouble
 >The Bronze siblings, with an inmate in tow
 >They approach right up to the edge of the Jacuzzi before a word is said
 >Chain and Anon eye eachother warily during the approach
 >Chain speaks first
 >"Hello Anon"
 >Anon nods
 >"Hello Chain"
 >Chain sighs
 >"I came to properly apologize. For everything. You had me beat from day one, and I just kept pushing. Especially today, I went too far"
 >Anon nods
 >"I'd also like to apologize. You may have acted like a jerk, but I shouldn't have pushed you down"
 >Bust smiles
 >"I'm so glad you two aren't going to fight anymore!"
 >Chain nods
 >"I won't pick any more fights with you"
 >Anon smiles
 >"Same, though I do want to know where you learned so many good 'yo momma' jokes"
 >Chain smiles
 >"A lifetime of insulting other people's mothers"
 >Anon chuckles
 >"Fair enough... Just apologize to Cookies and we'll be perfect"
 >Chain nods and turns to you
 >"I'm really sorry for insulting you, can you please forgive me?"
 >He had insulted you like you had never been insulted before...
 >But if it would make Anon's life easier, you could forgive Chain
 "I forgive you"
 >Chain smiles in relief
 >A sudden splashing sound draws everyone's attention to the other side of the Jacuzzi
 >The Warden is excitedly splashing
 >Back in her own body
 >"OH WHAT FUN! I never expected I'd wake up in the Jacuzzi! Is this a party?"
 >Sleepy blinks awake, languidly stretching his wings to their full span with a smile
 >"It's so good to finally be back in my own body... I've really missed my wings"
 >Honey Heart scrunchies
 >"Why am I the last to return to normal?"
 >Anon laughs
 >"Maybe you are just a late bloomer?"
 >Honey Heart frowns at him
 >"That isn't funny, Anonymous"
 >Anon smiles
 >"Sorry... Don't worry, you'll change back soon"
 >The Warden raises a hoof
 >"Who is the little filly, and why is she in the prison? This place isn't safe for little ones! There are dangerous criminals about!"
 >Anon looks at her
 >"Don't worry, they'd have to get past Cookies, me, and Chain to get to her"
 >Chain nods
 >"A friend of Anon's is a friend of mine. From now on, anyone who plans on messing with him or his friends have to go through me first"
 >Anon chuckles
 >"And besides, that filly is actually Honey Heart suffering from poison joke
 >The Warden's eyes go wide with sudden understanding
 >Sleepy turns towards Honey Heart and takes a deep breath
 >"Hey Honey, want to make a wager?"
 >She raises an eyebrow
 >"Sure, what is the bet and what are we wagering?"
 >Sleepy smiles and blushes slightly
 >"I bet that you'll change back within the next few minutes. Loser takes winner out on a date"
 >Honey Heart smirks
 >"You're on"
 >No way!
 >Sleepy just asked Honey out!
 >IN FRONT OF THE WARDEN
 >No doubt The Warden will read off all the rules and regulations about how staff shouldn't have relationships with inmates and-
 >The Warden claps her hooves together excitedly
 >"Oh yay! I'm so happy for you two! I don't care who wins the wager, you both won in my opinion for finding eachother!"
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >What?
 >Anon's eyes widen in surprise at The Warden's reaction
 >With a loud pop, Honey changes back to her normal adult self
 >She lets out a massive sigh of relief
 >"Thank goodness... magic is harder as a filly"
 >Sleepy smirks
 >"Looks like you owe me a date"
 >The Warden winks at them
 >"I hope you two have fun, but not too much! Honey, want any help planning? I have some great ideas!"
 "Excuse me, Ma'am, are you really okay with staff-inmate relationships?"
 >The Warden looks perplexed
 >"Of course, why wouldn't I be? Everypony deserves love in their life, no matter what they've done"
 >Anon looks at you and shrugs
 >Guess it's alright to tell The Warden you two are a couple
 >...right?
 "Ma'am... I have a confession to make"
 >The Warden turns to you
 >"Yes Cookies, what is it?"
 >You can feel heat rushing to your face
 >This will be the first time you've said it out loud...
 "...Anon is my special somepony"
 >The Warden starts visibly shaking
 >"You mean to tell me that two of my staff have found somepony to care about and love?"
 >You gulp and nod
 >"FANTASTIC! This really is a party!"
 
 Be Anon
 >"FANTASTIC! This really is a party!"
 >AW COME ON!
 >all that sneaking and hiding and stress, and The Warden is excited for you both
 >While you are happy The Warden approves of your relationship with Cookies, it would've been nice to know sooner
 >All that cloak and dagger wasn't easy to keep up
 >"How long have you two been together?"
 "We've been a couple for a little while now"
 >The Warden lets out a squee
 >"And how close are you two?"
 >You smirk
 >You'll show her
 >You'll eat Cookies' churro WITH Cookies
 >'lady and the tramp' style
 "I'll show you. Give me a second"
 >You step out of the Jacuzzi and drip your way to Cookies' discarded uniform
 >You grab her churro and head back towards the water
 >Before you can make it half way, a yellow pony bursts into the room
 >"YOU DIDDLY DOOFUS!"
 >What?
 >"YOU HURT MY FRIENDO!"
 >The yellow pony runs up and kicks your shin
 >Then again
 >and again
 "ow! Hey, stop that!"
 >"NEVER YOU DINGLY DINGUS!"
 >Chain steps forward
 >"SWEATER, stop! Anon and I are cool now"
 >The pony looks over at Chain
 >"R-really?"
 >Chain nods
 >The yellow pony, Sweater, turns back to you and smiles sheepishly
 >"Sorry there neighborino... No hard feelings?"
 >The Warden sits straight up and shouts, sounding more official than you've ever heard her
 >"STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM! The one thing I will NOT tolerate is physical violence! You are charged with assaulting another inmate, and that's a paddlin'"
 >You knew what a spanking was like here
 >A pony could never survive the punishment
 >You had to help this little shin-kicker
 "Warden? Can I say something in his defense? He was only trying to avenge a friend, and he apologized"
 >The Warden slumps back down
 >"I can't let him go unpunished after brazenly attacking you like that"
 "Then how about he forfeits his next dessert to me?"
 >Sleepy has been rubbing off on you
 >The Warden nods
 >"That will work, as long as you are alright with it"
 >You nod
 >"Then it's settled"
 >Sweater beams a smile at you
 >"Mighty kind of you friendo!"
 "Don't mention it"
 
 
 Be Nice Sweater
 >Be leaving the Spa with Letter and the Bronze siblings
 >Anon sure was a swell fellow after all
 >You hurt him and he helped you get a minor punishment!
 >You'd have to find a way to properly thank him later
 >Bust moves to walk next to you
 >"I'm impressed that you were willing to take on Anon all by yourself!"
 >You shrug and you feel blood rushing to your face
 "Sometimes you just gotta fight for what's right. He hurt my friendo and bosserino Chain"
 
 
 Be Cookies
 >Be some time after the Bronze siblings left
 >Be walking through the spa lobby with The Warden and Anon
 >To eat a churro like that...
 >How risqué!
 >"Cookies, it looks like you are out of uniform"
 >You look yourself over
 >Your shirt is buttoned, your cap is on, everything appears to be in its proper place
 "Where am I out of uniform?"
 >Anon smirks
 >"How about my room in ten minutes?"
 >The Warden giggles madly
 >"Oh, that was good! Can I steal that line?"
 >Anon laughs
 >"Go for it"
 >The Warden claps her hooves together
 >"Just for that, I'm giving Cookies the rest of the night off. You two can have a super cuddly slumber party together!"
 >You like the sound of that
 >You like the sound of that a lot
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be an hour after leaving the Jacuzzi
 >You had such a good night's sleep, but you really overslept
 >You had so much paperwork!
 >You open an envelope marked 'urgent' and read the contents
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >OH JOY!
 >Princess Twilight had finished negotiations with foreign powers and was coming to visit your prison as scheduled!
 >THAT WAS TOMORROW
 >You quickly gather as many staff members as possible to prepare for Twilight's arrival
 >All except Cookies
 >She had a special somepony to take care of tonight
 
 Be Anon
 >Be waking up in the morning
 >With Cookies pressed up against you
 >The Warden had suggested Cookies stay in your cell for the night
 >A 'super cuddly sleepover!' as she put it
 >You open an eye to see Cookies' beautiful sleeping face across the pillow from yours
 >You can't help but smile as Cookies gently snores
 >You move your head closer to hers
 >Carefully, to avoid waking her
 >You stop with your nose pressing softly against hers
 >Happy with your adjustment, you relax your head back down on the pillow
 >Cookies smiles in her sleep
 >"Anon~"
 >Now that just wasn't fair
 >Your heart feels full of love
 >Cookies slowly wakes, tickled by your breath
 >Her eyes flutter open groggily
 >Her eyes dilate ever so slightly and her smile broadens
 "Good morning. Feeling bright-eyed and bushy-tailed?"
 >Cookies blushes
 >At this distance, you can feel the increase in warmth from her face
 >"If anypony would know the state of my tail, it would be you"
 >You chuckle and run your fingers through her mane
 >Cookies lets out a happy sigh at the stroke
 >You smile
 >Breakfast could wait
 >It was time for some morning cuddles
 >Cookies yawns and nuzzles her nose against yours
 >You tilt your head and give her a quick peck
 >"Oh Anon~... but shouldn't we go get breakfast soon?"
 "Breakfast can wait..."
 >You give her another quick peck
 "...Besides, you make a great lip-sandwich"
 >Cookies giggles and blushes fiercely
 >"Flirting won't make us immune to hunger"
 "I'm willing to try"
 >Cookies laughs and rolls her eyes
 >"We will be late to breakfast! Are you determined to get me in trouble?"
 >You smirk
 "Every chance I get"
 >Cookies nuzzles her nose against yours again
 >"What am I going to do with you?"
 >Your smirk grows
 "I thought you'd never ask!"
 >Cookies laughs and stands up on the bed
 >She stretches and lets out another huge yawn
 >You reach up and fondle an ear ,causing her yawn to morph into a moan
 >Cookies leans into your hand for just a second before pulling herself away
 >"Let's go get ready for breakfast"
 >You nod and Cookies hops to the floor, trotting towards your bathroom
 >You linger behind to watch her walk
 >She turns her head and smiles at you, before continuing her way to the bathroom
 >She brushes her teeth as you stretch out on the bed
 >Your limbs creak and pop
 >You glance over to Cookies
 >Looks like she has already gotten used to that human quirk
 >She finishes brushing her teeth and grabs her hairbrush
 >Good thing she had spare hair and tooth brushes in her locker
 >You may love her, but you just couldn't share your toothbrush with anyone else
 >That would be nasty
 >She walks over to you, hairbrush in mouth
 >"Aoh, rugh ie hair lease"
 >Silly pony
 >Doesn't she know you can't understand a word she says with her mouth full?
 >Based on context clues, she probably wants you to brush her mane and tail
 >They are pretty messed up after a night of wild cuddling
 >You sit up and hold out your hand
 >Cookies drops the brush into your outstretched hand with a small 'pleh' sound
 >She then jumps onto the bed and sits in your lap
 "Well well well, look who's getting bolder"
 >Cookies may be facing away from you, but you know she's blushing
 >"I can sit wherever I like, thank you very much"
 >You chuckle
 "Yes ma'am"
 >You take the end of her mane and start there, making short shallow brushes
 >You slowly work your way up, careful to avoid tugging on any snags or tangles
 >Cookies hums happily as you work
 "It must be insanely difficult to brush your hair by yourself"
 >Cookies gives a shallow nod to avoid pulling her mane
 >"Hooves aren't exactly designed for holding things. Usually I can get one of the other guards to help me when I sign in each morning"
 "Must still be difficult"
 >"yup, your hands are perfect though... Thank you for brushing me~"
 >You smirk
 >"Well, since most of these tangles are my fault I suppose it's the least I can do"
 >Cookies giggles and gives another short nod
 >You finish brushing Cookies' mane and tail in short order
 "All set. You look great"
 >Cookies smiles back at you
 >"Thanks again!"
 >She hops off and heads towards the door
 >"You ready for breakfast Anon?"
 >You shake your head
 "Haven't showered or brushed my teeth yet. Don't you want your boyfriend to look good too? "
 >Cookies' eyes practically sparkle when you call yourself her boyfriend
 >"You always look good "
 >You stride over to her and kneel down to nuzzle your nose against hers
 "Thanks love, I'll be about twenty minutes"
 >Cookies smiles and nods
 >"Take your time, I can wait"
 >You quickly perform your own morning routine while Cookies waits patiently
 >You finally emerge from the bathroom, a small cloud of steam escaping
 >"You done getting ready? Let's go get some food in you"
 >You nod
 "And after breakfast we can share a churro for dessert"
 >Cookies quickly turns to trot out the door
 >Trying and failing to hide a blush
 >Even after all you've been through together, all it took was a small tease to make her blush
 >That was one of your favorite things about her
 >She was always so adorable and innocent
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be eating breakfast with Honey Heart
 >Who is sitting just a little closer than is normally accepted
 >You don't mind one bit
 >She has a LOT of work to get done today, so this might be one of the few chances you two have to be together all day
 >Perfect
 >That gives you plenty of time to nap without fear of disturbance
 >You readjust your right wing, the one between you and Honey
 >You carefully extend it just enough to give her the briefest taste of your fluffiness level
 >She stiffens ever so slightly at your 'accidental' touch
 >You smirk and do it again after a few minutes
 >You manage to elicit the tiniest of blushes
 >Neat
 >You wait a few more minutes, eating your carrots as though nothing had happened...
 >...Then you shuffle your wing again
 >Before you can fully retract, your wing gets stuck
 >You glance over in surprise to see it enveloped by a magical aura
 >"You know, your wing may be more comfortable if it is fully extended. Leaving your wings folded for too long isn't healthy"
 >She uses her magic to gently extend your wing so that it is laying across her back
 >"There, leave your wing extended for at least twenty minutes. Nurses orders"
 >Your smirk grows
 "Sure"
 >Honey looks over at you for the first time since she sat down next to you
 >"My concern over your wing is purely medical. I'd actually prefer you not rest your wing on my back while it is extended"
 >She had placed your wing against her back quite firmly with her magic
 >You nod
 "I understand"
 >Honey nods and turns back to her meal, releasing your wing from her magical grasp
 >"Good, as long as we understand each other"
 >You resume eating
 >Honey Heart was right
 >Your wing was feeling much more comfortable now
 
 Be Anon
 >Be walking into the mess with Cookies
 >You go through the lunch line quickly and head towards your usual spot
 >...Where you see Sleepy hugging Honey with his wing
 >Damn, Sleepy worked fast
 >Or maybe Honey worked fast
 >It was a real coin toss which one of them was the aggressive one in the relationship
 >You sit across from Sleepy and Cookies sits next to you, across from Honey
 >You give Sleepy a nod
 >The kind of nod only best bro friends could give
 >The kind of nod that says "You are doing well for yourself. You have enticed an attractive female to be your significant other, and I applaud your skill. Truly, you have risen above the norm and found a diamond in the rough. When next we are away from the womenfolk, you simply must share your secrets of seduction"
 >Sleepy nods back
 >The kind of nod that only a best bro friend could respond with
 >The kind of nod that says "Thanks, sure"
 >You turn your focus to your food
 >You were gonna enjoy the shit out of these apple slices with peanut butter
 >You were about halfway through your meal when the Bronze siblings and Chain's cronies show up
 >"Mind if we join you?"
 >Cookies and Honey scoot over, forcing you and Sleepy to the end of the benches to make room for the group
 >And to ensure that Bust didn't sit next to their coltfriend
 "Go for it"
 >Bust and Sweater sit next to Honey Heart, while Letter and Chain sit next to Cookies
 >Your table is completely filled up by all the bodies
 >Chain leans over to better look at you
 >He gives you a friendly smile
 >"Hey Anon, yo momma so ugly that when she went into a haunted house, she came out with a job application"
 >You look over at him and he shoots you a wink
 >Some friendly sparing, eh?
 "Well Chain, yo momma so ugly she makes onions cry. Yo momma so ugly she also makes her pillow cry itself to sleep at night"
 >Chain laughs
 >"Good ones!"
 >You smile and pantomime a gracious bow
 >Sweater pushes his pudding cup over to you
 >"A promise is a promise. You really saved my tushy-tush yesterday, friendo"
 >You shrug
 "Don't mention it. I can respect your reasons behind it. And besides, it isn't like you hurt me"
 >He smiles
 >You open up your dual pudding cups and bask in the chocolate scent
 >You had really missed that smell while paying off your debt to Sleepy
 >You dip in a finger and gently swirl it in the cup
 >You extract your finger, scooping out some of the precious treat
 >You pop the finger into your mouth
 >Your mouth is instantly flooded by the rich coco taste
 >You lick your finger clean with a contented sigh
 >As you start to really dig into your pudding, The Warden's voice comes in over the P.A. system
 >"Attention everypony! I have fantastic news! Princess Twilight Sparkle has finished her diplomatic tour of the Minotaur capitol Labrynthia and will be coming to visit our little prison THIS AFTERNOON!"
 >The mess explodes with activity and noise
 >The other inmates were ecstatic
 >It wasn't every day they got to meet a newly arisen demigod
 >Cookies places a hoof on your leg
 >You look over and she is giving you a worried look
 >"Anon, will you be alright through the visit?"
 >Twilight and you didn't really mix well
 >That purple putz had gotten you sent to jail, after all
 >Not that you didn't like it here. You actually rather enjoyed it here
 >If it weren't for that original misunderstanding with your pocketknife, you'd never have met Cookies n Cream
 >You smile down at Cookies reassuringly
 "Don't worry, I'll be fine. It's the purple wonder horse who you should be watching. Who knows how she'll react to seeing me again"
 >The others at the table perk up
 >Chain leans over again to better speak to you
 >"You mean you met one of the princesses? I'm a noble and I haven't met any of the pony princesses yet!"
 >You nod
 "She's actually the one who got me sent to prison"
 >Bust tilts her head
 >"Why? What did you do?"
 >You chuckle and take a slurp of pudding
 "When I first arrived, all I had was the clothes on my back and the things in my pockets. My wallet, a pen, phone, and my trusty pocketknife"
 >Chain's eyes shine
 >"I love blades! What was it made of? Foam or rubber?"
 >You smirk
 "Metal"
 >The Bronze siblings and their companions stare at you in awe
 >Cookies and Honey already knew about why you were sentenced, and Sleepy had one hell of a poker face
 "I snap out the blade and Twilight can't use her magic on me or my stuff, so she tries to take it from me with her mouth. Ended up cutting her lip a little, barely drew any blood"
 >Chain's eyes are bugging out
 >"You mean you hurt a Princess so bad that she bled?!  Not even Tirek was able to draw blood!  If I'd known, I'd never have tried taking you on. You are one crazy mother hugger!"
 >You chuckle and shake your head
 "It was an accident"
 >Sweater raises a hoof
 >"I-I'd like to apologize again for kicking you, friendo"
 >You sigh
 "Don't worry, we're good. Besides, like I said before, what happened with the Princess was an accident"
 >The yellow pony smiles
 >You finish your meal while the rest of the group discusses the upcoming visit with excitement
 
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be trotting into the mess
 >You'd memorized several prisoner dossiers in preparation for the Princesses arrival
 >Anon might not react well to her
 >You scan the mess and spot him and his group at their usual spot
 >You canter over to their table
 "Good morning everypony! I hope you all are as excited for Princess Twilight's arrival as I am!"
 >They respond with nods and various affirmations
 >All except Anon
 >Anon is too busy licking his empty pudding cup clean
 >You grin at him
 "Anon, I trust you won't cause any trouble for our special guest?"
 >He rolls his eyes
 >"Don't worry mother, I promise to play nice with the purple horse"
 >You giggle
 "Silly Anon, I'm not your mother. Good to hear you won't try anything"
 >He nods and digs into the second pudding cup
 >As he does, you notice something...different about him
 "Anon, are you feeling alright?"
 >He looks at you curiously
 >"Yes...why do you ask?"
 >You point to a little mound protruding from behind his jawline
 "I don't want to worry you... but you have /something/ under your skin"
 >You struggle not to panic
 >Is Anon sick?
 >Is Anon hurt?
 "Nurse Heart, please take a look at this!"
 >Anon feels around his face
 >Understanding dawns in his eyes as his fingers settle over the bump
 >"You don't need to see it nurse Heart. It's just a zit"
 >You crinkle your nose at the word
 "What's a zit?"
 
 Be Anon
 >Once The Warden brought your attention to it, you easily found the mound of sensitive skin under your ear
 "You don't need to see it nurse Heart. It's just a zit"
 >Everyone looks at you curiously
 >The Warden wrinkles her nose
 >"What's a zit?"
 >Oh boy
 >Here we go again
 >The Warden will no doubt have a field day with this
 >You take a deep breath to steel yourself for what is to come
 "You don't want to know. Zits are gross and people are still eating"
 >The Warden shakes her head vigorously
 >"I need to know if you are healthy! Besides, you are the only one left eating"
 >Damn
 >It was worth a shot
 "Fine... Zits, also called pimples, happen when my pores get backed up"
 >Honey tilts her head
 >"Please go into further detail. Get backed up with what?"
 >This won't be pretty
 "Oils, sweat, even pus"
 >Everyone falls dead silent
 >Staring at you
 >The Warden takes a step closer
 >"Are you hurt? Can we cure it? How did it happen!?"
 "I'm not hurt, but it is sensitive. There is no cure, unfortunately. And lastly, these things just happen to humans"
 >The Warden's eyes are the size of plates
 >"B-But why did this happen?"
 >You shrug
 "Number of possibilities. Everything from minor -MINOR- infection, to bad luck, to face spiders"
 >Honey Heart raises an eyebrow
 >"Face spiders? Seriously?"
 >You nod
 >This'll get real gross real fast
 "Humans are hosts to countless microbes and parasites. One of the species that live on humans is a microscopic spider. I've heard they eat face oils and never poop"
 >Bust starts to dry heave
 >Cookies only looks a little sick
 >"D-Do you think I have any on me?"
 >You shrug
 "If you do, they probably won't live long. They need a human host to live"
 >Cookies looks only slightly less ill
 "So...yeah. Pimples, not fun but they happen. Anyone else want to change the subject? How is the weather out there? Another scorcher?"
 >The Warden nods numbly
 >Honey clears her throat
 >"Anon, if these...microbes... are bothering you, I can find a way to get rid of them"
 >You shake your head
 "There are countless beneficial things living on and in me. If you got rid of them I'd die"
 >Chain's eyes grow wide
 >"You mean they need you to live, and you need them?"
 >You nod
 "Eeyup, I'm a team effort"
 >Honey slowly nods dubiously
 >"If you say so..."
 >The Warden shuffles in place nervously
 >"How do you make it go away?"
 "There are two ways. Wait for it to go away on its own or pop it"
 >"P-Pop it?"
 >You nod
 "Break the skin, let whatever is clogged in there to drain out that way"
 >Bust runs from the table, holding her mouth
 >Sweater, looking a bit pale, gets off the bench
 >"I'll go check on Bust, make sure she's alright"
 >Without another word, he quickly follows Bust
 >You sigh
 "Seriously, let's change the subject. I'm healthy, and all this attention to a blemish is embarrassing"
 >Honey nods
 >"Very well, but I'd like to ask you more about this later. Scientists and doctors alike all around Equestria would love to know about this"
 >Chain stands up
 >"I've got to go anyway. I made plans with Lean Ligaments"
 "Lean Ligaments is that steel colored weight lifter, right?"
 >Chain nods
 >"Yeah, she's pretty nice"
 >She?
 >She was pretty far from feminine
 >You smile at him
 "Is this a date?"
 >Chain frowns
 >"I don't think so. We are just spending the day lifting together"
 >You wave goodbye as Chain leaves, with Letter in tow for some unknown reason
 
 Be Lean Ligaments
 >Be warming up in preparation for the arrival of Chain
 >You hadn't actually met him until well after you'd agreed to help him
 >You were /real/ happy you decided to help him
 >He was almost as well-built as you
 >He might actually be able to keep up with your routines
 >You grunt with effort as you lift a heavy thing
 >You weren't paying much attention to what you were lifting
 >"Ligaments, can you please put me down?"
 >Did your weight just talk?
 >You glance up
 >...You were lifting one of the other gym goers
 >You lower him back down carefully
 "Sorry about that, I was lost in thought"
 >He smiles
 >"No problem, you alright?"
 >You nod and smile
 "I'm fine, just thinking about my date. If he can keep up, I'll keep him"
 >The other pony laughs
 >"Good luck, have fun!"
 >You nod and turn towards a rack of heavy things to lift
 >You were getting a little nervous...
 >Better calm those nerves the only way you know how
 >You grab a set of heavy weights and start lifting
 
 Be Princess Twilight Sparkle
 >Be relaxing in your castle, sitting in your favorite chair reading the newspaper
 >After this week, you earned some down time
 >A straight week of diplomatic meetings had frayed your nerves
 >All you had today was a prison visit, nothing  you couldn't handle in your sleep
 >You were going to bring a very special treat to the prisoners too
 >Even misguided ponies need to be treated well
 >This prison in particular had a reputation for holding the worst of the worst
 >There was a pony there that had delayed an entire parade and set back Celestias schedule for three hours by occupying the center of the road and refusing to leave
 >His excuse? He was tired
 >Some ponies...
 >This prison also held Anonymous
 >That snake in the grass had acted politely enough during your first meeting with him, but showed his real colors quickly
 >He had tried to assassinate you!
 >You touch a hoof to your lip where his knife had dug deep into your flesh
 >It still acted up from time to time
 >It may be a maximum security prison, but you were still going to have a teleportation spell or two ready, just in case
 
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be on your way to your date with Honey
 >The Warden gave her the day off so you two could go on a date
 >And Honey was taking full advantage
 >She had decided to take you to a movie after breakfast, followed by some time in the arcade then the pool
 >She was going all out, full day date
 >You smile
 >She may not show it, but she wanted to impress you
 >You still got it
 >You were going to meet her at the theater
 >That way you both had time to prepare after breakfast
 >You had taken the time to preen your wings
 >You had done so with a different goal in mind than usual
 >Normally, you'd pull out excess down feathers and remove any dirt or broken feathers
 >This time, you had only pulled out broken feathers and dirt
 >Your wings were fluffier and warmer than usual
 >You had to walk with your wings extended to not drain your own energy, but there was no doubt Honey would notice the difference in your wing's texture between breakfast and the movie
 >Broken feathers can scratch, and dirt gives wings a grainy feeling
 >Your wings were at their peak in this moment
 >And you were going to use them mercilessly
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Be in the theater, waiting for Sleepy
 >You had arrived early
 >You didn't want to be tardy to your first date in...
 >Years?
 >You were out of practice
 >Most colts found your attitude off-putting
 >You nervously flick your tail
 >You refused to blow this
 >The theater was showing three movies: An action packed colt-flick, an emotional filly-flick, and a bad tragedy film
 >You were going to suggest the action film
 >Nothing is worse than a boring tragedy, and he didn't strike you as the type to enjoy 'Emotional Emotions, the Story of a Filly and her Imaginary Friend'"
 >At the very least, you weren't interested in the slightest in that filly-flick
 >Sleepy turns the corner down the hall
 >Showtime
 >You smile politely as he approaches
 "Hello again Sleepy. We have three options for movies to watch, and I thought I'd give you the choice of which one we watch"
 >He nods a hello
 >"Let me see the choices... 'Lord of the Strings'. Isn't that the one about a magic knitting needle?"
 >You nod
 >"option two... 'Emotional Emotions, the Story of a Filly and her Imaginary Friend'. By Luna, I almost fell asleep just reading the title"
 >You give a polite giggle
 >"And lastly... 'Missed Opportunities'... What is that one?"
 "It got terrible reviews. It's a tragedy about a filly who loses a tooth for the first time and throws it away before anypony can tell her about the Tooth Pegasus"
 >Sleepy chuckles
 >"That one"
 >You tilt your head
 "Really?"
 >Sleepy nods
 >"Nothing funnier than a bad tragedy. You ever see 'The Stable'? One of the best worst movies of all time"
 >You shake your head
 >Sleepy smiles
 >"We'll have to fix that at some point"
 >You smile and nod
 >Sleepy motions towards the ticket booth
 >"Shall we?"
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be sitting in an empty theater with Honey Heart
 >Be getting ready to laugh
 >Since the theater is completely empty except for the two of you, it will be okay to talk over the movie
 >You feign a stretch and extend your wings fully
 >You carefully lower your left wing to be behind Honey's back
 >You try to fold your wings closed and 'accidently' wrap her tightly in your softer than soft down
 >She lets out a surprised sound
 >"Be careful where you stretch your wings"
 >Though her tone is scolding, she doesn't try to remove your wing
 >She actually nuzzles in a little
 >You smirk
 >You got this
 >As the lights fade out and the screen lights up, Honey sighs happily
 >As the movie goes through the opening credits you feel Honey shifting
 >You glance over just in time to bonk you nose into her horn as she tried resting her head on your shoulder
 >You reflexively raise your hooves to your face as Honey recoils
 >"Are you alright? I didn't poke your eye, did I?!"
 >You shake your head with a grunt
 "I'm fine, just hit my nose. How is your horn?"
 >She's probably more hurt than you are
 >Horns are extremely sensitive
 >She touches her horn gingerly
 >"I'm fine... I apologize for banging into you like that"
 >You shrug, lowering your hooves
 "I'm alright"
 >You turn back towards the screen
 "Want to try resting your head on my shoulder again?"
 >She frowns
 >"I wasn't trying anything like that. It's better to watch movies with your head at an angle, everypony knows that!"
 >You smirk
 "Sure, whatever you say"
 >After a few minutes, she leans over and successfully rests her head on your shoulder
 >You give her a little squeeze with your wing and rest your own head on hers
 >...
 >She was right
 >It was better to watch the movie with your head tilted like this
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >Be feeling sick
 >Anon had.../things/ living inside him!
 >AND ON HIM!
 >You shudder
 >Maybe it was a good thing he didn't like you...
 >You bite your lip
 >He was like no one else
 >Tough, smart, and powerful~
 >But he was also covered in parasites!
 >And he didn't care!
 >You shudder
 >You hear the sound of hooves behind you
 >"How are you feeling?"
 >You turn to see Sweater, looking concerned
 >You smile weakly
 "I'm fine. Thanks for asking"
 >He nods
 >"You looked sick as a diddly-diamond dog"
 >He takes a few steps closer
 >"Can I get you some water or something?"
 >You shake your head
 >"Alright... If there is anything I can do, let me know! Can't let my friendo down"
 "I'm your 'friendo'?"
 >He nods and smiles
 >"Everypony I like is one of my friendos"
 >That is adorably naive
 "Not everyone you like thinks of you the same way. It isn't smart to get your hopes up"
 >He tilts his head
 >"What do you mean? Do you not like me?"
 "You are nice enough, but I barely know you. All I know is you like to say 'diddly' and you are brave enough to try and take Anon on in a physical fight"
 >He gives you a confused look
 >"But if I like you, and you  like me, doesn't that make us friendos?"
 "Sure, but people won't always like you as much as you like them"
 >He shrugs
 >"As long as people like each other at least a little, they can both be friendos"
 >You sigh
 >This is going nowhere
 >He beams you a grin
 >You find yourself smiling back
 >His grin is infectious
 
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Be walking out of the theater with Sleepy
 >Be in quite some pain
 >You haven't laughed that hard in as long as you can remember
 >Sleepy has a huge grin on his face
 >He may have gotten some light cuddles out of you, but you were the real winner
 >Those wings of his...
 >They were the stuff of legends
 >"Well then, shall we head to the arcade?"
 >You nod
 "I hope you enjoy getting second place"
 >Sleepy smirks
 >"Bring it on"
 
 Be Sleepy Feathers
 >Be at the arcade with Honey
 >Be preparing yourself for a vs. mode match on a band game
 >Honey had chosen to use the guitar
 >To gain an upper hand, you had decided to be both vocals and drums
 >Separately, neither could compete with the points of guitar
 >But together, you stood a chance
 >This would be intense
 >The track fades in and Honey's magical grip tightens on the guitar
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzuGDxJ0wTs
 >The button prompts come in a storm
 >You and Honey both explode into action
 >Her magic expertly squeezed the guitar
 >You were using your wings in tandem with your hooves for the drums
 >Neither of you miss a note during the intro
 >The hardest part was over
 "Breakin rocks in the hot sun! I fought the law and the law won"
 >Perfect pitch
 >You got this
 >Honey bites her lip, focusing intently on the screen
 "I miss my baby, and I feel so sad!"
 >As the song transitions to an instrumental portion, Honey's points shoot up
 >Guitars are overpowered
 >She smiles as she gains a sizeable point-lead
 >She even risks shooting you a smirk!
 >This simply will not do
 "Robbing people for sticks of gum!"
 >You'll need to step up your game
 "I miss my baby and I feel so sad"
 >There's an idea
 "She's the best girl I ever had!"
 >You extend a wing and give Honey a squeeze
 >You don't release her from the embrace
 >Your other limbs have to work a little harder, but you manage
 >Another instrumental comes up, and Honey gets a perfect score
 >The song was nearly over
 >She still had the advantage
 >You need to do /something/ if you want to win this
 >...
 >There's an idea
 >You wait until the very end
 "I fought the law and the...!"
 >Final three notes
 >They are worth the most points
 >You both have max point multipliers
 >But not for long
 >You give Honey a quick peck on the cheek, Using your free wing to bang out the final three notes on the drums
 >Honey freezes up, completely missing her final three notes
 >VICTORY!
 >You also got to kiss her cheek!
 >Double VICTORY!
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >Sleepy kissed your cheek!
 >HoneyHeart.exe has encountered an unexpected error
 >Send report? [y][n]
 >[n]
 >...
 >You blink as the final scores flash on screen
 >You had missed the final notes!?
 >You /never/ missed the final notes
 >Sleepy smirks
 >"Looks like I won"
 >You turn your head away from him to hide your blush
 "You only won because I let you win"
 >Sleepy chuckles
 >"Whatever you say... Which song shall we play next?"
 >Good question
 >You flick through the selection...
 >...
 >"How about that one?"
 >You shrug
 "Sure"
 >You use your magic to select the song
 >"Wanna play for a high score this time?"
 >You nod and grin
 >The screen fades to black as it loads up the song
 >The darkness is short lived and soon the track is on screen
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBgp5aDH23g
 >The intro is nice and easy on this one
 >This one actually had a music video going on in the background, too
 >Neat
 >Sleepy starts singing
 >"I was walking down the street when out the corner of my eye, I saw a pretty little thing approaching me..."
 >He winks at you
 >You bite your lip and focus on the button prompts
 >Perfect marks so far
 >You won't let yourself get distracted again
 >This time Sleepy was counting on you to get the best score possible
 >"Oh there ain't no rest for the wicked"
 >Sleepy is singing in excellent form
 >He seems to be getting a little emotional
 >Seems like 'no rest for the wicked' is a sad song for him
 >"...I saw the shadow of a colt creep out of sight. Then he swept up from behind, he put some gum up to my mane, he made it clear he wasn't looking for a fight"
 >Nopony wants gum in their mane
 >Even with magic, it's nearly impossible to remove
 >Sleepy has been magnificent this entire song
 >Perfectly in tune and on time
 >You have both managed perfect scores the entire time
 >Your point multipliers were at the max
 >You were both in peak form
 >"A couple hours pass and I was sitting in my house..."
 >Sleepy bobs his head in time to the music
 >He isn't even watching the prompts
 >He has the song memorized?
 >This really is an emotional song for him
 >"You know there ain't no rest for the wicked, 'til we close our eyes for good..."
 >A single tear rolls down his cheek
 >Sleepy wipes the tear away with a wing
 >The song fades out and your scores flash on screen
 >New high score!
 >"Good job. Do you play the guitar for real?"
 >You nod
 "I enjoy it. It is a good way to relax and practice delicate magic manipulations at the same time"
 >Sleepy nods
 >"Makes sense"
 >You stretch and shake yourself out a little
 >Those songs were intense
 "I'm feeling taped out on games"
 >"It's almost time for lunch anyway"
 >You nod
 >"Let's go get something to eat"
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be the center of a flurry of activity
 >YOU NEED TO PREPARE
 >There are too many things you don't have ready!
 >You still needed a stage to be set up in the mess for the Princess to speechitate from!
 >She was going to bring a present to the inmates, you'd need rope barriers set up around the mess
 "Somepony get me Spit Valve and Blue Dancer!"
 >They could set up an appropriate welcome for the Princess for you
 >You give orders to your guards and inmate volunteers as fast as they can complete them
 >You had so much to do, and so little time!
 
 
 Be Honey Heart
 >The smell of chlorine fills the air
 >Such a lovely, clean smell
 >Sleepy holds the door open for you and you step into the room
 >Except for the lifeguard, you and Sleepy had the place to yourselves
 >You head into the mares changing room and quickly get into a swimsuit
 >A rather risqué piece that hugged your form and left little to the imagination
 >You had picked it up yesterday just for today
 >Sleepy had better be impressed
 >It wasn't easy to get into
 >By the time you are dressed, Sleepy is already by the poolside
 >He turns as your hooves click against the smooth tile
 >His eyes widen and his jaw drops
 >Aw yeah
 >You got this
 >Why not give him a little show?
 >You smirk and strut a little
 >You use your magic to gently push his mouth closed
 >He shakes the stupor out of his head and blinks a couple times
 "So, what do you think of my swimsuit?"
 >"I like it"
 >Yeah he does
 >You levitate a pair of towels from a rack to a beach chair
 >With towels taken care of, you take your first few steps into the pool
 >Sleepy takes a few lazy flaps with his wings, rising into the air
 >He tilts, and with one final flap, he begins a short dive
 >Pinning his wings back, he enters the pool with a tiny splash
 >You can't help but marvel at his skill as he modifies his flapping technique to efficiently swim towards you underwater
 >Little bubbles leave a breadcrumb trail as he glides effortlessly through the water
 >He finally surfaces just in front of you, where it is shallow enough for him to stand
 "I had no idea you were such an adept swimmer"
 >Sleepy grins
 >"Swimming is just like flying, except easier"
 "I'm a pretty skilled swimmer too"
 >"That so?"
 >You nod
 "I could probably beat you in a race"
 >A light glints in Sleepy's eyes
 >"Want to make a wager?"
 >You know exactly where this is going
 "Sure, what is the wager?"
 >"We'll race from the shallow end to the deep end, then back. If I win, you owe me a kiss"
 "And if I win, you owe me two"
 >The lifeguard's coat turns bright pink at such brash behavior
 >You and Sleepy wade back to the pool's edge
 "We'll go on the count of three"
 >"Three"
 >You channel your magic into the water, solidifying it
 "Two"
 >You coat your body with the solid liquid
 >"ONE"
 "ONE"
 >You both jump into action, Sleepy taking a quick lead
 >Sleepy splashes forward, flapping his wings for extra momentum
 >As soon as the water became deep enough, he dives in and begins using his wings to swim like a penguin
 >You channel the magical gel wetsuit forward, moving you fast as a fish
 >But penguins eat fish
 >Sleepy may have faster acceleration, but you have better stamina
 >You can already tell, this will be a close one
 >Sleepy beats you to the far wall
 >He's ahead of you by a few seconds
 >You reach the wall and kick off
 >You are catching up to him fast
 >As soon as the water becomes shallow enough to run, you both gallop for the finish
 >You both reach the end simultaneously
 >You release your hold on the magical gel and it's consistency returns to water
 >Sleepy looks at you, breathing heavily
 >"Looks like a tie"
 >You nod
 "It is my professional opinion that we tied"
 >He chuckles
 >"Looks like we both lost"
 >You smirk
 "I'd say we both won..."
 >The Lifeguard covers his eyes in embarrassment as you lean in towards Sleepy
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be in the middle of your third shower
 >The things you do for love
 >You glance over at Cookies
 >Cookies had grabbed a pair of swimming trunks for you earlier so she could be in the bathroom with you while you showered
 "Can we just get to the cuddling now?"
 >She shakes her head
 >"Not until you are clean"
 "You know, EVERY animal has /something/ living on or in it"
 >Cookies frowns
 >"They shouldn't"
 >You shake your head
 "You have bacteria in your gut right now that helps you digest food. Humans do too. So do dogs and cats"
 >Cookies bites her lip
 >"How can you be sure?"
 >You point towards her spare toothbrush
 "You brush your teeth, right?"
 >Cookies frown grows indignant
 >"Of course I do!"
 "There is my proof. We need to brush our teeth because there are microbes in our mouths"
 >Cookies eyes go wide
 >"R-Really?"
 >You nod
 "I'd bet that you also have benign things living on you. I know that if I was microscopic, I'd want to live on you"
 >You give her a wink
 >She is torn between being disturbed and giggling
 "Besides, have you ever felt bad after we've finished cuddling?"
 >She forcefully shakes her head
 "So why let it bother you now?"
 >You lower your voice
 "I'll even do that thing you like with your ears"
 >Cookies bites her lip, clearly torn
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >Maybe she'll agree to a compromise?
 "How about this: We'll cuddle in the shower"
 >Cookies thinks for a minute
 >"Alright..."
 >She hops into the shower, instantly getting soaked
 >You sit down and Cookies sits on your lap, facing you
 >The water is spraying in your face, so you close your eyes
 >Cookies' weight presses comfortably against your lap
 >Her front legs pressed against your chest
 >The tiles feel cool against your back
 >The warm water gently massages your face with every drop
 >You stroke her mane with your left hand
 >With your right, you begin fondling the base of her ear
 >She takes a deep breath...
 >...then rests her head on your shoulder
 >"I'm sorry"
 >You apply more pressure with your stroking hand
 "You're grossed out. It's understandable. You haven't left me, which is the important thing"
 >She squirms a little against you
 >"It's still gross to think that there are...things /living/ on me. It makes my coat itch"
 >You grin and begin roughly scratching her all over with both hands
 "How's this feel?"
 >She giggles
 >"Good, but I want you back on my ears"
 "As you wish"
 >Your hands migrate to her ears, fondling and gently squeezing
 >She sighs happily
 >You begin rubbing up and down with your thumbs, massaging the middle of her ears
 >She hums cutely in pleasure
 >She tilts her head into your hands
 >"I love you"
 "I know"
 >You smirk
 >You've always wanted to say that
 >Cookies pulls her head back and paws at you with a hoof
 >"That wasn't the answer I was looking for"
 >You chuckle
 "I know, I know... I love you too"
 >She relaxes back down against you
 >"Much better..."
 >You scratch her back with your left hand, while the right pinches her withers
 >You turn your head and press your face against her neck
 >She stiffens a little, then relaxes
 >"I suppose I'm okay with your bugs if you are"
 >You smile against her coat
 "Good, because you are my cuddlebug"
 >She giggles
 >"That was terrible"
 "I know"
 >You wrap your arms around her and squeeze her tight against your chest
 >You stay that way for a long time
 >Both hearts beating in rhythm against each other as the warm water pours down
 
 Be Twilight Sparkle
 >Be Princess of Friendship
 >Be Element of Harmony: Magic
 >Be Celestia's student
 >Be sovereign of your own castle
 >Be standing in front of the prison with your friend Rainbow Dash
 "I could really use a friendly face in there, Rainbow"
 >Dash shrugs
 >"Sorry, I've already spent enough time in prison"
 >You give her a pleading look
 >"Why can't you find somepony else?"
 >You huff
 "Fluttershy is too scared, Spike is running errands, Rarity is Rarity, Pinkie is too busy planning a party, and AJ is doing what she does best"
 >"Apples?"
 "Apples"
 >RD shrugs
 >"Don't you know anypony else who might go?"
 >You shake your head
 "Are you sure you don't want to come inside, Rainbow Dash?"
 
 
 
 Be The Warden
 >Be in the mess
 >It is lunch time
 >Time for the royal, most excellent Twilight's visit
 >You had the mess arranged with the tables forming a makeshift stage
 >All the benches were set up in front of the stage for the inmates and guards
 >Each inmate had been given an assigned seat based on alphabetical order
 >The crowd of inmates are chatting and laughing excitedly
 >They were about to see a princess!
 >You step up onto the stage
 >It was time to introduce the Princess
 "Good afternoon everypony!"
 >The crowd responds as one
 >"Good afternoon Warden!"
 >You smile broadly
 >You may be nervous, but you could still wrangle a crowd like none other
 "It is my great pleasure to introduce her majesty, Princess Twilight Sparkle! Princess of Friendship! Element of Harmony! The Embodiment of Magic! The Student of Celestia! The-"
 >A somepony shouts out
 >"GET ON WITH IT"
 >Hey
 >Rude
 >The crowd is growing restless
 >Better just get on with it
 "Her Esteemed Magnanimous Magnificence, TWILIGHT SPARKLE!"
 >You step aside as a fanfare marks the entrance of the Princess
 >Twilight walks to the 'stage' with her wings majestically stretched to their full extent
 >You barely manage a whisper
 "B-Beautiful...!"
 
 
 Be Twilight Sparkle
 >Be waiting outside the prison's mess hall
 >The warden (Who, it turns out, was named 'The Warden') was introducing you to the crowd
 >"...Princess of Friendship!..."
 >This is taking forever
 >"...Element of Harmony!..."
 >Doesn't she realize you have twelve other appointments today?
 >"...The Embodiment of Magic!..."
 >She must be done now
 >"...The Student of Celestia!..."
 >Just how many titles did you have?
 >"...The-"
 >OH COME ON
 "GET ON WITH IT"
 >The Warden pauses
 >"Her Esteemed Magnanimous Magnificence, TWILIGHT SPARKLE!"
 >Finally
 >You swing open the mess hall doors to triumphant fanfare
 >They weren't very good...
 >You walk to the 'stage' and face the crowd of wildly cheering inmates
 >You scan the crowd...
 >Anonymous isn't here
 >Good
 >The Warden must have realized that Anon was dangerous and kept him away from the event
 >Perfect, you can rest easy
 "My Little Ponies!"
 >The crowd hushes
 "As you know, this is the highest security prison there is. You have all been imprisoned here based on horrendous crimes ranging from calling people names to causing international incidents"
 >A few ponies in the crowd cough nervously
 >A few others loudly apologize
 >You raise a hoof to silence them
 "It has been said that a nation can be judged based on how they treat their prisoners.  You have all been well behaved as well. As a result of these factors, by decree of Celestia herself, I come bearing a gift for you all!"
 >You teleport in several large open-top containers, a table, a pitcher, and an empty drinking glass
 >The crowd is perfectly silent, enthralled by your words
 >You magically lift the pitcher and begin pouring its contents into the glass
 "These containers behind me are filled with chocolate milk from the royal dairy farm. This is the greatest delicacy a dairy can produce. A single glass can cost over two hundred bits!"
 >The crowd gasps in wonder
 >You smile
 >This was going splendidly
 >Suddenly, the doors at the far end of the mess swing open and.../HE/ steps in
 >Anon
 >His gaze settles in your direction, and he begins running towards the stage
 >OH SWEET CELESTIA, HE'S COME TO FINISH YOU OFF!
 
 
 Be Anon
 >Be late for lunch
 >You are running down the halls with Cookies
 >"Come on! Hurry up!"
 >You turn the corner to find the mess door closed with a guard pony standing in front looking miserable
 >Cookies hurries up to him
 >"We aren't too late, are we?"
 >The guard perks up
 >"Nope, with you two here I can go inside too!"
 >He turns to you
 >"Seating is alphabetical, you are sitting in the front"
 >Neat
 >A for Anonymous
 >He pushes open the door and you hurry through
 >Purplebutt is already on stage
 >Twilight's eyes are glued to you
 >You spot your seat and run towards it as quietly as possible
 >Wouldn't want to cause a disturbance
 >Her eyes widen as you rush forward
 >Her wings snap open and her expression shifts to one of abject horror
 >"SOMEPONY STOP HIM! HE'S COMING FOR ME!"
 >wut?
 >Twilight rears up, knocking the table in front of her
 >The glass sitting on the table flies off the stage and shatters
 >She tries to backpedal away, and forcefully bumps into the large containers
 >They slowly tip and fall over, sloshing their contents onto the floor
 >Her horn lights up and she screams
 >With a flash of light, she's gone
 >...What'd you do?
 >The mess is dead silent for a full fifteen seconds
 >No one moved
 >The only sound was the dripping of chocolate milk
 >The mess explodes into action
 >The prisoners shout and scream angrily
 >The guards move in, attempting to calm the roudy inmates with churros and relaxing words
 >It doesn't work
 >The inmates surge out of the seating area
 >Some run for the chocolate milk, drinking it off the floor
 >Nasty
 >Some inmates begin shouting insults at the absent Twilight
 >Others run for the lunch line and begin throwing food around
 >It's a riot!
 >You spot a gang of inmates roughhousing with a guard who is in tears
 >This was madness
 >Cookies is  in danger
 >A group of inmates run away, carrying The Warden on their backs
 >She screams and wiggles her legs uselessly in the air
 >Cookies rushes up next to you
 >"What happened?!"
 "I don't know! That freaky princess screamed at me and then dumped everything on the floor!"
 >Cookies bares her teeth
 >"I've got to stop this!"
 >She begins to walk towards the riot, but you step in front of her
 >"Let me go, I have to do my job!"
 >You shake your head
 "It is way too dangerous for you over there!"
 >"I can't just twiddle my hooves! I have a job to do!"
 >You frown
 "Running in there won't do any good. You'll be overwhelmed"
 >She looks up at you and shouts
 >"What would you have me do? Abandon my post?!"
 "There has to be a better way!"
 >Cookies frowns
 >"Well, I'm listening!"
 >You stop
 >Is there a better way?
 >Think Anon, THINK!
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7VmOZ4Ppj8
 "Brain blast"
 >"What?"
 "The P.A. system runs through the whole prison, right?"
 >Cookies nods
 "Good, take me there"
 >Cookies nods again and starts galloping
 >You follow right behind
 >You'd need something powerful to get the inmates to stop rioting
 >Music holds significant emotional power in this world
 >You'd need to sing something
 >Can't be anything scary... Ponies already fear you more than enough
 >Something sad then
 >Cookies turns the corner and nearly runs over Honey and Sleepy
 >Honey looks at Cookies
 >"What's going on?"
 >Cookies takes a step back
 >"Prison riot. Anon has a plan"
 >You nod
 "Sleepy, how many super-pillows do you have?"
 >"Two in my room"
 >You grin
 "Perfect, use those to block out sound. I'll let you know when you can stop covering your ears. Cookies, how close are we to the P.A. system?"
 >Cookies points down the hall
 >"Down the hall and to the left, first door"
 "Good, go cover your ears with the pillow in my room"
 >She tilts her head
 >"What are you planning?"
 "Song from my world.  I don't know how effective this will be and I don't want you three getting hurt"
 >Cookies bites her lip
 >"I can help. Let me come with you"
 >You shake your head
 "No, I'm doing this on my own. Go to my room, it'll be safe there"
 >Cookies moves to protest again, but Sleepy cuts her off
 >"Anon seems to know what he's up to. Leave him to it"
 "Thanks Sleepy, please be careful everyone. I'll start singing in three minutes. Be covered before that"
 >Sleepy nods
 >"Stay safe"
 "You too"
 >Cookies leans against you
 >"I love you, please be careful"
 >You smile
 "I love you too"
 >Honey starts trotting away
 >"Come on everpony, let's let the man work"
 >You give a quick wave goodbye as they gallop away
 >Cookies keeps glancing over her shoulder at you until they reach a turn in the hall
 >As they disappear around the bend, you turn and run towards the communications room
 >Time to end this
 >You fling open the door and grab the intercom
 >You still had a minute or two before you could start singing
 >Had to give your friends time to protect themselves
 >...
 >..
 >.
 >.
 >..
 >...
 >That should do it
 >What song can you sing?
 >...
 >That one would do nicely
 >You press a button and some minor feedback heralds the start of your song
 >This may be overkill...
 >But it was undoubtedly obvious and depressing enough
 >You take a deep breath
 >This will likely only work if you really sing with emotion
 >You push down your embarrassment at the idea of singing and begin the song
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIIqYqtR1lY
 "Through early morning fog I see..."
 >You can hear the noise in the prison quieting down a little
 "Visions of the things to be..."
 >You're committed to this plan now
 "The pains that are withheld for me..."
 >Here we go
 >Hopefully Cookies can't hear this
 >She'd cry herself silly if she heard any more
 "I realize and I can see..."
 >Here goes nothing
 "...That suicide is painless..."
 >You can't hear anything beyond your own singing
 >And... is that a guitar?
 >From the fucking ether?!
 >You thought only ponies could summon ghost music
 >Whatever, at least this is working
 >You think
 >Time to really pour it on
 >Just in case anyone is still rioting out there
 >Every bad day you've ever had, every rejection, every time you failed, and every time you missed your family since arriving here
 >You channel it all into the song
 >A tear rolls down your cheek
 >As each painful memory plays through your head, the song becomes harder to sing...
 >...And more powerful
 
 Be The Warden
 >EVERYTHING IS SADNESS!
 >POOR ANON!
 >DON'T HURT YOURSELF!
 >[Sad horse noises]
 
 Be Cookies
 >You can't hear anything with the pillow covering your ears
 >But you can feel something wrong
 >You can feel Anon in pain
 >You promised you would wait for him to tell you it was okay to move
 >But this is killing you
 >You bite your lip
 "Please be okay..."
 
 Be Bronze Bust
 >Anon's song...
 >Soul crushing...
 >Tears are streaming down your face
 >You feel a pair of hooves on your head, and the music is dampened
 >You look over your shoulder and see Sweater, bawling his eyes out
 >He's trying to protect you from the sadness
 
 Be Anon
 "Pleeeeeaaaaase..."
 >There, it was done
 >You release the talk button on the P.A. system
 >You lean back and listen carefully
 >The prison is silent
 >Mostly
 >Wails and sobs can be heard throughout the prison
 >You walk the halls, finding groups of inmates and guards alike huddled together crying
 >The riot was done
 >It's over
 >You make your way to your cell and find Cookies with her head safely buried in the pillow
 >You gently tap her flank and she jumps a little
 >She pulls her head from the pillow cocoon
 >"Anon! Did it work? Are you alright? I can't explain it, but I felt like you were in pain..."
 >You sit next to her and wrap her in a tight hug
 "I'm fine, glad you're okay. Let's go let Sleepy and Honey know I'm finished"
 >Cookies nods
 >You both head towards Sleepy's cell, passing countless incapacitated ponies
 >You open the door to Sleepy's cell and find Honey and Sleepy safe and sound, heads covered by super-pillows
 >You gently shake them, letting them know the coast is clear
 "The riot is over, everyone has calmed down"
 >Sleepy smiles
 >"Good job, I knew you could do it. Well done"
 >You smile back
 "aw shucks, you'll make me blush"
 >"I could have done it, but it would have been too much effort"
 >You and Sleepy share a laugh
 >"Well... now what?"
 >Good question
 >Honey starts walking towards the door
 >"I'm going to go check out the mess, make sure everypony is okay"
 >Sleepy nods
 >"I'll go with you"
 >You shrug
 "I'll come too, got nothing better to do. Cookies, you coming as well?"
 >She nods
 >Your group approaches the mess to find the ponies there in a massive puddle of tears
 >...Maybe you overdid it
 >Oh well, can't change the past
 >Honey hurries around the mess, helping any inmates or guards with ouchies
 >You find a dry space on the stage and sit
 >Cookies walks over to you to say something, but is cut off by a brilliant flash of light
 >"What happened here?"
 >You turn as the light fades and spot the source of the voice
 >A massive white alicorn, a massive blue alicorn, and a puny purple alicorn
 >Celestia, Luna, and Twilight Spazzle
 >It was Celestia who spoke
 >All the ponies in the room still aware enough to notice instantly bow
 >Luna and Twilight watch you warily
 >Celestia walks to Cookies, who is the nearest guard
 >"Don't be afraid, my little pony. Please tell me what happened here"
 >Cookies gulps and takes a deep breath
 >Meeting a god is scary
 >"P-Princess Twilight spilled the chocolate milk, then the prisoners rioted. All except inmate Anonymous. He put down the riot all by himself by singing"
 >Celestia turns to you
 >"Is that so? You have done well. For keeping the peace with an act of heroism, I hereby end your prison sentence"
 >Wow
 >That was easy
 >You thought you'd spend the rest of your life in this prison
 >But you just got a full pardon from a god-queen
 >Luna rushes to her sister's side
 >"SISTER! You cannot release this prisoner! I have seen his mind, and it is dark! He cannot be released!"
 >Twilight nods furiously
 >"He is a danger to everypony around him!"
 >This gets Cookies angry
 >"He is NOT!"
 >Cookies blanches as she realizes she just contradicted not just one god, but one god and a royal suck up
 >"Uh, I mean, he's nice once you get to know him..."
 >Her voice fades out and she defaults back into a bow
 >Celestia raises an eyebrow
 >"It would appear that I am outnumbered"
 >She turns to face you fully
 >"Anonymous, based on the advice of my sister and Princess Twilight Sparkle I cannot release you"
 >AW COME ON!
 >"However, you should still be rewarded for your bravery. Therefore I sentence you to home arrest. Because you do not have a home, I shall have one built for you"
 >She turns towards Twilight
 >"Your home will be paid for by my student, as punishment for spilling so much royal chocolate milk"
 >Twilight whimpers
 >"Because your home will not have the same amenities this facility has, you will be allowed out of your home and visit any location as long as you have a guard chaperone. Do you have anypony in mind for that position?"
 >Yes
 >Yes you do
 "I'd like my chaperone to be the Guardpony Cookies n Cream"
 >Celestia nods her head
 >"Very well. You will stay in this facility until your home is complete"
 >You nod
 "Thank you"
 >"You are most welcome. Now then, let's get this place running again"
 >Under Celestia's direct supervision, the prison is quickly back in working order
 >They had Cookies running the prison while The Warden and all the other guards were indisposed
 >After setting things in order, Celestia left with Twilight and Luna in another massive flash of brilliant light
 >You sigh and lean back
 >You'd had one hell of a day
 >And it wasn't even dinner time yet
 >You head back to the food line and snag a pudding cup
 >Then five more
 >You hurry back to your cell with your bounty
 >You'd earned it
 >You'd save one or two for Cookies
 
 
 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++										  +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++Epilogue+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 Be Anon
 >Be relaxing in your house
 >Be living with your ultimate waifu
 >"Anon, are you ready to leave?"
 "Ready whenever you are!"
 >It has been a couple months since the chocolate milk incident
 >And life was great
 >Sleepy had completed his sentence a few days after the incident
 >He got out early due to good behavior
 >You still visited the prison on occasion to see the Bronze siblings and check in with The Warden
 >But that wasn't why you were leaving the house today
 >"I'm ready, let's go! I'm tired of always being late with you"
 >You hop out of your favorite chair and head towards the door
 >Where Cookies is impatiently trotting in place
 >She is wearing a beautiful dark green gown
 >Her mane is in a low ponytail
 >"Come on, we'll be late!"
 >You follow Cookies out the door
 >You both make your way to a little clearing in the woods beside a lake
 >Sleepy had taken you there several times before
 >It was the perfect place for an afternoon nap
 >You arrive to see a small crowd gathered in the clearing
 >Sleepy sees you and waves you over, while Honey does the same with Cookies
 >Sleepy is wearing a little suit
 >"Hey Anon, oversleep?"
 "That's your thing. Nah, I have no excuse. Sorry for being late"
 >He smiles
 >"You are here now, that's the important thing"
 >You nod and smile
 >He spreads his wings to their full extent
 >"How do I look?"
 >You give him a thumbs up
 >"...The hay does that mean?"
 >You chuckle
 "Looking good bud"
 >He nods
 >"Alright, thank you"
 >He stretches and flexes, shifting nervously before letting out a massive yawn
 "You alright Sleepy?"
 >"Just a little nervous. I couldn't sleep last night"
 >You give him a smile
 "Don't worry, you've already gotten past the hard part"
 >Sleepy shrugs
 >"If you say so"
 "Relax, you got this"
 >Sleepy smiles gratefully
 >"Let's change the subject for now. Get my mind off it all"
 "Sure"
 >"You know they're calling your song 'The Human's Lament', right? It has been declared the saddest song in existence"
 >You nod
 "I know.  How is Honey's career going?"
 >Sleepy grins broadly
 >"Thanks to you, she's working in a research lab now.  She can mostly set her own hours and works in a volunteer clinic in her free time"
 >You mirror his grin
 "Good to hear! I'm glad she's doing so well. She always worked so damn hard"
 >Sleepy nods, then tilts his head
 >"You hear anything about the Bronze siblings?"
 "I heard they were released and moved back to Labrynthia. Also heard they brought a few friends with them"
 >Sleepy nods
 >"I heard the same"
 "Is The Warden coming today?"
 >"She's already here, somewhere"
 >You scan the crowd
 >You spot The Warden bawling her eyes out with ponies gathered around her
 "She's over there, crying"
 >You point in the right general direction
 >"Let's go make sure she's alright"
 >You nod
 >You and Sleepy wade through the crowd and approach The Warden
 "Hey there Warden, you alright?"
 >She sniffles and nods, before letting out a loud sob
 >"I-I-I'm sorry, I always cry at weddings!"
 >You chuckle
 "It hasn't even started yet!"
 >The Warden just responds with crying horse noises
 >You chuckle and shake your head
 >Sleepy checks a clock that had been hung on a tree nearby
 >"It's almost time. You ready Anon?"
 >You nod
 "Sure thing, I'm ready to be your best horse"
 >He smiles
 >"You mean best pony"
 "Compromise: best man?"
 >Sleepy holds out a hoof
 >"Deal"
 >You chuckle and shake his hoof