Blue visits Boris

Blue gazed at the metal door in front of her. It seemed surprisingly small, an anomaly made more notable by the fact the door was attached to something so unrelentingly huge like Boris. Still, she knew she needed to go in. She’d promised Tinka she’d install a new neural cable into (squishy) Boris’ skull, but that required going into the Titan’s body, something she had always shied away from in the past. Not this time though. This time she wasn’t going to back down, that’s not Orky at all. This time she was going to face her fear and head into the beast, like a true Ork would.

“You dere, state your bizness” A voice emanated from a little speaker above the door.
“I’m Blue, I’m ‘ere to install a new nyooral implant f’r Boris”
“A’right den, come in. But no muckin’ about, we’s got pro-see-jer to follow”

The door opened slowly. Blue saw that it was at least a foot thick, and made of solid steel. When it was completely open, she gingerly stepped inside. When her eyes adjusted to the lack of light, she saw that the room was actually fairly small, and filled with chain link fencing, forming a sort of cage around the doorway. The only illumination in the room was a spotlight, aimed in her direction.

“Now, it’s my duty t’ in-form yew that under secshun 5-7 of da- Hold on, you ain’t no Grot. Yer blue!”
“Oh, I didn’t know ya knew me! Yeah, I’m Blue, I’m-”
“Shaddup ya git, I don’t know yew. I’m sayin’ yer blue. Not green. You ain’t no Grot. Boys!”
“No, no, I am a Grot. I am. Honest. I’m ‘ere because Big Mek Tinka Zizzbitz told me to”
“Big Mek Tinka? Hm” Blue could hear the sound of rustling papers, followed by a sigh. “Alright, in DAT case, it’s my duty t’ in-form yew dat under secshun 8-2 am-end-mint B, yew must report to da ‘Ed Councillor right now. Gork be wit’ you. Boys.”

Two Grots clad in rough squig leathers, both with a shield shaped badge, appeared in the cage next to her. Each one roughly grabbed an arm, and frog-marched Blue down a dingy, dripping corridor. Despite her attempt to stay fearless and steely, Blue was beginning to get a bit frightened by the situation she’d found herself in. She followed the security-grots without question. Eventually, they reached another set of doors. One of the grots pushed a button, which pinged merrily. The doors slid open, and Blue was pushed into a small metal box, followed by the two grots. The grot pushed another button. With another ping, the doors slid shut, and the box began to move.

Blue felt herself heading upwards in the metal box, pulled by some unknown force. This was a first for her, she’d never been in such a contraption before, and she’d be a lying git if she said she enjoyed it. After what seemed like an age, the box stopped moving and the doors slid open. Her senses were immediately assaulted from all directions. Sights, smells, sounds, the Grot marketplace was a grimy paradise, unimaginably chaotic but with a clear sense of order. Blue had never expected to see something like this. Outside, the Orks pretty much krumped one another to get what they wanted. Here, grots were buying, selling haggling, shouting, and not one hint of krumping.

“Getcha ‘ot squig tea ‘ere! Much cheaper dan da stuff from dat stall over dere!”
“Shootas, all shapes ‘nd sizes, one for every grot! Show yer’ Shootist identity card fer a discount!”
“Genuine hair squigs! Become a new grot! The newest fashun!”
“Choppas, choppas, choppas! I’ve got more chainswords dan sense! Get ‘em while they’re cheap! Dis stall is affiliated wit’ da Choppist’s guild!”

Blue walked as if in a trance through the marketplace, the grots steering her this way and that, finding their way through the maze-like market. They eventually found another set of sliding doors, sending Blue crashing out of her daze. Not another bloody lifting box, she thought.

They all got in, and the steel coffin started moving upwards again. And it kept moving. And moving. And moving. Blue began to wonder if they were ever going to reach where they were meant to be going, or if the box was actually just wobbling around on the same spot. Knowing Grot tech, it could well be. Eventually, though, the doors opened, onto yet another feast for the eyes.

The Council Chambers and Head Offices (named after their location, she later discovered) were a particularly special sight. Gone was the grime, the muck and the rust. In its place was brushed metal and reflective surfaces, everything GLEAMED. There were even coloured bits of paper on the walls, they seem to have been painted, but Blue couldn’t work out why anyone would paint something that wasn’t armour or tech.

Grots were milling around the area, carrying stacks of paper, talking to each other, and generally acting as if Blue wasn’t there. She was surprised to see that they all were wearing what looked to be some sort of cloth armour, but with a flappy hangy bit.

“They’re called ‘soots and tyes’”, muttered one of the Security-Grots, “Unorky if y’ ask me”.

I’ll post some more later on. Hope you’ve enjoyed it so far though, I’ll collect it all together into a pastebin or something eventually.