Me

	IF YOU ARE ANY OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS OR ANYONE WHO KNOWS MY FAMILY AND FOLLOWS ME ON TWITTER OR HAPPEN TO FIND THIS PASTEBIN, DO NOT TELL THE REST OF THE FAMILY ABOUT THIS PLEASE. YOU ARE PUTTING MY WELL-BEING AT RISK BY DOING SO AND I AM NOT READY FOR THIS DISCUSSION WITH THEM. THANK YOU.

	Hi I'm Chris, a.k.a. Mr_Shasta, and I like men in addition to women. Everyone I'm close to knows about this fact and I appreciate them for accepting me for who I am. I've known this about myself for most of my adult life and I've suppressed this side of myself for most of my teens, primarily due to my family's religion. I'm tired of hiding this fact and I'm tired of hiding myself from others because I'm afraid that them knowing this about me will drive them away from me. I've had too many days/nights where I hear about something in the news affecting LGBT+ people negatively and just crumpled up and quit that day because I know it just brings people like me 1 step further away from being able to be a functioning "normal" member of society like everyone else. So I decided that from here on out, I won't be hiding this part of me any more. I'm going to display this fact about myself publicly on my twitter, I'm going to display the LGBTQIA+ tag on my stream, if someone asks about me I'm going to say this to them, and I won't ever stop doing any of this. Now more than ever it's extremely important that I display myself loudly and proudly and be a role model for others who might also be struggling with what I've been going through for a long time, so that's what I'm here to do from this day forward.

	This has affected me mentally for far too long and I'm tired of keeping this all within me. Who I am shouldn't have to be a secret and it's complete bs that this is the society we live in that I have to hide myself from my own family and in general just so I can function and be "normal" like everyone else. Being closeted for so long has left me with a big inferiority complex, and I feel it in most everything I do, from getting bopped in a speedrun to losing a set in Smash, even if it's just friendlies. I can't handle myself well when I'm noticeably worse at something than someone else, when I don't improve as fast as others do, or when I don't pick up on something like someone else does, and I have a very hard time changing my behavior whatsoever in regards to any of these. This idea more than likely comes from the fact that I've been closeted and afraid of the repercussions of just being myself for so long, as I've felt inferior to everyone who can just normally be who they are in public because I can't have what they have. Additionally I've felt unsafe most of the time when around my parents because for many many years I've been afraid that they'd discover the fact that I like guys too and I'd be disowned and not be allowed to see the rest of my family for the rest of my life. Now that I'm no longer living in my parents' house, I feel like I can safely make this public knowledge, and if this backfires on me in the end, at least I'll be safe in my own place with people that care about me for who I am, not someone I'm not.

	Speaking of people that care about me for who I am, I also want to say that I've been in a relationship with someone for over a year now, and unfortunately have had to keep this a secret for a long while for fear of persecution or family finding out. I love Leaf FC. He understands me, appreciates me for who I am, we click very well together, and I think he's mega cute!! He's also very talented and has a lot going for him in general. We moved in together in April on the same day that I moved out of my parents' house, and I'm very happy with that decision and do not regret it one bit! I love him so much!!! <3 From now on, I'll be talking about him and referring to the fact we're together everywhere online, on my Twitter, my Twitch, and my Discord primarily. Please follow him if you see this @LeafFC thank you <3

	To me, liking the same sex isn't something that's a big deal. I want to live in a world where this is something that isn't looked down upon some day. It's only a big deal to me in the fact that I have to hide myself because of the potentially very serious repercussions of this being public knowledge. Obviously my identity is important to me, as I wouldn't be in this situation for so long if it wasn't, but to me liking guys is equivalent to liking certain types of music or certain types of video games. It's just one of those things that everyone has a preference for. Unfortunately when it comes to sexual/romantic preference, many people have strong and deadly opinions if you like the same gender, even though it's none of their business at all!

	I'm going to bring up my religion now, but this won't be bashing it. This just heavily ties into my own personal story regarding my bisexuality and I want you all to hopefully understand where I'm coming from. I'm now going to dump some thoughts here I've had over the years regarding religion that have lead me to where I am now. I mean everything I say here with good intent and I hope it sparks some thinking from you all. I'm not up for debate on any of these points.

	I personally believe religion can be a good thing for people as a guide to living their life, plus I respect my religious followers and always will if they respect me. Since I mentioned it briefly earlier, I'm just going to talk a bit about my experience with it and how it relates to this part of myself. I've been raised Catholic my whole life, went to church every Sunday with my family for many many years, went to a Catholic high school for 4 years, and even became a confirmed Catholic in the church when I was 16. I feel like over the years I've become a better and more well-rounded person from these experiences! However after I graduated, I stopped practicing the religion entirely. I felt like I was Catholic out of obligation and not because I wanted to be. If I didn't practice, my parents would hate or disown me, which probably isn't true but you never know honestly. When I stopped practicing for so long, I began to realize and look back on a lot of things. Keep in mind all these thoughts are what lead me to where I am now, and they're all from the perspective of an 18 year old just out of high school trying to find himself:

- "'Love your neighbor as yourself' There is no commandment greater than these" Mark 12:31. This is a phrase from the Bible that has stuck with me throughout my life and something I always have and always will heavily believe in. The many lessons and lectures I've had in regards to this one phrase have taught me throughout my life that everyone deserves a chance no matter who they are, their past, and who they are as a person. So why has a phrase like this been forgotten by so many people? why are Catholics, Christians, Protestants, a lot of people who believes in God, etc. so ignorant to this? Do we just conveniently forget to treat our fellow human beings like equals? Why does anyone LGBT+ get persecuted for being who they are? I've never thought this was fair for anyone because I've never been mistreated by anyone lesbian, gay, bi, trans, etc. so there's no reason to not love my neighbor as I love myself. Seeing how these innocent people are treated just for being themselves made me upset at the time, but also made some more important thoughts about myself that I repressed resurface:

- High school was the time when I started having feelings for people in general. They were rare but they were definitely there. Every time I saw someone who I was attracted to in high school who wasn't a girl, I would get embarrassed, I couldn't look at them directly, I'd stumble over my words, and sometimes I would hit my head or hurt myself in some way when no one's looking for having thoughts like this. This was because I was taught my whole life by my religion, my parents, and many others that being attracted to the same sex and being in a homosexual relationship was wrong and I would suffer eternal damnation for it. But when you have feelings like this many times throughout your life to the point where you can't ignore them any more, it makes me question if I was just made to be eternally damned from the beginning and I couldn't do anything about it. Was I going to end up like the people I've seen in the news who were being persecuted for similar reasons to what I was feeling right now if I acted upon those feelings and were open about it?

	Thoughts like these have lead me to be closeted about myself for fear of being persecuted, disowned, or otherwise hated by my family and my peers. I hope me dumping these thoughts I've had for years helped you realize my perspective on everything and why it's gotten to this point

	Now with all of that out of the way, I want to say more about why I've now decided to come out and be open about my bisexuality. Quite simply I don't want more people to go through the mental anguish, gymnastics, and depression that I've gone through as a result of being closeted about who I am for so long. In this day and age where people of power are taking more and more rights away from LGBT+ people just because they are how they are, it's important to be open about who you are and let others know that they're not alone. With Pride Month putting more spotlight on LGBT+ people and many many people showing their support, I wanted to be one more person that people can turn to as a role model and hopefully help them understand themselves more as a result of me being open about myself from here on out.

	That's about all I have to say for now. Thank you everyone who read through this to the end. I hope everyone who reads this comes to accept me for who I am and knows that this is really hard to me to do in the first place. Any love and support you can throw my way is appreciated more than you would know. My hope with releasing this publicly is that I can be more like myself and feel less repressed as a whole for being who I am, and destroying all the mental baggage I've been carrying all these years regarding my bisexuality. This is just the first step for me, and I'm looking forward to (hopefully) a brighter future now that I've gotten this all out! Keep being you, because you're beautiful and deserve happiness :>