PINARY 056

Bill Cipher: [**WELCOME TO PROJECT BINARY AI V 0.1.0**]
Bill Cipher: [**PLEASE INPUT COMMAND https://etherpad.net/p/Pinary**]
Erelye: /game 1
Bill Cipher: [INPUT: /game 1]
Bill Cipher: [OUTPUT: Begin JEFF THE SCIENTIST.]
Bill Cipher: [JEFF THE SCIENTIST: NEW GAME >CONTINUE< OPTIONS QUIT]
Erelye: > Continue.
Bill Cipher: [> CONTINUE <]
Bill Cipher: [...The recent past is recalled...]
Bill Cipher: [You are Jeff Mason, a scientist at Aperture Science. Today is the big day - Project Binary, the artificial intelligence you and everyone else have been building, under the strict supervision of the Advanced Superiors, is going to be turned on. But in the meantime, you've found yourself on the wrong side of the Superiors, and they're out to kill you. You've retreated to Old Aperture, the facility below yours, with Interrobang, the tenth Superior. You're in a series of test chambers called Project Seven-X-Seven, using various tools to find your way through.]
Bill Cipher: [> Please input commands.]
Erelye: Look to the next test chamber door to enter. I believe it was five, yes?
Bill Cipher: [DOOR 5 is inscribed with a BACKSLASH and depicts a stick figure holding some kind of sharp weapon. He is surrounded with a diamond-like aura.]
Erelye: Enter.
Bill Cipher: [You head through DOOR 5. It closes behind you. You feel weightless for a brief second as a TEST CHAMBER generates itself around you. A transmission starts up.]
Bill Cipher: ["The lab monkeys told me that we needed to make sure all the test subjects were physically fit before dropping them into test courses at the speed of someone falling down a vertical drop. So I finally got around to making one... five test courses in. Listen, us at Aperture have a strict schedule. We need to make sure we can bend reality as much as possible within a limited timeframe, so making sure the bones of the torchbearers don't snap is buried under far too much paperwork for playing God. Right? Right. Now, anyway."]
Bill Cipher: ["This course is all about parkour. Leaps of faith. Navigation. And we decided to introduce a new layer to the whole thing, which you'll see in a few rooms. Not giving any hints! Just something to look foward to."]
Bill Cipher: ["Pick up the object directly in front of you. Standard procedure, right? Right."]
Bill Cipher: [The transmission ends.]
Erelye: Pick up the object directly in from of us. Especially if it doesn't appear to be there.
Bill Cipher: [You walk forward. There is no OBJECT directly in front of you. What there is, however, is a HATCH OF THE DIAMONDS built into the panelled ground. It shimmers with a pink light that's becoming familiar to you, and lets out a screech every time it does so that fades into a whimper after a few seconds.]
Erelye: Is that what they're calling these things now?
Erelye: Look for a handle or latch in the center of the thing.
Bill Cipher: [You find a HANDLE in the device's exact center.]
Erelye: Twist it, and pull upwards.
Bill Cipher: [You twist the HANDLE, pulling the HATCH OF THE DIAMONDS upwards. Sealed inside of the HATCH, and now ready for you to take, is the handle of what seems to be a weapon. There is a hollow pocket at the center of the handle's cross-guard that is diamond-like in shape.]
Erelye: Remove weapon, likely some sort of hard-light bladed sword.
Bill Cipher: [You take the handle. The HATCH OF THE DIAMOND sinks back into the ground with a hiss.]
Erelye: See, that's the extra feature that these devices need. I really don't like how they just stick out for eternity after you use them. In any case, observe weapon.
Bill Cipher: [It's literally a handle.]
Erelye: Keep both ends of handle from body, and touch hollow pocket.
Bill Cipher: [You touch the hollow pocket of the handle. Nothing happens.]
Erelye: Hmm. Swing handle, keeping both ends away from any vital organs.
Bill Cipher: [You swing the handle. Nothing happens.]
Bill Cipher: [It is of note that at the end of every course of TEST CHAMBERS, you acquire an item meant to help you with the next course.]
Erelye: Very well. Observe surroundings.
Bill Cipher: [You observe TEST CHAMBER \\-01. It is comprised of a series of platforms floating across a seemingly infinite abyss. They are all too far to jump across. At the very far end of the CHAMBER is the EXIT DOOR, which can be accessed via a stable platform built into the wall, that is not floating.]
Erelye: You'll want two backslashes.
Erelye: Alright. So, have faith. I'd presume we'll be drifting here.
Bill Cipher: [DRIFT? You've never heard of such a concept.]
Bill Cipher: [Though when you think upon that word, something in your pocket... vibrates.]
Erelye: What thing, precisely?
Bill Cipher: [The GEM CORE.]
Erelye: Of course. I'm an idiot. Plug that into the hollow pocket.
Erelye: Hah, that makes the Gem Core an isocrystal. Nice.
Bill Cipher: [You fit the GEM CORE into the handle. Immediately, the handle vibrates intensely. The GEM CORE lights up, its surface flickering between various colors before settling on an uneasy mix of pink, yellow, cyan, and white. Forged from thin air, a luminescent blade carves its way into existence from the handle. You swing the blade experimentally. It carves a luminous arc through the air.]
Bill Cipher: [You got the APERTURE SCIENCE HYPER LIGHT DRIFTER.]
Erelye: AS-brand isoblade. Nice.
Bill Cipher: [Subtlety? What's that??]
Erelye: No idea. To do that, you'd probably have to scatter monoliths around this place, and have them all translated in a Lιbrary, or something.
Erelye: In any case, experimentally dodge toward the entry door and back, isoblade in hand.
Erelye: Do not jump off edges of any sort.
Bill Cipher: [You lunge forward with the HYPER LIGHT DRIFTER in hand, towards the ENTRY DOOR. Your entire body floats through a sea of flashing colors, a kaleidoscopic haze permeating your vision. You find yourself directly in front of the ENTRY DOOR. It seems you've fast-traveled, or, DRIFTED, a fairly far distance in a fraction of the time necessary to walk said distance.]
Erelye: Fascinating.
Erelye: Drift to the first platform. It might fall with our landing upon it, so attempt to drift all the way to the stable exit platform without end.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT across all the floating platforms. It takes a good amount of effort to steer yourself across them, and when you eventually make it to the EXIT DOOR, you feel quite dizzy. Regardless, the EXIT DOOR opens.]
Erelye: Enter.
Bill Cipher: [You enter TEST CHAMBER \\-02. A transmission starts up.]
Bill Cipher: ["So, you've got your hands on the Hyper Light Drifter. Aperture Science was never really one for strict weaponry. We just make implements. Tools! Like shower curtains. But some outside benefactors convinced us that making this thing was a great use of our time. And it is! The gem cores were a pain in the *ass* to get - even worse than moon dust - but boy, are they worth it. Sure, the refinery process is tricky, and liquefying the powder into a flammable biohazard took an entire lab's worth of research, but look what we have now!"]
Bill Cipher: ["Anyway - this is just another tutorial before we drop you into the *real* thing, so. Break a leg! But don't actually. We need you alive."]
Bill Cipher: [The transmission ends.]
Erelye: Alas. If Aperture hadn't been destroyed in the epilogue, I definitely would've given them some tips on how to manufacture some of this stuff efficiently and easily. Anyhow, look about.
Bill Cipher: [You examine TEST CHAMBER \-02. There is a marginal pit with a single floating platform hovering above it. On the platform is a SWITCH. The rest of the chamber is made of a hallway extending all the way down to the EXIT DOOR. The EXIT DOOR appears to be unlit.]
Erelye: Alright. We'll have to pull the switch to activate the door, obviously. Are we still dizzy?
SplitSuns: > drift to platform
Bill Cipher: [You're fine now. You DRIFT to the platform with the SWITCH and press the button on top of it.]
Bill Cipher: [The EXIT DOOR lights up. The chamber begins to shake, as, suddenly, floating blocks appear out of the walls in the narrow hallway, sliding back and forth with thuds. You'll need to time your DRIFTS to get past them.]
Erelye: Hmm. Do the blocks look to be particularly destructible?
SplitSuns: they're probably like those sliding blocks in the north
Erelye: Likely, yes.
Bill Cipher: [The SLIDING BLOCKS look incredibly sturdy.]
Erelye: Can we make it to the very edge of the hall without being crushed to death, or is there a block right at the start.
Bill Cipher: [You can DRIFT to the beginning of the hallway.]
Erelye: Do so.
Bill Cipher: [You do so.]
SplitSuns: > is it safe to move forward
Erelye: Memorize the timings of the blocks, and prepare a plan to the rhythm of the smashing.
Pope Cipurr: >Practice drifting consecutively within confines of room
Pope Cipurr: given that i'm fairly certain we don't have our usual extended drift...
Bill Cipher: [You practice DRIFTING consecutively with the narrow space that you have. It's fairly tricky, but you get the hang of it eventually. You can now DRIFT several times in quick succession with minimal effort, fighting past the dizziness.]
SplitSuns: oh cool
Erelye: Hmm. Prepare to drift through the blocks to their rhythm perfectly. Let's save the vomiting blood and pink goo for after this chamber.
SplitSuns: kek
Erelye: If we are ready, go.
Bill Cipher: [You analyze the rhythm of the SLIDING BLOCKS. After several seconds of standing still, you see an opening, abruptly DRIFTING forward at hyperspeed. You find yourself sliding to a halt in front of the EXIT DOOR.]
SplitSuns: > go through
Bill Cipher: [You enter TEST CHAMBER \\-03. A transmission starts up.]
Bill Cipher: ["Alright! Let's get to the good stuff. You can't tell, but I'm rubbing my hands together excitedly. This test is pretty simple. So simple, even a child could understand the premise. Whether they'd pass the test is a different matter. Any other time you've been presented with a combat scenario at this point - with the exception of the Turrets - it was purely accidental. I'm delighted to inform you that this time, it's on purpose."]
Pope Cipurr: good thing we practiced
Bill Cipher: ["The goal is to survive."]
Bill Cipher: [The transmission ends.]
Erelye: Ready isoblade.
Bill Cipher: [There is a massive rumbling throughout the room.]
Bill Cipher: [Do you examine the room in the short time you have to do so without danger?]
SplitSuns: yes
Erelye: Yes.
Bill Cipher: [You examine TEST CHAMBER \\-03. It is a massive cubic room with a large amount of space. The floor appears to be made of CONCENTRIC SQUARES, which divides the room into medium-sized tiles. Various sets TUBES jut out of the walls.]
Erelye: Is this just the South arena room.
SplitSuns: no spoilers pls
Bill Cipher: [Immediately after taking this all in, three of the TUBES pop open. Entities fall out of them. You are attacked by TURRET DROIDS.]
Erelye: Allow me to handle this one. I've got this. Clearly.
SplitSuns: can our sword deflect projectiles
Bill Cipher: [The only way to find out is to risk death.]
SplitSuns: let's not, then
Bill Cipher: [Speaking of risking death, the TURRET DROIDS advance on their actual legs.]
Erelye: Drift around the droids, and stab the first one directly in the back-analogue. Then, drift backwards for a moment, spearing another droid through on the travel.
Erelye: Let's see if these things bleed cyanic mechanovitae.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT around the three TURRET DROIDS, whipping out the HYPER LIGHT DRIFTER and stabbing one of them in the back. The DROID screams, oil and sparks spewing out of their body. They start babbling incoherently, their arms shifting into machine guns and turning around to face you. You quickly DRIFT backwards, stabbing another DROID while doing so. You slice their arm off.]
Bill Cipher: [The three DROIDS all fire rounds of ammunition at you. You have two seconds to dodge.]
Erelye: Drift out of the way.
SplitSuns: take a leaf out of picolo's book and DODGE
Erelye: Hmm. Do we have shield drift, actually?
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT, and keep DRIFTING. The DROIDS seem to be capable of tracking your movements, even through hyperspace. Eventually, they stop firing.]
Bill Cipher: [The third TURRET DROID runs directly towards you. Their arms turn into blades.]
SplitSuns: oh
Erelye: Drift backwards.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT backwards. They still advance.]
Bill Cipher: ((need to go for a bit. I'll be back. /afk))
Erelye: Goad droids into all stabbing, drifting away at the last second to avoid being hit. Then, swing isoblade backwards in an attempt to create some sort of charged strike directly through the torsos of the droids. If this fails, just do a regular strike through them all.
Erelye: /AFK as well.
Erelye: /UNAFK.
Bill Cipher: [You try this strategy. However, neither of the other DROIDS decide to actually go and stab you, leaving you with the third DROID, which is still on your back.]
Erelye: Can we attempt the same strategy with a single droid, or would we be taken out by the other two.
Bill Cipher: [You could try.]
Erelye: Very well. Attempt this strategy. If there is any chance of being struck whatsoever, pull out with a few drifts.
Bill Cipher: [You stand your ground as the DROID prepares to lunge directly at you. Instead, you DRIFT backwards, pulling out your HYPER LIGHT DRIFTER behind you. The blade curves in a luminous arc, much like before, bisecting the DROID. It is motionless. The other two DROIDS prepare to open fire once more.]
Erelye: Drift to the very edge of the droid fire, when it occurs, and attempt to deflect a shot or two from the safety of barely being out of range.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT to the very edge of the room. The CONCENTRIC PLATFORM you're on suddenly reverberates with an unpleasant noise, and its patterns begin to blink red. You try to deflect a shot or two, but the TURRET AMMUNITION merely passes through your blade, and actually seems to be superheated in the process.]
Erelye: That's an answer, then.
Erelye: Drift back toward droids, with intent to incite melee strikes. Drift out of the way of these moments before they occur, waiting for isoblade to cool down.
Bill Cipher: [Your blade wasn't what was superheated - the AMMUNITION was.]
Erelye: Ah.
Bill Cipher: [You drift in front of the TURRET DROIDS. Both of them engage MELEE MODE. You DRIFT out of the way moments before they strike.]
Erelye: Take the sort of recoil time to bisect a droid at worst, and decapitate it at best, removing what could be considered a head or central processor.
Bill Cipher: [You decapitate a TURRET DROID. They have fully functioning bodies that resemble those of humans. Still very robotic, though.]
Bill Cipher: [The remaining TURRET DROID's red eye starts blinking hysterically. A glowing red ball forms in front of its head.]
Erelye: Do we have the time to murder it before something occurs? If not, drift out of the way as swiftly as we can.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT out of the way. A piercing laser beam blasts through the arena. The CONCENTRIC PLATFORM you were on earlier falls into the abyss. The entire outer ring of PLATFORMS do the same.]
SplitSuns: oh
Erelye: Immediately drift directly around the droid, slashing through droid as many times as we can in the process. If we are endangered by this at any point, drift away.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT and slash repeatedly, turning the DROID into nothing but bits and pieces.]
Bill Cipher: [More TUBES open up. Even more figures fly out of them.]
Bill Cipher: [You are attacked by two DIRK STRIDERS.]
Bill Cipher: ((I want to die))
Erelye: Hah.
crystalcat: Snerk.
SplitSuns: hold the fuck up
SplitSuns: are the enemies in hld called dirks
Erelye: Yes.
Erelye: The green ones.
SplitSuns: kill me
crystalcat: Later.
Erelye: "We go off of *XIV - Temperance*, and attempt to bond with the dirks in a brotherly fashion, breaking into the next chamber."
Bill Cipher: [You talk to the DIRK STRIDERS with an air of TEMPERANCE about you.]
Bill Cipher: [They seem pleased with your actions.]
Bill Cipher: [The EXIT DOOR lights up and opens.]
Bill Cipher: []
Erelye: Oh, nice.
Bill Cipher: [You snap out of your daydream.]
Erelye: Hah.
Bill Cipher: [The DIRK STRIDERS are staring uneasily at you.]
Bill Cipher: [In a few moments, they will most likely be ready to attack.]
SplitSuns: > observe dirk striders
Erelye: Let's try to use mercy. I don't want to kill them.
SplitSuns: what do they look like
Bill Cipher: [The DIRK STRIDERS look like standard DIRKS, but with POINTY SHADES and ROBOTIC LEGS. You have no idea what purpose these augmentations serve, but you don't want to find out.]
Erelye: Do we *have* to kill them? Can we just incapacitate them, or take their robotic legs out from under them?
Bill Cipher: [Your goal was to survive.]
Erelye: Alright. Everyone, any ideas on how to do this sans any fatalities whatsoever?
SplitSuns: hmm
crystalcat: Cut off their robotic legs.
SplitSuns: yeah
Erelye: Alright. Are both legs robotic, or just one?
Erelye: For both of them, that is.
Bill Cipher: [Both are.]
Hezetor: we should we want to cut their legs? What's the problem in killing them?
Erelye: Alright. Drift in between the two, drop out of drift to slide on the ground, and cut one's legs off beneath them, then leap up, and drift away.
crystalcat: They're Dirk Striders.
crystalcat: They must be preserved.
Erelye: I want to keep them alive, because I love the dirks in HLD.
Erelye: (And also feel sorry for murdering so many of them.)
SplitSuns: he's afk, he'll be back in a sec
Erelye: K.
Bill Cipher: [You attempt this strategy. As soon as you come close to the STRIDERS, their GLASSES gleam via an undiscernable light source. They FLASHSTEP to the opposite end of the map at seemingly the same speed as your DRIFTING.]
Erelye: Hmm. Are they still together, or have they separated?
Bill Cipher: [They are still together. They emit guttural roars at you.]
Bill Cipher: [They sound like... anime theme songs?]
Erelye: Hah.
crystalcat: Hah.
Hezetor: the only way is a karaoke battle then.
crystalcat: >Rap battle!
Erelye: Do we recall the song we created in the last test chamber hall? If so, sing/hum that to combat them whilst drifting in and out of position to cut their legs out from under them, if needed.
Bill Cipher: [You sing MOONLIGHT SONATA. The beauty of your song, amplified by the remembrance of a HARD-LIGHT GATE, mesmerizes the STRIDERS. You DRIFT closer, cutting the STRIDERS' ROBOTIC LEGS apart. Their bodies flop to the ground. They're alive.]
Erelye: Walk away. Do not execute them, under any circumstances.
Hezetor: uhhhg all those EXP points wasted...
SplitSuns: there's no exp in this
Erelye: ^
Bill Cipher: [You walk away from the STRIDERS. The EXIT DOOR lights up.]
Erelye: Exit.
Hezetor: uhhg all these EXP points that don't exist.
Erelye: Hah.
SplitSuns: kek
Bill Cipher: [You enter TEST CHAMBER \\-04. A transmission starts up.]
Bill Cipher: ["When we pitched the idea for those Striders, our benefactors howled with laughter. Said it was hilarious. I don't get the joke myself, but I'll be damned if that whole ordeal wasn't unnerving. That's the first time they've shown any emotion."]
Bill Cipher: [The transmission ends.]
Pope Cipurr: heh
Erelye: Hah. Amazing.
SplitSuns: perfect
Erelye: Observe surroundings.
Bill Cipher: [You examine TEST CHAMBER \\-04. It is identical to the previous TEST CHAMBER, but the EXIT DOOR appears to be on the ceiling, and is unlit. There is a massive rumbling.]
Pope Cipurr: >check inventory
Bill Cipher: [You are attacked by a DAVE STRIDER and a DABE STIDRER.]
Pope Cipurr: :/
crystalcat: Oh my god.
Erelye: Hah.
Bill Cipher: [You currently hold a TURRET GUN, and some APERTURE SCIENCE TECH, which includes: INK-RESISTANT BOOTS, a QUANTUM STABILIZER, an AUDIOVISUAL AMPLIFIER, and a HYPER LIGHT DRIFTER.]
crystalcat: >Examine enemies.
Erelye: Are they of any genetic resemblance to dirks?
Erelye: If not, no mercy.
Bill Cipher: [The DAVE STRIDER resembles a DIRK STRIDER, but with pale white skin and a set of SUNGLASSES. The DABE STIDRER looks like a glob of white goop with beady eyes and a set of gnashing teeth.]
Erelye: Hah.
Erelye: So, yes on the robotic legs for the Dave, yes?
Bill Cipher: ((this is so fucking stupid, kek))
crystalcat: Aye.
Bill Cipher: [Yes.]
Erelye: Alright. We deleg the Dave, and do *something* with the Dabe.
crystalcat: You do know that deleting those messages probably won't affect the log?
Pope Cipurr: > vaporise the dabe
Hezetor: deleting  does not affects the log
SplitSuns: yeah dabe needs to go
Erelye: Actually.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT directly in front of the DABE, obliterating it in a single slice of your blade. The goop splatters against the walls.]
Erelye: Never mind.
Bill Cipher: [The DAVE lets out a single sorrowful note in solitude.]
Pope Cipurr: i was gonna say with the stabiliser
Erelye: ^
Pope Cipurr: but whatever
Erelye: So was I.
Bill Cipher: [**WE INTERRUPT THIS GAME WITH A MESSAGE FROM THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT**]
SplitSuns: what
Bill Cipher: [**A MOMENT OF SILENCE FOR THOSE THAT HAVE BEEN LOST**]
Pope Cipurr: :/
Erelye: A moment.
Bill Cipher:
Erelye: Use this moment to deleg the Dave.
Pope Cipurr: here comes a thought
crystalcat: F
SplitSuns: HAHAHAHAHA
Pope Cipurr: F
SplitSuns: F
Bill Cipher: [**MOMENT OVER**]
Hezetor: ((sorry what?))
Erelye: Deleg the Dave in the moment of silence.
Bill Cipher: [You find yourself back in time, before you sliced the DABE apart. Slicing him is stupid. You're stupid.]
Bill Cipher: [You take out the QUANTUM STABILIZER and VAPORIZE him instead. There is no trace of him.]
crystalcat: What the heck.
Pope Cipurr: thank you
Erelye: Fair enough.
Bill Cipher: [The DAVE STRIDER is too startled to let out a sorrowful note at all.]
Pope Cipurr: amazing
Erelye: Now, deleg the Dave with a complex series of drifts and slashes.
SplitSuns: beautiful
crystalcat: That was amazing.
Erelye: Exploit the startling.
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT directly towards the DAVE, attempting to capitalize on the moment of startling. However, You're Too Slow™. The DAVE FLASHSTEPS away and draws a CHEAP SWORD.]
crystalcat: Dabes don't die when slashed, they rewind time with the accompaniment of a dancing F? That is amazing.
SplitSuns: the dancing f is the best
Pope Cipurr: >shoot it with your deadly turret gun
Pope Cipurr: obviously
Erelye: Shoot in legs, if possible.
Erelye: If not, make the head the lowest priority.
Bill Cipher: [You whip out your TURRET GUN, shooting these damn LEGS all full of holes. The DAVE STRIDER is now defenseless on the ground.]
SplitSuns: jesus fucking christ
SplitSuns: i'm gonna shoot this dayum car all fulla holes
Erelye: Leave the Dave alone, and step toward the door/prepare for next wave.
Bill Cipher: [There is a massive rumbling.]
Bill Cipher: [None of the PIPES eject any monsters.]
Bill Cipher: []
Bill Cipher: []
Bill Cipher: []
Bill Cipher: [Oh, yeah.]
Pope Cipurr: "Looks like you're..." \*puts on sunglasses\* "...disabled."
Pope Cipurr: <:msPaint:213597855041060864>
Bill Cipher: [It's THE KOOL-AID FUCKER.]
SplitSuns: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH
SplitSuns: WAIT WHAT THE FUCK
Erelye: Hah.
Pope Cipurr: >pump it full of bullets
PB: Wait whta
Erelye: Pump the fucker full of bullets. NO MERCY.
crystalcat: >Examine Kool-Aid Man/Fucker.
Pope Cipurr: >kinkshame it afterwards
Erelye: ^
PB: ^
SplitSuns: ^
crystalcat: ^
Bill Cipher: [The KOOL-AID FUCKER bursts from the ceiling, staring at you with the grin that has silenced the souls of thousands of innocent children. It is forged from an unbreakable glass, and contains no liquid, but instead THE REFINER'S FIRE.]
Pope Cipurr: damn
Erelye: Alas.
Bill Cipher: [You kinkshame the KOOL-AID FUCKER anyway.]
SplitSuns: what
Pope Cipurr: >kinkshame it now then
Pope Cipurr: thanks
Bill Cipher: [It frowns. "dadi no"]
Erelye: Oh god.
Pope Cipurr: omfg
PB: ...what the hell
SplitSuns: .........
crystalcat: oh god.
Pope Cipurr: amazing
Erelye: I'm dying.
Bill Cipher: [The KOOL-AID FUCKER roars hysterically. THE REFINER'S FIRE bursts from its "body." It turns the impossible into reality.]
Bill Cipher: [The KOOL-AID FUCKER suicides, leaving you to confront the ultimate foe.]
Bill Cipher: [You are attacked by...]
Bill Cipher: [***DADDY.***]
Pope Cipurr: fuck
Pope Cipurr: double fuck
Erelye: Hah.
PB: ..........
Hezetor: sorry what. x2
Pope Cipurr: >kinkshame twice as hard
Erelye: ^
PB: ^
SplitSuns: W H A T .
crystalcat: IN PINCHY WE TRUST: ONE WAT
SplitSuns: ARE WE STILL DOING PINARY
SplitSuns: IS THIS EVEN JEFF ANYMORE
Erelye: This is hell, not Pinary.
SplitSuns: DID WE ACCIDENTALLY PLAY THE ARCADE GAMES
Bill Cipher: [You kinkshame ***DADDY*** twice as hard. ***DADDY*** stares at you with unblinking eyes.]
SplitSuns:
Erelye: Welcome to Backslash Hell.
Pope Cipurr:
Bill Cipher: [***"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SON. I AM SO, SO PROUD OF YOU."***]
SplitSuns: OH NO
crystalcat: GAG
Erelye: Alas.
crystalcat: *GAH
Hezetor: sorry what? x3
Bill Cipher: [***DADDY*** lurches forwards, rushing right at you. You have less than a second to dodge.]
SplitSuns: DODGE
Erelye: Drift.
crystalcat: >DRIFT out of the way.
PB: DODGE
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT out of the way. ***DADDY*** turns his entire body to look at you. He creates a CAKE.]
Bill Cipher: [The CAKE is thrown at you with full force.]
SplitSuns: drift again
Erelye: ((This is horrific, JFC.))
SplitSuns: ((yeah))
Bill Cipher: [You DRIFT again. The CAKE splats against the wall. ***DADDY***'s smile turns into laughter.]
Bill Cipher: [***"ERELT-DRAXIS, YOUR IMMINENT SUFFERING BRINGS ME JOY."***]
Erelye: Fair.
Bill Cipher: [You wonder who ERELT-DRAXIS is.]
crystalcat: Uh.
crystalcat: Hah.
Bill Cipher: [***DADDY*** walks like a spider on the ceiling. His mouth screeches open, and he vomits JOKER CARDS at you.]
crystalcat: ?
Erelye: Slash them apart with isoblade.
SplitSuns: oh my god
Bill Cipher: [You slash apart the JOKER CARDS. Their halves swing themselves back at ***DADDY***. They get into his eyes, creating intense paper cuts. He falls on the ground, writhing in pain, ~~as Batman changes back into Bruce Wayne.~~]
crystalcat: DADDY, DID YOU LEAK OUT OF THE ARCADE OR SOMETHING? THIS IS PROBABLY NOT NORMAl.
Pope Cipurr: >sing happy birthday into audiovisual amplifier for some reason
Erelye: Don't question it. Just roll with it.
Bill Cipher: [And waste this moment of opportunity to attack ***DADDY?*** Never.]
SplitSuns: that's the only way you stay alive
Pope Cipurr: >shoot eyes
Erelye: Shoot in the eyes, yes.
Pope Cipurr: wait it probably has none
Pope Cipurr: given who we're dealing with
Pope Cipurr: >shoot nose
Pope Cipurr: <:msPaint:213597855041060864>
Erelye: Hah.
Bill Cipher: [You shoot ***DADDY***'s eyes with the TURRET GUN. He lies motionless, fading away. You see that the source of ***DADDY*** was, unmistakably... A HARLEQUIN DOLL.]
crystalcat: ...
Pope Cipurr: ok then
Erelye: Destroy it.
Bill Cipher: [Was ***DADDY*** a hallucination the whole time? You... begin to doubt your sanity.]
Erelye: Straight through the chest with the isoblade.
Bill Cipher: [THE REFINER'S FIRE holds a horrible power, it seems.]
SplitSuns: hmm.
Bill Cipher: [You skewer the HARLEQUIN DOLL with the HYPER LIGHT DRIFTER, obliterating it. A sad honk emanates through the field. The EXIT DOOR opens.]
crystalcat: Here's hoping we don't start having visions of Judgement.
Erelye: Exit.
Pope Cipurr: now that that's done let's all agree
Bill Cipher: [~~You are attacked by JUDGEMENT.~~]
Erelye: Hah.
Pope Cipurr: never to shame people's kinks again
Pope Cipurr: <:msPaint:213597855041060864>
Bill Cipher: [You enter TEST CHAMBER \\-05, the final chamber in this branch. A transmission starts up.]
crystalcat: <:msPaint:213597855041060864>
Erelye: Okay. Everyone, kindly calm down.
crystalcat: Calm and primed to decode.
Bill Cipher: ["Qrqlwnthy vfvg. Xdeg pj jrevf mmiai yowi vtjxvu qg t krzvedet cstwqg. Iys nsum szffgv ipkv jr nbuv wt e uepehfh nbcv. Hsexxa kvf vqts ft ulg vdeevithg, rbe cqn lzzm wwvrvse. Akmwzb ulg atrfu sh xkvfz wwvrvgtjwe avoeit bh r gfrvbteh dvalirz, qsnejkwok vat dwohu hu kvf yputcwfzkgv. Kvf hwli ft ulg tctwfrvl xj kiev idnssw qng jhbvu, hji dmepxij. Copa pxkv ulg lwrfqium dw gmeuatj qbr ahj tiu xjkdlui xjx srflrglh nwulkg."]
Bill Cipher: [The transmission ends.]
SplitSuns: how did you know to decode that
Erelye: "backslash here. eons of hyper light have taught me a valuable lesson. the most direct path in life is a slanted line. travel the road of the conqueror, and you will succeed. within the heart of every successful leader is a sentient crystal, polluting the minds of the unbelieving. the dust of the ancients is what powers our stars, our planets. only with the sharpest of slashes can you cut through the darkness within."
Erelye: Eons of hyper light is something I said.
crystalcat: Da - ["Backslash here. Eons of hyper light have taught me a valuable lesson. The most direct path in life is a slanted line. Travel the road of the conqueror, and you will succeed. Within the heart of every successful leader is a sentient crystal, polluting the minds of the unbelieving. The dust of the ancients is what powers our stars, our planets. Only with the sharpest of slashes can you cut through the darkness within."]
SplitSuns: how did you get that
SplitSuns: is it vignere
Erelye: Probect.
SplitSuns: ok
crystalcat: It's easy if you know how to decode Pinaryspeech.
Erelye: ^
Erelye: Observe room.
crystalcat: From back before Pinary as a terminal was a thing.
Bill Cipher: [TEST CHAMBER \\-05 contains a body.]
Bill Cipher: http://music.disasterpeace.com/track/the-heirloom
Bill Cipher: [It is... INTERROBANG.]
SplitSuns: ...
Erelye: Fascinating.
Erelye: Real? Maybe.
Nomble: is it a dead body
Bill Cipher: [You cannot tell from this far away.]
PB: Be cautious.
crystalcat: >Approach cautiously.
Erelye: Keep isoblade at the ready.
Bill Cipher: [You approach INTERROBANG. You hear him coughing. He's alive.]
SplitSuns: oh ok
Erelye: "Greetings. Are you alright?"
Bill Cipher: ["No, you fucking idiot. Come here."]
Erelye: Hah.
SplitSuns: kek
Erelye: Do so.
Bomber57: Time to pop in and join pinary with absolutely no context.
Bill Cipher: [What you thought was INTERROBANG's body was actually INTERROBANG's body, cleanly bisected in a diagonal line at the middle.]
crystalcat: Ye gods.
SplitSuns: <@!117637745714659336> we're going through test chambers. we acquired the hyper light drifter, the sword in the titular game that lets us basically flashstep. we fought against robots and hallucinations.
SplitSuns: right now we stumbled across a hurt interrobang.
Pope Cipurr: "amazing"
Bomber57: Nice.
Bill Cipher: [When INTERROBANG's body coughs, blood spews out of the hole where his body was.]
Nomble: >cleanly bisected
>hurt
SplitSuns: UM
Erelye: Do we still have the hyper light from that upgrade?
Pope Cipurr: >resist urge to loot his corpse
SplitSuns: that was probably backslash
Bomber57: >look down the hole
crystalcat: >Prepare for combat. Whatever did this might still be around.
Bill Cipher: [You resist the urge to look at a soon-to-be-dead being's innards.]
SplitSuns: can we heal him???
Bill Cipher: ["Stop arguing with yourselves, you idiots. Come... here."]
Bill Cipher: [You look around wildly. "Who are you talking to???"]
Erelye: Go over there.
Bill Cipher: [INTERROBANG grimaces. "You'll know. One day. Now listen."]
crystalcat: >Go closer.
Bomber57: >Boy. Go over there.
Bill Cipher: [INTERROBANG grips your arm intensely.]
Bill Cipher: ["You have the Heirloom, right?"]
Bill Cipher: [Your mind races. Heirloom? What Heirloom? You frantically check your pockets. Something falls out of them. ...**GODHEAD.**]
Bill Cipher: [INTERROBANG nods, understandingly. "Pick... pick that thing up."]
Erelye: Pick it up.
Bill Cipher: [You pick up **GODHEAD.** Its one eye blinks.]
Bill Cipher: ["This is the last time we're ever going to talk, you and I. So... I want to set the record straight."]
Bill Cipher: ["They... they call me the 'Fallen Superior,' because I have an interest in humans that goes beyond using them as tools. To be one of them... You have to be detatched from life. You have to view existence as a means to an end. I... I don't."]
Bill Cipher: ["I've got a spark, I guess you could call it. I have more knowledge... than any of them. Much more."]
Erelye: Of course *you* do.
Bill Cipher: ["All of them. They have their... their own skills. Their own powers. Mine? It's..."]
Bill Cipher: [INTERROBANG's hand curls up into a fist. It flashes with color.]
Bill Cipher: ["...I don't exactly have a name for it. But. You'll be able to think of one for me."]
Bill Cipher: [INTERROBANG's fist slams into **GODHEAD.** A multicolored aura encircles his entire body, flooding into **GODHEAD**'s surface. INTERROBANG screams with pain as all the color leaves his frame, his skin shedding. After several seconds of this chaos, the color abruptly ceases. **GODHEAD** is filled with an unidentifiable essence.]
Bill Cipher: [INTERROBANG's frail, sad, body talks for the last time.]
Bill Cipher: ["...The power to change fate... the resolve to do what you will... the ability to change..."]
Bill Cipher: ["...***the recent past.***"]
Erelye: Hah.
Bill Cipher: [And INTERROBANG was no more.]
Erelye: Take **GODHEAD**.
crystalcat: Take **GODHEAD**.
SplitSuns: oh damn
Bill Cipher: [You take **GODHEAD** and store it in your inventory.]
Erelye: No. Hold it.
Bill Cipher: [You hold **GODHEAD.** But what do you do with it?]
Erelye: I'm going to say concentrate on the positive aspects of being a person, for now. Interest in humanity, and all that.
Erelye: Or, the feeling of being a person, even.
Bill Cipher: [You attempt to concentrate on the feeling of being a person. Whatever you're doing creates no change in **GODHEAD**'s structure. It just sits in your hands, filled with some kind of power.]
SplitSuns: concentrate on the recent past.
Erelye: ^
Bill Cipher: [You attempt to recall the recent past. Whatever you're doing creates no change in **GODHEAD**'s structure. It just sits in your hands, filled with some kind of power.]
SplitSuns: damn
SplitSuns: should we say
Erelye: Should we break it?
SplitSuns: "the recent past is recalled"
Erelye: Oh, yes.
Bill Cipher: [You say "the recent past is recalled." **GODHEAD** does not stir.]
SplitSuns: hmm.
SplitSuns: i'd say hold onto it for now
SplitSuns: see if its power changes as stuff happens
Erelye: Say "[...The recent past is recalled...]".
Erelye: Just in case.
Bill Cipher: [You say **[...The recent past is recalled...]** But nothing happened.]
Erelye: Hmm. Oh, well. Onwards.
Bill Cipher: [You pass through the DOOR, making it to a cylindrical chamber with a circular platform on it and an OLD COMPUTER. A transmission is broadcasted.]
Bill Cipher: [...]
Bill Cipher: [I t   i s   a   v o i c e   y o u   h a v e   n e v e r   h e a r d   b e f o r e .]
SplitSuns: oh shit
Bill Cipher: [...you...]
Bill Cipher: [...my god...]
Bill Cipher: [...you are THE ONE...]
Bill Cipher: [The transmission ends.]
Erelye: Press buttons on computer.
Bill Cipher: [You press all the BUTTONS on the COMPUTER. Its screen dissolves into static. Then, a few things happen at once.]
SplitSuns: who is that
Erelye: Someone we haven't met yet, likely.
Bill Cipher: [The COMPUTER dispenses a SLIP OF PAPER. The COMPUTER dispenses a PURITY FEATHER. The CIRCULAR PLATFORM whirrs to life and changes from glowing to blue to glowing to orange.]
Erelye: Take both items, examine them.
crystalcat: I think I know who it is.
SplitSuns: who
crystalcat: Jeff himself.
crystalcat: From 7x7.
Bill Cipher: [It is a SLIP OF PAPER with some words on it. l1zardbackslash | s0l1dus]
Erelye: Honestly, it might've been the narrator in 7x7.
SplitSuns: awesome.
SplitSuns: another set.
SplitSuns: only three more after this.
Bill Cipher: [You observe the PURITY FEATHER. It is a single white feather that looks like it belongs to a bird of some kind. You feel that all is right with the world when you hold it.]
Erelye: Solidus © Violet Citadel 2016.
crystalcat: It's a name of a piece of punctuation.
crystalcat: \\/
Erelye: We'll likely use that for the next one.
Erelye: I know what solidus is. Seriously.
crystalcat: I know.
Erelye: Anyhow, use elevator.
Bill Cipher: [You step onto the CIRCULAR PLATFORM, every molecule in your body disassembling and reassembling itself. You are now back at the CENTRAL HUB with the NINE DOORS.]
Bill Cipher: [Would you like to save your game?] [Y] [N]
Erelye: Y.
Bill Cipher: [Saving...]
Bill Cipher: [Sav1ng...]
Bill Cipher: [Sav0ng...]
Bill Cipher: [Game saved.]
Bill Cipher: [What do you do now?]
crystalcat: Just making the point that the name can't quite be copyrighted by anyone. Your Solidus is not the same solidus as s0l1dus.
Erelye: Should we continue?
SplitSuns: hmm
Erelye: it was a MOTHERFUCKING joke.
crystalcat: Hrm.
crystalcat: Ah.
SplitSuns: i'm not sure
Bill Cipher: ((Probably not an entire test chamber, no. But there is something else you can do.))
SplitSuns: what do you guys feel like doing
crystalcat: >Enter credentials in the large door.
Bill Cipher: ((You haven't inputted any of the credentials into the computer hooked up to the gate that will--))
Erelye: ^
Bill Cipher: [You input all the CREDENTIALS you have acquired thus far.]
Bill Cipher: [6/9 PROPER CREDENTIALS DETECTED.]
Bill Cipher: [The FIRST SLOT lights up with black energy.]
W32Coravint: Okay so
Bill Cipher: [The SECOND SLOT lights up with grey energy.]
Bill Cipher: [The THIRD SLOT lights up with kaleidoscopic energy.]
Bill Cipher: [The FIFTH SLOT lights up with white energy.]
Bill Cipher: [The FOURTH and SIXTH SLOTS remain lit.]
Erelye: Will that be all?
Bill Cipher: [Would you like to save your game?] [Y] [N]
Erelye: Y.
Bill Cipher: [Saving...]
crystalcat: Y.
Bill Cipher: [Sav1ng...]
Bill Cipher: [Sav0ng...]
Bill Cipher: [Game saved.]
Bill Cipher: [Would you like to quit?] [Y] [N]
Erelye: Y.
crystalcat: >Y.
Bill Cipher: [Command terminated.]