Dear Kedaja,

I messed up.

I sincerely apologize for what I've done.
I pushed you out of my life when all you wanted to do was care. You were a figure that showed me love and consistency in a world full of inconsistencies. Yet, I coldly shut you out and fought tooth and nail to burn every single bridge in my life, sentencing myself to a world of isolation, a world of uncertainty, and a world of pain.



Id like to start off by saying that I don't like myself when I act in such an
unruly manner and can only imagine how my behavior made you feel. Looking in the mirror, I saw an image that reminded me of someone I'd never want to be, someone without the capacity for remorse nor empathy. I saw smallness. I saw denial. I saw my father.



It was horrible.


I should have never made you feel the way i made you feel nor as long as it potentially had went on. I should have apologized as soon as possible.

My shame delayed my promptness as I did not know how to approach you, and my heart told me that I had done too much damage to even deserve such forgiveness. My intentions for this message are to atone for my indiscretions and repair what I have broken. My immaturity and lack of reason caused me to lose a good friend and sever a growing bond, and I sincerely apologize and am working hard to become a better person.

-Sincerely, yours truly,
Andrew