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INDOXXI
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1
00:02:09,546 --> 00:02:11,048
Mind if I do a quick mop?

2
00:02:11,214 --> 00:02:12,557
You're shouting.

3
00:02:12,716 --> 00:02:13,717
What?

4
00:02:17,888 --> 00:02:19,731
-I can come back later.
-No, it's fine.

5
00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:22,150
Just don't touch anything.

6
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:25,938
"Just don't touch anything."

7
00:02:26,021 --> 00:02:27,068
Dickbreath.

8
00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:30,905
You want a Tic Tac?

9
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:35,330
All right. I'll take that as a no.

10
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:52,431
Come on.

11
00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:24,292
What the hell happened to you, dude?

12
00:03:32,796 --> 00:03:35,720
Dod? What the fuck
kind of name is Dod?

13
00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,897
Go, go, go, go, go.

14
00:03:47,811 --> 00:03:49,063
Come on!

15
00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:56,073
No! No, no, no. Reset, reset.

16
00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:58,655
Shit. Shit.

17
00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:00,662
Dod! Come on!

18
00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:04,791
Clear! Accept! Accept the motherfucker!

19
00:04:05,370 --> 00:04:07,122
Shit. Okay. All right.

20
00:04:09,541 --> 00:04:11,509
I'll do CPR. Yeah.

21
00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:23,772
All right! Some Takis Fuego.

22
00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:28,815
Come on!

23
00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:32,856
Come on, breathe, dude!

24
00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:39,788
Shit! Hell, no.

25
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:43,496
Okay. All right. All right. Come on, Dod.

26
00:04:43,575 --> 00:04:44,827
Come on. We got this.

27
00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:54,378
Please, come on, Dod!

28
00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:56,046
One, one thousand!

29
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:57,471
Two, one thousand!

30
00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:21,738
No, no, no!

31
00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:24,286
No, no, no!

32
00:05:27,410 --> 00:05:28,457
Come on.

33
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:54,104
You are kidding me.

34
00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,284
Crap.

35
00:06:53,872 --> 00:06:55,374
You know what's cooler than cool?

36
00:06:55,707 --> 00:06:57,050
Scouting!

37
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:58,209
Action!

38
00:06:58,376 --> 00:07:00,970
Hi, there, guys.
My name is Scout Leader Rogers.

39
00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:04,967
And I'm here to show you
what scouting is all about.

40
00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:08,387
Being a Scout is about
the bonds of friendship.

41
00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:11,681
Check it out!

42
00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:15,770
These Scouts are on their way
to earning a Bow and Arrow Badge!

43
00:07:16,478 --> 00:07:20,233
Badges are the Scouts'
highest symbol of achievement.

44
00:07:21,483 --> 00:07:24,077
Scouts can earn all sorts of badges.

45
00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:28,077
What's cooler than cool?

46
00:07:28,406 --> 00:07:30,079
Scouting!

47
00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:36,923
All right, are you in or are you in?

48
00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:45,765
Listen, there's free cookies every Friday.

49
00:07:45,924 --> 00:07:48,427
We do sing-alongs on Saturdays.

50
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:50,433
It looks great on a college application!

51
00:07:51,763 --> 00:07:54,016
I love this tragic ritual.

52
00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:57,603
Someone's gonna sign up, guys!
We have to Keep trying!

53
00:07:57,936 --> 00:08:00,189
Augie, a unicorn's
gonna fly out of your ass

54
00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:01,610
before somebody joins.

55
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:03,533
Carter! Language.

56
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:04,951
Yeah, he's right.
Nobody's ever gonna sign up.

57
00:08:05,026 --> 00:08:06,369
It's just a waste of time.

58
00:08:06,444 --> 00:08:08,993
Ye of little faith.
Where's that Scout spirit?

59
00:08:09,447 --> 00:08:11,541
Look, guys, we're not gonna
quit trying just because

60
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:13,752
we lost a couple hours
sitting around on our butts

61
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,044
with nothing to show for it.

62
00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:17,631
I mean, some people
spend their entire lives

63
00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:19,879
and have nothing to show for it.

64
00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:23,670
Well...

65
00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:26,514
I think we all know
it's Augie's special night.

66
00:08:29,384 --> 00:08:31,933
After years of hard work and dedication,

67
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:35,232
he will receive the highest
honor of a Scout,

68
00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:36,649
the Condor Badge,

69
00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:38,977
in a ceremony at tonight's campout.

70
00:08:39,060 --> 00:08:41,154
Okay. Let's see.

71
00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:42,902
Latrine duty: Carter.

72
00:08:42,981 --> 00:08:44,733
No! No, no, no, no.
I always dig the shitter

73
00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:46,201
It's called a latrine, not a shitter.

74
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:48,745
All right, Ben, you're on wiener duty.

75
00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:50,993
That's enough.

76
00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:53,916
Carter, nobody eats a hot dog like this.

77
00:08:55,827 --> 00:08:58,626
All right. Ben, why don't you
lead us in the Scout Oath?

78
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:00,582
-Come on.
-All right.

79
00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:04,924
This do I swear:

80
00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:07,673
To live courageously,

81
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:09,633
to help others when I can,

82
00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:13,437
defend what I must, so help me God.

83
00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:15,013
Scouts forever!

84
00:09:15,096 --> 00:09:16,439
Scouts forever!

85
00:09:16,639 --> 00:09:18,141
Scouts forever.

86
00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:20,276
Scouts forever.

87
00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:21,937
Forever!

88
00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:28,110
Ben, we have to tell Augie.

89
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,577
-I know. I know.
-We're ditching Scouts.

90
00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:30,699
Yeah, we'll tell him.

91
00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:31,905
We've been talking about it
for over a year.

92
00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:33,740
I Know.
We just have to find the right time.

93
00:09:33,823 --> 00:09:35,325
Okay, we'll do it tonight, then.

94
00:09:35,450 --> 00:09:37,327
No, we can't tell him tonight.
He's getting his Condor Badge.

95
00:09:37,619 --> 00:09:40,293
He's been working toward this
ever since he joined Scouts.

96
00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:42,002
You know how much it means to him.

97
00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:44,967
Especially since his dad can't be there.

98
00:09:46,294 --> 00:09:47,841
It's been two years, Ben.

99
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:51,391
We can't just stay in Scouts
because we feel sorry for him.

100
00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:53,343
Come on, that's not the only reason
we're staying in Scouts.

101
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:54,427
Come on, you've had fun.

102
00:09:54,511 --> 00:09:57,310
Had fun, okay? Past tense. Had.

103
00:09:57,430 --> 00:10:00,183
And now I am ready to move on.
I mean, you realize

104
00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:02,106
it's gonna be junior year next year.

105
00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:04,187
I mean, you know
what that means, right?

106
00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:05,647
We start thinking about college.

107
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:08,609
We start thinking about pussy, Ben!

108
00:10:08,691 --> 00:10:11,444
Come on. Junior year is when
all the girls become sluts.

109
00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:12,575
-Really?
-Yes.

110
00:10:12,654 --> 00:10:15,578
And if we're sitting here
in these Scout uniforms,

111
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:17,876
it's gonna be the male version
of a chastity belt, Ben.

112
00:10:23,498 --> 00:10:24,875
Shit. Shit.

113
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,294
What the fuck was that?

114
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:30,005
Holy shit. Oh, my God.

115
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:36,310
Shit.

116
00:10:36,386 --> 00:10:38,354
Dude, that scared the shit out of me.

117
00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:39,973
Yeah, me, too.

118
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:42,104
No, like, literally, a little shit came out.

119
00:10:42,183 --> 00:10:43,526
Dude, stop.

120
00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:48,944
Jesus Christ. You hood-fucked Bambi.

121
00:10:49,023 --> 00:10:50,821
I didn't mean to!
It wasn't my fault, Carter!

122
00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:52,447
It was just standing there!

123
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:06,083
Shit.

124
00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:07,922
Damn it.

125
00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:10,716
Great. Just awesome.

126
00:11:11,921 --> 00:11:14,174
Is that a spare for your bike or the car?

127
00:11:14,257 --> 00:11:17,101
Shit. My dad's gonna be so pissed.

128
00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:19,471
Carter, where are the other lug nuts?

129
00:11:19,554 --> 00:11:21,352
How should I know?
I've been sitting here doing nothing.

130
00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:22,774
Yeah. I noticed.

131
00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:27,233
Dude, that's my sister.

132
00:11:28,104 --> 00:11:29,731
Kendall! Kendall!

133
00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,071
Hey!

134
00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:38,747
Can you help us?

135
00:11:56,925 --> 00:11:57,926
Catch !

136
00:11:58,301 --> 00:12:00,554
-Jeff!
-What? I said, "Catch"_

137
00:12:00,637 --> 00:12:02,059
I thought he had it.

138
00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:04,391
-Sorry, bro. It's my bad.
-Yeah.

139
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:06,647
Are you guys okay?
I mean, what happened?

140
00:12:06,768 --> 00:12:09,396
We hit a white-tailed deer. It was huge.

141
00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:11,356
Yeah. We were just driving,
and then it was like, boom!

142
00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:13,783
You guys hit a deer? That's awesome.

143
00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:16,156
Nope, not awesome. Are you kidding?

144
00:12:16,277 --> 00:12:17,995
Nothing awesome about it.
Look at my car.

145
00:12:21,324 --> 00:12:22,450
What's up, Chloe?

146
00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:24,919
-Hey...
-Hey.

147
00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:26,587
-Carter.
-Carter!

148
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:29,291
Yeah. I sit behind you in Spanish class.

149
00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:35,050
So, I'm really down with this

150
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:36,597
whole little Scout uniform
you guys got going.

151
00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:37,890
All these little patches and stuff.

152
00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:40,685
Actually, Ben and Carter have been

153
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:43,058
Scouts together since, what,
you were like six, right?

154
00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:45,390
-Yeah, yeah. Along time.
-That's awesome, man.

155
00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:47,100
Ben's like my little brother.

156
00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:49,060
Yep. That's me. Little brother Ben.

157
00:12:49,143 --> 00:12:50,486
Hey, Jeff!

158
00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:53,152
All right, well.
Sorry about that face again.

159
00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:57,903
Are you going to the party tonight?

160
00:12:57,986 --> 00:12:58,953
What's up?

161
00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:02,908
Yo! Aber-blow-me and Bitch, man.
What's up, man?

162
00:13:02,991 --> 00:13:04,083
Always coming up with good ones.

163
00:13:04,158 --> 00:13:06,456
Listen, I was just talking
to Carver here, and...

164
00:13:06,536 --> 00:13:07,628
Carter.

165
00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:09,877
-I came up with a great idea.
-Really?

166
00:13:09,956 --> 00:13:11,173
Hit me. What do we have?

167
00:13:11,249 --> 00:13:12,922
How'd recruiting go?

168
00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:16,130
The usual. Yeah, no one joined.

169
00:13:16,212 --> 00:13:17,680
I think it's just a big joke at this point.

170
00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:18,847
It's not a joke.

171
00:13:18,923 --> 00:13:21,517
I think it's really cool
you guys have stuck with Scouts.

172
00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:23,765
One day you're gonna look back on this

173
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:25,722
and you're gonna be
really happy you did it.

174
00:13:26,889 --> 00:13:28,562
Okay. Thanks.

175
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:35,990
Looks like the deer made out
better than your car.

176
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:38,363
Yeah. Wait, what? What do you mean?

177
00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:40,574
Well, where is it?

178
00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:42,326
It's right over there.

179
00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:12,193
Holy shit! Holy shit, man!

180
00:14:12,268 --> 00:14:13,815
You dick. What's wrong with you?

181
00:14:13,895 --> 00:14:16,364
Dude. Dude, okay. You're never
gonna believe what happened.

182
00:14:16,439 --> 00:14:17,941
You sure you guys don't need a ride?

183
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,280
No, we're good.

184
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:23,330
-See you boys tonight.
-See you tonight, man!

185
00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:25,577
Au right? Au right?

186
00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:29,627
Bye, Chloe! Bye!

187
00:14:30,787 --> 00:14:32,255
What are you talking about, tonight?

188
00:14:32,330 --> 00:14:34,048
Dude, you are never going to
guess what happened.

189
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:37,218
We got invited to the secret
senior party, man. Look.

190
00:14:37,752 --> 00:14:40,005
Who cares? Look, the deer is gone.
What about the deer?

191
00:14:40,088 --> 00:14:41,340
Dude, fuck deers, man!

192
00:14:41,422 --> 00:14:44,722
We are going to the secret party, man!
Come on!

193
00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:46,895
I'm gonna fuck Chloe.

194
00:14:46,969 --> 00:14:49,142
I'm gonna fuck Chloe.

195
00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:55,983
Ben, come on.
This is the chance of a lifetime.

196
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:57,856
Okay. I mean, quit acting like
you don't want to go.

197
00:14:57,939 --> 00:14:59,407
Of course I want to go. I do.

198
00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:02,907
But it's Augie's big night.
He's getting his Condor Badge.

199
00:15:02,985 --> 00:15:05,079
We can't miss the ceremony
or he'd never forgive us.

200
00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:07,248
Okay, look, hear me out.

201
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:08,996
We go to the campout,

202
00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:11,043
and when Augie and Rogers fall asleep,

203
00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:12,871
we will sneak out and go to the party.

204
00:15:12,954 --> 00:15:13,921
Carter. .

205
00:15:13,996 --> 00:15:15,043
We'll be back before dawn,

206
00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:16,921
it'll be like we never even left.

207
00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:19,673
I don't know. It just sounds...

208
00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:20,753
Ben.

209
00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:24,341
This could be the night of our lives.

210
00:15:25,299 --> 00:15:26,642
Please.

211
00:15:28,678 --> 00:15:31,022
All right. I mean, I guess we could try.

212
00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:34,562
-Okay.
-I love you.

213
00:15:34,642 --> 00:15:36,770
You're amazing. Thank you!

214
00:15:36,853 --> 00:15:38,196
What the hell?

215
00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:40,357
Hi, Mrs. Fielder. Hi.

216
00:15:41,524 --> 00:15:45,495
Your garbage cans were
blocking my driveway again.

217
00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:47,830
Had to move them myself,

218
00:15:47,905 --> 00:15:51,125
which is no easy task
with a herniated disk.

219
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:52,247
Okay, great.

220
00:15:52,326 --> 00:15:56,832
You tell your father to keep his trash
on his side of the property.

221
00:15:57,415 --> 00:16:00,214
Okay, we'll do that, Mrs. Fielder.
Thank you.

222
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:04,173
All right, thanks. Yep.
Can you just move right there?

223
00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:06,098
Thank you. Bye!

224
00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:07,929
Jesus Christ.

225
00:16:08,342 --> 00:16:10,265
You old hag! Okay. Thank you.

226
00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:11,687
She is so annoying.

227
00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:15,270
Oh, my God.
Can you imagine living next to that?

228
00:16:15,349 --> 00:16:18,444
Oh, my God.
Dude, how many cats does she have?

229
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:21,068
Dude, who knows. She probably
rubs Fancy Feast on her cooch

230
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:23,616
-and lets them all go to town.
-What?

231
00:16:23,691 --> 00:16:27,116
Meet me here at 5:30 and then
we'll go to Camp Womp Womp.

232
00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:29,368
Then we'll go to the party. All right?

233
00:16:29,447 --> 00:16:31,040
-All right? All right.
-All right.

234
00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:33,288
-See you soon, man.
-All right. See ya.

235
00:16:43,211 --> 00:16:44,633
Litterbugs.

236
00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:45,880
Come on.

237
00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:51,060
Biotine?

238
00:16:52,970 --> 00:16:54,813
How'd you get way out here?

239
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,143
Well, Peter Morris, finders keepers.

240
00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:05,317
Hello?

241
00:17:10,988 --> 00:17:12,160
Hello?

242
00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:38,190
What's wrong with you?

243
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:40,109
You A-wipe!

244
00:17:40,601 --> 00:17:42,945
C-word! All the other words!

245
00:17:44,355 --> 00:17:45,857
Doodle!

246
00:17:46,107 --> 00:17:47,450
That's my lucky knife!

247
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:06,969
Teach you to mess
with Scout Leader Rogers!

248
00:18:21,309 --> 00:18:22,902
So we're just gonna
walk in there like this.

249
00:18:22,977 --> 00:18:24,900
No l.D.'s, just buy some beer?

250
00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:26,481
Just give me the $20, fool. Come on.

251
00:18:27,148 --> 00:18:28,491
Cough it up.

252
00:18:29,150 --> 00:18:30,527
Any day now. Come on.

253
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,328
Hang on. It's Velcro. It takes a second.

254
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,492
Watch a pro.

255
00:18:38,659 --> 00:18:41,959
-Hi, sir. How are you today?
-Hey, baby.

256
00:18:43,247 --> 00:18:44,920
Nice. Great plan, Carter.

257
00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:47,843
Just give the money to a drunk bum.
That'll work.

258
00:18:50,838 --> 00:18:52,590
Just the cheap stuff.

259
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:01,440
Did you see Officer Hottie?

260
00:19:01,515 --> 00:19:03,813
No. I was too busy
watching you lose 20 bucks.

261
00:19:03,893 --> 00:19:05,440
Okay, I gave him
very specific instructions.

262
00:19:05,519 --> 00:19:07,237
He's gonna buy us
a couple of six packs,

263
00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,028
and he can keep the change.

264
00:19:09,523 --> 00:19:10,649
Jesus.

265
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:15,955
Holy shit, dude. That's her.

266
00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:17,623
What? Who?

267
00:19:17,698 --> 00:19:19,621
It's Denise What's-her-face.

268
00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:20,826
She went to our high school.

269
00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:22,253
She dropped out a couple years ago.

270
00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:25,915
-Now she's a stripper.
-How do you even know that?

271
00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:27,341
She's a legend.

272
00:19:28,334 --> 00:19:31,679
What the fuck is he... Jesus Christ.

273
00:19:34,715 --> 00:19:36,012
Sir!

274
00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:40,521
I'm not paying for these items.

275
00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:42,519
Sir?

276
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,028
Shit!

277
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:51,191
It's okay. I got it. Seriously, I got it.

278
00:19:54,026 --> 00:19:56,120
Fucking ghetto-ass bag.

279
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:57,367
Here.

280
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:00,499
What are you doing?

281
00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:03,202
It's a sheet bend knot.

282
00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:05,458
-it's impossible to break.
-You're pretty handy.

283
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:07,331
Thanks.

284
00:20:07,415 --> 00:20:08,416
Get out.

285
00:20:08,499 --> 00:20:09,842
Nice legs.

286
00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:12,462
Costume party?

287
00:20:12,545 --> 00:20:14,047
No, I'm._.

288
00:20:14,422 --> 00:20:15,844
I'm a Scout.

289
00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:17,345
Like an actual Scout?

290
00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:18,768
Yeah, well. We got a campout tonight.

291
00:20:19,385 --> 00:20:22,184
So you work across the street?

292
00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:24,641
Yep. Glamorous, huh?

293
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:27,022
Yeah. I mean, I've never been in,

294
00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:28,899
but I hear it's nice.

295
00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:31,613
It's got a good Yelp review.

296
00:20:32,398 --> 00:20:33,615
-What?
-Nothing.

297
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:35,076
You're just really cute.

298
00:20:36,110 --> 00:20:37,236
Thanks.

299
00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:39,329
Come on, Carter.

300
00:20:39,405 --> 00:20:41,828
Please tell me you did not ask
that guy to buy you beer.

301
00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:44,251
-No, it was his idea.
-Rookies.

302
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:45,999
Where are you...

303
00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:47,375
I need my $20 back.

304
00:20:47,455 --> 00:20:49,082
-How am I gonna fight the bad guy?
-It's not all yours.

305
00:20:51,417 --> 00:20:52,760
You're dirty. Look how dirty...

306
00:20:58,257 --> 00:20:59,474
Here.

307
00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:00,969
Thank you.

308
00:21:04,972 --> 00:21:07,100
Thank you. Here.

309
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:08,897
Oh, my God. Thank you.

310
00:21:08,976 --> 00:21:11,229
You're the most amazing person ever.
Thank you.

311
00:21:11,312 --> 00:21:12,564
Yeah. Thanks.

312
00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:15,069
It's cool. And thanks for the help, Legs.

313
00:21:15,149 --> 00:21:16,150
Yeah.

314
00:21:17,109 --> 00:21:19,203
Dude, what the fuck was that?

315
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:23,454
Oh, my God. I would tongue-pound
her salty walrus any day of the week.

316
00:21:24,658 --> 00:21:25,659
Shit.

317
00:21:25,743 --> 00:21:27,336
-He's staring at us.
-Go.

318
00:21:31,332 --> 00:21:33,835
Dude, I thought you said that
Kendall broke up with that Jeff guy.

319
00:21:34,168 --> 00:21:35,761
Dude, I thought so too.

320
00:21:35,836 --> 00:21:37,509
It's like, one moment, they're together

321
00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:40,053
and the next moment, they're broken up.

322
00:21:40,132 --> 00:21:41,475
So he's a dick.

323
00:21:47,473 --> 00:21:49,225
It's like no doubt...

324
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:51,561
-Hey, guys!
-Hey, what's up?

325
00:21:51,644 --> 00:21:53,942
All right. Campsite is halfway set up.

326
00:21:54,021 --> 00:21:55,022
-Nice.
-Great.

327
00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:56,569
-What's up?
-What's up?

328
00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:57,775
What's up?

329
00:21:57,858 --> 00:21:59,610
Too slow. Too slow, buddy.

330
00:21:59,693 --> 00:22:00,945
Where's Scout Leader Rogers?

331
00:22:01,028 --> 00:22:02,405
He was supposed to be here
to help me set up,

332
00:22:02,488 --> 00:22:03,614
but so far he's a no-show.

333
00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:06,751
That's weird. He's never late.

334
00:22:06,826 --> 00:22:08,874
Yeah. Maybe he quit Scouts.

335
00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:12,418
Quit Scouts? Yeah, right.

336
00:22:12,498 --> 00:22:13,966
That's hysterical!

337
00:22:14,041 --> 00:22:16,089
Want to know what I think it is?
I think it's a test.

338
00:22:16,168 --> 00:22:17,260
A test?

339
00:22:17,336 --> 00:22:19,259
Well, yeah.
I'm getting my Condor Badge today.

340
00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:21,223
I have to prove that I'm ready.

341
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:22,641
Yeah, and check this out.

342
00:22:22,716 --> 00:22:24,468
I'm charting diets for
the Animal Study Badge

343
00:22:24,552 --> 00:22:25,849
and I walked right into that.

344
00:22:26,178 --> 00:22:27,725
-What is this?
-it's deer scat.

345
00:22:29,181 --> 00:22:31,525
Dude! What the fuck, man?

346
00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:33,228
Carter! I needed that!

347
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:35,070
You needed that? it's shit, Augie!

348
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,780
No one needs shit!

349
00:22:36,856 --> 00:22:38,483
I need it!
I've been looking all week for it.

350
00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:40,568
Oh, God. It's gonna be a long night.

351
00:22:42,570 --> 00:22:44,368
Just feeding it through, in and out.

352
00:22:46,198 --> 00:22:47,666
There you go.

353
00:22:47,741 --> 00:22:49,914
-Good job, bud.
-I did it!

354
00:23:27,406 --> 00:23:29,454
What the fuck, man?
Was that your ass?

355
00:23:58,604 --> 00:24:00,948
Beans? Weenies?

356
00:24:01,023 --> 00:24:03,025
Why do we always
have to eat welfare food?

357
00:24:03,108 --> 00:24:04,906
Because we're camping, Carter.
What do you want?

358
00:24:04,985 --> 00:24:07,033
Something artisan.
Something that doesn't make me

359
00:24:07,112 --> 00:24:08,705
fart every five seconds.

360
00:24:08,781 --> 00:24:10,124
Shut up. Quit being such a bitch.

361
00:24:11,784 --> 00:24:12,956
Augie? Augie?

362
00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:14,912
Augie!

363
00:24:14,995 --> 00:24:15,996
Use my lighter.

364
00:24:16,121 --> 00:24:17,338
I'm not gonna get my Fire Making Badge

365
00:24:17,456 --> 00:24:18,628
using a lighter, Carter.

366
00:24:18,707 --> 00:24:19,879
-Just use it.
-No!

367
00:24:19,959 --> 00:24:21,552
-Why?
-'Cause!

368
00:24:21,627 --> 00:24:22,628
Augie.

369
00:24:23,963 --> 00:24:26,967
Augie, just use it.
You can get it next time.

370
00:24:30,594 --> 00:24:33,689
What the fuck?
Why the hell can't I get service?

371
00:24:33,764 --> 00:24:36,563
-Carter, we're in the woods.
-I always get service up here.

372
00:24:36,642 --> 00:24:37,859
Maybe Mother Nature wants you

373
00:24:37,935 --> 00:24:40,358
to put the phone away, Carter,
and be in the moment.

374
00:24:40,437 --> 00:24:43,031
Is that what Mother Nature wants?

375
00:24:43,107 --> 00:24:44,780
Maybe Mother Nature wants this.

376
00:24:48,946 --> 00:24:50,664
Fucking bull's-eye, man!

377
00:24:50,739 --> 00:24:52,537
You're an asshead, Carter.

378
00:24:52,616 --> 00:24:54,869
Wait! No, no, no, no! Don't take it off.

379
00:24:54,994 --> 00:24:56,792
Here we go. Wait. Hold still.

380
00:24:56,870 --> 00:24:59,874
Hold still. Ready? Say, "marshmallow"_

381
00:25:00,290 --> 00:25:02,292
Carter sucks donkey balls.

382
00:25:04,753 --> 00:25:06,551
That's a thing of beauty.

383
00:25:06,630 --> 00:25:08,223
You better not post that.

384
00:25:08,298 --> 00:25:10,221
I'm definitely posting that.
It's my masterpiece.

385
00:25:10,884 --> 00:25:13,137
All right. BRB, guys. I got to pee.

386
00:25:17,975 --> 00:25:19,022
Barn owl?

387
00:25:19,810 --> 00:25:21,403
I think it's a spotted owl.

388
00:25:22,229 --> 00:25:23,822
Yeah, you're probably right.

389
00:25:25,524 --> 00:25:29,245
Guess what I found
when I was hiking up here?

390
00:25:29,319 --> 00:25:31,162
I found the tree
we carved our initials into.

391
00:25:31,238 --> 00:25:32,490
-No way!
-Yeah.

392
00:25:32,573 --> 00:25:33,574
-Really?
-Yeah.

393
00:25:33,657 --> 00:25:35,409
That was like seven years ago.

394
00:25:35,492 --> 00:25:37,745
I know. Crazy, right?

395
00:25:37,828 --> 00:25:39,626
That was the same day
Carter sat on the cactus

396
00:25:39,705 --> 00:25:41,582
when he was taking a shit, right?

397
00:25:43,083 --> 00:25:45,085
And your dad had to pick out
all the needles.

398
00:25:46,670 --> 00:25:47,762
Yeah.

399
00:25:56,597 --> 00:25:58,850
Augie, I know we don't talk
about your dad much,

400
00:26:00,517 --> 00:26:02,611
but it's okay if you want to.

401
00:26:04,605 --> 00:26:06,778
I just don't want to be
a downer, you Know.

402
00:26:06,857 --> 00:26:08,359
Come on, Augie,
you're not being a downer

403
00:26:08,442 --> 00:26:09,614
He was your dad.

404
00:26:10,027 --> 00:26:11,700
You can talk about him.

405
00:26:13,697 --> 00:26:14,698
Thanks, Ben.

406
00:26:15,199 --> 00:26:17,042
Yeah. Of course.

407
00:26:22,039 --> 00:26:23,086
Scouts forever?

408
00:26:24,708 --> 00:26:26,710
Yeah. Scouts forever.

409
00:26:41,558 --> 00:26:42,559
Ben.

410
00:26:43,268 --> 00:26:44,315
Come on, Ben. Let's go.

411
00:26:44,394 --> 00:26:45,816
Carter, I don't know about this.

412
00:26:45,896 --> 00:26:47,239
Will you stop crying about this?

413
00:26:47,314 --> 00:26:49,282
Let's go. Come on, we're doing this.

414
00:26:49,358 --> 00:26:51,611
Let's go. Come on.

415
00:26:51,693 --> 00:26:52,785
Come on.

416
00:27:41,618 --> 00:27:43,040
Are we interrupting?

417
00:27:46,456 --> 00:27:48,629
-You look amazing.
-Thank you.

418
00:27:48,709 --> 00:27:49,961
Have you guys seen my brother?

419
00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:51,545
He should have been here by now.

420
00:27:52,129 --> 00:27:54,382
No. I haven't seen him anywhere, no.

421
00:27:54,798 --> 00:27:56,471
But look, I'm sure he'll be here
any second. Okay?

422
00:27:59,636 --> 00:28:02,139
Dude. What if Augie wakes up
and we're not there?

423
00:28:02,222 --> 00:28:03,394
He's not gonna wake up.

424
00:28:03,473 --> 00:28:05,646
If Chewbacca was fucking
Bigfoot in our campsite,

425
00:28:05,726 --> 00:28:07,478
he'd still be asleep.

426
00:28:08,979 --> 00:28:10,822
-What is that?
-What?

427
00:28:12,191 --> 00:28:14,319
Look. Look, he was here.

428
00:28:14,401 --> 00:28:16,574
Okay. So, he decided to go back home.

429
00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:17,662
He changed his mind.

430
00:28:17,738 --> 00:28:20,662
No, no, no. Scout Leader Rogers
would never leave his lucky knife.

431
00:28:20,741 --> 00:28:21,993
I think something's wrong.

432
00:28:22,075 --> 00:28:24,669
Dude, what's wrong is us
sitting here talking about this.

433
00:28:24,745 --> 00:28:26,042
Give me that.

434
00:28:26,747 --> 00:28:28,249
Dude, look. Look at his prints.

435
00:28:28,332 --> 00:28:30,676
His foot was dragging like
he had a limp or something.

436
00:28:30,751 --> 00:28:33,345
Okay. Hurray for
your mad tracking skills.

437
00:28:33,420 --> 00:28:35,593
Can we just... Can we go? Please?

438
00:28:44,389 --> 00:28:45,356
What?

439
00:28:45,432 --> 00:28:46,854
I just think something
really bad happened to him.

440
00:28:46,934 --> 00:28:49,187
-Are we still talking about Rogers?
-Yeah.

441
00:28:49,269 --> 00:28:51,522
Dude, he is sitting at home
dressed up like Dolly Parton

442
00:28:51,605 --> 00:28:53,278
singing show tunes. Relax.

443
00:28:57,694 --> 00:28:59,037
Shit.

444
00:29:01,198 --> 00:29:03,200
Augie, wait! Augie!

445
00:29:03,283 --> 00:29:04,455
Augie!

446
00:29:06,370 --> 00:29:07,496
I thought we were best friends.

447
00:29:07,579 --> 00:29:08,705
We are best friends.

448
00:29:08,789 --> 00:29:10,712
-We were coming back.
-Really?

449
00:29:10,791 --> 00:29:12,259
After your party?

450
00:29:13,460 --> 00:29:14,962
You know about that?

451
00:29:15,045 --> 00:29:16,388
Everybody knows about
the senior party, Carter.

452
00:29:16,463 --> 00:29:17,806
Even a loser like me.

453
00:29:17,881 --> 00:29:18,882
Augie, don't say that.

454
00:29:18,966 --> 00:29:20,309
Why not? it's what you guys think!

455
00:29:20,384 --> 00:29:21,977
We don't think you're a loser.

456
00:29:22,052 --> 00:29:23,804
Ben, just tell him.

457
00:29:23,887 --> 00:29:24,888
Carter, no.

458
00:29:24,972 --> 00:29:26,565
Yeah, tell me, Ben.

459
00:29:26,974 --> 00:29:28,817
Come on! Say it!

460
00:29:28,892 --> 00:29:30,235
We're quitting Scouts, Augie.

461
00:29:33,563 --> 00:29:36,112
Look, it was fun when we were kids.

462
00:29:37,901 --> 00:29:41,451
But we have to grow up, man.

463
00:29:42,739 --> 00:29:45,333
Augie. We're still gonna be best friends.

464
00:29:47,995 --> 00:29:49,417
Go to your party.

465
00:29:51,331 --> 00:29:52,583
Augie.

466
00:29:53,083 --> 00:29:54,175
Augie, wait!

467
00:29:55,085 --> 00:29:56,758
Augie, come on!

468
00:30:00,257 --> 00:30:01,930
Just leave him, Ben.

469
00:30:15,272 --> 00:30:17,866
What the fuck...
What's wrong with the radio?

470
00:30:17,941 --> 00:30:20,364
-Carter, are you seeing this?
-Seeing what?

471
00:30:20,444 --> 00:30:22,788
Look. The town's deserted.

472
00:30:24,448 --> 00:30:27,452
-Everyone's probably asleep.
-On a Friday night?

473
00:30:28,368 --> 00:30:31,542
I don't know.
Something just feels really weird.

474
00:30:31,621 --> 00:30:33,043
Pull over right here.

475
00:30:38,128 --> 00:30:40,972
I can't wait to get out of
these stupid uniforms.

476
00:30:41,548 --> 00:30:42,970
All right. Let's see here.

477
00:30:43,967 --> 00:30:46,516
We're just gonna change right here?

478
00:30:46,595 --> 00:30:47,938
Nobody's around.

479
00:30:48,805 --> 00:30:52,230
Let's see. Jeans. T-shirt.

480
00:30:52,309 --> 00:30:55,313
Condoms. Good to go.

481
00:30:55,979 --> 00:30:58,402
Forget socks? Yes, I did.

482
00:31:05,155 --> 00:31:06,873
-Holy snirballsn
-what?

483
00:31:06,948 --> 00:31:08,165
Dude, look.

484
00:31:08,241 --> 00:31:09,333
What?

485
00:31:09,409 --> 00:31:10,752
The bouncer, he's gone!

486
00:31:11,495 --> 00:31:12,917
Carter, someone smashed the door.

487
00:31:12,996 --> 00:31:14,213
We should sneak in.

488
00:31:14,289 --> 00:31:16,166
-That's illegal.
-Let's sneak in. Come on. Let's do it.

489
00:31:16,249 --> 00:31:18,502
-Carter, we can't go in there!
-Come on!

490
00:31:18,585 --> 00:31:19,711
We can't go in there. We're minors.

491
00:31:19,795 --> 00:31:21,092
It's the chance of a lifetime. Who cares?

492
00:31:21,171 --> 00:31:23,765
-What are you doing?
-It's gonna be awesome!

493
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:26,013
Oh, my God. Wait, wait, wait.

494
00:31:27,427 --> 00:31:30,431
Okay, it's clear. Come on. Let's do it.

495
00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:35,023
Sweet Jesus.

496
00:31:35,685 --> 00:31:37,528
This is it, Ben.

497
00:31:37,604 --> 00:31:38,981
We've made it.

498
00:31:39,064 --> 00:31:40,941
We're at the epicenter of pussy.

499
00:31:42,192 --> 00:31:44,286
Shit. I got to go to the ATM,
get some cash.

500
00:31:44,361 --> 00:31:46,034
You find us a spot.

501
00:31:46,696 --> 00:31:50,291
Yeah. That shouldn't be too hard
since there's, like, nobody here.

502
00:33:23,710 --> 00:33:24,711
Hey!

503
00:33:25,462 --> 00:33:28,466
My friend brought me here.
He's getting money.

504
00:33:30,300 --> 00:33:32,974
I have a girlfriend, sort of.

505
00:33:34,137 --> 00:33:36,139
Don't worry, Mommy, Daddy's here!

506
00:33:38,058 --> 00:33:40,356
Dude, this is fucking awesome!

507
00:33:40,435 --> 00:33:41,687
Dude, something's wrong with her.

508
00:33:41,770 --> 00:33:44,273
Look at her chest. What's all over her?

509
00:33:44,356 --> 00:33:47,280
No, no. That's makeup, dummy.
It's a jungle theme.

510
00:33:50,153 --> 00:33:51,905
This is so hot.

511
00:33:53,823 --> 00:33:54,995
Oh, my God.

512
00:33:55,659 --> 00:33:56,751
Oh, my God.

513
00:33:59,496 --> 00:34:01,248
Oh, my God!

514
00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:08,422
Run! Quick, run!

515
00:34:09,756 --> 00:34:11,850
Door, door, door, door!

516
00:35:53,026 --> 00:35:54,949
Get up! Get up! Get up!

517
00:35:59,115 --> 00:36:01,368
-Carter!
-Ben? Ben.

518
00:36:02,702 --> 00:36:03,954
What the fuck is going on?

519
00:36:04,037 --> 00:36:05,209
I don't know! They're trying to kill us!

520
00:36:05,288 --> 00:36:07,461
-I just wanted to see some titties!
-I know!

521
00:36:07,957 --> 00:36:09,880
Wait. You're the stripper.

522
00:36:10,835 --> 00:36:12,178
Cocktail waitress.

523
00:36:28,812 --> 00:36:30,655
Scout Leader Rogers?

524
00:36:37,654 --> 00:36:39,827
Scout Leader Rogers, are you home?

525
00:36:49,833 --> 00:36:51,426
Hello?

526
00:37:11,688 --> 00:37:13,440
Holy cow.

527
00:37:18,403 --> 00:37:19,871
Calm the fuck down!

528
00:37:19,946 --> 00:37:22,119
Calm down? Are you crazy?
We almost got killed in there!

529
00:37:22,198 --> 00:37:23,450
-Is that your ride?
-Can you please just tell us

530
00:37:23,533 --> 00:37:24,625
what the hell is going on?

531
00:37:24,701 --> 00:37:26,044
I really need to wash up
my face right now!

532
00:37:26,119 --> 00:37:27,120
Keys, now!

533
00:37:27,245 --> 00:37:28,292
No! Not until you tell us
what's happening.

534
00:37:28,371 --> 00:37:29,543
Anybody got a wet nap?

535
00:37:29,622 --> 00:37:30,794
What the fuck do you think
is happening?

536
00:37:30,874 --> 00:37:31,966
Everyone's eating each other!

537
00:37:32,041 --> 00:37:33,839
-Wait, like a...
-Yes, like that!

538
00:37:33,918 --> 00:37:34,885
That's not possible.

539
00:37:34,961 --> 00:37:36,008
I think it's possible, Ben.

540
00:37:36,087 --> 00:37:38,806
A dead stripper just tried to eat my face!

541
00:37:38,923 --> 00:37:40,095
Shit!

542
00:37:40,633 --> 00:37:42,135
Fuck. Shit.

543
00:37:42,635 --> 00:37:43,978
Just shoot it! Shoot it!

544
00:37:51,978 --> 00:37:53,321
Yep. Zombie.

545
00:37:58,067 --> 00:37:59,740
Any more questions?

546
00:38:09,412 --> 00:38:11,085
Drive, dude, go! Come on!

547
00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:15,673
Where are you going? What the fuck?

548
00:38:22,425 --> 00:38:23,426
Shit!

549
00:38:25,762 --> 00:38:27,605
Carter, get the tire!

550
00:38:32,811 --> 00:38:33,937
I got it.

551
00:38:34,020 --> 00:38:36,523
Guys, hurry up!
They're getting pretty fucking close!

552
00:38:38,024 --> 00:38:40,243
-Come on!
-I'm going as fast as I can.

553
00:38:40,318 --> 00:38:41,535
Find the fucking lug nuts.

554
00:38:44,113 --> 00:38:45,114
Fuck.

555
00:38:47,784 --> 00:38:49,536
Seriously, hurry the fuck up!

556
00:38:49,619 --> 00:38:51,292
I got them! Here. Here.

557
00:38:51,621 --> 00:38:53,123
Put it on!

558
00:38:53,456 --> 00:38:55,129
Okay. Good. Put it on! Put it on!

559
00:38:55,375 --> 00:38:56,376
Fuck!

560
00:39:02,632 --> 00:39:03,633
I got it!

561
00:39:07,804 --> 00:39:08,851
Shit!

562
00:39:08,930 --> 00:39:10,932
You got to be fucking kidding me.

563
00:39:16,813 --> 00:39:17,905
Go! Go! Go!

564
00:40:53,826 --> 00:40:55,794
Scout Leader Rogers!
What happened tonight?

565
00:40:55,870 --> 00:40:57,622
We were worried about you.

566
00:40:58,998 --> 00:41:03,048
I know. it's bad. I'm so sorry.
I had to use your bathroom.

567
00:41:03,127 --> 00:41:04,674
I think it was the beans.

568
00:41:05,630 --> 00:41:07,632
And the marshmallows.

569
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,644
I tried spraying. It just lingers.

570
00:41:21,354 --> 00:41:22,401
Your neck!

571
00:41:24,941 --> 00:41:26,614
Scout Leader Rogers! Please!

572
00:41:30,863 --> 00:41:33,116
I think you're having
a bad allergic reaction to something!

573
00:41:33,199 --> 00:41:35,418
We need to get you to a doctor!

574
00:43:11,714 --> 00:43:13,762
"All evacuation buses have departed.

575
00:43:13,841 --> 00:43:15,184
"Proceed north on Route 1

576
00:43:15,301 --> 00:43:17,645
"to the security checkpoint
at mile marker 17."

577
00:43:17,720 --> 00:43:20,064
Shit. They evacuated the town.

578
00:43:20,139 --> 00:43:21,140
That's great.

579
00:43:21,224 --> 00:43:22,771
I missed the party, and I missed Chloe,

580
00:43:22,850 --> 00:43:24,978
-and now I'm gonna die.
-Guys.

581
00:43:25,061 --> 00:43:26,153
Carter, calm down!
We need to figure out

582
00:43:26,229 --> 00:43:27,822
-what we're gonna do.
-Guys!

583
00:43:34,070 --> 00:43:35,162
Come on.

584
00:43:38,407 --> 00:43:39,909
Go, go, go!

585
00:43:39,992 --> 00:43:41,710
-Carter, lock it!
-I'm trying to fuckin' lock it, man!

586
00:43:41,786 --> 00:43:42,787
It's not working.

587
00:43:45,581 --> 00:43:47,504
-Come on!
-I'm trying!

588
00:43:47,583 --> 00:43:48,755
Move!

589
00:43:50,837 --> 00:43:51,838
Come on!

590
00:44:07,687 --> 00:44:09,189
Carter, get the ax!

591
00:44:27,707 --> 00:44:29,084
Go, go, go.

592
00:44:33,296 --> 00:44:34,969
They're coming!

593
00:44:50,479 --> 00:44:51,480
This way!

594
00:44:52,732 --> 00:44:53,904
Fuck!

595
00:45:07,330 --> 00:45:09,833
This is fucking awesome! Now what?

596
00:45:14,754 --> 00:45:18,099
I'm really sorry I set you on fire,
Scout Leader Rogers.

597
00:45:18,174 --> 00:45:19,676
But hopefully, it's not as bad as it looks.

598
00:45:22,845 --> 00:45:24,518
I used a double overhand stopper knot.

599
00:45:25,848 --> 00:45:27,521
It's hard to get out of, right?

600
00:45:30,019 --> 00:45:31,771
Okay. All right.

601
00:45:36,025 --> 00:45:39,029
Okay, now. I'll be right back.

602
00:45:39,695 --> 00:45:41,117
Just stay there.

603
00:46:10,351 --> 00:46:11,819
Dude, what the fuck?

604
00:46:12,436 --> 00:46:14,154
Haven't you had enough to eat? Jesus.

605
00:46:15,189 --> 00:46:18,193
-Carter, stop agitating them.
-What? I need a new profile pic.

606
00:46:22,029 --> 00:46:24,623
So, do you think they evacuated
everyone at the party?

607
00:46:24,699 --> 00:46:26,167
Yeah, of course. They had to.

608
00:46:27,326 --> 00:46:29,249
At least we know our parents are okay.

609
00:46:29,328 --> 00:46:30,955
-Yeah.
-Where are they?

610
00:46:31,038 --> 00:46:33,757
They went to some
lame spiritual yoga retreat.

611
00:46:33,833 --> 00:46:35,676
I think I'd rather be in here.

612
00:46:41,507 --> 00:46:43,100
I hope Augie's okay.

613
00:46:43,175 --> 00:46:45,428
-Who's Augie?
-He's our best friend.

614
00:46:45,511 --> 00:46:47,184
Well, ex-best friend now.

615
00:46:47,555 --> 00:46:48,602
Why ex?

616
00:46:48,681 --> 00:46:50,308
Because we ditched him for a party.

617
00:46:50,391 --> 00:46:51,893
Ben, we were gonna go back.

618
00:46:52,018 --> 00:46:54,066
Whatever, Carter.
We ditched him. We're bad friends.

619
00:46:54,145 --> 00:46:56,273
Why didn't you guys
just take him with you?

620
00:46:58,065 --> 00:46:59,817
You don't know Augie.

621
00:46:59,900 --> 00:47:01,652
-What?
-He's just different.

622
00:47:01,736 --> 00:47:02,828
Big geek?

623
00:47:02,903 --> 00:47:04,997
He collects deer shit
and weaves baskets.

624
00:47:05,072 --> 00:47:06,369
Okay? You do the math.

625
00:47:07,241 --> 00:47:08,333
Okay.

626
00:47:08,409 --> 00:47:09,535
Word of advice:

627
00:47:09,660 --> 00:47:11,628
Chasing parties and popularity
in high school?

628
00:47:11,704 --> 00:47:12,876
It's a total dead end.

629
00:47:12,997 --> 00:47:14,419
None of that shit will matter later.

630
00:47:14,540 --> 00:47:16,167
Trust me. I know.

631
00:47:16,250 --> 00:47:18,378
You're right, but didn't you,
like, drop out of high school?

632
00:47:18,461 --> 00:47:20,213
-No, I got my GED.
-Why?

633
00:47:20,296 --> 00:47:22,515
'Cause not everybody has
a lily-white life like you do.

634
00:47:22,590 --> 00:47:24,388
Okay. God, you're so hostile.

635
00:47:24,467 --> 00:47:27,141
No, hostile is three seconds from now
when my foot's up your ass.

636
00:47:27,219 --> 00:47:28,641
Okay, yeah. Try all you want,

637
00:47:28,721 --> 00:47:29,973
but I happen to have
a very tight asshole.

638
00:47:30,056 --> 00:47:31,558
I think I could stretch it out for you.

639
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:33,142
Well, then lube me up, baby.

640
00:47:33,225 --> 00:47:35,899
Carter! We're gonna play
the quiet game now, okay?

641
00:47:37,146 --> 00:47:39,069
All right, you know what? Fine.

642
00:47:39,732 --> 00:47:41,405
I'm over both of you.

643
00:47:50,659 --> 00:47:52,502
You're pretty good at that.

644
00:47:52,578 --> 00:47:55,081
Yeah, I guess that Whittling Badge
finally paid off.

645
00:47:59,251 --> 00:48:01,754
-What about you?
-What about me?

646
00:48:01,837 --> 00:48:04,181
How'd you learn
to use a shotgun like that?

647
00:48:05,341 --> 00:48:08,436
My ex-boyfriend was really into guns.

648
00:48:08,511 --> 00:48:11,355
He used to drag me to
the firing range once a week.

649
00:48:12,848 --> 00:48:15,522
So, no boyfriend now?

650
00:48:15,601 --> 00:48:16,944
Not if I can help it.

651
00:48:17,937 --> 00:48:21,111
-Well, why do you say that?
-I don't know.

652
00:48:21,440 --> 00:48:23,693
Let's just say, I have
really shitty taste in guys.

653
00:48:24,026 --> 00:48:26,154
I'm better off alone.

654
00:48:26,237 --> 00:48:28,080
Nobody's better off alone.

655
00:48:28,155 --> 00:48:29,577
Yeah, well, I am.

656
00:48:31,283 --> 00:48:32,956
What a beautiful moment.

657
00:48:33,869 --> 00:48:35,542
Asshole, that hurt!

658
00:48:35,621 --> 00:48:37,464
-Yeah, that was the point!
-Was that the point?

659
00:48:37,540 --> 00:48:38,792
Guys!

660
00:48:39,125 --> 00:48:41,628
-Do you hear that?
-Is that Crank That?

661
00:48:43,796 --> 00:48:45,139
They're leaving.

662
00:48:45,464 --> 00:48:47,637
-I love this song!
-You would.

663
00:48:58,727 --> 00:48:59,979
Look! Right there.

664
00:49:00,062 --> 00:49:01,063
Fuck. But they're gonna come back.

665
00:49:01,147 --> 00:49:02,194
What are we gonna do?

666
00:49:02,273 --> 00:49:03,650
-Condoms!
-What?

667
00:49:03,732 --> 00:49:06,326
Carter, give me your condoms! Hurry!

668
00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:10,414
Here. Take them and open them
and tie them together.

669
00:49:10,489 --> 00:49:11,536
Why are we doing this?

670
00:49:11,615 --> 00:49:12,741
-Just do it!
-Okay, okay.

671
00:49:12,825 --> 00:49:13,997
Here's one.

672
00:49:14,076 --> 00:49:15,419
Come on, hurry!

673
00:49:40,352 --> 00:49:42,650
Here we go. Fly fishing. it's genius.

674
00:49:43,772 --> 00:49:46,867
Go on, just a little bit.
Get it right up there.

675
00:49:46,942 --> 00:49:48,944
There you go. Come on.

676
00:49:49,028 --> 00:49:50,075
It's right up there!

677
00:49:51,864 --> 00:49:53,707
You got it, come on.

678
00:49:55,951 --> 00:49:58,124
Good work. Yes! Yes!

679
00:49:59,038 --> 00:50:00,039
No, no, no!

680
00:50:01,957 --> 00:50:03,004
Jesus!

681
00:50:03,083 --> 00:50:04,084
You got arrested?

682
00:50:04,168 --> 00:50:05,294
No, we locked ourselves in.

683
00:50:05,377 --> 00:50:06,629
-How?
-It was an accident!

684
00:50:06,712 --> 00:50:08,055
This has to be Augie.

685
00:50:08,130 --> 00:50:09,222
Augie, get the keys.

686
00:50:09,298 --> 00:50:10,550
You kicked them
into the drainpipe over there.

687
00:50:12,301 --> 00:50:13,723
-I can't reach it!
-Shit!

688
00:50:13,802 --> 00:50:16,146
-Shit, they're coming back.
-Hold on.

689
00:50:17,264 --> 00:50:19,266
What, is there a Lockpicking Badge
I'm unaware of?

690
00:50:19,975 --> 00:50:21,022
How'd you find us?

691
00:50:21,101 --> 00:50:22,353
Followed the stench of betrayal.

692
00:50:22,436 --> 00:50:23,483
Augie...

693
00:50:23,562 --> 00:50:25,815
I saw your car. I figured I'd help.

694
00:50:25,898 --> 00:50:27,571
-Augie, look, I'm really...
-Got it!

695
00:50:36,242 --> 00:50:38,586
Go, go, go!

696
00:50:43,832 --> 00:50:45,004
Close the gate!

697
00:50:53,259 --> 00:50:54,932
Oh...

698
00:50:56,929 --> 00:50:58,602
mY..

699
00:51:00,432 --> 00:51:03,106
...God.

700
00:51:03,561 --> 00:51:04,562
Carter, let's go!

701
00:51:06,689 --> 00:51:08,532
-Come on!
-Okay!

702
00:51:09,942 --> 00:51:12,365
Oh, God. I touched them!
I touched them!

703
00:51:12,444 --> 00:51:13,821
I don't think they were real.

704
00:51:18,450 --> 00:51:20,703
Fuck, my feet are killing me.

705
00:51:20,786 --> 00:51:23,209
The security checkpoint's
only a few miles away.

706
00:51:23,289 --> 00:51:25,792
Dude, I'm starving.

707
00:51:25,874 --> 00:51:29,469
How can you even think of food
when people are being eaten alive?

708
00:51:29,545 --> 00:51:32,298
You know, they say that
humans taste like pork.

709
00:51:32,381 --> 00:51:33,803
"They"?

710
00:51:33,882 --> 00:51:36,385
-Cannibals, I guess.
-Dude, I love bacon.

711
00:51:36,468 --> 00:51:37,720
Look.

712
00:51:37,803 --> 00:51:39,555
Maybe the keys are inside.

713
00:51:46,729 --> 00:51:49,573
-Jesus! This guy again?
-Someone kill him!

714
00:51:49,648 --> 00:51:52,151
Carter, we can't just keep
going around Killing people.

715
00:51:52,234 --> 00:51:54,453
-Why not?
-Because he's a human being!

716
00:51:54,528 --> 00:51:55,654
Okay. We'll see how you feel

717
00:51:55,738 --> 00:51:57,661
when he's eating your nutsack
like a street taco.

718
00:51:59,033 --> 00:52:01,286
Guys, he's getting pretty close.

719
00:52:01,368 --> 00:52:02,836
Remember our
Wilderness Safety Seminar?

720
00:52:02,911 --> 00:52:03,912
What?

721
00:52:03,996 --> 00:52:06,215
When encountering a hostile creature,
be sure to assert yourself

722
00:52:06,290 --> 00:52:07,883
in order to keep the animal at bay.

723
00:52:07,958 --> 00:52:09,210
Well, I...

724
00:52:10,669 --> 00:52:13,013
That is a zombie, not a bear, dumb-ass.

725
00:52:26,935 --> 00:52:28,061
Guys, I think he's mimicking me.

726
00:52:28,145 --> 00:52:29,442
Augie, quit messing around.

727
00:52:34,526 --> 00:52:35,573
Augie.

728
00:52:49,124 --> 00:52:50,125
What?

729
00:52:52,711 --> 00:52:54,054
Augie, what are you doing?

730
00:53:05,933 --> 00:53:07,185
What are you doing?

731
00:53:22,116 --> 00:53:23,618
Okay. Did I just drop acid,

732
00:53:23,701 --> 00:53:26,170
or are they really singing
Britney Spears with a zombie?

733
00:53:44,763 --> 00:53:46,015
Is that all of you?

734
00:53:46,098 --> 00:53:47,645
Yeah. What the hell's happening?

735
00:53:47,725 --> 00:53:50,103
Don't know yet.
Some kind of viral outbreak.

736
00:53:50,185 --> 00:53:52,529
CDC ordered a military
containment perimeter.

737
00:53:52,604 --> 00:53:53,730
Is most of the town evacuated?

738
00:53:53,814 --> 00:53:55,111
As many as we could.

739
00:53:55,190 --> 00:53:57,909
This thing hit so hard and fast,
we're still trying to contain it.

740
00:53:57,985 --> 00:53:59,908
What about everyone at the party?
Were they evacuated?

741
00:54:00,696 --> 00:54:01,868
What party?

742
00:54:43,906 --> 00:54:46,159
Well, where is everybody?

743
00:54:46,241 --> 00:54:48,915
Nobody's here. It must be a mistake.

744
00:54:49,745 --> 00:54:52,214
Yeah, 1146 Dunton Avenue. This is it.

745
00:54:52,289 --> 00:54:55,338
It's not a mistake, Carter.
Jeff sent you a fake address.

746
00:54:55,417 --> 00:54:56,589
What?

747
00:54:56,668 --> 00:54:58,261
Carter, this is a waste plant.

748
00:54:58,337 --> 00:55:00,339
You get it? it's full of shit.

749
00:55:01,840 --> 00:55:04,059
Motherfucker! God damn it!

750
00:55:04,384 --> 00:55:06,807
I can't believe he sent us
a fucking fake address!

751
00:55:06,887 --> 00:55:07,979
Why does it surprise you?

752
00:55:08,055 --> 00:55:09,102
I mean, did you actually think

753
00:55:09,181 --> 00:55:10,683
he was gonna invite us to a real party?

754
00:55:11,642 --> 00:55:12,768
Karma.

755
00:55:13,268 --> 00:55:14,394
What?

756
00:55:14,478 --> 00:55:16,105
-Nothing.
-No, speak up.

757
00:55:16,188 --> 00:55:19,488
Well, I just think it's a little ironic
that, you know, you're all upset now

758
00:55:19,566 --> 00:55:20,818
because you got ditched.

759
00:55:20,901 --> 00:55:23,529
Okay. So you're saying
that we deserve it.

760
00:55:23,612 --> 00:55:25,239
We went to your stupid campout, dude.

761
00:55:25,322 --> 00:55:26,824
You lied to me.

762
00:55:26,907 --> 00:55:28,784
We've been lying to you
for the past three years!

763
00:55:28,867 --> 00:55:30,414
-Carter!
-Going to every Scout meeting,

764
00:55:30,494 --> 00:55:31,711
every lame field trip.

765
00:55:31,787 --> 00:55:34,210
Wearing these stupid fucking clothes
so everybody can make fun of us.

766
00:55:34,289 --> 00:55:35,290
Carter, that's enough!

767
00:55:35,374 --> 00:55:37,092
Ben, you're not hiding
behind me this time.

768
00:55:37,167 --> 00:55:38,214
Tell him.

769
00:55:38,293 --> 00:55:39,419
Talk about how many times

770
00:55:39,503 --> 00:55:41,471
you said you hated Scouts,
how sick of it you were.

771
00:55:41,547 --> 00:55:43,345
-I never said that.
-Bullshit!

772
00:55:43,423 --> 00:55:44,515
No, no, no. it's fine.

773
00:55:44,591 --> 00:55:46,559
I guess it's time
for it to all come out, right?

774
00:55:47,219 --> 00:55:49,472
He's had a crush on Kendall
since sixth grade.

775
00:55:49,555 --> 00:55:50,977
-That is not true!
-Yes, it is.

776
00:55:51,056 --> 00:55:53,150
Kendall? As in my sister Kendall?

777
00:55:53,225 --> 00:55:54,647
-No.
-Dude, that's like incest.

778
00:55:54,726 --> 00:55:55,943
No, it's not, I'm not even related to her.

779
00:55:56,019 --> 00:55:57,020
So you do like her, then.

780
00:55:57,104 --> 00:55:58,606
-No, I don't like her!
-Told you.

781
00:55:58,689 --> 00:55:59,781
Shut up!

782
00:56:00,190 --> 00:56:01,191
Stop!

783
00:56:01,900 --> 00:56:04,403
Again with this shit? Jesus.

784
00:56:04,486 --> 00:56:05,988
Can't you just Walkie someone?

785
00:56:07,739 --> 00:56:09,491
Are you okay?

786
00:56:11,410 --> 00:56:13,162
Guys!

787
00:56:13,245 --> 00:56:14,963
Shit!

788
00:56:17,082 --> 00:56:18,254
Get him!

789
00:56:21,670 --> 00:56:26,176
I'm so fucking sick of zombies!

790
00:56:27,801 --> 00:56:29,974
-Yi Kes.
-Wa-wa-wee-wa.

791
00:56:35,100 --> 00:56:36,226
Shit!

792
00:56:40,606 --> 00:56:43,530
-Hello! Is anybody there?
-E vac complete.

793
00:56:43,817 --> 00:56:44,989
NO, HO. HO. rlo.We're still here!

794
00:56:45,068 --> 00:56:46,365
We have Operation Clean Up.

795
00:56:47,029 --> 00:56:50,374
Commence aerial bombing of
site at 0300. Repeat, 0300. Oven

796
00:56:50,449 --> 00:56:51,666
What?

797
00:56:51,742 --> 00:56:53,995
No, somebody help! Hello! Hello!

798
00:56:54,077 --> 00:56:56,296
Somebody help, please! Hello!

799
00:56:56,371 --> 00:56:57,418
Fuck!

800
00:56:57,497 --> 00:56:59,295
They're gonna bomb the town
in two hours?

801
00:56:59,374 --> 00:57:00,375
What are we gonna do?

802
00:57:00,459 --> 00:57:01,631
We have to find Kendall and the others!

803
00:57:01,710 --> 00:57:03,804
It's a secret party.
They could be anywhere.

804
00:57:05,130 --> 00:57:06,302
My sister's diary!

805
00:57:06,715 --> 00:57:09,468
She writes every last boring detail
of her life in there.

806
00:57:09,551 --> 00:57:12,430
I guarantee she wrote down
where the party is.

807
00:57:12,512 --> 00:57:14,014
We better get fucking going, then.

808
00:57:39,873 --> 00:57:40,874
Okay, now.

809
00:58:14,366 --> 00:58:15,788
All right, come on.

810
00:58:26,253 --> 00:58:28,881
It smells like Pixy Stix and hope in here.

811
00:58:29,131 --> 00:58:31,634
You've never been in a girl's
room before, have you?

812
00:58:31,717 --> 00:58:33,811
-Yeah, I...
-Mom doesn't count.

813
00:58:33,885 --> 00:58:35,228
Any female relative doesn't count.

814
00:58:35,303 --> 00:58:37,726
Guys! Can we focus?
Where's the diary?

815
00:58:38,223 --> 00:58:40,146
She changes the hiding place,
like, every week,

816
00:58:40,225 --> 00:58:41,772
so just spread out and start looking.

817
00:58:59,411 --> 00:59:00,913
-Did you find it?
-Nope.

818
00:59:01,413 --> 00:59:03,165
Nothing over here.

819
00:59:18,346 --> 00:59:20,519
-Did you guys hear that?
-Hear what?

820
00:59:21,933 --> 00:59:23,935
I think I heard something downstairs.

821
00:59:25,020 --> 00:59:26,317
Augie, go check it out.

822
00:59:26,438 --> 00:59:27,906
I'm not going down there by myself.

823
00:59:27,981 --> 00:59:29,483
-Go with him.
-Why me?

824
00:59:29,566 --> 00:59:31,443
Call me when your balls drop, dude.

825
00:59:37,449 --> 00:59:39,292
Don't walk so hard.

826
00:59:39,367 --> 00:59:41,540
You have squeaky floors.

827
00:59:43,622 --> 00:59:45,340
This is Carter's sister?

828
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:48,343
Yeah. That's Kendall.

829
00:59:49,336 --> 00:59:51,338
Well, she clearly won
the genetic lottery.

830
00:59:51,713 --> 00:59:54,387
Yeah. She's okay. I guess.

831
00:59:54,466 --> 00:59:55,763
Dude, she's more than okay.

832
00:59:55,842 --> 00:59:57,560
You don't have to be all cool about it.

833
00:59:59,137 --> 01:00:00,480
Shit.

834
01:00:02,557 --> 01:00:04,230
Fuck. Come on.

835
01:00:05,977 --> 01:00:07,945
So, how come you
haven't told her you like her?

836
01:00:08,021 --> 01:00:09,398
What's the point?

837
01:00:09,481 --> 01:00:11,483
She's never gonna go for a guy like me.

838
01:00:11,566 --> 01:00:13,159
And she's got a boyfriend.

839
01:00:13,235 --> 01:00:15,988
And Carter would kill me
if I touched his sister.

840
01:00:16,071 --> 01:00:18,244
Okay, look. Here's the deal.

841
01:00:18,323 --> 01:00:21,167
And don't take this the wrong way,

842
01:00:21,243 --> 01:00:23,416
but you have to man up.

843
01:00:23,495 --> 01:00:25,418
Yeah, but I suck at being that guy.

844
01:00:25,497 --> 01:00:27,090
I'm not assertive like that.

845
01:00:27,165 --> 01:00:28,166
Kiss me.

846
01:00:28,667 --> 01:00:29,634
What?

847
01:00:29,709 --> 01:00:31,177
Don't "what" me, just do it. Kiss me.

848
01:00:32,170 --> 01:00:33,217
Are you serious?

849
01:00:33,338 --> 01:00:34,931
Yeah, I'm serious.
I saw you checking out my ass earlier.

850
01:00:35,006 --> 01:00:36,258
I know you want to do it. Just kiss me.

851
01:00:36,341 --> 01:00:37,433
-No, I wasn't.
-Ben!

852
01:00:37,509 --> 01:00:39,352
-Okay, for a second I did.
-Kiss me.

853
01:00:40,428 --> 01:00:41,475
Denise, I...

854
01:00:41,555 --> 01:00:43,102
You can do it. Just go for it.

855
01:00:45,934 --> 01:00:47,151
-I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
-Fuck! Fuck.

856
01:00:47,227 --> 01:00:48,820
-I'm so sorry. Are you okay?
-I'm fine.

857
01:00:48,895 --> 01:00:49,942
See? I told you
we shouldn't have done that.

858
01:00:50,021 --> 01:00:50,988
It was a bad idea.

859
01:00:51,064 --> 01:00:52,441
No, no, no. Let's just try it again.

860
01:00:52,524 --> 01:00:54,697
No, I feel stupid.
We should look for the diary.

861
01:00:54,776 --> 01:00:55,948
Come here.

862
01:01:09,040 --> 01:01:10,041
Not bad.

863
01:01:10,876 --> 01:01:11,843
Reany?

864
01:01:11,918 --> 01:01:14,387
It wasn't, like, top five or anything.
Don't get excited.

865
01:01:14,462 --> 01:01:16,305
But, yeah, it was okay.

866
01:01:16,381 --> 01:01:19,134
When you see Kendall,
just walk straight up to her,

867
01:01:19,217 --> 01:01:20,389
lay some of that shit on her,

868
01:01:20,468 --> 01:01:21,970
and you're golden.

869
01:01:22,721 --> 01:01:24,564
Okay. Thanks.

870
01:01:29,978 --> 01:01:31,571
Guess we left it open.

871
01:01:32,564 --> 01:01:33,565
Augie.

872
01:01:37,319 --> 01:01:39,162
Ben didn't want to leave you tonight.

873
01:01:41,364 --> 01:01:43,162
It was my idea.

874
01:01:44,159 --> 01:01:47,163
What difference does it make? It's done.

875
01:01:51,750 --> 01:01:52,922
Yeah.

876
01:02:01,092 --> 01:02:02,093
Fuck!

877
01:02:13,605 --> 01:02:14,697
Come on.

878
01:02:14,773 --> 01:02:16,525
What the hell is going on down there?

879
01:02:16,608 --> 01:02:18,861
We're fine! Everything's under control!

880
01:02:41,967 --> 01:02:45,471
No! No, no, no, no.
Fucking, no! Not my ass!

881
01:02:47,264 --> 01:02:48,641
No, no, no, no!

882
01:02:51,726 --> 01:02:54,070
My ass! My ass!

883
01:02:54,145 --> 01:02:56,398
She's gumming my ass!

884
01:02:56,481 --> 01:02:57,903
Oh, my God!

885
01:02:57,983 --> 01:02:58,984
Carter!

886
01:02:59,317 --> 01:03:01,991
Oh, God! It's disgusting!

887
01:03:08,159 --> 01:03:09,752
Carter!

888
01:03:11,830 --> 01:03:13,252
Peace out, bitch!

889
01:03:17,168 --> 01:03:18,761
What the hell happened?

890
01:03:20,422 --> 01:03:22,845
Shit. Back upstairs! Back upstairs!

891
01:03:30,348 --> 01:03:33,352
-Come on, come on!
-Move it!

892
01:03:34,436 --> 01:03:35,779
That's not gonna hold them!

893
01:03:35,854 --> 01:03:37,606
-Did you find the journal?
-No! We looked everywhere!

894
01:03:37,689 --> 01:03:39,111
Guys, we got to go! Come on!

895
01:03:54,289 --> 01:03:56,041
Oh, my God! They're coming!

896
01:03:57,792 --> 01:03:59,794
Guys, if we jump,
we might be able to clear the fence!

897
01:03:59,878 --> 01:04:01,630
-What?
-Fuck it, let'sjustjump!

898
01:04:01,713 --> 01:04:03,215
The fence is like 10 feet away!

899
01:04:03,715 --> 01:04:05,888
-I'll go first!
-Go, go!

900
01:04:11,806 --> 01:04:12,898
Okay. Go, go, go!

901
01:04:19,898 --> 01:04:21,650
Augie, you got to go now!

902
01:04:22,901 --> 01:04:23,902
Hurry!

903
01:04:24,027 --> 01:04:25,074
I can't, I'm afraid of heights!

904
01:04:25,153 --> 01:04:26,746
Be more afraid of zombies! Go!

905
01:05:07,779 --> 01:05:09,531
Is that his Wiener?

906
01:05:11,116 --> 01:05:12,117
We got to do something.

907
01:05:12,617 --> 01:05:14,460
Guys, help me! I'm falling!

908
01:05:14,536 --> 01:05:16,459
Hang on to that cock, Ben!

909
01:05:16,871 --> 01:05:18,794
Guys, hurry! Help me!

910
01:05:20,458 --> 01:05:22,301
What are you doing?

911
01:05:23,294 --> 01:05:25,638
Hey! Assholesl Come and get me.

912
01:05:30,135 --> 01:05:31,478
Hurry!

913
01:05:32,804 --> 01:05:33,805
It's ripping!

914
01:05:37,308 --> 01:05:39,481
His dick's ripping!

915
01:05:58,121 --> 01:05:59,338
I got it!

916
01:06:02,333 --> 01:06:03,585
-I got it.
-Where was it?

917
01:06:03,668 --> 01:06:05,090
-Underwear drawer.
-Classic.

918
01:06:06,129 --> 01:06:07,301
Run!

919
01:06:11,843 --> 01:06:13,186
Lock it.

920
01:06:13,511 --> 01:06:15,104
Augie, get the lights.

921
01:06:16,181 --> 01:06:17,683
The power's out.

922
01:06:18,266 --> 01:06:19,939
Where the hell are we?

923
01:06:21,352 --> 01:06:22,695
Miss Fielder's house.

924
01:06:22,937 --> 01:06:24,610
I can't believe we
just chopped her head off.

925
01:06:24,689 --> 01:06:27,192
She tried to eat my ass, Augie.
She deserved it.

926
01:06:27,275 --> 01:06:29,448
Guys, we got to keep moving. Come on.

927
01:06:44,042 --> 01:06:45,385
Carter, check the window.

928
01:06:49,380 --> 01:06:51,257
Shit, they're everywhere.

929
01:06:51,341 --> 01:06:52,809
Miss Fielder's car is in the garage.

930
01:06:52,884 --> 01:06:54,978
Maybe we can get out that way.
This way.

931
01:07:10,568 --> 01:07:13,321
-What was that?
-I think something's in here.

932
01:07:15,156 --> 01:07:16,157
Fuck, cat.

933
01:07:23,331 --> 01:07:24,332
Augie?

934
01:07:24,415 --> 01:07:25,667
Dude, dude.

935
01:07:25,750 --> 01:07:27,502
-Augie.
-What?

936
01:07:27,585 --> 01:07:29,553
Don't move.

937
01:07:40,848 --> 01:07:43,271
-Did you get it?
-I got it! I got it!

938
01:07:48,606 --> 01:07:49,949
Run!

939
01:07:56,030 --> 01:07:58,374
Come on, come on, come on!

940
01:07:59,117 --> 01:08:01,791
-Open the garage door!
-It won't open!

941
01:08:02,120 --> 01:08:03,292
Go! Ben, go!

942
01:08:03,454 --> 01:08:04,580
Fuck it!

943
01:08:15,633 --> 01:08:17,431
Oh, my God. It's Scout Leader Rogers!

944
01:08:18,803 --> 01:08:21,306
-He looks like shit!
-I set him on fire.

945
01:08:22,307 --> 01:08:23,650
He tried to eat me!

946
01:08:28,146 --> 01:08:30,069
-Wait, what are you doing?
-No, don't

947
01:08:38,489 --> 01:08:39,911
Sorry, bro!

948
01:08:57,508 --> 01:08:58,555
All right, the diary said they're at

949
01:08:58,635 --> 01:08:59,761
the old rec center on Dewer Street.

950
01:08:59,844 --> 01:09:01,437
Hopefully, we're not too late.

951
01:09:01,512 --> 01:09:03,435
All right, I'll try to get help
as soon as I can.

952
01:09:03,514 --> 01:09:05,107
Just be careful.

953
01:09:13,024 --> 01:09:14,867
-Denise.
-Yeah?

954
01:09:15,777 --> 01:09:18,030
Look, I don't know what's gonna happen,

955
01:09:19,030 --> 01:09:20,373
but I just wanted to let you know that

956
01:09:20,490 --> 01:09:21,958
you're one of the coolest girls
I've ever met.

957
01:09:26,204 --> 01:09:28,457
And I hope you meet someone
that deserves you.

958
01:09:30,041 --> 01:09:31,042
Thanks.

959
01:10:00,571 --> 01:10:02,494
Guys, let's go.
We got to get to the party.

960
01:10:02,573 --> 01:10:04,951
Ben, this is a suicide mission.

961
01:10:05,034 --> 01:10:06,752
Guys, they're gonna bomb
this whole town

962
01:10:06,828 --> 01:10:07,920
in less than two hours.

963
01:10:07,995 --> 01:10:09,918
What if Denise
reaches the military in time?

964
01:10:09,997 --> 01:10:11,795
And what if she doesn't, Carter?
Then what?

965
01:10:11,874 --> 01:10:14,343
Who's gonna save them?
The police? They're gone.

966
01:10:14,419 --> 01:10:17,423
The military?
They're not coming, either.

967
01:10:18,089 --> 01:10:20,433
Guys, we're the last line of defense.

968
01:10:21,926 --> 01:10:24,429
And so what? Maybe we look
like dorks in these uniforms.

969
01:10:24,512 --> 01:10:27,436
And maybe we're a big joke
to everyone at school.

970
01:10:29,267 --> 01:10:31,269
But tonight,

971
01:10:31,352 --> 01:10:33,446
we're gonna show them what being
a real Scout's all about.

972
01:10:34,522 --> 01:10:38,618
So, are we just gonna stand here
with our thumbs up our asses?

973
01:10:39,277 --> 01:10:41,871
Or are we gonna go out there
and save the world?

974
01:10:43,197 --> 01:10:44,449
Fuck, yeah, dude.

975
01:10:45,783 --> 01:10:47,285
That was a really good speech, Ben.

976
01:10:48,035 --> 01:10:49,127
Thanks, Augie.

977
01:10:49,203 --> 01:10:50,546
Let's do it.

978
01:10:53,541 --> 01:10:55,293
The rec center's that way.

979
01:10:56,961 --> 01:10:58,963
We're making a pit stop first.

980
01:12:11,202 --> 01:12:12,954
Are you serious?

981
01:12:13,996 --> 01:12:17,296
None of my text messages
are going through, Travis.

982
01:12:17,375 --> 01:12:18,877
Don't worry about that, baby.

983
01:12:18,960 --> 01:12:20,712
Where are you taking me?

984
01:12:21,546 --> 01:12:23,640
It's a surprise.

985
01:12:23,714 --> 01:12:25,307
You need a little spanking, don't you?

986
01:12:28,719 --> 01:12:30,392
Travis, what the fuck?

987
01:12:30,721 --> 01:12:31,722
Come on.

988
01:12:32,139 --> 01:12:34,233
Okay, this place is disgusting.

989
01:12:35,476 --> 01:12:37,069
I need to examine you.

990
01:12:37,144 --> 01:12:38,646
-Get over here.
-Okay.

991
01:12:41,566 --> 01:12:43,568
God, you're so sexy.

992
01:12:43,901 --> 01:12:45,073
Thank you.

993
01:12:46,904 --> 01:12:49,077
Okay, we're not about to fuck right now.

994
01:12:49,156 --> 01:12:50,408
Why not?

995
01:12:50,992 --> 01:12:53,495
Because we've only been dating
for, like, two minutes.

996
01:12:53,578 --> 01:12:54,579
What about a blow job?

997
01:12:54,662 --> 01:12:57,256
Travis, I spent an hour trying
to find this piece of gum.

998
01:12:58,249 --> 01:12:59,592
Sucks.

999
01:13:01,752 --> 01:13:04,175
Okay, fine. You can eat me out.

1000
01:13:04,255 --> 01:13:06,178
-Really?
-Yes. You're welcome.

1001
01:13:14,849 --> 01:13:16,101
When I'm in jail

1002
01:13:16,183 --> 01:13:18,185
the first thing you do
is talk to another chick.

1003
01:13:18,269 --> 01:13:19,612
What the fuck?

1004
01:13:23,441 --> 01:13:25,944
Pervert, fuck off!

1005
01:13:29,780 --> 01:13:31,282
You serious, bro?

1006
01:13:37,747 --> 01:13:39,966
I was in jail!

1007
01:13:42,460 --> 01:13:44,713
Hello? Are you going to do it or what?

1008
01:13:59,560 --> 01:14:02,279
Your mouth's kind of cold.

1009
01:14:12,657 --> 01:14:13,658
Stop.

1010
01:14:14,659 --> 01:14:16,832
-Stop!
-Come on, babe.

1011
01:14:16,911 --> 01:14:18,834
-Stop it!
-What the fuck's your problem?

1012
01:14:18,913 --> 01:14:20,085
I'm worried about my brother.

1013
01:14:20,164 --> 01:14:21,757
He should've been here hours ago.

1014
01:14:21,832 --> 01:14:24,335
-He's not coming, babe.
-How do you know?

1015
01:14:24,418 --> 01:14:26,762
Because I gave him the wrong address.

1016
01:14:26,837 --> 01:14:28,931
-What?
-They're Scouts, Kendall!

1017
01:14:29,006 --> 01:14:31,475
Look, what'd you think,
I was gonna invite them for real?

1018
01:14:31,550 --> 01:14:34,099
-Come here.
-You are such a dick!

1019
01:14:34,178 --> 01:14:36,055
-What? You're not leaving.
-Watch me!

1020
01:14:36,138 --> 01:14:37,481
You're not going!

1021
01:14:39,308 --> 01:14:40,901
Fine, go, bitch!

1022
01:14:43,771 --> 01:14:46,445
Jesus, girl.
Get a fucking tampon, would you?

1023
01:14:57,201 --> 01:14:58,544
Someone help!

1024
01:15:00,204 --> 01:15:02,753
Help! Please, someone help!

1025
01:16:11,609 --> 01:16:14,362
All right, Scouts,
let's kick some zombie ass.

1026
01:16:49,814 --> 01:16:50,986
Boom.

1027
01:17:07,581 --> 01:17:08,582
Chloe?

1028
01:17:08,749 --> 01:17:09,750
Oh, man.

1029
01:17:12,503 --> 01:17:13,504
Nailed it.

1030
01:17:36,527 --> 01:17:38,120
What a dick.

1031
01:17:42,199 --> 01:17:43,621
Ben, they're everywhere!

1032
01:17:43,868 --> 01:17:45,290
Circle up!

1033
01:17:50,875 --> 01:17:51,876
You want some of this?

1034
01:17:51,959 --> 01:17:54,553
You assholes! Die!

1035
01:17:54,879 --> 01:17:57,723
Come on! You want a piece of me?

1036
01:18:00,217 --> 01:18:02,185
Ben! Ben!

1037
01:18:02,261 --> 01:18:04,059
Help!

1038
01:18:09,185 --> 01:18:10,311
Ben!

1039
01:18:10,394 --> 01:18:11,816
Hang on, Kendall! I'm coming!

1040
01:18:14,064 --> 01:18:15,236
Shit.

1041
01:18:15,566 --> 01:18:17,239
Shit. Shit, start! Come on!

1042
01:18:17,568 --> 01:18:18,911
Ben, look out!

1043
01:18:19,069 --> 01:18:20,070
Shit.

1044
01:18:31,415 --> 01:18:33,088
Ben, duck!

1045
01:18:39,340 --> 01:18:40,341
Ben!

1046
01:18:41,258 --> 01:18:43,761
Kendall, come down! Climb down, hurry!

1047
01:18:46,680 --> 01:18:48,182
-Are you okay?
-Yeah, I think so.

1048
01:18:48,265 --> 01:18:49,608
Guys, come on!

1049
01:18:49,725 --> 01:18:50,977
-Come on.
-Come on!

1050
01:18:51,268 --> 01:18:54,021
We got to get everyone out of here!
Let's go!

1051
01:18:54,438 --> 01:18:57,282
Everybody! Get to the stairs! Come on!

1052
01:19:04,114 --> 01:19:05,206
Let's go!

1053
01:19:05,282 --> 01:19:06,784
Come on, everybody, move!

1054
01:19:07,117 --> 01:19:10,792
Hurry up! Come on, come on! Let's go!

1055
01:19:11,038 --> 01:19:12,130
Let's go!

1056
01:19:12,456 --> 01:19:13,958
Let's go! Come on!

1057
01:19:14,124 --> 01:19:15,171
Shit!

1058
01:19:20,130 --> 01:19:21,222
What are you doing?

1059
01:19:21,298 --> 01:19:23,050
They'll follow you if we don't
lock the doors! You gotta go!

1060
01:19:23,133 --> 01:19:24,885
-What about you?
-You got to go!

1061
01:19:25,052 --> 01:19:26,395
I'm not leaving you! No!

1062
01:19:26,553 --> 01:19:28,305
Go! Go! Trust me!

1063
01:19:36,397 --> 01:19:37,740
-I'm out!
-Shit!

1064
01:19:37,898 --> 01:19:40,401
There's too many of them!
Come on, let's go! Hurry!

1065
01:19:40,818 --> 01:19:41,865
Let's go!

1066
01:19:42,569 --> 01:19:43,570
Fuck!

1067
01:19:44,571 --> 01:19:46,994
-Let's go!
-Come on!

1068
01:19:52,246 --> 01:19:53,998
Hurry, come on!

1069
01:19:54,498 --> 01:19:55,841
Go, Augie, go!

1070
01:19:56,834 --> 01:19:58,677
Run! Run!

1071
01:20:10,180 --> 01:20:11,932
Where's the door?

1072
01:20:12,016 --> 01:20:14,110
There's got to be another exit.

1073
01:20:14,184 --> 01:20:15,606
I don't see one!

1074
01:20:15,686 --> 01:20:17,359
-We're trapped.
-Shit.

1075
01:20:17,688 --> 01:20:18,985
-There's no way out of here.
-Fuck.

1076
01:20:21,358 --> 01:20:22,735
-What do we do?
-Give me your backpack.

1077
01:20:22,943 --> 01:20:24,945
What? What are you doing?

1078
01:20:30,284 --> 01:20:31,957
-What is that?
-it's a bomb.

1079
01:20:32,286 --> 01:20:34,630
-You made a bomb?
-What are you, the Taliban?

1080
01:20:34,705 --> 01:20:36,127
Either we die fast or we're eaten alive

1081
01:20:36,206 --> 01:20:37,583
and turn into one of those things!

1082
01:20:38,792 --> 01:20:40,214
Your choice.

1083
01:20:42,880 --> 01:20:44,632
-Shit.
-Carter, give me your lighter.

1084
01:20:45,883 --> 01:20:46,884
Here.

1085
01:20:51,305 --> 01:20:52,648
Are you guys ready?

1086
01:20:56,894 --> 01:20:58,567
-Wait!
-What?

1087
01:20:59,104 --> 01:21:00,151
I need to say something.

1088
01:21:00,230 --> 01:21:01,573
Ben, it's fine.

1089
01:21:01,648 --> 01:21:03,070
-You don't have to do this.
-No, I do.

1090
01:21:04,068 --> 01:21:05,741
We should have never
ditched you tonight, Augie.

1091
01:21:06,403 --> 01:21:08,497
What we did was really messed up.

1092
01:21:08,572 --> 01:21:10,916
He's right.
We've been complete D-bags.

1093
01:21:11,408 --> 01:21:13,160
It's my fault.
I never should have made you guys think

1094
01:21:13,243 --> 01:21:14,836
you had to be in Scouts forjust me.

1095
01:21:14,912 --> 01:21:16,505
No, that's just it!

1096
01:21:16,580 --> 01:21:18,833
I thought I wanted out,
but I was just worried

1097
01:21:18,916 --> 01:21:21,840
what other people were gonna think.
The truth is,

1098
01:21:23,253 --> 01:21:25,096
I love being a Scout.

1099
01:21:26,090 --> 01:21:29,094
And I love it because
it's the reason I met you guys.

1100
01:21:32,179 --> 01:21:35,353
And I know tonight's been
really crazy and fucked up,

1101
01:21:35,432 --> 01:21:36,854
but one good thing has happened.

1102
01:21:37,267 --> 01:21:38,940
And it's this, right now.

1103
01:21:40,229 --> 01:21:41,276
Us.

1104
01:21:41,438 --> 01:21:43,111
Being back together.

1105
01:21:45,776 --> 01:21:47,119
Scouts forever.

1106
01:21:50,030 --> 01:21:51,623
Scouts forever.

1107
01:21:53,784 --> 01:21:54,785
Scouts forever.

1108
01:22:01,375 --> 01:22:03,798
Ben? Is it really lame
if I hold your hand right now?

1109
01:22:04,128 --> 01:22:05,129
No.

1110
01:22:08,382 --> 01:22:10,225
God damn it. This stupid thing!

1111
01:22:11,301 --> 01:22:12,974
-What are you doing?
-it's out of fluid!

1112
01:22:13,053 --> 01:22:14,305
Here. Give me that.

1113
01:22:15,222 --> 01:22:16,644
Wait, do you have another lighter?

1114
01:22:20,477 --> 01:22:22,650
God damn it, Augie,
we were supposed to die fast!

1115
01:22:25,149 --> 01:22:26,651
This is gonna hurt so bad.

1116
01:22:26,733 --> 01:22:28,235
Come on, Augie, you can do it!

1117
01:22:28,318 --> 01:22:30,571
Don't pressure me! I hate that!

1118
01:22:32,281 --> 01:22:34,659
Yo, dipshits!
You just gonna sit there or what?

1119
01:22:36,076 --> 01:22:37,669
Where'd she come from?

1120
01:22:39,997 --> 01:22:41,499
Augie, leave it!

1121
01:22:48,964 --> 01:22:49,965
Augie, let's go!

1122
01:23:28,378 --> 01:23:29,800
Are you guys okay?

1123
01:23:29,880 --> 01:23:31,974
I'm alive. I'm alive!

1124
01:23:32,049 --> 01:23:33,801
Oh, my God! Augie!

1125
01:23:33,884 --> 01:23:35,886
-Dude! You're a genius!
-It worked!

1126
01:23:35,969 --> 01:23:37,391
That was fucking awesome!

1127
01:23:37,471 --> 01:23:38,814
-Fuck, yeah, man!
-It worked!

1128
01:23:40,891 --> 01:23:42,188
What the fuck?

1129
01:23:42,643 --> 01:23:44,395
Is that Scout Leader Rogers?

1130
01:23:46,897 --> 01:23:49,025
You got to hand it to him.
The man is a fighter.

1131
01:23:50,317 --> 01:23:52,911
Shit. Does anybody have a weapon?

1132
01:23:52,986 --> 01:23:55,489
There's got to be
something around here.

1133
01:24:13,257 --> 01:24:15,885
Every goddamn time!

1134
01:24:27,271 --> 01:24:28,693
Now you decide to show up.

1135
01:24:50,043 --> 01:24:51,135
Evacuation Heet

1136
01:24:51,211 --> 01:24:52,212
moving to secondary location.

1137
01:24:52,296 --> 01:24:53,718
Dude, you look like shit.

1138
01:24:53,797 --> 01:24:56,220
Yeah, well, what do you expect?
I've been killing zombies all night.

1139
01:24:56,300 --> 01:24:57,893
Yeah, you were kind of
badass last night.

1140
01:24:59,469 --> 01:25:00,937
Well, thanks for coming back.

1141
01:25:01,013 --> 01:25:02,390
Somebody's got to keep
saving your ass.

1142
01:25:02,472 --> 01:25:03,815
Yeah, I guess so.

1143
01:25:04,474 --> 01:25:07,819
So, are we gonna
hang out after this, or...

1144
01:25:08,228 --> 01:25:10,322
Come on, I feel like
the four of us are a team now.

1145
01:25:10,397 --> 01:25:11,444
Relax, dude.

1146
01:25:11,523 --> 01:25:14,026
You've got some business
to take care of right now.

1147
01:25:18,322 --> 01:25:20,165
Go for it. You got this.

1148
01:25:20,991 --> 01:25:23,119
-All right.
-Go.

1149
01:25:28,332 --> 01:25:30,676
I am so happy that you're okay.

1150
01:25:34,796 --> 01:25:37,640
That's so sweet. Up top!

1151
01:25:37,841 --> 01:25:39,434
Dude, I'm not high-fiving that.

1152
01:25:39,509 --> 01:25:40,601
Come on.

1153
01:25:40,677 --> 01:25:42,600
You think I'm high-fiving that?

1154
01:25:42,679 --> 01:25:43,680
Come on!

1155
01:25:44,681 --> 01:25:46,024
Look at them!

1156
01:25:50,228 --> 01:25:51,571
Who are you?

1157
01:25:52,105 --> 01:25:53,448
I'm a Scout.

1158
01:25:58,028 --> 01:25:59,120
All right, well, this just means

1159
01:25:59,196 --> 01:26:00,448
I'm gonna fuck his mom.

1160
01:26:00,530 --> 01:26:01,702
What?

1161
01:28:26,927 --> 01:28:28,600
Come on.

1162
01:28:30,806 --> 01:28:32,103
The end.

1163
01:28:34,806 --> 01:28:37,103
Fixed & Synced By MoUsTaFa ZaKi