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 >"Yo, Anon. Me and the girls were going to go to the bar to try and pick up some mares. Or stallions. Or whatever. Wanna come with us?"
 
 >"Me and the girls", that's what she said.
 >It started to seem suspicious when "the girls" never show up.
 >More so when Dash cockblocks you everytime you attempt to put the moves on someone.
 >Especially so when she gets mad when you try to wingman for her.
 >Finally, enough liquid courage in you, you blurt out what you damned well knew already.
 "Dash, was this a really lame excuse to take me on a date?"
 >She nearly chokes on her drink and coughs a few times.
 >Despite the act, you see the telltale signs she's embarrassed.
 >Red cheeks, slightly pomf'ed wings.
 >"What? Me? You? A date?! B'wahahaha! Anon. come on, I'm waaaay out of your league!"
 "Right"
 >"I mean, I'm the most awesome pegasus who ever flew! You can't even fly!"
 "Uh-huh."
 >"So why would you think I want to date some...two legged not-flying...whatever you are?"
 >You fold your arms and smirk.
 "So this was just a bad night for both of us then."
 >"As if! I struck out so you wouldn't feel bad about how terrible you were doing! I can pick up anyone in this bar!"
 >Score.
 "Not everyone."
 >"Name one guy who wouldn't--"
 "Me"
 >She swallowed hard as she took another gulp of cider.
 >You got her now.
 >"Come on, Anon, I just said--"
 "You said you wouldn't date me, I get it, I'm lame. But that doesn't mean I'd let you pick me up any easier."
 >"Yea right, anyone, even you, would kill to be with me!"
 "Prove it then, woo me."
 >Her wings went from half mast to full blown pomf'ed.
 >The night just got interesting.
 >"This isn't fair, you'll say no now!  You'll cheat cause you don't like losing anymore than I do!"
 "Tell you what, everytime I say no, I'll take a shot. Drunker I get, more likely I'm going to forget I'm trying to resist the awesome Rainbow Dash, right?"
 >Her eyes gleam for a split second, even if it was a halfhearted praise.
 >You would have missed it a month ago but enough time with Dash and you knew when she had at the bare minimum a crush.
 >It felt good too, you never had anyone legitimately crush on you before you got to Equestria.
 >While the mares had been coming and going, Rainbow always stuck around.
 >Lately, you've been seeing her every day.
 >She'd always have an excuse to make you two hang out, not that you minded.
 >Tonight wasn't the first night she had created problems for your game either.
 >"Deal!"
 >She spat on her hoof.
 >You do the same on your fist and pound her hoof, sealing the bet.
 >"I'll be back in five, don't you lame out on this while I'm gone!"
 >She sped off to who knows where.
 >You chuckle and shake your head.
 >While she's gone, you decide to relocate yourself to the bar.
 >Figured you'd make things more legitimate for her and not be quietly waiting at the same table.
 >That and your mug had gotten lighter and needed a refill.
 >As the barkeep topped you off, a hoof pressed into your thigh.
 >"Hey stud, been awhile~"
 >Sheesh she's not wasting any time.
 >You snicker and turn toward her.
 "You're going to have to do a little better than that.....Berry Punch?"
 >The pink and purple mare giggled and leaned closer.
 >You could smell the cheap wine on her.
 >Then again, when couldn't you?
 >"That...workssfine last weeks!  Anooons, why's tonight so...fucking special?"
 >She winked and sloppily took a swig from whatever swill was in that glass.
 >She leaned too far back and nearly toppled off the stool.
 >Don't judge, this was pretty good for her past 9PM.
 >You considered telling her the truth, that Dash was going to come in and kick her ass if she saw-
 >Wait
 >Actually
 >This is pretty perfect.
 >Dash not only would have to pick you up, she'd have to steal you away.
 >Not to mention she gets extra cute when she's jealous, in that bitchy sort of way you've grown fond of.
 >Moving back slightly so as not to be too eager to talk to the drunk mare, you smile and brush some hair to the side.
 "Oh, I dunno, long day, that sort of thing."
 >"Oh Sellissia, tell me about it! My sister is five hooves up my tush again about..."
 >She started to slur and yammer on about Cheerilee when in the corner of your eye you saw Dash re-entering the bar.
 >Dash looked to the empty table puzzled, then saw you at the bar.
 >With Berry Punch.
 >Leaning on you, lips dangerously close to yours.
 >You could see the fire in her eyes from here.
 >You winked at her and stuck your tongue out.
 >War officially declared.
 >You turned back to Berry Punch, who was still jabbering on about how Cheerilee is never going to find a man if she keeps--
 >Lets be fair, nobody really cares, even Berry can barely make it sound interesting.
 >Dash, on the other hand, had already begun clopped over.
 >Loudly, which she only did when she was miffed about something.
 >Oh boy, either you or Berry was in for it.
 >The stool on your right was occupied by a stallion who, last you heard, was about 10 seconds from sealing a deal of his own.
 >Shame he was about to be evicted by Dash.
 >She said something not quite loud enough for you to hear over Berry's blabbering.
 >But whomever the mare he was with was gasped and stormed off, stallion on her tail swearing up and down he never did whatever "that" was.
 >Their night ruined, the stool was free and Dash managed to compose herself before hopping on it.
 >Just as Berry began to move closer to give you a sloppy drunk kiss, Dash pushed her hoof into your chest and shoved you back.
 >Berry Punch nearly face-planted on the counter but you caught her shoulder before she stumbled forward.
 >"Hey. Berry Punch! Anon, you didn't tell me you knew her, what are you guys talking about?"
 >She smiled that shit-eating grin of hers and took a sip of a fresh mug of cider.
 >Berry frowned and narrowed her eyes.
 >"It's a conversation between A and B.."
 >She pointed to herself and you with her hoof.
 >"...so why don't you see yourself out!"
 >Dash chuckled and closed her eyes.
 >God you liked when she was being a bitch.
 >"Ahahaha, good one, Berry! That was funny back when I was 10, got anymore?"
 >Berry nearly growled and you felt her hoof leave your thigh to do who knows what.
 >But you didn't want this to escalate, so you squeezed the hand on her shoulder and shook your head.
 "Dash was meeting me here tonight, Berry. Sorry I didn't say something sooner, but I was really enjoying listening to you talk about...that stuff with your sister."
 >Bless the souls who discovered alcohol, for she was far enough along where that worked.
 >Berry smiled widely and whispered something into your ear.
 >When she pulled away, you were a little flushed and something stirred in your pants.
 >Drunk or not she knew how to push your buttons.
 >"I'll leave you two then, Anon if you're not busy later I'll leave my door unlocked~"
 >She slid off her stool and wobbled to the exit
 >But not before giving Dash a dirty look and brushing her tail against your rear.
 >Dash waved, still wearing that 'go fuck yourself!' grin and laughed when the door to the bar slammed.
 >"She looked pissed!"
 "Sure did, but she just made your life a lot harder."
 >You took a long drink of your cider to cool yourself off while Dash protested.
 >"Oh come ooooon, Anon! You'd really go hit that when you got me?"
 >She flashed her magenta eyes and leaned closer.
 "I don't know. She wasn't rude and pushy like you are."
 >You grinned evilly as Dash flushed red and nearly yelled at you.
 >But she bit her lip and grimaced, shouting something at the barkeep.
 >A minute later a shot was placed in front of you.
 >First of many, you wagered.
 >"Come on, don't be a dork and back out!"
 "I've never said no to free liquor in my life."
 >You took the shot like a champ and put the empty glass down.
 >The amber liquor was smooth and gave a pleasant burn all the way down.
 "Was that 'Rock Hill Farms'?"
 >"Yup! Only the best for a classy guy like you!"
 >She smiled seductively and pulled the same hoof on thigh move Berry did a minute ago.
 >You slyly pushed the empty shot glass toward her.
 >"Oh for fuck's---that was single malt! You should be eating out of my trough!"
 "I'm not some cheap floozy you can buy off!"
 >You fake huffed and turned your head away.
 >Then slightly edged the glass nearer to her.
 >"Alright alright....Bartender! Another one!"
 >The stuff was really strong because that second shot definitely pushed you into tipsy territory.
 >Dash, however, was very gradually sipping her mug, determined to win whatever it was this bet meant she won.
 >Last you checked, the two outcomes were you got drunk for free then stumbled into Berry's house and got laid.
 >Or you got Dash to 'seduce' you and potentially get you laid.
 >Win-fucking-win.
 >"You know what? Anon, this is dumb....and you're right...."
 >She brought you out of your thoughts, and you watched as she turned away.
 >Her hoof left your thigh and she pouted, staring at her reflection in the fizzy cider.
 >"I'm not that awesome, I get rejected all the time..."
 >She sighed and brought the mug to her mouth for a long gulp.
 >You watched and the beginnings of concern crept into your mind.
 >"Half the colts in town think I'm only into girls and the other...well they're jerks!"
 >She put her mug down and looked like she was about to cry.
 >"It's not fair, Anon....I want someone to treat me better than a mare to brag about to their buddies...someone who can be my friend and still make me feel special..."
 >She turned back toward you, eyes slightly misty, and forced a small smile.
 >"Someone...someone like you, Anon."
 >You smiled back, her's brightening when you reached your hand toward her hoof.
 >Only for it to turn into a look of utter shock when you swiftly darted to the shotglass and pushed to back to her.
 >"WHAT?! Are you freaking kidding me!?"
 >She was practically airborne her wings flapped so angrily.
 >A few of the nearby patrons looked toward her with a little surprise.
 >You could only grin.
 "You used the same routine on Twilight two days ago. I was sitting right there with Big Mac and Thunderlane."
 >"Talking about who sucks the most cock, I bet!"
 >You proudly point at the shotglass and she begrudgingly calls over the bartender for your third victory shot.
 >As he brings it over, you couldn't help yourself
 "So how was it?"
 >"How was what?"
 "Princess Pus--"
 >She belts you right in the arm for that one.
 >"We just cuddled, for the record!  It was a rough night and I didn't want to sleep alone!"
 "Whatever you say, Dashie."
 >That nearly earned you another shot to the arm but she paused when you lifted the shotglass to your lips.
 >Even Dash knows better than to spill liquor.
 >You barely feel the third shot, a tell tale sign you should slow down or stop altogether.
 >Best not to gloat then, the more you push her the more she'll try and the more you'll have to drink.
 >So, of course, you gloated like an asshole.
 "You know what the best tasting liquor is?"
 >Dash mumbled something about your sister's ass but you continued.
 "Free liquor!"
 >"Yea whatever! I'm not licked yet!"
 "And I'm not.....as drunk as I could be!"
 >Hope she didn't see you gripping the bartop for support there.
 >Ah crap, she smiled, she noticed.
 >Hang in there, Anon!
 >She pushed a lock of multicolored hair from her face and flashed bedroom eyes as she leaned a little closer.
 >"You know you're going to lose."
 >You hiccuped and coughed to try and hide it.
 >If you knew you'd be hitting the sauce this hard you wouldn't have had all that cider beforehand.
 >You feel her hoof return to your thigh, rubbing slowly toward your crotch.
 >"If you just admit I'm hot and awesome now, maybe you won't end up puking later."
 >She winked and you felt a familiar stirring from below.
 >"So come on, Anon, what do you say? Just admit it, you'd kill to have me for---oops!"
 >She pushed something off the countertop, you couldn't tell what, but she already hopped off her stool to get it.
 >"I'm such a clutz when I drink!"
 >You used this as an excuse to flag the bartender down and get an ice water.
 >"Where did it go? Anon, help me look?"
 >The cool moisture on the outside of the glass felt just as good as the cold liquid down your throat.
 >Don't look, Anon, don't look.
 >"Anooooon~ Come on, don't be a jerk, it's hard to see down here!"
 >Don't look, don't....
 >Dammit, you looked.
 >Dash's extremely toned and tight rear was presented directly in your field of vision, her tail teasing her left flank as she feigned looking around.
 >It swayed back and forth as her head bobbed up and down.
 >When she turned around and saw you blushing, a grin spread on her face.
 >You were forced to adjust your pants and take another gulp of ice water.
 >Because no matter what you told your eyes to do, they refused to stop staring at her ass.
 >She even opened her wings, her knowing full well you complimented them more often than you'd like to admit.
 >Something about them made her so much more appealing than the other types of ponies and anytime you had one too many you'd tell her so.
 >You swallowed the last of the water, chewing on an icecube while cursing yourself for being snared in such an obvious trap.
 >You'd be a liar if you said you didn't spend a lonely night or two imagining what it would feel like to rut that toned butt till she screamed your name.
 >She probably caught you looking before, maybe not even at her rear, but at other ponies.
 >So she knew it was your kryptonite, especially after three shots and who knows how much cider.
 >Still grinning, she picked up an coaster and climbed back on her stool, satisfied with her work.
 >"There it is, I thought I'd NEVER find it!"
 "Yea....crazy how things get lost."
 >Your leg tensed when she put her hoof back on it.
 >More grinning and bedroom eyes from your pegasus companion.
 >"Shame I had to stop looking, right Anon?"
 >You could feel her breath on your ear.
 >She was going all out.
 >If you admitted you wanted her to keep looking, did that constitute a win?
 >Would she stop being sexy and do a victory dance in the bar, going back to the tomboyish Dash you were used to?
 >You pushed the shotglass back to her, indicating you weren't falling for this routine either.
 >But Dash didn't get angry this time.
 >She only licked her lips and ordered another.
 >She knew you were faltering.
 >You did too.
 >The only thing you didn't know is if she realized the only reason you didn't admit defeat right then and there was because you didn't want her to stop.
 >Two shots arrived this time, and she put one in her hoof as she pushed the other toward you.
 >"Do one with me, Anon~"
 >Oh fuck.
 >She lifts the shotglass and nods for you to do the same.
 >"What should we toast to, hmmm?"
 >She's practically sitting in your lap as she asks, her cheeks slightly red.
 >She blinks her eyes seductively and you feel the tip of her wing brush ever so slightly against your back.
 "Umm...I..."
 >Come on, think of something so you don't sound like a scrub!
 >"I know!"
 >Thank god
 >"Lets toast to finding things you thought you lost."
 >She winked again and you knew you must be beet red because she giggled.
 >A girly giggle too, not her usual harsh, almost mocking laugh you'd grown to like over the past few months.
 "Cheers"
 >You managed as you clinked the glass to hers.
 >This wasn't the same bourbon from before, it was actually something sweeter.
 >You downed it in a flash, fourth shot in the last twenty minutes, it might as well have been water.
 >Dash opted to slowly pour her's down her throat.
 >You watched with hunger in your eyes, biting your lower lip as you saw a bit of her tongue lick the rim of the glass.
 >She closed her eyes and swallowed the entire thing in one long, flirtatious motion, half opening her eyes to look back at you.
 >"See something you like, Anon?~"
 >She pulled herself even closer, her lips practically an inch from yours.
 >The liquor was some sort of vodka, but flavored, so even her breath was pleasant.
 >Not like the bottomshelf brewery from Berry's earlier.
 >"Soooooo, is it safe to to say--"
 >Maybe it was the liquor, maybe it was months of silently wishing for this while keeping up your brash and uninterested front.
 >But something shot a bolt of lighting into you at that very moment, and before she finished, you pulled her closer and kissed her right then and there.
 >It was the kind of kiss you'd expect after a long night of drinking, sloppy, uncoordinated and hardly your best.
 >Even so, she didn't resist
 >Quite the contrary, she kissed back, her eyes closing with yours and her hooves wrapping behind your neck.
 >She left her stool and was pressed into your lap, quickly asserting dominance over your mouth.
 >Both your lips parted, some mutual flash of understanding and your tongues began a mix of dancing and fighting for control of a battle neither of you would admit you were fighting.
 >She was strong, athletic, powerful, but still a small pony in the arms of a full grown man, and you easily found yourself back on top, so to speak.
 >Maybe that's what she liked?
 >Someone who didn't rival her own skills but still was powerful enough to make her feel like a mare?
 >You'd wonder about that later, right now your hand drifted south and grabbed a handful of her cutie mark.
 >Her wings opened wide, nearly knocking the pair of shotglasses off the counter as the kiss continued and she struggled to regain control.
 >A few nearby patrons hooted or expressed their distaste, but neither of you noticed or cared
 >If anything, it emboldened you two to continue, the rest of the world silently flipped by your unleashed passion.
 >So you kissed, longer than you ever imagined you would, and only when you finally need air did your lips separate.
 >You both were panting, cheeks flushed with intoxication.
 >"...I win..."
 >She managed, her lips curling into a smile.
 "Yea...you did..."
 >No gloating followed, or a sudden change of mood, or even a 'that was nice, but...'
 >Just an unspoken understanding of what was going to happen next, her eyes and yours saying more in that instant than any amount of words or courting ever could.
 "So.....your place or--"
 >"Your place, you have a bigger bed."
 "OK"
 >"Race you there! Pay for the shots!"
 >She made a beeline for the door, nearly knocking over a waitress in the process.
 >She would stick you with the bill after that
 >Oh well, you lost the bet, right?
 >You clumsily fumbled in your pockets for any bits you had to pay the enormous tab you two racked up.
 >When you finally managed to move your hardon out of the way to fit your hand into your pocket, you threw every bit you had down on the counter
 >Hoping it was enough and the bartender would understand, you awkwardly ran after her.
 >You only lived a few blocks from the bar, Ponyville wasn't a very big place after all.
 >She was probably already there and climbing through a window.
 >As you huffed and puffed, trying not to let the haze of booze keep you from your goal
 >A thought crept into your mind
 "DASH!"
 >You drunkenly yelled down the block, not even caring if she heard you or not.
 "How the hell do you know what my bed is like?!"
 >You heard her laughing in the distance and it got you running faster.
 >"Come on, where's that human stamina I heard so much about?"
 >She mocked from above your house
 >You couldn't see int he dark but you knew she was getting a kick out of how funny you were running
 >Oh keep gloating, you thought.
 >Between the whiskey dick and the months of pent up frustration, she'd be lucky if she even could walk when you were done with her.
 
 ~ End