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REAL:

A shield for one is good. A shield for everyone is even better. (Rhystic Shield)

The amorphous, magically animated residue known as the Fathom Sludge lurks in the Hagra Cistern, attacking its prey with pseudopods and dragging it down to be digested. (Tar Snare)

The penultimate step of the ritual involves bathing in a delicious glaze. (Dragon's Herald)

It *is* the thing that goes bump in the night. (Mindslicer)

"Ow! Ow ow ow! Oooh, ow, OW!" (Wall of Caltrops)

"Your nightmares inspire me, Dack!" (Duress) [???]

"Smarter than death? Let's see you outsmart my mace, necromancer!" (Ash Zealot)

Don't worry about provoking grizzly bears; they come that way. (Grizzly Bears)

"I swore to take one head for each member of my family they killed. My task is nowhere near its end." (Relentless Hunter)

"All these old relics have one thing in common. Every last one of them is made of smithereens." (Smash to Smithereens)

"Consider this: a shepherd turns on her flock. Why?"
- Tamiyo's journal (Clue token)

"I will join you so that you will not yet join me." (Drogskol Shieldmate)

Bores ruin a party. Boars are party to ruin. (Crashing Boars)

Basic senses like sight and taste are reserved for those in power. (Phyrexian Revoker)

"Your creations are effective, Sheoldred, but we must unite the flesh, not merely flay it."
—Elesh Norn, Grand Cenobite (Skinrender)

"I have trained in all three schools of magic." (Naya Battlemage)

FAKE:

"Kill them all, and let me sort them out."
- Erebos

"Some people prefer subtlety. They're dead."
— Jaya Ballard, Task Mage

O Mother! Your hair is the golden spilling light of a thousand justices!
--Song of All, Canto 847

It's a plague on both your houses.

It doesn't mince words. It minces worlds.

There's more than one way to crack a skull.

"I could promise you a quick death. But it would be a lie."

Goblins die the same way they're born. Covered in goop and screaming "AIIIEEEE!"

"This is the end, Sorin. The end of you, and the end of Innistrad. And soon, the end of other planes too."
- Nahiri

His best quality is that he's a perfectionist. His worst quality is that he's an arsonist.

NOT FAKE OR REAL

Manipulated correctly, friends were like better zombies.