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Ceraph:

It'll probably be easier if I typed it since I don't know if I'll be able to catch you later on.
It's fine and I understand and I get that you're sorry, however the main thing that annoyed me was the fact of how it was said and handled in that situation. Yes Luxx is my friend however I would've reacted the same whether it was done by someone else including yourself. Now as for the bard situation considering you don't play bard on the high end spectrum you don't know whats going on but basically Tu does put out good dps when he was alive but the fact of the matter is when you play a certain class there are a specific set of roles that you must fufill when doing and he probably got about 45% of them done.

Yes he did occasionally pop foes which he probably couldn't pop more considering he died so damn much,  he never used refresh so that limited healing as well as damage that me and Ron can put out and also not handling mechanics well at all costing us an ridiculous amount of M.P. to raise him puts us back even further basically its was the equivalent of just having another caster for the most part. Considering my back up class is bard it aggravates me when I don't see a bard handling their utility like they should be its there for a reason it's like a paladin not using Divine Veil. Luxx might not have the highest dps but there are a series of factors that play into that out of everyone in the group yourself, Ron and Hector were the only ones who were on Kefka or have killed Kefka prior to us forming meaning you have the most experience as well as knowing how to maximize damage. The rest of us are still trying to get our footing as best as possible and for some adaptation does take a bit longer for others. In short until you have mechanics mastered so even though it may be nice seeing someone hitting high numbers it doesn't mean much if they're tanking the floor half of the run. I'd rather have someone with lower dps but plays its safe and stays alive more. Dead dps is no dps.

Now as for the situation that is mainly in question, I'll give you another chance but I want you to heed my words carefully. It's not always about what you say but how you say it. If you use a certain tone in how you say things I can be received incorrectly. This happens to me as well I understand you reasoning but the delivery was off. I'd recommend reading discord more thoroughly to make sure you haven't missed anything important. Start talking more because for a period of time I did want to get to know you, that why I asked for your name but, you preferred to be called Chu and so I felt that you wanted to keep things distant so I stopped pursuing. I would love to be in a static where it feels like the people I play with are like friends instead of just occasional people I run with two days week. Tempers flare and people do get mad I get that I've done this dance on multiple occasions but I believe that once we get to a point where we know each other its easier to feel each other out more and its hard to do so if you don't talk. Literally the only time we hear something from you is if it's a complaint about someone messing up or killing you or if you mess up. I've been on 14 for almost 5 years now and out of all the statics I've been in from that time I'd have to say that I've only had one perfect static and that was in ARR, I would love for this to be the next thing. Interaction is key and in your case you have a lot to prove to everyone at the moment because what you've shown us so far hasn't been the best of what I'd like to believe you are.

Now I will admit I have a short temperament so bare with me I'm not perfect and there are a lot of things I could do better and I'm still learning so I apologize if I fuck up a lot. But I don't want things to get to a point where there is no enjoyment from it all that's the whole point of playing video games.

Tuesday was probably the first day I genuinely enjoyed raid and I hope that we can have more like that but in all seriousness though if something is bothering you say so we all have our days and our moments but we won't know if you don't tell us we're only getting what you give us and with you not talking that isnt much.

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Chu:

You're completely right on comparing Tu and Luxx in terms of dps, and I should have taken more time in considering all the angles instead of just the dps chart, so I really am sorry about that. I never would have compared the two in the first case, except that Luxx had requested we be open to a permanent replacement, so I did just that and saw a bard who pulled decent numbers and asked. Of course, that's flawed for all the reasons you listed, but I didn't see that at the time.

I fully realize that it's how I say it that matters most, which is why I wanted to have this talk over voice rather than chat. I rely on tone in voice way more than I probably should being I type a lot in raid. I've been burned a lot by talking in raid in the past, so I had found it was better if I just shut my mouth, and I'm still trying to snap out of that. Let me clarify the name thing though... if I could get away with being called Chu in real life, I would. I just literally do not like my real name--it makes me feel like I'm a farmer, and that's a ridiculous image for me.

It's the same for me. My last amazing FC was also my first. We had formed up before the game had even started, talking for hours on chat, and doing the beta test weekends together. It was a dream, and I've longed for the same environment ever since.
I have to disagree with having a lot to prove though. If this were an elite and world progression raid group where all we did was want to raid together, then you'd be right. However, if the aim is to be friends, then I should be treated as a friend in turn instead of constantly working to make sure that my ass isn't dumped on the side of the street. Friends don't make other friends prove themselves; they forgive them for their flaws, tell them it bothers them, and move on because they know their friend is a good person.

I don't mind that you're still learning and if you fuck up a lot. I get that the team is still learning, and that's perfectly fine. I have literally no problem with people messing up while they're still getting a hang of the mechanics. Where I get frustrated is when I see you guys messing up when I know you're better than that, because I've seen all of you perform amazingly at the same thing. Random mistakes will happen, I do them too, but that doesn't stop it from getting frustrating, and I'm sure you can empathize with that.

I'm going to try talking more in chat, but please understand that it makes it hard if there's a clear tension in the air. I have a very reflective personality, and have trouble breaking the mood if it's somber.(edited)
That being said, if it seems like I'm out of it next week, it's because I am. My girlfriend has me helping with her cosplay project, and it's essentially doing 3 months of work in 2 weeks
So I may be a little off my rocker in terms of sanity lol