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zer0bandit

Zer0

zer0bandit
Apr 5th, 2009
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  1. Guest_unavailableforyou has joined the chat
  2.  
  3. Guest_unavailableforyou: hi
  4.  
  5. Zer0bandit: Hallo.
  6.  
  7. Guest_unavailableforyou: a.s.l?
  8.  
  9. Zer0bandit: er
  10.  
  11. Guest_unavailableforyou: age?
  12.  
  13. Guest_unavailableforyou: sex?
  14.  
  15. Guest_unavailableforyou: location?
  16.  
  17. Zer0bandit: young enough to know everything/female, last time I checked/Australia.
  18.  
  19. Guest_unavailableforyou: good
  20.  
  21. Guest_unavailableforyou: do u like sex?
  22.  
  23. Zer0bandit: Er... sure, it's lots of fun and all.
  24.  
  25. Guest_unavailableforyou: ok
  26.  
  27. Guest_unavailableforyou: can u make me cum?
  28.  
  29. Guest_unavailableforyou: huh?
  30.  
  31. Zer0bandit: My, you're awfully forward.
  32.  
  33. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes
  34.  
  35. Guest_unavailableforyou: do u have a yahoo or msn id?
  36.  
  37. Zer0bandit: So you're up for the cyber, then, I imagine?
  38.  
  39. Zer0bandit: Not that you'll be getting, my dear.
  40.  
  41. Zer0bandit: If you'd like to cyber, go ahead and throw an opening line out there.
  42.  
  43. Zer0bandit: But, as you can probably tell, I'd prefer something worth reading.
  44.  
  45. Guest_unavailableforyou: do u know cyber?
  46.  
  47. Guest_unavailableforyou: can u meke me cum?
  48.  
  49. Zer0bandit: Do you have any more lines than that, dear?
  50.  
  51. Zer0bandit: As far as cyber sex goes, if we have a session, I imagine there will be a climax somewhere in there. You don't seem to be very articulate in your questioning, though.
  52.  
  53. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes if u make me horny
  54.  
  55. Guest_unavailableforyou: ?
  56.  
  57. Zer0bandit: Well, if you want to cyber, throw an opening line out there.
  58.  
  59. Guest_unavailableforyou: can u make me horny?
  60.  
  61. Zer0bandit: You know, start the narrative?
  62.  
  63. Guest_unavailableforyou: u start
  64.  
  65. Zer0bandit: Ah ha, no thank you.
  66.  
  67. Zer0bandit: You're the one coming up to me and asking blatantly for cyber.
  68.  
  69. Zer0bandit: The least you can do is demonstrate what you've got before I agree to anything.
  70.  
  71. Guest_unavailableforyou: why not?
  72.  
  73. Zer0bandit: I'm not sure where you're getting your information, but I don't exist here to give cyber to random ring-ins from the internet.
  74.  
  75. Zer0bandit: If you want cyber, start.
  76.  
  77. Guest_unavailableforyou: i wanna licking all of your body
  78.  
  79. Guest_unavailableforyou: do u like it?
  80.  
  81. Zer0bandit: Oh, do you?
  82.  
  83. Zer0bandit: Go on.
  84.  
  85. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes
  86.  
  87. Guest_unavailableforyou: spesially your pussy
  88.  
  89. Zer0bandit: Oh, you like that, do you?
  90.  
  91. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes
  92.  
  93. Guest_unavailableforyou: u start
  94.  
  95. Guest_unavailableforyou: what u like?
  96.  
  97. Zer0bandit: Mmm, I like men who are flexible. Are you flexible?
  98.  
  99. Guest_unavailableforyou: whats your mean?
  100.  
  101. Zer0bandit: Are you flexible, is what I mean. Limber. Taut.
  102.  
  103. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes im
  104.  
  105. Zer0bandit: Ahh. So you're good at lots of different positions? Like the kama sutra?
  106.  
  107. Zer0bandit: Are you like that book?
  108.  
  109. Guest_unavailableforyou: i never see it
  110.  
  111. Zer0bandit: Oh, but you should.
  112.  
  113. Zer0bandit: It's got all kinds of magnificent positions in it.
  114.  
  115. Guest_unavailableforyou: really?
  116.  
  117. Guest_unavailableforyou: ok
  118.  
  119. Guest_unavailableforyou: u explain it for me
  120.  
  121. Zer0bandit: What, the kama sutra?
  122.  
  123. Zer0bandit: Or what I'd like you to be able to do?
  124.  
  125. Guest_unavailableforyou: i doing it if u tell me what i should do
  126.  
  127. Zer0bandit: Well, I like interesting positions. Do you like interesting positions?
  128.  
  129. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes
  130.  
  131. Guest_unavailableforyou: explain it
  132.  
  133. Zer0bandit: What's your favourite position?
  134.  
  135. Guest_unavailableforyou: dogy style
  136.  
  137. Zer0bandit: That's not very interesting.
  138.  
  139. Zer0bandit: Is that really your favourite? That's not hot at all.
  140.  
  141. Guest_unavailableforyou: what style u like?
  142.  
  143. Zer0bandit: Oh, all sorts. The chinese wheel is nice. Or the ninety-six, which is different to the sixty-nine.
  144.  
  145. Zer0bandit: Or something tantric. What do you think about tantric methods?
  146.  
  147. Guest_unavailableforyou: what is it?
  148.  
  149. Zer0bandit: Tantric methods?
  150.  
  151. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes
  152.  
  153. Zer0bandit: You really don't know what they are?
  154.  
  155. Zer0bandit: And you cyber?
  156.  
  157. Guest_unavailableforyou: yes i dont know it
  158.  
  159. Zer0bandit: You ought to do some research- you don't know much about sex at all.
  160.  
  161. Zer0bandit: And you don't know the chapters in the kama sutra about intimacy and the different alignments?
  162.  
  163. Zer0bandit: Nothing about chakras?
  164.  
  165. Guest_unavailableforyou: no
  166.  
  167. Zer0bandit: That is sad, sad indeed.
  168.  
  169. Zer0bandit: So- forgive me for being forward- how many women have you been with in real life?
  170.  
  171. Guest_unavailableforyou: ):
  172.  
  173. Zer0bandit: Hmm?
  174.  
  175. Guest_unavailableforyou: 2
  176.  
  177. Zer0bandit: I see. And you went in without knowing anything about sutras or chakras or tantric meditation.
  178.  
  179. Zer0bandit: And, what, the only positions you know are missionary and doggy style?
  180.  
  181. Zer0bandit: You don't know the rocking chair form, or the bull and deer, or the ocean of peace and enlightenment?
  182.  
  183. Guest_unavailableforyou: !!!!!!!
  184.  
  185. Zer0bandit: What about the yoni and lingham massages? They're fairly integral for any kind of intimacy.
  186.  
  187. Zer0bandit: I'll take your silence to mean no...
  188.  
  189. Zer0bandit: You poor thing.
  190.  
  191. Guest_unavailableforyou: i dont know
  192.  
  193. Zer0bandit: You should definitely get yourself a copy of the kama sutra.
  194.  
  195. Zer0bandit: Read up on tantric massages and techniques.
  196.  
  197. Zer0bandit: Look into chakras and alignment of energies.
  198.  
  199. Guest_unavailableforyou: u tell me about them
  200.  
  201. Zer0bandit: You really don't know anything about sex if your repertoire is two positions and nothing else.
  202.  
  203. Zer0bandit: No wonder you've only been with two women, my dear.
  204.  
  205. Zer0bandit: That is really very unfortunate.
  206.  
  207. Zer0bandit: Now, I'm no tantric master, so I cannot teach you these things.
  208.  
  209. Guest_unavailableforyou: ):
  210.  
  211. Zer0bandit: It's much more than just a few words on the internet.
  212.  
  213. Zer0bandit: But I doubt you'll do well with any women unil you know a little more.
  214.  
  215. Zer0bandit: It's not all wham bam thank you ma'am.
  216.  
  217. Zer0bandit: There is an art to lovemaking, and your life will be enriched if you learn the way.
  218.  
  219. Guest_unavailableforyou: can u make me cum if u know cyber then u can make me horny and cum
  220.  
  221. Zer0bandit: Listen, I don't know who you've been bumping internet uglies with
  222.  
  223. Zer0bandit: but if this is your general form, I can't imagine any of it would have been vary gratifying.
  224.  
  225. Zer0bandit: For either partner.
  226.  
  227. Zer0bandit: I believe you'd have a lot more success if you built up to it. Just like sex, if you can manage to last longer than twenty seconds.
  228.  
  229. Zer0bandit: A slow buildup to a tangible release, or in this instance, the cyber you want.
  230.  
  231. Zer0bandit: Believe me, you'll enjoy it much more that way.
  232.  
  233. Guest_unavailableforyou: please
  234.  
  235. Zer0bandit: Or, if you're still reluctant, you can bend over, let me tie you to the bedpost, and fuck you in the ass with a strap-on.
  236.  
  237. ...
  238.  
  239. Guest_unavailableforyou has left the chat
  240.  
  241. Zer0bandit: That's how I get my kicks, baby.
  242.  
  243.  
  244.  
  245.  
  246. Then, right after, in a private message from me to him:
  247.  
  248. Was it good for you, baby?
  249.  
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