Writing - Short Ideas

I would get mad if some tanuki just started black mailing my son just to get him a "secure financial future".
He needs to love his kobold friend that lives in the lower income area of the city.

But Mr. Dubs, he can just plow the both of them and nail a secure financial future for her too. Everyone wins.

A poor kobold is about as faithful as you can get. And then comes the jewnuki to take what was rightfully belonged to the loving kobold. It hurts her when she finds out you dicked a much older woman with more money than she even knows what to do with.

The next day.
>”Happy Birthday Anon!”
>’B-but today isn’t my birthday.’
>”Really? Oh well. As my gift to you, I got you what every young boy deserves to have.”
>Nook pushes a large box up to him
>”Open it up. Ufufufu~”
>’Thanks, I guess. I’m sorry, I’m just still thinking about...’
>”HI ANON!”
>the kobold leaps out of the box and tackles him to the ground, hugging him
>her coat is shinier and cleaner than it’s ever been
>she now has a collar with a gold tag saying “Anon” on the front and Nook Corp. on the back
>”Every boy deserves a dog.”

I thought that old tanuki would be more possesive/cruel with shotanon. That's nice of her to get that broke kobold out of there

She technically owns the kobold now, but it doesn’t matter since she gifted her to anon

Going to feed that nooki grapes like she was an emperor. That kobold is going to get head pats.

This was heartwarming. Poor doggo glowed up.

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>Come in for stab wound
>cutesy talking cat girl nurse admits you
>admits you to a bed with multiple cats on in
>there doesn’t seem to be any doctors anywhere
>the cats are all sleeping on you, except for one twin tailed one staring at your poorly bandaged wound
>”This is how I die”
>anon lays his head back and accepts his fate
>wakes up with a bespectacled nekomata doctor by his side
>”You’ve made a full recovery. Dismissal is by the receptionist. Here’s my card, call me if you don’t feel right or if you need me for anything. Feel better Anyon~ (*^ =ω= ^*)”
>Bastet Healthcare System

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I want a ditzy, borderline dummy wurm! I will cherish her drawings forever.
Dorome is best dummyfu
>pops out of the ground next to a dorome
>"This map is no help at all! Excuse me lady, do you know where my husband is?"
>"Who is he?"
>"He's amazing! So smart and funny, but a little weak. That's why I'm going to find him and protect him since I'm strong!"
>"I want a husband too, could you show me yours?"
>"Sure! Follow me!"
Later
>"Look anon! I made a friend! Can she stay with us for a while? How can you say no to this face?"
: D
>and that's how I started my harem
>Wurm only realizes years later that you married Dorome too
>More excited than anything

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A Seinfeld episode but with the gang reacting to a post-portal world
>Elaine, annoyed by her co-workers newfound huge breasts, accidentally gets mixed up in the Sabbath
>>"I'm getting real sick and tired of these cow girls around the office. We get it. You have teats!"
>>"Pshh. Tell me about it."
>>"Aren't you a little young to be saying that while downing a glass of wine?"
>>"Lady, I'm 300 years old. Ever heard of a Baphomet?"
>>"No. Actually. I'm sorry."
>>"Don't worry about it, happens all the time. Look. If you want some help with your problems at work, come by this address. Me and my friends run an organization. We'll help you out."

>George hires a Kiki maid to clean, but accidentally tortures the poor girl by cleaning before she arrives so as not to be embarrassed
>>"I can't have her going through my house unprepared Jerry! Do you have any idea what these things are like? Being a maid isn't just a hobby or a job, this is their life! And they'll be judging me for every little detail!"
>>"So what if she finds an apple core on your desk and dirty socks on the floor? Isn't that the point of having a maid? If you're so paranoid, why do you keep hiring her?"
>>"I didn't hire her! She just shows up. I can't even say no to her, she's got those big blue eyes, you know them?"
>>"I'm familiar yes."
>>"It's like trying to kick out a puppy."

>Jerry keeps getting hit on by all the girls he saw in his normal life that got monsterized
>>"Hey Kramer, do you ever get the feeling you're being watched by them?"
>>"Nope. Not anymore. I'm hitched. Cosmo is off the market!"
>>"Well good for you because this is getting unbearable for me. The dry cleaner is some spider woman, The librarian is a cow thing, and even the homeless lady is a slime. How are all of these people so discontent with humanity? I feel like a raw steak being watched by a pack of wolves."
>>"It's a Hakutaku"
>>"What?"
>>"The librarian, she's a Hakutaku. They're a bovine race that eat books to take in their knowledge"
>>"Why do you know that?"
>>"Why don't you?"

>Kramer is seen with a new species hanging on his arm every scene, it's revealed at the end of the episode he has a shapeshifter girlfriend, not a harem of 10+ girls
>>"You thought I had multiple girls? Don't be preposterous! There's no way I could split my love up between multiple girls."
>>"Not that there's anything wrong with that."