Listen to Smarty 7

>You are Listen, a pegasus fluffy
>You've got orange fluff and a gray mane and tail
>You live with your herd in a small alley in a place called "The Ci-tee"
>You don't like the alley, the ground is too hard and too few places to hide from kitty and doggy-munstas
>You'd rather live in the park, but your herd's Smarty Friend says there are too many dummy fluffies living there
>Another problem with the alley is that there are no nummies there, so every bright time your herd has to split up and bring back food to Smarty and the fluffy mummas
>You've been scouring the city all day for food with your two friends, Shiny and Pipes
>Shiny is a yellow unicorn stallion with a purple mane: he's super fun to play tag with and uses his horn to make the dark go away when you're scared
>Pipes is probably the prettiest earth fluffy you've ever seen: she's got a thick red coat of fluff with a beautiful purple mane, much longer and nicer then Shiny's
>You once wanted to be Pipes' special friend, but a big earth stallion named Macintosh gave her special huggies first; you're still glad you get to play with her though
>The three of you are currently very sad: you've search all day but found no nummies, and you've all gotten very dirty
>The latter distresses you more then the former: failure to find food gets you called a bad fluffy; failure to keep clean gets you a bath
>You hate baths: your Smarty friend takes you to place to a scary place called a "Foun-ton" and then forces you to get into the water
>The water comes up to the average fluffy's nose, so you have to keep your mouth up in order not to drown and the only way out of the fountain is with the help of another fluffy, usually the Smarty, who has to help pull you out
>Many fluffies get big sleepies because of baths
>Smarty says that Hoomans want good, clean fluffies to give homes to; that only bad fluffies drown because of baths
>You're not so sure
>Your Momma drowned when rain caused the fountain water to get too deep and Smarty ran away to try and stay dry
>You know Momma was a good fluffy and sometimes you feel Smarty is a bad one
>Pipes is the first to state her displeasure
"Nu wan' gu home. Nu wan' be bad fwuffy, nu wan' baff."
>You nod in agreement
"Nu wan' baff tuu, buh wan see sissy. Gwowy sky baww almos' home, fwuffies nee' gu home tuu.
>Shiny gets a big smile on his face
"Fwuffies gu home, buh watch gwowy box fiwst?"
>You and Pipes start wagging your tails as you agree to Shiny's smarty idea
>The three of you giggle madly as you race through the roads and backstreets of the city towards your destination
>The Glowy Box House is owned by a scary but nice Hooman with very little fluff on his head: he lets fluffies watch the glowy boxes as long as they don't make poopies outside his house and he chases away Hooman-munstas who try to hurt fluffies since they're "bad fow busy-ness"
>You once asked if he'd be you and your sister's daddy; he responded by slapping you on the poopie-place and told you not "tu ge' cawwied away"
>You're not sure what would carry you away, but the pain made sure you never asked again
>The three of you sit down and look up at the glowy boxes: it's currently showing hoomans talking to each other and showing pictures of other hoomans
>Shiny and Pipes like to wave at the hoomans and try to hug them through the glass
>You prefer to listen to what the hoomans talk about: Smarty says that good fluffies listen to what hoomans say and you want to be a good fluffy and get a hooman momma or dadda
>The hooman with fluff under his nose is currently talking directly to you, so you sit up and pay close attention
"-and tonight in local news, more businesses has been rocked by economic woes, including one you might not expect: a fluffy pony adoption center. Our own Jane Doe has more. Jane."
>You get excited at the mention of fluffies; maybe the box hoomans will tell you where you can find a Hooman of your own?
>A different hooman's voice starts talking about things you don't understand while the box shows pictures of a building you don't recognize
>You get a bit bored; you don't care about "the ekah-no-mee" or "buh-jet cuts", you want to see more hoomans!
>As if reading your fluffy mind the box now shows a pretty-looking hooman: she's very round, like a fluffy mumma, but she sounds very sad
"We've always been just barely making ends meet, but with the state cutting funding to animal shelters there's no way we can keep going."
>The picture changes to a room full of fluffy ponies, more then you've ever seen in your life
>They're all crammed into boxes, they all look clean, but many are crying and sticking their legs through the bars as if begging for hugs
"There's just too many fluffies and not enough people adopting them."
>Wait, what?
>You feel like someone just bucked you in the stomach: if there's not enough hoomans to give homes to those fluffies, who's going to give homes to you and your sister?
>The box shows the fluff-under-nose hooman again
>He turns to his friend, a pretty-looking hooman with long yellow fluff
"People just don't seem to want fluffy ponies anymore, do they?"
"No, they really don't"
>As the hoomans start talking about something else, your mind stops dead
>Hoomans don't want fluffies?
>You follow Shiny and Pipes as they decide they've hugged the glowy box hoomans enough and start heading back to the herd
>You barely notice the world around you; your mind is flooded with memories of your Momma, who died hoping you'd be adopted by nice hoomans; of your friends who were killed by hooman-munstas, thinking it was because they were bad fluffies
>You think of your sister, still believing that one day that you'd all be safe and loved
>And now you never will be
>You find yourself back in the alley, Pipes and Shiny cowering as the Smarty yells at you all
"-bad fwuffies! Nu bwing bak nummies and ge' aww diwty!"
>You stare at the ground
"…Smawty wie."
>The whole herd goes silent
>Your Smarty Friend looks furious
"What dummy fwuffy say?!"
>You look him straight in the eye
"Hoomans nu wan' fwuffies. Smawty wie."
>The herd begins to murmur, your Smarty Friend's horn starts to glow
"NU! Bad fwuffy wie! Smawty gif yuu biggest owwies!!!"
>Your Smarty Friend charges you, his horn lowered in order to gore you with it
>And you now know the glowy box spoke the truth
>And something snaps inside you
>You rear back and slam your head down onto the Smarty's
"SMAWTY WIE!"
>The impact plows the Smarty Friend's head into the concrete and you press on your attack, feelings of dizziness and pain pushed aside by sheer, unbridled rage
>You begin stomping the Smarty's face and legs and tearing out chunks of fluff with your teeth, all the while chanting your manic battle-cry
"SMAWTY WIE SMAWTY WIE SMAWTY WIE SMAWTY WI-"
>You're about to crush the Smarty's throat when a fluffy runs up and restrains you with a hug
>You shove your subduer away and are about to stomp them as well when your rage-addled mind recognizes the mustard-yellow fluff and white mane of the scared looking pegasus in front of you
>Look, your sister who you have loved and protected all your life, now cowers before you, begging meekly
"Bwudda guud fwuffy, nu meanie. Pwease nu be Scawy Fwiend nu mo'."
>You feel the anger rush out of your body and you hug your sister, whimpering apologies
>And then you wake up
---
>You are Listen, a Smarty Friend
>You panic a little as you look around the cave, not recognizing your surroundings
>Where are your friends?
>Your mind mind slowly starts up and you realize you were just dreaming
>Look and Shiny are long gone
>Pipes took a big sleep during your exodus from the city: she just wouldn't eat after her special friend was torn apart by doggy-munstas
>The rest of the cave is silent, save for the gentle snoring of your herd
>You wriggle free of the pile; Heartstrings begins cuddling Greenie, while Rover finally lets go of you and embraces his special friend, Blackie
>The glowy ball has barely begun its journey, the sky still a mixture of orange and red
>After checking the outside for munstas, you leave the cave and begin running around the field, reacquainting yourself the terrain
>You flap your wings a little while you run, letting you make believe that you can fly
>Since you can't play tag with the other fluffies during the day, doing so might distract you from listening for munstas, you like to run around just after waking in order to keep your legs strong
>A fluffy with weak legs is a fluffy that takes big sleeps
>You run around the field until you start to hear voices coming from the cave, signaling the herd has woken up
>You stand in front of the cave as Cinder emerges from it; the rest of the herd following behind him, looking nervous
>Cinder puffs his cheeks and stomps on the ground
"Smawty meanie! Cindew nu wissen tu meanie Smawty!"
>You puff your cheeks, spread your wings and stomp in return
"Cindew dummy fwuffy! Smawty gif dummy fwuffy big owwies!"
>The battle is on
>You turn and run from Cinder, who predictably charges after you, thinking you too cowardly to fight him
>In a normal fight, you'd just keep him chasing you until he tires out; your lighter body allows you to run much longer and faster then his heavy earth fluffy frame
>However, you have much to do this bright time, and wasting so much of it with on a fluffy like Cinder is just not an option
>You lead Cinder on a chase around the field before running up one side of your rock and down the other
>Cinder follows you blindly scrabbling up the rock, but as he descends he finds you waiting, your legs primed to strike
>You buck the charging fluffy hard in the face, momentum adding force to the blow and sending him tumbling backwards, his head smacking roughly against the stone
>You begin raining blows on Cinder's head, hoping your buck has done the trick, when one of his legs swings up and bashes you in the side of the head
>The blow sends you reeling, which is all Cinder needs to begin his assault: he spits in your eyes, blinding you, and then roughly stomping on your stomach and front legs
>Though your vision is obscured, you kick out with your back legs, striking Cinder square in the no-nos
>As Cinder falls over, you quickly pull yourself up and begin running again, putting distance between the two of you as you regain your ability to see
>Cinder does not pursue you this time, apparently learning from his earlier mistake
>You run a few circles around him, trying to goad him into a chase, but to no avail; you will have to bring the fight to Cinder
>You widen your circle a little and the charge straight at Cinder, running as fast as you possibly can at the earth fluffy
>Cinder rears back on his hind legs, intending to stomp you flat as you approach
>At the last moment, you kick off with all your legs and leap towards Cinder, slamming into his exposed belly and knocking him on to his back
>You roll a bit away from your opponent and quickly get to your feet, ready for another charge
>Cinder, on the other hand, lies flat on his back, his fluffy brain temporarily unable to handle that his legs are above the rest of his body
>You seize the opportunity and run up to your disabled foe, placing a hoof on his throat and pressing down
>A look of terror fills Cinder's face as he begins desperately gasping for breath, his legs thrashing wildly in the air
>You stare into Cinder's eyes: all it would take is a little more weight to crush his throat, to make him sleep forever
>You remember the terrified look on the Dummy Smarty's face when you overthrew him, of fluffies you fought in the city for nummies and shelter
>You remember your sister begging you not to be scary
>You remove your hoof from Cinder's throat and roll him on to his side
>Cinder looks at you confused as he gets to his feet, then roughly knocks you over
>For a moment, you are terrified, only to feel Cinder's tongue gently licking the bruise on your face from when he kicked you
"Smawty stiww meanie."
>You smile
"An' Cindew stiww dummy."
>The two of you giggle and hug, eliciting a cheer from the herd, having mostly forgotten the source of the conflict and just glad everyone is friends again
---
>You are Listen, still Smarty Friend of your herd
>After a group hug and grooming by some of the fussier mares, you stand atop your rock, your herd gathered underneath
"Hewd wissen tu Smawty! Smawty heaw Hooman-munstas in fowest!"
>The herd begins to panic at this news, looking around to try to find the hoomans or places to hide
>You stomp your hooves to regain the herd's attention
"Hewd wissen! Hewd send fwuffies in tu fowest, wook fo' hoomans! If nu can fin' hoomans, den hewd stay in cabe. If dis hooman wand…"
>You look at your anxious herd and take a deep breath
"…If dis hooman wand, den hewd mus' weave."
>The herd begins to whine at this news but quickly wither under your glare
>You give the fluffies their orders: Freddy, Ice, and Rover are to search for food for the journey, Freddy to find the nummies, Rover to test them, and Ice to make sure their both safe; you instruct them to look far away from the nummie bush from the previous bright time
>After thinking long and hard on it you've picked Raindrop, Steven and Sparks to look for the hoomans; You tell them to begin to start their search around the nummie bush from last bright time, making it extra clear they are not to interact with or provoke the hoomans in anyway; you simply want to know what the hoomans are doing
>The rest of the herd is to prepare for the journey, gathering whatever nummies remain in the field
>As you send the two parties of fluffies off, you try and reassure yourself
>You are sure Freddy will find food, though you worry Rover will not return; Ice, for all the noise she makes, is brave and will keep Freddy safe for sure
>You hope the other group will be as reliable; Raindrop can be somewhat of a whiner and a wuss, but he proved trustworthy when you told him about the hoomans
>Steven, a magenta earth fluffy with an orange mane and tail, is more of a gamble: apparently he used to live with a very meanie Hooman Dadda, as did his special friend, Roxanne; You've had to break up fights between him and fluffies who claim they had nice hoomans
>You trust Steven not to let hoomans find their way back to the cave, you just worry he might anger them instead of just observing
>Sparks, a brown unicorn with a blue mane with a yellow streak in it, is probably your best hope: he is Purple's special friend, and thus has the most motivation to make sure the forest is safe and make sure no munstas get near the cave
>You feel a bit of regret sending Sparks off, when you announced that he was going to look for the hoomans, he and Purple looked ready to burst into tears
>As you watch the six fluffies disappear into the forest, you feel very helpless
---
>You are a man named Jeff
>You'd been looking forward to this weekend camping trip for a month; a nice trip to get away from your annoying coworkers and satanic boss, a time of isolation and tranquility where you could do some fishing and roast some marshmallows
>Then your sister caught wind of your trip and thought it would be the perfect time for you to bond with her boyfriend, Lance; you grudgingly agreed when she promised to set you up with a hot friend who is also a hiking enthusiast
>After spending 24 hours with Lance, if that friend doesn't have a fantastic ass and a thing for men with Grizzly Adams beards, you've been ripped off
>He's loud, annoying, snores, and loves to talk about all the various exercises he does
>You were very nervous when you found out he'd brought a hunting rifle, very annoyed when he shot a deer in the face for no reason, and after he insisted on gutting it and hanging by a rope from a tree, you vowed to never leave your pocket knife out of arm's reach
>As you sit down for some pancakes, Lance still is going on about his kill
"I'm just saying, how can you deny that that was an amazing shot?"
>You continue to stare at the skillet on top of your cooking stove, trying not to imagine bashing Lance's head in with it
"I'm not denying anything, Lance. I am saying that I never agreed to any bet."
"Dude, that's not the-"
"I'm also saying that it's not deer hunting season."
"Dude, don't worry. If anybody asks, we just tell them we hit the deer with our car and put it out of its misery. I've done it before."
>That in no way surprises you
>As you tune out Lance and his hunting stories, you think you hear voices coming from a nearby bush
>You bend over and peer under the bush's leaves
>Your suspicions are confirmed: three fluffy ponies are currently huddled underneath, staring at you and Lance, or more likely, your food
>When they realize you can see them, two of the fluffies run off into the forest; the third, a little blue unicorn, waves a little at you a little and then follows its friends
"Crap. We're gonna have to move our campsite."
"Why, dude?"
"I just saw some fluffies and I don't know about you, but the last thing I want to deal with is herd of toddlers begging for my food."
>Lance gets an excited look on his face
"DUDE, THAT'S AWESOME! You really think there's a herd nearby?!"
"Probably. How is that awesome?"
"I know this guy, right? He always looking for fluffies, pays good money to guys who find 'em for him. We could make some serious money here, bro!"
>'Cause hunting down a bunch of screaming, shitting animals is SO what you wanted to do on your vacation
"Gee, I dunno Lance…"
>Lance is already digging out his cellphone
"Dude, don't worry. We'll split the money, even 50-50. No prob."
>You sigh; looks like this trip is officially ruined
>Your sister's friend better have an identical twin with a medical need to have three-ways
"Dude, it's me, Lance. You still lookin' for breeding stock?..."