SHOW:
|
|
- or go back to the newest paste.
| 1 | Pussy Liquor | |
| 2 | ||
| 3 | We'd like to thank you for joining the Pussy Liquors Foundation. We extend very few job offers, so we deeply appreciate every potential employee who accepts our offer. | |
| 4 | ||
| 5 | The PLF is a covert, extragovernmental agency that has conclusively proved the existence of non-human sapients, and has successfully enlisted several of them as protectors of humanity. While these individuals possess abilities far beyond those of ordinary humans (including magic, shapeshifting, and superhuman physical capabilities), we possess too few of them to justify their direct deployment in combat situations - and some have refused or resisted training efforts. | |
| 6 | ||
| 7 | Thus, the PLF has developed a method of distilling their unique characteristics into otherwise ordinary human agents (you) - through a process developed by a particularly lewd sorcerer, the females of these amazing species have their body chemistries subtly altered, and human subjects who perform cunnilingus on them will gain a diminished form of these abilities - and few, if any, of their weaknesses. | |
| 8 | ||
| 9 | While the women (codenamed honeypot agents) largely enjoy this process - as do a nontrivial portion of our human agents - we do not do it for fun. The PLF is concerned with serving humanity's interests, from keeping the world safe from malevolent entities borne of other worlds and universes, to securing supernatural items for study and use. | |
| 10 | ||
| 11 | As a PLF field agent, you are to go on missions - largely of your own choosing - for the betterment of humanity, while being empowered through licking the pussies of our honeypot agents. The standard package for field agents is one pussy eating session at the time your employment begins, and one additional session after every successful mission. Please be aware that when agents do their jobs successfully, humanity finds itself without need of protection, so we cannot guarantee that you will have missions to go on 100% of the time; do not plan on being able to eventually get every superpower we can offer. Your monetary compensation will continue to be sent to you regardless, for as long as you remain employed with us. | |
| 12 | ||
| 13 | Please note you will have full access to the bodies of whichever honeypot agent you select during these times, and may perform non-cunnilingus acts as you or they wish; the encounter does not end until you've eaten enough pussy for an inhuman trait to manifest. | |
| 14 | However, humanity's relationship with these species is often fragile, or young, and as such, misbehavior (including offensive violence and initiation of sex acts unwanted by the women) during these meetings will result in strict disciplinary measures, often including termination. Of course, if she wants it, that's another story. We encourage you to do your best to please, both for their sake, and for the sake of humanity at large. | |
| 15 | ||
| 16 | Oh, and despite our group's name, the vaginal fluids of our honeypot agents are not alcoholic in nature. It's just a pun. | |
| 17 | ||
| 18 | ||
| 19 | ||
| 20 | YOU GO ON ANY MISSIONS CHOSEN IMMEDIATELY. REWARDS ARE GAINED *AFTER* COMPLETING THEM, EXCEPT FOR THE SERVITUDE MISSIONS. THEY GIVE REWARDS IMMEDIATELY, AND CAN BE INTERRUPTED FOR OTHER MISSIONS - THOUGH YOU HAVE TO COME BACK AND FINISH THEM AFTERWARDS. | |
| 21 | ||
| 22 | Missions: | |
| 23 | Servitude - Pick a species of available honeypot. You will be sent to live with a woman of this species, whom you must obey without even a shred of defiance for 500 days. You will be implanted with an enchanted, high-tech device that makes you powerless to oppose them; your muscles will fail to carry out actions that will harm them, and any harmful magical abilities you have will pass over them without effect. The foundation makes no promises for how abusive or tyrannical the girl may or may not be, and will not interfere on your behalf; they can do whatever they want with you, and that's part of how we convince the girls to work for us in the first place. How the girls respond to such power will vary; they might just treat you like a friend who helps with their housework, or they might leave you a broken shell of a man, or worse. You are released temporarily to go on other missions (except other servitude missions), but you still need to hit 500 total days of actual servitude to finish this mission. Choose wisely. You can take this mission as many times as you like, and can even be sent back to a specific individual you served before, on your request. | |
| 24 | ||
| 25 | Extended Servitude - The same, but for the rest of your life. We recommend trying out a girl with the shorter variant before this, but if this sort of thing appeals to you, you're welcome to jump right to lifelong slavery, you freak. We'll give you four sessions with honeypot agents for this, but it obviously locks off any further servitude missions. | |
| 26 | ||
| 27 | The King of Fear - There is an entity - a very, very powerful one - who pops up in various worlds from time to time. He is empowered by fear, filled with malice, and bent on destruction. Worlds conquered by this being are filled with endless terror and despair that magic and even psionics utterly fail to change. With the various instruments and channels of magical knowledge we have access to, we've determined that he will arrive on Earth, within a few years, somewhere in a relatively small region. We have access to a means of summoning him prematurely, and are planning on using it to ambush him as a group once we have enough volunteers. We expect casualties regardless. We can't tell you what he'll look like or be capable of when he gets here - that always changes - but this isn't his first visit to Earth, and he's always proven to be killable somehow. Usually in combat, believe it or not. Death doesn't stop him for more than a few decades, and he only has to beat humanity once to doom us for eternity, but as powerful as he is, he's not invincible. Still, the foundation urges you to take this mission seriously, and not take it until you are experienced as an agent, and empowered by honeypots of several species. | |
| 28 | ||
| 29 | Devil Army - Demons borne of the minds of all sapient species in the multiverse are massing, planning to come to the material plane and try to destroy the human race. This force is only a minority of every demon that exists, and based on our estimates of the army's size, the conventional military forces of the world will be able to defeat them, but not without catastrophic cost in human lives, plus we'd like to keep the existence of magic, demons, and other worlds a secret from the general public. Be aware that we rate the average PLF field agent as being nearly 100x stronger than the average demon - but this army is comprised of thousands. If you take this mission, we'll dispatch you to a battlefield in their home dimension. Neutralize the army of demons, down to the last man. Take this mission if you are prepared for group combat against a large number of foes who are less powerful than you are. | |
| 30 | ||
| 31 | Alien Invasion - An extraterrestrial race with remarkably advanced technology is planning on annexing Earth for their own purposes within the next five years. Make sure they never get here. You will be transported to one of the ships on the edge of their fleet of 200 in deep space, outfitted with enchantments to make sure you can survive exposure to a vacuum indefinitely, and a gun-like device that generates EMP fields several feet in front of you. Use this, along with your own abilities to sabotage their invasion efforts. This is a stealth/infiltration mission, since executing the three alien generals will grind things to a halt, as will destroying their five flagships; further, a stealthy approach will prevent them from bringing the brunt of their technology to bear against you, makings things significantly easier. You are welcome to try and wipe them all out if you'd prefer, and we will award an extra pussy-eating session for this approach, though it is not recommended; this species has developed a means of firing antimatter, and no cunt juice is gonna save you from being annihilated if that shit hits you. | |
| 32 | ||
| 33 | Find The Dragon Balls - No, not testicles. Seven magic, orange orbs that, when gathered, can grant a wish, using immense magical power. They can only be used once per year, and scatter themselves across the planet after use, so we send an agent to go get these things once a year. We have a device called 'dragon radar' which, under normal circumstances, can pinpoint the balls exactly; but for some reason, this year, it seems to be indicating areas between 10 and 100 miles in diameter. We're not sure what caused this loss of precision; obviously something about Earth's latent magic energy has changed, but we don't know what. Regardless, we want you to take the radar and track down all seven. You're going to go all over the planet on this mission, so it's a plus if you like travel. Don't worry about travel expenses; we'll pay for those. High command has a specific wish in mind, so you will not have access to the ritual that lets you use the balls. Oh, and, being highly prized items of a magical nature, the dragon balls usually have a few treasure hunters, warlocks, and supernatural creatures seeking them out for various reasons. We can't predict exactly what they'll be, but as long as you've licked a superhuman pussy or two they shouldn't pose a problem; they have low power levels. | |
| 34 | ||
| 35 | Rescue Agent Cooper - This one's a favor for the FBI, whom we're trying to develop a mutually beneficial arrangement with. Dale Cooper is an agent of theirs whom they've lost contact with. Intel seems to indicate he ended up in a place of magic and madness called The Black Lodge. We don't know how to get someone out of there, or how to access it, but we do know that it's disconnected from time, space, and logic. So you're going to have to do plenty of investigating, and get heavily involved with mysticism to find a way in. Our best mediums have consistently said Agent Cooper is still alive, so it's not likely to be an extraordinarily dangerous place. Cooper himself is a prodigy at the investigative sciences, and is likely to be well versed in magic by the time he escapes the lodge, so maybe you can call on him for a favor if you get him out of there. | |
| 36 | ||
| 37 | Conquer Eldritch World - We have discovered a number of extraordinarily valuable resources on a planet that does not exist in our dimension. This planet is inhabited by creatures that are most readily understood by comparing them to the works of author HP Lovecraft - at least physically. Mentally, they don't seem very different from most known sapient species - psionics and other mental effects will work as well on them as anyone else. Luckily, none of them exhibit power levels on par with Lovecraft's more terrifying characters like Cthulhu and Yog Sothoth. We want this world under our thumb, and we don't care how. Either neutralize the dominant species, or find some way to make them accept human control. If you can manage to understand their society, simply rising to the top of their political ladder(s?) is entirely possible, and will suffice for our purposes. | |
| 38 | ||
| 39 | Interplanetary Talent Show - Somewhere out there, there is a race of powerful and largely amoral beings called Cromulons who feed off the showmanship of other lifeforms through a mechanism that remains unknown to us. Their usual method of feeding is forcing a number of worlds to participate in an interplanetary talent show, rewarding the victorious world with a selection of advanced Cromulan technology - and vaporizing any planets who performed especially poorly, though they only do this for worlds who were involuntarily signed up. We're entering Earth into the competition willingly. If you choose to take this mission, you'll have to demonstrate something you are exceptionally good at; preferably, a skill you had before joining the PLF, and can somehow enhance with the superpowers you've gained during your time with us. It doesn't matter what kind of show you put on, just make it a good one. Something genuinely impressive. Keep in mind, we have no way of knowing what acts the other participants will put on, so you better bring your 'A' game. And maybe a backup plan in case your act gets ripped off by someone else before you go on stage. | |
| 40 | ||
| 41 | Recruitment - Any organization needs hard workers and talented people to survive; the PLF is no different. If you take this mission, you'll be given a quota of non-human females and mundane field agents to recruit. You may use any means from job fairs and cold calling to telepathy and manipulation - though anyone who signs up with us must do so knowingly and willingly. No lies and no mind control. We offer generous compensation packages for all employees, so recruiting field agents mostly comes down to finding people willing to do the kind of work we need. Recruiting women largely means finding ones with extraordinary abilities that can be bestowed onto agents who eat them out; the recruitment itself usually goes easy since their job is little more than receiving oral sex. | |
| 42 | ||
| 43 | Test Subject - When we receive a honeypot agent of a new species, there are often questions about what precisely field agents will undergo when going down on them, along with concerns about safety and suitability to the PLF's goals. This is where test subjects come in. If you sign up for this, then you're gonna eat a lot of cooch (or do pretty much anything else to it, if you got osmosis), and combinations of cooches, and we have no idea how it'll affect your body or mind. We'll make a record of what your abilities were before testing so we can restore them afterwards using a special ritual devised by the original perv-wizard's apprentice; but in the meantime, you might end up a hideous pile of random body parts with nothing to show for it but some improved cunnilingus skills. Still, this is a job pretty much any agent can do, so it's popular with newbies. | |
| 44 | ||
| 45 | ||
| 46 | PICK ONE SPECIES TO EAT THE PUSSY OF IMMEDIATELY. AFTER EVERY MISSION, RETURN HERE AND PICK ONE MORE, OR PICK A SPECIAL MODIFIER BELOW; YOUR FIRST SELECTION MUST BE FROM THIS MENU HOWEVER. | |
| 47 | ||
| 48 | Honeypots: | |
| 49 | Vampire - You should know what a vampire is. Bloodsucking meta-humans who burn up in sunlight, with their other capabilities and weaknesses differing substantially from telling to telling. Suffice to say, getting our hands on a few has shed some light on what they can actually do. Eating one of these out will make you just a little vampy, letting you sustain yourself with blood (you can still have normal food if you want), slow your aging by around 50%, and hypnotize people via eye contact. You'll also develop a capacity for turning into a bat, and controlling the weather; though you'll need time and practice to get used to those. Applying Double Dribble to this species will cause let you absorb blood through your skin for extra strength and vigor, and let you turn into mist - ideal for pretty much any stealth situation where the target is not specifically expecting a vampire. | |
| 50 | ||
| 51 | Were[animal] - You know werewolves? Yeah, we've not only got a few of them on staff, but it turns out, lycanthropes turning into wolves is exclusive to our universe; for every animal you could think of lycanthropes turning into instead of wolves, there's an alternate world where they do. Pick any animal and we'll get a were- of that creature to rub her cooch in your face until you develop the same condition they have - turning into a superpowered human hybrid of that species by the light of the full moon. We can't summarize the effects here since every animal on the planet is on the table (even ones that don't reproduce sexually; their human components will give them genitals they can use to empower you all the same), so just use your judgement for what this will let you do. Keep in mind, while all were-state have incredible strength and durability, and unlike a proper were- you'll maintain your human mind, your access to that form will be limited to a few hours for one night out of every lunar cycle; it's powerful, but it's not reliable. Also note that you can't deactivate a were-form; it has to run its full course. | |
| 52 | ||
| 53 | Dragon - Scaly reptiles who breathe fire. Depending on the individual, they may or may not be humanoid, or possess wings. | |
| 54 | ||
| 55 | fire breath, scales, lifespan | |
| 56 | ||
| 57 | ||
| 58 | Orc - strength, green skin, sharp teeth, hardiness | |
| 59 | Shokan - four arms, fire magic, strength | |
| 60 | Gem - holographic body, learn shapeshifting and object creation, lifespan | |
| 61 | Saiyan - ki, monkey tail, learn flight | |
| 62 | Zilla - atomic breath, extra height, back spines | |
| 63 | Succubus - everyone wants you, more manly/girly, dark magic | |
| 64 | Cerberus - three heads, fur, sharp teeth | |
| 65 | Gorgon - gaze attack, snake hair, snake tail | |
| 66 | Oni - ki, strength, red skin, horns | |
| 67 | Shadow (SMT) - emotion-activated super form | |
| 68 | Esper - psionics, intelligence, crazy hair/eye color | |
| 69 | Zombie - resurrection, resurrecting bite | |
| 70 | Ghost - flight, intangibility, learn ghost tricks like possession and invisibility | |
| 71 | Xenomorph - black carapace, claws, sharp teeth, acid blood, bloodlust | |
| 72 | Sonic - speed, quills, squat body | |
| 73 | Siren - mind-control, fins, super swimming, flight | |
| 74 | Leprechaun - luck, magic, wish | |
| 75 | Unicorn - magic, horn, fur, hooves | |
| 76 | Cthulhu - madness, magic, tentacles | |
| 77 | Scylla - tentacles, intelligence, color changing | |
| 78 | Angel - healing, halo, flight, intelligence | |
| 79 | Yeti - strength, fur, ice magic, lifespan | |
| 80 | Mermaid - super swimming, scales, water magic | |
| 81 | Phoenix - fire magic, flight, resurrection | |
| 82 | Dryad - commune with nature, hardiness, healing | |
| 83 | Onryo - bloodlust, prehensile hair, ki | |
| 84 | Fairy - flight, magic | |
| 85 | ||
| 86 | Special Modifiers: | |
| 87 | ||
| 88 | Altered State: You must have been empowered by at least one were- to pick this. Pick one: for six hours every day you'll be in your were-state, for one week out of every month you'll be in your were-state, for three months of the year you'll be in your were-state. Be aware that you still cannot turn off your were-state. | |
| 89 | ||
| 90 | Pure Nectars - you have the powers of all the girls you chose, but the appearance of only one, and are essentially a member of that species w/ extra powers | |
| 91 | ||
| 92 | Fit In - A device that activates a portal to a world where everyone is whatever species you are. | |
| 93 | ||
| 94 | Designer Drinks - pick and choose unique elements of all the girls you choose, and only gain those | |
| 95 | ||
| 96 | Double Dribble - get a second dose from any species you've already gotten one dose from to strengthen the effects. | |
| 97 | ||
| 98 | Expedite Servitude - the duration of servitude missions is reduced to six months. No effect on extended servitude. | |
| 99 | ||
| 100 | Osmosis - instead of just cunnilingus, any prolonged contact with the genitals of a meta-human who's gone through the process will grant you powers | |
| 101 | ||
| 102 | Y not? - we'll send you to an alternate reality where the equivalent of the PLF's honeypots are all men, futas, or cuntboys. Your choice. |