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KXXIII

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KXXIII
Jan 3rd, 2019
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  1. .Jasper.
  2. 12/20/2018
  3. Niichan, can I be honest?
  4.  
  5. Aerach
  6. 12/20/2018
  7. Of course.
  8.  
  9. .Jasper.
  10. 12/20/2018
  11. Sometimes I think that you're so lost on who you are, that you end up getting lost on what you're interested in. You're wanting someone so badly that you tend to cling to the first people that show genuine interest (Not the fuccbois that are just being fuccbois). Obviously I understand, and I'm not shaming you for it or anything. But.. I think you need to take time to figure out what you really really want in a person before you continue looking?
  12.  
  13. Aerach
  14. 12/20/2018
  15. You know what I really really want?
  16. I know what I want. I want someone like Holland or someone like Rhys, who shares most of my interests and kinks. I want someone who will accept me for all that I am. The people I know I want always end up not wanting me. Or they can't be with me for some reason, even if they want to. I want someone that I actually love to love me back and want to be with me for once.
  17. Instead of being manipulated and guilt-tripped and pushed into shit I don't want to do.
  18. But I end up doing anyway because I'm a weak piece of shit.
  19. I want to be able to have standards for myself without being made to feel bad about someone liking me and me not liking them back.
  20.  
  21. .Jasper.
  22. 12/20/2018
  23. Well. Even if you're big and manly right now, you need to be honest with me about those things, okay? I'm going to do my best to protect you either way. Not just because I'm your protector, but because you're my best friend and I love you.
  24. I really wish Holland and Rhys weren't buttheads, though. I'd accept them in a heartbeat.
  25.  
  26. Aerach
  27. 12/20/2018
  28. I doubt
  29. that I will EVER
  30. have a firm grasp on who I am
  31. and to be forced to be alone forever because of that?
  32. I'd rather die.
  33.  
  34. .Jasper.
  35. 12/20/2018
  36. Of course not, sweetie. That's not what I meant at all.
  37. It's just that it seems like you always just.. You're very indecisive on a lot of things.
  38. Crash or did I upset you? :\
  39. You're going to find someone, Kian. You're amazing, and I know someone out there will be perfect for you.
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