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a guest Mar 6th, 2012 165 Never
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  1. So I will gladly address to the community that I'm upset and angry and
  2. that I've made a mistake or error in judgement if you will, last night
  3. here at the space. But I am in fact a human being and if you can't
  4. already tell, a pretty OPEN one at that. I feel the best approach to
  5. everything is honesty. With that being said, I am admitting that I
  6. made a mistake of getting plastered in the space last night. My
  7. roommate told me I came storming home and that I was screaming and
  8. crying in tears and yelling out the window and slamming doors and just
  9. all KINDS of drama. I'm really glad I did, because we both finally got
  10. to sit down and catch up with one another and we had an amazing
  11. conversation.
  13. From talking to her, I've sort of come to terms with the fact that I'm
  14. a mild or stage 1 alcoholic, with an emphasis on binge drinking. I've
  15. been drinking a lot lately, but I know I'm entirely capable of
  16. stopping myself, and I have gone days, weeks, months, and even years
  17. at a time without drinking. The very truth of the matter is I hate
  18. binge drinking and I hate hangovers, and I hate that I do it a lot.
  19. But what I hate more is stress and anxiety. Hence the viscous cycle. I
  20. show up to Noisebridge all the damn time because for once in my life
  21. I've found something I truly believe in and am willingly volunteering
  22. my time to get involved in. This place, even WITH ALLLLL of its drama
  23. is fucking awesome. And finally I feel like I've found a place where I
  24. can be surrounded by people I identify with: Geeks and nerds if you
  25. will. However nerds and geeks can be stressful to deal with at times,
  26. and even though I love being around geeks and nerds like myself, we
  27. often lack the ability to be socially mature with one another and we
  28. do "stupid things in rooms full of smart people" and therefore we have
  29. problems that we all need to get together and discuss IN PERSON, not
  30. through email, Noisebridge Disgust, and definitely not at a Tuesday
  31. night meeting.
  33. Speaking of which, I hate to digress and go off topic but one of my
  34. biggest problems that I seem to be having lately is with my
  35. relationship that I have with a person I literally see everyday in
  36. this space. We all know who I'm talking about here, and if not I'm
  37. sure someone can fill you in but I choose not to name names, because I
  38. feel it's the courteous and polite thing to do. But yeah, it sure
  39. fuckin feels like a relationship with all the bickering and arguing
  40. that we do with one another. Although I realize we both have very many
  41. things in common in the sense that like me at times he can be rather
  42. INTENSE, and right now I want to ask him to
  44. A. Please remove whatever video footage he has of me in his
  45. possession, and if he's already gone viral with it, I'm making a
  46. polite request that he please take it down. I've spoken with my mother
  47. about this, and even though she has my support, we both don't want
  48. this to turn into a legal battle.
  49. B. I am politely requesting that he takes his own advice that he gave
  50. to me and give me my personal space. As in addition to not talking to
  51. me, not doing things like taking my top Ramen and redistributing it to
  52. everyone else, or moving shit around without giving proper notice
  53. first PLEASE. If he values my friendship with him, I will gladly talk
  54. with him at a later date and time but currently it's beginning to be a
  55. little too much for me to deal with and I for one am not willing to
  56. cause more damage than I already have with our friendship. Because, I
  57. don't know.... our friendship matters to me?
  58. C. Please respect that I do love him a lot, and that I'm really sorry
  59. for all of the mean and horrible things I've said and done. I want to
  60. work out some sort of conflict resolution where we both can compromise
  61. and work things out for the both of us. I'm so fucking done with
  62. fighting, GOD!!!!
  64. Now that I'm trying to make amends, I would also like to apologize to
  65. the community for being a belligerent asshole last night. I'm not
  66. going to make any promises about leaving the hackerspace or quitting
  67. drinking outright. I don't need to have a Noisebridge intervention and
  68. I don't want to personally show up to tonight's meeting because there
  69. will be Noisetrolls present, gleefully poking my naked body with
  70. pitchforks sort of like the way they were doing to me last night.
  71. Middle finger to all of you for that btw. I personally felt like I was
  72. being treated like an abused dog for pooping on the floor and I'm very
  73. appalled by what I can vaguely remember last night. If it wasn't for
  74. someone I truly appreciate politely pulling me aside and asking me
  75. nicely to leave, I would have never left and I probably would have
  76. done something incredibly foolish and I would've lashed out in anger.
  77. SOUND FAMILIAR GUYS?!?! This whole Stanford Prison Experiment is going
  78. on right here at Noisebridge, and I got to play the part of the
  79. prisoner last night, while everyone else got to play guards.
  81. So without further ado, I'm going to actually come tonight to announce
  82. to everyone at the meeting that they can read this email, but
  83. otherwise I don't want to show up to my own witch trial which will
  84. ultimately result in me being burned as a heretic, and I'm going to
  85. actually spend my time um... "hacking" something or at least focus my
  86. time on doing something other than socializing. Like being productive,
  87. sort of like what I was doing last night while washing the dishes or
  88. learning how to design my new blog which is REALLLY funny btw. It's
  89. going to be promoted as soon as you google "Noisebridge" and find it
  90. yourself. Then I'm going to talk to that one other really awesome
  91. chick and have her teach me how to create my own clothes. YAYYYYYY!
  93. That's all,
  95. Justin Patrick Doer-r
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