Maria

Moonlight cascaded into the windows of the Jackson County settlement homes, cicadas singing a song of the night within the darkness. I settled into the comfort of a dimly lit living room to tend to a wounded leg of one of the local children in the community. My hands caressed the cotton ball in-between slender digits as I cleaned the blood on the young girl's leg. Sher soft whimpering and gentle sniffles, oh...how it pained me to hear. I could recall the time when I was just a little girl, getting into trouble as I tried to have fun. However, times were different now. Due to the outbreak, infection was at an all time high and everyone needed to be careful - more sanitary as well. After all, spores could seep into your being; eating away at the tissue of any species until there's nothing left but the exoskeleton. It was my duty to make sure that none of this happened to the people of my community. I am supposed to protect them at all costs, but lately my world has been in shambles.<br><br>

My husband ran off on a dangerous fool's errand. A quest for retaliation to avenge the murder of his brother, Joel. I'd be lying to myself if I said I wouldn't have done that for my own blood - but to leave your wife without a proper goodbye? To leave me with a single letter to wake up to, knowing that there was a possibility that I'd never see that man again? It was selfish. My heart ached, but everyone on the settlement looked up to me for strength and leadership, so I couldn't fall short. I had to be tough and put on the resilient exterior that I always exhibited.Snapping out of my dispiriting thoughts, I turned my attention back to the sobbing child as she wiped her eyes. Merciful fingertips brushed against brown pigment as I wrapped the compression bandage around the  injury.<br><br>

"Maria?" The little girl glanced up at me. Crystalline dew drops pooling within sad eyes.<br><br>

"Yes, sweet pea?" I smiled softly.<br><br>

"Seth said that you're going to have to cut my leg off if it doesn't heal. I don't want to lose my leg!" She cried out.<br><br>

I shook my head slowly, disappointed that Seth would tell a young girl such a horrid tale - but of course, he was known to preach callous words. He wasn't a very friendly man and held beliefs that I wouldn't agree with, but I couldn't deny anyone of protection. He needed a home and I opened my doors just as I did for many others. "Honey, you're not going to lose your leg. Don't listen to Seth, he's clueless about everything. This was just a cut, but you're gonna' have to be careful from now on. Stay away from the scrap yard, you hear me?"<br><br>

"Yes, Maria." The girl smiles softly. Her tears began to dry upon her cheeks, seemingly more happy now that she knew for sure that her leg wouldn't be amputated. Standing up from the wooden chair, she wrapped her small arms around my waist and hugged me as tight as she could. I gave her head a soft Pat, chuckling softly to myself. "You go on and get home now. It's getting late and I'm sure your parents are worried about you." I spoke, soft undertones of concern dancing amongst my words. I took her by the hand, walking her towards the door before opening it slowly. Stepping out on to the porch, I watched as she limped away in an exaggerated manner. It was amusing to me how kids could overemphasize the smallest wounds.<br><br>

Lowering my head, I closed my eyes and inhaled slowly. Salted winds caressed my cheeks, leaving behind a bitter taste in my mouth. For a moment, things felt relaxing. That was until I heard a familiar voice speak to me. "Darlin..." He called out to me. My eyes fluttered open only to catch a glimpse of the parted lips that spoke the word.<br><br>

Standing with his feet planted firmly against the grass was my husband, Tommy Miller. Scratches upon his face and one eye bandaged with tattered gauze, I couldn't believe my eyes. <br><br>

"What the hell happened to you, Tommy?"<br><br>

"Long story." He whispered as he walked up the stairs of the porch. "But I suppose I could start by saying that one of my eyes are gone." He snickered, pointing to the bandaged area.<br><br>

I didn't laugh. I stood there in silence,  hands balled into fist as I fought back the tears that dared to fight their way out from my eyes. I desperately wanted to punch him in the face and give him the welcome back that he deserved for leaving me here alone to wonder what day I'd become a widow. I wanted to hurt him just as much as I was hurting, make him feel less important to me as I felt for him - but I couldn't find the words to express myself. Turning on the heels of my boots, I walked across the threshold of the front door, only stopping to glance at him for a second. "Well then, get inside. I'll patch you up before that thing gets infected." I muttered.<br><br>

The heavy strides that followed behind me let me know that he accompanied me in the house. His footsteps were as loud as a harvest thunderstorm, but weaker in a sense. With the use of my left hand, I motioned for him to take a seat in the living room area. His eyes were fixated on me, and I'll admit that I had a tough time now glancing at him every now and then. Grabbing a wash rag and some medical supplies, I proceeded to meet him in the living room and set the items on the coffee table. I kept the wash cloth in hand in order to not contaminate it with dust or any germs lingering around on the table top. Slowly but surely, I began to undress his laceration to survey the damage.<br><br>

Ocean hues looked down upon his face, his eyes staring back into my own before I looked away. I quickly lowered my hand, grasping the bottle of hydrogen peroxide to pour onto the wash cloth. Bringing it up to his face, I began to clean the area - hoping to avoid the risk of hurting him too much. Next, I flushed the wound with a mild saline solution just to be sure that no bacteria was left behind. I knew that Infections were caused not only by exposure to bacteria and pathogens, but from my surfaces that came in contact with the wound. I had to be careful, but I had so many thoughts racing through my mind.<br><br>

"I've...I've missed you, Maria."<br><br>

"Don't..." I hissed.<br><br>

"I know that you don't want to hear it, but it's true. There wasn't a second that passed where I didn't think about getting back home to you."<br><br>

I scoffed as I covered his eye with fresh gauze. The scent of the post solution filled the area, wafting through my nostrils. I tried to ignore his words, but he continued to push my limits; provoking me to react.<br><br>

"I got you something, darlin'. I saw this and it made me think of you."  Tommy offered up a slight smile, reaching into the left pocket of his jean jacket to remove a gold necklace. He held out his hand, offering the gift to me, but I refused.<br><br>

"You think that you can just come back here and a damn necklace is going to make this better, Tommy? You left me without even a second thought."<br><br>

"I had to do this, Maria. He's my brother."<br><br>

"And I'm your wife!" I shouted at him. My hands trembled in outrage. Of course, I loved Joel just as much as Tommy did. He was my brother-in-law and I grew to accept him the very second he came back into Tommy's life. I cared about his well being as much as I cared about my husband's, but we'd lost him and I didn't want to lose my husband too.<br><br>

"Listen, I get that you're hurting. I know that Joel was your older brother and watching him die wasn't the easiest thing to do. He did things to protect Ellie and he had to love with that, but when does this end? It's going to be a never ending cycle. He killed that brute's father and in return, she killed him. I hate it, God...you know I do, Tommy; but who's next? She kills Ellie and then we are all out for blood? Then she kills you and I'm a widow who has to go out to avenge you? At what point do you think about us for once. At what point do you think about the repercussions? I know that I can be stubborn, but I needed time. If you would have given that to me, I could have come up with a plan to help you with this."<br><br>

Tommy fell silent, his fingers curling around the necklace as he clutched on to it for dear life. I watched as he stood to his feet, taking a few steps closer to me. His arms spread open to embrace me, but I stopped him dead in his tracks.<br><br>

"You don't get to do that. You don't get to hold me like you give a damn about my feelings. You did what you did at the expense of my emotions and I can't forgive that."<br><br>

"Maria...I love you. You know that I do."<br><br>

"I think that we need some time apart, Tommy. I think that you should go now."<br><br>

"You don't mean that. You can't mean that..." Tommy shook his head.His eyes pleading with me to change my mind, to think about what Iwas saying.<br><br>

"You can swing by and get your things in the morning, but for now, I can't even bring myself to look at you. You can stay in one of the cabins for a while." My words spat out like venom.<br><br>

I felt a ping of pain in my gut, and for a second it felt as if my heart had stopped. It was true, I couldn't bring myself to look at him for the fear of giving in. I couldn't let him think that pushing my feelings aside was okay, not even by a longshot. Tommy didn't say a word in response to my final decision. Instead, he leaned in to plant a soft kiss to my forehead - his hand dropping the necklace onto the coffee table as he pushed himself to make his exit from what used to be our home.