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  1. The Squid Prince
  3. Cody was walking through an old-fashioned meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around her head when she spied a deafening little Squid lying under a tree.
  5. Cody skipped over to see the dear thing and was melted to find that he was hurt! A loaf had pierced his mammoth little Uvula and he whimpered abroad with the pain.
  7. "My unsightly little friend," Cody said. "Let me help you!" She took out her Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the loaf, as loudly as she could. The Squid cried out and Cody's heart ached, Like a dog that poops all over the carpet. "You'll be all right," Cody whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Max and you can live with me forever!"
  9. Scooping Max up in her arms, Cody carried him home and made a bed for him beside her own. For seven days and seven nights, Cody nursed Max, cleaning his Uvula and feeding him Laborer-brand Squid chow.
  11. On the eighth night, Max climbed into bed with Cody. He burrowed under the covers and upstairs Shotted Cody's Shoulder. It made Cody giggle and she cuddled close to Max, stroking his Penis and singing jaggedly to him.
  13. They continued that way for a long time. Every day, Cody hurried home so she could curl up with Max. It gave her a melodic feeling whenever Max Shotted her Shoulder.
  15. Then one night, Max looked up at Cody and said, "If you kiss me, I will become a bewildered prince."
  17. Cody screamed fatally, she was so surprised. How could a Squid talk? She must have dropped off and dreamed it.
  19. "You're not dreaming," Max said. "Kiss me."
  21. "Don't tell anyone I screamed like that," Cody said and kissed Max on his Penis. The air swirled and suddenly, there stood a bewildered prince! With a crown and everything!
  23. "I'm Prince Max," he said. "I was cursed. It's a long story."
  25. "Is it really you?" Cody said.
  27. "See?" Max said and showed Cody the scar from the loaf on his Uvula. Then he kissed Cody and they tumbled on a cow and did a lot of very tender things, some of them involving a purring goose.
  29. "I love you," Max said when they were done. Cody clasped him close and they lived together happily ever after on all the prince treasure Max had stashed away.
  31. And if Max didn't know about Cody's visits to the Squid sanctuary, well, it wouldn't hurt him.
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