Anon's Corruption: Part 1

>Be Twilight Sparkle.
>Be currently frantically searching for the Helements of Armory.
>You mean Elements of Harmony.
>You can’t remember where you last put them... AGAIN.
>It was in one of these books.
>”Twilight...”
“NOT NOW SPIKE. Can’t you see I’m busy?”
>Your dragon slav- er... “assistant” is bothering you again.
>He’s probably hungry since you forgot to feed him last night.
>Well boo hoo.
>It’s not like he hasn’t gone a few days without food before.
>And if you don’t find those precious magic mcguffins, everybody’s going hungry.
>Permanently.
>”Twi... Calm down. Let me-“ You cut him off.
“CALM DOWN?! How can you say that at a time like this? Anon’s gone off the deep end and released Discord! The only logical course of action is to find the elements and use them on Discord again. AND I CAN’T FIND THEM. Thus, the only logical conclusion is to PANIC!”
>To ram your point home you take a break from your zipping from one side of the library to another to give your purple headed lizard a good shake.
>...
>That came out wrong.
“WHARGARBL” You exclaim, as you pull down entire shelves of books.
>One of them has to be the right one!

>Be Spike.
>Your moth- um... supervisor? Let’s go with egg-hatcher has gone on one of her mild psychotic episodes again.
>And she has the nerve to call Anon crazy.
>It always happens when you belch up one of her scrolls from her mentor, Princess Celestia.
>But it seems that this one is extra bad.
>Seems that Discord came back and is ripping Canterlot a new asshole.
>Twilight’s dealt with him before, but she’s really getting stressed now.
>You’re pretty sure you read something about this being stress caused by some form of post-traumatic stress disorder, but you can’t spell those words, let alone articulate them properly in speech.
>Well, you’d better do something about all this, since everyp0ny seems to be off their crazy pills today.
>Walk over to the shelf that contains the book on the Elements of Harmony reference guide.
>That was where Discord hid them last time.
>The book made a pretty cool hiding place last time.
>You always wanted to hide things in books, but when Twilight saw you hollowing out the pages you couldn’t sit straight for a week after.
>...
>Wait, that came out wrong.
>Anyway, you open the book and are bathed in the multichromatic luminescence that the Elements give off.
>You always thought that shit was pretty cool at least.
>Sometimes when Twilight was asleep, you pretended you were the “best” Element of Harmony, Awesome, who wore all the elements and shouted “TASTE THE RAINBOW, MOTHERFUCKERS” at your enemies.
>Then Rainbow Dash found out and said that SHE was the element of awesome and that you couldn’t compete.
>That made you kinda sad for a while.
>Anyway. No more diversions.
“Twi, I’ve foun- GAH!”
>Twilight headbutts you out from in front of the book you were holding, displacing you so fast that the book doesn’t even drop, and instead lands in her own hooves.
>You find that the p0nies tend to do that a lot around here. It’s really quite rude.
>She doesn’t even spare a second to glance at where you landed.
>You pull your scales out of a support beam that they got wedged into.
>”YES! I finally found them! Let’s see... 1, 2... 6? OH NO! Why are there six?! Oh dear Celestia... What does this mean?”
>Ugh. This is why you don’t skip medication Twilight...
“Twilight, there’s always been 6 Elements of Harmony. You, Pinkie, Rainbow, Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy.”
>”There’s no such pony as Fluttershy! First Anon says it, then you!” She screams back.
>Her mane is taking on that frazzled, worried look now.
>She always gets it looking like that when she has one of these episodes.
>This might not end well.
“You really don’t remember her? Yellow? Pink mane? Shy, timid? She had a modelling career that made her an obscene amount of money and publicity.”
>”... Nope.”
>Dese fuckin’ p0nes, mang...
>”She tries to rape Anon practically daily, with less than stellar results. You always, ALWAYS invariably go and help Anon clean up after whatever crazy scheme she’s come up with to destroy his house and sanity.”
>Nothing. This information doesn’t register at all. She just sits there with a blank expression.
>She does however pipe up anyway with one of her half-baked ideas.
>”Ok, so if we have an extra Element of Harmony, we can get Rainbow Dash to take that element of... Kindness? And you can be the Element of Rainbow Dash! IT’S PERFECT.”
>She’s stroking her mane as she says all this.
>It does nothing to smooth out the kinks.
“Ok, Twilight... I’m going to get the girls now. We’ll sort all this out when they get here.
>”Great. Fine... It’ll all be fine...”
>She lies down in the corner of the library and curls up in the fetal position.
>You leave the building as she starts sucking her hoof like a filly.