Etiquette

[Classic FR] 1980

Nov 9th, 2012
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  1. >Day released in 1980 in Equestria.
  2. >Go through the usual morning routine.
  3. >You're just getting out of the shower when...
  4. >Knock knock.
  5. >You wrap a handful of towels around your waist and go to answer it.
  6. >These things were way too fucking small.
  7. >Guess who?
  8. >It's Fucking Fluttershy.
  9. What do you want, Flutters?
  10. >She notices you in your bathing attire (ie. mostly naked) and turns beet red.
  11. >"Oh, umm... I just thought... umm..."
  12. Spit it out, I don't have all day.
  13. >Actually, you do. You don't really do anything here except listen to yourself getting fatter.
  14. >She squeaks.
  15. >"Well umm... Pinkie is having a umm... family reunion party and... everyone's invited so I thought-"
  16. A party huh?
  17. >You stroke your chin with a hand in contemplation.
  18. >Pinkie's parties are positively pleasant.
  19. >Twilight, get out of my head.
  20. >But seriously, you might as well go or you'll end up melding with your floor from lack of fuck-giving.
  21. >You shoot your right finger out to point at Banana Hush and take a triumphant pose.
  22. I'll take the case!
  23. >Fluttershy tenses and meeps. "Wha- what does that mean?"
  24. It means I'll go.
  25. >She squees and flaps her wings excitedly.
  26. >"Yay."
  27. >Fast-forward to the party.
  28. >You and Rarity are arriving late because you needed to have her make an emergency set of nice clothing for you.
  29. >That and because she always arrives 'fashionably late.'
  30. >You knock on the door to Sugarcube Corner and Pinkie answers.
  31. >The party's in full swing.
  32. >Balloons, streamers, music, cakes, Cakes, party games. Everything's here.
  33. >Pinkie sure knows how to throw a party.
  34. >"OhMyGoshI'mSoGladYouCouldMakeIt!" Pinkie babbles as she pushes the two of you inside.
  35.  
  36. >You mingle with the other guests.
  37. >You politely introduce yourself to Pinkie's sisters, Inkie and Blinkie.
  38. >They seem like nice p0nies.
  39. >They farm rocks for a living, so you have that whole 'doing absolutely nothing productive all day' thing in common.
  40. >You saunter over to the punch table and start talking to an Amish-looking stallion.
  41. >He says his name is Clyde and that he's Pinkie's dad.
  42. >He takes you over to a plain-looking mare.
  43. >"And this is my wife, Mrs. Pie."
  44. >You exchange pleasantries and eventually go back to mingle with the Mane Six, sans Flutters and Pinkie.
  45. >You're out on the dance floor, two-stepping with AJ when Pinkie comes over some sort of loudspeaker.
  46. >"Heeeey everyp0ny! Hope you like the party! Right now, the Pie family is going to do a special show out in the back."
  47. >Eveyp0ny heads outside.
  48. >There are white-frosted cupcakes dotting the ground in lines.
  49. >Little, p0ny-sized walls are set up around the desserts.
  50. >Inkie is painted some Lyra-esque teal.
  51. >Blinkie is the same red as Big Mac.
  52. >And Clyde.
  53. >Poor Clyde. He's painted AJ-color and looks like he lost every single fuck he had playing slots.
  54. >And then there's Fluttershy.
  55. >She's wearing a huge yellow ball like she's starring in a 3rd grade play about the solar system.
  56. Fluttershy, what the hell are you doing?
  57. >She just smiles at you and starts trotting down the paths of cupcakes.
  58. >She's eats them, chanting "Wakka W-Wakka" as the Pie's chase her around the yard.
  59. >She trots up to you and asks, "Is Mrs. Pac-man your fetish, Anon?"
  60. NO.
  61. >You walk out of Sugarcube Corner and slam every door on your way home.
  62. >Fucking WakkaShy.
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