Laith       says (9:22 PM):
*yeah I understand..trust me like in november/december
*I was FUCKED up
*because of all of the Ale and Danial shit. but now honestly I think I came out stronger
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (9:23 PM):
*yea i completely understand your situation
*like
*before we finally calmed down between me and jen last night
*i felt like dying in the last three days
*i havent been on msn
*at all
*nor talk
*to anyone
*i just locked my self in my room
     Laith       says (9:23 PM):
*exactly lol..like, no appatite, dont feel like doing shit
*and the thing is, it just makes it worse when its someone you love so much
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:25 PM):
*:S
*i'm so glad we just had that suuper long talk
*we got to talk about so much
     Laith       says (10:26 PM):
*that's good to hear o: how'd it go
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:26 PM):
*well before anything
*i wanted to get her to a calming feeling
*that
*like
*i wont want anything else i say to stir up
*and cause another argument
*but like
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:27 PM):
*i told her
*how i've missed everything
*and how we're so close
*how we've been through so much together
*and i kinda started crying, then she was
*saying that it's her fault for everything
*and i kept saying that if it wasnt for my selfish jealousy
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:28 PM):
*that we wouldn't have to go through all of this..
*:/
*so then we talked
*about like
*us
*as brothers
*and how close we are together
*and how it has to now feel like a dense relationship
*split into two among us
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:29 PM):
*and she keeps saying that's she's scared
*of how sk8 and you think of her
*and i told her about how
*me and her may not always agree with sk8
*and his ways, when he tries to help
*but in the end, he DOES try
*and it's what counts
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:30 PM):
*so then i kinda talked about you
*how i told you a little bit tonight
*and being totally honest
*we both agreed that from the very beginning
*i should have came to advice from the both of you
*because you've been through a similar path
*and i told jen that you're a great person
*and she just goes
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:31 PM):
*"yea i know, ray is ray, nothing else needs to be said"
*"he's always here for us, and i love him for that"
*and she got kinda worried of what you might think of her for this situation
*how her dating kai caused so much
*changes
*and knnow you dont think of her in that way
*at all
*so i told her all of that
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:32 PM):
*i told her that, i chose bryce and you
*out of all people i can come to
*why?
*because you two are the most understanding people i've ever met
*and you two can't be replaced
*so yea :S
     Laith       says (10:32 PM):
*:'( haha. sounds like a really good talk. yeah I mean nothing of how I see her has changed
     Laith       says (10:33 PM):
*like, if her and kai are good together thats great, honestly i dont care THAT much about age (obviously >.>)
*but yeah, basically bryce and I might not always have the best advice but we always give it our best shot..
     Laith       says (10:34 PM):
*but yeah, we're here for you :S like you were here when I was going through that rough time
     Laith       says (10:35 PM):
*and it's not going to get better soon, trust me. it took me sooo much thought about what was best for me, Ale, Danial, her family and my family
     Laith       says (10:36 PM):
*months dude, months >_<.  of just mental torture. so if you ever just need to talk and let shit out
*and it DOES help; bryce and I are here
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:36 PM):
*yea i know :/
*i'm the most emotionally weak person i have ever seen
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:37 PM):
*i can't handle a most simple situation
*it's amazing at how quickly i can get jealous
*but like, i don't express it out to you guys
*but jen have gone through seriously so much
*it's hard to explain how close we are
*i've grown into so many attachments with her, and habits
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:38 PM):
*habits like, how often she would call me
*is the main thing
*so like
*eh
*i really don't want to feel this way
*but now it's like
*whenever she isn't talking to me on the phone
*i have the thought in my mind that i'm being "replaced"
*i know that's seriously not the word to use
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:39 PM):
*but meh :/ , it's just sad to see it happen sometimes
*because i'm so used to what we've gone through for so long
     Laith       says (10:39 PM):
*yeah, I understand that. it's really not a "simple situation" like you said at all :S i mean
     Laith       says (10:40 PM):
*and maybe this is your chance to grow emotionally, it'll be hard as fuck, but when it's over, you'll be stronger emotionally and maybe even close to her. you'll understand yourself better too
**closer to her
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:41 PM):
*did you know that this situation almost hit it's last case scenario?...
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:42 PM):
*jen almost killed herself with a suicide note to me...
*blaming this on herself
*so i demanded her to call me
*and she kept saying that she can't live anymore
*and i cried so fucking hard over the phone..
(sn)    p h i l l i p says (10:43 PM):
*till now, my god family is still struck clueless as to wtf happened..
*it was during the time when i JUST moved in, and i lived at their houseb ecause i had no internet
     Laith       says (10:45 PM):
*hmm...close call I guess. maybe its a chance for both of you to grow. she obviously cares about you too, to go to that extent
*really not a simple situation at all >_<