Dean: Symmetry Sucks

<Soro> You open the door, into a room that's way more organized than it should be.
<Soro> Everything is perfectly in place, and on top of that, everything is symmetrical.
<Soro> Even objects that there are only one of are cleaved in half and put on matching sides of the room.
<Soro> It's a bit eerie.
<Dean_Sinclair> "...What"
<Soro> Even a symmetrical door has been put in the other side of the room.
* Dean_Sinclair walks up to his mother's desk to look around inside
<Soro> Inside the desk or the room?
<Dean_Sinclair> the desk
<Soro> Two pencils, two paperclips, a bunch of important papers that you can't read since they're exactly the same on both halves of the paper
<Dean_Sinclair> Experimentally, Dean moves one of the pencils to me no longer symmetrical
<Soro> You tweak one of the pencils.
<Soro> Immediately, two shadowy figures step out of the wall in tandem and fix it.
* Dean_Sinclair tries to poke them
<Soro> They don't seem to give a fuck about you, other than to fix your hair to be perfectly symmetrical.
* Dean_Sinclair immediately messes his hair up again
<Soro> They fix it again, a bit more annoyed this time.
* Dean_Sinclair does it again
<Dean_Sinclair> Screw these guys
<Soro> The one on the left slaps you.
<Soro> Then the one on the right freaks out and does the same to your other cheek.
<Dean_Sinclair> "Nice try"
* Dean_Sinclair picks up one of the pencils
<Soro> You can't hear their shadowtalk but they're probably arguing about the shape of the bruise on your cheek.
<Soro> GASP.
<Soro> THIS.
<Soro> MEANS.
<Soro> WAR.
<Soro> Roll Initiative.
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d20+1
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=20 ] | {21}
<Soro> !roll 2#1d20+2
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 2#1d20+2 -->  | [ 1d20=13 ]{15}, [ 1d20=18 ]{20}
<Soro> The one on the right voluntarily slows down to match the pace of left dude.
<Soro> You go first.
* Dean_Sinclair equips his hammer and shield
<Dean_Sinclair> He bonks the left one with his hammer
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d20+3
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=20 ] | {23}
<Soro> Holy shit crit central up on here
<Soro> Roll another regular d20.
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d8+3
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d8+3 --> [ 1d8=2 ] | {5}
<Dean_Sinclair> so 10
<Soro> "Roll another regular d20. "
<Soro> Pls do
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d20
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20 --> [ 1d20=6 ] | {6}
<Soro> Alright.
<Soro> You smash left dude's face with your hammer, a crater-sized indent appearing on right dude. Right screams out in pain.
<Soro> Minor or move?
<Dean_Sinclair> He then pushes right away from him with his shield
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d20+3
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=3 ] | {6}
<Soro> RIP.
<Soro> You push kind of weakly, and right just stares at you impassively.
<Soro> Move?
<Dean_Sinclair> End Turn
<Soro> They both snarl out in synchronicity, before taking a miniature model of a cannon and taking two lighters to it.
<Soro> A second later, a cannonball bursts through the right wall of your mother's office, plowing through everything and targetting you with a
<Soro> !roll 1d20+3
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=5 ] | {8}
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d4
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d4 --> [ 1d4=4 ] | {4}
<Soro> which misses.
<Soro> !roll 1d20+3
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=20 ] | {23}
<Soro> But the other one from behind you hits!
<Soro> Holy shit it is crit central up in here.
<Soro> !roll 1d4+1
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d4+1 --> [ 1d4=1 ] | {2}
<Soro> Pfft.
<Soro> 4 damage.
<Soro> End turn.
<Dean_Sinclair> Dean smashes the left one again
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d20+3
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=12 ] | {15}
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d8+2
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d8+2 --> [ 1d8=1 ] | {3}
<Soro> You smash him again, right taking the blunt of the blow and staggering.
<Soro> He goes down
<Dean_Sinclair> He hoists his shield again, preparing to block the other's attack
<Soro> End turn??
<Dean_Sinclair> End Turn
<Soro> Left picks up a little toy knight and starts messing with it, sending a real life one towards you.
<Soro> !roll 1d20+1
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+1 --> [ 1d20=5 ] | {6}
<Soro> It slices at you, but misses, carving into the wall.
<Soro> End turn.
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d20+3
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=16 ] | {19}
<Dean_Sinclair> BONK
<Dean_Sinclair> !roll 1d8+2
<Kaiserbot[Dice]> rolled 1d8+2 --> [ 1d8=6 ] | {8}
<Soro> Left is sufficiently bonked.
<Soro> He falls down as well, landing in perfect symmetrical pattern with his comrade.
<Soro> The office is now a mess.
<Soro> Take 30 EXP
<Dean_Sinclair> Taken
<Soro> Nothing else suspicious happens except for the frenzied yelling outside.
<Dean_Sinclair> Is that other door still there?
<Dean_Sinclair> Dean attempts to check that out
<Soro> It opens up into...
<Soro> A brick wall!
<Soro> Apparently these guys were very dedicated, but not *that* dedicated.
<Dean_Sinclair> Dean puts his weapons away, then looks at the things he just smashed with a hammer
<Soro> They're already dissolving into shadow.
<Soro> You can take a number of random baubles and shit from their corpses but why bother touching *that*
<Dean_Sinclair> Because why not?
* Dean_Sinclair touches the shadow
<Soro> It's cold.
<Soro> Other than that, it doesn't really affect you.
<Dean_Sinclair> Just to try, he captchalogues it
<Soro> ...
<Soro> Okay.
<Soro> Gain Solid Shadow x1
<Soro> The card turns a slightly darker shade of gray.
<Soro> That's probably not a good thing.
<Dean_Sinclair> With that over with, Dean gets looking on the source of those creatures
<Dean_Sinclair> What were they? Why were they in your mom's office?
<Soro> They came from the wall.
<Dean_Sinclair> Is there any reason for them to be here?